Notes:

WOW hey everyone, this updating schedule i g. I know it's good since it'll make the story last longer but a week feels like FOREVER. That's gonna suck for you when we get to the cliffhangers,,,

Anywhoooo, we get to see Pepper's reaction today! Tony's still a jerk but we been knew. He'll get better eventually...maybe😇 Gotta wait for the character development! Have fun and stay safe❤ 💛💚💙💜


Chapter Two: The Quest for Nuggets

The drive to the mansion takes all of ten minutes, but that's without traffic or a toddler kicking the back of your seat. So to Tony, it feels like an eternity. Peter kicks Tony's seat in front of him as he absentmindedly sings.

"Ol' McDonald had a farm, E, I, E, I, O. And on dat farm he hadda cow, E, I, E, I, O. With a moo moo here and a moo moo there, here a moo there a moo, eberywhere a moo moo," Peter continues to sing, only adding to Tony's oncoming headache. Tony drums his thumbs on the steering wheel impatiently. He wants nothing more than to turn the radio on to drown out the kid's singing, but he doesn't want to deal with waterworks either. "Tomy, don't you wanna sing with me?" Peter asks without stalling his kicks.

"No thank you," Tony politely answers. He doesn't want to get frustrated so soon. It's just a few months, it's just a few months, he repeats in his head to keep himself sane.

"How come?" Peter asks, obviously disappointed.

"I'm not a singer." Tony leaves it at that and hopes that the answer is satisfactory enough. Of course, it isn't for Peter.

"Eberybody can sing, Tomy. You just gotta try. I can sing with you!" Peter offers with a wide smile. Tony sighs and rubs his temple with his free hand.

"No, Peter," he reiterates. Obadiah stays silent in the passenger seat, typing on his phone as Tony tries to keep the kid in check. Peter lowers his head sadly, which Tony can see him do in the rearview mirror, and continues to swing his feet back and forth. Tony's stomach immediately twists with guilt, but he decides saying nothing would be the best choice. They sit in silence until Peter speaks up again.

"Tomy?" he calls quietly.

"Yeah?" Tony just has to stay patient and eventually the kid will stop talking, right? Is that how kids work?

"Are we getting chicken nuggets?" Peter glances back up, looking hopeful.

"Uh, sure. We'll order some at the mansion," Tony agrees noncommittally, but he just says it to keep Peter from asking again. Instead, he gets an unexpected reaction in the form of Peter's wide eyes.

"We're gonna be in a mansion?!" Peter squeals with excitement, causing both Obadiah and Tony to jump. The car swerves slightly before Tony recovers.

"What the f-" He quickly composes himself and takes a slow breath. "Peter, let's use our indoor voice, okay?" he says, his voice tight and firm. Peter's smile immediately drops at Tony's tone. He interlocks his fingers and places his hands on his lap.

"Sorry, Tomy," he quietly apologizes with a wobbly voice. No, Tony can't deal with tears. He definitely can't deal with tears.

"Hey, it's okay. We just wanna stay safe, right? Remember what I said?" he tries again. This time, his approach is much softer. Peter sniffs, but no tears fall, and he nods.

"Be careful," he repeats.

"Good," Tony praises, turning his attention back to the road. He notices Obadiah giving him a side glance, then looks to his phone again. Peter stays quiet for the rest of the ride.

When they arrive at the massive, cliffside mansion, Peter has his face pressed against the window in mere seconds. His breath fogs up the glass and his hands create smear marks as he steadies himself.

"Look! It's like, like a castle! I read about those in my books! That's where da princesses are! Are we gonna meet a princess? Or a dragon?! Dragons are always by da castles!" he exclaims. Tony glances between Peter and the road, anxious about both the kid flying out the window and getting slobber all over his pristine window. "And there's da beach!" Peter yells, even more excited. Finally, they drive down the driveway ramp to the garage where Tony no longer has to worry about legality.

"We're in way over our heads," Tony mutters, the anxiety seeping into his voice.

