A/N: So I re-read my old version of this chapter and realized it didn't fit in with the light-hearted tone of the previous chapters, so I completely rewrote it so its less angsty and I think it's much better now. Hopefully. If you did like the angsty conversation about the war Neville and Hermione had, I may turn that deleted scene into the seed of another hermione/neville story, but not anytime soon because I am writing some other stories that need to be updated and I will be writing a more steamy Neville oneshot about his postgrad days. Anyways, like always, thanks for reading/following/favoriting and like always reviews are highly appreciated like liquid silver or gold. Special thanks to guest, onyx obsidian and Chelsea sharpe for reviewing the last chapter before the rewrite!


~o~

Neville arrived back at their house to find Hermione already dressed and waiting for them to go out. Her hair was done up and she wore a red dress and heels as she diced up strawberries and churned homemade icecream with her wand. He had to do a double-take on the picturesque domestic scene. He was an extremely lucky man. Hermione always made the most delicious homemade food though it didn't look or smell like she had cooked dinner. He threw his work bag on the counter and then snuck up behind her to give her a kiss on the neck.

"Hello, darling. What are you making?"

"Just a snack." She pressed one of the strawberries into her mouth and he felt himself getting an instant boner.

"Let me have a taste," he said and kissed the strawberry from her lips. "Delectable. As always."

"You forgot our anniversary," Hermione reminded him.

"I did not."

"Oh, you so did." She laughed. "If not for the Remembrall—"

"Okay fine." He grinned and pulled back her long hair to bare her neck. "But trust me, I'm more than making it up for it." He lowered his lips to nip at her neck. "I'm going to have you squirming tonight," he whispered. "Did I tell you you look ravishing? I could take you on the counter right now." He nibbled at the lobe of her ear.

Hermione looked like she could take on his Mimbulus Mimbletonia right now but patiently inquired about their dinner. "While that would be nice," she groaned in between kisses. "I am a bit peckish for a proper meal."

"A bit peckish?" he teased and threatened to tickle her. "Only a bit?"

"Okay, okay. More than a little, I'm ravenous," Hermione said and stared up at him coyly. "But that can wait until later. I already got dressed to go out."

"I know you look stunning. Can't keep my hands off you." He paused to give her another once over; she wore the red dress they'd bought while going to Paris last spring. It was French and chic. Givenchy or something. She would be the belle of the ball when they went out. "Don't worry, I have reservations," he said with a dash of pride.

"Really, on such short notice?"

Neville shook his head and adjusted his tie, exchanging the black robes from his work with a nicer, trendier blue shirt with a flick of his wand.

"C'mon, give me some credit. You'd be surprised at the doors the Longbottom name can still open."

"You forget I am a Longbottom too."

Neville gave her a dashing smile. "Yes, you are. The Perfect-bottom." He placed his hand over her cherished behind and gave it a squeeze. They both giggled. Every so often he still made dorky puns like this; it was sort of their thing to out-dork each other whenever they could. Bad puns remained a favourite. They were still very much the same dorks who fell in love in Herbology over lame plant puns, despite both being really attractive and shiny on the surface now.

"C'mon, after you," he grabbed her hand and led them towards the Floo network.

He had managed to get a last minute reservation at the snazziest, new restaurant in Diagon Alley "Chez Magique". He held open the door for Hermione as they walked into the dimlit restaurant and saw several men's jaws drop as they caught sight of his wife all done up in her little red dress. Hermione truly was a head turner now in her twenties. Odd how, despite being just as naturally pretty, in Hogwarts the brunnette hadn't garnered as much attention. Well, pity on them, Neville saw what was good and grabbed it. He had no regrets.

The same could not be said of her ex-best friends. Harry Potter was happily married to Ginny, but the redhead was quickly becoming an overbearing, younger model of her mother; she even began to boss the boy-who-lived on what he could do or who he could hang out with. Control freak central. Neville doubted that Ginny put out often either or was as fun as Hermione was.

Meanwhile, Ron Weasley had been in a string of dysfunctional, short-lived relationships with witches who ended up more interested in his fame and wallet than in him...Ron even told Neville at their wedding day that he regretted not making a move and being too immature to see Hermione as more than a friend just because she didn't walk around wearing short skirts like Lavendar Brown or Fleur.

"I guess I never realized how spectacular she was, we took her for granted," Ron had said.

"I almost did too. But I quickly came to my senses."

"You're a lucky man."

"I know," Neville said with none too little modesty. He truly was the luckiest man alive to be marrying her.

Even as he sat across from her tonight on their two-year anniversary, he had to keep pinching himself, that this absolute sex kitten and dream girl was his wife. She had beauty and brains...and who would've guessed that either Neville Longbottom or Hermione Granger, the bookworms, would become the swans they were now.

It was one of the perks of being a proffessional young adult and a heir that neither of them had to worry about money ever again. He didn't have to live off Gran's monthly allowance as a kid, he had inherited the whole lot. And his job as a Hogwarts Professor paid much more than he ever got from any of the Botany research he worked at as a grad student. Hermione had an equally well paying job at the Ministry and was working her way up. Two incomes and no kids yet, they were both quite spoiled. Yet they probably deserved the happiness after everything they had gone through in the war. They were both Order-of-Merlin war heroes.

He didn't mind spoiling his wife. She was a war hero. And a damn right saint.

"Is this an alright anniversary, so far?"

