Fate/Stay Night: Umbra Bello

Blaze2121- Not sure how shipping is gonna go for the MC right now. I got at least three ideas in my head, and as luck would have it, Rin is one of them. The other's are, of course, Okita, and finally none at all. Depending on how the story goes. I was also slightly considering Ayako for a while, but after I doubled, tripled, and quadrupled down on wanting to do the abridged series… no. Thinking about it now, I can kinda foresee a relationship between MC and Rin looking like a parody of tfs's Bulma, and Vegeta.


Chapter VII- Meet Our Hero

Date: 01/30/2004

Time: 7:24 am

Location: Emiya Household Shed


'Snore-Snore…'

Creeee

"Shirou, you stupid idiot. Sleeping out here alone. Where you'll catch a stupid cold, and I'll have take care of you, fetch you a stupid blanket-" the passive agression is strong with this one.

"Wha-huh?" and the object of her affections awakens.

"Fu- I-mean heeeey~ buddy~!" Sakura welcomed her 'Senpai' to the waking world. "Don't you wanna get off the stupid ground and come inside?"

"Ugh, morning Sakura… did I fall asleep fixing literally everything I could get my hands on again?" he did intend to go to bed last night, but he guessed he must've nodded off at some point around 1 in the morning.

Sakura could only sigh internally. Hoping that one day he might come around to fixing her… but what could she do?

… for that matter, what could he do? Getting him involved would only ever get him hurt.

So she was pretty much stuck like this. While she was in his house, she could only ever find herself dancing around it. And as much as she tried to hold it back around him, eventually frustration won out, and she found herself being almost to the point of snappy at him. Just hoping he'd take notice… and hoping he pushes her away. For his sake.

No. She can't involve him in her problems. As much as this hurts, she can't stand the thought of him dying.

Still, at least like this, she can at least pretend for a while that things were normal. Until he leaves, until he finds another girl... or until she finally breaks.

"Sudden thought Shirou. What if you didn't go collecting trash around the neighborhood, and didn't try to fix said trash?" the clutter was getting pretty ridiculous in here...

"But pipes are so useful! Literally everything has a pipe somewhere probably." he truly is the bone of his pipe.

Sakura turned to leave, and rolled her eyes. "I just finished making food for you and Taiga. Don't put yourself out thanking me once in a while!" translation- 'please notice me senpai!'

Shirou smiled as she turned to leave. Ever since she helped him around the house when he got an Archery injury he's found himself asking one question. "What would we do without her?"

He yawned for a moment before turning to the set up he worked on last night. At least twenty pipes of varying shapes lay broken on the floor… along with a clock he just so happened to come across.

He grabbed one of the pipes…

"Trace on."

He smirked. Finally successful.

"Look out. Today, I save pipes, tomorrow the world!"


Theme Song- Fate/Stay Night - "Brave Shine" (FULL Opening) | ENGLISH ver | AmaLee


Later that day...

"-then Shinji took the broken part of the bench and started using it to block arrows, but since he couldn't get close to Ayako without getting his face impaled he threw the closest thing at her. That's how the heater got involved." Issei finished explaining as he adjusted his glasses.

"You ever notice our school has a real problem with violence? Oh, and uh… hand over the conductive wire." Shirou asked offhandedly as he was working on the unfortunate heater that got involved.

Issei looked around for a bit looking for which part Emiya was talking about before the redhead pointed it out for him.

"Indeed. It becomes more apparent that its name is Shinji every day. So give it to me straight Doc, is he gonna make it?" he put on some fake drama.

"'Pfft', yeah probably just needs some tape, and soldering. And sweet… delicate love…" not weird at all.

"Sounds good. By the way, how long you got?" Issei was asking him how long he had to fix stuff.

"Aaabout half an hour. Why.?"

"..." Issei was almost embarrassed to admit it…

"...ok, how many more are there?" Shirou braced himself for the news.

"...about three more heaters. One in the second AV room, one in Ms Fujimura's class, and the other in the art club. As well as the TV that one of The Trio accidentally punched two months ago, and the PA system in the B hallway has been sending weird twisted messages ever since Mr Kazuki tried to run that fire drill three weeks ago... Personally, I think that last one might need more of an exorcist, but I'd at least like to run that by you first." that's… those are certainly doable, buuut-

"I… think I can take care of a heater or two today, but I'll see what I can do about the TV… Not sure about the haunted PA though…" His dad never said anything about whether proper ghosts were real, only saying there were certain kinds of spirits out there before going on a rant about marbles, but he'll still look into it. "Still, as long as I'm working on this, I'll need you to get out." Can't have normal people seeing this stuff.

