The Hand Witch

Hey-yo everyone! What's up, I'm back with a new chapter. Hope you guys are happy to have the next chapter up and ready to read. Enjoy.

'Bill thinking'
'Dipper thinking'
"Bill mind/dream scape talking"
"Dipper mind/dream scape talking"


It's been four days since Dipper and Bill merge into one being. So far it was going semi okay, If you count you senses are so low that to track a out law criminal demon that might be half way across the multiverse by now.

Needless to say, Bill has been throwing a tantrum in their sleep about not having stronger senses or powers. It's been rough for him for the past four days. Not only that, but to learn that he and Dipper can share each other's memories was didn't helped at all.

On the other hand though, it's also a good opportunity for Dipper to see what Bill's life was before he was summoned here. But the off chance of getting attack by the said dream demon for invading his personal life memories, is one hundred percent chances of eternal suffering. And maybe death.

Best to keep a safe distance and wait until he's ready.

Time Skip brought to you by Thing. The disembody hand.

Mabel was the first person to wake up, with a smile on her face she greets her brother up, "Good morning, Dip-Bill!" Dipper/Bill moans "Five more minutes. That's the worst name calling I ever heard, Shooting Star."

Mabel then had an interesting thought in her head and decided to use it, "Come on, Bildip!" that woke them up, and made their face red with... well everything that's anger and embarrassing "That's even Worst!" Bill and Dipper yelled at the same time. 'That was weird.' Mabel thought as she recalls the first and second time she heard them spoke at the same time. 'I guess I had my head rapped around when it came to fashion and finding a girl for Soos to even notice. I better talk to them about it.'

"Sorry, I'll take that idea off the list. But seriously, Dipper. Bill. Did either of you notice that you both talk at the same time just now?" said Mabel with concern in her voice.

Neither Dipper or Bill realized it until Mabel pointed out, "No. I haven't. Neither did I." Before Dipper/Bill started panicking, Mabel puts her hands up and tries to calm him down, "Okay, let's not panic here. It could be a new weird thing the two of you can do, like how me and you can sometimes say the same thing what we are thinking or agree on."

Dipper/Bill's eyes widen at the thought, "That could be it! The two of us agreeing on something and saying exactly what we wont to say." "So does that mean it's kind of a good thing or a bad thing?" Mabel ask, the 2 and a half of them thought for a while before they heard their Grunkle Stan calling them for breakfast. "Let's put it in the so-so pile for now." Bill/Dipper answers, as they made their way to the kitchen.

After their breakfast, Stan announces that they are closing up the shack for today and head out to the town's annual Swap Meets. Figure that it would be a good time to have a family outing together and see what people are selling.

Once they got their, Dipper/Bill decided to pull his hoodie jacket over his head so that no one would be staring at him all day. The entrance way was handing out free balloons to everyone, Dipper/Bill grab one for Mabel if she didn't find anything at the "Swap meet, swap meet, swap meet!" Mabel cheered with excitement, as she and her family starts to look around "Look at all these priceless treasures! Bobbly heads!"

Mabel ran her finger over them to make their heads bob, "They agree with everything I say." Dipper/Bill found some glasses on display and tried them on, "Professor glasses! They make me look like a genius!" 'Or a nerd.' Bill joke in their head, only to have their body crash into the display stand. 'Okay, that hurt a bit.'

Not to far away, Stan saw some stylish gold watches, and looks at them with greed in his eyes. "Look at these faux-gold beauties! They're mob boss quality!" He sees the old lady looking up at him over her magazine suspiciously.

Stan turns away and kneels down to his grand niece and nephew and said "Okay, kids. Prepare to watch the delicate art of the deal." Bill/Dipper crosses his arms and said "This should be good."

The old con tourist trap man slams his hand on her counter and act like he's not so much interested in the watches. "Hey Hagface! How much for the junk watches?" He says in a rude tone of voice.

The old lady wasn't phase at his actions, "They are not for sale! NOT FOR YOU, STAN PINES! THE WIND WHISPERS YOUR NAME!" The wind blows around them, make Dipper/Bill feel unsettle by this. Next to them was Tyler Cutebiker's wind chimes, "Shush, you guys." It just has to be a weird coincidence that the wind started blowing and the old lady was just pulling their leg. But this is Gravity Falls, so it's not a coincidence.

"Alright, I get it, you're creepy. Anyway, less talky, more watchy." Said Stan as he set the money down and picks up a watch, only to get grab at by the lady who yells at him as her voice deepens and her eyes roll to the back of her head. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY WAAATCHH!"

Scare out of his wits, Stan tugs his arm free and leaves with the kids, "Yeesh, freak show!" "Wow. Someone needs to work on their social skills." Mabel commented, "And their observation skills. Boom!" Stan flashes the watch he stolen on his wrist, "Good job, heisting hands." and then kiss his hands.

