Fifth Morning (3)
Rin listlessly slaved away in the remains of her workshop, insensate to the calls of the outer world.
Food, hygiene, social responsibilities...they all fell to the wayside of her current project and its importance.
Although the social responsibilities part wasn't as pressing as it had once been, if not outright pointless. With so much of the city in ruins school had been closed, the properties her family had owned (the ones Kirei hadn't lost to purposeful ineptitude) destroyed, most of her classmates were probably dead or memory wiped so thoroughly that they didn't know why their homes were gone and, quite frankly the Mage Association would only reopen a line of communication if they wanted to crucify her.
...Some owner of Fuyuki she had made. She had been brainwashed by an Apostle mere hours after her official entry to the war, lost her Servant and been beaten by her long presumed dead sister during said brainwashing...and then been publicly humiliated in front of people she realized she barely even knew.
…
Public humiliation. As if. She had been dragged over the metaphorical coals of her failures and past demons by a sister who had every right to hate her. What was she supposed to say in the light of Sakura's Hell? That she was sorry? That she had always been busy with her own studies, that she had been raised to believe sibling separation was normal, that by the time she could think and act for herself she had thought she was dead?
Any attempt at justification or reasoning would have sounded hollow, compared to what had happened to the girl. The girl who hadn't been saved by Rin but by complete strangers, who hadn't even appeared to get anything out of their actions aside from the simple recognition that helping her was the right thing to do.
...She felt sick, sick enough that she couldn't bear to face other people, interact and talk with them as if her entire world hadn't collapsed when she wasn't even around to see it happen.
Arriving home to see it largely destroyed-only her workshop and parts of the basement intact-had just been the icing on the cake.
Now she only had one final project, a desperate attempt at preserving her sanity and sense of self-worth before…
Well, she didn't actually know what she was going to do after this. Her financial standing was going to be bad enough that Root only knew how she would afford her gems for research, assuming some friendly Enforcer types simply didn't kick down her door...or maybe she would be killed by looters? Her guard dropped for a split-second only to be killed by some hobo with a knife or gun.
Wouldn't that be a fitting end?
Listlessly returning to her work Rin once again set a priceless ruby on her desk-
-and barely even blinked as the door to her workshop was knocked on by someone, a strong voice shouting, "Hey, open up! I've got something to talk with you about, Rin Tohsaka!"
The Magus cocked her head at the mystery individual's words, considered them...and went back to work, interest lost. She had that door under a bevy of protective spells, anyone trying to break in would need an ample amount of time and effort, time and effort she could use to focus on her project-
BANG!
Rin was mildly surprised that the mystery person had taken the far more direct path of simply kicking down the door with brute force, rather than disabling its myriad of protections.
...She couldn't really muster the energy or urgency to defend herself, merely watching a broad and tall figure walk through the entryway like it was a morning stroll.
She was again sort of surprised to find none other than the Kaleidoscope himself staring around her reduced workshop with a raised eyebrow and tilt to his head, powerful crimson eyes eventually settling onto her own.
It was a measure of how exhausted Rin was that she didn't even waver when staring down one of the most powerful individuals in the world, only holding the gaze out of idle, morbid interest that her executioner was someone of such importance.
Well, it sort of made sense that it would be him. He'd been one of the members who helped create the Grail system, offered the founding families a means to achieve their wish and famously stated that while the Tohsaka's may never be one of the greatest families to ever exist...they were steadfast and righteous, ultimately people of good character.
And then she had come along, failing to control the ritual that had lead to the deaths of countless innocents, came dangerously close to exposing the Moonlit World and basically undid almost everything her family had done over the centuries all within a few short days.
Say what you wanted to about the Kaleidoscope, but it was well known that he took a vindictive sort of pleasure in humiliating and destroying those who exploited the innocent simply for the sake of expediency or base cruelty.
She briefly remembered that mundane saying, that a man shoots his own dog. Yeah, that seemed fitting…she fit the bill for being a bitch on a number of different levels.
"Well you look like shit. Not exactly a good image for a refined young lady such as yourself to display."
Rin blinked, momentarily caught off guard by the comment.
"If you're here to tie up loose ends, at least do me the favor of not dragging it out, Kaleidoscope."
Some distant part of her was having a mental breakdown at the fact she had so rudely insulted someone who could make her life a living Hell...but most of it just didn't give a damn.
