Chapter 13 -A new Feeling of Low

I starred at the river. Once again wishing I could take the worst parts of myself and let them flow away. I had no idea how long I'd been sitting in my misery. Thinking that no matter what I do, no matter how many patients I heal or how many charities I fund people were always going to think the worst of me. Suddenly I felt both hatred and understanding for my father. Hatred for what he'd done for my family and understanding for his death. Why on earth would I want to spend the rest of my life being rejected by everyone I'll ever meet?

Suddenly I was torn from my thoughts by someone sitting next to me. I glance over and saw Potter.

"Why are you sitting with me?" I asked glumly.

He starred at me, "Hermione came over. Apparently she had a date with you that my wife helped orchestrate in my own home without me knowing. She seemed very upset by something you said at the very end of your date. So I went by your apartment to give you hell." I raised an eyebrow at him, "I'm an auror Draco I have access to everyone's addresses. But I didn't find you there. And you weren't at any bar I could think of. Suddenly I get an owl from a rookie auror that you're sitting by the river and they aren't sure what to do. No one's ever been in the park on their duty- lucky bastard- and they don't know if they can arrest you or not."

I huff, of course everyone wants to arrest me given just the slightest opportunity.

Harry continued, "So I get here and send the kid home. Still ticked but slightly worried I may have to pull you from the river. And I lay my eyes on the sorriest sight I've seen in quite some time." I looked at Potter, offended. "And I have a one year old son who is really just an expert at making pout faces."

"You know Potter I'm surprised no one's tried to off you yet."

We both paused at what I said and he burst out laughing. I quirk a tiny smile. Who would have thought I could make the boy-who-lived-to-annoy-me laugh. He placed a hand on his chest. "Oh I needed that laugh."

I stared at him in the following silence.

Feeling my gaze he looked over at me, "I'm a married man Malfoy. Ginny sees you moving in on me and not even I could help you."

I squeeze my eyes shut and pinch the bridge of my nose, "You know Potter, some people see someone sitting alone at night as a way to be alone."

Harry rolls his eyes, "What? Did you have a bad night Draco? Mummy didn't have the house elves leave out new sheets for you?"

I stood and pointed my wand at him as he sat there, "GO TO HELL POTTER! For your information I don't live at the manor because I couldn't take it there anymore! I'm not as heartless as you people think and every time I go into that damn parlor I can still hear her screams echo off the walls! I give to countless charities and I even became a healer! What more do I have to do to get you people to see me!"

I felt completely unhinged. Harry just starred at me. Not with shock, not with fear. Just as if he were waiting for me to tie my shoes or some other mundane activity. Eventually I came back to myself and lowered my wand. Embarrassment rushed over me as I realized the things I'd admitted in my anger, and even worse as I realized he'd intentionally riled me up and I walked right into his trap.

Harry stood up and patted my back. "Now tell me what happened with Hermione."

Going to the Leaky Cauldron with Potter and talking about my night was possibly a new form of torture in and of itself. Even worse then our school days given that he's an auror and has learned a how to gain information without screaming and threatening. I grinned a little to myself thinking that as he'd aged Potter had become more Slytherin in his approach with people.

After I explained what had happened with Hermione and how sorry I was she'd taken it the wrong way Potter seemed to be in pain.

"What crawled up your ass Potter?"

Potter looked upset, "I came out tonight looking to give you hell for what you'd done to Hermione. Instead I've discovered that you aren't actually half bad am now considering helping you."

I perked up a bit, "Really?"

He scowled, "Don't look so cheerfully Malfoy I'm still not decided on it." He sighed and rubbed his face. "Look, it's late. Let's both go home. You send Hermione dozens of apology letters otherwise she'll just burn them without reading it. And I'll attempt to talk to her and tell her your side of the story." I must have looked too happy because this was immediately followed with, "And if I you ever hurt her I swear to god Malfoy you'll wish you had died in the war do you understand?"

I stood up from the bar and scoffed, "Please Potter I wish that most days." With that I popped back home to write at least one dozen apology letters. Praying she'd at least talk to me again soon, I didn't know where to go if I had another nightmare without her.