Backs Against the Wall
Chapter Three
Lyra stared at the blackboard by the training room and then stared at Dorcas. She stared at the board some more, and then back at Dorcas. "There's no way I'm going to pass or, more importantly, survive. No way at all."
The practise fights had all been written up the previous evening and on their way into the room that morning they'd stopped to see. Despite his almost friendly behaviour towards her more recently, Lyra strongly suspected that McKinnon had done this on purpose. He was clearly sadistic.
"You don't know that, you're pretty good now!"
"I'm fighting Edgar. He won't care about the rules, he's going to try and hurt me!" Lyra said, a hint of distress creeping into her usually calm appearance.
"Yeah and do you really think Mason will let him?" Dorcas retaliated, tugging her friend away from the board and into the room. "He'll know what he's doing."
"If you mean me, I always know what I'm doing," Mason said as they entered, leaning against one of the pillars, arms folded across his chest.
Lyra scowled at him and marched over, her arms folded too, mimicking his stance. "He's going to kill me!"
"No he won't, not unless you let him," Mason said, clearly unconcerned.
Her scowl deepened and Mason was forcibly reminded of Sirius, which made him laugh.
"It's hardly a case of 'letting him'. But fine, I'll kick his ass and afterwards I'll kick yours," she snapped, turning and storming off to get changed and warmed up.
"Now that I'd love to see," Mason smirked across at Dorcas who was trying to contain her laughter.
"I bet you're all riled up now," she grinned, waggling her eyebrows.
"Why do you insist on doing this?"
"Because I think you'd make a great couple!" she pouted.
Mason rolled his eyes. "This is getting old, Doe. I'm her instructor, it wouldn't be appropriate, and on top of that – I do not like her like that."
"Psssh, sure," she laughed before skipping off after Lyra, "Dorcas is always right!"
"Okay everyone, keep it focussed and quiet please, fourth fight of today – remembering that these don't count for anything and they're just for practise – is Lyra and Edgar. Are you both ready?"
Lyra glanced across at Dorcas, who put both thumbs up and grinned, and then nodded to Mason, making her way into the marked area in the middle. She'd been paying close attention to the other fights and while she was still furious that she'd been partnered with someone who obviously was going to take this personally, she hoped that Edgar would realise his grudge against her wasn't worth getting into trouble for.
Taking a deep breath, she rolled her shoulders and eyed Edgar up, trying to calm her jitters: he was bigger and stronger than her but he relied on that and was much slower for it; she was sure he'd make this as embarrassing as possible, but the most important thing, she told herself sternly as she blocked out the jittery thoughts invading her head, was that he wasn't Robert. And that this time, she knew how to fight back.
"Ready," Edgar smiled, and Lyra nodded again.
"Me too."
"In which case… go."
It felt far too contrived – it was all a setup and she knew it, which only stilted her movements. Lyra didn't want to move first while there was no chance at a surprise attack or getting the upper hand quickly, but she also knew she couldn't wait for Edgar to move and hand him the advantage either. Hating that she knew this about herself, she cursed that she fought best in self-defence.
"Come on, sweetheart, you're hardly going to hurt me, what's all the waiting for?" Edgar smirked, causing a ripple of laughter from the other gathered recruits.
"Likewise," she said coolly, darting forwards and ducking under his swinging fist to kick at his knees like she'd done the other day.
Someone whooped from the back as she made contact and he stumbled, but he regained his balance too quickly and threw her down onto the mat, her breath leaving her lungs so fast that it hurt. Lyra tried to roll over and push herself up but felt Edgar's boots connect violently with her ribs and she cried out, jerking backwards.
"Get up, little Death Eater, and fight me properly," Edgar snapped, backing off as she hauled herself up and dropped back into the correct stance, wincing at the pain in her side.
"I'm not a Death Eater," she snarled, gritting her teeth and ducking again, landing a hard punch to his gut and then driving her knee up into his groin.
Mason choked back a laugh from the side, but it was suffocated by a gasp as Edgar grabbed the end of her ponytail and dragged her back into the middle of the circle, her feet kicking ineffectively as she tried to pull away.
"Not yet you aren't, but we know how your family turn out," he hissed into her ear. "Rotten to the core."
"Bones, watch it," Mason warned sharply, seeing tears in Lyra's eyes as her neck strained, her head bent back at a painful angle.
Edgar glanced over at him with contempt but let her go and she got carefully to her feet again.
Determined not to let this end without giving it her all, she noticed that Edgar was still recovering from the kick she'd inflicted before and she darted around behind him before he could turn, grabbing him around the neck and using all of her body weight to yank backwards, cutting off his air supply.
