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We don't own the bikes, brothers, or any "related" Sons of Anarchy, trust us, if we did we wouldn't have the time to write. No money is being made from our stories. So, please don't sue. It'd be a fruitless endeavor indeed. That being said, Harley, Journee, and any other newbies are ours, and we don't share. :Whispers in creepy voice: "My precious."
The universe
This reality is a mix of cannon, and our own ideas. We strive to keep the boys cannon, but since we will be shifting around some of the events, that will reflect in our writing and their personalities as well. It's our goal to provide you with quality fiction, and solid, fleshed out OFC.
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A/N:
Can I just say we love our readers. I know sometimes life throws off our posting schedules. ( stupid adulating) But you guys continue to stand by us and review. Believe us ; nothing makes going without sleep to get out another chapter of Mo worth it like reviews. As a writer, it can be a challenge for Telford juggle large word counts, edits, marketing, and book signings, with Mo Astor, but both of us are crazy committed to continuing to produce quality work on this story.
Mo Astor Chapter 27
Jax
I study the girls through the glass sliding doors while I smoke. When Ma has this many people over she prefers when we take it outside other wise the house looks too damn foggy to move. It feels good having everyone under one roof. Things weren't the same with J gone. Not when I'm trying to keep volcano Wendy from erupting, and she damn near did. Our talk in the car helped me clear my head and see things from her point of view. Having children is a huge deal. I'll be dealing with Wendy for at least eighteen years, and my relationship with Lee is new. She needs reassurance, and I need to figure out exactly what fatherhood and us together are going to look like moving forward.
Wendy's meltdown convinced me of that. She needs guidelines and structure, or she veers off into the wrong lane and starts making up her own scenarios. I can see now that until I outed our relationship at the wedding, she thought we stood a chance of getting back together. It's my fault. We've always broken up and made up. It was like I lived for that, this almost desperate need she had for approval and belonging. It made me feel like I was in control and wanted. After the shit storm that hit my life at fifteen, I needed it. Losing my brother, my father, and being blatantly rejected by my high school sweetheart Tara back to back, broke something inside me.
I got self-involved, greedy, and disconnected. Opening my eyes and seeing what I had in front of me with Lee, and seeing Chibs and Journee do it the right way began an awakening. I'd grown to think maybe relationships in this life were bullshit at best, and dangerous at worst. My mother was never the same after losing my father. It was like something had been siphoned from her spirit. I didn't want that. Then I watched Chibs with my sister. They bring out the best in each other. She never tries to make him change , and he soothes her fears.
"Something on yer mind Jackie boy?" Chibs asks.
I shake my head. "Feeling lucky actually."
"As ye should. Those women in there are top notch. The kind ye could search the world over and never find, so I suggest you make sure you got your head on right."
I glance at Chibs. He has a way of talking to you instead of at you, so when he says something that definite, I'm more prone to listen.
"What do you mean?"
"Seen you self-destruct one too many times. You screw up with this girl, and you'll be kicking yourself in the arse for the rest of yer life."
"I'm not going to."
"Hmmm."
I narrow my gaze and take a long draw. It's clear he has more to say, but he won't unless he's invited to.
"What was the hmm for."
"I believe you won't do it on purpose."
"I know Lee better than damn near anyone."
"Yeah as a friend."
I turn my body toward him and frown. "And that's so different?"
"Aye lad, and you'd best learn that quickly."
"Enlighten me, wise man."
He snickers. "Since you asked so nicely. I reckon I will."
I smirk.
Chibs has always gotten me. I was drawn toward him since my father died. Clay has never been what you'd call the fatherly type. We've come to an understanding over time, but we'd never be close. If I'm honest, a part of me resents how quickly he slipped in after my old man's death. Had he been waiting in the wings the entire time for an opening? I never dared to ask him or her. I love my mom, but she has some shadiness going. I like to believe he was a rebound or a distraction to help her keep it together.
