Batman's perspective:
The brief periods of no archcriminals on the loose were cherished by The Batman, although thanks to the arrest orders on him and his allies these days, less so.
But Batman had instincts. They told him something very big was soon to go down!
"You're scared, big guy," said The Catwoman as they was watched for crimes from a rooftop.
"No, I'm not," insisted Batman. "Just concerned something very bad is about to happen."
"In most cities, I'd call you paranoid," smiled Catwoman. " But in Gotham, if you're not worried, you're stupid."
The Hog's perspective:
Becky "The Hog" Traylor had called her nephew, Joey, and family accountant/lawyer Yuji Takahan.
"First things first," The Hog looked sympathetically at Joey. "Joey, Ah hope you understand why your father's in jail."
"Yeah," said Joey. "He did wrong. Can't blame you."
The Hog nodded. "Still, this can't be easy for you."
"It ain't," confirmed Joey. He walked over to his aunt, who got out of her desk and the two hugged.
"Very touching," said Yuji. "But what does this have to do with me?"
"The Batman saved my life yesterday," explained The Hog. "Ah wanna do 'im a favor. Those cops who just got arrested for helpin' him?"
"Will do," promised Yuji.
"Tell 'em it's on me," said The Hog. "Go." Yuji left for the Gotham City Detention Center.
"Am Ah excused too?" asked Joey.
"No," said The Hog, thoughtfully putting her hands on her hips. "Ah've been thinkin' of my brother's betrayal and how so many back home said that no matter how traditional we were, we weren't a true Southern family."
"They were wrong," said Joey.
"That's what Ah thought," said The Hog. "But when a woman can't even trust her brother..."
"So we're goin' legit?" asked Joey.
"Did Ah say we were makin' any changes?" asked The Hog. "Ah wanna think about this. Ah'll let you know."
Lieutenant Marc Freeman's perspective:
Freeman, Detective Harvey Bullock, and Sargeant Renee Montoya had been indicted and the jury had been selected. It was time to start forming their strategy with their lawyer, Anita Boggs.
Suddenly, a guard and an Asian man entered the room. "Sorry to butt in," said the guard, "But another lawyer's apparently late." The guard left and shut the door to the room for inmates and their lawyers.
"Come to gloat to the fallen cops, Takahan?" asked Montoya.
"Actually, I'm here to help," said Yuji Takahan.
"I'll get out any way I can," said Bullock, "But I don't think we can afford you."
"My boss is paying," said Yuji.
But Freeman was very suspicious of the mob lawyer's offer. "What do you want?"
"It's a favor she owes to a friend of yours," said Yuji. "No strings attached."
"There better not be," said Freeman.
"Hold on," said Anita. "I don't trust this one."
"Maybe not," Yuji smiled. "But at least I get clients off."
"My clients are gangsters," said Anita. "They're troubled souls who need help and dammit, I get it for them."
"So you say," chuckled Yuji.
"Enough," declared Freeman. "You're working together on this case."
"Seeing as how my success rate is so much greater than Mrs. Boggs' and she's compromised by having to care for her son and stay-at-home husband," argued Yuji, "I think I'd be slowed down by her."
"He may not know different," said Anita, "But I do. We don't need this slime dirtying up on our case."
"Anita's ethical and pleasant personality will make for a fine opening statement and closing argument," said Freeman. "Yuji will handle the case itself. No arguments. We're the clients. We make the decisions. Get along."
Anita and Yuji obviously did not like each other, but neither did they object.
Poison Ivy's perspective:
Poison Ivy was a patient woman. She had spent the last few months growing a pot of roses in Arkham Asylum's laboratory. She smiled. It was time.
"Let them smell you," said Ivy. Because of the pheromones and venom throughout her body, Ivy was forced to wear a radiation suit outside of her cell, but that would no longer be an impediment. She took the roses around Arkham. The guards, lab workers, and other inmates grew sick.
"Don't worry," grinned Ivy as she took a keycard away from a sickly and fallen guard's pocket. "This aroma won't kill you. It won't even hurt in the long run. You even have an excuse for lying down on the job. All it does is give me my ticket out of here."