He struggled for a second, face turning red, but her size played against her again and he swung her around easily, prised her fingers off his throat and held both her hands in just one tight fist. She glanced up at him and yanked away from him desperately, trying to push on his chest with her feet for any extra purchase. Grinning, Edgar raised his spare hand and slapped her hard across the cheek, her head jerking to the side with the force of the blow. The sound seemed to echo and Lyra's brain melted with panic as she struggled to get away from him, pupils blown wide with fear as her chest heaved.
Dorcas looked across at Mason with wide eyes and shook her head, trying to get him to end the fight. "Mason, end it! Edgar – let her go!"
Edgar didn't let go. He stared Lyra in the eye, his grip tightening painfully around her wrists and lifting his hand again.
"Bones," Mason snarled, stepping forwards immediately: it wasn't only Dorcas who had picked up on something more than adrenaline in Lyra's body language.
Edgar's hand seemed to Lyra to move in slow motion: she felt his muscles tense as he moved his arm back and she desperately reached out with her mind with everything she had left.
The gym bag slammed into the side of his head before he could move his hand any closer and he dropped her to the floor throwing his arms up to protect himself. She scrambled backwards frantically and rammed straight into Mason who had lunged forwards to intervene.
"What the fuck?" someone said as Lyra stood up shakily, clinging to his arms.
She turned back around to see Edgar shoving the bag off and staring at her in abstract horror.
"Was that wandless magic?"
"It had to be, we don't have our wands on us."
"Is he hurt?"
"Is she hurt? That was insane."
Mason's expression was one of cold fury. "Bones. Kindly explain what the fuck just happened."
Dorcas pushed her way over to Lyra and tugged her backwards gently, rubbing her arms to stop her shivering.
"What do you mean? She just threw this at me! She could've killed me!"
"It's a gym bag, Bones, not a boulder," Mason sneered. "I meant before that. When you'd clearly won the fight, were told to stop twice and then continued to terrorise her for no good reason."
Edgar opened his mouth and then closed it again, realising there was nothing he could say.
"We're done here. Bones, walk yourself to Auror Moody's office. I'd like you to explain the events of today and the other week to him. Tell him I sent you and that you're to see him right away. Apologise for the interruption and let him know I'll be along shortly."
He didn't dare do anything else but nod and leave silently, the door clicking shut behind him with a sense of finality.
"We're finished for today, we'll catch up on the rest tomorrow. The rest of the day is yours," Mason called and everyone hastily dispersed, relieved to be well away from the situation.
Dorcas had found Lyra her jumper and sat her down on one of the benches against the wall. Going over to them, Mason crouched down in front of her, opened the gym bag and quickly transfigured one of the towels into an ice pack, gingerly holding it against her already bruising cheek.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"For what? Stopping him from hurting you?" Mason said, his lips curling in anger. "You did nothing wrong."
"Not for that, for freaking out – causing a scene," she mumbled, and Dorcas squeezed her hand comfortingly.
"You were way calmer than I would've been in that situation," Dorcas promised, "He fully deserved it."
"What will happen to him?" Lyra asked, watching Mason from under her eyelashes as she adjusted the ice pack.
Mason raised an eyebrow. "Technically Moody has the final say, but I'm going to push very strongly for him to be kicked out if Moody doesn't do it by the time I get there. Being an
Auror is a position of responsibility and you shouldn't be one if you get off on hurting people."
"I shouldn't have thrown the bag," Lyra protested.
"No, technically you shouldn't have, but the fact that you did was… awesome," he chuckled, "You won't get in trouble for that. He very much started it. I know it might not have been entirely intentional but wandless magic is a very useful thing to master if you're good enough. And I have a feeling you are."
She smiled weakly at him and shifted on her seat, tucking away the compliment and letting it bolster her shaky confidence.
"I'm going to go to the office too and make sure the little prick is telling Moody the truth," he smiled back, "You're free to go, but I suggest going to get your ribs checked over just in case. A cracked rib is more common than you think and a little bitch to heal if you don't catch it right away."
"Yes boss," she joked quietly, getting up when he did and bumping into him, sitting back down heavily with a little laugh. "Sorry, poor timing. I promise I'm not trying to fight you too."
"Lyra," Mason said gently, helping her to her feet and pausing. "You know I wouldn't have put you against him if I'd known he'd be like that, right? I feel awful."
She nodded. "I know. Just means I need to work a little harder, right?"
"That's the spirit," he chuckled, watching her guiltily and noticing the way her eyelashes brushed her eyebrows as she looked up at him, her eyes dancing slightly as she watched him back.
Dorcas cleared her throat loudly and Mason looked away, taking a deep breath in.
