A/N: Once again thank you all for all your support!
A/N: Chapter Warning – Bad Language, mentions of rape and attempted suicide and violence
Chapter 19: Letters to Remus, Letters from Remus and the Hospital Wing
Harry Potter was trembling; he had faced many dangers and had lived a life full of adrenalin and fought mainly on nerves. This was something different.
Harry Potter knew that there was nothing more terrifying than a protective Severus Snape. Severus Snape didn't make empty threats, he didn't raise his voice, and he wouldn't ever harm without reason. However, what Severus Snape did do, was make promises, and Harry knew that when the potions master had told them to leave Hermione alone, the consequences of disobeying would make Voldemort himself more preferable.
Harry shuddered. He was exhausted, he had trusted Dumbledore, and he had trusted Sirius. But they had gone and hurt his sister and now she was lying, barely alive, in a morbid hospital wing. Harry almost went in, he wanted to apologise to his friend. Hell, Harry knew he would spend the rest of his life grovelling and begging on his knees for her forgiveness and even then, he didn't expect her to ever forgive or trust him again.
"Harry" Dumbledore said hesitantly.
Harry spun and looked at him, silently asking him why he had protected Sirius when he had clearly done wrong, twice.
Harry shook his head, telling Dumbledore to back off, Harry took one more longing look at the hospital door and headed back towards the Gryffindor common room.
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Once inside the common room Harry sat by the fireplace, he needed to speak with Remus first before he spoke to Sirius. He wanted his conversation with Sirius to take place face to face, not over some fire call, or where he couldn't cause immediate damage to his 'godfather'.
So, he began writing a letter to Remus in hopes that he could help him. Harry sat for a while contemplating what to write, once he had a gist of where his thoughts were going, Harry put his quill down and decided to read over it once more and send it in the morning.
Yawning, Harry headed up to bed and instantly fell into a troubled and restless sleep.
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Meanwhile in the hospital wing, Severus Snape was looking down at a very pale and barely breathing Hermione. He was trying to keep the tears of anger from his eyes, his fists were clenched tightly and he wanted to yell at the world. Stood next to him, was a traumatised Mediwitch who was trying to keep professional and not fall apart at the sight of the young girl's mangled body.
"What monster could do something like this?" She had whispered.
Severus remained stoic and didn't seem to take his eyes off the unconscious witch. The Mediwitch noticed but said nothing; she had not seen that soft expression on the young man's face in decades. The Mediwitch could feel Hermione's magic, trying to reach out to Severus' aura, to keep her tied to this world. Poppy did not interfere with this type of healing, the magic would heal the girl itself, and she just supervised and enjoyed the silence. Well, at least until the doors to the infirmary slammed open.
Severus closed his eyes and sighed, he had warned Dumbledore not to come anywhere near the girl for now.
"I thought I told you to fuck off you old coot" Severus snapped, not looking away from his Hermione.
"Excuse me young man, but you are not too old for a slap across the arse for your cheek" warned a very feminine, and a very Scottish voice.
Severus paled and immediately spun around to face the older witch with an apologetic look on his face.
"I apologise Minerva, I thought you were Dumbledore, I was about to start throwing hexes" Severus told her, trying not to show his secret fear of the older witch.
Minerva, who was looking worried, looked past him and directly at her student.
"What's wrong with her? Will she be alright?" Minerva asked Poppy.
Poppy sighed.
"It's difficult to tell. It's like she's given up both bodily and mentally. However, her magic is tying her to the world of the living, almost like it wants her not to give up, like there are reasons for her not to give up, and her magic is trying to latch onto that source. She's stable for now at least, her magic seems to have found something and it's just enough, for now" Poppy informed the teachers.
"Now about her other injuries...is there anything either of you want to inform me of?" Poppy said glaring at the professors, daring them to brush off the girls injuries.
The professors looked nervously at each other, trying to think about how to proceed. That was all Poppy needed, in that moment she knew that the professors were aware of the girls condition and how she came to be that way.
"Merlin, what happened? Why was she not brought immediately to me?" Poppy practically shrieked.
"She came to me for medical assistance instead" Severus offered the information.
"Pardon?" Minerva said, in every explanation that had been given of this whole situation, never had there once been mention that Severus provided medical assistance.
Severus sighed praying that Hermione would forgive him for divulging such information.
"She came to me, knowing that I was trained in Healing and asked me to heal her in order to keep the whole situation under wraps" he informed the two witches.
"Yes, I can see that she has been healed before, I thought she had gone to St. Mungo's for help, I didn't expect it to have been you who had helped. You did a good job, she probably would have bled out from the lacerations that she had, judging by the scar tissue." Poppy told them both.
Severus just nodded his worried eyes were still on Hermione.
Both witches noticed this and glanced at each other with a knowing smile. Although it would be viewed disapprovingly, there was an obvious connection between student and teacher and was only proved further by the fact that their magic was reaching out for each other. Almost like soul mates, if you believe in such a phenomenon.
