Disclaimer
We don't own the bikes, brothers, or any "related" Sons of Anarchy, trust us, if we did we wouldn't have the time to write. No money is being made from our stories. So, please don't sue. It'd be a fruitless endeavor indeed. That being said, Harley, Journee, and any other newbies are ours, and we don't share. :Whispers in creepy voice: "My precious."
The universe
This reality is a mix of cannon, and our own ideas. We strive to keep the boys cannon, but since we will be shifting around some of the events, that will reflect in our writing and their personalities as well. It's our goal to provide you with quality fiction, and solid, fleshed out OFC.
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tellerford/
Translations
Cailín álainn ~ Beautiful Girl
Handsome ( Literal meaning possessing charm and attractive)
Chapter 5
Journee
I wake expecting to hear birds chirping and cute baby animals in my front lawn. Surely last night must've been a dream. I touch my swollen lips and know it wasn't. I giggle to myself as I roll onto my back and stare at the ceiling. I'm dating Chibs.Most bikers don't date, but my soulful poetry reading Scot is anything but the ordinary biker. I think he's got such a soft touch, because he's seen and been involved in so much violence. I've been there for the nightmares that wake him from a dead sleep and leave him disoriented and depressed. When he gets dark, I worry for him.
The Chibs of now is a far cry from the brooding mess that arrived from across the pond fifteen years prior. It doesn't mean he's completely shaken the overwhelming sorrow that catches him unaware from time to time. The man has lived a dozen lives, each more horrifying and bloody than the last. From the hungry leans years where he worked with crooks and cons to keep his family afloat, to his time in the army where I think he lost a part of himself.
It's why that bitch was able to get her claws into him. The thought of Chibs vulnerable and looking to belong only to stumble onto Fiona and her schemes has always pissed me off. The man's a proud Scot, it wasn't the mission of unification he cared about. It was the love of a woman. Being a loyal man of his word, he remained involved. It's why he's the contact now. He'll never talk against them, but I know he's not into the cause soul deep.
Women aren't supposed to be involved, but I'm neither dumb or blind. I've heard the calls. The long conversations in Gaelic, and the late night meetings with Irishmen from out of town. It's vital to their gun trade. Those are the nights when the shadows appear in his eyes and a new updated photo of Kerrianne arrives. I stretch my arms above my head and sit up. I have the opportunity to lighten that burden and change his sadness to joy now. I smile and reach over to the nightstand. If I don't tell Lee she'll murder me.
"Please tell me there's a reason you're calling me at fucking seven in the morning."
"I need you to come over."
"What's wrong?" She asks sounding more awake.
"Nothing's wrong, but I can't tell you over the phone."
She groans.
"Late night?"
"Yeah. I was looking into some email from the Internal Revenue. They like to shake our tree every couple of years and see what falls out."
"Jesus. Anything to worry about?"
"Not yet. I need to make sure it's legit. You'd be amazed how many scams there are out there that seem like the real thing."
"God, I can't even imagine," I say.
"Jammies okay?"
"Preferred. Then I don't have to get dressed."
She laughs. "Give me ten to brush my teeth and do something with my bird's nest of hair and I'll be over."
"I'll even make you a proper Irish Coffee and put those cinnamon rolls I've been saving for a rainy day in the oven."
"Ahh, this is why I love you."
"And here I thought it was for my ass."
"Well, that helps too," Lee purrs.
I laugh. "See you when you get here."
I toss the blanket aside and ease out of the comfortable bed. I have no clue what time we made it back to my place, but I know it was extremely late. I'm not even sure why I woke up so early. Excitement maybe. My phone vibrates. I grab it off my nightstand on my way to the kitchen.
Good morning Cailín álainn ~ C
Chibs' text makes me sigh. He's a romantic heart. I'm not familiar with the words. I'll have to look them up. But even more I want to give back. I hit the speaker voice.
"What's the Scottish Gaelic word for handsome?" I receive the answer and butterflies flutter in my belly.