"Yes, I'm going. I'll come and check on you later, okay? I feel guilty as all fuck"
Lyra laughed slightly and nodded. "See you later."
Mason grinned again and backed away, pointedly ignoring Dorcas' burning gaze as he slipped out of the room.
"Okay, nothing is broken or out of place, you're just going to have some bruising and stiffness for the next couple of days," the Healer promised, handing over a potion that Lyra quickly swallowed. "If anything feels really badly wrong, just come back and let me know."
"I will, thank you," Lyra smiled, hopping off the narrow Hospital Wing bed and zipping her jacket back up.
"And tell your Instructor to go easy on you for at least tomorrow, or he'll have me to answer to!"
"Noted," Mason grinned, leaning against the doorway beside them.
Lyra turned and stared at him, blinking. "What are you doing here?"
"I wondered if you were still here, and since we're finished in Moody's office, I figured I'd swing by," he explained, holding the door for her.
Lyra thanked the Healer again as they left, and she tucked her hands away in the ends of her sleeves. "What's happening to him?"
He glanced down at her and stopped walking for a second. "He's in his room packing his bags."
"Are you joking?" she breathed.
"Not in the slightest. Moody agreed with me – someone who can behave like that shouldn't be left in charge of protecting vulnerable people."
Lyra started walking again, so he followed, giving her the chance to speak first.
"Thank you," she said after a moment of silence, "Part of me wondered whether I hadn't done something to warrant it, or whether maybe I should let him do it. My family have hurt people, Bellatrix was responsible for the death of his friend's family and probably other people he knew too. Channelling the anger somewhere is better than bottling it up."
"But taking it out on you is absolutely not okay," Mason said firmly. "It's a selfish thing to do and we both know it was more than that – he was enjoying it."
Mason had expected Lyra to turn right and head up the stairs to the dorms but she just nodded distractedly at his comment and then continued down the corridor.
"Where are you going?" he snorted.
"Training room," she shrugged.
"Are you serious?"
She turned back and the corner of her lip quirked upwards. "No."
"Not funny, he makes those jokes more than enough. But you can't actually be serious about training now!"
"I just don't want something like that to happen again," she protested, "Practise makes perfect, right?"
"Practise after you've been hurt makes you more hurt," he corrected, hurrying after her.
She laughed, "That is not a saying."
"No, but it's true. If you're going to practise, at least let me help? I know, I know," he said, cutting her off before she could open her mouth fully, "But it won't look dodgy. Not after today! It'll just look like some extra training, which anyone is welcome to!"
She took a deep breath. "Okay then." She could do with the guidance: clearly brute strength wasn't going to be her thing, so she needed help figuring out what was.
Mason grinned and then jogged ahead to hold the door open for her. "You know you're going to regret this, right?"
"I already do," she quipped, shrugging her jacket back off and draping it over a chair.
He kept grinning as he rolled his shoulders. "We'll start with a little fight, a mock one don't worry, and I'll correct you as we go."
"Sure, wouldn't want to get the shit kicked out of me twice in one day," she snorted.
His grin faltered slightly and he ran his eyes over her. "Are you okay to do this?"
"Merlin, yes! I wouldn't agree to it if I didn't feel okay, McKinnon, I promise. I'm weak, not dumb."
He rolled his eyes but nodded, raising his fists. "In which case, go for it."
Lyra grinned wickedly and started to circle him, the pain in her body fading away as her focus narrowed in.
Poking her head into the room at the sound of voices, having been looking for her friend after the nurse told her she'd been discharged, Dorcas stopped and stared. Seeing Lyra laughing as she lunged towards Mason, she smiled privately and leaned against the wall, folding her arms. Maybe she was just obsessed with matchmaking or maybe she just knew these things but whatever it was, she knew she was right about the pair of them. She also knew how this would go – Mason would continue denying it and say he couldn't date a fellow Auror, Lyra would insist that she didn't have time for romance – and she knew she was going to be very frustrated before she saw a happy resolution to this. She shook her head in amusement as Mason tripped backwards, and slipped away, leaving them to it.
Dear Mr and Mrs Black,
I am writing to inform you of your daughter's whereabouts. I'm sure you have been very concerned for her and her safety, as I know that Lyra hasn't been in contact with you. As a dear friend, I was concerned that her estrangement from you would upset her more, so I decided to write to you as soon as I could. I don't mean to betray her trust, but if I were you, I'd want to know too.
Lyra is safe and well here with me. I can't say exactly where that is, because the location is secret, but we're both at Auror training under Auror Moody and it's going really well!
I'm sure Lyra would love to hear from you!
