Sargeant Renee Montoya's perspective:

"Mom's nagging me," said Sargeant Montoya during a dinner at a fast food restaurant with her partner, Detective Harvey Bullock.

"'Bout what?" asked Bullock.

"She's upset that I'm pushing thirty and still not close to getting married," explained Montoya. She was always overprotective."

"You could marry me," joked Bullock.

Montoya grinned. "I'm not shallow about fat people, but Dad is. Unlike Mom, he's more concerned with me ending up with the wrong guy than being alone forever. You have no idea how often I've heard, 'He's not good enough for you.' And unless you hit the treadmill and learn better English, it's coming your way."

"I was just screwin' with ya," laughed Bullock.

Suddenly, five policemen lead by Commissioner Ronald Studge entered the restaurant and moved towards Bullock and Montoya.

"People use phones these days, Commish," said Bullock.

"Cuff 'em," Studge commanded his officers. As Bullock and Montoya were being handcuffed, Studge added, "You're under arrest for aiding and abetting an infamous criminal. You two have a right to remain silent. Anything you say may be used against you in a court of law. You have a right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you at no cost to yourselves."

"Calm down," Montoya tried to cool Bullock's temper. Studge may have known they had been helping The Batman and his friends, but that did not mean that he could actually prove it. Resisting arrest was exactly what he wanted.

Two-Face's perspective:

The man who had once been known as Harvey Dent was lying down in his cell and trying to sleep when he heard the sound of a cell wall being sawed by an unusually quiet saw. It was doubtful the sound went beyond the cell door. Two-Face looked. A large segment of the wall had been extracted. This had apparently been done by a man in an ancient-looking hooded robe. This man kept his head slightly down so that the hood concealed his face. "Come with me if you want to be free," said the hooded man with a computerized voice, no doubt re-modulated by a voicebox.

Two-Face ran after him. "You could give The Batman lessons on rescues." The stranger did not reply. Eventually, they reached a car and drove away. Several minutes later, the car slowed down. It was obvious why - if anyone had spotted them as they escaped, they had lost them.

"What do I owe you for this, stranger?" asked Two-Face.

"I want to help you get revenge on The Batman and Becky 'The Hog' Traylor," said Two-Face's rescuer.

"Stop the car," demanded Two-Face. It halted. "If it seems too good to be true..."

"I want them out my way, too," explained the mystery man. "Batman is a thorn in my side and let's just say I have a bone to pick with The Hog. But few were willing to help me take care of both of them."

"Good enough," said Two-Face. "Drive on." The car drove again.

"I have a hideout picked out for you, Harvey," said the mystery man. "Get a few accomplices and wait for my word."

"Who do I tell the gang you are?" asked Two-Face.

"You don't," said the mystery man. "I'll tell soon enough."

This was odd as could be. But Two-Face was free to continue his criminal career. That was the important thing.

Lieutenant Marc Freeman's perspective:

As he clutched the bars of his jail cell, Marc Freeman realized that he had badly underestimated Commissioner Studge. Freeman had thought him to be no more than a "Yes-man," but he found out how Freeman, Bullock, and Montoya were sharing information with The Batman.

Freeman heard a quiet voice from the barred window of his cell say, "Over here." It was Batman. "I'll get you out, but you have to do exactly as I say."

"No," whispered Freeman. "We broke the law in helping you and are gonna be punished. You'd better forget about me, Bullock, Montoya, and do your usual duties."

"Surely you don't expect me to stand by as they send you to prison?" asked a surprised Batman.

"That's exactly what I expect - and I haven't been found guilty of anything yet," said Freeman. He took a deep breath. This would not be easy to explain to a civilian. "Listen, Batman, this is an embarrassing situation for me. But I have to go through it. I've been rounding people up and bringing them to justice since grade school. How can I take the easy way out now?"

"There won't be any justice," said Batman. "This town is run by a paranoid madman. And surely you'll encounter some old 'friends' in Blackgate Penitentiary."

"I know," said Freeman, gulping at that thought. "But I won't deny my uniform. Thanks for trying, but I can't accept this kind of help. I have to get out the right way."