She took Tommy's death harder than anyone. Thank God for Sugar getting arrested and Baby J coming to live with us. It helped her focus her obsession onto someone else. It's how J wound up with our last name tacked on to hers. Mom went all out, and we let her because it lifted her from the severe depression she landed in. People think she's hell on wheels now, but they have no clue how bad it can get.
"You're both figuring things out. You can't expect her to read your mind or "get it." You ain't the best communicator Jackie boy. That's got to change."
"I think I do alright." I shrug.
"Got to step up your game. You've got a lot of juggling to do between Wendy, the baby, and Lee."
"I know. I have been thinking about that." I admit with a sigh.
"Maybe you aren't as hopeless as I thought," he mumbles.
"Ouch."
"You've been living on planet Jackie, population of one for a long time now. Changing isn't the easy thing for men like us. We don't have to try with women. They throw themselves at our feet. Sure ye were serious with Wendy, but yew didn't respect her. Not really."
I nod my head. He's right.
"I didn't have to."
"Exactly. You pull any of that crap with Lee, and she and Mo Astor will have your balls on a platter."
I shudder. "You aren't wrong."
"How are you going to handle this Wendy mess?"
"I don't know. I'm not trying to force Lee into making huge decisions. She's never operated that way. But boundaries and respect need to be established. I'm walking through a field of landmines and trying not to be blown up."
"What are yew expecting to do once the babe comes?"
I shake my head. "No clue."
"Best be figuring it out. They don't stay in utero forever."
"I plan on having a calm talk about it this week with Wendy."
Chibs chuckles. "Good luck with that."
"You're all heart, brother."
"Just enjoying seeing ye brought down to reality with the rest of us."
I scowl as we continue to smoke.
"You think I'm asking too much of Lee too soon? A baby is a lot of work, and Wendy is just this side of sane."
"The lass knew what she was walking into. Seems to me like she doesn't mind."
"Guess that's true."
"If you're really worried you should ask her."
"Feels too soon. I need to make sure we're solid first. I freaked her out when I left to think. Not sure why…she knows how I operate."
"Aye, but she's not just yer friend anymore. Make sure you let her know ya went to clear yer head, not escape her or leave her out of the loop. As tough as she is, love makes you vulnerable."
The door opens, and Tig and Clay join us ending our heart to heart.
I have some work to do.
I follow Lee up the driveway.
"It was good seeing everyone wasn't it?" She asks.
"Yeah, it's been a minute since we had a family dinner like that."
"Which is why Mama was chomping at the bit to get us all in one place. It's weird, now that you mention it, things have been slipping on the family front," Lee says as she unlocks the front door to her house.
"That's because Clay couldn't give a shit. He humors my mom, but I don't get the feeling we give him the warm and fuzzies. Hell, J and I couldn't get out of that house fast enough. You remember. You guys moved in with me as soon as I got my own place until you started college."
"Yeah. It was so different from when JT was alive."
"That's an understatement." I don't mind talking about my dad to certain people.
We step inside, and I think about Chibs' words.
"So, I wanted to talk to you..."
She tenses.
"It's nothing bad."
"You don't do talks, Jax."
"Which is why I need to start. When I left after Wendy, it wasn't about you. It was about the situation. I needed time to think about what happened and how to handle it. I've never seen Wendy like that. She's always such a push over. Realizing that her state of mind and well-being affect my kid now and in the future, shook me. I need to figure out what the hell life with a kid is going to look like. I'm not big on talking until I'm ready. You know that, but I forgot that being together places us in new territory. I know you don't like leaving things up in the air. You like everything to be neat, tidy and wrapped with a bow. But I'm messy, babe. I like to sort the shit show out in my head before I share."
Her eyes widen. "Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I could see the worry in your eyes and I knew I put it there. It wasn't my intention. I'm impulsive as hell. This is a thing we both know. But I don't want that to affect you—."
Her scowl stops me in mid-sentence.
"I don't need you to baby me because my father wrecked me with his bullshit. I know –
"Whoa. No one said that, Harley."