Yours sincerely,
Emma Vanity
PS Please let Regulus know that I'd love to have a catch up once I'm finished. It's been a long time since I've seen him!
September 30th 1980
Emma had honestly expected more of a response from Lyra or her parents following the owl she had sent the previous week. It was now the last day of September, October lurking around the corner, and yet she'd heard nothing. No howler at breakfast, no crying mid sit up. Disappointing. Training had been dull since Edgar left, and they all knew that Lyra had caused that, so Emma had thought it was only fair to cause some trouble for her too – karma, she supposed the Muggles would say.
As she dropped her towel and toiletries back off in the dorm that morning, she noticed Dorcas hunched over Lyra's bed, rubbing her back.
"Is she ill?" she asked imperiously, tying off her freshly washed and plaited hair and smoothing it down with a satisfied smile.
"None of your business, Vanity," Dorcas said with uncharacteristic sharpness. She shifted to sit on the floor by the mattress, and Emma caught a glimpse of Lyra's red-rimmed eyes before they were hidden again by the duvet.
She feigned confusion and slipped over, furrowing her brow. "Oh no! Well, whatever it is, I hope you're feeling better soon," she smiled, the sympathy in her expression not quite reaching her tone. "I'd better get to breakfast, do you want me to tell Auror McKinnon that you'll be late?"
Lyra mumbled a protest quickly as Dorcas spoke over her, "Yes, Emma, that'd be really helpful. We'll be along as soon as we can.""
"No problem," she said sweetly, before practically skipping out of the room, hiding her glee.
Dorcas scowled after her and then clambered onto the narrow bed next to Lyra, wrapping her arms around her properly and tucking her against her despite being much shorter.
"Oh sweetheart, I'm sorry."
"They picked today for a reason," Lyra whispered, squeezing her eyes shut tightly and burying her face further into Dorcas' shoulder. "They had to know."
"They did, I'm sure, and they're cunts," Dorcas promised, stroking Lyra's hair softly and kissing the top of her head. "But this isn't the end. You knew it would end like this eventually, right? When you didn't go back and didn't get married?"
"I know," she wailed, "But not like this."
"No, not like this," Dorcas agreed gently.
Being disowned was something Lyra had accepted but only passively, only in the 'some time in the distant future after training and after trying to change their minds' not 'today on her nineteenth birthday in two lines of her mother's dismissive scrawl'.
I had hoped you were more like Regulus than him. Our home, our money, our name aren't yours. You're no daughter of mine.
No daughter of mine.
No daughter of mine.
No daughter of mine.
When training finished, she had no house to go back to. No money except for the small amount she was would get as an interning Auror. No family.
She'd never been like Sirius. He'd known what he believed in and known it was different to his family and he'd gone out and forged his own path; he'd had the friends and the courage to do that. Regulus loved and was loved by their parents and had never questioned their world view, inheriting both their convictions and the title of heir to the Black family after Sirius left.
Lyra had the curse of being the youngest. She'd grown up seeing Sirius' fall from grace and Regulus' servant-like obedience and knew she couldn't live either of those lives. Her friends were Slytherin, Pure-blood and all in the Sacred Twenty Eight, she had nowhere to run and hide if she decided to leave, but she was terrified at the thought of marrying into the same circles as her family and spending the rest of her life as a housewife and mother, raising children who would end up just like her, never escaping.
The only time Sirius had spoken to her after he ran away was that September when he arrived at school with James Potter in tow looking smug as hell. He'd asked why she didn't leave too, ignoring the fact that she was thirteen and scared and alone. He'd not understood why she'd never even dared to think of a life where she didn't get married after leaving school. He'd shouted at her for being confused, for not knowing what she believed, who she wanted to fight for.
Even now, at nineteen, she felt far too young to be alone.
"Do you want to head to breakfast?" Dorcas asked quietly, "Or do you want to stay here for a bit longer?"
Lyra shrugged helplessly and closed her eyes again.
"I don't know what I want."
Dorcas sighed. "Alright, sweetie. I'm gonna leave you here and go and damage control whatever bullshit Emma is doing as we speak. You know where I'll be if you need me, yeah?"
"Yeah. Thanks, Doe."
Dorcas reached under her bed and pulled out a little wrapped box. "Happy birthday, Ly," she smiled softly, leaving it on the pillow next to her.
Once Dorcas had left the room, letting the silence settle around her, Lyra allowed herself five more minutes of crying before she dragged herself up, wiped her eyes and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She pulled on an extra jumper, shoved some trainers on and grabbed the box. It didn't take long to unwrap – they weren't allowed to leave the compound so it was just covered in paper that Dorcas had drawn flowers on – and she pulled out a little notebook, opening it curiously.
Reasons to Be Happy (add your own!)