Batman's perspective:

So Freeman had chosen to face the music. In truth Batman respected his decision. While Batman defended Gotham City from outside the law, Freeman was the law. Batman met his comrades back at the Batsub.

"They don't wanna come," said The Batgirl.

"Stupid," said The Catwoman.

"Don't judge," said Batgirl.

"Oh, I forgot," smiled Catwoman. "You're the daughter of an ex-cop."

"Look," said Robin. "There's a chance they'll get off, right?"

"Slim," said Batman. "They say they have witnesses to them talking to us without even trying to make an arrest."

"It could be a bluff," said Robin.

"It's not," said Batgirl faintly. "Dad told me that you don't make promises about witnesses that you can't keep. The defense will use that against you."

"This sucks," sighed Catwoman.

"Yes, it does," said Batman. "I never should have let them help us."

"It's not your fault," Catwoman tried to console him. "They wanted to help. Bullock and Montoya told us that. No one could have seen this coming. Not in a huge city like Gotham."

"I should have," insisted Batman. I'm so sorry, officers. I will clear your names somehow. I just don't know when.

Selina Kyle's perspective:

Barbara Gordon had driven Tim Drake back to Gotham yet Selina remained in Wayne Manor.

"How can he take it so hard?" asked Selina.

"Master Bruce blames himself for wildfires in Asian jungles," joked Alfred. "For three policemen to be behind bars for helping him may be more than he can bear."

"Then I should try to cheer him up," realized Selina. Alfred nodded.

Selina entered Bruce's room and heard the sounds of a shower. Selina waited for him to bathe, dress and come out.

Bruce was surprised to see Selina there. "Can I help you?" asked the perplexed man.

Got it backwards, sweety. Selina walked over to Bruce and pressed her body against his. "I'm your first cat or you'd know that we tend to nuzzle against people we like." They kissed.

Selina had never been one to get up early. She had been a cat-burglar for nearly all her adult life. Night was the time for that career to an even greater extent than her current line of work. So it was 10:23 the next morning when she got up. She spotted a note on a small table beside the bed:

Thank you, Selina. I needed that
Ask Alfred to prepare you
something if you ever wake up.

Selina smiled at the indirect comment about how late she slept. You've got a sense of humor after all, Bruce.

The Hog's perspective:

Joey Traylor entered Becky "The Hog" Traylor's office at her rebuilt American South-themed restaurant, Country Buffet. "You wanted me in here, Aunt Becky?"

The Hog nodded. "Ah'm gonna be workin' late tonight on the day Ah'm supposed to be takin' my kids to a fun place of their choice."

"Say no more," said Joey. "Ah remember you havin' to do this for me and Dad 'cause he was thought to be the heir to grandpa and missed a few promises."

The Hog sighed. "Kids never understand. Gonna be tough to face mine tomorrow."

"Ah'll tell 'em how sorry you our, Aunt Becky," promised Joey. "Anything else?"

"Any word on my Little Bat?" asked The Hog.

"We've got word he tried to rescue those cops who were in cahoots with him," explained Joey. "They decided they wanna be in jail."

"Idiots," said The Hog. "You can go." Joey did.

The Hog hoped her children would forgive her. As for Batman, the good news was that he was alive. Bad news? He had not been caught and left with no choice but to accept The Hog's help and affections.

Luke Traylor's perspective:

"We had a great time, Joey," said a happy Luke as he and his sister, Marcia, were taken away from Kiddy Land, a place with electronic games, lower-tech activities, and a restaurant, all geared towards children.

"Anything for my cousins," smiled Joey to his young cousins.

"Wish Mama could've come," lamented Marcia.

"She wanted to, trust me," vowed Joey. "You'll understand someday." As they neared Joey's car, his phone rang. "Get in. Ah gotta take this."

Luke and Marcia got in. "Ah had more fun," said Luke.

"Ah had more fun," said Marcia.

"Me!"

"Me!"

"Meeeee!"

Before this argument escalated further, the car had started driving. "Sorry, Joey," apologized Luke and Marcia, knowing that their older cousin would not approve of them shouting at each other over nothing.

But then the driver turned to face them, revealing a man with a half-scarred head. "You're grounded, brats," he smiled evilly at them.