She turns away from me and folds her arms over her chest. "Like you had to."
"What the hell?" I grab her arm and spin her around.
"I don't need you to feel sorry for me."
"I don't."
"Right. Poor little Lee never got enough love, and now she freaks out when people pull away."
"Is that what happened?"
"We went through something major, and you were out the door what was I supposed to think?"
"That I'm trying to deal with a lot of shit. I've never been a father before Lee. I don't know the first thing about shared custody or who has rights. Wendy is not reliable, and I'm afraid to set her off. I know stress isn't good for pregnant women and honestly, I'm worried she'll have a relapse."
"Selfish Bitch."
"It's a disease, and she's got it bad. I'm all but shoving her to the edge right now, ending our relationship as soon as she finds out she's pregnant and starting a relationship with the one woman she felt most insecure around on top of all the cheating, and lies. She's not stupid. She turned a blind eye because all that mattered to her was that I came home to her and claimed her."
"Jesus."
"She's like all of us looking for a place to belong. I lied when I told her that place would be beside me and she's reeling." The shame creeps up inside me. I did a number on my ex-fiancée, and we'll all be paying the price for that.
"So what Jackson? Are you saying want to end things?"
"Jesus, no Lee. I'm trying to find a way for us to all get along and work together to raise this child, cause you aren't going anywhere and neither is she."
"Jax…"
"No, I'm putting this all out there before it has a chance to blow up on either of us. I been doing a lot of thinking. I'm going to try to smooth things over with her and come up with a middle ground."
"She wants you back," Lee whispers.
"She never had me." I place my fingers under her chin and force her to meet my gaze.
"You don't have anything to be worried about. Whatever tantrums she throws or blow back she tries to send our way falls on me. I'll handle it. Do you understand me?"
She nods.
"I don't want to be the reason you have issues with your child."
"That bitch doesn't have enough power to make that happen. It's going to be a rocky ride for a minute here, but it'll smooth out." I meet her too bright eyes. "You believe me?"
"It's not you I'm worried about," She whispers.
"No worrying. We'll deal with things as they come."
She sighs, dropping her folded arms as the tension leaves her body. "Alright."
I mentally rejoice. She can get stuck on things and keep re-examining them on some sort of crazed loop. I have a cure for that. A delicious distraction we'll both enjoy.
"Speaking of taking things as they come."
She shakes her head and giggles. "Really?"
I cup the back of her neck and bring her lips to mine. Her laughter turns to moans as her body molds to mine, and I use my other hand to palm the curve of her ass. She tilts her head and wraps her arms around my neck, and I know I got her. I slide my hand down her back, cup the opposite cheek and lift her up. Her legs wrap around my waist and her warm center searing me through our layers of clothes have me rock hard. She rocks against the bulge forming in my pants, and I grunt. Our tongues tangle, and I make my way to the bedroom. I stumble through the doorway, desperate for skin to skin contacts. We tear at each others' clothes as the urgency hits. I need to be surrounded inside her where only I'm allowed.
Our lips war as teeth clank, tongues duel and lips suck and nibble. We manage to strip each other bare and move to the bed. I reach between us to check her center. Slick with a swollen clit, she's ready for me. I swallow her moan. Right now everything she has to give belongs to me.
"You're so ready for me." I grip her hips and drive home. She cries out, arching off the bed as her legs grip my hips. Her nails down my back have me pounding into her wetness.
"Harder." She gives back what I give. The head board knocks against the wall as I bottom out, going deeper with every stroke. I clench the sheets and grit my teeth as she flexes her muscles. It's a battlefield. A safe place to burn off all our frustrations. My heart pounds in my chest and my cock is granite. I grit my teeth as she tightens around me, shuddering as she finds her own release. I follow swiftly behind, spending myself inside her body. I rest my head on her chest as I keep my weight balanced on my forearms.
The only sound in the dark room is our ragged breathing as we allow the afterglow to fill the space, chase away the doubt and worry, and cocoon us like a warm blanket.
