Most of the time since being shoved out of Dana's room had been spent in a low orbit to look for a good landing zone away from the colony cities. Possibly one of the most tedious parts about flying the ship. And the control scheme was one she had next to no familiarity with at all.
Zariba had far too many places in mind as to where they could go.
Dana's near infinite patience was the only thing keeping her from picking out the next location at random. "Anything look good Teegs? I think we just passed a few forests not too long ago."
A silent shrug was all she got in reply.
"Okay, even taking into consideration everything that's up with your head, this is not like you." She awkwardly pushed through the tiny corridor into the co-pilot's seat beside Maarani. It didn't take long to work out that she was not actually trying to remain focused on flying the vessel. "Teegs, if there's a real reason behind your objection to wearing robes, please tell me now."
Maarani finally decided to speak up after Dana had gone through the whole ordeal. "I don't need special clothes for meditation. I can concentrate just fine in these. Unless the Jedi really have become a military and they'll force me to comply with the dress code…"
Dana zipped right back into the chair. "What the hell are you on about now? I really don't know where your issues come from sometimes-"
The answer clicked over in her head. Again, she had to calm herself before continuing. "You don't want to go back to military training. All that frustration stems from what I mentioned back there." She reached across the small space between them. "I'll be there to help you discuss the matter with Jayden. There is still a lot that the three of us need to coordinate on."
"Oh look, a very convenient giant waterfall with grassy peninsula that's flat enough to land on."
Dana shook her head. Pushing for Maarani to open up would just make her stubborn again. Exactly what would impede teaching her to achieve a state of calm.
There was a lot of nervous murmuring from Maarani while they closed in for the landing. Even after touching down on the no longer pristine grass, she was clearly nervous about stability. After a solid minute of silence, during which nothing else occurred, she lifted her hands away from the controls. No sudden subsidence. No blaring warnings about a safety measure she forgot to check off. Most importantly, no control panels exploding in her face.
She waited for Dana to make her way outside before moving from her seat. Zariba was still changing into her attire for the lesson in quite possibly the most claustrophobic room she had ever seen. So far, she had yet to see the set itself.
In the meantime, Dana was taking the opportunity to look around the peninsula environment. The sheer cliffs that ran down around the grass surface were slightly worrying at first, but the sight of the cascading waterfall just a hundred metres away took her mind off the drop. Her only real concern was the apparent lack of wildlife that could help with the lesson itself. But it was not worth asking Maarani to spend another hour looking for a new site.
When Zariba emerged from the vessel, Dana was presented with a unique opportunity to talk with her alone. Without Maarani there to be any kind of influence. She waited until the Twi'lek had moved far enough out into the open before approaching her in a casual manner.
"Anything she hasn't told you about us yet?"
Zariba shook her head with a soft smile.
Dana's arms crossed over her chest. She was trying to maintain the casual attitude, but it wasn't quite so simple given what she had to say. "That include the fact that she's an empath, that her emotional state can have an impact on other Force sensitives? I really am just concerned that it could affect you badly since you haven't had formal training."
"I'm fine. I know how to block it out." Zariba's eyes wandered around as she noticed the Jedi trying to get a read on her. It was quite difficult to keep her entire body in check. A distraction was needed. "What has she said of me?"
It worked as far as distractions went. Dana's focus changed to cherry-picking parts of the earlier conversations, not wanting to reveal too much about what they knew. "That your father hid you from the Force order on Ryloth, and from the Sith. And that you were quite decisive about her situation. It really is impressive that you picked out the source of her inner pain so quickly…"
She noted the brief look from Zariba. Awareness of the inquiry, while not that discreet, was still noteworthy. Her perception was definitely sharp.
"Maarani wanted me to help her. I could feel her heart reaching out. How could I say no?"
"Rather poetic way of putting it." Maarani was halfway down the short ramp when the other two looked to her. At that moment, she was conflicted between being stubborn around Dana, and actually trying to be well behaved for Zariba.
After odd looks from both, she settled for the latter.
Dana was more confused by the robes Maarani had apparently settled on. "Off-black?"
"It's called navy. They don't have a colour called 'starfighter'."
Zariba was quick to be the voice of positivity. "I think it suits well. Shows off the figure." She prodded Maarani's side in a deliberate way to make her feel embarrassed. As expected, it helped to take off the defensive edge. "Better than earthy colours. Or greys. There's too many boring metal colours."
Dana shook her head before starting her search for an ideal location for them to work with. There was a surprisingly rough ground layer beneath the lush grass. She didn't need yet another excuse for Maarani to start complaining.
