.: Chapter Five: Hogwarts :.

"If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to strangle her at the same time, then you were probably an only child." – Linda Sunshine

For one of the first times in her life, Lily Evans had willingly and happily gotten right out of bed at six thirty in the morning—no dilly-dallying or a grumbled "five more minutes." But today, with the prospect of leaving the stifling confines of her childhood home for the magical sanctuary of Hogwarts, Lily was practically bouncing off the walls as she threw the remains of her clothing in her trunk. Now that summer was over, Lily was finally willing to admit that she had had enough of her sister to last her a while—especially considering the last two weeks. Petunia had gone from silent animosity and skillful ignoring to outright hostility and screaming matches ever night since their family outing. Her mother had told her numerous times that Tuney was just 'going through it,' but she wasn't 'going through it' with anyone else—only Lily.

It'd been three whole days since Lily had uttered a word towards her sister. When Lily had returned home from her father's mechanic shop a few days ago, Petunia had been waiting—waiting with a slew of insults that cut through Lily's skin like a knife, straight to the bone. Everything out of the ordinary that occurred in Petunia's life was seemingly always Lily's fault, no matter if she's there or not—no matter that Lily can't even use magic outside of Hogwarts, something she's told her sister no less than a hundred times. In this instance, a small harmless bunny had hopped into the house through the cat door and apparently sacred Petunia half to death. Obviously it wasn't Lily's fault, but Petunia wouldn't stop her screaming long enough to listen to her side of it.

Sometimes Lily likes to remember the good times that they used to have—all the days spent in the park or the games played in their living room. They used to be so close when they were in primary school, but then one sunny morning Lily had received her Hogwarts letter and Professor McGonagall had appeared on her doorstep. For the two weeks after McGonagall had taken the whole family to Diagon Alley, introducing them properly to the Wizarding World, and before Lily left for Hogwarts, Petunia had been just like her old self—if not a little more adamant that they were really "just the same type of person." But then Lily and her newfound friend, Severus, had unearthed Petunia's letter to Dumbledore and everything had changed—eventually snowballing and moving out of Lily's control before she even properly understood what was happening.

At first, Lily knew that Petunia was just jealous—upset that she too couldn't go to the fancy magical boarding school and instead was relegated to the public secondary school. Now, years of going to school in different countries—which allowed for all that resentment to fester—had forced them apart. Petunia had grown out of that petty jealously in recent years and she now harbored an actual dislike for Lily that reared its ugly head whenever Petunia was upset about something. They were family, though, and all this didn't mean that Lily cared for her sister any less. Petunia was just… misguided. They would have time to grow out of all this when they were adults—to learn from their differences and return to the loving camaraderie they'd had as children.

Today, though, Lily was ready for some solitude.

She grabbed the bath towel hanging over the back of her desk chair and made her way down the hall to claim the shower before Petunia could get there first and begin her long morning routine. The solitude from the Muggle world wasn't without its draw backs though. Lily missed her parents immensely when she was away and the four months out of the year where she did see them made all that much harder to be away. Usually she would just be getting used to life without magic—comfortable with its absence—when she would once again be boarding the Hogwarts Express.

Lily and her parents wrote letters to each other regularly, but words on paper weren't the same as her dad ruffling her hair or her mother singing along to her own music. Rose and Edward Evans were the best parents that Lily could ask for and she loved both of them dearly. They always made sure that Lily knew she was loved and missed while she was away, and they've stuck to the same traditions so at least one aspect of Lily's life had some normalcy in it. Like today, on the last morning before she returned to Hogwarts, her mother would make her a full breakfast with all her favorites and her father would read her the news out of the paper. Then they'd drive her to the station, watch her run through the magical barrier, and ensure she was safely on Platform Nine and Three-Quarters before taking their leave.

