Aftermath (5)

Sella sighed, going about her usual duties with a resigned and slightly despairing air.

It seemed that her charge had yet again dragged her step-sibling off to bed for a night of 'fun'...again.

Clothes and undergarments lay scattered about the room—from both involved parties—some of them sporting clear signs of arousal as damp spots dotted the fabric, Sella gingerly handling those as she quickly moved to pile them into the washbasket.

She knew Illyasviel was under a great deal of stress, in both trying to act as a proper head of the family and survive her tutelage under other True Magicians. Every night she came back at incredibly late hours, exhausted and more often than not sporting a massive headache or other aches and pains...it was only her time spent with Shirou that kept her from likely murdering someone out of aggravation and for that Sella was grateful.

If only they weren't so loud!

A blush colored the Homunculus's pale skin as she picked up a set of racy lingerie laying in the center of a small dent in the bed, mind easily recalling the shouts that had echoed throughout the estate, of her charge calling for her lover to pound her into the mattress.

"Milady could stand to be a bit more reserved with her wants, at this rate she'll turn into some kind of easy nymphomaniac that any man will be able to lay with!"

The maid knew that was the opposite of the truth—her lady was far too proud to ever lower herself to such a state—and that it was just her irritation and frustration showing through.

As glad as she was that Illyasviel finally had someone who genuinely cared for her in that way...hearing their romantic trysts each and every night had left her more aware than ever that she herself didn't really have anybody she was close to.

As inadequate as she had been at the more domestic side of their duties it was at times like this Sella truly did miss Leysritt. She could always count on her sister to distract her from the constant stream of work, whether it was for the better or the worse...

"How silly of me. An artificial doll, thinking of being a Human and wishing for something approaching normality. Milady has been a bad influence. There is no need for a tool to-EEP?!"

"Yo, gorgeous."

Sella leapt high into the air, dropping her basket full of clothing as her hands flew to her bottom, the playful slap on sensitive skin snapping her out of her thoughts like a lightning strike.

"Lancer, have you absolutely no sense of common decency and manners?"

"Of course I do, I just find them to be a massive waste of time and energy in almost every scenario. Simple and honest is best."

"Your idea of simple and honest equates to what my people would label 'stupid and hedonistic'."

"That's what I love about you, Saber. So kingly, noble, stately and a way with words. Or maybe that's just the cultural differences speaking."

"AHEM!"

Both Arturia and Cú Chulainn turned to look at the maid as she regained her composure, glaring at the blue-haired man with a narrowed gaze.

"Do you two perhaps need anything? Or is there another reason you decided to so brazenly attract my attention?"

"Actually I just slapped you on the ass because you looked miserable and I figured you would appreciate the distraction-"

SMACK!

"-and assailing the common man isn't a very kingly thing to do, Arturia."

Lightly rubbing his bicep where the King of Knights had landed a solid hit the smaller blonde idly stated, "When standards of respect are violated it matters not whether the perpetrator is a farmer or noble, the law and justice must be upheld."

Lancer turned to face the other Servant, remarking, "You know ever since you decked your favorite knight across the face you've been pretty free with the physical discipline."

A proud smile crossed Saber's features, tone confidant as she stated, "Indeed! Had I known the respect and loyalty a simple punch across the cheek can enforce I would have employed this technique far more often during the course of my reign. It's remarkably effective in quelling an overconfident and irritating mutt-OWIE!"

Eye twitching in irritation Cú Chulainn promptly pinched the ahoge on Saber's skull, yanking on it as the Servant vainly tried to dislodge his fingers.

"Oh look, I caught a lion by the scruff. Guess it doesn't matter how big the cat, at the end of the day if you know how to handle them right they're just a bunch of pussy-OW, FUCK!"

Hopping on one leg the crimson-eyed lancer held his shin with both hands, glaring at the teary-eyed Saber as she desperately massaged her single strand of hair, leg still outstretched where she had kicked him.

"H-have you no shame?! Manhandling a King's person in such a brazenly disrespectful manner?!"

"Interesting that you talk about shame, when you went for the underhanded blow to my frickin' leg! Some chivalry junky you are!"

Sella blankly stared at the arguing pair and briefly wondered if this was how her ladyship and Shirou would grow to be in their later years.

...Likely not. She had a difficult time imagining the newly turned Apostle to be anything other than stoic and reserved.

"May I ask why the two of you are here?"

Both Servants turned to face the maid, continuing to massage their respective 'injuries' as Lancer shrugged, stating, "Well we kinda noticed that you just sorta took care of a bunch of mundane shit all day, never really going anywhere or doing anything or talking to anyone."

Saber nodded as Sella felt her brow twitch at the blatant observation.

"So we elected to see if you desired our company. There are not many among the Einzberns here who view us with anything short of wary suspicion and speaking with this overly aggressive mutt all the time is a trying experience by any standard."

"Oi."

Sella cocked her head, asking, "Is Assassin not also with you?"

"Eh, she's fun to talk to in small bursts. Long term-conversation inevitably turns into discussions about the best way to turn someone into a meat sleeping bag. She means well, but creepy. Besides, she prefers to use her free time to meet up with those two Church reps, the Sakura and Caren hotties."

The Homunculus felt herself shift uncomfortably for a moment.

Two Heroic Spirits, great warriors of ancient past and significant power...wanted to spend time with her? An artificial construction with a timed shelf life?

"Well, if you insist. But I have duties that must be carried out, I can't imagine they would be of much interest to Heroes of the olden age."

To the albino's surprise both merely shrugged, Lancer stating, "Eh, I'm pretty numb to domestic and repetitive tasks. Breaking camp each day when traveling the lands became the most relaxing part of the jouney, to be honest."

