Tags: Alternate Universe, Slice of Life, Dread, Some Humor, Age Swap, Kidnapping, Canon Backstory, Established Relationship
Caligosto's Conundrum
Caligosto Loboto woke up sitting in a metal chair.
As a yawn escaped him, he squinted at his orderly surroundings. A long table lined with jars filled with a translucent liquid caught his attention. Round pink objects floated within them. With his glasses askew on his nose and blurring part of his vision, he couldn't properly understand what they were, but he felt an odd sense of familiarity when he noticed them.
He turned his attention to the other side of the room. Strange inventions and blueprints filled the oak shelves. He heard electricity humming from behind him, followed by soft thudding and crunching. When he sniffed the air, he was hit with a pleasant, calming scent like vanilla, contrasting sharply with the medical tools set aside on a cart next to his chair.
But as he took in his surroundings, he gasped. A sharp scream pierced through the ceiling, then ceased with a wet splat. Footsteps creaked and stopped near the spot where something hit the ground. Voices murmured, but he couldn't figure out what they were saying. When one of them cackled in palpable delight, he wished he had earned his invisibility badge.
Caligosto shuddered. He tried to move only to grimace. Steel restraints were attached to his wrists and ankles, pinning him to the chair. He shook his head, trying to dispel his disorientation, only to wince when shadows bled into the doorway. He watched them stretch, hearing his kidnappers coming closer, their voices amiable despite the shriek that had happened mere seconds ago.
Sweat beaded on his brow. He writhed in his seat. He tried kicking out his feet but could only buck his knees. Caligosto slid further into his seat, his neck craning at an awkward angle. As the shadows elongated to the floor, he squeezed his eyes shut, powerless to stop his molars from grinding when his captors entered.
Something slammed on the table. He cried out, his eyelids prying apart. He jerked upright, his glasses falling down to the tip of his nose. In front of him, he found the blurred outlines of two people, who came into view when one of them extended her finger, telekinetically pushing his glasses back up.
They wore lab coats with stained, leather smocks. The woman closer to him was much shorter than her cohort with a pair of elbow length gloves. Her hair was shaved at the sides with a mop of curly, blonde locks on top. When she leaned toward his face as if to examine him, he noticed her eyes were a shade of green, bordering on an inhumanely bright glow. Behind her was a taller man with wild orange hair draping down his back. He hummed to himself as he set a full jar on the table and slapped a photograph on the lid, his jagged teeth on display in an eerie smirk.
"You haven't screamed yet," she stated, and she straightened her back. "That's good. It's better that you remain quiet during the explanation. Otherwise, I'd have to repeat myself, and there is nothing more I loathe than reiteration."
Caligosto swallowed loud enough for everyone to hear. He shifted his gaze between them, unsure of where to look. As she inspected him, her partner pulled a clipboard out from behind an empty jar and tossed it to her. She caught it without looking and skimmed the pages. She stopped and folded the other papers back, clearing her throat.
"Caligosto Loboto. Twelve. Primary power is time bubble. Interesting." She looked at him. "We haven't had a camper with that forte yet. Most of them specialized in more generic PSI powers such as telekinesis or levitation. It makes you a standout among your peers."
"Kid's brain must be pretty strong," her partner added, joining her side. He towered over her and bent down to her eye level, gripping his knees. He snickered, flashing Caligosto a smirk. "Hey, how long have you been comin' to that camp? Years? Must be if you got that as an ability."
He didn't know whether to honestly answer. Instead, Caligosto shifted in his seat. He tried his best to make himself small, just like he would when hiding in his mother's cabinets after bending too many spoons.
He looked back to the table and trembled. Brains bobbed in the liquid. Photographs of other Whispering Rock campers identified their owners. He found Morry, Gloria, Edgar, Lana, Dean, and Truman facing him, and when his gaze fell on the only empty, his picture grinned back at him.
"Let's get introductions underway," she said when Caligosto whimpered. "My name is Chloe, and this is Bobby. Since it seems you don't have any questions for us or you're too petrified to ask, we'll move ahead to the de-braining procedure. Then, you can be on your way to our party room." She pointed at the ceiling. "Your friend, Crispin, is waiting for you there along with your fellow PSI cadets. You can have cake and watch television as an apology for the inconvenience. Please mind your manners even when you're brainless, and don't touch anything that isn't yours."
Caligosto grunted, his lip curling. He jerked forward, his shoulders aching at the sudden motion. As soon as she said his friend's name, his last memories before everything went dark struck him. He had just arrived at the docks with Crispin. There, they had seen Edgar ambling up the steps, evidently in a trance. They had thought nothing of it, believing it to be one of Dean's confusing tricks before heading out to the floating dock.
But as soon as they finished canoeing over there, they were attacked. Something had struck Crispin and dragged him underwater. Caligosto only had time to dunk his head below the depths before feeling something sucking on his shirt. And then, the water had filled his throat, and he only saw an inky black hue, smelling something so rotten that he passed out.
Bobby snickered and squared his shoulders, towering over Caligosto. "Looks like you finally got the sitch, kid, but we got other brats to see before the night starts," he jeered and reached inside his lab coat. He removed what Caligosto could only describe as a pepper shaker, its contents glowing a green similar to Chloe's eyes. "Now, shushie, shushie, shut the hell up, and this won't hurt one bit."
As Bobby approached and set the shaker underneath his nose, Caligosto breathed in through his mouth. Chloe continued watching with the same neutral expression. Caligosto's mind ran through the different possibilities, feeling his heart squeeze in his chest. If they had kidnapped him to extricate his brain, then what they entailed could have been something deadly.
