Zenitsu had been here in this mansion for only two day, and he was already getting sick of it. There were too many hallways, too many stairs, too many doors and too many of too much of everything and it was annoying. Huffing in a barely contained irritation, he turned down another corridor; making sure that his hearing was still fully devoted to the soft whirling of the pond five floors below and out in the garden somewhere.

Filtering out the noises wasn't easy, and sometimes he just wanted to revert back to not using his keen hearing senses; in fact, he wanted to use them for other things beside training. Like making his way through this ridiculous maze of a mansion, but he couldn't. Not according to Obanai-senpai. He needed to train to get better, so with another heavy sigh, he made sure his ears were still tracking the calming waters bellow him as he slowly made his way down another flight of stairs.

A hissing sound disrupted his concentration and Zenitsu's head shot up. Ah, "Kaburamaru," he whispered; trying not to disrupt the sleeping servants on this floor "What are you doing here? Aren't you cold?" The snake only hisses again; curling tightly around himself in the tiny corner he had found comfort in.

Zenitsu's feet were prickling with the turning weather of the autumn season and his breaths was puffing out into white clouds, so he couldn't imagine Kaburamaru finding himself content in this dreadful temperature. "You're freezing aren't you," he mutters; quickly taking of his haori and sinking down onto his knees. "Here." Pale yellow eyes stare into his soul and Zenitsu swallows down his unease. He'd never fully felt comfortable with the snake, but Kaburamaru has always been kind to him so-

With another hiss, his new friend slithers on top of the patterned haori, and Zenitsu finds himself smiling down at him in relief before scooping the cloth and the reptile into his arms. "Let's get out of here ok?" A gentle hiss and a white head on his shoulder makes the blonde relax a bit more as he gets back on his feet. "I guess you were cold after all," he whispers; lifting two fingers to pat the snake while he begins to walk again. Kaburamaru shakes his head and ducks back into his arms, and Zenitsu laughs. It was funny how a reptile so scary looking could be so shy when it came to affection.

No more surprises greet the in-training demon slayer after that. And while he is keeping up a quiet chatter with the snake resting on his chest, the teen finally makes it down to the first floor and looks around. "Hungry?" he asks. Kaburamaru says nothing, and Zenitsu hums in thought. "I guess me neither." Frowning at the kitchen entrance one last time, he turns around to find Fuyoko-chan. If she was awake it would be fun to talk to her. They talked two days ago; it had been nice. Talking to her had felt like a weight coming of his shoulders. Fuyuko-chan had helped him remember the good times with gramps, hell even Kaigaku-senpai. And although it was late and most of everyone had gone to sleep, Zenitsu hoped he could find her still awake somewhere.

He doesn't find either masters of the house unfortunately and his shoulders fall in resignation. After looking for forever he's just about to give up on seeing another living soul awake in this empty like manor, when he unintentionally passes Obanai-senpai's room. He wouldn't have even noticed the fact, if Kaburamaru hadn't hissed low from his throat when they were about to pass the open door.

Zenitsu comes to an abrupt halt. Kaburamaru stills. The door was slightly ajar and try as he might, the teen couldn't hear anyone inside, and how could he. It was almost midnight. And Obanai-senpai was probably outside training again. He'd done it during their whole week journey to this facility, and things weren't probably different for him now either, which meant-

He shouldn't, but Zenitsu still finds himself gently pushing the door open and peeking in. "Oh," he breaths as his gaze immediately zeroes in on the already packet bag and cleaned up room. Obanai-senpai was ready to leave any minute now and he hadn't even said anything to him yet.

'Of course, he hasn't,' his thoughts whisper back viciously.'You're pathetic and a failure. Obanai-senpai doesn't have to tell you anything because you're not worthy.'

It's not a pleasant thought, but Zenitsu would be lying to himself if he said it didn't ring true. The pillar didn't owe him anything. Still-

Frowning, he slams the door shut and stomps off. Sure Obanai-senpai didn't owe him anything, but that didn't mean he shouldn't have the common decency to tell it to his face. Zenitsu knew he was going to be left behind, but couldn't Obanai-senpai show him even a hint of respect and just tell him straight up? It's not like he had promised to train him or anything?

For some reason; chest heaving and face flushed red, it bothers him that a man he barely had gotten to know is about to just drop him and leave him behind. And for some reason, it hurts.

His temper tantrum of a walk leads him outside and-

"Breath of The Serpent Second Form: Venom Fangs of the Narrow Head!"

The one person he hadn't wanted to see.

The snake pillar looks elegant as he moves around the garden; sword held firmly between his fingers and breath steady as he meticulously runs through forms and compensates for his injured leg by barely putting any pressure on it.