"Right, right. Gotta perform your magic as it were." he says as he leaves the room.

"Right. Something like that." yeaaaah… 'as it were.'

Once he was gone…

"Heater… reveal your secrets to me…"

Skip...


Shirou moved down the hall.

The heater was easy enough to fix. In fact, he'll have enough time to take care of the one in the AV room before class started again.

This time he was heading for… English.

It's not that he didn't care for learning foreign languages. In fact, he figured he'd need to learn a few to get around once he became a hero.

The issue was...well, it was the teacher. His guardian, Taiga. She could be… let's say eccentric? … just now noticing the school has a pattern of hiring odd people. Still, she was good at her job.

For some reason, Shirou heard something when he was passing by the literature classroom that he sort of listened in to for a brief moment.

"'Not all those who wander are lost', this is one of my favorite quotes from all of fiction-"

For some reason Shirou couldn't help but smile at that, and felt like that could somehow apply sometime in the future. Possibly even in the present if he stretched the meaning.

Regardless, thinking about this distracted him briefly from watching where he was going, and he soon-

BAM

Found himself running into someone.

"''Gah'...er… sorry I wasn't… oh! Sakura!?" Shirou realized who he had bumped into.

"ooowww... sorry about being in your way and all… I didn't realize it wasn't okay to stand minding my own business…" she groaned as she tried collecting her stuff that was knocked over.

"I'm-so-sorry! I-I wasn't paying attention, and- let me help you!" there was much awkward fumbling around as he tried helping her.

"Noooo, I really-really do like cleaning up after someone knocks me around. You can just go about your day, don't mind me." translation- thank you for stopping to help.

Honestly Shirou couldn't tell if she was being serious or not, but really didn't care either way. He was still going to help her.

"You sure you- 'Gasp'!" he was immediately concerned about the bruise he found on her hand. Worried he might've done it. "Follow me! I'll get your stuff so we can head to the nurses office!"

Sakura blinked, then realized what he was talking about. "N-no, this is… don't worry about it. It's fine."

Buuut, he insisted, and she found herself in the office along with him doing what they could to fix it.

The nurse wasn't there. Probably on lunch or something. But since Sakura helped out in her free time around here, she already knew where everything was.

"Strange. For some reason I can see you working at a place like this Sakura." Shirou noted as he was helping her hand.

Sakura was resisting the urge to blush at her upperclassman giving her so much attention.

"Really? I can only imagine those intimately familiar with one of me thinking that much about it." the 4th wall just lost a few bricks.

"What do you mean one of you?" Shirou caught the slip.

"Huh?"

"You said 'one of me' as in, there was another Sakura you were talking about?" aaand there goes another brick…

"Oh. I meant only those familiar with me…" she admonished herself for the slip up.

"No no, it's fine, I mean, You're the only Sakura I could want, so it works out anyway…" and here comes Mr Harem Protagonist. Of course, Shiro only said this in a platonic manner. But Sakura...

Sakura couldn't hold back the blushing this time

"O-oh… yeah, that's…" she was kinda fumbling over her words at that. Trying to come up with a sarcastic quip, or find a way to direct this conversation way.

Did he just say that he wants her, or that he wants her?

She dismissed this thought process quickly. No. She had to keep him back. She couldn't let him get hurt.

Shirou finished up, then said, "Well… I gotta get to class- oh shit."

He was at least five minutes late at this point. By the time he got there from where he was he'd be about eight minutes late if he ran.

Whether or not he cared about being late to class was one thing. Being Late to a class where your guardian was the teacher was another!

."Ruuun Forest. Ruuuun…" Sakura quoted as Shiro quickly apologized, and ran for it.

Unfortunately for him, Taiga was too hungry at the moment to listen to his explanations, and because he'd already been late several times before, he was punished in the form of having to clean the dojo tomorrow. She understood it couldn't be done today because Shirou had promised to work extra hours at his part time job. That's where he found himself going after school today.


Several more hours later…

Welp, that was a chore.

After spending a few hours restocking at his place of work, Shirou was on his way home.