"Ew," exclaimed Marcia. "That's gotta hurt!"

"Shut up, Marcia," said Luke. "We ain't supposed to talk to strangers."

The driver flipped a coin and drew a pistol. "Then the coin says that you can talk to this."

Luke and Marcia hugged each other in terror. "It'll be OK, just don't make 'im mad," said Luke, knowing that he had to take care care of his little sister. But he knew full well that they were in terrible danger.

"Call us Two-Face," the scarred driver identified himself. "We're enemies of your mother. She and your grandpa made us the men we are tonight. We want revenge. And thanks to you, we're gonna get it. But you don't have to be alive. Our other personality would cry himself to death if we ended you, but that's just more motivation for me. No trouble, brats!"

Luke and Marcia nodded slowly. That night had gone south for them really quickly!

The Hog's perspective:

"What's the matter with you?" asked The Hog, who was being visited at Country Buffet by her nephew. "You said Ah needed to stay here 'cause of somethin' important, but now you're quiet. What's goin' on."

"A... A... Ah got ambushed," explained joey. "The kids have been taken away. Ah'm so sorry."

"It ain't your fault," said The Hog, clenching her fists in grief. "Ah gotta lotta enemies. Should've known and not sent anybody in what should've been my place."

"Here, Aunt Becky," Joey handed her a note. "Found this in my shirt pocket." The Hog read it.

Dear fat piece of white trash,
meet me on Lead Lane
Tomorrow at eight. I'll trade you
For the smaller trash. Otherwise,
they go in a can. Signed, Two-Face

"Sumbitch," cried The Hog. "Why the Hell didn't Ah keel the piece of shit when Ah had the chance? She-ut! Papa's dead 'cause of him. And 'cause Ah failed him. Now he's got my kids. If Ah let 'im waste Luke and Marcia too, Ah don't wanna go on livin'."

"What are you sayin'?" asked Joey.

The Hog paused. "We're makin' the trade. No arguments, Joey. Get your father in here." Joey did just that.

"Ah'll leave you two alone," Joey bid his father and aunt goodbye.

"After tomorrow," said The Hog, "You're in charge."

"Becky, no," said Al. "Watchin' 'im take Dad away from us was bad enough. Not you."

"Those are my kids he's got," said The Hog. "What if it had been Joey and he wanted to trade for you?"

"Ah'd probably do the same thing you're doin'," Al admitted.

Batman's perspective:

The next evening, Batman and Robin were spying on the second floor windows of Country Buffet.

"The Hog's in a bad mood," realized Batman.

"But why?" asked Robin.

"I intend to find out," resolved Batman. "Wait here." He Batgrappled to the window of The Hog's office, opened the window. This time he did not bother trying to be quiet. The Hog always seemed to know he was there. She had a crush on him and seemed to know him as well as a woman would know her boyfriend. Batman feared at times that the feeling was mutual, despite The Hog's enormous, if extremely muscular, girth. Now that Batman was in a relationship, feelings for the murderous gangster were especially forbidden.

"What brings you here this time, Little Bat?" asked The Hog as she swiveled around to face him.

"You're upset," said Batman. "Why?"

"It's your imagination," said The Hog. Ordinarily, she lied like a politician, but this time, Batman saw through it.

"I don't think so," said Batman.

"Ah ain't got no time to wipe the floor with you again," said The Hog.

"You know that's the only way to get me," said Batman. That's right. Attack! Then I'll be able to squeeze it out of you.

But The Hog controlled her temper. "Ah said, get out!" As Batman walked away, The Hog added, "Wait. You know my feelings. Have Ah ever... tempted you?"

Batman faced her. Unable to say no, The Dark Knight asked, "Why do you ask?"

"No reason," grinned The Hog. "You can go. Ah got my answer."

As Batman climbed back into the window, The Hog revealed. "You always hit my sweet spot!"

Meeting back up with Robin, The Boy Wonder said, "So what's eating her?"

"Something is," said Batman. "Something that, it goes without saying, could be trouble. Call Batgirl and Catwoman. Ask where they are and have them wait for you. I'll keep an eye on The Hog myself. One person has a better chance of going unnoticed."