And so it was. Ivy walked out of the lab and as she was being spied on by a security camera, she lied, "I do believe these roses aren't my best work." Because no one would be able to disprove that this was an accident that Ivy took advantage of, the guards were not allowed to use guns, so all who tried to thwart her escape suffered the same fate as those in the lab. At one point, Ivy had taken the keys of a guard she recognized. This enabled her to heist a car, exit the institution, and drive away.
Ivy smiled on the drive to Gotham. She was free for the first time in the longest time since her career as an eco-crusader had begun. But next came the hard part. That career of hers had been very frustrating. No matter how well she had planned things out, The Batman and his allies, particularly The Batgirl, had always managed to thwart her. True, she managed to bring The Dark Knight to death's door in their first meeting, but that was Ivy's last true success story.
The last failure she had never forgiven herself for. It was the time she and her friend, Harley Quinn, had manipulated the godlike beast known as Bizarro into their service. They defeated all their enemies, but Ivy accepted a surrender from Batman that her instincts told her was insincere. It was believed by most to be arrogant joy on Ivy's part at seeing her foes give up.
But Poison Ivy knew part of it was a desire to remain an innocent girl on some level. So she let Batman and his friends live to concoct a plan that freed Bizarro from Harley and Ivy's control. Ivy had the world and its salvation under her green thumb. But she let it slip away because she could not bear the shame of killing a man who seemed to be begging for his life. She would not make that mistake again. Saviors of the world did not get to be innocent. They had to make hard choices. Like the ones Ivy already had made.
Mayor Charles Falsootu's perspective:
"I don't want to hear any excuses," said the Mayor. "Ten months of this is enough. You have two more to catch Batman. That's a year's time. If you can't do it after that... Gordon should've shown you that no one's irreplaceable."
"We're doing our best," promised Commissioner Ronald Studge.
"Apparently, that's not enough," said Falsootu. "What's wrong with you? Have you no heart or determination? I want heroes on the force. What do I have? Bored federal mules. I want Batman caught or dead. Is that clear?"
"Yes, Sir," said Falsootu.
Falsootu hung up. "No wonder some people are crazy enough to buy into those costumed psychotics, what with the scrubs in the GCPD!"
"My tax dollars at work," agreed a feminine voice behind Falsootu and to his right. He looked in that direction. Poison Ivy stood in the corner of the office, smiling with her arms folded.
Falsootu knew what to do in this situation, but he was surprised to see Ivy do nothing about Falsootu getting his communicator. "Security?" No answer. "Security?"
Ivy kept smiling. "Love truly does conquer all. By the way, I hope, for your sake, that you realize that I'm just as out of your league as Batman. Sorry if you feel blue-balled, your honor."
Falsootu did not bother calling the police. They would take too long and behind the security guards and her seductive powers, Poison Ivy would likely defeat them as well. "What do you want?" Falsootu insisted.
"Relax," Ivy made an open-palm gesture with both hands in peace. "We are kindred, you and me. You know those loose cannons are threats to the city. They have been stopping me from saving the planet for years. I also know the police can't catch them, and that it's costing this city a lot of money. You can eat a hundred million dollars over the next two months or you can give it to me. Do so and in return, I'll send you some corpses for you to gloat over to the public, not to mention guarantee yourself a landslide reelection! Meanwhile, I'll leave this Hellhole behind to purify the planet. You'll never see me again."
Falsootu's gut told him that he could not beat this deal with a stick, but his head remained suspicious. "I need evidence of your trustworthiness before I'll deal with a terrorist," said Falsootu.
"Terrorist?" asked Ivy as she walked towards Falsootu. He felt a strange but pleasant sensation as Ivy drew near.
"I'm no terrorist," Ivy assured Falsootu. "I'm fighting to save Mother Earth from the forces of greed and neglect ravaging her. And the peaceful way has been tried for two generations and failed. I'm not a terrorist any more than the people who founded this great country of ours were."
Falsootu would have at least partially disagreed if not for the desire he felt for this woman. "I-I don't even know you."
Ivy wrapped her arms around Falsootu's neck. "Then get to know me." It felt like pleasurable electricity was flowing through Falsootu.
"I'm married," Falsootu made his last attempt to stop Ivy.