"Relax. I've never lead you astray, right? It's going to go fi-" Before Obadiah can say the word "fine," Tony frustratedly interrupts him.

"No, Obi, it's not. I can't do this. This isn't-" Obadiah is the one to interrupt Tony this time.

"Oh yeah? You're going to what? Drive all the way back to the agency and give him back? Imagine the headlines when the press hears about that," Obadiah challenges, undoubtedly making a good point. Now that everything is finalized, Tony is unfortunately at an impasse. He rakes his hands through his hair.

"You wanna…gib me back?" Tony whips around to face the kid. Peter looks caught between being confused and tearing up. Shit, what do I do? Tony frantically thinks.

"Of course not, Squirt," Obadiah effectively assures instead. "Tony wouldn't do anything like that, right?" He looks to Tony with a knowing smile.

"Not at all," Tony confirms. He just hopes he isn't going to regret his words. Obadiah's smile widens and he claps his hands together.

"Alright then! Ready to head in?" Peter nods his head enthusiastically and tries to pull on his door, even though it's locked.

"Hold on," Tony orders gently before stepping out of the car. He unlocks all the doors and holds Peter's open so the kid can hop to the ground.

"Where're we going?" Peter asks curiously as he takes the nearest grown up's hand out of instinct, which happens to be Tony's. The man doesn't think he'll ever get used to that.

"Well, we're going up. We ride the elevator to the main floor past the workshop," Tony explains, leading them towards the elevator.

"Woah, you work at your home?" Peter questions in awe.

"Sometimes." Tony decides to leave it at that. He doesn't want to get into a conversation with a four-year-old about how he runs a weapons company. "Hey, J.A.R.V.I.S.," he greets the AI casually.

"Good afternoon, Sir. Would you like me to alert Ms. Potts that you have arrived? She has been looking for you." Peter looks around for the disembodied voice, his eyes wide.

"Nah, we'll surprise her. No one yells like Pepper does," Tony quips. When they reach the elevator, however, Peter pulls back on Tony's hand. Peter is nowhere near strong enough to stop Tony, but it's enough to get Tony's attention. Tony turns around and raises an eyebrow at the kid. "What's wrong?"

"What's that?" Peter stares at the open elevator, still trying to pull Tony away from it.

"That's an elevator… You've never seen one?" Peter shakes his head. "Ever rode in one?" Peter shakes his head again. "Great. Uh, I promise it's not scary. Alright? First time for everything. C'mon, we've got things to do." Tony walks straight into the elevator without the intent to stop.

"No! No I don't wanna! No!" Regardless of Peter's effort to stop him, they both end up in the elevator. When Obadiah gets in after them, the doors shut and he presses the up arrow on the control panel. Both men are oblivious to Peter's sudden panic as soon as the elevator begins to move. Peter immediately wraps his arms around Tony's leg, tightening his small fists and burying his face in the fabric. Tony just lets the toddler do his thing, unsure of what he should do in the awkward situation. He doesn't think anything of it until he notices the quick, hot breaths on his leg a few seconds later.

"You good, Peter?" he double checks. He doesn't start to panic until he doesn't get a response. "Peter," he says more forcefully. Peter only shakes his head and holds on tighter to the pant leg. "Obi." Tony urgently hits Obadiah's shoulder to get his attention and kneels down to Peter's level.

"Hm?" Obadiah responds, pocketing his phone.

"Talk to me. What's going on?" Tony whispers to Peter.

"No no no no," is all the boy says back as tears stream down his face. They were so close to being home without tears.

"He's probably claustrophobic. Maybe he just doesn't like elevators," Obadiah offers, perfectly calm. When the elevator doors open, Tony quickly gets the kid out so he has more breathing room. Peter instantly latches onto Tony's arm, them being the same height with Tony crouched.

"Better?" Tony asks, his throat dry.

"Don' like elebators." Peter starts to shake his head over and over. Tony hesitantly puts his hand on the top of Peter's head to get him to stop.