Lily sighed and tried to focus on finishing her shower before she ran out of hot water. She washed her hair twice—having neglected it in the past week—and made sure to get all the tricky spots when shaving her legs so despite her best efforts, the water was still chilly when she finally shut it off and threw open the curtain. Lily toweled off and dressed quickly, but decided to allow her hair to air-dry so her natural curl—or rather, the natural wave with two ringlets tops—could run wild. She was still patting down her hair with the towel when she ambled into the kitchen, drawn by the smell bacon. At the stove, her mum was faced away from her, humming along to the music emitting softly from the radio.

Rose Evans was a small woman, with dark hair that was shot through with strands of gray. Her face was heart-shaped, and her pale blue eyes were a stark contrast to her hair and they were always the first thing someone noticed about her. She had been more than a beautiful woman in her youth, but years of stress have added a few wrinkles around her eyes and mouth. Lily believed, though, that Rose was the epitome of the phrase "to age gracefully", and she was of the firm opinion that her mother was the most beautiful person to exist. Today, she wore a faded blue floral dress that was fraying a little on the hem and her customary red ruffled apron was tied around her waist.

"Morning, Mum," Lily greeted, kissing her on the cheek and taking a seat at the kitchen table.

"Good morning, dearie." Rose smiled. "How did you sleep?"

"That depends," Lily responded with a smirk at her mother's back as she flipped the pancakes on the stove.

"On what?" Rose asked, turning to look at her.

"On whether you'd like the 'I couldn't sleep because I'll miss you so much' version, or the 'I couldn't sleep because I'm so excited about going back to school' version." Lily giggled as she snagged a piece of bacon off the serving plate placed in front of her.

Her mother flicked some pancake batter at Lily that fell short and landed on the dining table. Rose sighed before retorting and Lily wiped up the spot before her father saw it and it make him weird.

"Don't be cheeky with me, young lady," she scolded half-heartedly. "The sun has barely risen. And I could just turn this food off and send you away hungry."

Lily rolled her eyes, but her mother didn't see.

"I'm going to miss you, baby," her mum said.

"I won't miss you, Mum," Lily sighed dramatically. "I might just miss your cooking, though—ooo, and maybe your singing… your baking… your smile…your really tight hugs…"

"Oh, hush up," Rose said, shaking her head. "Grab the juice and the glasses. Breakfast is almost ready."

.:..:.

Two hours later, Lily was sitting in the backseat of her father's read pickup truck. Fleetwood Mac was blaring on the radio and her parents were doing an awful job of singing along. Petunia was sitting next to Lily with her arms crossed and staring out the window with a sour look on her face, leaning as far away from Lily's owl Aurelian as she could. Lily, though, was content. Everything was as it should be, as seemingly dysfunctional as it was. She was going back to Hogwarts, her parents were holding hands over the center console, and Petunia was…well, Petunia.

Lily began to sing along, too.

Finding a parking spot in London was always difficult, but eventually her father was loading her things onto a trolley. As usual, Edward pushed it along for her while Lily kept a hand on Aurelian's cage to keep it from toppling as they were jostled by all the people around them. Her dad was a nostalgic person, so it wasn't a surprise when he started talking about the first time they'd done this walk through King's Cross. The comfort of the same routine, repeated year after year, eased the nerves starting to take root in her stomach. As much as her waxing about how great Hogwarts was, it was a stressful place full of trick stairs and grueling essays.

Lily buried her face in her mother's neck as Rose wrapped her arms tightly around her. They were standing a few feet away from the barrier, next to the sign that said 'Platform Nine.'

"This seems to be the end of the road for your ordinary Muggle family." Rose smiled sadly, softly touching her cheek and pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"You lot are anything but ordinary," Lily corrected. "I love you guys, and I'll see you at Christmas."

"Not so fast young lady," Edward said, even though Lily had made no move to go anywhere. "Give your old man a hug, and let me give you the Speech."

"Ah, yes," Lily laughed. "The Speech."

Her dad stood up straighter and cleared his throat as he rested a hand on her shoulder. He always acted so serious, and it amused her to no end. Every year before she went through the barrier, her father would give her the so eloquently named 'Speech'. Although the first few lines remained the same, something different was added to it every year. Lily secretly thought that her father worked on it all year round just to be ready when the time came.

