20th October 1980

"They're here!" Dorcas whooped, recognising the sound of the Portkey appearing in the courtyard outside.

Lyra laughed as Dorcas raced to the window to see if the first arrivals were her family. Because the location was secret, the guests couldn't just Floo in and, in the case of Dorcas' Muggle family, they couldn't apparate in even if they did know where they were going. Portkey had been the best way to get everyone in, because it didn't require knowledge of the location at the other end like most magical forms of transportation, but it did mean the Portkey itself had to go backwards and forwards from the Ministry in London to the training compound so everyone was arriving one at a time.

They'd both dressed nicely for the occasion, Lyra having to wear her own clothes this time because none of Dorcas' dresses fitted the much shorter Lyra, and she was in the only Muggle piece of clothing she'd managed to buy after leaving home, a white sundress that had been the first thing she'd seen in the Muggle fashion shop on Diagon Alley.

Lingering at the back of the room, Mason put his hands in his pockets and watched the excitement of all the recruits bubble over as the first boy ran out to greet his family. He was dressed in Muggle clothing too, today being a very informal day, and was wishing he wasn't overseeing it because he wanted to see his own family. Between training here, Order work and his regular Auror work, he'd not managed to get home at all for over a month and he knew his mum was worried. But that would have to wait, and there were only a few more weeks of this phase of the Auror training anyway and then things would mostly go back to normal.

Lyra was next to Dorcas at one of the windows, gripping the windowsill and staring at the spot where the Portkey would materialise, hardly daring to believe that Sirius would appear there soon. Dorcas glanced across and smiled.

"He'll be there, don't worry!"

"I don't know whether I'm more worried about him not arriving or about him being here," Lyra admitted, jumping slightly as the next family arrived, one of the girls in their dorm squealing and pushing her way to the door.

"It'll be okay," Dorcas promised, "And if it's not I will kick his fucking ass."

Lyra laughed at that and nodded, "Thanks."

"I can't wait for my little siblings to see this place, they're going to go mental," Dorcas grinned, hoping some background chatter would calm Lyra's nerves. "There's three little ones, all girls, and my brother. Mum and Dad had their hands full!"

Lyra smiled, but the prospect of meeting her friend's family – all Muggles – was almost as unnerving as meeting Sirius again.

The Portkey reappeared, this time with just one person.

"There he is," Lyra said, choking slightly as she watched Sirius tug his leather jacket into place and set down the hat stand the Ministry had used for the Portkey.

"Go!" Dorcas grinned, shoving Lyra away from the window and waving to Sirius who saw her and laughed, waving back.

Lyra half stumbled to the door, feeling Mason's eyes on her too, and slipped outside to meet Sirius, cheeks flushed with nerves.

"Hi," Sirius called, shoving his hands deep into his pockets as she approached, smiling shyly.

"Hi," she replied, licking her lips. "It's nice to see you."

Sirius hesitated for a moment, but he closed the final step between them and hugged her quickly, pulling her up onto her tiptoes as she laughed quietly. "It's nice to see you too, L. You look well."

"Thanks, you do too," she smiled, tucking her hair behind her ears as they let go. "We should probably find somewhere else, they'll want the space for the others to come in."

"Shit, yeah, uh, lead the way I guess," Sirius smiled ruefully, glancing around him in amusement. "Seeing as we could literally be anywhere. It's weird."

"You get used to the not knowing, honest," Lyra laughed, setting off towards the little path that wound around the edge of the training field and the buildings.

They fell into a nearly comfortable silence as they set off, Sirius watching her curiously. It had been a year since he'd seen her last, and even before he'd graduated he'd not exactly looked closely at her or Regulus for fear of letting down the walls he'd built up so carefully. She'd grown, although not much because she was at least a head and a half shorter than he was, and she had a healthy glow to her skin that he assumed came from the training here. But the biggest difference was the way she held herself: he'd only ever seen her at Grimmauld Place or at school still under the influence of their parents and her back had been straight, her posture perfect, her head tilted up, carefully poised; now she seemed to glide, her actions more carefree, her hair loose down her back. He liked it, she looked more like the little kid he remembered than the young woman she'd been moulded into.

"How's the training going?" Sirius ventured, clearing his throat.

