This chapter contains references to self-harm, sexual content, and language.

I am beautiful with you
Even in the darkest part of me
I am beautiful with you
Make it feel the way it's supposed to be
You're here with me
You show me this and I'll believe
I am beautiful with you
You want me for myself
You get me like no one else
I am beautiful with you...

Scent hit her first. Darcy knew it, of course, it was familiar, but from where? Her brain was sludge, and trying to remember or think hurt. She could move a little, though she wasn't even sure if she had legs and arms anymore. Everything felt as heavy as cement, but whatever she was laying on was comfortable. Soft, high-quality, expensive.

Oh, fuck. Last night the eggnog and the champagne had seemed like such a good idea, and she hadn't felt anything past that joyous alcohol buzz. Now it all had seemed to come at her at once, a wave of nausea hitting her like bricks. She didn't even want to open her eyes, certain that when she did only hellfire and brimstone would greet her.

Back to the smell, then. It was soothing, woodsy...other-worldly, if she had to describe it. Cedar, maybe, and sage- with each gulp of it she felt her head clear a little more, warmth running through the limbs that, it turned out, she did still have. She was able to stretch out, not even reaching any edges or corners. The bed was overlarge, as though it were intended for a person taller than most.

But where was she? Not home, that was for damn sure- not only could she not hear Mrs. Fasser screeching at her eight cats on the floor above her, but her bed in her apartment was nowhere near as heavenly as this. The thread count on these sheets alone made them worth more than anything she owned.

Such luxury could only belong to one person- Loki.

Then she recalled it all, their amazing evening (despite Thor and Loki's cheap and pathetic attempts at cheating at Scrabble), Thor's declaration that he was going to try to keep Loki on earth, the feeling of family and home and Christmas that had been so lacking the last few years...the snowball fight earlier yesterday had been nothing short of a blast, and then so picture-perfect at the end, Loki pulling her into his arms, almost kissing her! It was out there in the snow, goofing around like kids, that Darcy had really seen him let his hair down in a way that didn't end with mass destruction.

There was a soft knock on the door. She groaned, and heard the door slowly open.

"Now here is a pretty picture." Loki drawled dryly, and Darcy opened one eye, groaning again as she reached blindly for a pillow to smother herself with. Even Loki's velvet voice sent her head pounding.

"Come on, then. Getting up and moving will do you some good." Loki yanked the blankets away from her, and she squeezed her eyes shut, refusing to look at him.

"Are you going to behave like this all day? I was rather hoping our time could be better spent."

"UGH." Darcy pulled herself up so she was sitting- hunched like a deformed witch it was true, but sitting all the same- and shaded her eyes, as though she were staring into the sun. It was then she realized she was wearing the outfit she always kept stashed at Thor and Jane's- a pair of comfortable sweats and a loose-fitting Red Sox shirt.

"You...?" Darcy managed to ask, her voice hoarse and scratchy. Her brain might not have been working at a hundred percent, but she knew that for her to be in these clothes, somebody had to have taken her out of her other ones. Since she didn't remember it happening, it must've been after she had fallen asleep (blacked out sounded much too pathetic). There was no way the world was cruel enough that she was zonked while Loki took her clothes off...

Loki hurriedly shook his head. "Jane. After a few short hours of sleep she seemed to be just fine and came to help."

"I forgot how easily Jane bounces back from booze. Totally unfair." Darcy realized then that she must have been out most of the morning, that her hair was a goddamn a mess and her breath was probably even worse.

"Uh-" She began, but Loki talked over her.

"The shower is prepared for you, if you would like to use it. I do not think it wise to send you home on your own until you have somewhat recovered. However deplorable the option is, you can always stay here, with me, until you are better. Unless you would rather go to Thor and Jane's?"

Darcy rolled her eyes, then winced; her beloved go-to response brought enough pain pounding through her head to make her stomach roll.

"I shall take that," Loki extended a hand, indicating that she should stand, "as a "no, I of course prefer you," and a "thank you, O Wise One, you truly have surpassed yourself in hospitality, selflessness, and chivalry"." His smirk was as snarky and enchanting as ever.

Darcy laughed, despite the ache that pulsed through her body, and reached out for him. He gently pulled her from the bed and led her down the dimly lit hallway. She'd never been in this part of his apartment though she'd spent ample time here, and despite her urge to upchuck, she looked around with curiosity as Loki opened the bathroom door and flipped on the lights.

Now that she was up and moving she could keep her eyes open without wishing she were dead. The bathroom was the same size as Thor and Jane's, though much neater and darker. The vanity was black marble, and the shower was long with a frosted glass door, certainly large enough, Darcy made sure to note, for two. She avoided looking in the large hexagonal mirror above the sink and instead focused on a panel with several knobs and buttons just beside the shower door.

"It doubles as a steam room." Loki said, noticing her gaze. He pressed a button and spun the first knob, and Darcy saw steam filling the shower from the marbled walls. "This one," he pressed the second button and turned another knob, "is for aromatherapy. Different scents for different ailments." Darcy now noticed small icons on the knob settings, a purple sprig of lavender, a eucalyptus leaf, a curl of orange peel...

"Fancy shmancy. You ever use it?" Oh bad train of thought...now all she could picture was a naked, sweaty Loki surrounded by sweet smelling steam...

Loki nodded. "Occasionally. It is rather stressful, after all, to be stuck in a room with you and Jane day in and out." But his voice had that teasing edge to it that she had come to realize he usually reserved just for her, and if she weren't afraid of looking like a feral beast, she would've smiled widely back at him.

"Jane brought over a few of your...effects," Loki gestured towards a large, hot pink makeup bag on the counter and Darcy could've bounded over to kiss Jane. It was her emergency bag, kept under Jane and Thor's bathroom sink for when she spent the night there or forgot something in her rush to get to work on time. Inside the bag, among other things, was a travel toothbrush and cinnamon toothpaste, deodorant, a brush and scrunchi, and a few random bits of makeup.

"I do have some breakfast in the oven...and you will," Loki narrowed his eyes at Darcy, "eat it. No arguments, no tantrums, yes?"

Eating would definitely help, even if she did have to choke it down and drink a whole bottle of Pepto afterwards. And anyway, how could she complain? A luxury shower, a meal hot and ready for her, a day with Loki...hungover or not, things couldn't have been better.

"No promises!" Darcy called to the back of Loki's head as he turned to leave. He ignored her, but she could see his half-smirk in the mirror as he passed it.

oooo

Darcy let the hot water pound against her back and shoulders for a few minutes before she reached for the nearest bottle. It was dark green glass, heavy, and smelled absolutely heavenly. It was, she realized with a jolt, the scent that had been on Loki's sheets. She wasn't sure where it was from or what was in it, as all the words were in some foreign language she'd never seen before. She poured a liberal amount in her palm, savoring the aroma, enjoying the pleasant trickle through her veins with each breath she inhaled. It was Loki's smell, that's why she had recognized it, but hadn't been able to place it in her fuzzy state of mind.

Darcy felt much better now, more invigorated, though her stomach still churned. It was tolerable though, and she gave herself a final rinse and stepped out of the shower, toweling off and once again wondering just how much Tony Stark spent on linens. She redressed and combed her hair out, feeling more human. She took a long time brushing her teeth, and opted against any makeup. After all, Loki had already seen her looking like she'd spent the night fighting off rabid racoons in a garbage dump, so what was the point in trying to hide the circles under her eyes or her pale pallor now?

Darcy left the bathroom and went into the living room, where all the blinds were drawn, and only two lamps were switched on. The track lighting in the kitchen was dimmed, and Loki was just putting two plates down on the table when she walked over and pulled out a chair for herself.

"Welcome back to the land of the living," he said, glancing over her. Indeed Darcy did look much better, but then a hot shower always did seem to help him when he was feeling less than fresh. Once she had eaten she would have more energy, and her alcohol-induced stupor would vanish, or at least lessen.

"Ha ha..." She picked up her fork, looking at her plate doubtfully. Loki had made fried potatoes and scrambled eggs, something she usually enjoyed. True the smell of food wasn't making her gag, which was an improvement, but she could feel bile rising in her throat at the idea of trying to chew.

"The starch will be good for you. Just swallow, and try not to think about it." Loki advised.

Darcy lifted some eggs onto the fork and closed her eyes, trying to decide what not to think about- their fluffy texture, or the way Loki had said "swallow".

oooo

There was no doubt about it, Darcy was dying. Sure the food stayed down, had even tasted good, as all of Loki's meals did. There was, though, a jackhammer beating ceaselessly into the side of her head. Her shoulders were tight, tensed, her neck probably one giant knot by now.

Loki plied her with water and aspirin from a bottle Jane had thoughtfully left, and insisted she lay on the couch and browse through the extensive list of channels on the television he never watched unless she was there with him.

"I can't believe Jane tried to kill me. I'm like, her whole world, you know? I mean, does she think she'd be where she is today if it weren't for me? What kind of person poisons their reason for living?"

"Oh yes, I do recall a gun pointed to your head as you sloshed down every ounce of alcohol you could get your hands on."

"I think you're just being a sore loser. You're bitter you couldn't hack it at a human game. It's okay Loki, nobody is judging you. Scrabble is for the big dogs, you know?" Darcy rolled onto her side, blinking at him. It was a testament to how they matched each other's snark that she could even form semi-decent insults to hurl at him in her state. Plus, there was no way she was ever, in her entire life, going to let Loki live down losing Scrabble. Sure, okay, technically she had lost, too, and to Thor no less, but if there was one thing Darcy didn't do, it was get hung up on technicalities. Jane would stick to her story anyway- that the two of them totes took out the alien bros. Who would ever believe Thor and Loki over them?

"Since you insist on throwing your misery in my face...sit." Loki gestured to the floor in front of him. Darcy's eyebrows lifted in surprise, not sure what he was implying.

"What?"

Loki rolled his eyes. "I am a kind, charitable soul, Darcy. To see such a pathetic creature in pain stands against my very core."

It was Darcy's turn to roll her eyes, and Loki shrugged. "Often, getting the blood moving helps. Perhaps a light massage will assist in that."

"From you?" She squeaked. Sure Loki played with her hair and held her close at times, but this was completely different and should she what, take her shirt off? Oh god, he'd see her bra! She wasn't even wearing her sexy one, with the lace straps and-

"A rhetorical question, yes? As we are quite alone." Loki interrupted her thoughts.