The first year that she walked through the barrier with Professor McGonagall, the concept that there were actual witches and wizards living among them was still very fresh in all their minds. The advice, then, was simple: pay attention in class, and learn as much as she possibly could about her new world. Second year was different, and she could still remember the amused glint in her father's eye when he told her to not punch that Mulciber kid in the face again, and to find different ways to handle bullies. Lily still laughed about that sometimes, as she'd found a particularly nasty boils hex that she'd used instead. In her third year, the year that James Potter became a beacon of trouble in her life, he'd told her to not get any more detentions because of 'that damned Potter kid.' She got one in her first week back when he used a sticking charm to glue her hair to the back of her seat. She found it appropriate to respond with her new found need for colorful language. Professor McGonagall had sternly told her that, "even if the circumstances were worthy of crass wording, didn't mean that they were allowed nor necessary".

Before her fourth year, her father told her to simply make new friends. That was the year that she'd found Alice Fortesque crying in the fourth floor loo because her dorm mates were making fun of her shortly cropped hair. The persistent teasing coming from the older girl's dormitory was enough for Lily to invite Alice to stay with her and her friends in their dorm—after she'd agreed, they asked McGonagall to conjure another bed, and then Ailana shaved her head in a show of solidarity.

Last year, her fifth year, it was to stick by Severus. Lily thought it was simply because her father knew how much his friendship meant to her, despite the complaints she had written home about him. She wasn't sure how much her father actually wanted her to remain friends with him, but he had indulged her anyway. She'd tried to listen to him last year, she really did, and it resulted in one of the worst falling outs in Hogwarts history.

Every year, no matter if she listens to the advice or not, it was still the thing that brought her father comfort before he sent his daughter away for three-quarters of the year. It also allowed her to carry a part of her father with her when she was at school, and it allows her to focus on something other than schoolwork when it gets to be too overwhelming. So every year, she simply pretends to forget about the 'Speech' because she secretly yearns for the fatherly advice, no matter how small or inconsequential it may seem.

She smiled and looked into her father's emerald eyes—her eyes, and prompted him to begin.

"Now that you're off into your own little world, which I imagine is anything but little, you've got to follow these three simple steps to be a successful young…" he looked around suspiciously before whispering, "witch. Step one: Never dumb yourself down for anybody, not even for some hotshot sports star that's trying to gain your attention. Step two: Don't break too many rules. A couple of them are alright then and again, but break too many and it may seem like a–"

"–Cry for attention," Lily completed, interrupting him with a smile, knowing that that was what he was going to say, despite this being the new part of the Speech.

"Hey, if you interrupt the Speech, it takes away its authenticity," Edward laughed, raising his eyebrows.

Lily mimed zipping her mouth shut.

"Step three: Stick up for people who can't stick up for themselves, and don't allow anyone to degrade you or tell you that you're less than what you are. Because any daughter of Rose Evans is going to go on to do great things," he said. His eyes briefly flicked towards his wife lovingly, before turning back to Lily. He lowered his voice and leaned closer to her. "But… if you believe the bad things others say about you then you allow them to win. No daughter of mine would ever allow anyone to do that, right?" her dad asked.

"Right," Lily responded just as quietly.

"Okay, ready for me to bring it home?" he asked, his voice brightening again.

"Of course, Dad." Lily smiled.

"This year's oh-so-great-advice, Lily, is to take a chance. Do something that you wouldn't normally do and don't give a damn about what anyone else thinks about it. For the first year since you've become aware of your other life, Severus is not there to hold you back. I know that he meant a lot to you, and that he was the beginning of everything for you, but he kept you from the other things that you wanted to pursue. Or the other people you wanted to pursue. So this year, I want you to take a chance," Edward finished.

"I will Dad, thank you," Lily said, her face reddening as her thoughts derailed slightly.

