If Naegi hadn't known that skipping the breakfast meeting would worry the other students, he might have let himself collapse back into bed and the temporary relief of sleep. His limbs still felt leaden from exhaustion, even after a full night of rest – it would be easy to sleep through the day and give himself the illusion this had been nothing more than an awful dream.
But he knew that wasn't true, and pretending otherwise would only make it worse when reality set in. The room key clutched in his hand was more than proof of that.
When he'd heard the doorbell ring, he'd had a brief, awful moment when he'd believed that Togami had come back – that he'd regretted leaving so quickly and was willing to listen to Naegi's explanations after all. In the long moments since Togami had left, the things he'd wanted to say had run unstoppably through Naegi's head, things that explained that he'd never meant to hurt the other boy so badly. Hurting Togami was the last thing Naegi had ever wanted to do, and he'd thought that maybe, maybe he'd been given the chance to tell him so.
And then, after a confused moment of rattling a locked knob, the door had suddenly opened – and Naegi had understood. Togami hadn't wanted to see Naegi after all. He'd just wanted to return the only thing of Naegi's in his possession – Naegi's room key. Naegi hadn't even realized Togami had still had it – that he'd kept it after helping Naegi last night. And now he'd returned it, as if to say that he was washing his hands of Naegi. He couldn't even be bothered to return it to Naegi's face – he'd left the key dangling from the lock and run off before Naegi could even catch a glimpse of him.
Just looking at the key now made Naegi feel sick from how badly he'd handled everything. And the worst part was that he still wasn't sure what else he could have done. He didn't want Togami to give up on attempting to escape just because of Naegi. How could either of them ever live with themselves if they really did end up stuck here because of each other? That would poison everything between them, even more surely than the drug on Fukawa's needles. They would have come to hate each other in the end, if they'd let that happen.
But Togami hated him now, anyway.
Naegi turned away from the key, trying to put that thought out of his mind. He didn't know if it was really that bad, not for sure. Togami might have avoided Naegi when he'd returned the key, but that didn't mean he'd keep doing it forever. Naegi was sure that given the chance, he could explain to Togami just what he'd really meant. He refused to let himself believe that everything they'd shared had been broken beyond repair.
Instead of dwelling on those depressing thoughts, Naegi made his way over towards the bathroom, using the wall to support his slow, trembling steps. He didn't have much longer to get ready if he wanted to make it to the breakfast meeting.
With his head spinning already from his trip across the room to the door, Naegi moved as carefully as he could while preparing for the day. He made it through his shower by clutching hard at the door every time the steam overwhelmed his perspective and made the room tilt alarmingly, and he felt rather proud of the fact as he stumbled out of the bathroom. He was fine, just like he'd insisted to Togami, and he wished the other boy were here so he could show him.
When Naegi finally managed to drag himself out of his room, it was approaching the time that the breakfast meeting usually ended, but he was pretty sure it wouldn't be over just yet. He should still be able to catch the others before they scattered. And – a burst of optimism struck him – and maybe Togami would even be there! He'd been attending the breakfast meetings lately, so it wouldn't be impossible. And if he were, then maybe – just maybe he'd let Naegi talk to him.
But when Naegi finally walked through the cafeteria doors, the only person he saw inside was Kirigiri, sipping a cup of tea and watching the clock. A wave of disappointment washed through him at the mostly empty room – but he supposed he shouldn't have let himself expect anything else. Togami obviously wanted to avoid him, after all. Why would he show up somewhere that he knew Naegi would be?
But that didn't explain where the others were. Naegi looked around the room again, carefully, making sure he hadn't missed Jill lurking in a corner or Ogami hidden back in the kitchen – but no. Other than Kirigiri, the room was empty.
She looked up as he made his way slowly across the room to drop into the seat across the table from her. The exertion left him a little winded, and he could see her watching as he tried to catch his breath.
"I'd thought you might be feeling better this morning," Kirigiri said at last, setting her teacup down with a faint click.
"I am," Naegi assured her, the words coming out more breathlessly than he'd intended. "I'm much better today."
She raised an eyebrow. "Appearances are deceiving, then."
"So – where are the others?" Naegi asked, frowning around the room. "How come you're the only one here?"
"I was about to ask you the same question," Kirigiri said, leaning back in her seat. "Your knight in shining armor seems to be falling down on the job."
Naegi couldn't stop himself from paling at the reference to Togami. He should have been prepared for the question – but it hadn't even occurred to him that he might need to explain what had happened. After Kirigiri had finally relented on the separation issue, of course she'd have expected them to be together again. Naturally she'd have questions at the sight of Naegi all by himself. But the thought of answering, of explaining why Togami wasn't at his side, made Naegi's stomach twist.
Kirigiri watched him as he groped uselessly for an explanation, a slight frown on her lips. "I see." She shook her head. "Well, I haven't seen him since last night. You're the first one to arrive here this morning."
"What? The first?" His own worries flew out of Naegi's mind as he realized what Kirigiri was saying. "You mean Jill and Ogami haven't shown up yet, either?"
"That's right," Kirigiri said. "I was going to wait a few more minutes before checking doors." She gave him a faint smile. "I suppose if you're here, that's one less room I need to check."
Naegi was starting to get a bad feeling about this. He didn't remember much of that elevator ride back up from the fourth trial ground, but he knew that both Ogami and Jill had been in bad shape after the executions. And at the end, when Ogami had been explaining why she'd been willing to break rules, she'd said… she'd admitted…
"We shouldn't wait any longer," Naegi said, forcing himself back to his feet despite the way it made his vision blur. "We should check on them now!"
"Are you sure?" Kirigiri asked, eyeing him dubiously as she got to her feet. "I could go, and you could stay here and try to rest. Eating something might make you feel better – at least some tea."
The thought of food made Naegi's stomach roil. "I can't think about that now," he said. "Not until we've seen that they're okay."
Kirigiri shrugged. "All right, then. Try to keep up." She headed out the cafeteria doors at her usual brisk pace, leaving Naegi to follow as best he could.