It had gotten dark by now. It was the end of January, so it was still practically night time by 5.

As Shirou came across a hill something suddenly felt…

BZZZZT BZZZZT BZZZZT

Off.

"He-he-he-he-he-he….."

Shirou looked to see-

Was that little girl always there?

"He-he-he-he-he-he….." she continued giggling to an unknown joke as she walked his way.

Shirou tensed. He's seen enough horror movies to know where this was going.

No- a hero doesn't get afraid because of some little girl. He just kept walking until-

"It would be a terrible night to die…"

She says as she passes him.

"Huh!?" Shirou turned to face her but… she was gone?

"I-... not that I don't agree with that- but context please? Hello..!? Tiny frightening child...?"

… beginning to think ghosts might be a thing now.


Next Morning...

"Try to think of the family Shirou! If she killed you I wouldn't be able to come here, and eat Sakura's cooking. Is that what you want!?" Taiga scolded him as she chowed down on said food.

Shirou rolled his eyes. He wasn't really that concerned. Really.

On another note, he didn't quite blame Taiga for feeling like she was missing out. Sakura had really improved in her cooking lately. She was catching up to him in terms of Japanese dishes, and had arguably surpassed him at Western foods. Frankly, he was kinda proud of her.

"I probably would've drop-kicked her off the road… but letting it go is good too…" Sakura wasn't entirely joking. She hoped Shirou would try to be safe, but if it were her, she'd probably just try to avoid her… kinda like she does with all her problems she has the choice to. Path of least resistance, and all that...

"We're not really family Taiga, and I'm not drop-kicking a little girl Sakura!" Emiya objected.

"Little girls can have big knives… just sayin'…" the Matou added.

"I love that bravado Shirou! One time, when I was your age, I got banned from an international Kendo tournament for 'being too amazing at owning bitches!'." Taiga told a short story.

"That's a thing that happened… there's no lie here…" Sakura butted in.

Hm. Methinks there be a lie here…

"I kinda like your dream of being a hero too, just kinda vague…" Taiga says offhandedly.

Shirou groans on the inside a little. As much as he tries to explain his dream, a lot of people just don't understand. What he wants is to use his abilities to save as many people as possible. He wants to be a real hero of justice.

"Don't know what you mean, I think it's plenty specific. Get ripped, save everyone." he sums it up.

"Sounds kinda stupid, sorry, not sorry…" Sakura knew what he meant, and hoped she can steer him away from a dream that would tear him away from her.

"Hey! No one get's to say my dream is stupid but me!" he, again, objects. If they knew he had magic powers they'd believe in him.

"Sorry, not sorry…"


.Later that day…

Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-Drip-

Shirou wiped the sweat from his brow.

It took a while, but the dojo was finally scrubbed clean.

"'Phew', Now that that's done, I think I can get around to that TV. How someone could accidentally punch one of those things is beyond me, but-"

"Rin!"

"Huh?" that was coming from the courtyard…

Shirou walked quickly over to the source of that voice.

What he saw surprised him.

There were two people, a red guy, and a blue guy fighting to the death at a speed that didn't seem possible.

Another thing, they also had really cool clothes, and weapons, so cool he couldn't help but shout-

"I WANT THAT!"

"Who's there!? Who just complimented us!?"the blue one shouted.

Oh shit!

"I'M SORRY!"

Emiya ran as his life depended on it!

He guessed those guys had to be really powerful Mages, so he knew it was best he didn't get involved. His Dad told him that if he ever ran into Mages, avoid them at all costs. Although he was taught to use magic, he was more of a magic-user than a proper Mage, as people like that could be 'real sons a bitches'... Or so Shirou was told.

But still…

"They're so cool-They're so cool-They're so cool- Hope I ne~ver see them again-!" he fanboyed as he rounded a corner.

"Too slow…" he heard the blue one right behind him!

Shirou turned his head to see the blue guy right behind him.

The world turned almost into slow motion as he screamed in utter terror.

"Waaaaah!" he screamed shrilly, as he fell over to avoid the oncoming spear.

"Don't-kill-me-I'm-a-hero!... huh?" he looked around, but… he was gone?

"Di-Did he spare me? Who was that guy? Where can I get his spandex?" asking the real questions here…

"There once was a boy in a school…"

"Hu-"

Clang!