"But, you don't always have to follow my advice because I'm getting old. I wouldn't listen to too many things that come out of my mouth because," he leaned in and lowered his voice comically, "I think I'm getting senile."

Her mum let out a snort from where she stood behind Lily, and even Petunia looked to be hiding a smile when Lily peeked over her shoulder. Lily gave her parents each one more hug, her mother holding on to her for longer than usual, before turning, at last, to her sister. Petunia allowed Lily to hug her, but it was stiff and formal, nothing like the hug a departing sister would be expected to give.

Lily said goodbye one last time, and jogged through the barrier. She looked at the clock and squeaked, realizing she only had ten minutes before the train would be pulling out of the station. Not having the time to find her friends on the platform beforehand, Lily settled for lugging her trunk down the corridor in search of the girls. Of course, they were at the complete opposite end of the train, and her arms were aching by the time she found them.

She gave a very un-Lily-like squeal when she opened the compartment door and laid eyes on Emmeline Vance, whom she hadn't seen since school released at the end of last term.

"Emmeline!" Lily yelled, pouncing on her friend and nearly smothering her in a hug. "Where have you been? You could've written more than twice, you fool!"

"You know me," Emmeline chuckled. "You're looking at the most unreliable letter writer ever."

"So tell me now!" Lily said, pushing herself into a sitting position. "What have you been up to that kept you too busy to write?"

"There better be either a handsome bloke or a pretty bird involved in this story," Ailana interrupted, propping her feet up on Marlene's lap. "Otherwise, I probably don't want to hear it."

"You do know that Emmeline is probably the straightest person here, right?" Lily laughed.

"I do," Ailana said, "but that doesn't mean I can't hold out hope that I can turn her yet."

"Please Ailana," Emmeline scoffed. "We all know that you're hopelessly in love with me and are trying in vain to win me over. You wish you could get a girl like me."

"No, I do believe that it would be you who would be lucky to get a girl like me," Ailana smirked. "I'm quite the catch, if you haven't noticed."

"Be that as it may," Emmeline smiled. "There is a bloke and Merlin… he makes even you look like a mere seven Ailana."

Ailana sat up and leaned forward eagerly. "Well I'll be damned, please tell us of this oh-so-handsome man that beats even the woes of me."

"Yeah, how'd you meet him?" Lily asked.

"What's his name?" Marlene added.

"His name is Miguel," Emmeline began hesitantly. "We met when my family and I were staying in our villa in Tuscany. He worked at one of the local shops and offered to help me carry my groceries home when my bike got a flat tire. It's the most cliché way we could have met. Honestly, it was almost straight out of one of those romance novels that my mother loves, but I guess that clichés are clichés for a reason… they're cute and they work."

"What's he like though?" Mary asked.

"Oh, he's brilliant," Emmeline sighed dreamily. "He makes the best Ribollita that you'll ever have, and just the way he talks makes you… melt. Even my father liked him."

"Hmm," Ailana mused. "I would like to try this man's Ribollita."

"That's all you got out of that?" Marlene laughed.

"In case you've forgotten, love, mooning over men is about my least favorite thing to do," Ailana said snobbishly. "Plus, Ribollita happens to be my favorite dish. It's the only non-Spanish dish that my grandmother makes, and we eat it every time we go to visit her. It's the best part of the whole trip, especially when all she wants to do is set me up with the 'boys down the road.'"

"Anyway, moving away from the beginning of Ailana's tiff with her grandmother," Lily said quickly, looking at Ailana out of the corner of her eye and giving her a reassuring smile. "What about dates? Where was your favorite one?"

"Can't we talk about your summers?" Emmeline deflected. "Or literally anything else."

"No," everyone chorused at once. Emmeline sighed, and looked to the ceiling like she was praying for patience, but Lily knew that she was secretly excited to tell them everything about it.

"About a week before I was due to come back home, he took me out into the country where he had a whole set up, honestly the whole shebang. There was a picnic blanket and candles and wine and chocolate…" She sighed. "It was beautiful. He told me that it was his favorite place in the world because it was easier to see the stars, but I think he just wanted to get us away from distractions and the people who were always interrupting our dates."