"Okay, alright, no more elevators. I promise," he reassures. Somehow the kid went from ecstatic to distraught in a matter of seconds, and now he won't let go. It's almost too much for Tony to follow.

"I'll go fill Pepper in, you order Peter some food. Kids need food to live, just so you know," Obadiah jokes as he exits the living room.

"Never woulda guessed!" Tony calls after him. "How's that sound, huh? Ya hungry?" Peter sniffs before removing his face from Tony's shoulder. His eyes are damp and bloodshot, but he nods.

"Chicken nuggets?" he mumbles. Tony immediately nods. Anything to get the kid to stop crying. If he's eating, he can't cry.

"Chicken nuggets." At Tony's confirmation, Peter wipes the tears from his eyes with his fists. "Do you still take naps?" Tony asks hopefully. An hour or two of peace and quiet would be amazing. Luckily, Peter nods.

"When da clock dings two times." Tony quickly looks at his watch and pales when he sees that it's almost 3:15. Way past nap time.

"That's okay. How about after food, we get you in a warm bed?" Tony offers. I can't believe this is happening. Please tell me this is a nightmare.

"M'kay," Peter thankfully agrees. Now, Tony just has to order in the food and they'll be good to go.

"What do you mean it's alive?!" The sound of Pepper yelling is enough to make Tony's stomach drop. This isn't going to go well. Her voice and the clacking of her heels get louder as she walks towards the living room. "Tony has enough to focus on without having to take care of a dog or a cat or a-" She stops dead in her tracks when her eyes land on Peter. "Oh my god, there's a kid," she states in disbelief. The whole room goes silent. "This is a joke. Tell me this is a joke right now, Tony." Peter stares with wonder at the new woman as he holds onto Tony's pant leg. Tony, however, knows he's about to get his ass handed to him.

"Pepper, this is Peter," Tony introduces, not taking his eyes off her. Peter immediately looks up at Tony.

"Big names or little names?" the boy asks just in case.

"Little names," Tony stiffly approves. Peter waves and greets the woman saying,

"Hi, Miss Peppa." Pepper's face softens slightly. She looks between Peter and Tony, not quite sure whether to explode or hold her tongue. The silence continues with Pepper obviously fuming. She wants to chew Tony out, to scream and yell. But she chooses not to. She holds her tongue like she has for many years. She'll tear into him later, though, when Peter isn't around to hear it.

"Hi there, Peter," Pepper finally says. She walks forward and kneels in front of Peter with a comforting smile. He smiles back, albeit hesitantly as he hides behind Tony's leg. "You're more than welcome to call me Pepper. It's good to meet you. Are you hungry?"

"Tomy says we can get chicken nuggets," Peter answers while nodding.

"Of course we can. How about we go out to get them?" Pepper offers, eliciting more nods of affirmation from the boy. She stands, making intense eye contact with Tony. "And we're also going to do some shopping, since Peter needs things like food and clothes and toys," she emphasizes all the things she knows Tony hasn't considered.

"And books!" Peter chimes in.

"And books," Pepper agrees. She gives Tony a look that says they'll be talking about this later.

"Right, right. We should go do that," Tony also agrees and clears his throat. The last thing he wants to do is go shopping, but he can't get out of it now.

"His suitcase is in his new room," Obadiah cuts in. "You two have fun with that. I have some business to take care of." He pockets phone and walks past them to get back to the elevator.

"Wait, where are you going?" Tony quickly questions. They were all supposed to do this together. He doesn't want to spend all of his time watching over a toddler when he could be getting work done or out having a good time. It starts to kick in that maybe adopting a kid for PR wasn't the greatest idea.

"To work," Obadiah answers bluntly. "I didn't adopt him, you did. Your signature. With you two slackers out for the day, I have a company to run. Have fun, my phone's on if you need anything." He walks inside and waits for the elevator doors to close. "Oh and be sure to let me know where you're going." He winks, then leaves back down the elevator. Tony immediately knows what he means: Obadiah wants to tip off the paparazzi ahead of time so that people see him with the kid.