"Don't you have a girlfriend for Friday nights anyway?" asked Ivy as she kissed him. All thoughts of resistance vanished from Falsootu's mind.
"You've got a deal," smiled an ecstatic Falsootu.
"Good," Ivy smiled with an open mouth. "Just expect to hire new security guards. The ones you have now can't live without me."
Hey, they didn't do such a good job of stopping her, so good riddance.
Yuji Takahan's perspective:
"...And so," Anita concluded her opening statement in court, "When all that can be said is said, I trust that this jury will come to realize that there is no reason to suspect these brave officers of wrongdoing and that attempting to aid a hero like The Batman is no real crime anyway."
So she's quite the paragon of legal virtue that she seems. In both claiming that our clients didn't help The Batman and that it's actually good if they did, she's arguing in the alternative, or as laymen would say, being a hypocrite.
"As Mr. Jones and Mrs. Boggs have made their opening statement," said the balding, white-haired Judge Ray Thomas, "This court is adjourned for today." He banged his gavel. Freeman, Bullock, and Montoya were escorted back to jail.
As Yuji and Anita walked out of the courthouse together, Yuji had no choice but to compliment his nagging his disagreeable partner. "Fine opening statement, but we won't need you for awhile." He immediately realized that he had done it wrong.
"I can still give advice," said Anita.
"Save it," said Yuji. "You judged what I did yet used contradictory arguments to start things up. That is not a class act way to start."
Anita glared at him. "Just because I'm saying that they weren't aiding and abetting Batman doesn't mean I was saying that it was the end of the world. And I'm not going to be judged by a mob lawyer."
"Whatever you say, Madam," laughed Yuji. He sensed that he had gotten to Anita. That was what he wanted.
Poison Ivy's perspective:
In the week that had passed since Poison Ivy had received the hundred million dollars in gold bricks (which she had sold on the black market), she and the henchmen she had seduced away from Falsootu's employ had been at work. They had acquired a lot of greenery, both from stores and the arms of greenery in the forest they had lodged in. True, Ivy hated doing this to plants, but it was not killing them. Besides, it was for the greater good.
Finally, it was time for Ivy's experiment. In the clearing of a forest north of Gotham, she and her men had hardened leaves and bark to create a "Plant zombie." He had a monstrous appearance, but if all went well, no one would laugh at him for long.
"I'll do the honors," Ivy flipped the switch. Through a tube hooked up to the plant man flowed a mix of seven potent liquids. Within minutes, it had all been injected into the plant zombie and he stood up.
"Follow me," said Ivy as she lead everyone in the room outside. Since he lacked a brain, the plant zombie was nearly mindless. So Ivy needed to make sure he at least had great strength. She pointed to a cinder block. "Lift that with one hand if it's not too much trouble, honey." The zombie did so. The cinder block seemed as light as a marble.
"Hold here to await new orders, my loyal soldier," commanded Ivy with pride. The zombie nodded. Ivy turned to her men. "Boys, this experiment has been a complete success." Ivy clapped her hands; her lovesick underlings smiled at their boss'es approval. "But your work is not done. I want thousands of these cute but scary creatures by next week. Succeed and you all get kisses from me." Most of the men were enthusiastic, but their leader, Fenix, seem a bit pessimistic.
"Madam Ivy," said Fenix, "That'll cost a few mill."
Ivy laughed. "Then I roll that stupid Mayor!"
Yuji's perspective:
Harold Fumar was on the witness stand. Prosecutor Ben Jones asked, "Do you know who you saw talking to Person #1 (Batman's designation in this case because false identities are frowned on by the courts)?"
"Yeah," said Harold, pointing to Yuji's clients.
After a few more obligatory but uneventful questions, a cocky Jones turned to his opponents and said, "Your witness."
Yuji walked to Harold. "How dark was it?"
"Objection," said Jones. "We've already established that it was almost pitch-black."
"Withdrawn," said Yuji before Judge Thomas could hurt his credibility by sustaining the objection. "What were the limits of your vision?"
"You're just tryin' ta find holes to punch in me," scoffed Harold. "I know you try ta do this to witnesses all the..."
Thomas banged his gave. "Order! You will answer question properly and respectfully."