Pain

"'GAH!'" Shirou twisted around clutching his thigh to see the spearman being blocked by… where does he recognize that coat from..?

There was a girl wielding a katana that redirected the blow meant for his heart. Although it still seemed to cut him on his left leg where he was bleeding now.

"'Grrr', okay, I thought we had an understanding here!" the spearman growled out as he pulled away.

"My Master wants this boy alive, and so I do as well Lancer... You also ran off from that fight... and I called next." she says as she readies a Waki no Kamae stance.

"They get one taste, and I gotta beat em off with a stick…" the blue guy trailed off as he attacked the woman.

Shirou was bewildered. What the hell was going on-

"Hey you!" someone shouted.

Shirou turned to look down the hall to the left.

There was a person there by a stairwell, around his age with a- is that a squirrel on his head?

"Come with me if you want to live!" he ordered.

"Fou!" the squirrel thing continued.

Shirou didn't know for sure if he could trust this guy, but considering his other options would be either A, walking into…

CLANG!

CLANG!

CLING!

CLANG!

What seemed to be a meat grinder, or B, heading back to that red guy…

He took his chances.

"Shit-Shit-Nope!-" Emiya repeated as he heard glass shatter behind him.

"Follow me!" the guy ordered as Shirou got close, and ran up that stairwell.

"So uh... would kinda like a little explanation please!?" Emiya asked for information desperately as he followed the guy.

"Long story, I'll tell ya later. For now, trust me." the stranger said as they found themselves on the second floor.

Shirou really didn't have much choice, as this guy seemed to be the only person that wasn't trying to kill him at the moment.

The stranger seemed to take a moment to get his bearings, and mumbled something about timing, before-

"Gonna have to make one- come on!" he ordered and ran down the hall.

Shirou followed close behind.

"So, can I just get a run down or-!" he again tried getting some information.

"You're a Magus right?" the stranger asked.

"Um, I do Magecraft, yeah. Why?" Shirou gave an answer.

Was this guy a Mage too? He hasn't met another one since his dad died.

"You ever see Battle Royale?" he continued.

"Uh… yeah?" it had been a few years since he's seen it.

"Basically that, exceptwith Mages. Again, long story." he sort of explained.

They ended up next to a classroom. Actually, Shirou realized this was Fugi-nee's class.

"Hold on! Why are you all killing each other!?" if people were getting hurt, Shirou wanted to put a stop to it.

"I'll explain later, right now, you run home and do your thing!" he ordered as he opened the door.

"W-Wait! How am I supposed to get ou- No, how are you supposed to-!"

"We'll figure that out later, Just-GO!" he shouted as he-

"'Yah'!" tossed Shirou right into the room and

SLAM

Slammed the door behind him.

Shirou wanted to run back over there and help him with whatever was going on, or at least get more answers when-

CHING!

That blue guy's spear went through the door.

Figuring he was outmatched here, Shirou decided since that guy was probably a superior mage, he probably could take care of himself… probably.

Okay, really, he just had no idea what was going on, and knew staying around here was probably suicidal, so decided to take that guy's advice and run for it… besides, he could probably grab one of his many pipes at home, and come back ready to kick some ass!

Still, he had to get out first.

Looking around the room, he saw that someone had left a window open.

He sighed as he realized this was probably what was killing the heater.

He also realized this was his chance to get out!

It would suck jumping out of the building, but he could do it.

Jumping out of the window he thought to himself-

"Okay, so Battle Royale with Mages… sounds pretty cool, but also very freaking terrifying."

The next thing he said to himself-

"Oh-shiii~ OW!" he yelled out as he landed.

And as much as he wanted a proper explanation for what happened in there, he also kinda hoped he'd never see that guy, or any of those other people again.

Making a break for the exit, Shirou ran harder than he'd ever ran before in his life. Possibly giving the Trio pause if they could see it.

He also briefly wondered what that guy meant by his thing… maybe he was expecting Shirou to come back? Well, he would be, just to make sure they were gone before students came back in the morning. He just needed to come back with a handful of pipes...


Minutes later...

Almost out of breath, Emiya burst into his house panting.

"Home, sweet hooome… ((unintelligible)). 'BHREH'!" crashing onto the ground, he gave himself time to collect his very confused mind. "This is fiiiine…" it's not. "The floor is fiiiine..." it's actually quite hard.

"Okay, so- those were what Mages were like... Good to know." now he knew what his dad meant. Silver lining.