"Do you have a jacket in your suitcase?" Pepper asks Peter, ignoring Obadiah's disappearance.

"I do! And rain boots! They're new! I got them with Miss Manda!" Peter exclaims, happy to share the information with the two grown ups. Tony narrows his eyes in confusion.

"But it's not rai-"

"I'd love to see your new rain boots," Pepper indulges with a sweet smile, quick to cut off Tony. Peter grins before grabbing onto Pepper's hand and happily yelling,

"Let's go!" Pepper laughs softly and leads him to his new room. When she opens the guest room door, which is apparently no longer going to be the guest room, it looks identical to what it had looked like prior. The only difference is that there's now a small backpack and suitcase placed on the bed. Peter quickly runs over to his suitcase and starts throwing out clothes in search for his jacket and rain boots.

"You brag about having all this money but don't redecorate his room? At all?" Pepper harshly whispers to Tony, who meanders behind.

"It wasn't exactly well planned, alright?" Tony mutters back at her.

"Not planned?!" Pepper seethes as quietly as she can. "Men are clueless," she huffs angrily, but makes sure she's smiling by the time Peter comes running back over.

"See! Look!" Peter holds up his rain boots that have black and yellow stripes, two large eyes on the toes, antennas sticking out behind the eyes, and small wings jutting out at the ankles. Bee rain boots. The epitome of cuteness. Pepper's heart practically melts, while Tony tries to hide his horror at the inevitable fashion disaster. He's just a kid, he's just a kid, he doesn't know any better, Tony repeats in his head to calm himself down.

"Those are perfect, Peter," Pepper compliments. "Get a jacket and then we can go." Peter does as he's told and quickly picks out a jacket, then sits on the floor to put on his boots.

"Do you need help putting those on?" Tony awkwardly offers as he holds his hands tightly clasped in front of him.

"Nope! Imma big boy," Peter assures. He struggles slightly to pull the left rain boot over his heel, but eventually slips it on. Once he has both on, he hops to his feet and rushes back over to Pepper. "I'm ready!"

"You are! Time to go," Pepper matches his enthusiastic energy.

"Wait! Can I bring my Captain Mamerica books?!" Peter's request causes Tony to grimace. Of course he likes Captain America. Who else would he like?

"Of course," Pepper allows before Tony can decline.

"Even frozen at the bottom of the North Atlantic Ocean, everyone prefers that popsicle over me," Tony grumbles, earning himself an elbow to the ribs from Pepper.

After Peter gathers his comic books, the three of them walk into the main room again, but the kid stops in front of the elevator. Pepper is much more perceptive of Peter's hesitance and turns around to see the look of fear on the boy's face. "Are you okay?" Pepper asks, kneeling to his level.

"I don't like 'em. They, they make weird noises and, and they, then they do this thing where they make my tummy feel funny," Peter mumbles, looking down. Seeing the boy sad makes Pepper sigh, but she maintains her slight smile.

"Hey," she taps his chin so he looks up, "then we can use the stairs."

"Really?" Peter asks, hopeful.

"Really." Pepper pinches his rosy cheek lightly, making him smile. Then she lightly touches his sides, which causes him to burst out in a fit of giggles.

"No tickles! No tickles! Stop!" Peter manages to squeal between laughter. Tony stares at the two at a loss for words. He has no idea how Pepper is so good with Peter or how he'll ever make Peter laugh like that. He just has to…fake being good with kids. Yeah, fake it until you make it. Let the paparazzi see him being good with Peter and all their problems will be solved. Simple.

After a few more seconds of tickling, Pepper stops to let Peter catch his breath. Peter gasps, his smile still lingering.

"Ready to go down the stairs?" Pepper asks and Peter nods. "Alright, hold my hand, please." Peter does as he's told and they walk down the stairwell, past the workshop, and to the garage.

"How come you hab a waterfall inside?" Peter asks curiously as they walk to the car.

