"So to review on our project of taking care of a child," Ms. Bitters said, "can anyone tell me why is it that we shouldn't have kids in the first place?"
She looked around the room with the kids remaining silent. Her eyes then laid on Zim, to which he was seen with his face resting on the table and softly snoring.
"Zim."
"Wait, cold unfeeling metal arm, I'll be awakeinasecon..." the green person mumbled in his slumber and continued snoring again. Ms. Bitters snarled.
"ZIM!"
"Uh-HAHOOO WHA?!" He jumped awake and looked across the classroom frantically for a moment. Once he relaxed, he looked at his teacher.
"Oh. Hi, Ms. Bitters. Are we starting class now?"
"Class started TWO HOURS ago."
"Two hours, are you sure?"
"Do you think I would be joking?"
He sat still gazing at her.
"...maybe?"
She squinted.
"Sleep one more time and you'll see what it's like sleeping in the detention room."
"But I couldn't have slept. I don't REQUIRE sleep. It's just not possible."
"Then maybe you should think twice before you decide to stay up late at night."
"That's not what I-"
"No more excuses! Now tell me. Why is it that we shouldn't we have children in the first place?"
He pondered about it.
"Uh...cause some babies might end up being space monsters or meat?"
Ms. Bitters looked at him for a short while.
She looked at the other students,
"Any other suggestions?"
The kids sat still not answering.
Ms. Bitters grew impatient,
"Well?"
One kid raised their hand.
"Yes?"
"Because a baby might steal something from you while you sleep and eat it?"
"Correct," Ms. Bitters said, "in fact, let me tell you all a similar story that happened to me. I once wanted to be a great babysitter. At the same time..."
Zim tried his best to listen to her, but it was difficult to focus on anything. He never felt this weak in his life. But it was a different kind of weak. A feeling of weakness that urges him to sleep and as far as he can tell, irkens don't require sleep. Not to mention that he feel his squeedlyspooch uncomfortably grumbling here and there, causing a sense of nausea for no apparent reason.
A week has passed since he inserted the other irkens blood into his body. Are these suppose to be symptoms as a result from this? If so, he wonders if this is how suppose to be like. Just as he was thinking of this, his organs suddenly tighten, causing him to cover his mouth in surprise. He got out of his chair and rushed out of the classroom.
The teachers stopped lecturing just to watch him rush out of the room. The room went quiet for a bit.
"Well then," Ms. Bitters turned back to the students, "as I was saying, it was until that one fateful day when the baby-"
"Wait a second!" Dib stood up from his chair narrowing, "how come Zim is allowed to go to the bathroom without taking a hall pass?"
The teacher looked at the glasses boy.
"Clearly he was close to vomiting. And one last thing I need is for a student to vomit in my class. So going to the bathroom without a hall pass in order to throw up is allowed."
"How come you never asked us that?" Dib asked in confusion.
"You never asked."
"Oooooooo," the kid moaned, "my stomach hurts. I think I'm gonna throw up. Maybe it's best if I go to the-"
"I can tell whether or not a student is lying," she told him, "now stay seated."
His acting went away and he moaned in defeat.
Dib however was having difficult time looking back at the lecture. Zim was onto something and he can feel it in his guts. What if he just rushed out of the classroom as an excuse to fire a rocket into space before sending it down to nuke the city? What if he's planning on stealing all the adults living on Earth and have them do chicken dances in order to hatch a space monster?
Whatever it is, there was no way he was going to ignore whatever Zim is doing in the public bathroom. Dib turns and raises his hand,
"Ms. Bitters, May I use the restroom."
She looked at him. Then squinted. The glasses kid sweated nervously, feeling the concern of her disapproving increasing as the seconds rolled by.
After a minute of squinting, her eyes soften.
"Fine, But make it quick."
Dib smiled in relief as he went over to grab the hall pass and rushed out of the classroom.
—-
He can hear a familiar voice gagging the moment he entered the bathroom. Already knowing who it is, he went to the only bathroom stall that was half closed and kicked it open.
"ZIM!"
The green kid-sized alien was kneeling in front of the toilet. He coughed out the last amount of vomit and sickly looked at him.
"Holdoncanyougivemeamoment?"
Dib felt his stomach get a bit queasy, realizing that he really wasn't faking the sickness.
"Uh. Sure, take your time."
He closed the stall and waited beside the sink as he heard him vomit again. After a minute went by, the toilet flushed. Zim gets out of the stall and looked at him mumbling,
"Where's the water fountain?"