After searching ahead for a while longer, she settled for a reasonably level plateau and waved the two Twi'lek over. "Pick a good spot, reasonably apart from each other, and face towards me."
Once they had done as instructed, she spread her feet out to shoulder width. Her hands raised up to about a metre from either side of her head, fingertips pointed upward, then twisted at the wrist to match the flow of the wind. Her head also turned to follow its path to the distant horizon. "First thing they teach you upon becoming a padawan after completing the initiate stage is how to control your breathing. Oxygen gives us life, just like the energy of the Force. Obviously you don't inhale the Force, but letting it flow through the body is somewhat similar. There is a definite give and take."
"I thought this was about helping me cut down on the mood swings?"
Just for that moment, Dana had to smile. "Patience is the path to understanding the Force. While moments of passion can lead to great miracles of healing, it is far more likely to result in great acts of destruction. Patience is key to mastering both, and to choosing the right path to follow." She turned her feet towards the horizon, the rest of her body twisted to face it fully as well. Her arms moved down in front of her stomach, accompanying her deep exhale.
"Jedi typically withhold their emotions in life for a good reason. It is easy to be angry at an enemy, to hate them, revile them. It is much harder to forgive, understand, and even love them." She stretched her hands out in front of her head, flat against the sky as if she were pushing against a wall. "Without temperament, caution, and poise, even the purest of emotions like love can twist down into the dark side. However, someone filled with even the worst of emotions like hate can still be turned to the light."
Maarani dragged her left cheek down with a drawn out groan. Given what she had been told by Dana, Utan and Sereti, she was beginning to grasp where the lesson was going. "Since I'm an empath, I can muck around with emotions. And since the Sith rely on emotions for power…" Her mouth went dry as something ominous occurred to her. "Is that how my mother was pulled from the dark side? By my father using his powers to get at her?"
Dana's lips remained firmly shut. Her gaze was slowly shifting between Maarani, who was clearly distraught over her realization, and Zariba, who looked strangely unfazed.
She broke from her posture to face Maarani once she felt she was ready. "Your father and I, as well as a few others taught many of the former Sith to temper their emotions, nothing more. They came to us, and we helped."
"You don't look sixty years old."
"That's because I'm not sixty years old."
"Maarani don't be rude. Dana looks lovely, whatever her age is." Zariba flashed a grin at Maarani, who was looking even more flustered. She could hear Dana sighing while presumably rolling her eyes at the compliment.
When the two Twi'lek began to settle again, Dana returned to the posture she had been in last. "Getting back to the lesson, emotional control through patience starts with focus. The best way to achieve constant focus is to pick something neutral, and think about it whenever an emotion begins to surface." She glanced over at the pair as they immediately looked to each other. "Girlfriends are not emotionally neutral."
The two Twi'lek giggled before looking to the environment around them.
"When you find something to focus on, stare at it. Study it, contemplate its existence. When you need to focus, the only thing in your mind is that object. Nothing else matters." She returned to her original posture, arms out to either side, then brought both hands together in a meditative gesture. "You exist, the object exists, and the Force exists. There is no harm, no fear, no danger. You are alone in the void. The Force flows between you and the object, drawing away passion, leaving behind peace. You breathe in, the Force breathes out.
All three took deep inhales, holding it for the exact same amount of time, then exhaled in the same motion.
"Anger cannot blind you, sadness cannot slow you. Bliss cannot leave you ignorant, awe cannot distract you." Dana slowly dropped to her knees, resting both hands on them as she lowered her head in deep thought. "Hatred for another will never triumph over love for them."
Maarani's fist clenched at that. That was blatantly referring to Masaka, yet again. Dana wasn't ever going to leave that alone.
"Hope will never fall to the shadow of despair. The Force guides us in all things. We are its protectors, and it protects us. A will that is pure of mind, peaceful at heart, and one with the Force can achieve anything it is set to." She looked to Maarani one last time before settling into her full meditative state. "A Jedi loves the life of the universe above all else. We act for the good of all."
The brief flicker of anger faded from Maarani's mind while she knelt down as well. She wasn't ready to forgive Masaka by any stretch. But, as always, Dana was ultimately looking out for her best interests. No matter how unattainable they felt.
She took in another deep breath.
This time, her entry to the desolate dreamscape was abrupt. She felt herself physically falling to the thick dirt surface, as if pushed. The whole experience was scarily vivid now. Every little lump and rock that she had landed on brought noticeable pain with it.
"You continue to ignore my warning Maarani."
Maarani picked herself up off the ground and dusted her robes down. As expected, her 'other' self was standing there with a very disapproving expression. This time, she had a real rebuke.
