The very last chapter is here. I just want to thank you all for reading the Great Journey of the Stick of Truth.
Chapter 28 - One Week Later, Friday
"Yo, get up. We're gonna be late for school."
"Fuck off Isaac." I could feel my head spinning as Isaac, my twin brother, was shaking my entire body. "I promise you I'm gonna whoop your ass right now." I was actually about to wake up and punch him in the stomach until I saw the clock on the nightstand that read 7:30.
"I die a little every morning."
I jolted out of bed with a start to stare out the window at the morning sun. I looked out the window and it's a beautiful Friday morning. Putting on a black buttonless jacket with a hood, gray ski pants, and gray ski gloves, I went over to the restroom to comb my blonde hair. It's cropped, went down a little past my ears, and while others thought it was a bit unkempt, I didn't care less. I then went downstairs to the kitchen to see a plate of sunny-side-egg, two pieces of toast, and the one person I did not expect to see this morning.
"Dad!" The voice out of Isaac and me showed our surprise in seeing our dad. Usually, dad is gone because he works as a plumber, and plumbers make quite a bit of money because not many people desire to do that job. But today will already be different. I can feel it.
"Cole! Isaac!" My dad, Joel Dimmons knelt down and had his arms out, and the two of us both hugged him for ten seconds. Then he let us go.
"Don't you have work today, dad?" Isaac asked.
My dad shook his head. "Nope. It's my weekend off. How are you kids?"
I sat down and began eating my breakfast. "Great, actually."
"Yeah, oh my gosh, I feel like I can take on the whole world!" Isaac's cheery comment made me chuckle. I really do miss the optimistic, carefree, airhead Isaac I knew.
My dad laughed. "Glad to hear it. Do you kids want to be taken to school today?"
Isaac and I looked at each other, then both of us nodded at dad. "Sure!"
As our dad drove us to school, I stared outside the window to see the town already repair itself since all the wreckage. The zombies and demons are no more, and the South Park Mall, as well as the rest of the town, has been completely rebuilt miraculously within the span of only five days. The people of South Park were just going about their business as if all were usual, strolling about, saying hello to each other, that sort of thing.
"Good luck at school today, kids!"
With those last words, my dad drove off in his white sedan. Isaac and I nodded at each other, then turned around to face South Park Elementary. Well this was it. After one week of the elementary school being rebuilt from the aftermath of the Stick of Truth, this is the first day we came to school this week. I felt a sudden chill, perhaps its the stingy morning air, perhaps its the fear of how the children are going to react to me. This is the first time I'll be seeing them this week. I shoved my hands into the pockets of my pants and I let out a harsh exhale.
"Nervous, dude?" Isaac asked.
I gulped and nodded as I spoke softly. "A little." I don't want to know how the 4th graders will react to us.
"I don't know what will happen." Isaac also sounded as nervous as I. "But I'm sure it will be fine."
"Well, there's only one way to find out," I replied.
"After you," Isaac gestured. Of course I'm going in first.
The two of us cautiously walked to the front door of South Park Elementary School, and immediately in the main hallway were about one-hundred 4th graders who slowly turned their attention towards the two of us. My heart skipped a beat. This is very nerve-wracking, and I would have just froze there for several seconds until a certain adult came along. "Okay, move along children, these two need their safe space." Good thing PC Counselor came to the rescue. "You better respect those two or I'll break your legs, got that?"
About PC Counselor, he used to be known as PC Principal until Principal Victoria got her job back shortly after Mr. Mackey forged her termination. The three of them made up and now Mr. Mackey is back to being a school counselor while PC Principal decided his role was better served as a second school counselor. He was still heartless and a fearmongerer, but I can't deny that his method of getting everyone else to leave us alone is effective. I gazed at Isaac who shrugged at me. "Uh, thank you PC Counselor," I bowed.
"If anyone tries to mess with you and try to invade your safe space, just come talk to me and I'll take care of it, ok?" PC Counselor said.
I nodded in confusion. "Uh, thanks. I'll make sure of it." I didn't plan on getting anyone beat up today, and I didn't really care about all the crap about safe spaces, I just want to have a clean day today.
PC Counselor nodded. "Oh, and you boys did a pretty good job at destroying Terrorblade and ending his micro-agressions. Thanks to you, his privilege is now checked."