Darcy visibly swallowed, but slid down on the floor in front of him, leaning back against Loki's legs.

He gently lifted her hair, plying it to one side, over her shoulder. She bit her lip and tried not to moan as his long, nimble fingers brushed against her skin. He pressed into her muscles, moving his thumbs in long, sweeping motions down her neck. Darcy tipped her head slightly back against his knees, her lips now mashed together as she tried to suppress any sounds of pleasure. She didn't need Loki to know that she was so desperate, so easy (where he was concerned), that a simple, thoughtful neck massage could turn her on so much.

And then, just like that, her resolve shattered and she started to laugh. Laugh at the situation, at what had happened the night before, at what was happening now.

"What is so funny?" Loki demanded, his hands unmoving.

"I was just thinking...I mean, look at you! You're totally taking care of me. Won't your bad boy image take a major hit? Pampering a Midgardian girl and all?"

"I am positively domestic at this point...why not indulge a little more?"

"You say that like I'm the one doing you a solid."

Darcy once more laid her head back against Loki, her eyes fluttering peacefully shut as he resumed rubbing her shoulders. This went on for several minutes, Loki's ministrations reaching farther down her chest, brushing under the collar of her tee shirt.

"This is...quite in the way." Much to Darcy's surprise, Loki's voice was breathy, as though he were having a hard time maintaining himself. He tugged lightly on the sleeve of her shirt, and in one swift movement, her body reacting long before her brain, she pulled the it off and tossed it on the floor beside her. Except for her thin bra, she was now naked from the waist up. Normally she would be mortified- yeah she was fine to walk around in various states of undress in her own apartment, but with a guy, at his place? A guy she was totes gaga for?

"Darcy...do try to relax." Loki said after a thick swallow. Darcy let out a slow, steady breath and nodded. It was Loki. He had seen her at her absolute worst...her most freaked out, completely piss blind drunk, immaturely jealous...a faded bra and a few stretch marks wouldn't faze him now.

oooo

The words were out of his mouth before he could comprehend what he was saying, and then Darcy, understanding and obeying instantly, had been there, before him, practically topless. Loki had seen women nude before, of course, he had been with women, had brought them pleasure and been pleasured himself in the process. It was not anything foreign to him, and yet each new experience with Darcy was like the first time all over again, and he may as well be an inexperienced, hormone-riddled youth for all the control he could muster.

Sweat was beading on his brow, he could feel it. He only hoped that Darcy was unaware of just how much she was affecting him- he would do verywell to keep her against his knees and not make her aware of the precarious situation between his legs. He was sure she would be utterly (and rightly) mortified at the arousal she would feel there, the arousal that was caused by her silken skin beneath his fingertips, by the thick, plush tresses of her hair, by the way she kept wheedling her bottom lip between her teeth, as though to keep herself from crying out.

Loki's hands drifted below her collar bones; he could not help himself. Surely this was understandable, even forgivable. There could be no being in the entire cosmos that could withstand the temptation that was before him now; the firm swell of Darcy's alabaster bust mere centimeters from contact. He could easily, all too easily, imagine slipping his hand down into the cup of her bra, of stroking, gently of course, the supple warmth he found there. Loki's mouth began to salivate just thinking about it. He yearned to know the exact texture of each square inch of her chest; her nipple, how it would stiffen under his ministrations, to memorize its exact rosebud color, and to all the gods, would he dare to hope? To taste it, to press his tongue there, against that pert peak...her breathtakingly beautiful breasts held, heavy in his hands, each receiving the lavish attention they so deserved...

This was not a good train of thought, at all, if he wished to conceal his physical impulses just now. Surely there would be opportunity later, farther down the road (though not too far one would hope), when he was more sure of his place here on Midgard, within SHIELD; when there could be a chance at something more than a quick roll on the floor of his apartment.

Darcy meant more to him than that, and if, Valhalla willing, he was ever able to act on these ardent desires, it would be in a much more planned out, worthwhile and passionate way. He wanted to, and ought to, he reflected with some sense of amusing self-deprecation, at least kiss the girl before he tried to bed her.

"I daresay you'll find it leaves something to be desired," Loki said, after clearing his throat and dropping his hands from her, "but I hope your, er, circulation is improved at least." He hesitated for half a second before handing her the discarded shirt, much preferring her to walk around in however little clothing she desired, but his chivalry forced him to hand the garment to her.

Darcy gave a sharp intake of breath and licked her lips, a motion Loki hurriedly averted his eyes from, lest the situation in his pants become impossible for Darcy to ignore, and slipped it over her head, pulling it over her torso.

"Much better, thank you. Really. For everything." Darcy turned and looked up at him, giving him a sweet smile.

"As for the rest of the day-"

"Not to worry, I have that covered. Luckily for you, uncultured swine that you are, I brought these over ages ago." Darcy stood and walked over to the entertainment center, slid back one of the glass doors on it, and pulled out a case bound in what looked to be green leather. She flipped it open, revealing four discs inside, and fiddled with the TV for a moment, pushing the disc into the player.

"Buckle up. Extended is the only way to go. There will be no stupid questions, and snack breaks are the only permissible reason to pause." Darcy grabbed the remote, then sat back on the couch, unabashedly snuggling into Loki.

He inclined his head in understanding, and Darcy hit the play button, all black and an eerie, ethereal voice filling the screen.

oooo

"What contrived, trite nonsense." Loki sneered, as the screen darkened and the credits began to roll. Granted there had been parts of the film that were quite interesting, and Loki had to hand it to earth cinematics- the battle sequences were very engaging, and the acting had been top notch. He had not even minded the length of it all- how could he when Darcy was pressed up against him, so serene and comfortable?

"Are you even speaking these words to me right now?!" Darcy cried, outraged. How very dare he! Every single second on that screen had been pure magic! It was perfect! If only all films, fantasy or not, could reach to such a high caliber!

"All of this power, all of this might, in a mere ring? A piece of jewelry? Honestly," Loki said condescendingly, "how unrealistic and foolish."

"Oh really," Darcy replied hotly, her eyes reduced to slits, her arms folded across her chest.

"Quite." Loki beamed at her, secretly thrilled at her reaction. Of course it was very believable, and he'd seen things in other realms far more unimaginable. Darcy just had that very attractive glint in her eye when he disagreed with her about things she adored...

"It's no more unrealistic than, say, a magical scepter? What about Tony's reactor, hm?"

"Both objects that exist in the realm of reality, my dearest Darcy, not that of fiction. Which is another reason why it is so-"

"Oh, you can just shut that mouth of yours thankyouverymuch!" Darcy screeched, not believing her ears. Loki was a boundary crosser for sure, and usually, Darcy didn't mind it, in fact, she got some amusement out of it, particularly when he was going toe-to-toe with Jane or Thor, but this? This was betrayal, in the simplest of terms.

"Or?" Loki challenged, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Or," Darcy seethed, "I'll make you."

Loki's eyes seemed to blaze at her words, and Darcy bit back her lip, realizing what she had just said. The temperature of the room seemed to soar, the sexual tension thickening, pressing up against her skin.

"Is that so?" Loki drawled slowly, his voice like silk. She couldn't tell if he was making fun of her or not, but he definitely seemed to be enjoying watching her squirm.

"Well, I'm not some miracle worker..." Darcy said dismissively. She was so ready and so not ready for this at the same time...they'd been skirting true physical intimacy since, in her opinion, that day in the elevator that seemed almost a lifetime ago. She had a feeling, though, that when the moment presented itself (and it was most definitely when, not if, because the only other alternative was for her to friggen die) it would be in a much more extravagant setting. Loki was definitely that sort, as her Christmas present proved. Besides, she knew that when it finally happened, when they kissed for the first time and perhaps even did more, it would be well worth the wait.

Loki pursed his lips together, but didn't say anything more while Darcy reached for the remote and pulled up the disc menu.

oooo

Darcy stayed for two days in Loki's apartment, enjoying every second of it. She was fit as a fiddle again by the end of the first day, but she had no real desire to leave, and Loki himself said it was just as much bother for two as for one, so she may as well stay for another day, just to be sure she was truly well.

Loki cooked for them both, and Darcy washed her clothes in his washer/dryer combo. They sat up late, watching whatever movies Darcy fancied, and afterward they would talk, though Loki scarcely willingly mentioned anything about himself. Darcy had to pull things out of him, but was rewarded for her efforts. Loki shared memories of Asgard as a child, the way his mother used to fix him bread dipped in sweet wine and sing him songs she'd learned from her grandmother when he was upset, how Thor always came in first in their childhood games where strength was concerned, but none of their playmates could match Loki's ability at strategy.

In turn, Darcy recounted her better days of college, all of which seemed to include Jane in some capacity or other, and she even brought a few smiles and quick chuckles out of Loki when she told him about finding (and nearly flattening him) and tasing Thor in the desert.

Both nights Darcy fell asleep next to Loki on the couch, curled up against him, and both mornings she woke up in his bed, comfortable and rested. She was definitely going to be bugging Tony to get her whatever mattress and bedding he gave to those who lived in the building- it might even be worth it to give in to Fury's demands that every employee take up residence here just for the sheets. She wasn't complaining about the heated bathroom floors, either.

Jane and Thor joined them for lunch on the second day, Jane bringing Chinese takeout and two bottles of sparkling cider. Jane said that Maria had dismissed everyone until after the New Year, since all productivity had seemed to cease in light of the holidays. Tony had all-but kidnapped Pepper and they were rumored to be hiding on a private island somewhere in the Caribbean. Sam and Steve were backpacking in Brazil with some buddies of Sam's from his military days. Nobody had heard from Nat, Clint, or Bruce. Fury had disappeared from the building, and Coulson phoned in orders, though nobody knew where he was, either. Darcy threw a triumphant fist in the air, glad to have a few days of leisure left.

Loki gave her a sidelong glance, but she was high fiving Thor, who declared that he wasn't leaving Jane's side unless a cataclysmic event forced him to, and didn't notice.

Jane, however, saw Loki's longing look, and saw precisely what was budding between her soon-to-be brother-in-law and Darcy, who she considered to be her own sister. Oddly, this didn't worry her. Or rather, it didn't worry her as much as it should have. Loki had shown a capacity for change and even if Darcy was the only person he was truly nice to or concerned about, it gave her hope for his future. She would watch them closely, she decided, but so far Darcy had spent vast amounts of time alone with Loki and came through unscathed- actually, now that she thought about it, Darcy was happier than Jane had ever seen her.