"No shit I've not followed your warning. Every time I wake up from this, I instantly forget! Good work on that one!"
Shock was the last thing she expected from what was either an omnipotent being, or a manifestation of her subconscious. That was exactly the reaction she got.
"Azera had no difficulty in retaining the visions I sent her. I was certain you would-"
"Oh cut the crap already, whatever you are." Maarani took a cautious step towards the apparition. She certainly looked real, not even uncannily so. There was none of her own tattooing underneath the three distinctive marks. Not a complete copy of her current appearance then. "Every time you appear, hours just go by without me even noticing. By now I bet Dana and Zariba are desperately trying to wake me up."
The Lady shook her head at that. She reached her hand out and clasped Maarani's shoulder, giving her enough of a physical sensation to really take notice. "We communicate through the Force, you and I. In simple terms, you took longer to make sense of the thoughts I gave you. Now that the link has been strengthened, it will take far less time in the living world." Her hand fell away once she was certain that Maarani had come to accept what had been said. "When you restore your connection to the Force, these memories will be released to your conscious mind. At least that is what I am counting on."
Despite the seemingly real touch, and the explanation, Maarani was still airing towards her sarcastic tendencies. "Great, you could tell me how to do that, but I can't remember. And if I could remember, it wouldn't be useful anyway." She reached up to her head as it grew sore from her further pondering on the circular logic of it all. Being able to chat with an omnipotent being certainly had incredible tactical value, but it was completely worthless in actuality.
"Is there anything I can do from in here then? Such as making my body write a note? Something like 'Go find Azera Vass, she's the one.'"
The blank look she got said enough.
"This is stupid! Why even bother telling me anything then? By the time I remember it all, none of it will matter."
The Lady's head dipped down in sorrow. This time, the white marking on her face was softly glowing. "So many good people will die. I can only hope you kill most of the bad ones in retribution." She lifted her head back up, this time with the grey marking in full glow. "I must focus on protecting Azera until you cross paths with her. Guide her to the light, and she will guide you to the Force. Stay safe Tegama'Arani."
She released a long exhale.
"Impressive Teegs. You just held your breath for three hours."
Her eyes were slow to open. A weary feeling had spread through her body. Oxygen deprivation.
With a weak groan, she tipped over, landing on the grass with a thud. The world around her was spiralling out into oblivion. After some muffled exclamations, a green blur and a brown blur entered the mess that was her vision.
"Teegs, deep breaths okay?"
Maarani was already doing just that, but not by her by her own volition. Already, she knew it was another of her increasingly bothersome blackouts. When meditiating in the forest on Sarka, she had maintained some level of awareness throughout. There was no recollection of the past three hours at all.
Deep breath in.
The worries, concerns and suspicions that had clouded around her mind vanished in an instant.
Deep breath out.
Until that moment, she had been so preoccupied that the wonder of relaxing on a world she had never visited before was forgotten. Of the hundreds of worlds in the galaxy around them, it was definitely one of the more pleasant places to be. A true touch of peace that flowed throughout.
"Aww, you look cute like this. So quiet and-"
Maarani opened her eyes to glare at Zariba.
"Oh, right. Can't interrupt the moment."
"Bit late now."
This time, she was hoisted up onto her feet by a simple gesture from Dana. She knew the exact sensation that the Force had on the body from far too many climbing accidents back home.
Her last experience with it had been on Sarka.
Dana took hold of Maarani's hand before she collapsed yet again. "You made a connection to the Force, I felt it. Don't worry about holding on just yet." Her other hand moved to Maarani's facing shoulder, meant to reinvigorate her confidence further. "Progress is progress. You tried, and to a degree you succeeded."
Maarani's grin returned. "The effort is just as important as the result. Right?"
"Your memory is good, padawan." Dana glanced past her to where Zariba was giggling. "Mind heading back to the ship? Please? Private Jedi stuff to discuss."
Zariba gave a simple shrug, pausing on the way only to kiss Maarani's cheek before making her way back to the ship.
Once they were definitely alone, Dana looked back to the remaining Twi'lek. "There's been a change of plans, and I wanted to wait for the right time to tell you." Her expression had faded from the usual look of content that she had into slight dismay. "The Council is calling off the training schedule with friendly groups, because of the HK droids. Jayden and I will continue to train you, only we won't be staying in one location for long anymore."
"That sounds quite sensible actually." Maarani's expression also dipped down. For her, it was into hints of concern. "It's also nothing to be upset about, so there's something else to be said."