"There is nothing more we can do until she wakes, it will not be for a few days though" Poppy told them.
She then turned to Minerva and made up an excuse so that both the witches could leave. They turned back in time to see Severus sit down in the chair next to Hermione's bed as he grasped her hand lightly.
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A few days later saw a wide eyed, frozen Remus Lupin, sat at the kitchen table at number 12 Grimmauld Place. He was holding a piece of parchment in his shaking hands, rereading the words in disbelief. He couldn't believe it, his eyes welled with tears and he was glad that Tonks had decided to leave the household and had decided to visit her mother. Remus grew angrier the more he read the letter.
Dear Moony,
Things have been changing here, all things pink has practically taken over and you hardly ever see Dumbledore anymore, he keeps disappearing and we don't really know where.
I guess nobody can ever truly understand the mind of Dumbledore and how his logic works. That's what I'm really writing to you about, Dumbledore has done something...bad, I don't know what to do or how to put things right. But I need you to understand that what I am about to tell you may seem implausible, and wrong, and you may not want to believe it, but it is true.
I had a conversation with Hermione some time ago, and she confessed to me that Padfoot had caused her great harm whilst she was staying there during the summer, and that Dumbledore kept it all hushed up in favour of him.
I didn't fully believe her, I yelled at her, I called her a liar, and I sort of shut her out and gave the benefit of the doubt to Padfoot. I went to Dumbledore, and told him about what Hermione had told me, he was angry and so he called a meeting with Hermione and me. Dumbledore accused her of causing trouble and she lost the plot, she went absolutely mental at him, no mercy. However, later on that evening, Hermione was found unconscious in the forbidden forest and upon a further examination by Madame Pompfrey, Hermione was found to have injuries caused by sexual assault and the mental and physical damage is what had caused her to collapse.
I couldn't believe what I was being told, Moony. But the guilt on Dumbledore's face and the look of sheer murder on Snape's confirmed everything.
Hermione told me that you knew about this. That she had told you about this and you went to Dumbledore and she was punished for telling you.
What happened Moony?
I need to speak to Padfoot, I understand that I won't be able to see him until the Christmas holidays and I refuse to confront him any other way than face to face.
I feel so awful Moony. The whole time we were there during the summer, every remark, every comment and every low blow that we took at her and the whole time she was dealing with something so unthinkable. I'm surprised she didn't try to off herself earlier than she did.
I didn't mention that, did I?
The bullying she's been facing since we returned, because of us, because of me, and the lack of support and places to turn to nearly caused her to jump off the astronomy tower. Had it not been for Neville, she would have succeeded.
She's turned to Snape and Malfoy for companionship and help...Malfoy! I really don't have a clue what to do or say. She's still unconscious and we have no idea when she will wake and in what state she will be in.
I just don't know Moony. What shall I do?
Harry x
Remus stared at the words and he felt shame, an overwhelming amount of guilt that made his stomach hurt, and pain, that he had singlehandedly prolonged the suffering of another.
Remus thought back to the conversation he'd had with Hermione at Kings Cross and how he had flooed Dumbledore and watched with satisfaction as she was punished and demoted. He'd put his faith in the wrong person, just as he had done many years before.
Hermione had sought help from her friends and family, those from Gryffindor but it had been the enemy house, Severus and Draco Malfoy who had saved her.
Remus thought back to the subtle hints that Severus had made towards the situation and wondered if Severus had truly known back then.
Remus remembered how he could smell the change in Hermione. How he could smell the change in her hormones which could only be caused by the loss of virginity and how he had been foolish enough to accuse Severus of the atrocity.
Remus groaned and put his head in his hands, he had a headache, and he also needed to think of a response for Harry but first, there was something of more importance.
"Moony? Where are you dear friend?" Sirius Black shouted from somewhere in the house, most probably the study.
Remus grimaced and he had to force himself to remain calm. He wouldn't do anything until he could be sure he could cause the most damage and not get in trouble for it.
"Yes, I'm here Padfoot, I will join you in a moment, I'm just in the middle of doing something and want to finish doing it before I stop" Remus yelled back, surprised at how normal he sounded.
Sirius' laughter could be heard.
"If you are having a wank in there be sure to cleanse the area before you leave" Sirius jested.
Remus grimaced again at the vulgarity of his words and he suddenly saw Sirius in a new light.
Sirius had always been a womaniser and loved his alcohol but Azkaban had sent him off the deep end, and he had become almost brutal in his respect towards women and his attitudes towards sex.
Remus teared up again as he realised Hermione would have experienced this, twice, and being virginal would have made it even more horrific for her. Her introduction to sex would have been awful; she would never want to feel the touch of another man again.
Remus pulled himself together; he felt he had given himself his own personal mission.
There was an Order meeting in a couple of days and before then, there was a letter that he needed to write and send.
