Kate was pretty sure she was going to die. If it wasn't by drowning, then it was going to be from the drop of that waterfall she saw approaching. She felt sad that it was going to end this way, but she knew that getting involved in being an Expendable could end in death. She just imagined it would be going down in a gunfight or something, not drowning. The backpack was bringing her down, she knew it, but she kept it on because it had the plans and detonators in it. She didn't want the bad guys to find them. Then again, they'd find them on her corpse anyway, and they'd be ruined from the water. Her brain wasn't really functioning properly at that moment. The water was freezing cold, and all her efforts went into not drowning, which was proving difficult when her arm was killing her from getting shot. Then, as if by a saving grace, a branch came upon her, and she automatically reached for it. She didn't know how strong it was or if it would even hold her for very long, but it would delay things for the moment. She was almost to the edge of the waterfall.
I'm not ready, she though. She wasn't ready to die. She had so much more she wanted to do.
And then, he was there. Somehow he was there, saving her again.
"Kate?" he said loudly. She opened her eyes, and she saw Liam was right there, holding onto the branch with her. She closed her eyes again. She was very cold.
"Kate, stay with me," Lee ordered. He grabbed her chin and gave her head a small shake, and she opened her eyes again. "Listen to me, this isn't how it ends, all right? I need you to put one arm in front of the other and pull yourself towards shore. Got it?"
She nodded, unable to speak.
"Go," he commanded. He helped her get turned towards shore, and she put one hand in front of her and tried to pull. Her fingers slipped. Lee was behind her then.
"Can you hang onto me?" he asked. She nodded. "All right, good. Hang onto me tightly." She turned and grasped his shoulders, wrapping one arm around his neck tightly as instructed. She felt him exert himself trying to pull them both towards shore. She felt bad she couldn't help. Her limbs felt useless. She wondered how he was able to function in the cold. She wondered how Liam was there at all since he was dead. Was she hallucinating? Was he acting as a guardian angel?
"Almost there, Kate," Lee said into her ear. She didn't respond.
"Kate?" he said again. He had her face in his hands, fingers tugging at the corners of her eyes to open them. "Kate? I need you to grab the brush on the shore. It's right there." He turned her face so she could see. She didn't think she could grab it.
"Can you grab it? Kate?"
She really wanted to nod, to tell him she could do it. It was simple enough, but her body was frozen. The fight was leaving her.
"Shit," he said. "All right. Here goes." She felt him adjusting her until she felt him throw her as hard as he could. She landed on something hard and started to slip back down, but his hand was on her backpack, dragging her back up. He had jumped after her and stopped her from falling back in.
"Kate?" he asked, opening her eyes with his thumbs. "Can you hear me?"
"Li-," she managed to say. Liam.
"Okay," he said. He was shivering too, but he had to stay focused. "I'm going to go back for my bag, okay? I'll be right back." They weren't too far from it, and he had dry clothes in there as well as food. He had to make a fire. He had to warm her up. Kate didn't respond, and he knew she probably had the first, if not second, stage of hypothermia. That water was ice. He knew he was going to get it too if he didn't hurry up. He ran as fast as he could, finding his bag where he had left it and returning in what seemed like a long time. Kate was curled in a ball, shaking and shivering when he got back.
"Hey, Kate," he said, shaking her. "Kate, stay with me." She opened her eyes briefly and closed them again. He pulled off his sleeping bag from the outside of his bag (he never went anywhere without it after learning his lesson the hard way) and threw it open. He hesitated only briefly, but he knew that between modesty and life or death, he had to choose life or death.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I won't look much." He stripped her wet clothes off as fast as he could and awkwardly dried her off with eyes as averted as he could make them before he put her into the sleeping bag, zipping it around her. Then he wrung out her hair as best as he could and found his toque to put on her. He redid the bandage on her arm too. When he finished, he quickly changed, using a rag to dry himself off first. Then it was time to make a fire. He stayed calm all throughout the entire ordeal, and within fifteen minutes, he had a fire going. He hoped it wouldn't alert the bad guys to where they were, but he figured the rock wall behind them would hide the smoke for a bit at least. It was a risk he had to take.
"Shit," he said to himself once his heart rate returned to normal. This was not how things were supposed to go. He also couldn't stop thinking about Barney. Was he all right? Did he get caught? Would the others figure out what happened? Had they gotten caught too? The whole thing was a mess. His radio was no longer working either since his swim. He had forgotten to take it off before jumping in. He sat alone with his thoughts for a while until Kate startled him.
"Liam!" she shouted, making him jump. He looked over at her, and she was twisting her head around. "Liam, stop." Lee got to his feet, going over to her. Who was Liam?