It was high time for some serious girl talk. Darcy was familiar with pretty much every aspect of her and Thor's relationship, probably uncomfortably so. While she didn't expect Darcy to spill all of what happened between her and Loki, Jane had a feeling that Darcy would want to talk to somebody about it, and who better to understand what it was like to care about someone from another realm?

Jane and Thor had both wondered how long this thing between Darcy and Loki had been going on, and Jane had speculated that it had started to blossom after Loki had witnessed Darcy's first panic attack. It was weird how these things could start. Loki, an outcast, a fugitive , falling for the lab assistant...Then again, hitting your soulmate with a bus in the middle of the desert wasn't exactly meet-cute, so who was she to judge?

"So, what's the haps? Anything new on the Avenging front?" Darcy asked, noticing that Loki's supply of ham fried rice was low, and taking it upon herself to scoop some more onto his plate.

While Thor regaled them with Tony's latest hair-brained lab catastrophe and Fury's, well, fury, Jane watched as Loki and Darcy doted on each other like an old married couple. If Darcy's dumplings got cold, Loki would stand from the table and heat them up in the microwave. When Darcy saw that there was only a few pieces of Loki's favorite orange chicken left, she took none for herself but handed him the box with a small smile. Loki poured out Darcy's drink first, and after the leftovers had been put in the fridge and Jane passed around the doughnuts they'd brought as dessert, Darcy picked out the only raspberry filled one and gave it to Loki before anybody else had a chance to look over the choices of the box.

"He doesn't like chocolate," Darcy said with a shrug, when she noticed Jane watching them over the now-empty box (Thor had taken nine for himself).

Jane had promised Maria to look over some last minute equations she'd texted her, so after the doughnuts she and Thor said goodbye and went back to their apartment.

"Okay, I'm dying to talk about what just happened in there." Jane said, the instant their door had shut behind them.

Thor nodded, a grim look on his face. "I too need to discuss it. It should not irritate me so, but after all, it was quite inconsiderate. I expect it from Loki of course, but not Darcy."

Jane gave him an odd look. "Really? I thought it was kind of cute. A nice change, actually."

Thor's face scrunched up. "A nice change from what? I only wish for it to never happen again. I do not think I can hold my tongue next time."

"Thor, what are you talking about?!" Jane cried, sure that if anybody should have been pleased about Loki's behavior, it would be Thor.

"Darcy taking the jelly doughnut, of course. How could she not know that they are my favorite? I mean," he stuck his lip out pathetically, "I picked that one special from the case. You were there! You remember. It was the last one in the whole shop!"

Jane shook her head, but couldn't stop the smile that spread over her face. "You're lucky you're so cute." She kissed his cheek, running her hand down his arm and squeezing their palms together. "But I was actually talking about Loki, and the way he kept looking at Darce."

Thor's face cleared. "Yes, of course. Was it not blatantly obvious how careful with Darcy he was being? As if he saw nobody else."

Jane nodded. "Precisely. I half expected them to start feeding each other! I can't decide if they're an old married couple or love sick puppies."

"And yet," Thor tipped his head thoughtfully to the side, "did it not seem as though they were both holding back? As if they have not yet crossed some important threshold."

"I'd like to think that Darcy would've told me if they had kissed or anything, you know...more."

Thor wrinkled his nose. "Best to not think of that. Although I will say this for Loki, I have never seen him behave in such a way with a woman. With anyone for that matter."

"Did he...date a lot in Asgard?" Jane wasn't totally sure she wanted to know about the brothers' exploits before Thor had come to earth, but it was apparent that Darcy was something very special to Loki.

"He always said Asgardian women did not interest him. There were few that were worth the effort, it is true, and it seemed that the ones who were, ended up being better friends than lovers. Our mother always said that it would take somebody very unique to unlock Loki's heart."

"Well, I think she's right. There's nobody like Darcy anywhere, in the entire universe."

"Loki is much the same. At his heart, my brother is a warrior. In a different way than I, perhaps, but mighty just the same." Thor mused, staring out into the living room. "You have heard tell of knights, yes?" He asked Jane, who nodded. She had taken medieval studies in college, and had always found that time period fascinating.

"That is the closest explanation I can give of Loki. Though he has done horrific deeds, once he has a true cause, he is honorable and very protective. That he gets from our mother. She is quite the woman, you know. One day I hope for you to meet her." Thor entwined his fingers with Jane's.

"So what you're saying is that Loki has a purpose now." Jane said, and Thor nodded. "Darcy has woken something in him, something I feared was gone forever. But now..."

"Now there's hope." Jane finished for him. Thor nodded, then leaned over to deeply kiss her, driving Maria's request from both their minds.

oooo

Darcy was not thrilled to be back home.

She had built up her apartment to reflect everything she loved- bright colors, lots of cool posters of indie films, play bills from the Broadway shows she'd been to, an old record player and a huge stack of vinyls, area rugs in different geometric designs scattered everywhere. Every inch of her albeit small abode screamed DARCY FRIGGEN LEWIS LIVES HERE.

But now, all she saw was how empty it was. There was no fresh fruit in the fridge, no french toast sizzling on the stove top, no snide banter or warm body to cuddle up to. For the first time in her life, Darcy hated living alone.

No, no, that wasn't it. She didn't want to bunk with just anybody. She couldn't spend that much one-on-one time with Jane, and if she had to live with any of the other people she knew- well, it'd be a disaster.

"Other" being the operative word. People other than Loki, that was. The last two days had been some kind of dream- not that living with Loki would always be that way, of course. They both liked to argue, were sure they were always right, and Loki, while accommodating, wasn't all that fond of Darcy's taste in music and TV. He was an early-riser, a morning person- she could sleep til noon if given the chance and her juices never got properly flowing until at least that late. They both took ridiculously long showers, and while Loki was more considerate that she was, he still wasn't quiet as he moved around the apartment while she laid in bed.

That all sounded pretty damn good to Darcy. She'd take it, any day. She wondered if Loki felt that way, too...he did seem genuinely disappointed that she had to go. Of course, maybe he was just lonely, and she was the closest thing he had to a friend that wasn't his brother. Still, she wasn't a fool. She'd snatch that opportunity up!

It had been nearly nightfall when Darcy had been deposited at her building by a SHIELD driver, and she stood forlornly in her kitchen, rummaging through her empty fridge, searching for something to eat while she made a mental list of what she had to get done tomorrow.

Though Maria had granted the rest of SHEILD, or so it seemed, a vacay, Jane had suggested that the day after tomorrow they meet in the lab to catch up on some neglected paperwork and other administrative crap that Darcy would rather die than do over the holidays, but duty before pleasure, she supposed, and anyway she would see Loki and that seemed to make any day more bearable.

In frustration, Darcy slammed the fridge door shut and sulked to the bedroom, where the bed lay unmade, clothes all over the floor. Tomorrow would be a chore day, that was for sure. Laundry, going to the market, cleaning the whole apartment...certainly not her idea of a day off, but adulthood was a bitch and she'd gotten used to having such tidy surroundings at Loki's, at having decent food always within reach.

Maybe, Darcy mused, as she began to pick up the laundry and toss it into the hamper, she could, one day, show Loki her place. He would, if nothing else, get a kick of out its eclectic appearance. Though her bed wasn't nearly as comfortable as his...Darcy shivered at the idea of sharing a bed with Loki. She'd been sure he would have slept beside her the last two evenings. After all, he went through the trouble of carrying her into his bed when he could have very easily tossed a blanket over her and left her on the sofa. It must have come down to his chivalry. Or maybe he thought it'd be crossing a line to sleep beside her? She'd tried like hell to show that nope, she didn't have lines when it came to him.

After tidying her room Darcy went back into the kitchen, pulling out one of the only things she had the ingredients for, a box of mac n cheese. After making, eating, and cleaning up her pathetic dinner, the rest of her night passed in solitary silence, and even when she blasted some music while she was in the shower, she still felt a deep sense of loneliness.

Chiding herself, Darcy got into bed. She was a grown ass woman, a woman who was lacking a firm declaration from Loki of his feelings and/or intentions towards her. So it wasn't even like she was girlfriend, and yeah he'd been the one to insist she stay with him, but she had no right to miss his apartment, to miss "living" with him, as she had done the last two days.

Loki was probably grateful for the break, anyway, she decided, plugging her phone in to charge and rolling over onto her side. Yeah he'd always been welcoming, always made room for her, but it was probably a lot for him to take in...not many people (including herself) could handle 24/7 Darcy Lewis.

A shame, she thought, yawning widely, already drifting off to sleep, but understandable. Yep, totes understandable.

oooo

Loki did not favor this, not one bit. It was rather desperate, he was sure, but his entire apartment lacked a very distinctive glow now that Darcy had departed, and he had to admit, for the very first time since being on this planet, that he was lonely. Well, now, that wasn't entirely it; not just anybody's company would do. Thor was of course family, though when Loki got into a certain mood, he was quite content not to see or speak to the overbearing brute for as long as possible. Darcy, however...Darcy he wanted by his side no matter his state of mind, no matter his frustrations.

Loki bustled around, scrubbing, vacuuming, dusting, his usual evening routine, and he could not help but wish he had finally given in to Darcy and Thor's admonitions that he obtain a mobile phone so that he could hear her voice, or perhaps even exchange lines with her (text, he was sure it was called). Then again he doubted very much that Nick Fury would allow this, no matter if Thor himself asked for it; communication with the outside world was very limited to the inside of Jane's lab.

He had been on the verge of asking Darcy to stay for yet another day, and possibly another after that. Jane had decided during their lunch that they should put in, at least, a few hours of work, and a day had been picked. It would have been very easy for Darcy to continue to reside there, in his own apartment, until that day arrived. Surely some minion or other of SHIELD's could be dispatched to fetch her some more clothes or anything else she needed.

And then, of course, he worried that he would be forcing her to do something she did not want to. Then again, Darcy never had a problem voicing her opinions and desires, so if she did indeed want to stay, she would have asked to. He waited the whole day for her request, was even close to prodding her in that direction once or twice, but it never came. He accepted this; perhaps Darcy missed her home, or perhaps she was just tired of his constant presence.