"Because it's pretty," Pepper answers patiently. "And because Tony has more money than he knows what to do with," she says in a quieter tone, more so for Tony to hear. Tony doesn't contribute to the conversation.

"Why'd that room have glass walls?" Peter points back towards the workshop. "Walls aren't supposed ta be see through."

"Sound can't get through, so it's super quiet. Not many people go down there, anyways," Pepper responds again. She looks back at Tony with hard eyes due to his silence. Tony looks away with a disinterested sniff. If Pepper wants to do all the hard work, then he isn't going to object.

"Why does Tomy need bunches of cars?" Peter stares at all the different makes and models of cars, mesmerized by them all.

"He doesn't really need them."

"Then why'd he get 'em all if he doesn't need 'em? Does he dribe them all? He can't dribe that many cars. Why did he do that?" Pepper opens the car door and, when she doesn't see so much as a booster seat, she stares back at Tony in disbelief.

"Because sometimes he doesn't use his brain," Pepper answers as nicely as possible. Peter giggles, somehow finding Pepper's comment funny.

"Uh oh, Tomy's in trouble," he says in a sing-song voice.

"When am I not?" Tony counters with a shrug of his shoulders.

"How about I sit in the back with you?" Pepper offers Peter, trying to keep her tone upbeat.

"M'kay!" Peter instantly agrees and climbs into the backseat. Pepper turns her pointed gaze on Tony again.

"You and I will be having words tonight," she promises. After she gets in, Tony rolls his eyes and mutters,

"Oh joy." He begrudgingly gets in the driver's seat and resists the urge to slam the door shut behind him.

Tony had thought that Peter singing "Old McDonald" in the car was a torturous experience, but it's nothing compared to both Pepper and Peter singing "The Wheels on the Bus." It feels like the tone deaf singing goes on forever until they fast food joint to pick up some chicken nuggets. Tony never enjoyed silence so much than the moment Peter stopped singing to eat.

"Where to now?" Tony questions Pepper as he pulls out of the drive-through.

"Goodwill," Pepper responds curtly. Tony snorts, glancing back at her through the rearview mirror.

"Excuse me?" he chuckles. "Sorry, I could've sworn you just said Goodwill. Last time I checked, that place sells other people's garbage." Pepper takes a deep breath.

"I suggest you think twice about testing me right now." She keeps her tone light as to not upset Peter.

"Billionaires become billionaires so that they don't have to shop at places like Goodwill," Tony states under his breath with disgust. Still, he unfortunately drives to the nearest Goodwill, which is too close for his comfort. Pepper gets out of the car first to make sure Peter gets out okay, then the three of them head inside.

"Tomy," a small voice calls. Tony looks down to see Peter reaching for his hand to hold. "We gotta hold hands around strangers. It's not safe." Tony glances up to Pepper, who raises both her eyebrows expectantly, then looks back to Peter.

"Thanks, but it'll be fine," he reassures lamely. Pepper shakes her head and starts walking towards the racks of clothing. "So, what kinda junk are we lookin' for? Hand-me-downs? Two year old juicer? Blanket with questionable stains?" Tony walks down a row of kids clothing, unimpressed. What kind of business can legally sell pre-owned items? There has to be some kind of sanitary law preventing it.

"I already told you. Clothes, toys, and books," Pepper repeats as she searches through the clothing racks. She stops when Peter gently taps her leg.

"Can I go look at toys? Please?" he asks, pointing towards the section of the store devoted to kids toys.

"Yeah, just stay where I can see you."

"Thanks, Peppa!" With that, he runs towards the toys and plops down on the carpet to play with them. As Pepper continues to search for clothes, Tony pulls out his phone to text Obadiah the address of where they're at.

"Are you going to get off your phone and help me pick out clothes for your kid?" Pepper questions impatiently without looking up from her task. Tony frowns disapprovingly at her phrasing.

"Don't put it like that."