"Right outside of the bathroom, at the left side of the entrance."
"Ok thanks," he left the bathroom and waited again, having to check his watch and make sure his "bathroom break" isn't lasting too long for Ms. Bitters to notice. Zim comes back to the bathroom finally felling relieved,
"That's much better."
"You good now?"
"Yes I'm good now."
"Ok."
Dib clears his throat before dramatically pointing at him,
"ZIM! What are you up to this time?!"
"...throwing up."
"Throwing up what? Acids? An infection that will plague the whole country? Did you place Minimoose in the toilet while you were vomiting as a distraction? Are they going to nuclear bomb the whole city-?!"
"Ok ok ok," Zim halted him, "first off, I would never put Minimoose on my vomit. I'm not the type of villain who mistreats his servants like that. And second, none of them aren't my plan."
"Then...what's your plan?"
"Trying to create a smeet."
"A smeet?"
He squinted,
"In irken language, a baby."
"Making a baby...Wait. Are you saying your vomiting was-"
"Oh wait hang on. Let me make sure fertilizing was successful."
He takes a floating device out and commands,
"Floaty Computer, scan me to see if there is any other life form beside me."
The device scanned his body.
"ANOTHER LIFE FORM IDENTIFIED: AN UNHATCHED NATURAL IRKEN."
Zim blinked in surprise.
"Huh...so it really did work."
He suddenly glances at Dib, realizing he's still watching.
"I mean OFCOURSE it would work! Zim's experiments never fail!"
The floating device goes back into his PAK. But Dib was putting the puzzle together until it clicked him.
"Wait...you got yourself pregnant?"
"I'm not pregnant," the alien corrected, "I have an egg in my stomach that is developing a smeet inside and I will lay it once it's close to hatching."
"That...sort of still sounds like pregnancy."
"Pssh, you still have a hard time understanding my people, Dib."
"No I mean, what else can you call it? And how is it possible? Who's the mother...or...father if that's even the possibility?"
"Don't know, don't care. All that matter is that I'm the sole reason this smeet is about to be born. And with a smeet about to be born natural after who knows what long, the tallest HAVE to acknowledge me."
"Did they ask you to get pregnant?"
"No, but they should atleast see great potential in it. In fact, even I have no clue what it'll turn out to be. Maybe it'll help me take over the world with its...well...whatever it may be."
"That's...ridiculous," Dib narrows, "And what if it doesn't WANT to conquer the world? What if it just wants to be nurture and loved?"
"Don't be stupid big head," Zim narrowed back, "as far as your study goes, irkens don't need love and they never should. They just do nothing but make us weak, distracted and helpless. And all this smeet needs is to fulfill their master's fulfillment."
"Whatever," the human said in irritation, "why should I ever bother with what you do? It is your baby after all."
"It's a smeet," Zim corrected and then looked closely at Dib's expression.
"Huh...I must have successfully ticked you off after all."
"Ah-eh-What do you think?!" He was starting to loose his nerves, "I know you're low, but I didn't think you were THAT low."
Zim glanced about the room.
"Wait. Do you really wanna fight here? Right now? While school is going on?"
Dib just rolls his eyes and starts leaving bathroom.
"Uh, Wait," the alien called, "where you going?"
"I'm not in a mood to fight today," he muttered as he opened the door.
"So you're just going to let me continue my amaz-" Dib closes the door behind him "-and he's gone."
He stared at it for a while. Then his eyebrows furrowed, disappointed he wasn't able to challenge his enemy today. He honestly never made him mad enough to make him leave the room, which was something he didn't think was possible. But even so...
He shrugged.
"Humans."
—
Zim comes home looking unsatisfied as he lets the computer take off his disguise. As much as the nausea has settled down for now, he was still not happy with fact he wasn't able to fight Dib today.
"MASTER!"
He blinked in alert and saw Gir running so fast towards him, he was certain he will bombard unto his abdomen.
"YOUR'E HO-"
Something suddenly clicked just before Gir embraced, causing him to smack him away. The robot skidded a bit back and tumbled on the ground.
There was a tensed and defensive expression on the alien's face until it faded and realized what he did as he watched the SIR unit sit up and start sniffling.
"Oh woah, Gir."
He quickly went over to help him up.
"Hey, are you ok?" Zim asked, his tone having a sound of slight concern.
Gir just kept sobbing,
"I miss my nachos-HOW WAS SCHOOL TODAY?!" The robot let out a huge smile again.