He reached for a piece of blank parchment and bean writing.
'Dear Hermione' he wrote.
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Meanwhile...
"Severus? Severus?"
Severus Snape's eyes opened, it took him a moment to realise where he was but soon recognised the plain white of the infirmary. Had he really fallen asleep here?
As his brain woke up, he searched for the person who had been trying to talk to him. He didn't see anyone so shook his head, thinking that he had begun to crazy and had started hearing things.
He turned his attention back to the young woman, whose bed he had been beside every free moment he got.
He instantly found the two beautiful brown eyes that were Hermione Granger's staring back at him and she was smiling.
Severus' heart leapt. She was awake! She was alright!
"Welcome back" he smirked at her.
"What happened?" She said her voice raspy from days of disuse.
Severus immediately fetched a cool glass of water, which she gulped down in seconds, he gave her another and another, until she had sated her thirst.
"You were found unconscious; the stress caused your body to shut down. It needed to reboot on its own" he told her.
"How long have I been out" she asked.
"About three days" he answered her.
"And you're here because...?" She asked.
"I had to drop off some potions to Madame Pompfrey, and thought I'd ensure you did not need any more potions before I left" he answered her, giving a half truth.
"Thestral shit" snorted another voice.
Hermione's eyes widened as she saw the wonderful, kind Mediwitch approach the bed and curse.
Poppy chuckled at the girl's reaction; Poppy was human too after all.
"Professor Snape has been here every free moment that he has had Miss Granger. He's even slept in that chair for the past two nights" Poppy smirked at Severus as he flushed completely red.
"You've been here the whole time?" She asked in amazement.
Severus turned crimson and found the edge of the bedsheets extremely interesting.
"Leave the man alone Poppy" Minerva giggled as she entered the infirmary.
"How are you Miss Granger?" Minerva asked, as Poppy conducted the necessary tests to ensure the girl was in a healthy state.
"I feel good thank you Professor" she said to Minerva.
Minerva smiled, she was genuinely happy for the girl. Minerva suddenly remembered the reason for her visit in the first place and approached the bed that was occupied by her student.
"This came for you Miss Granger" she said as she handed Hermione a letter. Hermione accepted the letter and began to open it.
"One came for you also Severus" Minerva handed him his letter.
That made Hermione pause, she waited until Severus had opened his and he looked at her.
"They're from Lupin" he said, watching her reaction carefully.
Hermione took a deep breath and began to read her letter.
Dear Hermione,
It is with great sorrow and deep regret in which I write this letter.
Harry informed me about what has happened and I wanted to apologise Hermione. I don't expect you to forgive me and I am more than prepared to spend the rest of my life begging for your forgiveness. I should have never have turned away from you. I should have helped you regardless of how much I didn't believe you at the time.
Harry tells me you're not well. Is there anything I can do for you?
If there is, please don't hesitate to ask. I will do anything for you.
Your apologetic servant, (and hopefully friend again one day).
Remus X
She smiled as she read the letter; she knew she would forgive Remus. She had already said that she hadn't expected him to believe her over his oldest friend in the first place. She had wanted help. Although, he hadn't given it to her when she needed it most, he was willing to give it to her now and she was not going to lose him again. Remus was a good friend and her closest adult friend (besides Severus and Minerva). She would be sure to write him back.
She then looked at Severus; Remus wouldn't have sent him an apology so, what had he written to Severus about?
She was curious but she would never infringe on Severus' or Remus' privacy like that.
Severus stared at her, and gave her a nod to gesture that everything was alright and there was nothing she should be worrying about.
"Miss Granger, you are healthy and I can discharge you. You may want to take it easy for the next couple of days but you should be back in classes soon, you have much to catch up on I expect" Poppy told her.
Hermione nodded and thanked her and she was left alone with Severus.
"Can I have a moment?" She asked him.
He looked at her with a blank expression, unsure of why she was dismissing him just like that.
Hermione smirked and gave him a sly look as she began to take off her hospital gown so that she could get dressed.
Severus' eyes widened, and he practically sprinted away from her vicinity in order to give her privacy.
As he waited for her, he could hear her laughter and couldn't help but smile at the musical sound.
"Smitten" Poppy commented, causing Severus to snap his head towards her.
He composed himself and adopted his stoic expression and tried not to sneer at both Poppy and Minerva who were giggling at his expense.
"Women" he grumbled.
Hermione exited from behind the curtain, fully dressed and more than happy to leave. She stopped when she realised she had stumbled into half a conversation and could feel the awkwardness rolling off Severus.
"I'm sure Professor Snape will escort you back" Minerva said, chuckling along with Poppy.
Severus sneered at them both before walking off, expecting Hermione to follow him.
As they left the hospital wing and descended the stairs Severus stopped and stared at Hermione.
"Would you care for some morning tea Miss Granger?" He asked.
"Professor Snape, I would be delighted" she replied and the pair headed towards the dungeons.