"Liam, don't," she was crying now. "Liam, you're going to die."
"Kate," Lee said, gently shaking her. It seemed she was having a nightmare.
"LIAM!" she shrieked before jolting upright and gasping for air, making Lee fall back a little. Lee watched her try to breathe before he announced he was there.
"Kate?"
"Liam?" she asked, blinking at him.
"It's Lee," he corrected.
"Oh...of course," she nodded. She felt so stupid. Of course it was Lee who had saved her. Liam was dead. Emma was right. Lee did remind her of her brother, but only in a small way. They both had bravery and courage, and they both cared about her. She hugged herself tightly.
"You okay?" he countered.
"I...I think so. What happened?"
"You went for a little swim." He didn't mention her crying about Liam in her sleep. He didn't know why, but something was telling him that she would tell him when she was ready.
"Oh. Is that why I'm naked in here?" she asked, realizing. She took in the sight of her clothes draped around the fire as Lee had put them there trying to dry them off for her.
"Yea."
"Okay."
"I didn't look." He was still trying not to think about what he had touched while drying her off.
"I don't care if you did. You saved my life," she said, still looking at him. "I owe you for that."
"It comes with the job," Lee dismissed. "Everyone saves everyone at some point."
"Well, when it comes to my turn saving your life, we'll be even," she commented. He chuckled at this.
"Okay," he agreed.
"Where are the others?"
"I don't know."
"Is Barney okay?"
"I don't know."
"Are we out here all night?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know much do you?" she asked.
"At this point, no I don't. Let's just focus on getting dry and warmed up, okay?"
"Okay."
She settled back down and looked up at the sky, which was growing dark. She tried not to feel afraid. After all, she was with Lee, and he just proved to her that he could pretty much do anything. She looked at him again sitting over by the fire. Her nightmare was still very vivid in her mind. It was the same one she always had aside from Ted strangling her. It was more of a memory really. Liam's fall was always in slow motion in her dream, his eyes staring up at her when he was on the ground. She blinked. Lee looked at her again, and there was something in his eyes that seemed empathetic. Had she talked in her sleep? Had he heard her?
"You all right?" he asked.
"Yea," she lied. "I'm fine."
...
"Where are they?" Toll asked when Barney showed up with the truck alone. He had fought off the men, using the truck as his weapon. Most people didn't survive getting run over, especially when they got run over twice.
"They're supposed to be here," Barney answered.
"They're not here," Toll said obviously. He felt scared. Was Kate all right?
"Something's happened," Gunner noted. He could feel it.
"What do we do?" Caesar asked Barney.
"We're not leaving them behind," Toll interrupted.
"We can't be sitting ducks here either," Doc reasoned. "The bad guys know we're here."
"We can't leave them behind!" Toll insisted.
Barney knew something was wrong almost immediately after they had split up. Lee hadn't answered his radio. All he got was a bunch of static.
"If you wanna stay here and find them, go ahead. We gotta get these bombs outta here," Barney said. "That's our job." He was loading the plane with the bombs with the help of Caesar, Doc, and Gunner.
"He wouldn't leave you behind," Toll argued. Barney didn't want to leave Lee behind, but he knew Toll was wrong. If it came down to millions dying versus two, Lee would make the same decision Barney was. At least, he thought that was what Lee would do.
"I'll stay with Toll," Gunner offered. "You, Doc, and Caesar get those bombs out of here."
Toll gave Gunner a grateful look. They were done loading the plane by now.
"All right," Barney nodded. "Keep in touch. I'll come back once I'm free and clear to give you a ride home. Should be tomorrow."
"Good luck," Doc said to them as he boarded behind Caesar. The plane started, and Toll disappeared into the brush with Gunner. They were going to wait in hiding for a bit in case Lee and Kate showed up.
...
"Lee?"
Lee snapped his eyes open, and his gun automatically went to the intruder's face in front of him. Kate gasped. Once his brain caught up to him, he saw her crouching in front of him with her eyes squeezed shut and his gun under her chin.
"Shit, I'm sorry," he said, pulling it back quickly. "You scared me."
"It's okay. I shouldn't have startled you," she said. Her mind was catapulting her back to when Alejandro had his gun jammed under her chin, making her sign the forms. She forced it to stop. Lee was just acting on reflex. That was all. He wouldn't hurt her.
"You okay?" he asked, finally seeing her. She was standing in front of him wearing one of his long sleeve shirts. He swallowed when he noticed she was not wearing anything else, and his shirt barely made it halfway to her knees.
"I'm just really cold, but my pants aren't dry yet, so I was hoping you'd have something," she said. "I borrowed your shirt. Is that okay?"
