Chapter 45: Christmas Prank Gone Wrong

"I thought you loved me." Derek grumbles to his wife.

"I do love you."

"Then why are you driving in circles at the mall trying to find a parking place? Rather than coming home to see me? Your husband. Who loves and misses you," he whines.

Meredith laughs and replies, "Because, husband-of-mine, neither you nor I were successful at getting our sisters to shop for us. We have a houseful of loved ones coming over on Christmas Eve and we still need gifts for said loved ones."

"I know," he sighs dramatically and makes her laugh again. "I haven't kissed you in… well, so many hours, I can't remember."

"You're playing dirty."

"I always want to play dirty with you."

"Derek."

"Meredith. Come home, we'll go do the Christmas shopping on Tuesday, during the day. The stinking mall will be less crowded, and we can knock it out together."

She looks at the sea of cars and knows there will be a sea of people inside, as well. There's no question that she'd much rather be with Derek. "I'll see you soon," she tells him.

"Yes," he chortles triumphantly and makes her giggle. "Drive safely."

"I will," she answers and disconnects as she turns her car away from the mall and toward home.


When Meredith is almost home a short while later, she sees what looks like a glow coming from the direction of her house. She frowns and feels a twinge of nervousness - wondering what it could be. Once she rounds the final bend in the road, she puts her foot on the brake and stares in astonishment. Her house is - for lack of a better word - glowing.

With Christmas decorations.

Tons and tons of Christmas decorations. There are mechanical Santa's, reindeer, elves and lights galore. There's fake snow, and a huge blowup thing with Santa and a snowman inside.

"Mark," she growls with certainty as she finally pulls her car into the garage and turns off the ignition.

Derek is waiting for her in the kitchen with a huge grin on his face. Unwilling to squelch his happiness - Meredith swallows the nasty comment she was going to make.

"Hi Derek," she says instead and walks into his open arms for a hug and a kiss.

"Hi Mer," he replies. He starts rubbing her back and asks, "Was traffic bad?"

"Surprisingly, no. I guess all the cars and their people are at the mall."

He gives a small chuckle and asks, "Then why are you so tense?" He applies more massaging pressure to her back and causes her to groan in pleasure.

"No reason," she murmurs and leans up to kiss him. She kisses him slowly, runs her fingers through the curls of his hair and bites his bottom lip. He pulls her to him a little tighter and runs his fingers through the ends of her hair. She pulls back slightly and asks, "Now do you remember kissing me?"

"I remember everything about us," he chuckles huskily. "I just wanted to get you home."

"I'm glad I came home," she replies and goes back to kissing her husband.

"Wait," he says, feeling both of their bodies heating up. "Do you like the lights outside?"

She hesitates just a little too long before answering, "Of course."

"You're a horrible liar Meredith." Derek says, the slightest bit of hurt in his voice.

Meredith sighs and lays her head on his shoulder. "Derek," she starts, deciding to go with honesty, "I like the lights. It's all the other stuff Mark put out there that I," she hesitates, "umm… could do without."

"All what other stuff?" Derek asks, sounding a little edgy. "Mark and David were only supposed to put up lights."

"Oh," she answers, biting her bottom lip. Damn it, she doesn't want Derek to be mad at his best friend and brother-in-law at Christmas. Why couldn't she have kept her mouth shut?

"Mer? What other stuff?" he asks softly.

"I'm sure they put it up for the kids, Derek. It's really not so bad. I was just… surprised. That's all."

He leans down to kiss her again. Then states, "You're trying to be diplomatic - which makes me love you even more. I'd still like you to tell me what other stuff they put out there."

"Okay," she sighs heavily and pulls out of his arms. "Let me get us some wine first."

"That can't be good." he grumbles.

Meredith tells Derek all about their overly decorated house while they sip wine and have soup and salad for dinner. When she's finished, Derek says, "Fuck, I can't believe they did that."

"I can," she answers with a giggle. "Maybe it's not so bad, after all."

"Not so bad? You were tense and aggravated when you got home. It must be atrocious."

"Well," she giggles again, after drinking some more wine, "The astronauts can probably see it from space."

Derek gives a sound that sounds half pissed and half scared. Meredith laughs and moves from her spot at the table to stand in front of him. She tilts his head up to her and leans down to kiss him. He pulls her down so she's now straddling his lap. He deepens their kiss as she rotates her hips and feels him grow hard. She pulls off her sweater and her bra and places his hands on her breasts.

He grins and she giggles. Meredith is happy she put his mind - and body - back on them. And only them.


"Good morning, Meredith."

"Dr. Sloan," she answers coldly, only sparing him a tiny glance before closing her chart and turning to walk away.

Mark chuckles and follows her. "Dr. Sloan? You've been calling me Mark since you married my best friend. You must be mad at me."

"How perceptive of you," she snaps and keeps walking.

"Hey," Mark says as they stop to wait for the elevator. "I admit David and I thoroughly over-decorated your house but…."

"Over decorated?" Meredith asks in shock. "Is that what you call what you did? Decorating?"

"It was a bit overboard, but we really thought you and Derek would get a good laugh out of it," he shrugs.

They step on the elevator and Meredith says, "It looks like Santa's reindeer did a fly-by and took a crap all over our house."

Mark starts laughing but quickly stifles it as Meredith continues to glare at him. "What?"

The elevator doors slide open and Meredith stomps off with her anger in tow.

"Meredith?" Mark follows her. "Meredith, I don't understand…"

"You're an idiot!" she hisses angrily through gritted teeth.

A passing nurse tries to hide her laughter and Mark grabs Meredith's arm to pull her into an empty room. "It was just a j…"

"I know! It was just a joke," Meredith flails her arms, doing her best to keep her voice down. Even though she wants to scream at the man-child in front of her. "You know, maybe I could see the humor in what you guys did if either of you had let my husband in on the joke."

"Crap," Mark mutters, as the color drains from his face and comprehension dawns.

"Yeah, crap," she agrees as the urge to yell disappears. "What if Derek had gone out there after you and David left?"

"He didn't." Mark answers lamely.

"Thankfully," Meredith nods, "but you had no way of knowing he wouldn't. You guys put my husband in a dangerous situation and that scares me. It also pisses me off. So, for now, I'd appreciate it if you'd leave me alone."

"Okay, but Meredith, it wasn't intentional."

"I know. You weren't thinking," she says, and she blinks back tears. "I thought you, of all people, his best friend," she sighs and shakes her head. "I can't leave a shoe in the middle of the floor. And I don't want to because I know it's dangerous. You and David put all that dangerous crap in our yard." She shakes her head again and then leaves the room.

"Hell," Mark mumbles and runs a frustrated hand through his hair. He feels like a chastised child. He feels like an asshole because Meredith is right. He'd stupidly put his best friend in danger. He and David definitely deserved any crap coming their way over the dumb prank.