Harold made no move to apologize for his totally true but undisciplined remark. Smelling blood, Yuji said, "I asked a simple question. Do you think this is a football game where you are supposed to hit your opponent?"
"Objection," Jones lawfully interrupted.
"You'll say anything," shouted Harold before Thomas could make a decision. "You deserve that family of killas."
"Your honor," said Yuji. "With the exception of the traitorous Al, the Traylor family hasn't been found guilty of anything. Witnesses are not supposed to get into wild speculation." Not that Fumar was wrong about the Traylors, but nothing had been proven.
"Indeed," agreed an incensed Thomas. "In fact, you've said more than enough, Mr. Fumar. Bailiff, get this young man out of my courthouse!"
"I want to approach," said Jones. Thomas paused before signalling to Yuji and Jones to do so.
"Your honor," whispered Jones, "I admit Mr. Fumar lacks decorum, but he is one hundred percent right. Nothing he has said has been wrong."
"I don't tolerate disrespect," whispered Yuji.
"Nor do I," Thomas glared at Jones. "Mr. Jones, your witness has disrupted this courtroom. You are hereby held in contempt. If we get another witness like this, there will be consequences."
"He was badgered," pleaded Jones. "Mr. Takahan was out of order himself."
"To your benches," said Thomas. With everyone sitting down, his voice rose so the jury could hear, "I apologize for the disturbance this young man has caused. Mr. Jones, I hold you responsible. And in contempt. One more witness like this and I you will spend all time not in court but in lockup for the remainder of this trial. Is that understood?"
"Yes, your honor," Jones said weakly.
As Harold was escorted out, Yuji smiled at Anita and their clients. "It's looking good."
"That was out of line," said Anita.
"Way out of line," agreed Freeman.
"I approve," said Bullock.
"Of course you do, Harv," Montoya shook her head. "You get a lot of citizens' complaints."
Yuji groaned at the condemnations he was getting. Why weren't they just happy to be a long way towards freedom?
Batman's perspective:
It had been nineteen days since Poison Ivy's most recent escape from Arkham. Nothing had been heard from her since then. Batman's team was gathered in the Batcave.
"I don't suppose you and Catwoman found Ivy, did you?" asked Batman to Batgirl. She shook her head.
"I'm vaguely aware of her," said Catwoman.
"She's one of the most dangerous people I ever met," said Batgirl.
"You're lucky you haven't had to deal with her yet," agreed Robin.
"And she's had a long time to come up with one of her misguided schemes," said Batman.
"Misguided?" asked Catwoman.
"She thinks terrorism is the way to save the environment," explained Batgirl.
"Honestly, part of me agrees," said Catwoman.
"She's a fanatic," explained Batman. "I'm very frustrated that we haven't located her yet."
"How do you think I feel about this?" asked Batgirl. "She's sore at me for the two times I had to pull you out of traps she set. No offense."
"Look," said Robin. "We know it's hard to find someone who prefers to live out in the country where there's so much land mass. We've just gotta keep looking."
"I agree," said Batman with determination.
Poison Ivy's perspective:
Little did Batman know that he was not going to have to keep searching for Ivy any longer.
Fenix brought Ivy a meal of steak and eggs (she rejected fruit and vegetables out of pro-plant principle).
"You're not in charge of serving me dinner, Fenix," said a puzzled Ivy.
"Madam Ivy," said Fenix, "This is a special occasion. We're done."
"How many?"
"Forty-five thousand thirty-seven."
Ivy smiled wide and open. "You're kidding."
"Naw," said Fenix. "We counted 'em."
"We send forty thousand plant zombies out tomorrow," said Ivy. "But not before they're wired up so I can communicate with them. Meanwhile, some of you will be in Gotham watching the skirmishes with cameras. Since the zombies aren't very bright, I will guide them from here."
"You sure they'll take Gotham City?" asked Fenix.
"You're such a nervous nellie," said Ivy. "We've got an army of super strong, bulletproof monsters that's about to smash Gotham. Superman probably wouldn't make the difference, and he always seems to have super problems to deal with, anyway. Gotham is mine! And she's only the beginning! Go."
Fenix left and Ivy began eating. She was overjoyed.