Dana nodded in a very solemn manner. Her lip began to tremble slightly. "Hours after we left Telos, Atris suffered a heart attack."
Maarani's lips parted in shock. The air in her lungs was drawn away.
"She didn't suffer any serious physical injuries from what I've been told, but…" Dana's lip continued to tremble, beyond what she could keep concealed. "They said there was some amount of brain damage. Located in a particular area we believe is associated with the Force in some way." She drew a shuddering breath to draw the pain she was feeling in. The following exhale released that and every part of her anguish out. "Without that connection, she isn't expected to see the end of the year."
In that moment, Maarani felt a new sensation of sorts. She could feel the gathering emotions in the Jedi before her, all packed in together underneath her calm exterior, and when they were dispelled into the void. Something had definitely tapped into her nature as an empath.
When it passed altogether, she stepped forward to pull Dana into a tight embrace. There was a slight tug in her chest when she felt her taking hold as well. "I'll take you back to Coruscant right now. Training can wait. Friends are always more important."
A soft smile formed across Dana's lips when she leaned back to make eye contact with Maarani. "I will see her again when the time is right, don't you worry. Right now, our concern is ensuring that you and Jayden start off on the right foot…"
She bit her tongue sharply. Even given her many, many years of experience, there were still far too many verbal slip-ups for a Jedi of her reputation. "Don't stare at her leg, or her face. And especially don't make any comment on them." Already, she could see smugness overtaking Maarani's face. One mistake that she was going to be held to for a while yet.
"What the hell did you do to your face?"
Maarani's lips turned a very pale blue from how tightly they were stretched across her teeth. On the one hand, she had just been rather rudely insulted. But on the other, it was by a woman almost twice her size, and covered almost entirely in heavy armour.
And yet, it was the armour itself that kept her from making a sarcastic remark despite the very real risk of getting punched across the room.
"I got it tattooed. Military regs are bullshit in that regard, and in every other way actually." She frowned a little when Jayden raised her unscorched eyebrow at that.
She's a Mandalorian, Maarani. Just be blunt, and she'll respect that…
After a sharp breath, she glared right up at her. "I don't want military training. Dana made me her padawan, so just treat me like another student."
Jayden lowered her eyebrow, looking over to Dana with a touch of confusion. With no clear answer in response, she looked back down to Maarani. "I believe that was the point to begin with. What happened to settling emotional turbulence, and more importantly random outbursts?"
"Sounds like I'm not the only-" A very slight trickle of blood seeped from Maarani's tongue from how hard she clamped down on it. It took several more deep breaths for her to feel ready enough to speak with respect again. "Dana told me about the impression she got from you, and I wanted to be clear that I want nothing more to do with anything military right from the start. That's all."
At that, Jayden finally broke from her cold stance. The disapproving look that had remained since first laying eyes on Maarani gave way to a brief moment of regret. In spite of the description she had been given by Omena, the Twi'lek before her was actually trying to make a good first impression. She herself was doing just the opposite, at least on a behavioural level.
She looked to Dana again with slight annoyance before stepping over to her left so she could sit down. It helped greatly in removing her imposing nature. "Dana, I would expect someone of your experience to know when someone is suffering from hyperspace fatigue. Quite frankly, I wasn't sure what to expect after our first conversation."
"Oh, I just assumed you were upset over leaving your husband alone again."
"That was still part of the issue, yes." She looked back to Maarani once more, who had shifted into a rather typical adolescent's posture of impatience. It didn't look right at all given her actual age. "And your tattooing was definitely not part of what I pictured you as. Rather bold."
For the first time since their return to the station, Maarani began to smile. "That was the idea. Besides, doesn't it make me look more threatening?" She put on her best 'angry' face to demonstrate. The reaction it got from Jayden was disappointing until she realized that the Mandalorian had probably seen far scarier things in her time.
"No. You shouldn't need to look threatening anyway. The lightsaber will be enough."
Dana made her way over from the kitchen at last to the pair staring at each other. "Our weapons are not something to be feared. They command respect, in whatever form that takes."
"I've heard that plenty enough, Dana. Sometimes, respect is not enough, and you need to provide some extra motivation to get what you need..."
"We're not thugs. At least we aren't on Coruscant anyway."
"Hello?" Maarani swallowed as both Jedi looked to her. At least it brought a swift end to the bickering that had started. "Maybe we can just alternate training days for now? We're all tired. I am at least anyway." She got up out of her seat and awkwardly slipped past the two. For once, she wasn't actually in any kind of mood for resting, but it was still better than being trapped in the middle of an argument she had little say in.
She hadn't seen Izan in a while, or Cecile for that matter.