"That's fine," he nodded. He stood up and went digging through his bag. She stood close to the fire while she waited. He had nothing else, so he turned to look at his clothes drying by the fire. He didn't mind wearing damp clothes if it meant she would be warm.
"What are you doing?" she asked when he took off his pants.
"I'm not seducing you, if that's what you're thinking," he told her.
"Are you sure?" she asked, tilting her head. He ignored the question and pulled his semi dry ones back on, handing her his dry pants.
"They might not fit, but you can tie this around it," he said, showing her some rope.
"Okay," she agreed. He averted his gaze as she pulled his pants on. He refused to let his mind wander to whether or not she was wearing underpants. He hadn't looked to see if they were still on the branch he'd put them on.
"They're not too bad, but I do feel a bit like Tom Sawyer," she joked as she tied the rope through the belt loops.
"Well, you're better looking than Tom Sawyer that's for sure," he laughed. He stopped when she looked at him.
"You think I'm good looking?" she asked.
Shit. And he had walked right into it.
"Oh, no. I'm not getting into that trap," he said, detouring the conversation from where it was heading.
"What trap?"
"Lacy did that to me. She'd ask me my opinion about something, and when I answered, she bit my head off. No way," he shook his head. Kate moved closer to him then.
"You know," she said quietly. "Not everyone is like Lacy."
"I'm not really willing to find out," he confessed.
"That's too bad," she said. "You might miss out on something really amazing."
His whole body screamed at him to pull her close and kiss her, but he couldn't do that to Toll. He just couldn't.
"You might be right," he agreed. Then he turned away and sat back down on his log. He couldn't help but notice her expression and the disappointment there.
"Do you think the others left?" she asked after a while. She sat down on a log away from him.
"Probably. Barney would be stupid not to get those bombs out of here," Lee said.
"Do you think Toll left too?"
"He probably stayed to wait for us." Because Toll was a good and loyal friend, like Lee was trying to be.
"Is it me?" she asked suddenly. Lee looked at her then.
"Is it you what?" he questioned, confused. Kate inhaled slowly. She wasn't really sure why she was diving into this right now. It might have something to do with her almost dying and realizing what she really wanted. Probably, yes. He was waiting for an answer, so she started again.
"Is there just something about me that you don't like?"
"I'm not sure where you're going with this..."
"Don't you remember when we first met?" she said, leaning forward. "Was I the only one who felt that?"
Lee swallowed again. So that was what she was talking about. God help him.
"No," he shook his head. "You weren't the only one who felt it."
Kate met his eyes and refused to look away. Lee felt a whole bunch of different feelings inside at this point.
"So what happened?" she asked. "I mean, I get that you met Lacy, and I got married, but when we were both single after they left us, I kind of thought you'd come for me."
Lee was quiet for a while. He cursed his past self. Barney was right. He was an idiot.
"I didn't know how," he confessed. "And I was scared. I mean, I was supposed to marry Lacy, right? Then she just leaves me and says she doesn't love me anymore. What if...what if you did that too?"
She was luring out the critter. Barney was right. She couldn't believe it, but she didn't want to scare him back into hiding by coming on too strong.
"What if I didn't?" Kate asked gently. Lee made an exasperated sound.
"You're just like Barney, you know? He said the same thing over and over again. Then you met Toll..."
"I've had a few dates with Toll, yes," she agreed. "But that's just it, they're just dates. I'm not marrying him."
"I can't do that to him," Lee told her. "I know he feels like he's in the background all the time, and if I took his girl..."
"His girl?" Kate asked, incredulous. "I'm not something to be owned, Lee."
"No, I know that. I'm trying to say that Toll would kill me if I went after you," Lee finished. He let his hands fall to his knees. He was such a dithering idiot sometimes.
"I think he would understand," Kate reasoned. "We met first. We're friends. He has to know. Did he not hear about how we met?"
"Yea, but he probably figures that's water under the bridge now. It was seven years ago. Things change."
"So you're really just going to sit there and ignore the fact that I'm going commando in your pants right now?" she asked. Lee tensed. Good grief. She had to tell him.
"Yup," he nodded. "Cos I'm a good friend, and good friends don't steal other friends' girlfriends or dates, or whatever you want to call it."
"Okay," she said after a moment. Lee closed his eyes, feeling very frustrated with himself.
"When it's morning, we head back to where the plane was," he said.
"Sure," she agreed. His loyalty just made her want to be with him even more. She would have to talk to Toll after this, she knew it. He watched her get up and go curl back up into his sleeping bag, and he hated himself for being such a damn loyal friend.