As to the latter, he certainly could not blame her.

oooo

Darcy shot up, covered in sweat, a dull ache between her legs, vivid images still burned in her mind. She almost wanted to cry at the realization that everything that had happened- that Loki had done to her, that she had done to him- was only a dream.

She licked her lips, swearing she could taste the sweet tang of the dripping peach that she'd held in her hand. Darcy's fingers went to her neck, as though she could actually feel the heat of Loki's lips there, at her pulse, at the hollow of her throat. Everything had felt so blessedly real, so solid, just like the night around the burned out campfire...

Did that mean that Loki really had been here? She took a deep breath, shaking her head. No, no...there were differences, major ones, like the venue, for one...she and Loki had definitely not been going at it on her cramped bed, nor had she been wearing pajamas with kittens on them. If anything, it seemed almost like a page out of an erotic novel, with the peach nectar sliding in rivulets down her arm, and the delicate gold and silver macrame outfit she'd been wearing that covered very little...the large, circular bed with silk sheets that felt heavenly on her bare legs and back. The last time she hadn't even been asleep, though she figured afterwards that must've been what was happening. This time, it was clear, she had definitely been dreaming.

Darcy tried to picture the room in her mind's eye- a room of marble, with large tiles of it cut in impossibly precise and swirling patterns. The ceiling was painted with art she'd never seen before, jewel-like constellations (probably they really had been made of jewels, Darcy thought) and figures of such beauty that they must have been gods and goddesses...in the middle of the room a fire burned dimly in a grandly carved fireplace...not that she and Loki were lacking any warmth. And Loki, Loki above her, dressed in what must be his finest Asgardian wear, with eyes hungry, drinking her greedily in...

It was a little strange, she thought, because if she were going to dream about her and Loki, it wouldn't be in such a magnificent, grandiose setting. She would be in something more comfortable- a tank top and a cute pair of underwear, probably- and they would be in his apartment.

No, if anything, that would strike her as Loki's fantasy, not hers.

Whoa, what?! Loki's...well, it all fit, didn't it? The intricacy of it all, the lavishness of everything. It was exactly how she could see Loki picturing an intimate, steamy evening with a woman. And the woman had been her!

Did this mean that, as had happened last time, and Loki had said she'd been thinking about him, that he had been thinking about her? At Area 86 something had happened, possibly a connection had been made between them because of his magic, or simply because of whatever was going on with that whole whacked out place. Well, there was certainly a connection between them now, the past two days had proved that...was it strong enough to allow her to see into his mind? If so...

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

oooo

At first, it had been a technique he used to clear his mind. It had been something he had read in one of the many books Thor often brought him, and he had little else to do at night, when sleep seemed almost impossible. It was simple, really, and often it did help him. These imaginary scenarios he created had, of late, included Darcy, but certainly never to the explicit extent that this particular one had led to.

Yet Loki had a very hard time feeling any guilt over it. Darcy brought out so many things inside of him, and carnal lust happened to be one of them. He simply could not help it, and ever since he had given her that massage, she had been driving him into delicious madness. She was not doing it intentionally, of course (or so he supposed). Darcy may not have believed it, but she was, to him any way, the very meaning of seduction. It was not all physical, of course. He was as drawn to her soft curves as he was her laugh, her passion for the things she enjoyed, her loyalty to those who were lucky enough to be called her friends.

Occasionally he would recall Asgard, and his favorite things about it. His mother, of course, his favorite haunts, the feasts and mead, the freedom to use his magic to whatever ends he desired. His old quarters had popped into his mind, and he thought just how picturesque Darcy would look, spread there on his bed. After that, the reverie had taken on a mind of its own. Darcy's long, dark hair lay in sheets across her shoulders, a revealing, elaborately designed outfit of gold and silver webs taut against her creamy skin that glowed milky-white in the firelight.

She beckoned him with merely a look, and as he approached her he saw that she had taken a ripened, fragrant peach from the bowl on his bedside table, and had sunk her teeth into it. The juice from the lush fruit stuck to her lips, dripped down her neck, onto her ample breasts, seeped into the glistening cords.

He was on the bed, his lips on hers before he could form any coherent sense of the situation. The nectar from the peach was sweet and sticky, and his mouth followed its trail down Darcy's delicate throat, one hand in her flowing hair, the other wrapped around her, pulling her to him so there was but a tiny breadth between them.

Darcy moaned, a sound that sent every able-bodied brain cell he possessed into complete abandon. He only knew that she had made that hallowed sound because of him, and he would not rest until she was in throes of utter ecstasy.

He slid his hands across her body, searching for a knot or clasp to undo so that he could discard her outfit. Darcy giggled lightly at his hurried frustration, and meeting her eye, he bent down to his ankle and pulled out the dagger he had, until his capture on Midgard, carried on him at all times. Darcy gave a sharp intake of breath, and her eyes darkened further with anticipation as she saw the blade. In a swift motion Loki had severed several cords. A patch of Darcy's tempting skin was now accessible to him, and he bent his head, pressing his lips lightly to it. It tasted as glorious as he always thought it would, and his tongue lapped greedily at her hip, as though he would never again taste something so exquisite. Darcy moaned again- a deeper, louder one, and Loki could not help himself; he cut right up the middle of the garment, so that he could rip it all off at once.

He had just glimpsed the blush crescent of her breasts when the door to his chamber slammed open, and in a torrent of shouts, heavy boots, and metal spears, all was chaos. Darcy was ripped from him, held by a guard around the neck, his hand muffling her cries of indignation and pleas for help. She had grabbed the sheet for leverage, and now it hung in ripped tatters around her body, so that she was, at least, not naked for the whole host to see.

Before Loki could speak or react, Odin strode into the room, shaking his head in utter disbelief at the scene before him. "Loki. My son. One cannot dabble in these affairs. In these human affairs."

"Release her at once!" His voice found, Loki was sure he had never spoken with more venom or anger towards Odin than he had at this moment.

"It is you who I have come to release. You must understand that all a father wants for his son is for him to continue on an honorable path, unencumbered with such follies as these." He gestured to Darcy, who glared defiantly back at him.

"I am not your son." Loki snarled. He turned to wrench Darcy out of the guard's hold, but Odin raised a hand, and the guard beside them pressed the tip of his sword against Darcy's throat, in the exact spot where Loki had, only a short moment ago, ravenously kissed. He stopped in his tracks, and Odin sighed.

"I feared it would come to this. I rather hoped not, for I do not like to dirty my hands in this way. Still, you are far too stubborn to hear reason. The ends justify the means...a sad truth, but a truth nonetheless." It was as if, watching the events unfold, Loki had left his own body; he had no control over himself, he was frozen in place, he was unable to scream or stop the length of Odin's own spear, the sharp glint of the tip hurtling into Darcy abdomen as a hot knife through butter.

"You see, my son?" Odin's spear was glistening with Darcy's blood; it dripped from the tip, splashing to the floor where Darcy's body lay in a heap, her eyes no longer filled with her love of life, with her crackling energy, but cold, empty, dead. "This is her fate. Yours need not be bound to it."

And still he stood, immovable, but not by some magic of his own, or trickery of Odin's; no, he was paralyzed by fear and shock as the loss of her, of the woman he cared for, rolled over his body, racking him with cold sweat that ran to his blood.

"Will you not speak? Will you not rejoice in what I have done? How I have set you free?"

There could never be freedom without Darcy, that Loki knew. That he had known since the time in the elevator when she had reached out to him, needing him, wanting him. Yes, that was when it all began to happen, when he felt himself soften around her, when he felt compelled to be near her, when he wanted to be the one who caused her to smile, or to laugh...and now she was erased from existence, as quickly and surely as if she had never existed at all.

"My son, the mute!" Odin laughed a horrible, menacing laugh, a sound that got louder and louder until Loki was careening through the blackness of space, a space devoid of stars because without Darcy, why would they shine? They had no reason to.

Finally Loki jerked himself awake, out of a tangle of sheets, Odin's laugh still ringing in his ears.

oooo

Darcy hadn't been in the door two seconds when Loki swooped down on her, pulling her roughly to him. His face was buried in her hair, his arms tight around her.

"Whoa, good morning to you too," Darcy said, taken aback, but squeezing him in return.

"It is now." Loki said in a low voice, pulling away from her enough to see her face.

"You okay?" Darcy asked, brow furrowed. Loki was looking at her like they'd been apart for ages...wait, no, that wasn't really it. It was like...like he hadn't been sure that he would ever see her again. Huh. As if she had some other place to go? As if she'd want to go there, if he wasn't there? If Jane and Thor and all her other friends weren't there?

Loki gave her a long look, then released her. Jane walked briskly in behind her, mumbling hello to them both, and heading straight for the coffee maker.

"Another long night I'm guessing..." Darcy muttered, noting the deep circles under Jane's eyes. Jane never banked much sleep anyway, she had been like that as long as Darcy had ever known her, but she slept pretty soundly with Thor around. When he was gone for long periods of time or away on a mission of some sort, Jane reverted to zombie mode and usually ended up napping against the lab equipment.

Loki glanced at Jane then back at Darcy with an agreeing nod. Thor must have been off playing with the other supes, despite the holiday break Maria had offered up. Darcy's thoughts instantly turned to Area 86 and if SHIELD was trying hide anything else, anything more, from them...how would Fury react if he knew that they themselves knew SHIELD was spying on them and keeping hidden agendas?

Darcy looked around, as though she could instantly spot a hidden camera in the ceiling tiles or a mic shoved into a computer speaker. The lab looked the same as it always did; Loki sat at a table, making changes and additions to a long page of very complicated looking diagrams. Jane was scooping creamer into her coffee, missing about half of each spoonful and spilling all over the counter because she also had her nose in a German encyclopedia.

Everything looked normal, only it didn't feel that way.

"Darce, Bruce has those samples ready for me. Can you swing by his lab and grab them?" Jane called, now at her desk. Darcy nodded vaguely, her thoughts foreboding. Loki gently grabbed her hand as she passed his table, and she stopped, looking questioningly down at him.

"Everything is going to be alright, Darcy. I-" He paused, taking a breath, and Darcy noticed that he'd gone paler than normal, "I will keep you safe. Do you understand?"

She understood that he was acting super weird, but she nodded vigorously, hoping to reassure him. He brought her hand to his lips, then let go of it, though it seemed to pain him greatly to do so.