Amazing. All this time I had been trying to force the world to stop killing our planet with seduction and poison when a handmade army would have done a better job. No matter. The good people - the true good people - are finally going to win. As for my old 'friends' with a lamer than Hell obsession with flying animals, you better run while you still have the chance!
Mayor Charles Falsootu's perspective:
Falsootu was in a state of shock and fear. Despite being unarmed, an army of plant-like people had annexed the northernmost district of Gotham. Greater strength and speed than human potential, not to mention bulletproof hides, was enabling them to defeat the police. Of course, more than a hundred had died in police casualties alone! It had all been on Falsootu's TV. Sure enough, he got the call.
"Mr. Mayor," said a calm but urgent-sounded Commissioner Studge.
"The press is covering this zombie apocalypse," said Falsootu. "And I do have a TV."
"Do you have any idea of who made these things?" asked Studge.
Falsootu knew all too well. "Poison Ivy."
"Good guess," said Studge, uncertain, "But how are you so damn sure?"
Falsootu realized that he had said too much. "I... well, how many other people are there with the know-how or inclination to build this army?"
"Yeah, I guess you're right," realized Studge.
Whew, that was close! "Get back to work, Commissioner," ordered Falsootu. "Update me every twenty-five minutes." He was too emotionally involved to help but touch the "clear" icon on his phone before Studge had replied. The reason was because he understood the obvious. These creatures were what Ivy had spent the $100 million Falsootu had paid her on.
This is all my fault! I wanted to destroy Batman so badly that I turned to a psychotic terrorist! I can tell myself that she seduced me, but I know she was able to do it in part because there was no price I would not pay to get the face behind Batman's cowl in Blackgate!
Falsootu had to set things right. He phoned Poison Ivy.
"To what do I owe the honor, your honor?" asked Ivy festively.
"What the Hell's going on?" demanded Falsootu. "You said you'd use the money to kill Batman and then walk out of my life."
"I am altering the deal," said Ivy playfully. "Pray I don't alter it further."
"You watch too many movies," sighed Falsootu, recognizing the quote.
"Seriously," said Ivy, "I thought about it. Decided it wasn't right. You see, you're a part of the earth-killing establishment. Batman's only a misguided idealist. But don't get me wrong. Knowing him, he won't know what's good for him and he'll get himself killed."
"Listen," said Falsootu. "Let's make a deal. Surely there's some alternative to Armageddon."
Ivy burst out laughing. "You are pathetic! I scammed you like you've been doing to your constituents your whole career, and your solution is to make another deal with me? OK. Gather a lifetime supply of food and drink and fly to the South Pole. Don't think I need to do anything about that part of the world. How's that for a deal?"
Ivy hung up. Falsootu tried to redial. "I'm sorry," said the operator's recorded voice. "This number you have dialed is not a working number."
Falsootu buried his face in his hands, waiting for the Mayor's mansion to be smashed.
Batman's perspective:
The Batplane was in its new Stealth Mode, which used specific and controlled lighting to blend the parent airplane in with its surroundings, as well as signal-scrambling to hide its radar image. Batman, Batgirl, Catwoman, and Robin were inside. Their flight over some small towns just outside Gotham was finished.
"Doesn't look like anyone saw us," said Robin.
"Now can we go?" asked Batgirl. "Those sons of bitches have gotta be tearing Gotham up by now!"
"We had to build this camouflaging equipment today," Batman reminded the younger Bat. "We need the element of surprise it gives us to stand a chance. We also needed to test it. And I've warned you about watching your mouth."
"Do we stand a chance?" asked a worried Catwoman. "One vehicle against an army?"
"Optimism," preached Batman. "The element of surprise gives us a fighting chance, but not without hope. Believe you will fail and you will fail."
"Amen," agreed Batgirl.
Batman noticed that the army of plant zombies had reached downtown Gotham. He and his allies had been out of action too long. The Batplane flew over and dropped its bombs onto a line of zombies. Then it began swooping down and ramming zombies between pauses to wait for the camouflage to re-hide the Batplane from the zombies.
Combined with the explosives that the police were using, this seemed to have turned the tide; the zombies retreated to the northern part of town.
That area was less wide-open, giving the zombies the advantage; Batman chose not to pursue just yet. "They're getting orders to retreat," he said.
"How can you tell?" asked Catwoman.