Robin called Batgirl and Catwoman, then left upon having been told where they were. Batman kept an eye on The Hog's office. Eventually, she, Al, and Joey all left Country Buffet in the same car. Suspicious.

To avoid being spotted, Batman followed on foot and with Batgrapple. This plan failed failed. The car sped up , took every possible turn, and frequently moved around cars. Eventually, Batman lost the Traylors.

The Hog's perspective:

"Yee-haw," cried Al. "Ah've lost the sumbitch. Sure wish Ah could get you outta all your trouble, Sis."

"You've done enough," said The Hog. "What happened to my kids is my fault. But Ah can make it right... Ah hope." They reached Lead Lane. Two-Face and two of his men were there with Luke and Marcia.

Al stopped the car. He, The Hog, and Joey got out.

"Mama," cried Luke and Marcia.

"You first," insisted Two-Face. The Hog slowly walked towards him. "Careful," Two-Face said to his men. "The fat chick from Dixie may not look like it, but she's one of the strongest people in the world! They do come faster, though. Keep your guns on 'er and we'll be fine."

"Only Ah won't, right?" asked The Hog. "What are you waitin' for? Turn the kids loose!"

"We don't have to," said Two-Face.

"You wouldn't," shouted Joey.

Two-Face flipped his coin. The clean side won. "Of course not. Go to the men over there, dear children, and have a safe night." The children ran towards Al and Joey.

"What about Mama?" asked Marcia.

"No," screamed Luke as he tried to run towards the criminals holding his mother hostage, only for Al to hold him back.

"She wants this," said Al. "She's given her life for you. Don't forget her. Don't let your kids forget. Then you'll never really lose her."

"Take me to your place now," demanded The Hog to Two-Face. "Don't make this any harder on them than it already is."

Two-Face at least allowed her that. Becky "The Hog" Traylor was taken to the warehouse that Two-Face now called home. Because of her incredible strength, The Hog was placed in a room and chained to a stretcher.

"Y'know, if Ah'd had the guts to shoot that rottin' head of yours off," The Hog took a parting shot, "And trust that your men wouldn't have had the stones to shoot the hostages, you never would've had a chance."

Two-Face laughed. "If you think you're upset now that you didn't, just wait!"

"What are you waitin' for?" asked The Hog. "Do it, you asshole!"

"Patience, flabby," said Two-Face. He left. After awhile, a man in a hooded robe. entered the robe and stood on the stretcher, straddling The Hog.

"You ain't scarin' me, Two-Face," snorted The Hog. "Ah know it's you."

"It's not me," said Two-Face from outside. "Now that's cleared up, We'll leave you two alone."

The robed man threw back his hood, unstrapped a voicebox from his throat, and looked down on The Hog.

It was Al.

The Hog gasped. "You?"

"Me," said Al. "Ah'm the one who busted Two-Face outta the clink. Ah'm how he knew where your kids would be."

The world stood still. The Hog had been betrayed to her death by her own brother. She had to know more before that happened. "If you've been behind all this, how come you tried to talk me out of tradin' myself away?"

"Because Ah knew you expected me to," said Al.

The Hog chuckled. "Ah can't believe Ah didn't see it comin'. Ah knew of your discontent. The fact that Ah almost let myself die when The Scarecrow and Kalibak wrecked our precious, original, restaurant, and you didn't do nothin' to stop me from committin' suicide."

"Of course you couldn't put two and two together, Sis," said Al. "That Russian we put outta business two years ago may have been a sexist asshole, but he was right about one thing. You're weak."

"That's why you betrayed me, huh?" realized The Hog.

"And that you were never going to put loyalty to our..." said Al before The Hog cut him off.

"How dare you talk about loyalty?" asked an exasperated Hog. "You who allied with a sworn enemy of our family, kidnapped my kids, am ready to help him kill your own sister? But first, seriously, why? Please tell me it's not that Papa makin' me the boss hurt your ego this much."

"It ain't that," said Al. "You squander opportunity after opportunity. First time you met The Batman, you beat 'im, and that takes some doin'. He should've gone to Heaven then and there. That episode's been playin' out again and again for years. You gotta schoolgirl crush on that obstacle between us and control of this here joint and won't grow out of it."