Saber nodded, adding, "Were it not for the maids, cooks and stable boys my knights would not have been able to fight, whether from hunger pains, frayed clothing or weak horses."

A shiver wracked the small woman's frame.

"Especially the hunger pains..."

Humbled by their words the maid quietly replied, "Oh, well...if you wish to come along then I have no objections."

"Course you don't, here, let me get those."

Before Sella could say otherwise Lancer manifested his spear and began expertly flipping the scattered clothing into the waiting basket with perfect accuracy, chortling as he noted, "Damn, those two have been getting busy a lot, haven't they?"

"You haven't heard them?"

The maid's disbelieving tone caused Lancer to smirk as he flipped a final set of panties into the waiting basket, tone playful as he asked, "No, why? You been listening in?"

Blushing at the implication the albino retorted, "Of course not! But Milady is, well...she's rather vocal about things, when in the heat of, err...passion."

Quickly gathering the laundry she made her way out of the room, the two Servants following in her wake, Lancer snickering before stating in a singsong tone, "Sounds like someone is repressed~!"

"D-do not be so crude, Servant! My purpose is only to serve Milady!"

"Can do that with something other than domestic chores, if you know what I mean. There was this one time my master did this thing with her fingers to another lass that-"

WHAP!

Sella felt a brief rush of air ruffle her clothing, glancing backwards only to find Lancer's arm blocking what had looked to be a strike to the ribs from Saber, both Servants glaring at the other.

"Oh look, an unwanted advance from the King of Knights. I wonder how that got there? Too bad it was a weak strike and completely blockable."

"It seems my arm seeks out incessant and unnecessary barking from undesirable mutts. Apologies, next time I shall not miss."

The pair continued their staredown, bodies not so much as twitching-

-and three more swift strikes each ended with a small gust of air and intertwined limbs, emerald eyes glowering at smug crimson.

Saber broke the impromptu competition with a huff, stating, "There is a time and a place for such abrasive and demeaning comments, Lancer. To save you the trouble, the time is 'never' and the place is 'around respectable persons'."

"Well it seems I can say whatever I want around you then, ain't nothing respectable about you, Saber."

Sella resisted the urge to sigh as the sound of yet more irritated strikes echoed through the Einzbern home...and felt her lips curving in a small smile as the two heroes of old followed in her wake, arguing all the while.

Perhaps the coming days wouldn't be so boring after all.


"Oh, oh! And then Swordlady bashed Spearguy over the head, he got mad at that and they started fighting! Heh heh, all the white-haired people were worried and arguing over who would go to stop them. None of them did, it was Maidlady who had to tell them to stop destroying things."

"Oh? And how are the midget and Shirou doing?"

The Servant answered Caren's question with an idle kick of her legs, hot water covering her up to her chest as Sakura lightly scrubbed her pale locks, a purr of enjoyment leaving the girl as she replied, "We hear her complaining about her teachers all the time, saying things like they're a bunch of assholes and that they suck. Swordguy and Other Other Mommy spend almost every night in their bedroom making loud noises...it sounds like they're fighting but always show up the next morning really happy and relaxed."

Jack turned innocent eyes towards Sakura, the young woman lightly towling off her former Servant as she leapt out of the tub with a slight smile, asking, "Mommy? What are they doing?"

It was Caren who replied, closing the bible she had been reading before offering an angelic smile, explaining, "They are engaging in sinful and decadent acts, Assassin. You should not seek to emulate their actions unless you find another individual who will wed you before the Lord."

"Hypocrite..."

Sakura's whispered comment went ignored by both other individuals, Jack sagely nodding as she stated, "Ohh...ok, thanks, Other Mommy."

Finally being dried off to her satisfaction the Servant leapt into Sakura's lap, asking, "Anything else you want to ask, Mommy?"

"No, Jack. You have been doing good work in keeping us informed."

The Servant squirmed in delight, snuggling into Sakura's chest with a pleased, "Eh heh heh~!"

The Executor and Exorcist shared a glance, quietly returning to their respective hobbies without further comment, Caren exchanging the Bible for a report from the Vatican.

Much of the Moonlit World had fallen quiet, with barely a fraction of the normal activity occurring all across the globe, as if the Supernatural were preparing for the Aylesbury Ritual approximately one year, three months and five days away.

This left much of the Church with a surprising amount of downtime, Sakura and Caren mostly just keeping up to date on the activities of their Magus allies and reporting things to their superiors.

"Should we perhaps visit them?"

Caren blinked in surprise at Sakura's question, inquiring, "It would be rather odd for a pair of Church members to meet with such unusual members of the Magus Association."

"We have been granted a great deal of leeway in how we acquire our information. And I would like to see Illya-sama and Shirou-sama again."

A bit caught off guard by Sakura's unusually proactive and blatant desire for something Caren shrugged, replying, "Well, there do seem to be a lack of unscrupulous individuals currently preying upon the Lord's children. I believe our absence would not be missed."

Turning back to her report as Sakura and Jack left to clear the action with their superiors the Exorcist calmly flipped a page...and smirked, feeling a great deal of giddiness at the prospect of teasing the munchkin about her harlot ways.

She offered up a prayer for the Lord to forgive her evil ways...and began to plot.


Sorry bout the sudden lack of updates, final's week kept me busy...but on the plus side there's only one more semester to go before I get that sweet sweet Bachelors (Thankfully I have enough work opportunities due to internships that I don't have to pitch in for a master's yet)

On a far different note me and roomate saw Rise of Skywalker while totally shitfaced last night and...oof.

As a Star Wars fan that's been all over the EU since he could first read with book series like Heir to the Empire or standalone's like Shadows of the Empire the Disney Trilogy is just painful. We weren't nearly drunk enough.

Tagline should have been The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many plot contrivances some consider to be unnatural.

Anyway should be back to normal updating. I am dead inside.