"I'll be back in a sec," She said, and he dropped his eyes back to his paper, giving her no response.

Okay, what was that all about?!

Ugh, she hated being right. Things were definitely not normal.

oooo

Bruce had been out, but he'd left the samples in a clearly marked package on the front table just inside his lab, and after a quick stop in the mail room, Darcy had hurried back, anxious to see that Loki's color had returned, that he was more himself again.

Loki was almost waiting for her, and Darcy could've sworn he'd let out a breath of relief when the glass doors closed and locked behind her. He made no move toward her, though, instead going back to his work. She shrugged to herself; boys, whether from earth or another realm, were weird.

"Mail call," Darcy announced, flipping through the stack of envelopes in her hands. There was a postcard for Jane from her mom, who was currently vacationing in Ireland, several official memos from outposts all over the world, junk mail with a few pizza delivery coupons for that she was so snagging, a National Geographic with Thor's name on it that she tossed to Loki, and a cream colored envelope with a gold seal on the back.

"Oh hell..." The looped writing on the front was addressed to her. She groaned, knowing full well that it wasn't anything she would be happy about.

"Anything good?" Jane asked, noticing Darcy glaring at the envelope.

Without a word, Darcy passed the piece of mail to Jane, holding it by its edge as though it were contaminated.

"Ah," Jane said as she read the return address. Loki watched the whole affair with curiosity, wondering what on earth could be so horrible about the small card Jane now held in her hand.

"Maybe it's for a funeral?" Jane suggested with a shrug.

Darcy rolled her eyes, snatching the card back from Jane. "As if I'd be that lucky." She flipped it open, scanned over its contents as quickly as she could, then marched to the nearest garbage can and tossed it inside.

"Who this time?" Jane asked knowingly, looking as though she wanted to fish the thing from the trash but knowing she better not.

Darcy heaved a sigh, dramatically falling into her rolling chair. "I don't even want to talk about it." Couldn't her family have enough tact to send such bad news to her actual home address? No, of course not. It had be flashy, had to be something that would be seen by more eyes than just Darcy's. Jane seemed to be thinking along these same lines, and quickly deduced what must have transpired.

"Jasmine and Lucas finally getting hitched, then?"

"Why would they bother with it now? They've been dating for like, a bajillion years. I mean, what's so wrong with living in sin, hmm?" Darcy's eyes met Loki's and she hurriedly glanced away, trying not to blush. Talk about sin...she remembered the way Loki had looked at her in her dream, before pulling the knife from his boot, how his lips had felt against her bare hip...if only she hadn't woken up just as he had cut her free of that ridiculous costume...okay, super bad train of thought for a work day...

"Well...they are family. Maybe it's a good thing they invited you? They obviously want you there." When this did not dispel Darcy's dark glower, Jane changed tactics. "You'd better not be like this when it's my wedding invitation you get in the mail." Jane teased, and Darcy lifted her head.

"You say that as if I'm not the one who will be planning the whole thing."

Jane's eyes widened. "Think again, Darcy Lewis. Thor and I want a quiet, small-"

"WHAT?!" Darcy shrieked, jerking up and staring at Jane as though she'd lost her everloving mind. "You're seriously just messing with me, right?"

Jane shook her head. "Do you honestly think that I want a huge spectacle? I mean, really, we'll probably just end up eloping-"

"JANE FOSTER-"

"Or a courthouse wedding, with just the judge, that's really more appealing, don't you think? That's how Thor's leaning, anyway."

"WHERE IS THAT USELESS FIANCE OF YOURS? I WILL TAN HIS HIDE!" Darcy violently pushed herself away from her desk and stalked over to Loki, ripping the magazine from his hands. "We have a crisis here Loki, okay? Why don't you, unlike your buffoon of a brother, help instead of hinder?" She pushed her cell phone into his hand. "This," she tapped an icon, "is called Pinterest and it's going to help us avert catastrophe. I want ideas on flower arrangements, okay? Are you listening, Loki? Vintage rustic should do it." Darcy hurried away without waiting for him to answer or to clarify just what the hell she meant, and they heard her rummaging around in the back of the lab.

Jane gave Loki a small wink, and he understood that she'd changed the subject to get Darcy outraged on purpose, to take her mind off her family. It struck him that he could learn a lot indeed from Jane Foster.

Darcy came back to them, notebook and pen in hand, an extra pen stuck behind her ear for good measure.

"Okay, so what are we talking budget-wise? Obviously," Darcy chuckled, "Asgardian currency isn't going to cut it. How much does your mom have stashed away?" The pen was poised over a fresh sheet of paper, Darcy itching to take notes.

Jane swiveled around in her chair, hands wrapped around a cup of coffee. "I'm guessing nothing?"

Darcy cocked an eyebrow. "Are you...are you trying to be funny?"

Jane shrugged. "What difference does it make anyway? I mean, Thor is an Avenger. Once we set a date people will be lining up to throw free things at him, won't they?"

Darcy shot Loki a look. "Is she really serious?"

Loki, uncomfortable at being a part of this conversation at all, merely stared back at her, open-mouthed.

"Oh c'mon Darce, think about it! While lecturing at a seminar about the Einsten-Rosen Bridge, I could casually drop that I need a wedding dress. Or at a luncheon for Culver alums, I can mention that the catering is superb and would be perfect for our reception. We'd have more freebies than we would know what to do with. For once Thor's fame wouldn't be such a pain in the neck."

Darcy briefly considered it, but then scoffed. "I mean yeah, alright, Thor is okay. He's not bad. Somewhat easy on the eyes, charming when he isn't breaking things or destroying property, but...you're Jane fricken Foster! Face it. Your boyfriend is cool, but you're cooler."

Jane flushed, but only shrugged again. Darcy gaped at her, finally shaking her head in disbelief, giving her up as a lost cause.

"When is this...uh...event, anyway?" Jane ventured after a few moments of silence.

Darcy blew out a breath. "They're doing everything fucking backwards, as usual. The reception is the night before, and the wedding ceremony is the next afternoon."

"So you'll be gone overnight?" Jane said, noting the way Loki's mouth dropped into a frown.

"Who says I'm going?"

"You are." Jane said decisively. "As horrible as they are to you, you would never be that way to them."

Darcy looked doubtful and Loki, for one, hoped that Jane was wrong. The last place Darcy should be was in the midst of people, family no less, who made her miserable. He understood all too well what that could do to a person. Loki was sure Darcy's anxiety would not do well in such an environment.

Spinning in her chair, Darcy stopped, facing the wall, her neck draped over the back of the chair. "Yeah, well...anyway. It'll be easier to stay the night. The hotel isn't bad- I mean, definitely overpriced, probably a gaudy mess knowing Jasmine's taste, but it has decent reviews." Darcy limply indicated her computer, where a travel website was pulled up. "And then I'm out for at least a year." Darcy pulled herself up and back to her desk. "Two, actually. I think this kind of torture definitely deserves a two year hiatus."

Jane nodded in vigorous agreement and opened her mouth like she wanted to say something, but, with a furtive look at Loki, thought better of it.

oooo

The days before the wedding seemed to speed by, melting quickly away. Her friends, however, rallied magnificently, determined to keep her cheerful and her mind off the impending doom of such a huge family function. Thor and the rest of the Avengers returned, and the night before Dacry had to leave, Jane threw together a huge dinner with everyone, deciding to have it in the lab, so that Loki could attend, too. He did so only because Darcy asked him to; he certainly had no desire to spend any of his free time with those who had (however justly so) captured and imprisoned him. Yet the fact that he was even willing spoke volumes to those who were listening (Tony, Jane, Thor), and the night was a resounding success.

Loki had been on the brink of suggesting that Darcy stay with him that evening; the dinner would be over late, she would want plenty of rest, etc...he had many reasons to help implore her, but found his invitation unnecessary. Jane had already offered up her guest room, and Darcy had gratefully accepted. Very well, then. He would simply have to be more prudent in future, and beat Jane to the punch.

The following morning Darcy's suitcase was packed and the SHIELD car was waiting to take her to the airport. It would be a short flight, only forty-five minutes, and it was only one night in the hotel and she had, thank god, called ahead to make sure her room was at lease two floors away from anybody she was remotely related to.

Still, it seemed as though she were leaving for a long time, and she didn't like that feeling at at all. Loki was waiting for her as far as his anklet would allow, at the end of the corridor; Jane and Thor were down by the car.

"Be safe, my Darcy." Loki bent down to give her a soft kiss on her forehead. She hugged him tightly, trying not to think about how much bearable this ordeal would be if Loki could be with her. Loki would understand her fucked up family, and he would be able to find a way to make her laugh about the whole thing.

"Try to keep it all together while I'm gone, yeah? Jane is like, totally useless without me."

"I will do what I can. I am not a miracle worker."

Despite her crappy mood, Darcy smiled. "Thanks. Ugh, if I don't go now, I'll never leave. Okay, here I go. See you soon. I mean," Darcy backtracked, "that is, if you want me to come over when I get back, I totally understand if you don't-"

"I look forward to it." Loki assured her, tucking her hair behind her ear. "You can handle this, Darcy." He said it gravely, but it was encouraging nonetheless. She gave him one last smile and then forced herself to leave his arms, quickly walking down the hall before she was tempted to turn around to get a last glimpse of him.

oooo

Darcy sighed, putting the finishing touches on her make up. She knew that no matter what she looked like or wore, her family would be critical. She somehow had been far more endowed than any of the other females she was related to, and they all felt the need to point it out every time they got together. Sure, Darcy wasn't as thin as she was in college, but she had a pretty high profile job, bucket loads of stress, and didn't keep a typical nine to five schedule. She also detested the gym, and besides, who cared what she looked like? Was dropping some weight going to make her and Nick Fury besties all of a sudden? Would fitting into Lydia's bikinis get her off Maria Hill's shit list? Double nope on that one. She might as well worry about more important things than her waist size.

So she tried not to care about her looks, and with SHIELD and Jane and Loki and Thor and the rest of her friends, it was easy. She truly felt that they valued her for who she was and what she'd proved to them she could do. Away from her family and working for Fury, Darcy had gained a confidence she didn't know was possible.

Aaaand her family would be pros at wrecking it all. They were insensitive and vindictive, and she knew that, had always known it, had tried her hardest to behave as differently from them as she could. And yet...they still held some stupid power over her, their criticisms still stung, their disapproval of everything from her hair style to how much or little she spent on shoes still bothering her even after all these years.

