Black Stained
Chapter 10:
Her head was aching. She pressed her fingers to her temples and slowly tried to rub away the pain. Her head seemed to be exploding by the situation. She had finally told someone the truth. Well, part of it. Her mind was screaming not to, but her heart was bursting to let it out, to let it all out. And he was being so kind to her. She never imagined her story to be so calmly taken in by a person. She let her breath escape from her longs and took in the new and fresher air from the opened window. There were muggles on the street below her, some kind of party, all gathered around with drinks and snacks. She had gotten used to it, the muggle world. She had cut herself away from the wizarding society, like a virus, a bacteria. She stroked the skin of her arm with her fingers. She remembered his touch, the gentleness. He had told her it didn't matter. But didn't it matter? A black scar marked her and the terrible things that she had done. Her head ache increased. Maybe it was because he didn't know her so well, that he could except all this. Promise. She had promised him she wouldn't blame herself, but could she? She couldn't. She wasn't strong anymore. When he told her she was, for a hopeful second, she had believed him. She bit her tong, holding back some feelings, trying to penetrate her heart like daggers. And there was the other promise she had made him. Also a lie. How could she possibly not feel sorry. You're a liar! She squeezed her eyes shut. She took a long moment breathing in and out deeply, calming herself. There was something in the back of her head gnawing, something she had forgotten. She sighed deciding it wasn't important. She could feel him behind her, wandering curiously through the room. She didn't have to look around to know he was reading the books and research spread out around the room. She had searched and searched, which sadly enough only let to disappointment and a hopeless life. The sound of rustling paper and some mumbling from Charlie filled the room. The mug of tea had cooled down and the herbs lay motionless on the bottom. She stared into nowhere, Charlie kept reading. Baltimore was nibling on some left over nuts and screeched every now and then. An hour and a half passed by with ease dragging them through, the tansion in the room decreasing to almost nothing. There was still the unstoppable curiosity coming from Charlie, she couldn't blame him.
The peaceful silence broke.
'This research you've done...' He said without looking up from the papers, books and scribbled notes.
'Am doing.' She corrected him without turning around.
'This research you are doing...' He couldn't form the correct sentence and settled for one simple word. 'Why?'
She still didn't turn around nor move, but something about her told him she was again about to tell him something very secret. She carefully picked her words and formed a story. Again she had to tell him a piece, but then again she didn't want to tell him everything. She stayed silent too long.
'I mean, these books... some of them aren't even legal.' She heard him rustle through the papers.
'These stories... these theories and tales.' He felt silent for a moment. 'These are dark, very dark.'
Something snapped inside of her at those words.
'I am dark!' She turned around and her eyes were filled with fury.
'Don't you understand?! You said it yourself, darkness is around me and these dark stories' She waved with her hand at the papers. 'are mirroring me.'
He was perplexed and couldn't say a word. Some puzzle pieces fell in its places, but he still didn't have a clear picture of what was going on.
'Aral, listen-'
'No, you listen! I'm not just going to open up and tell you everything. I will only tell you what you need to know and what you need to know-'
She was breathing heavily and had to catch her breath. She tried to tell him, tried to open up a little bit. Words and sentences swirled through her head and she couldn't think anymore, her brain went fuzzy. Her heart started beating uncontrollably again. She was staring at something behind him and tried focussing on what she was trying to tell him, but her emotions were a tornado. Then her headache stopped suddenly and her mind cleared from the thoughts. But she was still angry, sad and confused.
'Aral'
Her name being said by him somehow calmed her down a bit, but not enough.
'Aral,' He slowly took a step forward. 'Aral, your eyes...'
She looked into his eyes. Her heart skipped a beat. Those friendly dark grey eyes filled with worry. No fear, no pity. Her hands twitched and the room started to tremble. He looked around and his eyes widened a bit, but he still wasn't afraid.
'Aral.' He said again, he took another step.
'Can you just stop this?' He didn't demand her, he asked. 'Can you calm down, please?'
He was so friendly, it hurt her.
'I can't, I can't control it!'
Her breath got taken away and she started shaking.
'Please, Charlie, get out of here!'
The trembling worsened and the wind made the papers fly, the water in her cup rose up in the air as if gravity had no power anymore.
He didn't hesitate. Not for a second. He could have been killed, but he didn't care. He took three large steps forward and wrapped his arms around her.