"Half the girls in town do," said The Hog.

"Half the girls ain't head of our family," said Al. "Ah got to thinkin' maybe Ah needed to do this when we elected a puppet Mayor and you gave him up."

"Has guilt rotted your brain?" asked The Hog. "Ah had to give him up to save you."

"Ah know," said Al. "Ah was glad to die for the family, but you didn't have the nerve. Then Bats' face on Gotham's Most Wanted gave me an idea of teamin' with the cops to get rid of him once and for all! You shot down that idea on arrival. Face it, you can't kill him. You're too soft to put your feelins aside and get another guy."

"So because you think your sister's let down the family, you turned on her, your nephew, and your niece," said The Hog, getting angrier by the second. "What a family man you are."

"Exactly," said Al. "Ah do believe Two-Face's men have spotted your Little Bat comin' here. Must've picked up your trail. We'll see if he comes to your rescue or if you and the man you love more than your own family are to die together."

Batman's perspective:

Batman had found the car that Two-Face had taken The Hog away in near a warehouse. As much as few would have missed Gotham's leading gangster, Batman could not let Two-Face kill her. But when it was over, Batman had to be ready to fight The Hog off. This would be all the excuse she needed to show her "gratitude" with strength-based seduction.

Batman entered through a window. He saw what looked like Two-Face and tackled him.

A mannequin. It's a trap!

Too late. Before Batman had even gotten up, he felt two shots rip into him. Only his armored suit kept him alive. But five men then moved in and subdued him with punches. Batman saw that the leaders were Two-Face and Al Traylor.

"You've turned on your own sister?" asked a surprised Batman to Al. "I didn't think you sink this low."

"Speaking of her," said Al, "Do you return her affections? Ah sure hope so, 'cause you're dyin' together as a last favor to her."

Batman was taken into a room to see The Hog chained to a stretcher.

"We've always been linked, Little Bat," smiled The Hog. "Deny it if you want, but it's the truth. Guess this is a fittin' way to go out."

"Ah'd rather not hurt you anymore, Sis," said Al, "So you'll get it first."

"Not so fast," said Two-Face. "We have to flip."

"She's a killer," said Al. "Not that I ain't one, but don't that mean Harvey Dent hates her as much as Two-Face?"

"Yeah," said Two-Face. "But Dent believes that everyone is innocent until proven guilty." He flipped a coin. "She gets a trial for the crimes she's committed."

"Give 'er nothin," insisted Al. "Just let me shoot 'er. Please, the longer this takes the more it'll..." Two-Face pointed a pistol at him. "...Hurt."

"You interfere, you get whacked first," threatened Two-Face. He handed a list to one of his men. "Boys, you've got the witnesses. We also want the furniture of a courtroom. Batman will defend The Hog. He wins, The Hog roams free again. He loses, they eat lead burgers."

"Fittin'," Al had to admit. "This don't change nothin', Sis. It just delays the inevitable. And our pain."

Two-Face cut off Batman's belt with a pocketknife. "Get the medicine out," requested The Hog. Two-Face searched through pouches until he got some medicine for treating wounds and left it on the ground. He took the belt out of the room, leaving Batman and The Hog locked together, with no way to escape with Batman's tools and The Hog's strength gone.

"Defend you?" asked Batman.

"Eh-eh," said The Hog. "First things first. Treat your wounds. Before they get any worse." Batman used the medicine to do this. The wounds inflicted by Two-Face and Al's shots burned for a moment before easing a bit.

"Ah had to nag my late husband 'bout seein' a doctor," grinned The Hog. "What is it with men that they won't get treated on time, especially in front of a woman?"

"As I was saying," said Batman, "Defend you? You're a gangster."

"A gangster that you can't turn down this time," cackled The Hog. "By the way, seein' as how Ah'm chained down and you're a dominant man..."

"Don't even think about it," said Batman.

Daisy Thompson's perspective:

Daisy Thompson (cousin of The Hog and Al) was awakened by hands on her arms. She was being dragged away by three men.

"You're gonna regret this," she said. "Do you know who you're dealin' with?"

"Better than you know," said one of the men. "Relax," we just want you to testify."