"Because I'm detecting communicating signals to the helmets strapped onto their heads," said Batman.
"Someone's giving them orders," realized Robin. "The Traylors?"
"I worked for them for some time," said Catwoman. "They may be rednecks, but they're not stupid. They know better than to trust a psycho-bitch with this much power over them."
"Falsootu," Batman realized. "Yes, he can appropriate money for Ivy and is Hell-bent on catching us. He might be insane enough to do that."
"If you're questioning him," said Batgirl, "I'm coming along."
"No," said Batman. "You're too emotionally involved in light of what he did to your father. Don't. I'm not changing my mind. Your only concern is to keep close watch on whether the plant zombies leave that district."
Batman landed the Batplane and took a Batcycle stationed inside to drive to the Mayor's Mansion. The others lifted off again.
Batman saw some doberman pinschers just beyond Falsootu's gate. He threw a Batarang to lure them out. As they gathered around the spot the Batarang had hit and began barking and sniffing, Batman took them out with a Batgas pellet. Good dogs.
Batman had long ago foreseen this night and memorized where the Mayor's office was. Instead of Batgrappling the roof of the mansion, Batman tied a Batarang around a Batrope to avoid being heard, and threw it up to the top. This enabled him to climb alongside the window. There he saw Falsootu, rifle in hand, scanning the ground for intruders, which the barking had clued him in on. Batman seized the gun and leapt into the office, tackling Falsootu.
"Don't. Make. Noise." Falsootu was too much of a primped blue blood to defy Batman's threat. Then again, maybe the only difference between him and Bruce Wayne was Bruce's quest; he could even be argued to be as paranoid and eccentric in his own way as Falsootu was in his. At least Bruce's demons were turned in the right direction.
"Poison Ivy didn't have enough money to make those alone," said Batman. "Did you help?"
"No," said Falsootu.
But Batman saw the lie in the Mayor's eyes and leaned in until Batman's own almost touched Falsootu's. "Did you?"
"O-OK, I did," squeaked Falsootu. "She said she'd take a menace to society out. I never meant for this to happen."
Batman knew who that "menace" was. "More than a thousand people are dead because of you. But now it's over. I recorded this conversation."
"Go ahead," grinned a somewhat more confident Falsootu. "Turning yourself in might buy yourself a lighter sentence."
"Have Ivy's pheromones gotten stronger?" asked Batman. Falsootu was clearly not understanding his situation.
"I'm right as rain," chuckled Falsootu. "You threatened me to get this confession. Inadmissible. But you have a price on your head."
He's right. Dammit, he's right!
Poison Ivy's perspective:
Should've known he'd have an ace up his sleeve.
Poison Ivy had been fighting Batman long enough to understand that he was full of surprises. Just when you thought he was dead, you were unconscious and being loaded back to Arkham. Ivy also knew that Batman just might be able to find her to force her to call off invasion of Gotham. Something had to be done.
She walked outside her cabin in the clearing of a forest and sought out Fenix. "Yes, Madam Ivy," smiled Ivy's love-struck second in command.
"I have reason to believe that my old enemy Batman is coming. Maybe as soon as tonight, so don't go to sleep."
"I'll give my life to save you," promised Fenix.
"Of course, you would," smiled Ivy with pride in how well her pheromonal magic had worked on her human cohorts, "but it need not be that extreme. There are hundreds of plant zombies between me and them. They'll be looking for an opening." She illustrated by holding her hands apart. "My plan is to give them that opening, then shut it on them!" She clapped. "Not unlike the way a flytrap catches its food.
"How?" asked Fenix.
"Simple," said Ivy. "Create a gap in their pacing every twelve minutes. Each of these gaps must last no more than three."
"Will they be added to our ranks?" asked Fenix.
"No," said Ivy. "I'll let you do what you want to anyone he brings along, but I want his head. It will demoralize the GCPD and enable us to quickly finish the conquest of Gotham. With its vast economic resources, the army will grow much larger. Unless they want to nuke millions of people, the U.S. government will have no choice but to surrender."
"Yes, ma'am," saluted Fenix.
