A/N: Once again thank you all for reading this story! I had a couple of questions from the reviews last week. One was about how often I update. I update every six days as I like to give everyone a chance to feedback on the chapters, some comments sometimes give me ideas of where to go next with the story, so I like to allow a bit of time to allow any changes to the next chapter. So the dates that I will be posting over Christmas are December - 13th, 19th, 25th and 31st, so you will get a new chapter both on Christmas Day and New Years Eve. I already have about 36 chapters written and I will continue to post one every six days! Many thanks!

A/N: Chapter Warning – Sexual situation, bad language and violence

Chapter 26: Apologies, Hagrid and Trouble

Neville was sat eating breakfast; members of the Gryffindor house had been keeping an eye on him and had been making sure that he was alright.

Suddenly, a Raven came and perched in front of him and passed him a note. Taking it, the bird flew off and Neville looked down at the familiar writing that was professor Snape's.
Neville gulped, hands shaking as he opened the letter and began to read it.

Mr Longbottom,

I want to see you in my office this afternoon at precisely 3pm.

DO NOT be late!

Professor S. Snape

Neville had gone pale again, why did Snape want to see him? Did he want to scare him more? Give him detention?

Neville was unsure and spent the rest of the day contemplating not turning up at all but quickly realised that if he didn't, he would most likely make the situation worse.

After deciding that he would go to see the professor, Neville sat and attempted to keep himself calm as a way of preparing himself for the meeting. He sat thinking about the events of the last few days, well what he could remember of them at least.

Neville had spent the last couple of days looking over his shoulder, Snape had always terrified him, and Snape was his boggart for goodness sake of course the man scared the shit out of him.

Neville had been shouted at many times by the professor over an exploded cauldron, or a failed attempt at a potion, but never had professor Snape gone that far before.

Neville closed his eyes and shivered at the memory. He had sprinted from the classroom as fast as he could and had just about made it to the boy's bathroom before he threw up. Neville had been scared so bad that it caused him to lose the contents of his stomach; he had been so scared that he had begun to hyperventilate in the boy's bathroom. He was trying to catch his breath but couldn't, he was having a panic attack and couldn't stop it.

Neville couldn't have been sure how long he had sat there like that, trying to gain control again before Dean Thomas had found him, pale, shaking, crying, and barely conscious. Neville wasn't sure what had really happened after that but he knew he spent the next few days in the hospital wing, screaming out at random moments for reasons unknown.

Neville was thankful for the help of Madame Pompfrey and Professor McGonagall for their help. Between the two of them they managed to snap him back to reality, and he was able to function normally again.

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When the time came, Neville stood up and calmly walked towards the dungeons. He knew that if he kept calm, he would probably be alright.

Once at the professor's door, he knocked lightly and waited for permission to enter. The door opened and out came Hermione, which had been unexpected.

She looked just as surprised to see him as he did her. Neville felt guilty, he hadn't really seen much of Hermione recently and they hadn't really spoken much either. Neville always tried to make time for Hermione because she was the only one that spoke to him in first year; he was the only one that spoke to her in first year. Two lonely outcasts found comfort and friendship in each other. They'd been close friends ever since.

After Hermione was firmly told to leave by Severus, Neville was invited in to the office and was told to take a seat.

Neville sat down hesitantly, he was nervous. He just knew that he was going to be given detention and he braced himself for it.

"Mr Longbottom, I have summoned you here today because I owe you an apology for my behaviour towards you in class the other day" Severus said genuinely.

Neville, who was shaking, looked up at the potions professor in shock. He hadn't expected an apology, he didn't really know why he was receiving one; he had been reckless with his potion in the first place. Neville gathered the courage to respond to his professor.

"It's alright professor, I was foolish and careless with my potion, and you are well within your right to shout at me, there are other people's lives involved. I deserved it" Neville said quietly.

"Mr Longbottom, you are terrible at potions, and you make mistakes, and I tell you off. That is how the process has worked for the last five years. However, I was informed, by your head of house, about the condition in which my recent behaviour left you, and I wanted to apologise for it. I was having a bad day and I took that out on you, I shouldn't have, it was unprofessional of me to do so" Severus told the boy.

"Thank you sir. There is no need though. I think I'm just terrified of screwing up a potion that in the end, I mess it up anyway. It should be me apologising sir, if I can make it up to you I will" Neville said, looking down at the desk, refusing to make eye contact.

"As a matter of fact, there is something you can do" Severus told him. Neville waited patiently, and slightly panicked, for further information.

After telling the boy about what Severus had thought of, Neville sat for a few moments, deep in thought before agreeing to Severus' requests.

Whilst the boy was in deep thought, Severus thought back to the events that had occurred on All Hallows' Eve and the days that had followed.