"Still, those guys in blue, and red were awesome! A-And that girl in the Haori! She was all- 'you're mine-whacha!'. And that guy with the Squirrel was like- 'Come with me if you want to live!' like he was the god-damned Terminator!" he fanboyed over the sheer coolness of the badassess that were fighting tonight. "That red guys swords looked a bit awkward though…" those falchions didn't seem all that practical.

"Wonder if I can be that good of a Mage some day…" he could at least dream right?

"Oh~! So you're a Mage!"

"Huh!?" Uh-oh, blue guy alert!

"Get DEAD!"

"D'AUUUGH!" Shirou narrowly dodged the spear meant for his head as he rolled out of the way when the blue guy appeared above him. "J-Jesus, what are you doing-'dah'!?" he asked as he bumped his head on a counter trying to get away.

Desperate, he grabbed a piece of rolled up poster like it was a newspaper he was using on a dog.

"See, here's the thing kiddo, I originally wanted to kill you because normies can't see Mage shenanigans. It was part of your kinds code that I eliminate you." the spearman explained.

Shirou understood this. It was why he worked so hard to keep his friends at school from seeing what he did to fix the equipment. He… he really didn't know what he'd do if anyone did happen to see him. His dad told him memory erasure was a thing, but Shirou had no idea how to do it.

"Alright! I accept that, but, I'm a Mage!" he hoped the blue guy would listen to reason.

"That you are. Got that now…" the spearman grinned as he readied his weapon.

"So… go awaaaay..?" Emiya told/asked.

"Can't do that." the blue guy didn't seem all that sad about it.

"Why-not!?" Shirou asked, exasperated.

"Let's just say, I got a thing to prove to Saber." so, basically, he's an asshole?

"Trace-ON!" and Shirou enhanced the crap out of the paper.

The two fighters circled around the table. Shirou was trying to move to the exit in hopes he'd be in a position to run to his pipe shed.

"May I ask what you're doing?" the spearman could see he was doing something with the paper.

"This paper might not be a pipe, but with a little reinforcement magic, it can be like a pipe. I'm gonna smack you in the face with my pipe blue bomber!" the Mage declared confidently.

"Right… here's the thing about that…"

WHAM

"((Unintelligible))" Shirou was knocked down his hallway faster than he could register the guy move.

Moving quickly, he bolted in the direction of the shed.

"Where the hell's the squirrel guy!?" he asked fate, desperately, as he jumped through a window pane to get out quicker.

CRASH

SHATTER

"Oh god that hurt!" he screamed as he picked himself up.

"When you say squirrel guy-"

WHAM

The spearman kicked him across the field.

Emiya groaned in pain as he skidded across, and tried to get back up.

"You weren't talking about that Master were you? His Servant didn't seem to be in a condition to be much help." Master? Servant? Was… was this part of that Battle Royale stuff he was talking about?

"Son of a bitch…" Shirou got lucky, as he was kicked closer to the shed.

"Oh nooo, he's going into a sheeed~! What am I gonna do~~~!? The spearman had also seen enough horror movies to know where this was goin'.

Shirou was almost relieved to be in his poor-mans workshop.

"Maybe I can throw my rocks at him?" it was better than nothing at this point.

"HEADS UP!" the blue guy shouted as he thrusted his weapon at the Mage.

"Damn it!" Shirou reacted quick enough to block the spear with his reinforced poster. "'Gah'!"

Unfortunately, it didn't hold back the force, which knocked him onto the ground.

The spearman paused the killing for a moment.

"Sorry kid. This is the least enjoyable bet I've ever made. And that's saying something." so says the hound.

"There once was a Lancer in blue. He had a dark job to do. His prey was so sad, but wasn't that bad!" he at least admitted the Mage put up a fight. A poor one, but a fight nonetheless. "In his next life he might get a clue…" wouldn't bet on it.

"You know what 'Lancer'? I got a whoooole can of 'not your business' with your name on it!" I feel a speech coming on!

"So, like, the can is my business, but not what's inside the can?" processing… "That is a weird metaphor." he isn't wrong.

Little did either of them notice, the whole time Mana began to gather in the room.

.

"When I was young, the previous version of me died in an accident. But I was saved by the most valiant act of heroism I could ever comprehend!"


A great King heard someone call for her...