Batman's perspective:
"There's so many," Catwoman looked in horror at the hundreds of plant zombie patrols just outside Poison Ivy's new stomping grounds. And Ivy had been smart enough to spread out the enclosures in which she and her seduced human henchmen now lived far enough apart that one could not Batgrapple across them. "How the Hell are we gonna get through? I was a world class cat-burglar, not an ant."
"We have to try, Catwoman," said Batman. "We only fended off the first attack because we caught Ivy's monsters by surprise. We'll never do that again."
"Besides," noted Batgirl, "The autopsies of the dead zombies indicate that most of them were activated a week ago. That means that Ivy can greatly increase their numbers in a day. If we're gonna take them out, it's got to be now!"
"I don't mean to sound negative," said Robin. "But Catwoman's right. They're everywhere."
"I know," said Batman.
"Then you know we'll get caught," said Catwoman.
"We've faced certain destruction before," Batman tried to keep spirits high. "You know this is the only way."
Before long, though, an opening between the zombie patrols opened up.
"Over there," Robin spotted it first. "We've got the break we're looking for."
"It's a trap," said Catwoman. "Ivy's probably got pot guys indoors watching that spot where we can't see them. Go there and we'll get pinched by those green and brown bastards!"
"It's also a chance," said Batman. "One that may be hard to get back. We run through the opening, full sprint! Anyone who makes it through doesn't stop until we reach that big building!" He pointed at it. "Ready... set... Go!"
And so they ran. As Batman expected, they were a third of the way through the unsecured spot when he heard a voice call, "There they are!"
Batman, Batgirl, Catwoman, and Robin formed a cross as the zombies came in at them. Each hero downed several before punches began landing on them. Eventually, they were all being held by several zombies.
"Don't kill 'em," said one man who must have just recently come outdoors. "Madam Ivy wants 'em. All of you holding one of them follow me." He lead the qualifying zombies towards the big building. At least it was where Batman and his allies wanted to be.
"Sorry to say, 'I told you so,'" said Catwoman sarcastically.
"Only the last moments of your life," mocked Batgirl playfully. "Why not spend them acting like a child?"
"That's my department anyway," chuckled Robin.
"Shut up, all o' you," demanded the man leading them on. "The boss lady didn't say you hafta be alive."
Eventually, the man and the zombies he lead had taken the masked vigilantes into what looked like a plant-themed throne room. Ivy was sitting on the throne with her right leg crossed over her left.
"Excellent work, Fenix," Ivy kissed her henchman on the cheek, making him smile. "As for you four, this may be pleasant, but it's no surprise. Well, other than The Catwoman being here. You're at the wrong place, at the wrong time. Sorry, Robin. Hate to do this to children, but you're on the wrong side. I especially love seeing you here, Batgirl. You've saved Batman from me more than once. You'll get it first. Speaking of Batman, you've been lucky for years, but it's all over. I was the smarter one all along. Care to beg for your lives?"
"No," said Batman. He had sneaked a smoke bomb into his right hand undetected by anyone. "But I would like a few last words."
"I'm listening," said Ivy.
"Never gloat over our 'defeat' until the belts are off." With that, Batman flung the smoke bomb at Ivy's left eye. The smoke burned it, causing her to fall onto the ground screaming in pain. As Batman hoped, the zombies all released their targets to help.
"No, you morons," shouted Fenix. "Back on them!" But it was too late. The four were already up. The plant zombies attacked again, but this time, it was a more manageable thirty-two against four.
"Gas," shouted Batman. He, Robin, and Batgirl threw gas pellets at the zombies, knocking them out. Fenix managed to move out of the way. Ivy did not have to because she was immune to poison.
"You won't get Madam Ivy without a..." he quieted upon realizing who he was talking to.
"I was going to say there were lots of women who deserve you more than Ivy," grinned Batgirl, "But I've changed my mind."
"Well, it looks like you've gotten me again," Ivy advanced towards Batman with open arms and projected pheromones. The lovely smell might have appealed to him if he had not recently found love.
"No," said Batman, pushing Ivy down.
"I'm the one who beat you to him, white bitch," smiled Catwoman.
"Call off your zombies," said Batgirl.