Darcy took a deep breath; it would be fine. It had to be. Above all else, Loki believed she could deal with the batshit crazies she would be forced, in a few short minutes, to be with for the next eighteen hours.

And if Loki believed she could...well, she owed it to him to try.

oooo

The next few hours passed in a mind-numbing blur. Thankfully, nobody in her family cared much for her opinion on things, or an update on her life, so after the initial greetings in the large ball room where the reception was being held she was able to sit in silence, stuffing mini crepes and shots from the bar in her mouth every time she was tempted to insert herself into any of the conversations around her.

Eventually, though, she found herself seated at a table with her mother, aunt, and cousin, and having exhausted all other subjects, Darcy's mom decided to turn to her daughter with a barrage of insults thinly veiled as questions.

A half an hour later of dragging her only child through the proverbial mud in regards to her social life, wailing about the fact that a single daughter was a useless daughter, Darcy's jaw was becoming more tightly clenched with every passing minute. When her mother showed no signs of letting up, when she actually seemed, after several glasses of white wine, to be getting a second wind, Darcy decided she couldn't keep her mouth shut any longer.

"Actually, I have met someone." She interrupted coolly, gripping her beer bottle, willing herself to remain calm.

Her mother and aunt glanced skeptically at each other.

"Have you?" Her cousin asked, absently shaking the ice in her glass.

"Yeah. He's pretty incredible, actually." Darcy gave a small smile, Loki's green eyes and classic smirk filling her mind.

"You met him- at a bar? On the street?" Her aunt asked, and all Darcy really wanted to do was was get away from here- that, or bash the bottle in her hand over her aunt's head. Getting away was the one least likely to end in bloodshed.

"No Ceila," Darcy sucked in a breath, forcing her voice to come out calm and even. "At work. See, I actually have this thing called a career." Darcy shot a nasty look at her cousin who stared back, unabashed.

It was no secret that Lydia had made zero attempt at completing high school. Darcy had been glad when Lydia made the cheer leading squad, hoping that the dedication and hard work it required would straighten her cousin, with whom she had once been close, out. It had the opposite effect, and two months in Lydia was kicked off the squad for failing grades and sneaking off during a football game at half-time to get shitfaced with her twenty year old boyfriend. The cheer coach had called the cops, and Lydia earned herself an underage drinking charge. Community service did little to change her attitude, and Darcy was pretty sure that Lydia only went on to graduate high school because she was on friendly terms- veryfriendly terms- with the vice principal. Two years later and her attitude hadn't changed much. She didn't have a job, had no plans for college or trade school or even an online course, trashed her parents pool house with parties nearly every weekend, and was content to let her long stream of boy toys pay for the things she wanted. Her parents didn't seem to mind, claiming that Lydia was young and needed to "find herself". If ever there was a human definition of a spoiled brat, it was Lydia.

"Oh Darcy," Her mother said flippantly, "making coffee and answering phones is not a career. Now, if you'd gone to law school like I wanted-"

"I don't just answer phones, mom, you know that." Darcy took a large swig of beer, wondering when the hell the waitress was coming back. She needed another round before she lost her shit.

"If you met a guy at SHEILD, considering your position of gofer, well, one must assume he's simply...what was the term?" Celia looked to her daughter for help.

"Slumming it." Lydia answered with a satisfied smirk.

"You'd know." Darcy snapped, and Celia gasped, her hand over her heart.

"Oh shove it, Celia. Your daughter's an embarrassment to this entire family and so are you."

"Darcy!" Her mother cried, but Darcy had had enough. It was time she stood up for herself. She wasn't their little punching bag anymore, she wasn't weak enough to sit by and take their abuse with a tight smile like she'd done for the past few years. She shoved her beer into her mom's hand and stormed away, vowing to pack her shit and head home that night.

Luckily she didn't meet anyone in the hall, or the elevator, and once she was back to her room
Darcy slammed her the door shut behind her, kicking her heels off furiously, sinking onto her bed. After a few minutes in the heavy quiet of the room, her anger was starting to abate, shame taking its place. Not shame because of what she had said to her family, they definitely deserved far worse and on the whole, she ought to be commended for not throwing punches. No, it was that the people who truly cared about her had believed that she could keep her cool. Loki and Jane were so sure she could take the high road, yet here she was, seething and pouting in her room after causing a scene.

She could be pissed that her family was made up of pathetic bitches who were so miserable in their own lives that they had to bring everybody down to their level. Darcy knew that, had always known that, and her grandma, had she been alive, would have shut that shit down so fast...but that wasn't what was really bothering her. Those words stuck with her- not the remarks about her weight, or her makeup, or her lack of ambition, but what they'd said about Loki.

Slumming it.

That couldn't be true, could it? Loki always seemed so genuine when he was with her, showing her a side of himself that nobody else got to see. He'd helped her so many times, without a thought as to how she could pay him back. He was selfless where she was concerned. Their chemistry was so strong she felt it very nearly burning her skin sometimes.

Okay, yeah, she had to admit it had always been a little weird, that Loki liked her. He was so smart, so powerful, so much more than anybody she'd ever known. Human or not, guys like Loki did not fall for girls like her. Jane was more his type. Gorgeous and able to keep up with his brains, somebody who had achieved so much in her life.

Yes, that was the sort of woman Loki ought to be with, not her, not somebody so dramatic and ridiculous, who flew off the handle at the smallest things. Not her, with her useless college degree, her baggage, her lack of conventional beauty. What, really, did she have to offer Loki?

It was entirely possible that he was just bored, here on earth, trying to find something to pass the time. How could she have ever hoped to have something lasting with him? Loki could have his pick of women across any of the realms, and probably had. There was no reason he should actually want her when he could have so much better. That's what it came down to, right? She simply wasn't good enough for him.

Of course, she'd practically forced herself on him, making him spend all that time with her, dragging him out into the snow, wanting him to kiss her. Ugh, thinking of it now made her skin crawl- how could she have been so pathetic? Her feelings for him had made her so desperate! She didn't deserve everything he'd done for her, everything he'd given her. If she could, she'd give it all back- let him off the hook, let him out of his obligation. That's what it was, of course. Him always rushing to her aid, well he couldn't let anything happen to her, not with Fury and the whole of SHIELD watching his every move, could he?

How could she face him again? How could she look him in those breathtaking green eyes, knowing how truly undeserving she was of any of his attention? Maybe Loki would be glad to be rid of her, for her to finally discover the truth. He would never intentionally hurt her, but he'd at least be grateful he didn't have to put on a charade any longer.

And who, Darcy thought bitterly, could blame him?

oooo

It was late, the sun having set long ago, yet Jane seemed in no rush to finish up her work for the day and go home. Loki could only assume that Thor was still off, playing hero, and that like himself, Jane had nobody to go home to. He had no desire to leave the lab, his apartment holding no allure for him now that it was devoid of Darcy.

"You miss her, don't you?" Jane asked curiously, watching Loki stare vaguely out the window, tapping his fingers on the table in some sort of rhythm.

Loki glanced at her, but didn't reply. Jane smiled knowingly.

"Well let's see what she's up to." She turned to her laptop, clicked an icon, and pulled up a social media account.

"She is with her family, I hardly think-"

"I'm not trying to message her or anything. She wouldn't answer anyway- she'd want us to think she's too busy having a good time to check her phone. But, I am friends with her cousin, Lydia." Jane turned the computer so Loki, who had come closer, could see. At the top of the page was a picture of a girl in a string bikini, her skin the orange tint of somebody who frequently hit the tanning bed. She was wearing over-sized sunglasses, her mouth pulled into an exaggerated pout. Glancing over to the margin of the page, where smaller photos were, Loki saw that every single one of them was of herself- no friends or family members.

"Yeah," Jane said, noting the puzzled look on Loki's face, "thinks a lot of herself, right? And believe me when I say, she's the nice one.

"You jest."

Jane shook her head. "Nope. Darce's family is the kind you read about in self-help books, you know? They've never been very supportive of her. Her dad is okay, I mean he's not winning any father of the year awards, but compared to the rest of them..." Jane trailed off, browsing through the page.

Loki wondered, not for the first time, what had made Darcy even bother to attend this event. Did she not see how above these people she was? The only family member she spoke of with any real fondness was her departed grandmother. He looked forlornly over at Darcy's empty desk, wishing she were here to fill the room with her usual brightness, with her captivating smile.

"Ah, here were are!" Jane waved him over. There was a large picture on the screen, one of several women together, and he spotted Darcy instantly. She looked very becoming indeed in a black, sleeveless dress, her hair lightly tousled around her shoulders. Her expression, however, was not like the women around her, all toothy smiles and laughter. There was a tight grimace on her face, as though she had been threatened with her life to stand there with this group while the photograph was taken. Based on the descriptions of her family, Loki would not be surprised if that was in fact the case.

"Doesn't look like she's having a great time, does she?" Jane observed, moving her screen back in front of her.

"One cannot blame her, of course." Loki said, still trying to figure out how Darcy had come from such people.

"Actually, I'm kind of glad to have this alone time with you. I've been meaning to talk to you for a few days." Loki, surprised, spread his hands in front of him, gesturing for her to continue.

"Normally, I wouldn't exactly be thrilled that Darcy was, you know, engaging in relations, with a criminal." Jane looked at him seriously over her hands. "But Thor's right. You've changed a lot, particularly in the last little while. I have to assume that's in some way because of Darcy. She has that effect on people. She's really one of a kind...but there's something you need to understand. For Darcy's sake and your own. She doesn't do things half-way, I'm sure you've noticed that." He had, of course. It was one of the things he genuinely liked about her. Such dedication and loyalty was admirable in anybody, but even more so in somebody whose life had not been exactly a cake walk, as the saying went.

"I can tell that she really likes you. Not just in passing, and not just casually. You mean a lot to her, and there's really no going back. I mean," Jane hastily said, "I don't expect you to like, spend your life with her or anything, I just-"

Loki raised a silencing hand. "I know very well what you mean, and you need not worry. My intentions with Darcy are the same as hers are with me." At the very least, he assumed they were. He was not sure what the future held for him, but he knew he wanted Darcy in it, to whatever capacity she desired.