...
"Let's start looking," Toll suggested.
"All right," Gunner agreed. "Radios working?" They might get separated, and Gunner liked knowing they could still communicate.
"Yup," Toll nodded, checking it.
"They'll be all right," Gunner assured him. Toll just nodded. He was more worried about them being alone together than anything, but he had to trust them. Lightning flashed in the sky, making them both look up.
"Great," Toll said sarcastically. "Wouldn't be a search party without a storm on top."
Gunner just chuckled to himself as they went off into the bush. He didn't mind a little rain.
...
The thunder woke Lee instantly. He looked up just as it started to pour rain.
"Come on," he growled. Like they needed to get wet again. Kate was awake by this point, and she jumped to her feet.
"What's your plan?" she called over the rain, which was becoming torrential almost. Lee shone his light around until he spied a dense spot under some pine trees. Kate followed him with the sleeping bag while Lee grabbed his backpack. They huddled under the trees, watching the rain. Some water still dripped through, but it was better than getting soaked. Lee rested his elbows on his knees and gripped his face with his hands.
"I'd kill for a cigarette," Kate sighed.
"That's what you're thinking about right now?" Lee asked, incredulous. He was cold. He knew she was cold. He cursed the whole mission, the damn mountains, the wretched river, and now this infuriating rain. He'd had enough.
"It's better than thinking about anything else," she commented.
"Right," Lee muttered. Kate dared to look over at him, and his face illuminated once in a while with the lightning. She shivered. She didn't like storms, especially with no roof over her head.
"Why do you even smoke anyway?" he asked. "It's not good for you."
"I just do."
"It'll kill you."
"So will this job."
"Why won't you tell me why?" he pressed.
"Because it's not important," Kate snapped. He raised a brow at her, and she swallowed. "I'm sorry. I get irritable when I haven't had a smoke."
"Another great reason to quit, but it's all right. I won't ask again," he said. They sat quietly as the storm got worse.
"Shit!" she gasped when a particularly bright shot of lightning struck close to them. She covered her head and ears just as the thunder roared. Liam had always checked on her when it stormed when they were kids. She would be terrified, huddling under the blankets, and he'd come with his flashlight and read comics with her to take her mind off of it. She kept her eyes squeezed shut. If she pretended she was there, then maybe it would help. No sooner than she thought any of this, Lee took the sleeping bag and pulled it over both of them to block it all out. He waited for her to notice and open her eyes, the flashlight in between them.
"Not a fan of storms, huh?" he asked, once she finally looked at him. She shook her head.
"How are you so calm?" she questioned. "About everything?"
"It's just something I've always done," he shrugged. More thunder crashed, and Kate inhaled sharply and cringed. Lee made up his mind and put his arm around her, letting her lean into him. It was dangerous territory, but he wasn't about to let her keep feeling afraid.
"I'm such a wuss," she tried to joke.
"I'm not judging," he told her. I have fears too. He didn't say this out loud, but she made him want to share his darkest fears and nightmares. She made him want to tell her everything.
"Lacy was a real shit for leaving you," Kate said eventually.
"I know that, but why do you think so?" Lee asked.
"Because you're so good," Kate answered, twisting to look at him. Lee felt cautious with her so close to him.
"Really."
"You're kind and generous. You're smart and funny. You are loyal. You are brave. You are...everything," Kate finished. "What woman is crazy enough to not want that?"
"I don't know," Lee answered. Kate reached to touch his face gently, and for a moment, just a moment, he let her. Then he carefully took her hand in his and removed it, putting space between them again.
"Lee..."
"No, Kate," Lee said. "I meant what I said. I will not do that to Toll."
"But you do feel something," Kate prodded. "I'm not imagining it, and you have been lying to me."
"I don't let people get close to me," Lee cut in. "People close to me get hurt or they hurt me. The only exception is Barney. The others are a close second."
"And me?" Kate asked. "Where do I fit on your scale?"
"I can't let you get close to me," Lee said, exhaling roughly. "If anything happened to you, I'd never forgive myself."
"I know exactly what that's like," Kate argued. "But I still need that closeness with someone."
"Get it with Toll," Lee shot back at her.
"I know you're lying to me when you say that," Kate responded. "You've hated it from the start. Why didn't you just tell me? Tell him?"
"For the reason I just told you," Lee answered. He grew anxious then, and he had to get away, to breathe. He pulled the sleeping bag off of his head and stood up. Rain be damned. Storm be damned. He needed to get out of there before he did or said something he'd regret.
"Lee!" Kate called after him. Lee didn't stop. He didn't know where he was even going, but all he knew was that he didn't want to be there.