"No court's gonna accept a testimony that you got like this," said Daisy. No answer. Instead, she was being taken out of her house, loaded in a car and driven away.

This don't make no sense. Why get me for a testimony if it ain't gonna count? These can't be agents. Were they kiddin' around about me testifyin'?

Barbara Gordon's perspective:

Barbara was getting ready to go to work the next morning when her phone rang. "Hello?"

"Sorry to wake you so early," said Selina Kyle, "But this is an emergency! Alfred says Bruce never came back last night."

"What?" asked Barbara. "Why?"

"Don't know," said Selina. "I called Tim. He says Bruce was following the Traylors somewhere."

"Oh, no," Barbara realized what that had to mean. "Suit up. Tim's gotta go to school It'll look too suspicious if he's neither there nor sick at home.

"If Bruce's dead," said Selina, "There'll be Hell to pay."

Batgirl's perspective:

Batgirl and Catwoman saw Al Traylor working in The Hog's office.

"I don't get it," said Catwoman. "What's he doing there?"

"Let's find out," said Batgirl.

They went through a window, sneaked up behind Al, and turned his chair around to face them.

"This is serious and you're a married man," said Batgirl, "So keep those eyes up and listen. Why are you running your family business and where's The Batman?"

"Ah don't know anything about Bats," said Al. "As for my sister, she's on vacation."

And I can only guess what that "vacation" is. Poor Batman, always attracting the wrong ones.

"You better sing, canary," threatened Catwoman as she showed Al her claws, "Or you're a cat's bird."

"Forget it," said Batgirl. "He's the kind of family criminal who'll die before talking. I've got a better idea. Let's go." They left.

Batgirl and Catwoman kept watching The Hog's office. Eventually, Al left. But his workday was not even close to finished. Batgirl entered it and saw that Al had left his South Carolina Gamecocks hat behind (it was not proper business attire) and placed a Bat Tracer in a fold of cloth inside it. With luck, Al would lead Batgirl and Catwoman to Batman.

Back where Catwoman was waiting, Batgirl said, "Barbara and Selina have time to kill until he's off work."

"No thanks," said Catwoman.

"Live a little. There's nothing we can do for Batman in the meantime anyway. Besides, from past experience, The Hog won't let him get killed until a long while of him refusing to get involved with her. We've time."

Batman's perspective:

"What's the matter, Little Bat?" asked The Hog hours later. "You're my... lawyer, Ah guess, but you ain't said two words to me today."

"Understand me, Hog" said Batman. "This is business and a mutual need. Nothing more."

Two-Face entered the room. "It's time," he said. One of his men pushed The Hog on her stretcher to the core of the warehouse. Batman was handcuffed and lead to that same place by the other two.

This area looked very, very different. There were tables and stands for a judge and witness. Al, wearing a judge's robe, climbed up the judge's stand with a gavel.

"You're the judge?" asked The Hog.

"No talkin' in court," Al banged his gavel. "Shut up or Ah'll hold you in contempt or somethin'."

"Ah don't think we can get a fair trial," whispered The Hog.

"Considering what you've been doing your whole life," whispered Batman, "I hope you can see the irony." Still, he knew that not even Becky "The Hog" deserved this.

"OK, Two-Face," said Al. "Start prosecutin'."

Two-Face sighed. "Dammit, Al, you're supposed to mention the charges and say, 'Court is now in session.'"

"Gimme a break," said Al. "Ah don't watch courtroom dramas. Why are lookin' at me like Ah'm an idiot?"

"Because you are an idiot," Batman heard The Hog whispering to herself.

"Never mind," said Two-Face. "We'll call our first witness."

Batgirl's perspective:

The Batmobile trailed the electronic signal that the Bat Tracer was giving off. Suddenly, Batgirl hit the brakes.

"Why are we stopping?" asked Catwoman.

"Because Al left the Bat Tracer in a police station," said Batgirl.

"Is he being questioned?" asked Catwoman.

"No, he's left it in there to get us in trouble," said Batgirl. The sirens of police cars began sounding. "And I've figured this out too late." She turned the Batmobile around and hit the gas.

Batgirl opened the front shield. "Look behind us. Are we being chased?"