Jane smiled. "Good. If Fury comes through for Thor, then you won't have to go back and face Odin, right?" Jane went back to her keyboard, clacking away, while Loki retook his place at his own desk, her words resting uneasily in the air.

oooo

Some time later Loki decided he may as well go back to his apartment. Without Darcy in the lab he found it harder somehow to concentrate, and without Thor or her best friend, Jane was not great company either.

Loki was restless, uneasy. He was not sure what was causing this. He had made plans to relax to some of the softer music Darcy had provided him, jazz she called it, whilst enjoying a large glass of brandy, before turning in early and getting what he hoped would be a restful night's sleep.

Only now, just now, he felt something was horribly wrong. It could have been that he was hyper focused on Darcy's absence; people often worried much more for their loved ones safety and well-being when they were away, but this, Loki strongly felt, was not the case.

He had no way to communicate with her, though he knew if he but asked, Jane would call her in a heartbeat. He did not want to be overbearing, and though he was sure that Darcy wouldn't think of it that way, he wanted her to know that she could come and go as she pleased, that she did not need to think of him or worry about him while she was gone.

If only he could see her, just for a moment, to know that she was, at least, safe, that she wasn't suffering from a debilitating panic attack or something as equally dangerous.

Pacing in front of the sofa, Loki turned to the windows, a finger raised in thought. Perhaps...perhaps he could glimpse her. It had happened once before, and it had been real, however improbable he had, at the time, deemed it. Yet it truly had taken place, and Darcy had made a few offhand comments since then that had only further proved the experience.

It had been an accident, then, a happy one indeed, but chance all the same. He was not entirely sure how to establish that link again, at least not without the aid of his magic. Perhaps this time...just this once, and only a small amount of it...surely it was understandable, and anyone would agree that Darcy's well being came first and foremost...

Loki moved so his back was to the windows, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply, focusing on the cackling energy that flowed through him, that he wretchedly had to keep at bay because of his promise to Thor. He called Darcy to his mind, her flowing hair, her laugh, her deep, incessant need to care for others before herself. He imagined the connection between them, a physical cord of light and power merging with each of them at either end. Slowly he could feel Darcy's own particular essence line up with his own, as if a blurry picture had come into focus. It was as though merely a wall were separating them, now, and if Loki could but breach it, there, on the other side, Darcy would be.

He moved in his mind's eye, trying to find any chinks in that black wall, any slivers of the brightness he so associated with Darcy, but all was dark and thick around him. It reminded him of the time before she had come into his life as intimately as she had of late...before he had decided to reach out for her as she had reached out for him in the elevator...before somebody had given him a chance, and before he had realized his pain was not singularly felt or singularly important.

Loki urged his magic, trying to attack the strong blockade from all sides. He used only as much as he dared- he certainly did not need the whole of SHIELD to know he was breaking his agreements. Helpless and exhausted, Loki finally pulled himself back, the light of his connection to his own mental image of Darcy sputtering out until it was nonexistent.

oooo

Hours later, the room dark and stifling, Darcy woke, her head pounding, her face crusted with smeared mascara and eyeliner. She hadn't been able to shake the feelings of doubt, of self-loathing, that her family had, in merely a few seconds, implanted into her mind. That they could shatter her own perception of her and Loki's relationship in only one conversation was a sickening testament to the hold they still had over her.

No doubt about it, coming here had been a mistake.

Her mind was a mess- a cacophony of panic and regret and, however pathetic, wishful thinking. She could be mistaken about her insignificance in relation to Loki, right?. He might well actually like her. She thought she could see his affection for her, sometimes, when he looked at her. Or was that part of her clearly obvious delusion?

Darcy pulled her knees to her chest, her right hand finding its way to the top of her thigh, where several thick scars ran parallel to each other, wounds from a previous tag team barrage from her mom and aunt. That had been several years ago, and she had grown so little since then...

Yet these scars were proof that she had found a way to drown out her family's screeching disappointment, their unrelenting critique on every aspect of her life. Darcy sucked in a steadying breath; it was hard to ignore her desire for that feeling again, for the sweet release of one pain overshadowing, overcoming, another.

Her hands were shaking, her eyes swimming with more tears, as she reached for the lamp on the bedside table. The room was now bathed in dim light, and she stood from the bed, going to the window, pulling open the curtain. The city shone below her, twinkling lights of buildings and zooming cars...Loki flashed through her mind again, her forehead tingling as though he had just been there, just given her that sweet and gentle parting kiss...

The room was starting to spin, now, and Darcy cursed her own weakness as familiar and detested panic overtook her senses, crowded her vision. She sunk to the floor, unable to move, unable to do more than wish for something, for anything, to take this away, to take her away, even if it had to hurt, even if she had to bleed, even if it meant she had more scars to hide.

It would be a small price to pay to forget who she was.

oooo

Loki had left his apartment slightly earlier than normal, after deciding that being stuck there alone for a moment longer would be unbearable. As he approached the glass door, he actually stopped in his tracks, wondering if he was hallucinating the scene before him. Darcy was here, Darcy was in the lab, smiling at him as though she had simply been waiting for him.

He quickened his step, and met her at the door. He roughly pulled her into his arms, a small jolt going through him at the contact, as he felt more at peace, more complete, then he had since the last time she had been this close to him.

When she pulled away from him, Loki thought there was, perhaps, a slight hesitation in her eyes when his gaze met hers, but her lips were still pulled into a smile, greeting him a she had every morning for the past few months.

"Coffee?" She asked, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, hurriedly averting her eyes to Jane, who had just come into the lab, looking as equally surprised as Loki had at Darcy's early return.

He had not imagined it, then. There was something nervous in Darcy's manner, as though she did not want to fully look him in the face, or speak directly to him. It was as if she were hiding something from him...or that there was something she was sure he would say, or do, that she did not want to be a part of.

"Make it a double for me." Jane said, grimacing. "Thor was off Avenging in the middle of the night and I couldn't go back to sleep. Also, I'm so glad you're back." It was all Jane would say to Darcy's face about her being home much sooner than anticipated, and Loki decided to follow that lead.

Darcy nodded and swept away to the coffee maker, leaving Jane and Loki alone.

"Just don't ask. It's easier. And this," Jane gestured to Darcy banging drawers around, "is normal." Jane muttered. "She'll want to hide it, but she always has a really hard time with her family. But if she's back early, maybe-" Jane stopped, shaking her head. "Never mind. Just be patient with her, okay? And expect a classic Darcy Lewis freak out. That's when things will get back to normal."

Loki nodded slowly. So his instincts had been correct last night. Darcy had been in pain, had struggled, and he did not, and could not, help her at all. He had never felt more useless in all his life.

oooo

Darcy slipped out of the lab while Jane, Bruce, and Loki were engrossed in some new page of equations. She needed to get away for a bit, to breathe, to not have Loki's scent wafting around, enticing her. It was bad enough that she'd have to let him go- for she had decided last night that it really just had to be done, that the poor guy deserved to be let off the hook. She couldn't imagine her life without Loki, without his soft touches and the way he always seemed to know exactly when she needed a shoulder to cry on. He'd been there for her more in the past few months than anybody else had been in her entire life, helping her, healing her, giving her a reason to smile.

But no more. Darcy couldn't expect him to carry on like this. She wasn't his burden, and she'd never had the right to push herself on him. She'd still see him at work, of course, which was better than nothing, and if he ever asked her over, well, she wouldn't turn that down, either. She'd take everything she could get, really. In all honesty, she would give anything for Loki to care for her, to need her, like she did him, but the bottom line was, Loki deserved somebody he could be proud of, somebody he could show off, somebody so amazing that they brought meaning to his life.

With all of her jagged edges, all of her short-comings and frailties, how could she have ever hoped to be that somebody?

oooo

Loki watched Darcy disappear through the lab doors, a frown on his face. She had been so distant with him, with them all, today. It was quite unnerving, actually, and he had never before realized how much he had come to enjoy her chatter.

"Well I'm off. Tony wants to meet for lunch, and the last time I told him no he got bored and you know, destroyed half my lab." Bruce reached for his jacket and shuffled towards the door.

"If only Pepper would hire a babysitter." Jane grinned, waving as Bruce left the room. Loki went to the fridge behind the counter and pulled out two containers, each containing a sub sandwich, a sliced apple, and a bag of potato chips. Out of habit, he had prepared a lunch for himself and Darcy today, not liking how she sometimes skipped the meal because she was so busy. It seemed he would be dining without her this afternoon.

"So Darcy's not coming around, huh?" Jane eyed the two lunches, as Loki forlornly put the second container back into the fridge.

"She will not say more than a few words to me." He growled in frustration, picking up a piece of apple and glaring at it.

Jane nodded, hopping up onto the counter. "It's been like this ever since I've known her. Darce works so hard being there for everybody else, she forgets that we're here for her, too."

"Indeed." Loki grimaced, then took a bite of the sandwich. It was Darcy's favorite- turkey, swiss, avacado spread, crisp bacon, yellow mustard and oregano. He had made it to her exact specifications, even layering the ingredients in the most "yummy" (according to Darcy) order.

"Darcy isn't the kind who purposely airs her issues, you know? They're under the surface, if she can help it."

"I had hoped that she would understand I am not someone she should hide them from." Had he not been there for her in other instances? Had she not seen him at nearly his very worst? Even if the abundant romantic spark had not been there, they were at least friends, dare he say good friends. Darcy could lay any and all at his feet and he would do everything he was capable of to help her. How had he not shown her that, beyond any doubt?

Jane shrugged. "Hey, we all feel that way. I wouldn't even know that she had these problems if it wasn't for her guidance counselor from college."

"Guidance counselor?"

"They're kind of like mentors, or therapists. They help the students decide what their majors will be, what courses they need to take, what goals to set. They also offer counseling services and most, if not all, college kids need them. Darce is no exception, although she would rather die than admit it. When she started getting really bad anxiety attacks, it was after her grandma died, her parents didn't know what to do with her. In all honestly, I don't think they ever believed her- at least, her mom didn't, and still doesn't. Her dad...I think he's more inclined to believe her, but then Darcy was always closer to him than her mother. Anyway," Jane paused, taking a sip of coffee, "She'd gone home one weekend, there was some family party, and she had a really bad attack. Hyperventilating, fainting, the whole works. Somebody called 911 and her parents made her spend a week in the psych ward. To be frank, I think she needed it. Finally there, at the hospital, she could talk to people who understood what she was going through, she could relate to them. Well, all of this was before she signed up to be my intern, so I can't genuinely say if Darcy was much different then as compared to now. This is all stuff I learned from the notes from the sessions with the counselor. Darce doesn't know it, and I don't ever want her to find out, but I read her file to process her application for the internship."