1. You're so old now whoop whoop!
2. Once we're done with training we're gonna get drunk and you'll love it
3. I exist which is GREAT
4. You beat me at the 5k run which is fucking impressive
5. Birthdays mean cake and we're gonna get cake later SOMEHOW
6. You're super pretty and I love your hair and eyes
7. You beat up edgar bones (twat)
8. I've seen mason topless and he's SHREDDED
9. Mason's abs deserve two points I cannot tell you how much you're going to love seeing him naked (don't hate me)
10. Life is good!
Happy birthday angel this is a shitty present but seeing as we're PRISONERS here this is all you're going to get :( Hope you're glad you picked me to be friends with because you're stuck with me for life now. Mwah mwah, love Doe xoxo
Lyra laughed out loud. Trust Dorcas to make something so hideously Dorcas to give to her. Despite that, she loved it. It meant more to her than any gift she'd been given before because there was no way to miss the thought and care that had gone into it, references to McKinnon's naked body aside – Lyra knew that was only in there because her friend wanted to set them up and if love could be created by sheer force of will, they'd be married already.
She set the notebook down and sniffed, rubbing her eyes and forcing herself to stand up. The letter from her parents had fallen onto the floor, so she picked it up and screwed it up angrily, dropping it into the bin in the corner and setting it on fire with a dismissive flick of her wrist. Her heart was breaking, but she couldn't let it ruin what was happening now.
She needed to bandage up the cracks and get through the day, the next week, the next month, and deal with it later.
It took her more than hour to wash, taking her time under the boiling hot water and scrubbing her skin clean, and to dress in something suitable but comfortable. She did her makeup as usual, making extra sure to cover the redness still around her eyes but she left her hair down, hoping just for today to not be the centre of some drama and hoping the curtain of hair would help. Her stomach growled but seeing as it was nearly lunch time by this point, she ignored it easily and slipped out of the dorms and headed down to the classroom.
Their physical training had stopped, although there were still regular outdoor sessions and they'd been encouraged to maintain a high level of fitness, and they were now onto the theory side of the job: the law, the limitations of their power as Aurors, techniques for arrests, day to day business and, her favourite part, duelling.
Mostly this meant days of lectures from Auror Moody, McKinnon or a few other Aurors who were involved in the training of the recruits and Lyra was beginning to feel like NEWTs were a walk in the park compared to this. Even so, she loved it and she felt far more comfortable with a set of notes and a quiz deadline, even if a quiz on the rules on magical games in Muggle-populated areas wasn't particularly thrilling.
More pressingly, it meant she needed to get into the lecture theatre, find the seat she knew Dorcas would've saved her and try not to get shouted at for being late.
Bracing herself, she inched the door open, wincing as she slipped into the room.
She looked devastated and his heart rate doubled instantly, faltering slightly as he watched her shut the door behind her.
"Uh, sorry I'm late," she mumbled, her eyes flashing up to where Dorcas was sat at the back.
Dorcas shook her head slightly at him, so he just looked back to Lyra hovering awkwardly by the door and sighed.
"Just take a seat, get the notes quickly."
She bobbed her head and then darted towards the empty seat.
He cleared his throat and glanced back at his notes before addressing the room again. "As I was saying…"
She blushed red and chewed on her lip as she sat down, Dorcas sliding her notebook across quietly, grateful he hadn't made a scene.
It was an easy lecture and so he finished quickly, giving them the rest of the time to catch up and get some extra reading done. Mason sipped his coffee, now cold, and tried to make sure he was looking only at the desk or the room in general, resisting the urge to stare at her shamelessly.
He'd helped her train a few more times but he couldn't use that excuse now the physical side of things was finished and she'd passed well and so the last week they'd not spoken outside of the lectures. Mason hated the fact that he knew exactly how long it had been since they'd spoken and he hated that he was so worried about her entrance today. Emma Vanity and been and let him know that 'poor Lyra' was ill and wouldn't be making the lecture today, and how awful was it to be ill on your birthday of all days, but Dorcas had rolled her eyes behind her so he'd zoned out and then dismissed Emma to her seat once she stopped rambling.
She did look ill, he couldn't lie. Her face was pale underneath the makeup and she seemed shaky and he needed to know what was causing it if it wasn't illness. He realised with a jolt that he'd never seen her hair down either; it fell well past her shoulders and down her back in dark waves and she was forever tucking it behind her ears or wrapping it round her fingers as she read, her lips moving slightly as she followed the words on the paper.
He only realised that he'd spaced out when he heard everyone leaving for lunch, someone stepping in front of him and blocking his view of the room. Startled, he blinked and leaned back in his chair, taking a deep breath and looking up.