Good morning, Breagha ~ J
Are you learning my language love? ~ C
I'm picking things up here and there. ~ J
I translate his words and my heart sings. Beautiful girl.I'm hit with a sense of rightness. This is it. The final stop I'm going to make in my relationship derby. The thought of not having this with Chibs make me sick. It's like a dam has broken and now everything is flowing. It's like nothing I've experienced before. I move to the oven, turn it on to preheat and continue to text until he starts to work on his first car for the day. I wash my hands, set up the cinnamon rolls, toss them in the oven and dash to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I don't even bother to remove my satin bonnet. Lee has seen me every way possible by now. It's what makes our relationship so very easy and yet complex.
I hear her key in the lock and I grab our mugs and move to the black Kindle Chibs bought me a few Christmas's ago. I'm adding a healthy dose of Bailey's to our cups when she walks in.
"Morning babe."
"Morning," I say as I add our caramel creamer and a touch of whiskey and sugar.
"It smells good." She walks up behind me and hugs me from behind. I lean back against her.
"The cinnamon rolls will be done in another ten minutes. I just need to make the frosting."
She kisses my cheek and steps back as I finish stirring the Bad Ass and Brilliant mug with blue roses I bought for her.
"Thank you." She takes a sip and I grab my own.
We drink in silence letting the daily dose of caffeine chase away our late night drag. I sit down the nearly empty cup and take out butter and cream cheese. I toss it into my turquoise Kitchen aide and allow her to finish her coffee. The oven chimes and I remove the cinnamon rolls to let them cool before I apply the flesh topping.
"Better?" I ask as she sets down her cup.
"Much. You want to tell me what's going on?"
"Chibs took me star gazing last night."
"Shut the fuck up? Are you serious right now? This fucking Scot stepped up his game."
I giggle and nod.
"Wait. Something happened didn't it?" she asks grasping my hands.
"yes, we're dating." I scream.
We jump up and down like I won the lottery.
"That's fucking amazing, Nee. I am so happy for you."
"Thank you. I'm still in shock."
"How does he kiss?" she asks.
"Girl, like he wants me to throw my panties at him and call him Daddy."
She throws her head back and gives the full bellied laugh I love. "God, you guys are going to be so damn adorable. If it were anyone else I'd be hating."
I laugh. "Am I stupid for being happy? You know how these things end for me—"
"No. I'm not going to let you kill your joy. Chibs is not any of those guys. You guys have been in this weird limbo for a long time. Other than sex, Id' say you were pretty much a couple."
I blink and mull over her words. He's been my male companion. The one I call when I'm lonely. The only person I do anything remotely romantic or date like with. "Oh my God, have we been?"
"Yes."
"I think he's the one," I whisper.
She smiles and cups my face. "I think so too."
"Whoa." I exhale and fan my face. "This is so crazy."
She smiles at me and I hold her hand, calming down. Just as before, she'll walk with me through this. I'm not alone.
"I know what you're thinking. It's normal after the stains you dated, but Chibs knows you almost as well as I do, and I doubt there's another being on the planet who knows Chibs as well. He doesn't do deep with anyone else. He's not going to change. You know he loved the chocolate."
I laugh. "True." Race has always been an issue in previous relationships. I was either too black, and they wanted me to change things, like my natural hair, or the way I talked, or I was too much of a good girl. Kyle didn't want an old lady. He wanted a crow eater who agreed to exclusive sex, and maybe the clout that would come from nailing the only Grim Bastards daughter around.
"They are your past. Chibs is your future. That's the difference. They don't deserve another moment of your time. If you don't stop. I may have to tell Chibs, and we know how he is about you. Might track down the fuckers and gut them with those giant knives."
I moan. The thought is oddly arousing.
"Ahh there's my little knife whore."
"Can't help it. It's in my blood."
"Aye." She mocks Chibs and the worry passes.
"Come on, help me glaze the cinnamon rolls so we can dig in. I know it goes without saying not to tell anyone. But we're keeping this to ourselves for as long as possible. You know how the brothers can be."
She snorts. "Do I ever. Don't worry. My lips are sealed."
"Are you ready, Mo Astor?"
I tilt my head to the side, unfamiliar with the phrase.
"That's a new one."
