Chapter 4

Rose closed her eyes and took in the comforting scent of the dirt around her. It didn't smell quite the same as the strata in the place she had been born, but it was close enough to let her cast her mind back to a simpler time; when her only worries were her daily duties; when her only desire was to please her Diamond. She opened her eyes again and gazed out across the pockmarked purple canyon in which she stood; the Alpha kindergarten. The sky was a dull grey, so the light filtering down into the canyon was dim at best, but it was still possible to make out the multitude of roughly Gem-shaped holes which dotted the vast rocky walls. Rose's own kindergarten had been decidedly pinker in appearance, but the resemblance between the two was close enough that the place still gave Rose a pleasant feeling of nostalgia.

Over the past few weeks, she had come to the kindergarten often, whenever she needed a place to think, and found herself unable to clear her head within the confines of her room. The place was a nice trip down memory lane, as tinged with bitterness as those memories might have been. It could never put her mind entirely at ease though; she suspected nothing would. As she stared out at the canyon, the complete lack of organic life was conspicuous to her for the first time. She had never really taken note of it before, but the few weeks she had spent in Beach City had caused her to grow accustomed to constant movement and noise. The kindergarten was utterly static; dead. The familiar surroundings quickly became a lot less pleasant when she reflected on the fact that, had she succeeded in her plan, the entirety of the Earth's surface would have looked much the same. A pang of guilt shot through her as she pictured the bustling environment of Beach City reduced to baked soil and petrified trees. She tried to push the thought to the back of her mind. That future hadn't come to pass; Steven had stopped her; snapped her out of her insanity before she could do irreparable damage. For that she was grateful.

During her previous visits to the kindergarten, no one had followed her, suggesting that either the others didn't know where she disappeared off to every now and then, or that they were wisely choosing to give her space. This visit, however, was an exception. Rose whirled around as she heard the unmistakable sound of the kindergarten's warp pad echoing through the otherwise deathly quiet canyon. She wasn't sure who else would be visiting, but there were quite a few Quartzes among the uncorrupted Gems, so it wasn't surprising that one might want to visit their birthplace. As Rose rounded the corner, she was able to see the warp pad from her position. She stopped in her tracks the instant she saw its user. She had been expecting a Quartz, or perhaps the Crystal Gems' Pearl doing some sort of patrol, but instead, it was Steven who had appeared on the pad. "Figures" she thought to herself. The boy seemed to have some sort of magnetic attraction to anyone who was moping.

"Hi Rose!" said Steven with a smile. "Checking out the kindergarten? Peridot always tells me this place is super impressive, but I kinda like places with a bit more colour…and life… and fewer death machines."

Rose stifled a chuckle. She wasn't sure when she had begun to find Steven's unique outlook so endearing. Still, as much as she enjoyed his company, she wasn't particularly in the mood for visitors. "Steven, how did you even know I was here?" she asked. The kindergarten warp wasn't exactly the first place any human would choose to go; not that Steven was human.

"Oh, I just figured that if I was a Quartz soldier who wanted to go be brooding, this is where I would come" Steven replied nonchalantly. "Also there are only so many warps on Earth so I kinda just went through them all until I found you" he admitted with a shrug and a grin. Upon hearing that, Rose conceded defeat. There was no getting away from Steven when he decided you needed talking to, and if she was being honest with herself, her visits to the kindergarten weren't helping her feel much better. "Alright Steven" she said, throwing up her hands, "what do you want to talk about?"

"Whaddya think?" Steven asked with a knowing smile.

"Feelings?" asked Rose unenthusiastically.

"Feelings" replied Steven matter-of-factly. Seeing Rose rolling her eyes, he quickly continued. "Aw, c'mon! It's not like you've been getting any happier by coming here and moping all the time." Rose knew in her heart that he was right, and, even if he hadn't been, there wouldn't have been any talking him out of it. If she hadn't known that he was a Diamond, Rose would have sworn that he had been designed specifically for therapy. There were no Gems designed for therapy of course; mental health hadn't exactly been one of Homeworld's priorities in previous eras, but Steven was a welcome change from the norm. As Rose moved to sit beside him though, he held up his hands, motioning for her to wait. "Hold on, I think we should talk someplace a little less depressing. You wanna come back to the beach with me?" Rose found the request slightly strange, but then Steven did seem a lot more uncomfortable in the kindergarten than she was. "Alright I suppose" she replied. "Let's go."


As the pair materialised on the warp pad which adorned one of the many hands of the Crystal Gems' temple, Rose felt the cool sea air hit her. The air in the kindergarten had been static and stale, and the beach was admittedly more pleasant. A collection of identical shirts fluttered on a line over their heads, each a perfect copy of the one Steven was currently wearing. Rose wasn't sure why a being who could remove his appearance modifiers on command would choose to always wear the same thing, but she was used to Steven being an enigma. What she was altogether unprepared for though, was the sight that greeted her as she stepped forwards to sit on the edge of the hand. Sapphire was stood down on the beach metres below, looking up at her with a mix of nervousness and anticipation.