"Interrupting, huh?" Ailana said, raising an eyebrow.

"Does your brain naturally go there or do you just never leave?" Lily blushed. "Not everything that gets interrupted is sexual."

"You're absolutely right Lils," Emmeline smirked. "But you know how Ailana's got that knack for always being right about things."

"You didn't?" Marlene gasped.

"I did," Emmeline confirmed whimsically. "In a field under the stars."

"Damn," Mary said. "He sure knows how to woo a girl doesn't he?"

Or say the right things, the cynical part of Lily's brain whispered. She was happy for her friend, of course she was, but summer romances never seemed to last and she didn't wish Emmeline any unnecessary heartbreak.

"Too right you are," Emmeline smiled, obviously not feeling the same way about it that Lily was.

"Wait 'till Alice hears about this, though," Marlene laughed. "Her maternal instincts will kick in like wildfire, and you'll be questioned half to death about whether or not you used protection."

"Speaking of Alice… where is she?" Lily asked, trying again to hide her blush.

Mary scoffed.

"What?" Lily asked.

"She got Head Girl this year and didn't bother to tell any of us!" Ailana supplied.

"But why wouldn't she tell us?" Lily wondered. "That's an amazing accomplishment! I'm so proud of her!"

"Beats us," Emmeline answered.

"But she should still be here, shouldn't she?" Lily asked.

"No," Ailana smirked. "There's a Prefects meeting right about now that you happen to be ten minutes late for."

"Shit," Lily hissed, jumping up from her seat. "Why didn't you remind me sooner?"

"We like for you to suffer!" Ailana yelled as Lily stumbled over her friends and fell out of the compartment.

She jogged down the corridor towards the Prefects carriage and came upon it just as Remus Lupin, her Gryffindor Prefect counterpart, was walking in, so she suddenly wasn't as worried about being as late as she was. However, she was still extremely late, and more than a few people eyed her disdainfully as she shut the door behind her. She caught Alice's eye as she slid into the middle bench of the Gryffindor section and gave her a wink and an encouraging smile. Lily wasn't at all surprised to see that Frank Longbottom was standing next to her with a shiny Head Boy badge pinned on his chest. 'The head dorms were going to be extra cozy this term,' Lily thought, chuckling under her breath.

"Great," Frank said, clapping his hands. "Now that everyone's here we can begin. I'm sure most of you already know who we are, but for those who don't, I'm Frank Longbottom, and this here is the lovely Alice Fortesque, and we're your Head students this year. I'd like to start with congratulating the new fifth year Prefects and remind them that they have to read the booklet I gave them or they will be terminated."

"He's kidding," Alice laughed, trying to ease the tension once she caught sight of the terrified looks on the younger students' faces. "Just know that you're supposed to step in when confronted with a disciplinary situation, and if you have any questions, just let us know."

"Right, what she said." Frank chuckled. "Secondly, for this year we're going to keep the Patrol partners the same as last year unless there's an equitable circumstance. If that's the case, then you can just bring it to us and we'll deal with it accordingly."

"That means for fifth years, you'll have to work with a fellow fifth year, but not necessarily the other Prefect in your house. Inter-house patrols are perfectly acceptable, encouraged even," Alice added. "But we plan to have you paired with a seventh year from your own house for your first patrol so you can be shown the ropes by someone who you should already be familiar with."

"Thirdly, fifth years, while you're on the train, you need to make regular patrols and badges must be worn at all times. You can't discipline without them. At the end of the day, if you've taken charge of a situation where you had to give a detention, then you need to fill out a report and put it in either mine or Alice's tray in the Heads Office," Frank said. His carefree manner was infectious, and Lily couldn't help but smile at him. "Do you have anything else to add, love?"