Catwoman took a quick look behind and said, "Yeah. So much for our rescue mission."

Fortunately, the cars were no match for the top end of the Batmobile. By the time it reached the other end of town, all its tails had been long since shaken.

"Al's getting better," Batgirl admitted. "May not have gotten us caught, but he did lose us. Now we're back to having no leads."

"No," screamed Catwoman. "There's gotta be something. There's gotta... poor Batman."

"Yeah," said Batgirl. She knew Catwoman had to be taking this even harder.

Stay alive, Batman. We need you!

Batman's perspective:

Batman had to learn faster than he ever had in his life. He had to excel as a lawyer even though his trades were business and fighting crime. His life depended on it.

"There's no doubt in your mind your that Mrs. Traylor runs the organization that got your husband killed for failing the assignment?" asked Two-Face to a woman on the witness stand.

"None," said the woman. "I loved him so much. She took him from me." She pointed at The Hog.

"Did you?" whispered Batman.

"It's hard to keep all the cases like this straight," whispered The Hog.

I thought you had.

Two-Face walked over to Batman. "Your witness."

"You said my..." Batman still had a hard time wrapping his mind around this. "...My client employed your husband, but you also said he was part of a chop shop. But The Hog ran no chop shops until she took over the mobs two years ago."

"I didn't know that," said the woman.

"Do you know for a fact if that chop shop was owned by the Traylors?" asked Batman.

The woman paused for a few seconds before saying, "No, I don't."

"Objection," stated Two-Face. "She has not said that it wasn't either, and given this family's dominance of the Gotham underworld, it's very likely she was responsible for the death of this young lady's husband."

"The prosecution has the full burden of proof," countered Batman. "You should know that, Harvey."

"Sustained," said Al. "Since this testimonies burns my sister, why not just shoot 'em and be done with it?"

"Because Mr. Batman is in the right," Two-Face growled in frustration. "I don't like it anymore than you, but it's the rules. Anytime you make a ruling that is obviously wrong, we flip. If that weenie Dent wins, we withdraw our case."

"Ah'm makin' the same mistake again and again," said a frustrated Al. "First Ah let Bats soften up my sister for years, then Ah get with a guy who's got a borin', self-righteous, do-gooder side to his personality. Overruled."

With the court accepting that The Hog had not necessarily caused the death of the witness' husband, Batman obviously had no further questions.

"The people withdraw a pair of witnesses who Mr. Batman can use the same arguments against," Two-Face admitted. "But we have one who won't be so easily dismissed."

Two-Face's men brought Daisy Thompson to the witness stand. "Pushy assholes," complained Daisy.

"Do you swear to tell the truth?" asked Al. Batman knew that was not the full question that was intended to guarantee a witness' honesty. This is by far the sloppiest "trial" I ever heard of!

"Yeah," said Daisy.

Batman quietly noted, "She looked liked like she was taking that very seriously."

"Ah know," whispered The Hog. "She never had the stomach for extralegal shit even though she was good at marketin'. That's why she'll never have a shot at runnin' the business. Ah fear she's gonna be too big a coward to protect me."

"Character is not cowardice," disagreed Batman. But The Hog was right. This testimony may have been about to make this an indefensible case.

"Did an attack on former District Attorney Harvey Dent scar him for life years ago?" asked Two-Face.

"Don't you remember?" asked a surprised Daisy. "It was you who was scarred."

"For the record," Two-Face pushed the matter.

Unlike Al, Two-Face loves law. Half of him does, anyway.

"Y-yes," confirmed Daisy.

"Why did it happen?" asked Two-Face.

"DA's have enemies," said Daisy.

"Do you have reason to believe that you know who ordered the attack on Mr. Dent?" asked Two-Face.

"N..." Daisy froze for a moment. "Ah'm sorry, Becky. Yeah, she ordered the attack."

"Objection," said Batman. "Why does she believe this?"

Al hesitated before uneasily saying, "Sustained."

"She talked about it after the fact," said Daisy. The proverbial knife was in the flesh.

"No further questions," said Two-Face.

Batman walked towards Daisy. I can't defend The Hog against that. I had a feeling this was coming. Wait! There might be one thing.