"It's going well, yeah!" she said, a little too enthusiastically, tripping over the words to get the conversation going. "We've got exams after this, the actual training is finished, hence the visit now because it's not going to distract us from anything, and then we move back to the real world and do another ten weeks of interning. We're assigned an Auror and we work with them, we shadow them and help out with smaller bits of work!"

"Yeah, Mason explained, it sounds awesome," Sirius laughed. "Nearly considered doing this too, but I have no ability or inclination to follow orders."

"What do you instead?" Lyra asked, curiously. "Do you work?"

"Nah, Uncle Alphard left me enough money when he died to get myself a place and I have enough to not have to work. I… do other things."

Lyra raised an eyebrow slightly. "Other things?"

"War related things, to help, you know," Sirius shrugged, having been given strict instructions not to mention the Order of the Phoenix to her yet.

"Oh, wow, okay," she nodded, swallowing hard. "Well I hope finishing training and getting to do some real work will help too, I spent too long thinking it wasn't my war."

"Good to hear," Sirius said gruffly, halting in his path. "I'm glad you left, but…"

"Why didn't I do it sooner?" Lyra finished for him, stopping too and looking up at him, her features mirrored on his face, the Black genetics evident. "I… I was scared, Sirius."

"I left," he pointed out, "And I was scared too."

"I know you're angry," she whispered, feeling sick with nerves at the sudden change in topic – this was the conversation they should've had years ago. "I'm angry with myself too. Being here, becoming friends with Dorcas, it's opened my eyes. I didn't leave for the same reasons that you did and I should've done, I should've cared more, but it's not like I didn't care either, Sirius. I just didn't know."

"And I tried to tell you!" Sirius said, trying and failing to keep the snap out of his voice.

"No, Sirius, you lectured me," Lyra said warningly, "You lectured a scared thirteen year old about things I had no chance of understanding. I had no friends like Potter to tell me where I was going wrong, I had our parents clamping down on me and Reg when they saw you drifting."

"Fine, but it took you this long? It took you six years? What about when they burned my name off the family tree for disagreeing? When Bellatrix killed her first Muggle? When your fiancé attacked Mary MacDonald?"

"If you were me, what would you have done?" Lyra said firmly. "Tell me. If you were me, not you."

"I'd have left!"

"And gone where? Who would've taken me in? The Slytherin Pureblood friends I was raised with? You?"

"It doesn't matter! You could've fought back!"

"And this summer when I tried to fight back, Robert hit me and threatened me with far worse. I did what I could, and I had to have a back-up plan before I just left. Being an Auror is my plan, I'll have a wage now – I wasn't gifted money by any relatives, remember? – and now I have friends who can help me. I waited because I needed an escape route first. Your escape route fell into your lap when you were sorted into Gryffindor and met Potter. I had to create my own."

Sirius had the sense to look ashamed. "I hadn't thought about it like that," he admitted after a long pause.

"And, Sirius, I'm not saying our parents didn't fuck you up, but it was so different for me. The control was different, the mentality in our circles isn't the same towards boys, you always had more freedom. Please understand that I wanted to do something a long time ago, I knew it was wrong and that I was trapped, but that I couldn't, because the only family member who I thought might help me wasn't in contact with me," she whispered.

"It goes two ways, Lyra, you could've owled me, or found me at school-"

"I know, Sirius, it was my fault too, I'll never deny that. But it's different now, I left and I have no intention of going back. I just want that to be enough for you," she admitted quietly. "Because I missed you. I missed my big brother."

"I missed you too, you're the only person apart from Remus who could ever talk sense into me," Sirius admitted, shaking his head.

"The past still matters, I'm not going to deny I made mistakes too, Sirius, but I just want to move past it. Is that okay?" she asked gently.

Sirius stayed quiet for a long, nerve-wracking silence and then nodded. "It was a long time ago, and you're here now, that's all that matters."

"Good," she smiled, her eyes brightening. "Now tell me about the girl?"

"Oh Merlin, you're awful. You asked in every letter!"

"Because I want to know! What happened to the fifteen year old who declared he'd never fall in love or get married?" she teased.

Sirius glared at her jokingly, "I'm not married. Or in love. We're… just on and off."

"Which, from what I remember from school is more than most get, correct?"

"Correct," Sirius grumbled.

Lyra looked smug. "What's her name?"

"Marlene McKinnon," Sirius laughed. "Mason's sister."