"I'm never letting that feeling go... I'm never letting it die!"


Like the forever-far promise of victory her blade offers, she hopes that this new bloody battlefield can finally deliver the reward that that hope promises. And prepares to answer the call once more...


"Even if this body dies, the image in my mind of that hero will live on!"


For the people she failed to serve. For the Knights she failed to lead. For the country she failed to protect.


"As long as I'm here, I'll be the vessel that becomes that image-!"


For her dear friends-!


"-And save everyone in front of me!"

BZZZZZZT-BZZZZZZT-BZZZZZZT-BZZZZZZT-

"At your behest-!"

He, and Lancer turned to the new voice-

"I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED!"

"Oh, you have got to be KIDDING ME!" Lancer barely blocked the swing from the new attacker, and was launched from the shed.

Shirou could only look on in awe.

This person this… this girl that could only be a real knight, just knocked Lancer around like he was nothing!

As the Mana that filled the room began to dissipate, the knight turned to him.

At that moment, Shirou knew he'd never forget this image as well.

She… she was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen!

A blonde foreigner that was, in fact, shorter than him, yet seemed to carry herself as someone ten times as tall. Her striking green eyes stared directly into his soul.

Then, she spoke to him.

"Thou art my Master who have summoned me from beyond the withered grasp of time. Born as is the new moon to engage, and slay, at your grim command..?"

She looked down on him as she… um…

What did she just say?

No really. He couldn't make heads or tails of that. Was that even Eng-I mean Japanese?

"Wha~?"

"I'm just doing a bit. I can speak like a modern person just fine." Oh… okay? "Are you my Master?"

Shirou didn't know what she was talking about, but if it got her to stop that blue guy... Suuuure...

"yeee-yes?" he answered warily.

She turned around to face the sparman.

"Is that Lancer?"

He was fairly more certain about this one.

"Yes."

"And the other one?" she continues.

"Huh?" Shirou looks out to see that Lancer was already fighting… what could only be Sonic the Hedgehog? "Er… yes?"

"Imma kill em'." she said as if it were the simplest fact in the world.

."Wha-?" for Shirou this was less simple, and more looney.

"Listen, you won't get this, but I just worked through some really heavy nonsense with another guy," Zero flashbacks intensify, "and I'm gonna take it out on them. B.R.B." she paused at some unknown revelation. "Huh. Modern Lingo. Neat."

She then burst out of the shed.

"Whoa!" Emiya could feel the power in her charge as her weapon came down on a Lancer that could only barely respond in time.

"'Grrr', 'grrr', okay, I can't help but feel I was SECONDS away from stopping a Servant from being summoned!" Lancer growled in frustration as he was forced on the defensive by attacks from two opponents.

However, it wasn't a coordinated assault, as the blonde knight attempted to take a few swings at the blur who- wait…

When that blur seemed to pause for a moment to change form Shirou could see it was that girl from earlier. The one that stopped Lancer.

The blonde Knight seemed to deem both of these people as valid targets. And after a burst of prana coming from the Knight seemed to knock the haori girl back a few feet-

"Ya-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-!" Lancer directed a flurry of attacks at the Knight.

"'Ha'!" the Knight burst through the Lancer's attack, and was about to deliver a blow when-

'Wosh'

'CLANG'!

She was forced to block a strike from the Haori girl.

"Oh no you don't-!" she declared, "I've waited three damn weeks to kick some ass, and now-is-that-time!" then there was an exchange of blades.

The Knight seemed to keep up well enough. But struggled to land any attack of her own.

"At the rate you actually hit me, 'that time' will be over the course of the next few weeks!" the Knight sassed.

She had a point. For all the flailing about, the Haori girl couldn't land a single blow. The defenses of the Knight were too strong. But, at the same time, she was too fast, and reacted too quickly for the Knight to hit her. It was like a fight between a fly and a T-Rex

"Now don't go forgetting me missy~!" Lancer announces as he disrupts the bout. "Die!" he thrusts his weapon at the Knight, which makes her take a step back

He then seems to be mostly after the Haori girl, not liking he's been cut off from that fight twice.

He has her on the defensive. Unable to get in between his strikes due to the Knight being there to punish any such maneuver.

"So, who is it that can't get enough of who Lancer?" the silver eyed girl calls back to earlier.