He looks like art. He sounds strong. He moves like a demon slayer.

Watching him; even despite his injuries, move like he was born with a sword in his hands makes Zenitsu feel small where he stands; barely hidden behind the doorframe. He's still holding Kaburamaru in his arms, but the familiar weight of the sword on his hip suddenly draws all his focus away from the self-pity in his gut and instead begins to burn viciously at his side. Burn as if it was mocking him for his weakness, for his lack of talent.

Obanai-senpai never turns around to look at him; still going through the motions and keeping his eyes firmly faced forward, but his legs do shift when Zenitsu ducks down out of sight when the other man swings his sword too close to the door and his breath does stutter when Zenitsu lets out a surprised yelp; showing that he is indeed aware of the blonde's presence. Still, he doesn't call out to him. Doesn't ask him to get out and train, and it makes Zenitsu grit his teeth, blink away the wetness in his eyes and stalk away from the older man.

He didn't need Obanai-senpai to teach him how to fight. He could learn it all on his own. So what if the pillar hadn't asked him to train with him each time he'd stumbled across him practicing? So what if he hadn't so much as acknowledged his presence during meal times? So what? He'd probably already given up on him and wasn't ready to actually tell it to Zenitsu's face and well, that just made Obanai-senpai even more pathetic than himself, the blonde decided. Gramps always said to show people a certain level of respect even if you didn't think they deserved it, and clearly Obanai-senpai wasn't even capable of that.

Not only was he going to leave him, but he wasn't even going to train him while he was still here?

"Screw him," he muttered; bringing the white snake closer to his chest. "I don't need his useless training anyways."

"Is that why you have yet to join me in practice?"

Zenitsu jumped, and screamed, and almost dropped poor Kaburamaru on the floor; making the snake hiss and climb up his shoulders in a flash. Swiveling around, he gaped at the demon slayer who had been standing behind him, arms crossed, and one eyebrow lifted to the sky. "Well?"

Zenitsu was still trying to push his heart back into its former place where it had jumped out of in fear. "You scared me," he shouted

"Another reason why you'll make a terrible demon slayer, but what else is new."

"What?" Unconsciously, he'd taken a small step back. Something his senpai clearly noticed, because it made his nose scrunch up and his head tilt down in disapproval.

"I have given you several chances to come and join my training on your own, but you're clearly not capable of making important decisions when left alone kid, so let's go. I don't wish to waste more time on you." He beckons with his fingers as he turns away; almost expecting Zenitsu to just obediently trot along after him and maybe Zenitsu would have done so, but not today.

"I won't make a terrible demon slayer!" He said loudly instead; hands curled into balls and lips wobbling slightly. "Gramps said I would be great."

Obanai-senpai scoffs. He doesn't even look back at him; continuing to walk as if Zenitsu wasn't even worth his attention. "Kuwajima-san was too soft on you. I'm not here to sugarcoat anything for you Agatsuma. I will train you but I won't tell you what a great job you've done when that's clearly a lie."

It was as if his very own soul was being stricken down with the sharp side of a sword.

"If you were going to train me, why didn't you just tell me so!" Maybe this whole argument was stupid, maybe it was ridiculous in the large scheme of things, but Zenitsu didn't care. Clearly Obanai-senpai wanted to pick a fight and good for him, because that's exactly what Zenitsu wanted too.

This time the snake pillar does turn around; glare firmly in place. Easy to spot even in the darkness only illuminated by the lights. "I don't have to ask you for anything," he said slowly; taking one and then two steps in Zenitsu's direction. "You wanted me to train you, you show up and train. It's that simple. Or," his eyes narrow. "Do you expect me to run after you each time you decide you're not good enough?"

Zenitsu stumbles. "I-"

An image of gramps flashes through his head. Gramps who constantly dragged him back by the scruff of his neck every time he'd tried to run away. Gramps ran after him.

"I- that's... I-"

"Speak clearly brat."

"It's-"

[Do you expect me to run – do you expect me to run after – do you expect me to run after you ]

His eyes water and his teeth shatter noisily. Almost as if ice had been breathed into his lungs and fire had been set to his feet. Obanai-senpai didn't know. He didn't know what those words ment so he couldn't have understood. He couldn't have and yet. "I never asked you to do that," he whispers; legs shaking and fingers clutching at an empty haori.

"No you didn't." The pillar relents. "That doesn't mean you're not running away. It doesn't prevent the fact that you're retreating whenever the going gets tough and that," he points a finger at his chest. "Is what is going to prevent you from becoming a demon slayer."

Obanai-senpai was talking to him like a child. Like someone who didn't understand the stakes of his own decision, of his own revenge. He wasn't taking him seriously.