"Hi."
"H-hi," he said, taking another gulp of coffee as he realised Lyra was standing in front of him. Shit, had she noticed?
"I just wanted to apologise for coming in late," she admitted. "I had an, uh, interesting morning."
It wasn't about the staring, thank fuck. "Oh, yeah, Vanity said you were ill," he said, trying not to sound too curious.
"Oh, well, I guess she thought I was. I mean, I was, I guess, but I'm okay now," she said with a thin smile.
Mason remained unconvinced both that she'd been ill and that she was fine now. "Are you sure?" he checked, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not saying you look like death but… you look like death."
She snorted slightly. "Merlin, thanks."
"You didn't answer my question."
She swallowed. "Fine. I'm not sure, no. I got an owl from my parents."
"Oh," he said after a beat, not sure if she'd want him to say anything. He'd heard enough from Sirius to know what her parents were like and he could tell she'd been trying to prove something ever since she arrived.
"I knew it was coming, they never approved of me wanting to be an Auror, and I technically got engaged in June so we all knew I was out of time, but I just never expected them to actually do it, you know," she whispered, running her fingers along the edge of the desk.
"Lyra…"
"They disowned me," she said, hearing her voice crack and knowing her attempt to patch up the hurt for later was over. "It's over."
He hadn't even noticed that he'd moved, but he found himself in front of her, his hand on her arm. "I'm sorry, Lyra."
"Don't be," she said, trying to make her voice sound firm. "It's a good thing. I can forget about it now, stop all dreams of going back once this is finished."
"Even so, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say," he mumbled, realising she was trembling like a leaf.
She laughed. "I don't either. I'm about thirty seconds from falling apart because I know I shouldn't be upset, they weren't good people and they would never have let me do what I wanted to do, I would've been miserable. Robert would've made an awful husband and I would've spent the rest of my life married to a man that you were hunting down. But it hurts. They are – were, I don't know – my family, and I lost them."
"Robert Avery?" Mason checked, eyes widening slightly. It really wasn't relevant to any of this, but he had to ask. Sirius had mentioned it at a previous meeting, but he hadn't quite believed it. "You were engaged to Robert Avery?"
She shuddered slightly but nodded. "I was but the ring is at home and, well, I'm not. I've no doubt that now they know where I am it's all been called off. I doubt they'll speak my name out loud anymore."
"It's that bad?"
"To them, I no longer exist," she croaked, shrugging her shoulders helplessly. "Sirius didn't, after he left. There was no trace of him. He's no longer their son, and I'm not their daughter." The dam broke and the tears fell again as she swiped at them angrily.
Mason wrapped his arms around her instinctively, tucking her head under his chin. He knew this definitely broke some rules but he didn't care – she was crying and his mum always said a hug was a good place to start. Lyra hesitated for a moment, but it felt so nice being held that she gripped him back, allowing herself to feel safe and okay even if it was just for a minute.
"It sucks, and I want to go and beat the crap out of them all but I know it wouldn't help," he said gently. "I know Dorcas will be looking after you, but if you ever need someone else to talk to, I'm here. I've been friends with Sirius a long time, I know it was shit and I can always just sit and listen."
She wiped her eyes again on the sleeves of the oversized jumper and pulled away again reluctantly, managing a smile up at him. "Thanks, Mason."
"You called me Mason and not McKinnon," he noted with a grin.
Lyra couldn't help but laugh and glanced up at him, smiling ruefully. "Dorcas wore me down. And it would've felt weird saying your last name then."
"Well I prefer it, makes me feel less old and formal," he chuckled.
"You're not old! Not that I actually know how old you are but you can't be old."
Mason sniggered. "Why thank you. I'm twenty two, actually."
"Only twenty two?" she blinked, surprised even though she wasn't sure what she'd expected him to say.
"Well, twenty three in January, but yeah. Why?"
Her cheeks tinged pink, she shook her head quickly. "I don't know, I just hadn't thought about it. I know you were friends with Sirius but I forgot that you were accelerated through the Auror programme."
He quirked an eyebrow up. "How do you know that?"
"You seriously have to ask? Dorcas told me."
Ah, that made sense. Probably followed by something horrifically embarrassing.
"Typical, should've guessed," he muttered.
"She talks about you a lot. Like… a lot."
Mason rolled his eyes. "Ignore all and anything she says about me, it'll be nonsense."
Lyra's traitorous mind wandered back to the notebook under her pillow (you're going to love seeing him naked) and she flushed an even deeper red.
"Do I want to know?" Mason groaned and she shook her head firmly. "I guess I'll pretend this never happened?"