There's a sudden flicker of movement at a speed Shirou can't perceive, and the Haori girl jumps back a few feet, and assumes a defensive stance. Seeming to be waiting for something with a frustrated expression.

The Knight, and Lancer choose to switch targets to one another.

The blonde forcing the spearman to fall back.

"Your skill with a spear is astounding. It's a pity your footwork is not as keen as your polearm is long!" the Knight remarks, realizing she has him on the run.

"Ooooh shiiit! That old school diss tho~!" Shirou adds. Loving the banter.

Lancer tried blocking a blow from his left when-

"Where are you looking!?" the Knight moved in such a way that she could take his head off from his right.

"D'aughhhrrr… 'Rrraaaghh'!" but he narrowly blocks it with his weapon, and breaks off.

Now with all three opponents arranged in a triangle formation, they each waited for the others next move.

"Alright, enough games! Which Servant are you?! What is that weapon!?" Lancer demands to know.

"Confused? Perhaps I'm beating you with my faithful now, Lancer." the Knight responds.

"Oh sure Robin Hood, where's the merry men?" the Lancer quips.

"My classification eludes you, but, it sucks to be you." the Knight smiles knowingly, "I've figured out your identity…"

"First name Mario, last name Mario…" he jokes.

"Cu Chulainn! Ireland's Child of Light, and faithful dog."

"'Gasp'! But Mario Mario was so foolproof!" the Haori girl mocks.

"... so, do I just... have this stamped to my forehead, oooor..?" he turned to the Haori girl to ask her.

"Actually, you should feel lucky Lancer. My own Master had no idea who I was when they summoned me… (actually kinda disappointed by that to be honest.)" she admits, like it was a light punch to the gut.

"Your skill with a distinct red spear, acting like an almost rabid dog half the time-,"

Shirou turned to the new voice in the conversation, and saw it was the Terminator guy from earlier. They were standing on his roof watching the fight.

Holy shit, is he like, Batman!?

"- and just generally being hard to put down. You're the first hero that comes to mind in that regard." they explain.

"And you!" the Knight continues as she looks at the Haori girl. "A swordswoman of the Far East of your caliber, you can only be- Tomoe Gozen!"

There's a brief pause as what the Knight says is processed.

"... Assassin, it's no big deal-" the squirrel guy is about to start when he's cut off by the girl… 'Assassin' apparently.

"Yeah, that's… kinda the problem." she sighs, "well, at least you got the right country. You're out by a couple centuries."

"...is this important to you?" the Knight treads carefully.

"Y'know, before I was summoned, I probably wouldn't have cared... but now? I'm starting to." Assassin admits.

"A shame. If this were any other circumstance, I'd be sure to spread your legend around. You're a real blast." the Knight is about to continue when she seems to pause to… analyze the word. "Blast… I guess that works?"

"You're acclimating to all the modern slang the Grail taught us." The Lancer analyzes.

"Fo Shizzle." she continues.

"...why?" The squirrel guy asls the heavens.

"It takes a while." he lets her know. "Don't worry though. You won't have the time to worry about getting it right!"

He prepares to attack again, with his spear dispelling red Mana.

"I WANT THAT!" Shirou fanboyed aloud.

After a moment of realization, squirrel guy turned pale, and ordered- "-OH-MY-SHIT, ASSASSIN! BAIL!"

"H-Huh!? Oh right-!" and so she… vanishes?

The Knight prepares to defend herself from whatever is coming.

Lancer knew he could only hope to hit one of them with his Noble Phantasm, so he was fine with the Assassin disappearing for now. His class would allow him to track her down easily later.

"Steel yourself woman! You're about to face my most unavoidable blow!" Lancer warns as he charges in.

"GAE BOLG!"

The spear is thrown, and a fate is sealed.

The Knight is quick to react, and tracks the throw of the spear as easily as she tracked the movement of Assassin.

Still, it hit hard, and fast. So she was almost a goner.

"Your attack was strong but your aim was faulty Lancer!" She declared as-

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"Your attack was strong but your aim was-'gasp'!" the Knight realized something was off. Thanks to her abilities, she could sense the change in fate, but could only barely adjust in time. And though it missed the heart, it still found flesh.

Punching through her armor, the spear sends her flailing about.

However, despite its strength, and aim, this strike was not lethal.

As the energy of the Noble Phantasm died down, the Knight stuck the landing, clutching her wound.