Lyra choked slightly, "As in, uh, Mason Mason?"

"How many Masons do you know?" Sirius grinned, "Why, is that a problem?"

"Uh, no, I just didn't know that you were dating his sister, he never said," Lyra said faintly. Was it weird that she was also falling for a McKinnon? It certainly felt weird.

"Why would he say? Are you two friendly?" Sirius said, his eyes narrowing to slits, remembering Mason's reaction when Sirius had asked him to give Lyra the letter.

"Well he's an instructor here, and him and Dorcas are friends so we've chatted a few times," Lyra said hastily. She'd also daydreamed about kissing him and imagined him naked but she doubted Sirius would want to know about those things.

"Hmmm."

"What?"

"Not sure I approve, can't have just anyone being friends with my little sister," Sirius teased.

She breathed a secret sigh of relief. "Well don't get all protective, I can look after myself."

"I'm sure you can," Sirius said genuinely, watching her for a moment. "Oh, I almost forgot! I brought you a late birthday present!"

"You didn't have to do that!" she laughed, "Wasn't the letter the birthday present?"

"A poor substitute, but I wanted to give this to you in person," Sirius smiled, bringing out the little felt pouch from his pocket. "I remembered you loved sapphires, and Lene said something about them being your birthstone too? Not sure what that is exactly, maybe it's a Muggle thing, but they're really pretty anyway, so…"

Lyra opened the pouch carefully and removed the delicate silver chain with the sapphire crystal dangling on the end and gasped, holding it up to the light, watching the blue light refract off the faces of the gem and onto her skin. "Sirius, it's… stunning. They're so expensive, you really didn't have to."

He shrugged. "Consider it six years of birthdays and sorrys in one. Blue suits you anyway," he smiled, watching as she put it on, the sapphire settling against her chest, glinting in the sunlight.

Once it was secure, she slipped the felt pouch into her pocket and threw her arms around him.

"The other half of your present is just the promise that you can share Uncle Alphard's money if you need it. I know you'll need to find a place soon, and if they need a deposit, or you need anything you couldn't take from home, the money is yours. He gave it to me to help me become independent from them so I know he would've wanted you to have some now too."

"Thank you," she said gently, squeezing him tightly. The ache of losing her family was dulling now even if it still hurt, but knowing she had Sirius back was comforting.

"Don't mention it," Sirius said breezily but the the corners of his mouth were curled up happily as he hugged her back.

Lyra fiddled with the necklace as she pulled away, unsure of what to talk about next now the big issues were out on the table. She was spared the awkwardness as she turned her head at a yell from the courtyard and several excited shrieks.

"LYRA! GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!"

"Muggle Jesus," Sirius snorted, "She's always so fucking loud."

"Tell me about it," Lyra muttered, but she headed back towards where the Portkey was, bracing herself for Dorcas' family who must've been making the rest of the noise. She tucked and retucked her hair behind her ears, licking her lips as she tried to smooth her dress down, trying to remind herself that Dorcas' family would not care and that the voice in her head telling her to check her appearance, her posture, her words, was just a ghost that couldn't hurt her and didn't matter.

"There you are!" Dorcas grinned as the pair rounded the corner. "Okay so I'll introduce you and then we can go and find some lunch maybe? The twins are really hungry already and they get crabby when they're hungry."

Sirius muttered something about catching up with Mason and Lyra tried not to look too petrified as Dorcas hooked her arm through her friend's and tugged her over.

"Uh, Doe, I'm really not-"

"My Mum will insist she try to feed you up although I've warned her you're funny about food, she mentioned bringing some pampushka."

"Doe, I'm awful with kids and-"

"Nonsense, come on!" Dorcas grinned, knowing that if she allowed her to self-sabotage and run off to hide, Lyra would only feel worse. "Ly, I wouldn't do this if I you were genuinely scared."

"How do you know I'm not genuinely scared?" Lyra said indignantly.

"You hyperventilate when you're freaking out," Dorcas shrugged, tapping her temple with a little grin. "I notice these things. But listen, as a back-up, if you need to take a break, just make some excuse and retreat to the dorm okay? I'll make sure no one follows."

"Thank you," Lyra said, breathing a sigh of relief. "I know I'm dramatic, it just feels a little overwhelming."

"Well think fast, kid," Dorcas grinned, "Here's Mum."