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Severus Snape had opened his eyes in the early hours of the first day of November and groaned. He could feel the hangover already; he sat up in bed and tried to piece together the events of the day before. He knew he could be volatile on Halloween; he always started drinking as soon as he woke up, as he had done on Halloween for the past fourteen years, and the rest was a little hazy.

The room had spun and Severus lay still for a moment, begging his body to keep the contents of his stomach as he tried to focus on the events of the day.

He remembered going through his classes and managed to make it to the last class of the day, his fifth years. He remembered sitting at his desk and completely zoning out. Then there was an explosion.

Longbottom!

Longbottom had messed up a potion, and it had exploded. Severus rubbed his head and sighed.

'What happened after that?' Severus thought to himself.

Severus then got up and went into the bathroom to have a shower, he needed to wash the smell of alcohol and sweat away as they were making him feel even worse.

As he stood under the warm running water he let himself fully relaxed and allowed his mind to wander and eventually, he finally pieced together the rest of the day.

He remembered yelling at the boy for messing up and had scared his class away. Except for Draco and the 'golden trio', then words had been exchanged and the two Gryffindor boys had left the room and Draco and Hermione had brought him to his room and had put him to bed.

Severus snapped out of his memory and finished his shower and got out, he dressed himself and towel dried his hair.

He hadn't done anything to embarrass himself then, good. The only embarrassment was having his godson and his Hermione put him to bed. Like a child.

Severus had then frozen, he remembered that in his drunken stupor he had divulged his early life to Draco and Hermione, he had told them everything. Severus had let out a gasp and had started pacing.

He had told them valuable information; he had put the both of them in serious danger. He knew that he would have to teach them occlumency in order to keep his favourite people safe.

Severus had then sat and thought about what he had told the two teens. He realised that he hadn't actually thought about Lily for a while and couldn't help but feel slightly guilty at that. He didn't really know why though.

Yes, he had said something awful in a moment of anger and embarrassment, but he hadn't meant to and he spent the rest of their school career apologising and trying to make it up to her. After he had insulted Lily, the bullying from her four friends got worse. No, the bullying from three out of four of her friends got worse. Severus, although he would never admit it, had a soft spot for Lupin.

It was obvious that Lupin was the 'outcast' of the group as the expression goes. Lupin, in a way was just like Severus. Lupin had been kept away from most people for his childhood in fear that he would lose control and hurt someone, therefore his parents kept him hidden away from the rest of the world so Lupin never had any friends when he was young.

Lupin had come to Hogwarts when the time was right and had taken friends wherever he could get them because he was exhausted of being lonely. Severus could relate to that on some level but in the end, Lupin was a werewolf and knew that many people would not accept him if his secret was discovered.

Severus sighed, he hadn't thought of Lily for months and he had a feeling it had something to do with the beautiful witch that he had the pleasure of befriending this summer, under the most brutal of circumstances, but a friend nonetheless.

Maybe it was time for him to let Lily go? Maybe it was time to move on; he couldn't be in love with a deceased woman for the rest of his life, could he, especially a woman who hated him in the end.

The following morning, Severus had found Draco and had told him to go to the potions office. He had then gone to the great hall to deliver Hermione the same message and he'd held a meeting with them and told them about having lessons and he'd dismissed them.

The rest of the week had been fine until Friday evening when a knock on his door proved to be a headache.

He had opened his office door and was immediately shoved back as an angry Scottish witch had forced her way into his office.

"Severus Snape! What the devil do you think you are playing at?" She yelled at the potions professor.

Severus had known this was coming, his Hermione had warned him about it. She had said that Minerva was after his blood and he was terrified.

"Do you know the last couple of days that I have had? I have had an unresponsive Neville Longbottom in the bloody hospital wing! Poppy had to send for mental healers from St Mungo's in order to assess the boy's mental health!" Minerva exclaimed, hoping to convey the seriousness of what had happened.

"I have had reports from your whole fifth year class about what happened. What was wrong with you Severus? Miss Granger explained that you were not well but that is not an excuse, you are a grown man and will do better to control your temper" she snapped at him.

Severus couldn't believe that he had upset the Longbottom boy that much. Had he really?

"Minerva, is the boy alright?" Severus asked, genuinely scared that he had caused the boy some severe damage.

"He's had to have several high dosages of calming draughts and he's had to have the strongest dosage of dreamless sleep. The boy has thrown up several times, out of sheer fright, and he's very nervous, he jumps whenever anyone talks with a loud voice. It's very serious Severus" Minerva informed him.

Severus looked down, he was strict, he was detached, but he had never considered himself to be an unnecessarily cruel person. To make someone so scared of you that you cause them to have no control over their body functions was an awful thing.

The Dark Lord would cause that to happen to his prisoners or people who had displeased him. Sirius Black had caused that to happen to his Hermione. Now, he had caused that to happen to his student. Did this mean that he was just like them?

He had shuddered at the thought.