"Probably wise," Lyra agreed, clearing her throat and smiling. "But I ought to go and get some lunch. Thank you, you know, for the hug and the chat and stuff."
Mason ran a hand through his hair and smiled. "No problem, any time. I wouldn't want you to be upset like that."
"I'll get there," she promised, fiddling with the ends of her sleeves as she backed towards the door. "See you around?"
"Yeah," he grinned, trying not to seem too pleased with himself. "See you around."
The rest of his afternoon was free from teaching because there was an Order mission and he was needed. Dorcas had lectures and couldn't think of a good enough reason to be coincidentally missing so she was having to stay behind. Mason expected that her anger at missing out was lessened by the fact that Lyra would need her today.
He grabbed his stuff and escaped to his room to apparate to the headquarters to prepare and was instantly hit with the chaos and nervousness that seemed to be 24/7 within the Order these days.
"Mason, you made it," Marlene beamed, getting up from the table and pulling him into a tight hug.
He laughed and spun her around easily, kissing her forehead before he set her down. "Hey, Mar, I missed you!"
"I missed you too, but you know how Healer training goes, it's just so intense. Some might even say more intense than Auror training," she sighed wistfully and he rolled his eyes.
"It's a good thing Doe isn't here or you'd get a punch for that."
"Give her my love," Marlene instructed, "But come on, get a move on, we leave soon."
Mason snorted and watched her weave through the room over to the Marauders. She obviously informed them that he was there because they looked up and Sirius broke away to head over to him, pushing through the other people dashing around.
"McKinnon," he said with a quick smile. "Before this shit show gets going, I need to ask you something."
Mason looked at him quizzically. "What is it? If this is you about to ask permission to date Marlene the answer is no."
"It's not that, funnily enough," he said dryly. "I need you to give a letter to Lyra."
"A letter?"
"Yeah," Sirius shrugged. "When you get back tonight, if you can. Before midnight."
"I can't exactly guarantee that I'll be back before midnight, we're attacking a potential Death Eater base, in case you hadn't heard," he said sarcastically.
Sirius just scowled. "Don't be a prick. It's her birthday, okay. And if I'm going to try and make things work or whatever then it might as well start today."
"It's her birthday?" Mason choked. Shit, Vanity had said something about it and he'd just not registered it at all.
Sirius narrowed his eyes at Mason suspiciously. "Why would you care?"
"I don't care, Sirius, I just…" he winced, "She was disowned. Today"
It was Sirius' turn to choke and his grey eyes widened in shock, jaw dropping. "What?"
"She was disowned. Your parents found out where she was and what she was doing and she got the owl today. I just didn't know it was her birthday, they… they disowned her on her birthday," he whispered, the sadness of it finally hitting him.
"Fucking hell," Sirius mumbled, pausing for a moment before he yanked the envelope out of the inside pocket of his leather jacket. "In which case she definitely needs this."
Mason took it carefully and tucked it into his bag on the table. "I'll make sure she gets it, mate."
Sirius smiled gratefully, his eyes drifting back across the room when he heard a familiar laugh. Mason followed his gaze and sighed, his expression softening as he realised Sirius was watching Marlene.
"You know I was joking about the dating thing? I know I should hate the idea of it, but you need to tell her, Sirius," he said quietly, clapping him on the shoulder. "We're all living on borrowed time, don't waste it."
Sirius' jaw clenched slightly, but he nodded and smiled, ducking away to finish preparing.
Mason watched him go and then glanced back pensively at the letter sticking out of his bag. The war was only getting worse, and as much as they tried to deny it, people were dying and friends were going missing. There wasn't time to waste denying feelings when the realisation that any day could be their last was starting to sink in.
"I know you sent the letter to her parents."
Emma looked up from her notes and sighed, adjusting her ponytail as she watched Dorcas slam the door shut and stalk over to her.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You think you're so sneaky but you're a poor excuse for a Slytherin. You couldn't be more obvious than if you'd shit yourself and 'vanished' the evidence," Dorcas laughed.
"Denying it doesn't mean we can't tell it was you."
Emma turned her nose up slightly and ignored her, but this only frustrated Dorcas more and she stood in front of the desk and slammed her hands down on the book in front of the blonde girl.
"You've ruined her life, I hope you're happy. If this is some sick revenge for Edgar – oh yeah, I saw the way the two of you were, we all did – you're going to sorely regret it," she snarled.
Emma put her pen down and folded her arms across her chest. "She ruined Ed's life with that little stunt. If she didn't want to get hurt then she should've worked harder in training."
"Oh go fuck yourself," Dorcas laughed. "Lyra probably wouldn't do anything to you if I told her the truth because she is a nice person unlike somepeople I could name, but that doesn't mean I won't hurt you for this."