Zim gave an unamused.
"Yeah, you're ok."
Gir blinked when he noticed something.
"Do you need me to tuck you into bed?"
Zim sighed and he rubbed one of his eyes tiredly.
"Not now, maybe later. There's something I must do first."
He stood up from his kneeled position.
"Call everyone to the living room. I have an important announcement to make."
"Awww now?" The robot frowned, "I was hoping we would watch Angry Monkey Show together."
Oh how it would have been nice to relax on the couch right now. But anything related to his duty comes first.
"Now, Gir."
The robot moaned, but accepted. he prances off to tell the others.
—-
"Now THAT is one good of a soda!" The robotic dad exclaimed holding out a bottle of oil, "would you like to try to some, son?!"
"It's healthy for you!" Robomom said.
"No 'mom and dad'," Zim pressed his hips in irritation, "I don't. And careful not to spill that on the couch! I already got the computer to clean up the base."
"OOO!" Gir, sitting on the couch next to the other robots, raised his hand, "I WANT SOME!"
"Here you go, little guy!" Robodad handed it to him. Gir went ahead and started suckling it in peaceful pleasure like an infant.
Zim looked about,
"And WHERE is minimoose?"
Just as he asked, he heard a car pull in and its engine shutting g off . And a few seconds later, a door flew open, showing a floating moose come in and closing it behind them with their telekinetic ability.
"And where have you been?!" Zim crosses his arms, "shouldn't you be doing anything besides driving off the base like that?"
"Nyah!"
"Woah, really?" Zim looked in surprise, "did you get her phone number?"
"Nyah..." He squeaked frowning.
"...Oh. Well...I'm sure you can get it next time. But for now, sit down. The meeting is about to start."
He waited until his youngest servant rested on the couch besides Gir.
"Is everyone here now?" He looked about again, "where's the computer?"
"I'm always present," the computer said in a tone as if it's obvious.
"Good, were all here...huh...I don't think I ever gathered anyone here since Minimoose's arrival. Gives me quite a deja vu feeling."
The robots all quietly stared at him. After some awkward silence, the Invader cleared his throat.
"Anyways, I am pleased to announce that we'll be adding a new sidekick to the base. They-"
"OOOOOOO! WHERE IS IT WHERE IS IT WHERE IS IT WHERE IS IT?!" Gir jumped excitedly.
"As of right now, it is right now in an egg growing inside of me and-"
"Nyah?" Minimoose asked.
"Ugh!" Zim groaned, "why is everyone thinking I'm pregnant? I'm not! I just have an egg incubating in me!"
"YOURE HAVING A BABY?!"
"No, Gir it's not."
"Actually by my calculation, you pretty much are pregnant and the servant growing inside you is a smeet, not a baby. Which makes you a father now."
"Ok," Zim looked up at the ceiling narrowing, "first off, what gives you the right to spill that information? Second, thank you for not calling it a baby. And third, don't call me a dad. Being a parent only make irkens a softie."
"But you are-"
"Ok, meeting's over. Everybody go back to your duty."
The roboparents and Minimoose scattered about. Zim sighed and went over to the couch. He can feel as if his body is crying in joy the moment he relaxed on the couch, something he thought was never possible. But here he is with this future servant within him draining his energy that not even his PAK can recharge.
He just hopes the two months go by quickly. He feels a light being hop onto the couch next to him, to which he already guessed who it is. But what caught him off guard was feeling a metal head rest on his belly. He looked down at the small figure.
"Gir, what are you doing now?"
"Mmm, trying to see if the baby says hello to me."
Zim exhaustedly rubs his eyes again.
"Gir," he looks back at him, "as of right now, the bab-servant is just a tiny blob that may be a size of...well...maybe a peanut. It may not even have a mouth yet. So if your hoping to Atleast hear any sign of new life in there, you're probably just gonna hear my squeedlyspooch messing around with the food I ate. And maybe even my heart pulsing."
Gir just continued cuddling his master replying,
"I love the sound of that..."
The alien awkwardly gazed at him.
"You're a creep."
"I know I am," the robot responded back happily.
"Look," Zim tried to relax again, "just, don't disturb my slumber. No noises, no squirming a lot, I just need peace and quiet-"
Gir yawned loudly and snuggled up with him more.
"...I'll take that as a yes."
Zim yawns as well and let his body feel as if it was sinking into the couch.
Eventually, he got use the small weight of the SIR unit sleeping besides him and he let the slumber fully bury his thought.