This took away her breath and her heart stopped beating at all. She exhaled and the trembling stopped, the water returned to her cup and the wind laid down, calm. She was paralized for a moment and then wrapped her arms around his waist. He hugged her tightly. His hair tickled her face and her cheek leaned against his broad shoulder. She breathed in his sent and listened to his heart beat, which was steady. She was calm, he had calmed her down in a matter of seconds, while she had no control over it.
She didn't let go, neither did he.
She wanted this moment to endure in silence, but she knew she had to tell him now, she had lashed out at him which had been wrong.
'I'm losing control.' She said softly.
He tilted his head so he could look at her.
'The research.' He stated, now understanding why.
'Yes,' She breathed in deeply. 'but so far I haven't really found a solution.'
She sounded so hopeless and lost, it hurt him. He loosened his grip around her and she let go of him. It had felt nice, but now they needed to return to reality. And that didn't include hugging his soon to be sister in law and best friend of his brother. They stood opposite each other a little awkward for a moment. He then turned around and walked back to the papers, realizing it had been spread all over the room by the hard wind. He started thinking and an idea sprang up in his head. She noticed his frown and could almost hear him think.
'What if you've been looking wrong?'
She frowned.
'What do you mean?'
'Well, I read parts of your research and most of it had been dark. But what if the solution is found in light and pure magic?'
'You mean iluminating the dark part within me with the light?'
She had never admitted out loud that there was darkness inside her, it shocked her a bit, but she didn't show it. He noticed this too.
'Sometimes light magic can cure dark.' He said.
Something sprang up in her mind, an idea. She looked at him and thought about his words.
'Dragons.' She muttered.
'What?' He didn't hear her clearly.
She stalked over to a couple of heavy books, laying in a pile. She searched for one in particulair. She walked over to the next pile and rumbled through it, finally finding it.
'Dragons.' She repeated, loud and clear.
He frowned at first, then his face morphed into an understanding expression.
'They tend to consume magic around them, it's what gives them the power to live.'
They gazed at each other.
'Maybe this is my solution.'
'Romania.' He stated.
She couldn't help but give him a small smile.
'We may have an vacancy opened.' He grinned.
Her smile disappeared. What if it involved magic? If? Of course there's magic involved, it's a dragon reserve! She thought to herself. It was as if he could read her mind.
'It doesn't involve a lot of magic. None, now I think about it.' He assured her.
'What is it?'
'We need a baby sitter.'
'What?' She frowned. 'I'm not-'
'A dragon baby sitter.' He said, grinning.
'Oh.'
Would it be save?
'Is it save?'
'A dragon reserve? What do you think?' He asked cheeky.
She rolled her eyes.
'Yes, I believe it is save. The stated theorie is highly likely to comply to you.'
She nodded.
'So,' She crossed her arms and looked at him. 'Romania.'
'It's a beautiful place, you know.' He chuckled.
She tried picturing herself, in Romania next to tiny little dragons. It did look beautiful, in her mind.
He cleared his throat, pulling her focus back to him. He was looking serious again.
'I have just one condition.'
She didn't really like the tone in his voice.
'Which is?'
'You write to Harry. And my family.'
She looked down at the floor, feeling ashamed.
'I know it must have been hard for you, all of this, but don't think for a second you had it harder than them. Harry...' He stopped for a moment. 'He was here you know, just a couple of hours ago, but I sent him home. Telling him he should go get some sleep, because he looked like a ghost and a wreck.'
Her eyes widened at the mention of him, he had been so close.
'Harry... He was here?' Her eyes filled with pain and sadness.
'Yeah,' He suddenly felt quilty for mentioning him and bringing back the pain.
'If you write him, he will be as he was. Your brother. And Ginny will have her fiance back.'
Her heart broke a little, but she kept calm and strong.
'I will. I will write them, all of them.' She looked into his eyes.
Before him there stood a Gryffindor, he felt her courage. Before him there stood a young woman who had just regained her strength again, who had climbed from the darkness and was now, with head helt high, standing in front of him. He smiled at the sight.
She hadn't felt this good for months now. But then she remembered his words, that his family had had it hard too, and Harry of course. She wanted to know, she needed to know.
'How was you're family when I was... gone?' She asked hesistantly.
He looked out of the window, squeezing his eyes a bit, from the setting sun.
'They weren't okay, but they were able to keep on going.'
'They're all strong.' She followed his gaze outside.
'You're strong too, you know.'
She wanted to go against this comment, but he was too quick.
'You are strong. You've just proven yourself.'
He reached out with his hand and his fingers tangled with hers. He squeezed them a bit, encouraging her.
'Thank you, Charlie.'
They watched the sun go down and the day ended.