But then, another possibility clicked for Caligosto.
"Are you going to remove my psychic powers?" he cried with a smile so wide that his cheeks ached.
Bobby stopped in his tracks. He removed his hand from the nozzle, uttering, "What?"
"My psychic powers! De-braining! What else could you two have meant?" he shouted, bouncing in his seat. He sniffed the air, trying to suck up any stray pepper particles. "Come on, come on, if that's the case, let's go! I don't have all day. I'm not getting any younger wasting away in this chair."
Chloe's eyes widened. She tapped Bobby's shoulder, and he pulled back to her side. Caligosto frowned, demanding that he hurry up and remove his brain. She consulted her file on Caligosto, her brow furrowing while Bobby itched through his scalp, equally confused.
"Do you hate your powers?" she asked, lowering the clipboard to her waist. "It only says you're a bit…quirky about them."
"Well, duh! Who doesn't? Better to be a dentist than a psychic as my mom says," Caligosto replied, clicking his tongue. He nodded at the pepper shaker. "Hey, big guy! Don't stop now. Finish what you started like you're eating a helping of green beans!"
"The hell is with this kid? All the others screamed or tried fighting back," Bobby muttered to Chloe, and she shrugged.
"It seems to be a classic case of anti-psychic sentiments stemming from his family." She frowned at their captive. "What I don't understand is why you think we're removing your powers when this is hardly an operation."
He chuckled. "That's easy. If you guys do it, then I don't have to go under the knife." He pursed his lips. "Or well, the icepick."
"Ice-!" Chloe cut herself off and gulped down her sharp tone. "The icepick?"
Bobby sucked in a breath through his teeth. "Damn. They scheduled a lobotomy for you? I thought that the government outlawed that crap years ago."
"It's done under the table these days," she replied, and he shook his head, seemingly disappointed.
Caligosto's impatience grew. He tried tapping his heels together. He wanted to snap at them again, but judging by their confusion, it seemed he had miscalculated. If they weren't going to cure his psychic conundrum, then he sighed, no longer feeling dread or apprehension. If anything, losing his brain was a preferable path than what his parents had in store for him after camp.
Though, as Chloe and Bobby conversed with each other in low tones, he noticed something odd. Bobby also had a green eye and a red eye like him. If they switched sockets, then they would have been exactly like Caligosto's. Looking at Bobby up and down, he also observed their similar skin tones with Bobby having a few patches of pink scarring across his bare shoulders, knuckles, and jaw.
"Hey, big guy," Caligosto began with a grin.
Bobby flicked his head at him. "Yeah, what?"
"We look alike."
Chloe hummed at his comment. She glanced between Bobby and Caligosto, the former appearing as if he was a deer trapped in headlights. She reached over and gripped Caligosto's chin, lifting his head around and murmuring about his jaw structure. Releasing him, she gave Bobby her full, blank attention.
"Bobby," she said after taking in a deep breath, "is there something you want to tell me?"
He exploded. "Babe! I have no idea why we look the same! It's a total coincidence!" he shrieked, throwing his arms out. He flung the pepper shaker across the room, Chloe frown's deepening when it clattered to the floor. "I really don't know! It's weird, okay? Sure, it's like looking in a mirror, but I swear I dunno why Mini Me here looks like me!"
"Don't waste our resources," she ordered, and he immediately apologized. Levitating the pepper shaker off the ground, she examined it for any chips or cracks. "It's simply a small world. Genetics and coincidences can go hand-in-hand."
"Are you my real dad?" Caligosto chirped, and the squawk Bobby emitted even made Chloe cover her mouth, suppressing a bubble of laughter.
"No! Hell no! God no! I don't have kids! We don't have kids!" he shouted, snatching the pepper shaker out of her hands. He shoved it back underneath Caligosto's nose, seething. "Now, shut up and breathe, kiddo."
Chloe touched his shoulder. He scowled, deflating at her silent order. Bobby stepped aside and allowed Chloe to scrutinize him again. Caligosto felt his cheer evaporate under her gaze, which sent shivers down his spine the longer she made her observations.
"While we will not be removing your psychic abilities, I will ensure the camp counselors are aware of what may happen to you." She clicked her tongue. "Despite my misgivings about the Psychonauts, I doubt they'd allow such an operation to take place when they become aware of it." She moved aside, letting Bobby adjust the shaker under his nose. "Now, just relax. We don't want any unnecessary pain to occur during this procedure. Your mind is very important for our benefactor."
"But don't sweat the small stuff. Just have your cake and eat it, too," Bobby jeered, then cranked the shaker.
Immediately, as soon as Caligosto's mind wrapped around their implications, he breathed in thick, sour-smelling particles. Bobby laughed in his face, unable to hide his glee at Caligosto's torment. Caligosto breathed in again, feeling like his insides were on fire. A great pressure swelled in his stomach, then rose up his throat. His sinuses scorched, his nostrils flaring and heart thundering in his chest, only able to gasp and sputter in dire need of air.
When he finally sneezed, he felt weightless. And all he wanted to do was watch television.
("So, when we capture Raz and Lili, we'll leave a mental note for them to take proper care of that kid's conundrum.")
("Makes sense. We still got half a batch of campers to haul over here.")
("Right. Oh, Bobby? Before you put his body away with the others, maybe you should spend some quality time with your son.")
("Babe!")
("Just kidding.")