"You must be Lyra!"

Before she could even turn and smile, Lyra found herself spun into a tight hug.

"I'm Ruslana, Dorcas' mother! I hope my daughter's been good to you!"

"Mum," Dorcas whined, rolling her eyes. "When am I not good to people?"

Ruslana gave her daughter an amused look and then handed Lyra a tupperware tub filled with what looked like dumplings. "These are pampushka, Dorcas told me the food here was awful-"

"Mum, I did not say that!"

"And so I made some, because you girls are burning so many calories with this training I can just feel it!"

Lyra took the container carefully, frowning at it.

Dorcas clocked on after a few moments of Lyra turning it over in her hands. "Oh my God," she laughed, earning a tut from her mum for the blasphemy, "Do you not know what Tupperware is? It's plastic!"

"Plastic," Lyra repeated, still frowning.

"Yeah, I completely forgot that it was a Muggle thing! It's genius, Ly, I missed it at Hogwarts. It just keeps stuff fresh in the box, and you can wash it and reuse it. Tupperware is so handy, we have so much of it!"

"Ah, so your parents are both magical?" Ruslana said knowingly, "Well I can assure you our world can be just as confusing as yours can be."

Lyra nodded automatically, glancing back down at the box in her hand in wildly confused amusement.

"Dorcas, Dorcas!"

The excited chorus of squeals reminded her that Ruslana was not the only member of the family she had to meet, and Lyra looked up and widened her eyes as the two little girls bounced towards them.

"Come here, you monsters," Dorcas grinned, scooping up the first one to reach her, the other hanging off her legs. "These are the twins, Judith and Grace. They're three, they're so grown up now! And this is my slightly older but still younger sister, Ruth, aged nine and three quarters," she laughed, Ruth sidling over after the twins and offering Lyra a shy smile. "And somewhere is Reuben. He's, what, sixteen now? Way too cool for us all."

"And your father, of course."

"And Dad, yeah," Dorcas grinned, "He'll be having a nosey around elsewhere."

"It's lovely to meet you all," Lyra said but even she could tell she didn't sound too thrilled. Her voice was definitely shaky and she felt like she was sweating a weird amount.

Dorcas just laughed and put Grace down as the pair of girls scampered off towards their brother. Squeezing her friend's hand, Dorcas tucked the box of baking into the bag she'd brought for this exact purpose (her mother was nothing if not predictable) and scanned the area for Mason.

"Oi, McKinnon!" she yelled, hands cupped around her mouth.

Mason looked up, as did Sirius who had been chatting to him, and grinned, winding his way through the now crowded area, the rest of the recruits' families having arrived.

"Ah, this is your friend Mason! Very handsome, no?" Ruslana said, winking at Lyra, who flushed.

Dorcas rolled her eyes and leaned into Lyra. "She doesn't know about me being, you know, yet, so she wants him and I to be a thing. It's really funny because he totally goes along with it."

"Is Mason not sick of being set up with everyone he knows?" Lyra smirked, giving Dorcas a look. Clearly she got the love of matchmaking from her mum.

"Yes," Mason replied, arriving in earshot and smirking back at her. "Mrs Meadowes, it's lovely to see you again!"

"Ah, you, call me Ruslana! I say this every time!" she beamed, kissing both his cheeks happily, "Lovely to see you too!"

"Are you as lost as I am?" Lyra asked him, Dorcas having suddenly vanished to hunt down some three year olds, she suspected.

"No, my family is pretty much the same," Mason grinned, "My mum also sets me up with anyone and everyone Marlene brings round for dinner."

"Is it dumb that I didn't realise that Dorcas' family would also be black?" Lyra asked quietly, eyes darting around awkwardly.

Mason raised an eyebrow slowly. "What were you expecting? She gets it from her dad."

"No, I know, I just… I just hadn't pictured it. I don't know any families like hers, the Pureblood community is… very white."

"I suppose so," Mason shrugged. "You get used to it. It's hardly a big deal."

She flushed with indignation. "I'm not saying that, I was just surprised."

"Hey, I know," he said gently, "And Dorcas knows too. If it helps, it's just as much of a culture shock for them as it is for you, you being magical through and through. This is a whole new world for them too, I doubt they really understood it when their only connection was Hogwarts."

