"Alright, let's try this again," said Yuki, "Weapons? I got my gun, my darts, and the syringe filled with Murmur's sedative."

"I got my gun, a knife from the kitchen, and an ax I found in the basement!~" said Yuno.

"We have a basement?"

"Yeah, there's tons of stuff down there! Deus probably put all of it there in case we needed it."

"Cool. Meat shield- I mean, Takao, you got your machete?"

"Yes."

"Good. Now-"

"Why am I a meat shield?"

"Because we all hate you. Keigo?"

"Armed and ready. If that thing even thinks about hurting one of my officers, I'll make it pray for death."

"That's the spirit. Rei?"

"Got the needles, my gas canisters, and my puppets!"

"Why do you need the puppets?"

"They help me to not focus on the fact that Tsubaki orphaned me."

"Oh, almost forgot about her. I think she's still in her room. YO, JUNKIE!"

"I'M COMING, DICKHEAD!" Tsubaki swallowed some painkillers. "I wonder if I'll die today." She sighed. "Probably not. I'm not that lucky." She walked out of her room and joined the others. "I got my knife."

"Nice. Marco?"

"I got a knife. Don't really need it, but y'know, just in case."

"We got a lot of knives here. Ai?"

"A metric fuckton of knives."

"Okay, does anyone besides me, Yuno, and Keigo have a gun? Anybody?"

"I got a gun and some grenades," said Minene.

"Alright, so that's four guns. Not bad, not bad at all, but it could be better. Kamado, you're going to stay here with John and Karyuudo as our mission control."

"Good, I detest violence."

"I love violence, but I prefer having others do it for me," said John.

"I agree," said Karyuudo.

"Yomotsu, how about you? You got any weapons?"

"A hero of my skill needs no weapons!"

"Whatever. Your funeral, dude. Okay, weapons are accounted for, moving on to our Diaries. My Observance Diary says that we're going to win, but that might change."

"My Yuki Diary says that nothing's gonna happen to Yuki in the next 10 minutes."

"My Murder Diary says that I'm not going to kill anyone today. Dammit."

"My Criminal Investigation Diary says that there's not gonna be a police report about any of this."

"Okay, so Takao and Keigo are useless," said Yuki, "Rei, what about you?"

"My Hyper Vision Diary says that our attack on the Observer is gonna happen this afternoon and end in our victory sometime during this evening."

"My Clairvoyant Diary is showing what the members of my former cult are currently seeing...so, in other words, what Marco and Ai are seeing right now. By the way, smart move infiltrating my cult like that."

"Thanks, kid. My Exchange Diary says that nothing's gonna happen to Ai in the immediate future."

"And my Exchange Diary says that nothing's gonna happen to Marco in the immediate future."

"My Propagation Diary doesn't predict the future, it only gives out Apprentice Diaries."

"That sucks. Minene?"

"My Escape Diary only tells me how to...well, the fuckin' name's pretty self-explanatory."

"So you got the coward's diary."

"Fuck you."

"That's Yuno's job. Karyuudo?"

"My Breeder's Diary is ready to control my small army of dogs."

"Never thought I'd hear that in my life. Cracker?"

"The Watcher is currently spying on the contents of your Diaries and taking note of your locations."

"The location thing could be useful. Daredevil rip-off, what about you?"

"My Justice Diary has been telling me of the Observer's rampage all day and it's not going to stop until we intervene. TO THE TWELFTHMOBILE!"

"You mean the black Chevrolet in the garage?"

"Yes, I named it the TWELFTHMOBILE!"

"That is totally queer."

"Shut up."