"It's pretty good considering you didn't even remember til a few hours ago."

He grinned and took another sip of his red wine. "You know I like to treat you."

"What is it exactly that you have planned for later?"

"Don't worry about it. You'll find out soon enough."

Hermione's eyebrows knit together, her mind obviously trying to figure out any clues she might've missed, but Neville just smirked and refused to give her any more hints. "Just wait."

After racking up a high bill drinking various elf wines and cocktails and tasting every little appetizer and desert because everything was to-die-for delicious...they decided to call it a night and go home.

"Whoever the chef was is a genius," Hermione said as they left. Neville noticed she had eaten like a starving warthog tonight...but decided not to burst her bubble.

"Would you believe the chef was Seamus?"

"Seamus? As in Seamus Finnigan? No way."

Neville nodded. "Yeah, he finally found his talents. He's doing really well now."

"Wow. I would never have expected that." Hermione began to list off how everything about the restaurant, from the colourful drinks to the antique decor gaslights to the beautiful porcelain plates had been absolutely stunning. He loved to see her happy. But even more, Neville wanted to see her satisfied in a very different way.

"C'mon, let's go home." He wrapped his arms around her back and hugged her into his chest before apparating them both.

~o~

Back in their manor, Neville got out a vial of contraceptive potion and handed it to Hermione. She took the potion at once and they both hurried upstairs to their bedroom.

Hermione was her usual over analytic self again as she lay with relief on the silk bedspread and sighed. She took off her heels and rubbed at her feet.

"So...you can't give me one hint what the surprise is?"

"Can't you stop guessing for once? You'll find out in literally minutes." He removed his tie and then unbuttoned his shirt.

He felt his wife's eyes watch his every motion. "It's not some weird sexual surprise is it?"

Neville coaxed an eyebrow. "Why would you want it to be?"

The tip of her tongue flicked playfully over her top lip. "I don't know...would anything you do surprise me anymore? We've done just about everything possible."

"Hold that thought one minute," Neville said and removed his shirt completely. He went to their bathroom and thought 'well it's now or never'. She'd probably just laugh. With his wand, he selected the appropiate tune to play on the radio. Then he quickly changed out of his remaining slacks and socks. Then slipped off his underwear and slipped on a faux fur loincloth that covered his manhood.

He was Tarzan now.

It was pretty lame but he hadn't thought of another way to surprise her for their anniversary in time.

Luckily, already hearing the music, Hermione had begun to giggle and that was a good sign.

He took in a deep breath and walked out into their bedroom wearing the loincloth.

Hermione's jaw immediately dropped. Her eyes raked over his muscular form all laid bare for her except the teasingly tight and small piece of fabric over his substantial personhood.

"Merlin!" Hermione covered her mouth. "You're Tarzan aren't you?"

Neville nodded sheepishly and his cheeks couldn't help reddening. "Yes." He coughed and added. "At your service."

It helped that he had a six-pack and well-muscled arms so that he at least looked the part.

He pounded his chest like a jungle man. "Me Tarzan. You Jane."

"Oh, Merlin," Hermione kept stammering. She either really liked this surprise or didn't; Neville couldn't tell which yet.

Her hand was still over her mouth. "You do actually look exactly like Tarzan."

"Do you like it?"

"Do I like it?" she repeated his words. She immediately got up off the bed and walked up to him.

Hermione ran a hand from his rippling abs to his loincloth, felt the faux animal fur, and then ran her fingertips back up to his face. "Actually, this is perfect." Neville could see now that she couldn't hide her enthusiasm or keep her eyes off him. "Thank you."

"I was going to get you jewellry or flowers at the last minute, but then I got this crazy thought. A student sorta gave me the idea."

"A student suggested this?!"

"Well, not exactly. Get this, there's a rumour I like to swing from my manor's chandeliers like Tarzan."

"Oh we have to try that now."

"Yes, we do."

"Your gran would be rolling around in her grave."

"Oh, absolutely. What has the Longbottom family come to?"

"An absolute dirty disgrace."

"Perfectbottom."

Neville grinned and threw her effortlessly over his broad shoulders. He patted her bottom and carried her back over to the bed. "No more talk."

He was about to throw her down on the bed when Hermione said, "Wait. I have an idea. How about we go back down to the kitchen counter and resume where we left off earlier?"

Neville grinned as he carried her down, still over his shoulder, to their large kitchen downstairs.

He set her down on the sleek marble countertop, which luckily, was amply large for setting lots of pans, pots, fruitbowls, food...and bodies.

"Is this more to your liking?" he asked. He shoved the fruitbowl away from her to clear some space for his arms on either side of her.

Hermione grabbed her wand and sent the bowl of strawberries and ice cream she made earlier into her hands.

"This was my own surprise."

She dipped a finger into the bowl and licked at it.

Neville leaned in again to kiss and taste the delicious mixture off her lips again. He was hard as a Tentacula.

"You're exquisite."

"So are you." She appreciatively tugged at the loincloth before using her wand to untie it so he was fully bare. "Come over here," she said and dipped her hand into the bowl, this time getting a large strawberry covered in cream that she seductively licked at.\

.

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~O~

A/N: The end or one more chapter? What do you think? Lemon?

also I think neville and hermione are the type of late bloomers that much more enjoy their 20s and adulthood than they did their teenage years where they might've been more limited, put in a box by others and maybe missed out on some of the fun because they were both so academic and into other hobbies.