"Oh dear Merlin, Gryffindors are so dramatic," Emma yawned.
Dorcas just grinned wider. "You think this is dramatic? Sweetheart, I'm just getting warmed up. Don't fuck with her or me again or you'll find out what I'm really like when I'm dramatic."
"Duly noted, Meadowes," she sneered, picking up her quill again and looking down at the book pointedly, brushing Dorcas' hands off it dismissively.
Dorcas just glowered at her before storming back out of the dormitory, leaving Emma laughing silently.
The raid had gone as well as could be expected: no one was badly hurt, a few Death Eaters had been identified for definite and Mason himself only had a few bruises and a nasty jinx burn on his leg where he hadn't been able to completely dodge the spell. Most importantly to him though was that he was back plenty before midnight.
Dorcas had been waiting in his room to hear the news and when he'd rushed through the night's events and asked where he could find Lyra, she'd practically beamed.
"She's in the library, she wanted to be alone for a bit so she's just doing work. Why do you want to know?" she smirked, kicking her legs as she perched on the edge of his table.
Mason gave her a look and pulled out the thick envelope with Sirius' handwriting scrawled across the front. "He gave me this to pass along. He wanted it to get to her on her birthday."
Dorcas was slightly disappointed it wasn't actually something romantic but she knew the letter would mean a lot to Lyra so she nodded. "Then you'd better hurry up. You've got twenty minutes."
Mason smiled gratefully and ruffled her hair as he went past just to annoy her. "Thanks Doe. Marlene sends her love too."
Dorcas grinned, "Appreciated but get a move on!"
He laughed slightly as he headed out, making his way down to the library on the ground floor. It was dark apart from one lamp in the corner so Mason padded over, finding himself strangely nervous. After the last few weeks and the events of earlier in the day he was finding it harder and harder to act professionally around her and being alone in the library this late felt weirdly intimate.
"Lyra," he said quietly, hovering at the edge of the lamp light and almost regretting disturbing her she looked so peaceful.
She dropped her quill as she jumped and her head snapped up, hair shifting over her shoulder as she turned to look at him, dark eyes wide.
"It's just me, sorry," he chuckled slipping over and sitting down opposite her. "I didn't mean to scare you."
"It's okay," she smiled tiredly, "I just didn't hear you approach. Can I help you?"
"Ah, no, this is just a quick visit. I've got a letter for you."
Her brows furrowed slightly and the colour faded from her cheeks. "I've not had a great day for letters, honestly."
"This is a good one, I promise," he smiled, handing it over and watching her carefully.
She recognised the handwriting immediately – of course she did – and her face remained pale as she took it from him tentatively. Mason held his breath as her fingers brushed his and he remembered after a beat too long to draw his hand back to his side of the table. She didn't seem to notice though, she was running her hands over the ink on the front.
"Lyra?"
"Hmm?" she said absentmindedly, putting the letter down like it had burned her hands.
"He wanted you to have it today, on your birthday."
She hated how much she blushed around him but she found herself doing it again. "Oh."
"I know today's not exactly been great, it feels hollow wishing you a happy birthday, but I hope the letter makes up for it a little bit," he smiled.
"Thank you," she smiled back, her eyes sparkling slightly in the glow of the lamp. She noticed the bags under his eyes and the shallow cut on his cheek and she bit her lip to avoid commenting out of concern. The yellow light was making him look both much older and much younger than twenty two and she had a feeling there was something going on that was much bigger than she could comprehend. After all, he'd somehow seen Sirius tonight and had returned with cuts and scrapes and she didn't quite know what to make of it. Despite all of that, he'd bothered to come and find her to deliver the letter before the end of the day, and the knowledge made her chest tighten in a funny way.
"You should get some rest, you look shattered," she said, tilting her head to the side.
"Rude," Mason grinned, "But true." He reluctantly stood and stretched, glancing at the letter again. "I'll leave and let you read it alone, I feel like it's not meant for anyone else to see."
"Thank you, and thank you for bringing it to me," Lyra said, her eyes following him as she tucked herself up on the chair and picked up the letter again. She kind of wished he wouldn't go, but would never ask him to stay.
"You're welcome. I hope it makes today slightly less shitty."
"I think today is a lost cause, but there's this cool thing about days, at midnight you get a new one," she grinned.
Mason laughed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Wow, that's so deep, a really wise person must've said that."
"Wise and devastatingly beautiful," Lyra smirked.
He couldn't find a reply to that that wasn't far too honest so he just smirked back and nodded quickly. "Night."
"Sleep well," she called after him, watching him in the dark until he vanished down the corridor.