But yet again to her surprise the Vampire merely shrugged, stating, "Touchy, aren't we? But very well then. Rin Tohsaka, I want you to be my apprentice. Yes or no?"
…
NOW she was paying full attention, mind screeching to a halt and completely bewildered as to what the words leaving the man's mouth were even supposed to mean.
"I'm...sorry?"
"Sorry for what? For not understanding the question or for having to turn me down? Or are you apologizing for accepting the offer and knowing ahead of time I'll be pulling my hair out over how lousy of a pupil you are?"
"I thought you were here to kill me."
Raising an eyebrow the Apostle gave her form an appraising glance, remarking, "It looks like someone already gave that particular act their best shot. I figure you don't want to experience a second assassination attempt so soon after the first so I'll have to disappoint you in that regard. No, I'm not here to kill you."
Rin looked down at herself, sluggish mind finally taking stock of her appearance.
She...really did look awful. Hair snarled and matted with dirt, face streaked with ash and soot, coat torn and frayed while her leggings looked like several dozen angry cats had rampaged over them. Factor in the various small cuts adorning her skin, the significant bruising around her throat and two puckered scars on her thighs and she probably looked like a victim of domestic abuse.
...When had her legs been fixed? Had somebody healed them? Or had she walked the entire way back home then healed them? She couldn't remember…
Turning back to her project Rin emotionlessly replied, "I don't think you want me to be your apprentice."
"Oh? Well it's not often that I'm wrong so I confess to a great deal of curiosity in that statement of yours. Do please attempt to convince me that I am mistaken in recruiting you."
He lazily sat down on one of her workshop's counters, manner polite and irreverent as Rin began to channel her mana.
"I'm the worst possible Tohsaka candidate that would ever fall under your tutelage. It would be a waste of time."
"Time doesn't mean too much to an Apostle, so that argument is kaput. And worst possible Tohsaka candidate? I would wager that being either your father or Nagato."
The Tohsaka heir didn't quite manage to hide her wince at the accusation of her predecessor.
"Tokiomi willingly passed off his daughter to a foul man like Zouken Matou, blithely thinking that it was for his daughter's ultimate benefit. And Nagato...well he was actually a pretty decent individual, with a heart in the right place. Kind of lousy at magecraft though. So there, another argument debunked, continue if you wish."
"I allowed myself to be hypnotized and subsumed by the Ancestor, riding out the entire war in a daze and awoke only to realize I'd fallen short in fulfilling every duty under the sun. I failed. In every sense of the word."
"That's technically not an argument, but I'll address it anyway. All Magus fail, you know that. All living creatures fail. Failure is what precedes success. Even if by some miracle you get something right the first time I'd wager my Jewel Sword that you'll screw up performing the same action some point in the future. Hell, I've been alive for centuries and I still bite my damn tongue every now and again, despite having ample opportunity to practice chewing. We all have our bad days. Now, how about an actual argument that I can debunk in a less roundabout and philosophical manner?"
Rin blinked at the sudden blurriness crossing her vision, of the tightness of her throat as fingers dug harshly into the edge of the table, shoulders beginning to shake uncontrollably.
"I...I...I did something unforgivable. I left my sister to the tender mercies of that monster, never tried to contact her after the end of the Fourth War when father died and when I heard she perished along with the rest of the Matous...I just accepted it. I didn't try to find out the details, I didn't try to start an investigation...I just moved on. Because I had other things to do."
Once more tears began to leak from her eyes, her fist slamming against the table in a sudden display of helpless anger, breaking the skin as she sobbed, "I'm a cruel, spiteful bitch that didn't even recognize her sister when she was right in front of me! I could tell who fucking Shirou was even thought he became a damn Vampire...but not Sakura, oh not her! You don't want me as your apprentice because I'm exactly what you despise! A cold hearted Magus that cast aside her family without a second thought, all in the pursuit of some worthless damn research!"
Rin didn't remember whirling around in self-disgusted fury, screaming out her frustrations directly into the face of a man who was infinitely more powerful and important than she could ever hope to be...only snapping out of her rage as a strong hand set itself on her head, gently massaging her scalp in such an unfairly reassuring sensation that her anger faded as quickly as it had come, leaving her unable to do anything other than stand and tremble, crying like some helpless little girl.