'Probably why he was planning on leaving me behind.'

Hell, Zenitsu was almost sure all this was actually only an excuse for the man to wash his hands of him once and for all. Drop him off with Fuyuko-chan and her husband and walk away. All this pointed advance, it all meant nothing.

It all made sense now.

Excuses excuses.

His heart pounded and Zenitsu felt his rage mounting, burning, consuming.

Excuses.

"You don't want to help me," he hissed; voice barely above a whisper, but Obanai-senpai had heard him loud and clear for his face twisted into a pale imitation of a surprise.

Yeah right.

"Stop talking nonsense brat."

"It's true isn't it?"

"Kid."

"You are going to leave me behind, so what does it matter if I don't show up to your stupid training!"

The snake pillar doesn't miss a beat. "If you want to stay alive, you train. It's that simple. Revenge might not be in the cards for yo-"

"You weren't going to help me?" Zenitsu didn't know why he went there. He didn't know why he reached that specific conclusion, but it all made sense to him now. Why those words out of Obanai-senpai's mouth felt like earth shattering under his feet. "You weren't going to help me get revenge for my family, were you?"

Obanai-senpai blinks slowly. "I was at first," he finally says; after a momentary silence. "But it's clear you're not ready for that yet. So-"

"You never planned to help me?" He can't seem to let it go. That one thing. That defining thing.

The snake pillar sighs in exasperation; almost as if this whole situation is getting on his nerves. It makes Zenitsu's insides bubble with rage.

"I am helping you kid-"

Maybe those words.

Help

Maybe that word, was what blew the lid of off Zenitsu's sanity, because from one breath to the next, he chucked his haori with all his might at the man in front of him and screamed at the top of his lungs. "If you really wanted to help me! You would have saved gramps and Kaigaku on time! You would have saved everyone! But you didn't! You didn't! And I hate you! What's the point of you being a pillar if you can't even do that!"

"I hate you!"

He screams those words over and over again until hot tears are streaming down his cheeks and until Obanai-senpai has turned around and vanished into the house. "I hate you," he screams at the top of his lungs and doesn't mean it.

Not really.

It takes a while for him to calm down. No one comes out to talk to him and he's grateful, if only a little. Obanai-senpai doesn't come back out either. Zenitsu doesn't really blame him.

Standing back up, he starts walking; aimlessly and unsure. His whole-body aches and his mouth feels dry and raw. He keeps walking.

"I was a jerk, wasn't I," he finally murmurs after walking for an hour or so; eyes trailing down the silent trees, face pinching up into an upset frown. "I was mean."

Kaburamaru hisses, and Zenitsu's face falls.

"I hate him," he whispers; the wind carrying his words and leaving him with nothing. "And he hates me too."

The snake doesn't say anything back to that; just curls tighter around his neck and falls still.

Zenitsu mimics the reptile and drops to his knees under a tree; the mansion no longer visable from where his hiding himself under the shadows of the forest. "I wish you were here gramps. I really really wish you were here"

He falls silent after that. Arm folded around his legs and face hiding in his knees. He is so preoccupied with his own misery he doesn't really hear anything, nothing until it's almost too late.

The rustling tree leaves behind him are Zenitsu's only warning before a sharp scream is torn from his lungs and he throws himself arms first into the forest floor and rolls away from the black nails aimed at his eyes.

Blood trickling down his neck, he gurgles down the horrified screams trying to lash out from his throat and jumps back as the demon; for it could be nothing else takes a giant leap towards him and swings his arms at him again. He's barely able to dodge this second blow; not even having a chance to reach for his sword as he lifts a shaking hand up to his left ear and comes away with a sticky red mess and some twisted flesh on the palm of his hand.

Kaburamaru hisses and Zenitsu looks at him with worry. If he is hurt then-

But thankfully the snake has relocated himself to his right side and nothing more than a slight gash of red indicates how close his new friend had gotten to getting slashed in two.

"Demon slayer," the giant of a demon chuckles. "It's time to die."


Hi Guys!

So we're back with Zen again. And oh boy. I feel it was about time Zenitsu lashed out at someone. He's been in denial, he has grieved (sorta) and at this point his emotions are so all over the place it's no wonder he would throw the first accusation he had at Obanai's face. Plus, Obanai is really not good with words. And I wanted it to hurt. The "why didn't you save them if you are a pillar." was meant to sting and I wanted it to sort of reflect that moment when Giyu (in episode 1) told himself that if he'd just come quicker Tanjirou's family would have been alive. I was thinking that that's probably something demon slayer's always hate themselves for, so for Zenitsu to say that, well ouch for Obanai. And boom; y'all didn't think I was just going to let them recover in peace now did you ;) A demon!