Both Bill and Dipper were skeptical about this, "Grunkle Stan, are you seriously shoplifting from a witch? That sounded like a curse." said Dipper/Bill "I know witches curses when I see one, Fez. You got yourself screwed over big time."

But Stan being Stan did what he does best at, mock at the person. "That sounded like a curse. I know a curse when I see one." he then yells out to everyone like a sales man "Hey, anyone want to buy a wet blanket? We got a wet blanket for sale!"

Everyone in the market laugh at Stan's joke and at Dipper/Bill who didn't find the joke funny at all. Even though Toby Determined was selling actual wet blankets for almost $10. "I can't survive in this market..." The creepy old reporter moan.

Bill/Dipper took over and started laughing, "That's a good one, Fez. And for that you deserve a prize." he then pulls out a yellow rubber duck and place it into Stan's hand, "Ha! That's the best you can do kid? Give me a bath toy?!" Stan laughs and so did everyone else, until the ducky exploded with spiders crawling out of the yellow duck and all over Stan. "Have a duckling full of tarantulas."

Stan ran out screaming, as Everyone look at Bill/Dipper in shock. Bill/Dipper look at them, "What? You guys are just as guilty for mocking and teasing people like me harshly. I say it's a well deserve payback there fellas."

And so, everyone learn some important things that day. Don't make your jokes very bad that you'll end up getting Karma back at you. Don't mess with the quiet ones, for they bark and bite back harder. And most importantly of all...

Do not. Mock. Or tease. Bill/Dipper Cipher/Pines.

Time Skip

Stan's alarm went off as the old man walks into the bathroom, "Hah! Curse? Yeah, right." he then lets out a scream of fright, for seeing his reflection in the mirror, "Wait is this curse ugly, or normal ugly?" He squints at the mirror to see better details. Finding no curse on him what so ever, Stan confidently states "Looks like I got off scot-free."

He spoke too soon, cause once he brought his hands up to the mirror. They were gone. Like they were chop cleaned off, but with no blood only a purple and white glow at the wrist.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Skip to Breakfast

"Alright kiddos, breakfast time. Prepare your mouths for-" Stan's idea of hiding his missing hands failed, as the oven mitts fell off along with the frying pan with today's breakfast.

The Pines twins were shock as Mabel cried out the question they were thinking, "NO HANDS! GRUNKLE STAN! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HANDS?!" Stan shrugged his shoulders and answered "So I might have got cursed a little. But the watch looks nice, right?" Bill/Dipper then said "I did warn you, Fez. And look what happen."

The Witch appeared on the watch and demanded "Foolish man! Thieving hands find wicked face! You must return what isn't yours..." but she didn't get to finish her sentence because Stan uses his mouth to put the mitt back on to shut her up. "That's better."

Dipper/Bill couldn't believe his Grunkle, actually, yeah he can, got curse. "I told you, Grunkle Stan. You gotta give that watch back and apologize." But Stan denies it, "What? That old crone should apologize to me for denying my right to buy cheap junk. I don't need hands. I've got self-respect!"

He tries to prove it by picking up his morning cup of coffee, but drops it. He then slaps a fork to catapult a strip piece of bacon that lands on his face. "So, how's it working out?" Bill/Dipper ask, "Mabel, sweetie, will you make your uncle some hands?" Grunkle Stan admits defeat.

One pair of modified hands later, Stan now has a new pair of hands. Which were mostly pink party cups with flowers on them and forks as fingers. "Say hello to your new hands! In quotes." "Nice work, kid." Stan complemented Mabel's craft as he pats her head, only to get her hair tangled in the forks as he pulls some of her strands of hair, Stan turns to Dipper/Bill and said "Ya see? hands are overrated. I'm ready to take on the day."

Stan stands up and announces to the world, "I'm ready to take on the day." While Bill/Dipper proclaim "And I'm ready to see this fails."

That morning was a complete and utter train wreck. Stan scares Lazy Susan just by greeting her, their time at the Bowling Aly ended with Stan tripping Tyler Cutebiker with his bowling ball causing Baby doll biker to drop his bowling ball which went up into the TV screens and came crashing down nearly got a bystander seriously injured, and finally the Pines family were at the grocery store getting the items that they need.

Which resulted with Stan getting covered in egg yoks and sells by playing a game called, 'Toss me a dozen eggs' with Jimmy the employee. "Let's find that witch." said Stan, while Bill/Dipper smirk with confidents "Told ya it'll end in failure."

One hike to mountains soon to get lost and then found the location from a pamphlet Mabel took from the swap meet later. The pines and Bill found a cave up to the peek of the mountains. Dipper/Bill lead the way with his hands lit on blue flames, as Mabel recites what was on the pamphlet. "According to the Swap Meet pamphlet, the Hand Witch lives in a horrible Hand Witch lair, on Hand Witch Mountain." "Stop saying Hand Witch." Stan barks in complaint, for his wrist are tape with flashlights to provide back up light.