"All that's left is the matter of the dorm passwords. They're pinned on the board by the door, and they're charmed, so you can only read the one that you'll need to access your House's dormitory. Make sure you look at them before you leave. Fifth years need to show the new first years in their respective houses to their dorms after the Welcome Feast, so make sure you wait up for them in the Great Hall. Also, on your way out the door, we need all of the older Prefects to sign up for two patrol spots, and we'll make the schedule for the rest of term," Alice informed.

"That covers everything," Frank said, clapping his hands once.

"We'll see you guys in two weeks," Alice finished.

Remus leaned over and half-whispered into her ear.

"They're going to get married one day," he said.

"I know." Lily smiled.

.:..:.

After greeting Frank and Alice with a hug and apologizing for her lateness, Lily exited the compartment and was surprised to see that Remus was following along behind her—even though they'd originally came from opposite directions. They made it through two whole train cars with Remus was still following her, so Lily turned and started walking backwards, eyeing him.

"You coming to say hello to the girls, or something?" Lily asked.

"Or something," he smiled. "James told me that they were going in search of Emmeline because of some Italian chocolate that she promised them. I'm assuming they're still there annoying everybody."

"Hmm," Lily murmured, still walking backwards. Remus reached out to lay a steadying hand on her arm to move her around the group of third years packing up the hallway.

Lily and Remus correspond regularly over the summer holidays, so she was already caught up on everything in his life, but she still said, "Can I ask you a question, Remus?"

He took a second before answering, likely thinking of all the other times his friends have asked him things. "Sure," he said warily.

"How's Sirius?" Lily asked. "I figured you'd have different information than Potter would considering that… well, you know."

"Considering what?" he asked, obviously confused.

"Oh," Lily gasped hurriedly. "Nevermind, I didn't mean anything. I just—uh, I just thought he'd… well that he'd tell you something different than what he told Potter, that's all."

She tried not to blush, but she was a redhead and it was inevitable, so she spun back around to walk properly and looped her arm through his. She's seen the way that Remus looked at Sirius, and the way that he always seemed to be more attentive to Sirius's moods. Maybe she was reading too much into it.

"Okay, well I'll ignore the fact that you just lied to me," Remus began, "and tell that I really do think he's doing better. Mrs. Potter barely left him alone all summer, and they spent every morning of the last week of holiday eating breakfast and playing chess together. And Hogwarts is always good for him, you know that, so I think it can only be uphill from here."

Lily nodded and held onto Remus's arm a little tighter. "Plus, being around everyone at school will be a nice change of pace for him," she added, pulling from her own experience of Sirius's moods. "Other people will be good for him, let him blend into the crowd and settle himself a little."

"When have you ever known Sirius to blend into anything?" Remus laughed. "He's about as dramatic and outgoing as someone could get."

They finally reached the compartment, and the sheer amount of noise resonating from behind the closed door almost made Lily want to head in the opposite direction. Remus had a hold of her arm, though, so she was pulled over the threshold with him.

"My, my, Red," Sirius clucked over the din. "I'm almost positive your hair is more vibrant now than it was when I last saw you."

"You're seeing things, Black," she retorted, lightly shoving him out of the way so she could sit next to Ailana (which also happened to be across from Potter, but she ignored that small fact). Sirius exaggerated her push, and fell back into his seat with a loud 'oof.' He stretched his arms above his head, flexing his biceps as he did—whether intentionally or not, and tipped his head back to the ceiling. Lily surreptitiously glanced in Remus's direction to see him eye the curve of Sirius's neck. He swallowed audibly and looked down at his hands.

'Oblivious,' she thought with an eye-roll.

"Oi, Evans," James nudged her knee with the tip of his shoe. "What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?"

"Ugh, not again, Potter," Lily groaned, leaning her head on Ailana's shoulder in exasperation. "I'm sure I've heard this one before."

"You've never heard it!" James insisted. "I just thought of it!"

"Yeah, he thinks of 'em all on his own and immediately says, 'oh, I have to tell Lily this new joke I made up! Do you think she'll laugh, Padfoot? Do you?'" Sirius said, in a pretty accurate imitation of James's accent. There was a slight flush high on James's cheeks, and Lily felt as though her face was on fire, but he just looked back to her and nodded enthusiastically.