"I'm going to let you figure out what it means," he says. The smile he gives me is stunning. I never realize how much he holds back until he let's go. I run through a quick mental list. Beach towels, sun block, books, snacks, and a flask to spike our soda and juice.
"Yeap, we have everything."
He holds out his hand and I give him the beach bag. "I can carry it. It's not heavy."
"Ye don't need to do anything around me. Don't ye know yer my Queen?"
My face heats. A couple of weeks in and I'm still not used to how well he treats me. Part of me doesn't believe I deserve it. Having him be with me is more than I ever thought. I know how much he loved his wife and still follows his religion. I've been to enough masses to know it helps keep him balanced. The rosary and beads are more than decoration.
"You do know that don'tcha?"
"Know what?" I ask embarrassed.
"Know that you're worth it. Any man with you should be thanking the good Lord above, blessed him with your favor. I know I aint ideal, Journee. I'm too old, used up, and scarred, and I don't just mean this," he gestures toward his cheeks. "But I will treat you better than anyone could, give you everything you want, and take care of you."
"Chibs, you give me everything I need and more without trying."
"You've got blinders on gal. I pray they never come off."
His soft spoken words pull me out of the quicksand of self-doubt I'd been sinking in.
"It's been years. I don't think I'll be changing anything."
His eyes burn into mine and I lick my dry lips. The atmosphere charges. We're on the verge of something amazing, and scared out of our minds. I can see my fear reflected in his dark gaze. But I'm willing to walk through fire for this man, so I can face the fright head on. I step forward until our lips our millimeters apart. I brush my mouth overs his. The tingles start as I open up our connection.
"You are literally the man of my dreams. The first person I ever dreamed of marrying is now mine. What more could a girl ask for?"
He rests his forehead against mine and wraps his calloused fingers around the back of my neck.
"You've no idea how much your words or you mean. But I plan to show you. We're going to have to come out soon. I'm tired of hiding us. I have something I need to do first though, "he says.
"Okay."
"Let's go before I forget we're due to go to the beach." He traces my lips with the tip of his tongue and I shudder. My stomach clenches and my pussy drips. All I have to do is be in the same room with Chibs, and I flow like a faucet. I suck his tongue into my mouth and he moans. He tastes like mint and smoke. I tilt my head, and our tongue slick together. He pulls me to his body. His firm chest and harder cock tease me.
"Fuck, you're a temptation." He groans and pulls away slapping my ass. "Out of the house with ye."
I giggle as we walk out of the house to my car.
***Later***
Lee
"Are you ready?" I ask.
"Oh yeah, he's been down the rabbit hole for way too long," Journee agrees. The yellow dish gloves on our hands are to keep us from touching whatever nastiness has accumulated in his dorm. Jax isn't handling his impending fatherhood well at all. He's fallen into what we call as the pussy pit. If he's not working, or doing something for the club, he's drinking, drunk, or fucking. Hell, if he's feeling like a winner that day he might do both. It breaks my heart to see him in such rough shape.
The spoiled man-child is being forced into a situation where he actually has to put someone else first, and it's not going too well. Not that it's entirely his fault. This is what happens when you don't make you children be accountable for anything. I thank God that my grandmother took me when my father moved to Jersey. If not for that, I'd be just as deluded and selfish once Gemma finished with me. Probably worse because I'd officially be the princess. I wrinkle my nose.
"We need to knock some sense into this boy," Journee drawls sounding so much like her mother, Sugar, it's not funny.
"We will. Why do you think Gem sent us back here? You know she can't stand to do it."
"Yeah, that's how we got here in the first place. I know my parents weren't having this mess. Only girl or not I got my ass whopped growing up when I did wrong," Journee says.
"I remember. I was on the receiving end of some of those," I say dryly.
She laughs. "They spank us together and wonder why you tie me up and spank my ass."
"Oh my God, do they know about that?" I whisper.
She shrugs. "I never said anything. But I wouldn't be surprised. Daddy has a way of knowing all."
"Truth."
I turn the key in the lock. "Ready?"
"Yeap."