"Okay, not to be a sore loser or anything… but did that attack just miss? That attack rewrites causality!" The Lancer stares in shock at his still standing opponent.

"My instincts, and my luck. Those skills together saved me." she explained.

"Well that's dumb." totally not a sore loser. "My attack that will always strike the heart was disrupted by a metaphysical role on a D20. In that case," he turns to leave, "my Master has instructed me to return if my Gae Bolg were to ever be used."

"You're running?!"

"You're running!?"

Shirou heard double. The Knight stating such as though it was an insult, and the disembodied voice of the Assassin out of incredible frustration.

"Okay now I'm definitely seeing it." The squirrel guy remarks.

"My Master is just a bit concerned about me facing an opponent that can survive fate altering attacks. Besides, I'm not all that interested in a three way. Too many opportunities for cheap shots." cause anything about this war has been fair so far.

"Aaaaawwww~!" The Assassin groans out in disappointment.

"In that case, it seems like it's just you and me Assassin." the Knight declares. Trying to feel around for her new foe.

"Oh-! Uh- no actually! This was just a mistake-!" The stranger on his roof tries to defuse the situation, but is too late.

So he… doesn't want to fight? Shirou almost breathes a sigh of relief when-

"It would seem so Saber." Assassin caries on from… nowhere? "I was hoping Lancer would prove a worthy opponent, but since he's apparently a pansy-ass, I'd be more than happy to go a round with you."

"N-No Assassin! We're here to talk-!" Squirrel guy continues, again, to no avail.

"Then, prepare yourself Assassin!" Saber announces.

"(Oh, being ignored…)" Assassin's friend realizes.

With a burst of energy, they clash once more.

In another flutter of movement-

WHAM!

CRASH!

Assassin is launched almost over his houses wall, but is knocked through the concrete instead.

"Assassin-!" the guy calls out his friend in worry when suddenly-

Whosh!

His eyes grow wide when Saber appears right in front of him and-

C-c-crrrraaackkk

Shirou felt the phantom pains when he saw her kick him right in the family jewels hard enough to send him flying through his front gate.

It didn't help when he realized she was also wearing armor.

There was a lull in the fighting for a moment. Which Shirou used to cautiously approach the girl.

"Uh… hey. My name… is… Shirou Emiya, and I've got-."

"EMIYA!?" Shirou went to protect his own balls when she seemed to react badly. "... sorry, go on."

"..got some… questions." he finishes.

"I'd be happy to answer them. But first, I'm still seething from a decade old grudge, and there's another Servant." she continues.

"What?" Shirou tries to process what she's saying.

"You stay here. No guns, or explosives please."

"I don't... have those things…"

"You never know." she says like it was a perfectly normal request. "Now I'm off to kill that Master before I develop any attachment to them, and someone chops off their hand, or shoots them in a wheelchair." Wow, she really did not like Zero.

"You're gonna kill someone!?" Wasn't she a good guy!?

"WRONG PLACE, WRONG TIME!"

She jumps over the wall to face them.

"Saber wait!" Shirou tries to go after her, but nearly trips because he forgot his leg wound.

He gets up quickly enough, and limps out the gate to see-

CLANG!

Saber forcing Assassin back with her invisible weapon.

After blowing her back a few feet, Saber redirects her strike and is about to take Batman's head off when Shirou tries to stop her.

"Saber! STOP!" a pulse of energy flies out from his hand, and stops Saber mid-swing.

"'Ga-Grrr, listen! There's no way you could have known this, but right now I'm not super cool with command seals! Please run all command seal based requests past me OR ELSE!" she protests.

The Squirrel guy takes a second to collect his bearings, and wits. He then pushes his glasses that Shirou just now notices he has, up so that the moon glints off of them.

"Well… Shirou Emiya. Listen up, I'm about to make you a deal you can't refuse." he smirks. Shirou listens in, hoping this is more information about what's going on.

His Servant looks at him in frustration just before he opens his mouth.

"...care to swap Servants?"

WHACK!

"'Yooooww'!" he yelps in pain as his Servant swats the back of his head.

Shirou is only left to wonder what any of this means.


End Theme- Disney's Hercules - GO THE DISTANCE (Michael Bolton) - Caleb Hyles Cover


Aaaand that's a wrap.

Next chapter we'll be catching up with the MC, and how things looked on his end.

Let me know what you guys think in the reviews.