"Lily, what do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?" he repeated, that sparkle in his eyes that Lily had always, despite her best efforts, adored.

Lily knew that James was a charming bloke, but she much preferred this version of him. The unguarded version, and the one that blushed when his best friend teased him. The best version of James was the one who stuttered over his words, tripped over his own feet, and ran restless hands through his hair. She would only admit this on her deathbed, but she liked being able to make him incoherent. It made her feel like an actual woman to be able to make—Morgana strike her down—an attractive bloke fall all over himself.

"I don't know, Potter," she finally relented. "What do you get?"

"Frostbite!" he exclaimed.

She laughed.

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James grinned, but tried not to let the full amount of the joy he was feeling show on his face. Making Lily laugh was one of the highlights of his life, and he wouldn't trade it for anything. Her laugh was like… sunshine, and he knew that Sirius would laugh himself sick if he ever said that out loud, but that was the simplest way to describe it to someone. It was also like a favorite song that you hadn't heard in a while, but never forgot about. Or maybe it was like the warm comfort of a crackling fire after a day spent in the snow. Honestly, James could go on about her laugh forever and never run out of cliché, poetic metaphors.

He could strangle Sirius right now, though, for that comment he made and the fact that it caused Lily embarrassment. As much as he loved the warm flush on her face, and the way that it always crept up her neck first, he didn't want to embarrass her. He still felt like he was on thin ice because of the 'incident' that happened at the end of last term, and pushing her right now wasn't something he wanted or needed. It certainly wouldn't help him in the long run. And besides, he much preferred it when she flushed in anger; he loved the way it made her eyes shine like emeralds in the sea.

He was still watching her giggle when Emmeline piped up from down the bench. "Oh I forgot to ask, Lils," she said. "How's George?"

"He's a right piece of shite," Lily disclosed. "But I love him anyway."

George? Love? He was definitely missing something because there was no way that Lily had a boyfriend that he didn't know about. And even if she did, James didn't want to think about it—like at all.

"What's going to happen now that you're at school?" Mary asked.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. I was promised pictures and updates." She sighed dramatically.

Pictures? James was sure he was going to combust. His hands were a little sweaty, and he no longer knew how to sit properly. Where were his feet supposed to go? And was the bench always this hard? What should he do with his hands?

He was hot. He ran a hand through his hair, and Lily zeroed in on the motion. He lowered his hand immediately, remembering, even in his flustered state, how much she hated when he did that. Yup, he was going to pass out.

"I didn't know you were seeing someone," Peter piped up from the floor. "Is he a Muggle?"

James had never appreciated the small blonde boy as much as he did in that moment. He never would have been able to voice the question on his own because his stomach was lodged somewhere in his throat. However, he was absolutely certain that he didn't know if he wanted to hear the answer.

"What?" Lily scrunched up nose and looked to her friends.

Ailana started laughing first, and Lily joined her soon after.

Sunshine, his mind automatically supplied.

"George is nine months old," Lily managed to say between laughs. "Katie, that's his mum, couldn't afford to take a lot of time off of work, so I babysat for her this summer. I don't have a boyfriend."

James let out a puff of air, and Sirius jabbed him in the side with his very pointy elbow. James remembered where to put his feet.

.:..:.

The rest of the train ride passed in pleasurable company. James listened animatedly to everyone's recollections of their summers, joining Sirius in his embellishments of their own stories. Laughter reflected on everyone's faces, and James was glad to see the glimmer back in Sirius's eyes. Things were going to return to normal, and everything was going to be okay. James was sure of it. As the Astronomy tower finally came into view, the compartment was, miraculously, silent. The moment felt comfortable and almost intimate. No one spoke, not wanting to interrupt their first glance of their home away from home.