"On three. One, two, three." I turn the knob and we step inside. The smell of stale air, beer, and pussy assault us.
"Bloody hell." Journee screams.
Jax startles on the bed, falling off the side. I sit back and let little sister go at him first.
"Get your half naked funky ass off the floor and into the shower. It smells like rotten fish. I hope you used condoms."
"What the fuck..." Jax groans.
"Fucking is what got you in this mess in the first place Teller," Journee barks. I can see Menace in her right now.
"The hell are you two doing in here?" Jax asks, gripping the side of the bed.
"Saving you from alcohol poison by the looks of it," I say.
He pushes his blond locks back off his face. "I'm fine."
"No, you are not fine little prince," Journee snaps.
"I'm with her Jax. This has got to stop. We're all worried about you right now. I know this isn't easy, but binge drinking and running through Crow Eaters like it's a sex-a-thon isn't helping a damn thing."
"You want to have two bitches knocked up. Huh? You going to make me start hiding bodies in the desert?"
"What?" Jax chuckles, and I try to hide my snicker.
"Careful, Nee. The Bastard in you is coming out."
"Just get Casanova to the bathroom while I start on this mess. Jesus Christ. I know you were using condoms because they're in a pile on the fucking floor. You are disgusting Jackson Nathaniel Teller."
"Love you too?"
I stride over to his side and half yank him to his feet as I usher him off to the shower. The strong scent of alcohol hits me. He stumbles along and I know he's still buzzing from the night before.
I turn my head to keep my nose downwind.
"You know better than to set her off. You're going to get your ass chewed out again."
"She wasn't finished with the first time yet. Didn't think Ise in danger."
"Are you still drunk?"
"A little?"
"Come on Jax. What are you doing here?"
The sound of Led Zeppelin fills the air as Journee begins the massive undertaking of cleaning his pig sty.
I kick the door shut and push him down onto the toilet lid. His eyelids droop and my anger rises. I grab his shoulder, yank him up and force him into the tub basin. He reaches out behind him to keep from cracking his skull open.
"The fuck Lee!"
I turn on the shower.
"Shit. Are you fucking crazy?"
"No, I'm pissed and disappointed. Come on. You can do better than this."
"Maybe I can't."
"I refuse to buy that bullshit you're selling."
He slides down and tilts his head down letting the water soak his head. "Why?"
"Cause I know you. Would I be here getting your ass straight if I thought you were a lost cause?"
"I don't know. I'm pretty much a total fuck up here. I knocked up an unstable bitch who's already keeping me out of my kids life. Hell, I don't even know how far along she is."
His pathetic look breaks my heart.
"Look. Get cleaned up and we'll all go over. Journee will scare her too much to throw anything, I'll mediate, and you'll get some damn information from her for once, okay?"
"You'd do that for me?"
"Jackson, you have to know by now there's not much I wouldn't do for you."
He peers up at me with innocent looking blue eyes and I know I'm being suckered by the Teller stare. For once, I let it slide.
"Get your shit together. I'm going to get Journee before she gets pissed and starts slicing up your clothes."
"What? I'm not even dating her. That's a girlfriend privilege."
"You tell her that when she's cleaning up your used prophylactics. Really Jax? Couldn't make it in a trashcan."
He shrugs. "Least I wrapped it up."
I roll my eyes and open the door, closing it firmly behind me.
Journee glances up from the bag of clothes. "He okay?" Her voice is softer.
"Yes. Didn't realize we were playing good cop, bad cop here."
She shrugs. "He needs tough love, but a soft touch. I figured it was the best way to go."
"Told him to get cleaned up. We're heading over to Wendy's to get the skinny on her pregnancy. It's been too long since any of us heard from her."
"Little bitch," Journee hisses.
I shake my head and smile. "Calm down there Lil Happy."
"I look like I have smiley faces all over my groin near my Whoohaa?"
"I think he'd like to give them to you there."
"Oh, not you too." She huffs.
"Wait someone else thinks Happy wants in your cookie jar?"
"Fucking G-Momster always has something sly to say. Never to his face of course. I think deep down she's scared of him."