"You're certain your cousin was behind the attack that scarred Mr. Dent?" asked Batman.

"Yeah," said Daisy.

"Why did she attack?" asked Batman.

"How come you're not objectin'?" interjected Al with a look at Two-Face.

"Motive is relevant," Two-Face set Al straight.

"Becky wanted to stop Dent from handling the case against Uncle Reggie, the boss before her," explained Daisy. "What does it matter?"

"Good question," said Al. "Gimme a reason to let you punch holes in her right now or Ah'll end this."

Two-Face made no response. Batman needed to answer. "The slightest detail may be important."

Al made no move to end the cross-examination, so Batman continued, "Did taking Dent out of action necessarily mean killing him?" asked Batman.

"No, I don't think so," said Daisy.

"Objection," said Two-Face. "He used a knife."

"It could've been used only to injure you," said Batman.

"You don't believe that," laughed Two-Face.

"It's unlikely but possible," said Batman. Turning to Daisy he said, "How long a sentence do you think aggravated assault should get?"

"Years in prison," Daisy smiled, evidently figuring out Batman's plan.

"But this 'court' wants death sentences," said Batman.

"Where did Ah go wrong," Al despaired.

"Any more witnesses?" asked Batman.

"No," said Two-Face. "But we only agreed to let you go if you won the case, not turn ourselves in." He flipped his coin. Scarred side came up. He used a pocketknife to cut The Hog free and unlocked Batman's handcuffs with a key. "It's on!"

Al and Two-Face's men drew guns, But as Batman rushed the three henchmen to knock their guns away, The Hog picked up and threw the stretcher that she had previously been contained with at the judge's stand, knocking it - and Al over.

Punches and kicks finished Two-Face's men. A boxing combination from Two-Face himself knocked Batman down to a knee, but he caught Two-Face's arm by the wrist as the next punch was attempted. Batman countered with a body blow, right cross, backhand, and headbutt to knock Two-Face out.

The Hog's perspective:

The Hog saw that Al had painfully gotten out from under the fallen stand and was crawling to reach the gun that he had dropped when he fell. As he got it, The Hog's right foot fastened it to the ground.

"You OK, big brother?" asked The Hog. Despite her compassionate words, she was still extremely angry with her sibling.

"Do it," said Al. "Make me pay for betrayin' you. Maybe then you'll get it in you to cook Bats for supper. Hell, do 'im first. You got a gun down there. Two-Face took his toys away."

The Hog looked at Batman. That would have made things so much easier. But he had saved her life. The Hog kicked Al out. She walked up to Batman with a smile. "This is the second time you've saved me."

"To save myself," said Batman.

"Ain't the whole story," said The Hog. She was face-to-face with him. It was hard to tell if he was going for her or not.

"I'm surprised I didn't have to pull you off your brother," said Batman.

"Ah'd be lyin' if Ah said Ah wasn't more pissed than a western buffalo," admitted The Hog.

"Bison."

"Whatever, Professor Batman."

"If you hate him so much, why did you spare him?"

"No matter what he did to me, he's still my brother."

As The Hog leaned forward, Batman stopped her with an interesting question: "Do you realize now what comes of your trade?"

The Hog thought. She walked over to Al and picked him up as she did. "Ah'll take him in, Little Bat. Just as you would've..." Batman was gone. "Coward!"

Bruce's perspective:

"So that's why it took me so long to get back," said Bruce in his mansion to Alfred, Barbara, Tim, and Selina.

"I shouldn't have underestimated your ability to get out tight spots," said Selina as she put a hand on Bruce's shoulder.

"This time," said Bruce, "Batman can't take all the credit. The Hog probably could have killed him. She didn't."

"What else is new?" asked Barbara. "That overweight girl's helplessly in love."

"It was more than that," suggested Bruce. "I got a sense of doubt. That her belief that the terrible things she did were made up for by country/family values might be wrong. Almost as if for the first time, she's questioning the path Reggie Traylor put her on from birth."

"You're not suggesting she could change?" asked Tim.

"I did," Selina reminded everyone.

"Indeed," said Alfred. "People can change, but it would not be wise to bet the house on it."