Lyra adjusted the necklace clasp for something to do with her hands because she was very paranoid that her hands were shaking. "True. I just hate feeling out of my depth, it's infuriating and I feel like I'm coming across like a massive bitch."

"You're not, promise," Mason smiled.

"Forgive me if I don't quite believe you."

Mason laughed as the Meadowes clan assembled around them and Dorcas directed them all back inside towards the canteen, the sound of the younger girls clamouring for attention ringing in her ears. She felt a hand slide into hers and looked down in surprise, seeing Ruth watching her with wide eyes, her other hand gripping a very battered children's book.

"Uh, hi," Lyra said, clearing her throat and offering the little girl a smile. She was useless with kids, mostly because she was terrified of them. She felt no one really believed her when she said that, but even now with Ruth's big doe eyes staring at her, assessing her, she felt panicked.

"Ruthie, sweetheart, do you want to sit with Lyra for lunch?" Dorcas called, herself trying to keep hold of the twins who seemed to want to race to the food.

Ruth nodded solemnly, hugging the book to her chest.

"You've been accepted, Ly," Dorcas grinned, "That's it for life."

Lyra laughed nervously, hoping her expression signalled her panic to Dorcas but Dorcas wasn't looking – she was yelling as Judith made a break for it, her little legs pumping as she giggled manically. Unfortunately for Judith's escape plan, she made it just a few metres before Mason easily grabbed her under the arms and picked her up; she didn't seem to mind much and wrapped her arms around his neck, still giggling and squirming.

"Gotcha," Mason grinned.

Judith, obviously deciding that this new vantage point was much more fun than walking with Dorcas, settled into his arms happily and stayed quiet for once as Mason dropped back to rejoin the others.

"Mason, maybe you will convince Dorcas to give me grandchildren?" Ruslana teased, earning another eye roll from her daughter.

"Mum please," she groaned as Mason smirked at her.

"You'd love my mum, I know she's secretly devastated she's not got any yet either, honestly. She's been planning it all out for years," he joked, shifting his grip on Judith easily, freeing his other hand so Grace could cling onto it, not wanting her sister to have all the fun.

"Me and Ly can start the 'no kids please' club," Dorcas sniggered, "I have enough little siblings for that."

"You don't want kids?" Mason asked Lyra in surprise. He wasn't sure why he'd have thought otherwise, she hardly seemed like a maternal type, but he'd also never considered not having kids himself and somehow these days she was tangled up in all those thoughts.

Lyra scrunched her nose up slightly. "I don't know. They scare me, all the crying and attention and honestly, I just always assumed I'd have to have them so now I have the choice I'm not sure anymore. It'll probably change, but for now – nope."

Although seeing him there with the two toddlers in his arms as they begged him to swing them along the corridor, she got the appeal – he was hot all the time but even more so now. Her eyes followed him down the corridor as he chatted to the twins like he'd known them his whole life and she only stopping watching them when she felt Ruth tug on her sleeve, a secret smile on her lips.

"Do you have a crush on him?" she whispered up to Lyra.

Lyra looked down at her surprised and opened her mouth to say something, hesitating when she realised she wasn't sure how to actually talk to a nine year old. She settled on just talking to her normally, because she knew anything else would've pissed her off at that age.

"Is it really obvious?" Lyra said sheepishly, and Ruth giggled delightedly.

"You think he's really handsome? Have you kissed him?"

"Yes, and no," Lyra laughed slightly as she answered both questions, "I want to though." Why on earth was she telling all of this to a little girl? She wasn't sure.

"He wants to kiss you too," Ruth assured her, "You can always tell."

"Yeah?" Lyra smiled, "How do you know?"

Ruth removed her hand from Lyra's to hold up the book she was carrying. "He's like Gilbert!"

"Who is Gilbert?" Lyra said, taking the book from her carefully and flipping it over to read the blurb.

Ruth looked positively thrilled to have been asked and took a deep breath before she launched into an explanation. "Gilbert is a boy at the school with Anne! They hate each other to start with because she's just as clever as him and broke a slate over his head when he insulted her but Gilbert really really fancies her like Mason fancies you and he saves her on his boat because he loves her and she doesn't know it but we do because it's super obvious but then she realises she loves him too and they end up getting married and they have lots of kids!"

There wasn't much that Lyra and Ruth could really have in common – but a love of reading was obviously one of them. Lyra handed back the clearly treasured book and nodded at Ruth's explanation.