"Um, you're one of the few who isn't," I say honestly. The silent Son can be unnerving.
"Meh," She tosses a thong into the bag. "Bitches just be leaving their draws and shit trying to mark non existent territory. Stupid."
I join her and we get the room into working order by the time Jax appears in the towel.
"You sober sally yet?" Journee asks.
He nods looking a little green around the gills.
"I'll get you coffee," Journee says as she grabs the bag of laundry and hurries out. Probably going to sneak some time in with Chibs. I hadn't missed his look of longing when she waved at him and continued past him at the bar.
"Can I trust you by yourself while I take this dishes out?" I ask.
"Yeah, Harley, I'm done adding to the problem at the moment," he mumbles.
I want to help him, but it's a mess he has to sort out himself. I walk to him and place my hand on his shoulder. "Hey, it's going to be okay. You're not alone in this." I squeeze.
"Thanks, Lee."
"Anytime, Babe." I say placing a kiss on his cheek. I grab the pile of dishes I've gathered off the night stand and slowly make my way to the kitchen sink.
"Go get her Lil Happy," I say as Jax and I step back and let Journee knock on the door.
She shoves her hand into her oversized hoodie and waits. I can see Wendy peek out the window.
Journee points two fingers to her eyes and back at Wendy. A few moments later the lock turns and the door opens.
"Before you open your pie hole and start spewing crazy everywhere...We're here to talk not fight. Jax deserves to at least know how far along you are and how the baby is doing. So you, Jax, and Lee are going to sit down and talk like civilized folks, understand?" She says quietly. It's that calm that's frightening. Her kind of anger is a slow burn.
Wendy nods.
"Excellent, everyone inside. Its no one else's business what we have going on here." Journee opens the door and we all walk behind her. I can see the rounded frame beneath Wendy's tank.
"How are you, Wendy?" I ask politely.
"Good," she whispers.
"Do you want to sit on the couch?"
"That'd be good," she says. Her face is pinched and her tone borders on rude. I take it all in stride. This is about Jax and the baby, nothing else matters.
I sit beside her on the couch and Jax sits on a chair opposite her. Journee chooses to lean against the wall.
"How far along are you?" Jax asks.
"Four months." Wendy sounds like the words are physically hurting her.
"And the baby is okay?" He says.
"Now you care?" she snarls.
"I always cared."
"It's fine, we're fine. Can you go now?"
I grit my teeth.
Journee clears her throat and Wendy sinks back into the couch.
"It doesn't have to be this way," Jax says softly.
"Have you changed your mind?" she asks with bright eyes full of hope.
"No."
"Then it stands."
"We need to work something else out," Jax insists.
"I'll keep you updated. It's the best I can do."
"Won't you be finding out the sex soon?" I say.
"At the end of the month," Wendy whispers.
"I want to be there for that."
"Okay," she says so insincerely it makes my teeth hurt.
"I'm not doing this with you." Jax sighs.
"How about we stay calm? This isn't good for baby Teller," I remind them.
"I was fine until the three of you showed up."
"You saying you don't like our presence?" Journee asks. Her overly wide eyes dare Wendy to say more.
"It's upsetting," She half whines.
I cringe. The woman needs a wake up call.
"This is about what's best for the baby, right?" I ask, coaxing her, the way I would a small child.
"Yes, I love my baby," she says rubbing her belly.
"We're going to make these visits a regular thing. Once a week. We'll plan ahead, but if you dodge us...I'm going to let J find you. I don't think you want that."
"No." Wendy answersm she's not completely stupid.
"You sure? I'm good at finding people," Journee says playing up her roll.
I glance down to hide my smile. We've done this routine a million times. Sometimes I'm the bad cop and she's the good cop.
"I can do once a week," Wendy agrees.
"Good, we'll be leaving now. If you need anything call Jax, Gemma or me, please."
Wendy nods. I'm not sure if she's listening, but she's not throwing shit, so there's progress.
"We're going to go now." I stand.
Jax follows my lead reluctantly and Journee pushes away from the wall. We leave and the oppressive cloud surrounding us lifts. It's going to be a long ass five months.