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Snapping back to the present, he realised that the Longbottom boy was staring at him. Severus had clearly spaced out again and so dismissed the boy.

Severus then thought back to his two new occlumency students. Both Draco and Hermione had done well for their first attempts. However, Hermione was clearly more determined as she pushed through the pain and carried on, but Draco had moaned about it until Severus had grown irritated and had dismissed him. However, Severus believed that Draco's desire to leave was caused out of embarrassment, rather than pain.

Severus had gone inside Draco's mind and had seen the night where Lucius had been ordered to torture Draco, and Severus had seen it from the boy's point of view.

Draco believed that his father had completely turned on him, that his father hated him, that his father wanted absolutely nothing to do with him. He watched the memories of the days that followed and how Draco had cried at the loss of a father, and the sorrow that a stranger had taken his father's place.

What Draco didn't know was that Lucius was just like Severus, and worked as a spy for Severus but, for obvious reasons, was not a member of the Order. At the end of the day, Lucius just wanted the war won and his family safe but had to be careful because, unlike Severus, Lucius had a lot to lose.

Then Draco's memories had shifted to the summer where he had met another teenage boy at the resort he was staying at, and the memories showed Draco exploring his newfound sexuality.

Severus had wanted to withdraw and turn away but at the same time he knew that for the best results in occlumency, he had to try and draw out private and potentially embarrassing topics and memories in order for the student to be determined to stop him from seeing it. Hermione had just about succeeded in this area, however Draco had not.

Severus forced himself to watch the memory as his godson started kissing the other boy, the two teen boys then started stripping each other of clothing.

Severus had felt a slight resistance at that point, as Draco had tried to push him out of the memory but he wasn't strong enough.

Severus then grimaced as he watched the unknown boy kneel down in front of his nude godson, and begin to suck him off. Severus realised that the memory was of Draco's first blowjob and eventually stopped the memory and pulled of his godsons mind.

Both men had felt awkward, Draco was bright red and had practically fled the room when Severus dismissed him. Severus noticed that he was a little flushed himself from the memory, he was fine with Draco being gay and accepted it but that did not mean that he relished in watching his godson be intimate with a lover. He always cringed when he came across hormonal students who were out after curfew and undressing each other against the walls of their school. Severus shivered; it was also just like when he had walked in on Narcissa and Lucius going at it on the table in Lucius' study.

Severus sat in his empty office with a small glass of whiskey and tried to drink away the memories.

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Meanwhile, Hermione had been making her way up to Gryffindor tower when she found Harry and Ron.

"Hermione! Where have you been? We've looked everywhere for you!" Ron exclaimed excitedly.

"Why? What's going on?" Hermione replied, panicking slightly at the boys' sudden excitement.

"Hagrid is back! We're going to see him. Come on!" Harry said nearly running towards the courtyard.

Hermione and Ron hurried after him and as soon as the three made it outside and into the grounds, they broke into a sprint as they rushed down the hill towards Hagrid's hut.

As they approached the door of the hut, they all froze as they heard the familiar, shrill voice of all things pink.

"And just where do you think you have been Mr Hagrid?" Umbridge asked.

"I wasn't well, I've been away for health reasons" Hagrid replied.

The three eavesdropping teens looked at each other. There was no way that Hagrid had been away for his health. Had he? The three remained suspicious.

"Well, welcome back. I wouldn't bother unpacking though" Umbridge smiled tightly and let herself out.

The three teens waited until Umbridge was in the distance before coming out from their hiding spots behind the pumpkins. They knocked on the door.

Hagrid opened the door cautiously and immediately relaxed upon seeing his three friends.

He quickly let them in, and invited them to sit down.

"How have you been Hagrid?" Hermione asked.

"I've been alright" he replied.

The three looked at the man who was currently sporting a massive black eye, and they all just stared at him with their eyebrows raised in question.

Hagrid took in their expressions and knew that they would get the information he was hiding. He could stand up to his enemies but never his closest friends.

"Alright, alright!" He exclaimed when the three refused to stop their intense staring.

"Dumbledore sent me to try and gather followers, beasts and other creatures. I've been away trying to get support of the Giants but I wasn't the only one" Hagrid revealed.

"Voldemort?" Harry asked.

Hagrid nodded and exhaled.

"I think I got through to them but you never quite know with the beasts" Hagrid said.

The three understood that he was done talking about Order business and so they sat there and talked about what he had missed whilst they drank their tea and nibbled on biscuits.

It soon began to get dark, and Hagrid suggested that the three should be on their way back to the castle before they got caught out after hours.

The three agreed and bid Hagrid goodbye and began to sneak back into the castle. They made it through the doors and began to walk the empty corridors back towards their common room.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here? Three naughty Gryffindor's outside after dark. We can't have that"

The three froze and turned around to come face to face with the pink toad, who was looking at them with a vicious smile.

Shit! They were well and truly fucked.