James and his friends trudged back to their own compartment two train cars down to change into their school robes before the train rolled into Hogsmeade station. With all the bustle of activity on the platform, it was practically impossible to find the girls again, although he knew that he saw a quick flash of Lily's red hair. James stepped into the carriage behind Peter, and they started moving before anyone other than the four of them could climb in.

On the last stretch of lane to the front doors, the entirety of Hogwarts finally came into view. Sirius was joking around with Peter, but James just peered out over the Black Lake to the hulking mass of stone. Even after growing up with magic in his life from day one, there was still something so breathtakingly… magical about Hogwarts. Even the outside looked as though it belonged in a book rather than real life. The inside though—Oh, the inside, that was something straight out of James most well-imagined prank. The moving staircases that seem to malfunction on purpose; the hundreds upon hundreds of talking portraits; the Forbidden Forest and its' gamekeeper, Hagrid; Peeves; the enchanted ceiling in the Great Hall; the ghosts that had no consideration for personal space; and the Whomping Willow on full moons… everything had a certain quality that there were no words for.

Disembarking onto the front steps, the chatter of the other students permeated James's subconscious. Peter gave him a shove in the back, and James responded with smack to the back of the head. He was here.

Only a few students milled around outside the castle doors, likely searching for their friends, but everyone else made their way into the Entrance Hall, almost as if they were in a trance. Lily and the girls had made it to the Great Hall before them, so the Marauders snagged the four seats to their left. Sirius fell into Mary's side and exclaimed that it had been too long since they'd seen each other.

"We saw each other twenty minutes ago, Black," Mary had replied, putting a palm to Sirius's face and pushing him away. He collapsed against Remus instead, but what he said was lost to James's ears. James had forgot how loud the Feasts were, but when Sirius sat straight up after Remus had whispered a reply into his ear, James reasoned that he didn't want to hear it anyway. Whatever makes Sirius blush, was something that was sure to make James have a coronary.

It finally began to quiet down when the first years followed McGonagall into the hall. They were all huddled together in a tight group, as if they feared straying to far from the person next to them would cause them to be swallowed up by the void.

"I feel like they get tinier every year," Sirius murmured. "It looks as if I could crush the lot of 'em under my boot without even realizing it."

James snorted, but tried to turn it into a cough.

"They look petrified," Sirius chuckled.

"I distinctly remember that you were scared out of your wits as well," James reminded.

"You would be too if you expected be put in Slytherin. It was very clear that if I wasn't in Slytherin, then I'd be a disgrace to the name of Black," Sirius intoned sarcastically. "My family's been in Slytherin since the beginning of time, even sweet ole Andromeda. But I associated Slytherin with my family, whom I hate, so I knew I had no chance of being placed there. You can bet your bloody tea-cozies I was fucking terrified."

James tried to ignore Remus and Lily's dark looks from the other side of the table, but they were scorching. James, realizing his mistake in bringing up this line of conversation, reached across the table and gripped his best mates shoulder.

"Sorry," James whispered. "That was stupid of me to say."

"Don't be sorry," Sirius scoffed. "There was nothing to be worried about. Everything worked out the way it should be… my family is still a pile of dung-heads, and the hat put me in Gryffindor."

Sirius shrugged, and James hated himself a little more as he saw Sirius's shaking hand disappear under the table. Before he could think of anything worthy enough to say, McGonagall called forth the first lucky eleven year old. He was a scrawny kid that was shaking like a leaf, but he managed to conceal it fairly well for a first year. In fact, James wouldn't have even noticed it if he hadn't been uncomfortable and pointedly ignoring Remus and Lily's heated stares.

As soon as the hat touched the boys' head, it bellowed: "SLYTHERIN!"


sorry this took so long to update, college has decided to kick my ass. as always, thanks to my beta's, i love you both :)) thank you so much for reading! I honestly expected literally no one to do that and now i have over 800 views and actual reviews from real live people jdksdj.

so i know that this is 'back to hogwarts,' but the next chapter is the first one that actually takes place IN hogwarts and i'm ready for y'all to read it!