"I will do no such thing," said Ivy bravely. "Not when your victory is meaningless. See, my army's still in Gotham, set to crush the GCPD tomorrow. And even if there was anything you could do to stop them now that they know what to expect, You won't even get to try. My men will eventually realize that this has taken to long and send more zombies in to kill you. Only thing that can stop them is my voice. Like I said, Batman, I'm smarter than you."
Catwoman ran at the sitting Ivy and did a baseball slide into her knocking her out.
"That didn't help us," said Robin.
"So what?" asked Catwoman. "Nobody makes a play for my man." She and Batman hugged.
"I wouldn't do that till we're out of this," said Batgirl. "And I don't see a way."
"You disappoint me, Batgirl," Batman shook his head. "Of course there's a way: her voice."
"She's nuts," said Catwoman. "We'll never intimidate her."
"Maybe not," Batman turned to Fenix. "But you should know her biology better than us. Coach us on what we're about to do or we'll make sure your friends know of your cowardice on Ivy's part."
"Strong argument," Fenix nodded. Batman, Robin, Catwoman, Batgirl, and Fenix put the helmet Ivy had used to communicate with her faraway plant zombies on her head to now be used also to control her through her unique biology.
"Stand," tested this. Ivy stood up like a robot. Robin jumped back in surprise. Catwoman could not help but laugh at him.
"Ha, ha," said Robin sarcastically.
"Tell your zombies to go to sleep for a month," said Batman.
"Go to sleep for a month," obeyed Ivy.
Batgirl looked outside to see the zombies asleep and smiled. "It worked. That's a switch. It's Ivy who's under control."
"I'll call the police and tell them about this," promised Fenix.
Batman, Batgirl, Catwoman, and Robin nodded. They had saved Gotham City once again!
Lieutenant Freeman's perspective:
The verdict was being read by Judge Thomas. "On the charges of conspiracy and aiding and abetting known fugitives, how do you find?"
"Not guilty on both counts," said the foreman.
"Then, as the defendants, Mr. Freeman, Mr. Bullock, and Ms. Montoya have been acquitted of all charges, they will taken back to the correctional facility and released. Court is adjourned." Thomas banged his gavel. Everyone in the courtroom filed out, but not before Yuji Takahan smirked at a disgusted Ben Jones.
As the three former cops left, Yuji said, "Is everyone unwilling to admit that my 'dirty tricks' were why we won?"
"I am," said Bullock.
"Of course, you are," Freeman shook his head. "You and him think alike."
"He's got you there, Harv," said Montoya.
"As much as I like winning," said an unhappy Anita Boggs, "I'm never working with Yuji again. You've been great clients."
Unfortunately, Freeman, Bullock, and Montoya were only going to be clients for some time, not police officers. As long as Studge was Commissioner, they would not be getting their jobs back.
Bruce Wayne's perspective:
Bruce Wayne, Selina Kyle, Barbara Gordon, and Tim Drake were watching TV in Wayne Manor's media room. They were waiting for Mayor Falsootu's speech about the end of Poison Ivy's attempted coup.
"So our friends on the police force made it?" said Selina.
"Yeah, but was it because they were right to help us or because of that witness who was explosive in all the wrong ways?" Barbara asked.
"Important thing is they're free," said Tim.
"There's Falsootu," said Bruce as he saw the Mayor step onto the podium.
"Guess he's got no choice but to acknowledge us as heroes," predicted Selina with satisfaction.
"Gotham has weathered a crisis," said Falsootu. "We have someone to thank. I present to you our savior, Fenix Smalls."
The true heroes of Gotham sat in shock as Fenix walked onto the podium and lied. In his telling, he had turned on Ivy because guilt over the impending conquest of Gotham gave Fenix the willpower to escape Ivy's charms and come up with the brilliant plan that saved Gotham. In reality, that was Batman's idea. All Fenix did was what he had to in order to survive after he had lacked the courage to risk his life.
"We owe Mr. Smalls a debt we can never repay," said Falsootu. "I am therefore ordering a monument in his honor."
Bruce turned off the TV.
"That piece of crap," snapped an angry Barbara. "He couldn't admit that we saved the city, so he's given the credit to a weak-willed coward."
"And it's his fault all this happened in the first place," Tim reminded everyone.
"I know," said Bruce. "But he won't get away with this. Someday, somehow, he'll get what's coming to him!"