Loki stood, taken aback. He had sensed, of course, that not one of Darcy's family ever tried to care about her in the ways she needed them to, and that she had dealt with her states of mind practically alone. He had never wondered, though, how deep these issues had affected her, how hard her struggle must have been.

If anybody knew first-hand what it was like to be on their own...

"Her being taken to hospital...was that the worst of everything?"

Jane pursed her lips, as if she knew something, but didn't want to say. "...yes, and no. At least, I'm not sure/. I didn't...I mean, I should've, I know I should've, but I didn't want her to think..." Jane took a deep breath. "I'm a bad person, Loki, okay? You should know that. I can admit that. I haven't old anybody about this, because I figured it's Darcy's business and nobody else's...but she's sort of your business, isn't she?"

"What the Hel are you speaking of?!"

"There was another...incident. It was right after Thor left New Mexico. I was...god, I was such a mess. I mean, I'd fallen so hard for him and he'd slipped right through my fingers, and we couldn't find him. I tried so hard to, searched to the actual ends of the earth, and still nothing. I know now, of course, what happened to the Bifrost, but then I just assumed he'd abandoned me. Well, I did what I do best. I buried myself in my work. Darcy had graduated by then, but she was still working with me. I couldn't pay her much but I'd managed to get a grant from a planetarium in Phoenix, so we were a little better off than we'd been before, living in the desert in a bunch of tin cans. We went to a conference, somewhere in the midwest, and what a coincidence, her mom and aunt happened to be in town, visiting a second cousin or something. So Darcy goes out to dinner with them- she invited me, and in retrospect I should've gone with her. But I thought, hey, maybe her mom has come around, at least a little bit. People change, they grow. I thought it would be a good chance for them to catch up- Darcy had so little contact with her family."

Jane ran her finger around the rim of her mug, giving a small sigh. "Anyway, we were sharing a room to cut costs- anything we could save we could put back into our research. So I took off to the nearest library for a few hours and when I came back to the room, I found Darce asleep on top of her blankets...well, she'd had a lot to drink, I think, I could smell the booze on her, you know? I thought she'd just had too many long island iced teas. So I went to cover her up, and that's when I saw the blood."

Loki's sense of foreboding had been slowly building the entire time Jane had been telling him this story, this memory from years ago. He had been gripping the back of his usual chair, his knuckles white from his firm grip.

"Darcy was so out of it that I was able to clean it up without her even waking up. There were a few...cuts. I didn't know if they were...I mean she could've just done it on accident while shaving, I guess, but..." Jane trailed off. Further explanation was unnecessary. Loki had heard all he needed to, all he could stomach. He felt anger and worry crackle through him, his blood pumping through his body as though it were full of sparks, of fire.

He swept from the room without bothering to reply to Jane, thinking only of finding Darcy.

oooo

Darcy left the building, needing some air, needing to be lost in the noise and lunch rush of the city. She craved anonymity at that moment, to be just another one of the thousand other people rushing to and fro. Earlier this morning Jane had given her the meteorite ring Thor had proposed with, asking her to drop it off at a specialized cleaner she knew. So Darcy stuck the small box Thor had kept the ring in into her pocket and left the moment she had a chance, using the small errand as an excuse to slack off.

"Lewis!"

Darcy cursed aloud- of course she couldn't walking down the effing street and blend in like a normal person.

Darcy turned to her left, seeing Tony Stark himself waving at her, seated in an outdoor terrace at a swanky restaurant Darcy had often stopped outside to check out the menu, but never seriously considered eating at. The apps and a glass of wine alone would've eaten half her paycheck.

"Care to join?" Tony indicated the vacant seat across from him.

Darcy shrugged, hopping over the small wrought iron fence that separated the tables from the sidewalk. Killing some time here with Tony or wandering aimlessly through the city blocks made no difference to her, she was just doing whatever she could to put off the inevitable task of making herself scarce in Loki's life.

"I thought Bruce was your lunch date?" Darcy asked, and dropped unceremoniously into the chair.

"He was, but there was some chemical disaster in Bangladesh that needed his full attention. Or was it Barcelona? Either way," Tony waved a hand flippantly, "he's out, you're in. So, what'll you have?" Tony made eye contact with the waiter, who rushed over, awaiting Darcy's order.

"Whatever the Special is- unless it has tentacles, then no way, count me out."

The waiter shook his head. "Goat cheese and spinach ravioli in a pancetta Alfredo."

Darcy nodded and the waiter whisked away, returning seconds later with a basket of fresh bread and a tall glass of sparkling ice water.

"Odd to see you take a lunch break outside of the lab, isn't it?" Tony said, slathering butter on a slice of bread and pushing it towards Darcy.

"I don't know, maybe. I just needed...a change of scenery I guess." Darcy took a bite out of the bread, dropping her eyes to the table. Lately something about Tony made her a little wary- not that he was ever rude or overbearing (to her personally, anyway), just that he always seemed to know more than he let on.

"When I started getting it bad for Pepper, I started taking my lunches to go, too." Tony mused, a knowing smirk on his face.

Darcy ignored this, taking another bite of bread.

"Do you know the first time I realized I loved her?" Tony shot the question at Darcy, who couldn't resist the urge to snap back at him. "How the fudge am I supposed to know that?!"

"It wasn't love at first sight or anything. Sure, Pep was nice to look at- but she always wore her hair up and never put on anything that afforded me any glimpses of what lay beneath the power suit."

"Yeah well who can blame her? Her boss was a perv." Darcy said dismissively.

"Is a perv." Tony corrected. Darcy wanted to point out that actually Pepper was head of SI, not him, so he may still have been gross, but he wasn't her boss. Though, what was the point? Tony Stark did not care about technicalities.

"So does this snoozer have a point or-"

"The point is," Tony said, aggravated, "when I knew I loved Pepper, was when I was at my worst. You don't sabotage your own security system and start giving away all your personal possessions and ask Romanoff for life advice unless you've already got one foot off the ledge, right?"

Darcy gave an acquiescing nod- she had to give him that one. Not about the life advice- she hardcore girlcrushed Nat, but about the personal hijacking and the doling out of possessions.

"Without Pepper and Rhodey, who knows what I could've become? Without the people who love us and accept us- the good and the insane alike- what could any of us become?"

"Look, I don't even know how you know...whatever it is you know. But honestly dude, you don't get it at all. This isn't about Loki, okay." Once again Darcy was dumbfounded at Tony's ability to so expertly read the situation.

"Who do you think I'm talking about, Lewis? Geez, not everything is about your Teen Beat cover boy."

Darcy rolled her eyes, her cheeks hot. "What I mean is, I'm the problem. Not Loki."

Tony gave her a look- one of mixed sympathy, understanding, and arrogance- that she immediately wanted to smack off his face. "Pepper wasn't the problem either." He stood up and laid a few bills down, easily covering their lunch with a very generous tip for the server.

"I'll give you some alone time, but don't insult Andre by not getting shaved truffles on the pasta, okay?" He squeezed her shoulder affectionately, then strolled away, leaving Darcy to her very tangled thoughts.

oooo

"Oh, hey Darce." Jane looked up as Darcy rushed into the lab.

"Right, hi. Where's Loki?"

Jane smirked. "I sent him home. After you left he was completely useless. Totally lost without you, if you ask me."

Darcy flushed, but didn't reply as she spun on her heel and burned rubber out of the lab doors and towards the stairs. Despite not initially wanting to listen to it, Tony's advice had given her plenty to think about. She knew it was now or never, and there was no point in beating around the bush any longer. She would say her piece to Loki, and hope that he understood her feelings.

She took the stairs two at a time, coming to a halt outside of Loki's door. She lifted her hand, took a deep breath, and knocked, the door swinging open almost immediately.

"Darcy." Loki's face relaxed with abrupt relief.

"Hi," She said, trying to swallow the slight hysteria rising inside her throat. No, no, she could do this. She could be calm and rational and-

It happened before she could even take another breath- Loki had cupped her face in both of his hands and leaned down into her, pressing his lips to hers, kissing her fervently, heat rising between them as Darcy's mind, slowed to a crawl by Loki's closeness and the intensity of the kiss, finally caught up to what was happening. Loki dropped one hand and wrapped it around her waist, pulling her flush against him. Her hands lay flat against his chest, a torrent of incredibly pleasant chills running down her entire body, pulling her out of everything- the hallway, the whole floor, reality. If this was what Jane felt when she kissed Thor, well, no wonder Darcy ran into them slobbering all over each other all the time.

Loki broke away first; perhaps he knew that Darcy would rather have passed out from lack of oxygen then stop kissing him, then even to take the chance at the fire between them becoming extinguished, even for a second.

Loki rested his forehead against hers, then snapped his head up, looking wildly around.

"UM," Bemused, Darcy had pulled slightly back from Loki, but now she too flung her head from side to side, her mind that had been crawling through mud now in severe overdrive. They definitely weren't in the hallway between Loki and Jane and Thor's apartment anymore! They weren't even inside anymore! There were standing, under the night sky, somewhere out in the vast open country. What had felt like transcendence from the real world had in fact been just that. Well, could she be blamed for not noticing? Loki had completely blindsided her with the most amazing kiss she'd ever had. If she were dazed, out of it, well, it was totes his fault.

"Where the fuck are we?" Darcy looked around, her eyes trying to adjust to the dark. Loki immediately dropped his arms from around her, whirling around defensively, making sure she was at his back. "And why aren't I freezing? It's still fucking Winter, last time I checked!"

"Darcy," Loki said slowly, looking around, taking in the darkened valley below them, the bejeweled stars above them. There was something distinctly familiar about the position of those stars...

"No," Darcy gasped, and Loki nodded slowly.

"Area 86."

Omg, I hope this chapter was both long enough and not too long...I'm so sorry about the ridiculously long wait! Excuses excuses excuses...I have a million of 'em! Even if I go years between updates, I promise this story will be going strong until I'm finished telling it. So just be patient with me! As ever, feedback is love. Thank you for your continued reading and support!

Lyrics from Beautiful With You by Halestorm.