Two days later, and The Dead Men, minus Ravel, stood before the Elders again. Elder Oo looked distressed, Elder Milo looked angry on a whole new scale and Grand Mage Sorrows looked like she had murder on her mind.
"I have bad news." She said.
"What, you mean worse than Hades wanting us dead, Macon wanting us dead, three people who were dead are no longer dead? And that we only have three months left?" Skulduggery asked.
"Yes. Valkyrie Cain is to be tried. If we win, she will carry on as normal. If not then her memories will be erased." China said curtly.
"Who the hell is trying her?!"
"The Supreme Council."
"Good God, they're still a thing?"
"What do we do about Ghastly, Anton and Saracen?"
"Hide them."
"Oh, thanks."
"We can't show you guys, not now. You need representatives. Two."
"Skulduggery."
"I figured."
"And Ezra."
"What? Why me?"
"Because you're good at making people feel sorry."
"When is the trial?"
She hesitated.
"Today."
Valkyrie felt her gut twist.
Hours later, they were gathered in court room deep in the sanctuary that Valkyrie didn't know existed. They had been instructed to change into the appropriate attire and Valkyrie felt ridiculous. Skulduggery was holding her hand, and Ezra was rambling on about stories and experiences from the past 400 years. Usually Valkyrie would tell her to shut up, but today her bell-like voice sounded good. It kept her own voices away. Anton, Ghastly and Saracen were sitting in China's office, watching this from there. Two men who looked remarkably similar to each other were seated to the left of Valkyrie. The judge was a bored looking African. The Jury was African, Irish, Australian and American. It was a good mix. Valkyrie knew none of them. The judge did the hammer thing and Valkyrie couldn't help smirk. She had always wanted to see a gavel in action in real life.
"The Trial of Valkyrie Cain, lead by representatives Sean and John Loose, Ezra Bloom and Skulduggery Pleasant in that order, to erase Miss Cain's memory begins now." The bored African said in a bored voice. Sean Loose walked up in front of everyone.
"Valkyrie Cain is a murderer."
Valkyrie felt Skulduggery bristle beside her and Ezra quietly inhale.
"She discovered her true name, Darquesse, and destroyed half of Ireland with it. If she wasn't stopped, then she would have gone on to destroy the rest of the world. Her friends say Darquesse is gone, sure. But I think they're too blinded by this girl's sarcastic charm. They're stupidity cannot be the cause of our world's demise.
Miss Cain disappeared for five years. Where did she go? Her friends didn't know, her own partner didn't know. She could have killing, or learning how to be more like Miss Cain.
This is my case to erase Miss Cain's memories." Then he sat down.
"I don't much like being called an idiot." Skulduggery whispered in her ear. Valkyrie's hand was shaking and she slipped it in Ezra's to hide the trembling. Ezra wordlessly accepted and squeezed it for comfort.
John Loose was next and was an even bigger asshole.
"Valkyrie Cain should be killed, in my opinion, along with her friends and band of morons they call The Dead Man. All of them should be arrested and shot in the head. They think they are superior to all of us because of their 'skills'. I don't care about those. A murderer is a murderer and Valkyrie is that exactly. We don't allow the death penalty, tragically, so we should erase her memories." And with that he sat down.
"Short and sweet, gotta love that." Dexter said, leaning forward from his seat on the front row.
"Miss Ezra Bloom, you're up." Ezra nodded, brushed off her skirt and walked to the front of the room with her head high.
"I've known Valkyrie for a little over six years. And in that time I have learned that she would do anything, absolutely anything, for her family, her partner and her friends. I've seen Darquesse, and experienced the agony she can cause. I've been in her head, and saw how she would kill me if given the chance. She was ruthless and unaware that she was ruthless. And Valkyrie Cain stopped her.
As Mr Loose said, if Darquesse hadn't of been stopped, then the world would be in shatters. But it was stopped, because Valkyrie Cain helped to stop her. I see her as a hero and if this is how the Sanctuary treat heroes then perhaps it's time for a career change.
My memories were gone for a hundred years. I was lost and scared, and I woke up every day knowing that something was wrong but not knowing what that something is. When my fiancé walked by me, I didn't know it was him.
My memories were taken as a form of torture, and we should not torture Valkyrie Cain for something someone who is the realm of the Faceless Ones did. Thank you." Ezra said, and quickly went to sit down.
"Mr Skulduggery Pleasant."
Skulduggery straightened his already straight tie and briskly walked to the from of the room.
"I've never been very good at playing nice, none of the Band Of Morons have, however I must say Miss Cain is the best of us. Yes, she had a little slip learning her true name but that' not exactly her fault. She fixed it, problem solved… Again.
Looking at this from your point of view, can you really afford to lose Valkyrie Cain?"
"Yes." John said. "We have Ezra now."
"And those are totally different skill sets, aren't they? I wouldn't dream of comparing Miss Cain to Miss Bloom. Equally skilled, of course. But we need both of them in this line of work, and now that we have them you want dismiss Cain for something she isn't reasonable for? Ludacris. You're just upset that your Supreme Council is redundant." And with that, Skulduggery went and sat down.
There was then a thirty minute interval for the Jury to decide. Ezra was chewing her lip and bouncing her leg, her forever empathetic self. Valkyrie's hand was violently shaking. Skulduggery was silent as he sat next to her. Ezra disappeared then came back with coffees for everyone, which Valkyrie slurped down in two big gulps.
They were called back in and Valkyrie stood at the front.
The Judge banged his gavel. "Guilty."
Valkyrie felt her own eyes widened and looked at her friends. Ezra had tears in her eyes, and Dexter was frowning, not sure if he heard that correctly. Skulduggery had gone very, very still. Then Ezra grabbed Dexter and Skulduggery and air-walked to Valkyrie. Skulduggery grabbed her as someone screamed "Get them!"
They air walked to China's office, got the rest of the Dead Men then appeared in a dark, concrete building.