Not even five minutes inside the cave, Mabel felt something touch her shoulder, "Grunkle Stan, did you just tap my shoulder?" Stan shows her his state of no hands and shines a light at her face "Kid, I can't tap anything."

Dipper/Bill then felt a two taps on each side, he turns to his sister and Grunkle and said. "Guys, can you stop tapping both my shoulders?" 'Kid, there's a reason this is called 'Hand Witch Mountain.'

Neither of the Pines didn't need the answer, cause they already found out why. All around them were "Hands! Lots of hands!" Stan yells as he and Mabel tried to run. While Dipper/Bill got into a fighting position ready to take on the hands, 'Remember Pine-Tree, like we practice.' Dipper/Bill shot blue fire from his fist at the fist hand and starts to shoot out more sneaking up behind him.

But as those hands fall down, more keeps popping up. Stan was push into a corner and kept getting slapped in the face, while Mabel was losing in a rock, paper, scissors battle. Dipper/Bill tried to form a ring of fire around them but felt his stamina draining him, it wasn't long until they hear the cackle of the person they were looking for. The Hand Witch.

"Look at this... touching scene! Up top!" One of the hands on the walls of the cave gave her a hi-five, "You guys... you guys get me." They do, what good companions to an old lonely witch. "Alright, you horrible wench. You got me. Stealing is wrong, et cetera." said Stan as he shakes the watch off of his wrist and push it towards to the woman. "Take it. Now can I have my hands back now? I have a certain gesture I'd like to share with you."

'Oh I can imagen what it is.' Bill/Dipper thought. The Hand Witch thought otherwise, "Alas, your hands cannot be gotten so easily. The spirits say..." She pauses for a moment as she puts the watch in a place where most ladies would put their things in. between their boobs. If the Hand Witch even has them. "That the curse can only be broken, by a kissss…"

"What?!" Everyone cried out in confusing alarm. Stan sighed and said "It's alright, kids. Just look away. Dipper if you would?" Dipper/Bill snaps his fingers and the flames disappeared.

Stan walks over to the witch and kisses her hand, but she then points to her face and screams "A KISS ON THE LIIIIPPSS!" Stan recoil in disgust, "What! Forget it! I'm not kissing any of that mess! I don't need my hands that bad!"

Dipper shouted "Yeah, you're just making stuff up!" Stan turns to his grandniece and grandnephew as he starts to walk away he said "Let's go kids." The Hand Witch gets off of her hand throne crying out to the to stop, "NO, WAIT DON'T GO! Ehh- you're right, you're right. I-I-I was just making all of that stuff up. I-I was just trying to get something going, you know? It's so hard to meet people these days..."

She then snaps her fingers to let the hands to withdraw from their attacks, while three hands started to braid Mabel's hair. Seeing how they are not a threat anymore, Bill/Dipper said in a confusing tone of voce, "So this is just a ploy to get a date?"

"I'M DESPERATE, OKAY?" The Hand Witch exploded, "But every time I bring someone back here without keeping their hands hostage, they just run away." "Well, yeah, look at this horror show!" Stan point around the cave and stated that it's way more creepier than a cave.

That's when Mabel gets an idea, "You just need to redecorate! For example: " rearrange the hands together to make "A Handalabra!" Mabel announces, as hands crawled over her body and face.

This pleases the Hand Witch, that the Pines, and Bill, spent a full eight hours on redecorating the cave into a nice cozy home fit for sweet old lady to live in. And it was enough to get Stan's hands back.

After waving good-bye to the Hand Witch, the Pines, and Bill, made their way back down the mountains to go home, "Well, I learn nothing." Said Stan, "By the way, Dipper. When did you get so good at fighting back there?"

Dipper/Bill replied "Well, when I'm asleep. I'm in between the dreamscape and the mindscape. Bill's been training me how to use his powers. But those were just the basics, Bill says I need to master a few more until we can move on to the harder ones." Stan and Mabel started at him bewildered at this news. Dipper Pines. The nerdy twin. Is learning to do magic from a dream demon. And was getting good at it.

"That's amazing, bro-bro." "I could use this." Mabel and Stan replied, Bill/Dipper then said "Don't even think about using me as part of your mystery shake tour display, Fez. Unless you want the whole place to go up in flames." Stan let that statement sink in before saying, "That idea's out of the window and into a hole that will be buried forever."

Mabel laughed a little, but couldn't help but feel bad that her brother is now learning magic that could be also dark magic and that he and Bill will have a much harder time to be unfused.

Well tomorrow will be a new day, to try and relax, have fun, and find some more ideas or clues to how to get Dipper and Bill separated without having both of them killed. Or help gain Bill's missing memories.

'I have a positive feeling that something good is going to happen tomorrow'. Mabel thought.


So that's it. Hope all of you like it! I know it's a short chapter, because it was a three short part episode.

See you guys later and stay healthy okay?