"The book sounds really good! How did you know that he loves her before she knew?" she asked, more than happy to talk books for the rest of the time as she realised she felt far happier around the girl when they were talking about a safe topic.

"He compliments her loads and offers to help her even though she doesn't need it and he always defends her from the other boys at their school when they're little and he doesn't go out with anyone else even though he's really handsome! Also she gets proposed to by someone else and he gets really really sad! It's sooo obvious!"

Lyra laughed. "So this Anne, she's the main character?"

"Yes! I want to be just like her when I'm older except I maybe want to be a doctor not a teacher. I wish I had red hair, Anne has red hair," she sighed, brushing her own plaited hair over her shoulder and imagining what it would look like as a sleek auburn colour not her own frizzy black.

"I love your hair," Lyra said quickly, "My hair never looks nice and curly like yours, and you can do all sorts of lovely stuff with yours. I watched Dorcas re-braiding her hair the other day but she says you're the best with hair, better than your mum!"

Ruth's skin darkened with embarrassment as she looked up at Lyra from under her lashes. "You really like my hair?"

"It's beautiful, I promise," she smiled, taking her hand again. "And I bet Anne would want you to love your hair too, she seems like the kind of person who'd say that."

Ruth squished up to her side, the book tucked back under her arm in its rightful place. "I could do your hair if you wanted me to?"

"I'd love that," she promised, "After lunch maybe?"

The little girl nodded excitedly, skipping to catch up with her siblings but glancing over her shoulder with a little grin, seeing that Mason and Lyra were now the only ones left in the corridor, Ruslana and Joseph having taken the twins from Mason to get them settled.

"Scared of kids my ass," Mason smirked, waiting by the door for her. "You were getting on like a house on fire!"

"She barely counts as a kid, she's what, nine? The little ones that you had, however? Terrifying," Lyra smiled, shrugging.

"Still, you did well," he grinned, holding the door open for her.

Lyra flashed him a smile that made his heart skip a beat. "Thanks. You were a natural!"

Mason shrugged. "I've always liked kids, and I've got experience which I suppose makes a difference."

"Oh, your brother, right? Mark?"

"Good memory," he laughed, and she blushed, knowing she remembered because she daydreamed about most of their interactions. "But yes, with Mark and also James and Lily's kid, Harry. He's just under six months, he's the sweetest little thing."

She shuddered, "I really don't think I'd cope with a baby baby."

"Awh come on, they're so cute and chubby!" he pouted, grabbing some food and dumping it on his tray.

Lyra rolled her eyes. "You wouldn't be the one pushing it out though," she retorted as she did the same and headed through the chaotic canteen towards the table that the Meadowes family had commandeered.

Grimacing, Mason elbowed her shoulder. "That's playing dirty, fucking hell! Phantom pains!"

"Ha," she smirked smugly. "Now you get it."

Ruth had guaranteed she was next to Lyra by saving her a seat and so Lyra squeezed in between Dorcas and her little sister, Mason opposite them, pulling faces at the twins in their highchairs. Lunch time was, as all lunch times are with anyone under the age of nine, a mess: there was plenty of food on the floor and not on the plates, plenty of whining from the two youngest and plenty of Reuben being reminded to put his comic away and actually talk to people. Sirius had also joined them after he'd gone for a self-guided tour around the place and he was now chatting with Mason animatedly, making even more noise at the table. To her own surprise, Lyra found herself slowly beginning to enjoy herself, even if keeping up with that many conversations at once was exhausting. She wasn't sure how Dorcas managed it all the time but then again she supposed that growing up with it made a big difference.

Eventually Mason remembered that he was also supposed to be helping supervise the visitors so once the day was over, he helped the other Aurors round up all the guests and guide them back to the Portkey. No one wanted to say goodbye, but Lyra reminded them that there were only a few weeks until they finished their training here and headed back out into the wizarding world to continue the programme, and that they would see them all again then.

"I hate that them leaving means it's revision time," Dorcas grumbled, leaning against the wall and waving one last time as the Meadowes family and Sirius disappeared with the hat stand.

"Only three weeks, Doe, we can do this," Lyra smiled, glancing across at her friend.

"Three weeks," Dorcas replied grimly, "Let's just hope we fucking pass."