"You've had a rough few days, kiddo...don't be afraid to let loose like that in the future, keeping it bottled up inside just means you'll explode all the more furiously and unpredictably later."
Rin used a shaking hand to wipe away her tears...and winced as only more burning accompanied the action, her dirty and filthy hands making the situation worse-
"Oh dear, best be fixing that."
A blast of icy water impacted Rin right in the face, the young Magus blinking away the liquid and revealing the smirking face of the Kaleidoscope, finger pointed in her direction.
"Better? Good. Now listen up, this is one statement of yours I'm quite excited to ruthlessly squash."
Affixing her with a glare that instinctively caused her to straighten her spine the Wizard Marshall explained, "You are not an inherently evil person, Rin Tohsaka. Setting aside that it's rather bold of you to assume you know what I like or dislike I do not see a cruel or uncaring young lady before me...just one that made some truly regrettable and foolish mistakes and is now desperately wishing to make up for them."
His gaze landed on her project, shaking his head before once more nailing the Magus in place with the force of his glare.
"Do you know how rare it is, that a Magus truly feels grief and loss over a failing similar to yours? How many do you think swiftly forget the tragedy or attempt to rationalize it, compared to those who make honest amends? One in ten? A hundred? A thousand? This grief of yours is a rare gift that I would not see squandered."
Appearing more contemplative than stern the aged Vampire mused, "But since you seem to be so stubborn about the idea...how about a wager?"
He approached her project, gesturing to it before remarking, "Prove to both yourself and me that you have the talent and desire to right your wrongs, to become greater than your failures so that you can then look your sister in the eye one day and hold your head proud...or at least keep it from bowing down in shame, I wouldn't presume to guess which is more important to you. Do this, and I'll personally fund your apprenticeship and keep you from hanging by the neck. That's probably not the execution method the Association had in mind, but you get the gist."
Staring blankly at the Vampire Rin eventually shrugged, mechanically moving to her desk and once more reaching out with her hands, feeling the twisting pathways of her magic circuits once more spin to life, project again at the forefront of her mind.
This was similar to what her father had showed her so long ago, shaping a jewel into a form that was far and away from its original state, using nothing but memory and intent with carefully applied 'chisels' of prana...but this was undoubtedly the most complicated practice of that art she had ever attempted.
Seconds turned into minutes, sweat beginning to dot her brow as she carefully, painfully brought the desired image within her mind to life, meticulously recreating a scene that would never be but always desired deep within her heart.
An exhausted breath left her as she ceased her work, gazing at the shaped jewel with the faintest tinges of pride and melancholy.
Smooth, glistening surfaces displayed a group of five people gathered together, laughing at some unknown joke as fire made of crimson stone blazed next to them, casting their forms into shifting patterns of light.
Her, Sakura, Father, Mother and even Kariya...all gathered together like they should have been, had the ideas and culture of the Magi not ripped them apart.
She started as a hand clasped her shoulder, the Wizard Marshall nodding in approval.
"Good girl. Pack your things, we're leaving in a couple minutes."
Blinking at the sudden anti-climax and short time frame Rin turned to face the Vampire, confusedly asking, "We...we are? I passed?"
"Of course you did. Although considering the state of your house...nah, we don't need to stick around for something as long and boring as minutes."
And then, to her utter dismay and confusion, the Vampire promptly pulled a bag from inside his cloak, sweeping her workshop benches and tables full of gems and sensitive instrumentation into the container with the care and reverence of a surly cat, all while remarking, "I have some second-hand tools if any of these get broken, so don't worry about it. Here."
Handing her both the bulging knapsack and her most recent creation the Kaleidoscope smirked at her dumbfounded expression, remarking, "Welcome to my tutelage, Rin Tohsaka. You're going to hate it here just as much as all of my other pupils have."
"Wha-"
"Good answer! Off we go now, there's one last stop we have to make."
"Wha-"
A sharp poke of his cane caught her in the stomach, toppling the girl through a manifested hole in reality and Rin couldn't help but wonder if she would survive long enough to one day be proud of who she would become. Or at least stay sane along the way.
Eccentric, caring grandpa Zelretch is best Zelretch. Change my mind.
Unrelated side not, I posted another chapter of Death's Heroes the other day and the number of followers and favorites for the rest of my stories just EXPLODED. Something like 20-30 for this one alone.
I gotta update that shit more often!