Rose stood stock still, her mouth hanging open unceremoniously. Sapphire said nothing, presumably not sure what to say. Eventually Rose spoke, but her words were directed at the young hybrid that stood beside her. "Steven, what's going on? Why is Sapphire-?"

"I… set things up so you could talk…. Isn't it great?" said Steven with the sort of nervous smile that said "please don't hurt me." Rose had no intention of doing so, but the idea of punching something was certainly tempting right now. "Sapphire decided that she wanted to talk to you, but she wasn't sure where to start, so… I offered to get you two together. Is… is that ok?" Rose took a couple of deep breaths; unnecessary for a species that didn't need oxygen, but it helped to calm her down. "Yes, that's ok…. Thank you Steven." Steven nodded, and then, seeing that both Gems were eyeing him awkwardly, took his cue to leave them to it. He stepped back onto the pad and warped into his house, leaving Rose and Sapphire alone outside the temple.

Rose jumped down from the temple's hand, landing in front of Sapphire with a soft thud. For a moment the two simply looked each other in the face, unsure who should begin. "I-" Both spoke simultaneously, stopping almost instantly when they realised they were talking over each other. Both Gems gave an awkward grin, and Rose gestured for Sapphire to go first. Sapphire had been the one who had finally agreed to talk after all; it stood to reason that she probably had something she wanted to get off her chest.

"I had Steven bring you here because…. Well I've been doing some thinking, and…" Sapphire was stammering and wringing her hands. Her tiny body was trembling in what could have been nervousness, anger, or even fear; Rose genuinely wasn't sure which. The dainty blue Gem gulped, steeling herself. "I miss you!" she blurted out loudly, exhaling deeply afterwards, glad at least to have got over the first hurdle. Rose said nothing. She wasn't sure what she even could say. On one hand, she was grateful that Sapphire felt the same way she did, but on the other, Sapphire's tone was a clear giveaway that she was still far from comfortable talking to her. "Don't get me wrong" Sapphire continued, "I'm still furious about what happened on the zoo…" Someone who didn't know any Sapphires would have doubted it, given how calm her tone seemed, but Rose heard the ice behind her voice well enough to know she was serious. "But…" Sapphire continued, "as much as being around you makes me… uncomfortable sometimes, I've realised that not being around you makes me miserable too… So I thought it might make me feel better if we tried to fix things than if we just kept avoiding each other. If… that's ok with you?"

Rose had her hands clasped over her own mouth, so she didn't attempt an articulate reply. She simply nodded and gave a quiet "mhmm" as the tears rolled down her face. Sapphire's body relaxed slightly, her trembling growing more gentle. "Ok then…" she said. "Where should we start?"

"Well…" Rose replied as she wiped at her eyes "what would you feel most comfortable with?" Sapphire thought for a moment, caressing her own chin with her thumb and forefinger. "I suppose… anything that just involves being around you really. I want to spend time with you, but every time I see you, I get these… flashes; memories of what happened." Rose nodded in understanding. That detail certainly made Sapphire's behaviour over the past few weeks understandable, though it once again filled Rose with guilt that the damage she had done to Sapphire had been so lingering. She realised how naïve she had been to ever believe that Sapphire would be alright once she had reformed. "I… need to start feeling comfortable around you again" continued Sapphire. "It may take a while, but I'd like to try, so I don't really mind what we do as long as we can take it slow and do it together."

"That's fine with me" replied Rose with a tearful smile. "Arcade?" Sapphire brightened up at the suggestion, cracking the first smile Rose had seen from her since their days in Facet 31. "That's the one with all the strange flashing boxes right?" asked Sapphire. "I do like that place. The devices function in such predictable ways. It's… comforting." Rose couldn't help but think how typical it was of a Sapphire to enjoy a game for its predictability, when most would seek out the exact opposite, but then, Sapphire's future vision was all she had, so Rose couldn't blame her. "Ok then" said Rose, wiping the last of her tears away "Hopefully the human who runs it isn't sleeping or something."

"Yes, they do do that a lot don't they?" replied Sapphire in a tone that almost sounded amused. As the two walked off down the beach towards the boardwalk, they traded jokes about the funny things humans tended to do. All the while, they kept a short distance between them; close enough to talk easily, but far enough that they never brushed against each other. Rose longed to reach out and take Sapphire's hand, but that could come later. Sapphire needed time to adjust to being around her again, and Rose was more than happy to give her as much time as it took; just being around her again felt like a crushing weight being lifted off her shoulders. There was still a distance between them, but it at least felt like a comfortable one now.

Steven stood on his balcony, watching with a smile as Rose and Sapphires' silhouettes grew more distant. Garnet walked up behind him and put her hand on his shoulder. "Well, I'd say that went pretty well" she said as he turned to look up at her. "Nice work Steven."

"That's Counsellor Steven to you" Steven said with a grin, his fists on his hips in a triumphant pose. "I think you need some sort of certificate for that" Garnet chuckled in reply. "It's… honorary" said Steven, continuing his joke on the fly. Garnet chuckled again, moving her hand up to his head and ruffling his hair. "Whatever you say, counsellor."