"Like what, Tony? That truth? You can be so dense for being labeled a genius. You've done some pretty reckless things, but this is way out of line." She laughs humorlessly, almost as if she doesn't believe what's happening herself. Before Tony can retort, she pulls a sweater off the rack and thrusts it into his arms. "Hold this," she orders. Tony looks at the red, knitted sweater up and down and tries not to show his disgust.

"Lordy, what on Earth is this? It should be illegal. I think I saw a poodle in Beverly Hills wearing this," he comments distastefully. Pepper ignores his complaints and continues her search.

They spend around twenty minutes searching through the store for enough clothes, books, and toys to keep Peter content for a while. Pepper even finds a couple books on parenting and child development, which she's forcing Tony to get. When Tony notices the slightly dinghy toys that Peter picks out with a wide smile, he raises an eyebrow.

"Why am I buying these crappy, second hand toys when I can ship high end ones to the house?"he murmurs to Pepper.

"Trust me," she assures, "you could get a toddler a million dollars worth of toys and they'd still play with a cardboard box and bubble wrap." Tony isn't sure he understands, but he doesn't care enough to put everything back or be on the phone with toy companies all day. Kids are too high maintenance.

"Tomy?" There's a tug on Tony's pant leg. He looks down at Peter and raises an eyebrow. "Is it nap time yet?" Shit, Tony mentally berates himself, I forgot about the nap.

"Almost. We'll go home after this and then you can sleep." What else is he supposed to say? It's not like he can make the checkout line move any faster.

"Tomy," Peter whines and stomps his feet a few times.

"Hey," Tony scolds. "None of that. I said we'd be home soon." He needs to have a firm hand otherwise kids won't listen, right? Yeah, that sounds about right. Instead, it has the opposite of the desired effect and Peter's eyes begin to glisten. "Pepper," Tony calls, unsurely. Pepper turns around and notices that Peter is on the verge of tears, but her arms are full of clothes and books.

"Comfort him," she orders like it's the most obvious thing in the world. To others, it might be. To Tony, it couldn't be more convoluted.

"How?!" he asks in disbelief. Tears fall from Peter's eyes and he raises his arms up towards Tony, his hands opening and closing. Tony knows what the boy wants, but he doesn't want to acknowledge it.

"For once in your life, put your ego second and pick him up," Pepper whispers, quickly losing her patience. Tony looks up at the ceiling and grinds his teeth together. Even though he wants to ignore the kid's grabby hands, he grabs Peter underneath his arms and hoists him onto his hip. Without hesitation, Peter wraps his arms around Tony's neck and lays his head down on Tony's shoulder. Tony tries to avert his gaze away from Peter at all costs, even if that means catching Pepper's eye.

"Was that so difficult?" she asks smugly.

"Yes," Tony answers honestly. He doesn't want a kid hanging off him and giving him back pain. How could anyone ever want kids? They're life suckers, he notes in his head.

By the time Pepper gets checked out at the register, Peter is sound asleep on Tony's shoulder. Of course he had to fall asleep. Tony's arm is already starting to get pins and needles from awkwardly holding the four-year-old and he's pretty sure he can feel the drool starting to soak through his suit jacket.

"I can drive so that you don't have to put Peter down," Pepper offers with a sly smile. They walk to the doors of the store, which look like they haven't been washed in ages. Tony can hardly see through them.

"God no. Less time with this urchin on my shoulder, the better. We're gonna have to get the suit dry cleaned after this," he gripes, slowly adjusting his hold as to not wake up Peter. Pepper opens the door for them.

"Well, I think y-" Pepper is cut off by the sounds of shouting, clicking cameras, and shuffling feet. Tony instantly feels Peter jolt awake and watches his eyes squint to block out the flashing lights. Between the chaotic shouts and influx of sensory input, Pepper can't react and Tony is speechless. He didn't expect so many of them. Peter buries his head in the side of Tony's neck and grips the back of his suit jacket. The only thing Tony can do is make the best out of the situation, just like he and Obadiah planned.


Notes:

Tony might be in horror of Peter's fashion choice, but we all know RDJ would be so proud. Thank you for reading!❤ 💛💚💙💜

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