I looked around again and I could overhear kids talking about suddenly losing their WoW powers, going to show that Terrorblade was right about the Stick. As Isaac and I went through the forward door and began to walk through the hallway, there was a certain high-pitched voice that called out to us. "Hey Dimmons!" I turned around and I saw him dressed in all black with thick eyebrows and long black hair combed towards the back with fiery fingertips. "I want to talk to you."
Isaac hid behind me. "Oh no, it's that Damien kid! The son of Satan!" As far as I know, Damien Thorn is the son of Satan - this means that he has evil Satanic powers, as demonstrated from his fiery fingertips, and even though most of us lost our powers, he still has some, just because he is the son of Satan. No one ever talks to Damien and no one ever wants to mess with him, not after the rumors of him messing up Eric Cartman's ninth birthday party.
"Hush now, Isaac. I'm not here to mess with anyone." We were face to face with Damien, the school legend. "Listen, Isaac. Cole. I just want to thank you both for taking care of Terrorblade for me." Isaac stood by my left shoulder as we looked at each other in confusion, then turned back to Damien. Damien's tone was sincere and serious. "It was you both, Stan Marsh, Wendy Testaburger, and that one pink-haired new kid. The one everyone called Douchebag."
Why the hell does everyone keep referring to Ray as Douchebag? "His name is Raymond Irvington. Ray."
"So it is." Damien peered from side-to-side as he stepped closer. "Terrorblade was a real pain in the ass for my father, and you know how much of a pussy my father can be. I'm assuming you both uncovered his plot to cause a nuclear war so he could salvage the mess, right?" Isaac and I nodded silently and Damien continued on. "Just so you know, my father would never do that. No, he'd kill the world through temptation, not just outright destroying everything. It's not the way it should be, and I just want to say thank you both." Damien sighed. "Now I just gotta thank Stan and Wendy - because it's the kind thing to do. Yeah, I know 'Son of Satan' and 'kindness' going together sounds kind of silly, but it's necessary, what you did - it was legendary, honestly. But you know how difficult to catch them only with each other right? I swear to Satan I don't know why they're still together."
I can see what Damien is implying, but I'm also assuming Damien doesn't know about what went on with their relationship. "I think...they're together again." My voice was soft and cautious. I can only say what I interpreted of their relationship, but of course, I could always be wrong.
"Oh? Then perhaps it will be easy for me then." Damien then bowed down. "There is one more thing I want to say. The people you saw in Sovngarde...they might not still be in Sovngarde, just to say. Thank you again, Dimmons." He then walked away.
"Do you know what Damien means by Sovngarde?" I asked. That was very weird and somewhat random. But given this is Damien, and not some random kid, there's some foreshadowing going on.
Isaac and I looked at each other, and he shrugged. "Wow, Cole. I honestly thought...we were gonna get set aflame. And no, I don't know what he meant."
"So did I," I nod. "Uh...did let's just keep going."
"Agreed."
When the two of us rounded another corner, we both met up with our old friends Garet and Jenna. They greeted us with smiles, then Jenna leaned in to hug Isaac and me. "Oh my God, I'm so glad you two are ok!" Jenna then drew away from the hug. I then opened my locker to put my backpack in and closed it shut.
"Everyone in school knows what you two did," Garet replied. "It was amazing! You were all like 'pew pew' and Terrorblade was all like 'noooo'!"
I scratched the back of my head. "Uh, thanks. I didn't realize that this would all be told to everyone. How does everyone know?"
"You know how much of a gossip Wendy can be," Jenna said.
"Oh, right." Of course Stan and Wendy would tell everyone about how awesome our trip was. I kept it in the down-low simply because I just didn't want the attention of most of the South Park kids, and given the history of South Park, if everyone knows you, you should prepare for lots of weird shit to happen to you.
"So how were Stan and Wendy?" Jenna asked. "I never really talked to either of them, that's why I just want to know, and I know that Stan is like the perfect guy, and Wendy is like the perfect girl." Garet nodded in agreement. Of course, those were only Jenna's assumptions. After knowing the two of them, I can safely say that despite their popularity in school, they both have as much personal problems as Isaac and myself.
"They're nice people, but they both can be a bit stingy and emotional sometimes," Isaac said loudly. And I'm not? Haha.
"Keep your voice down, Isaac, they can probably hear you," Garet said.
"What?" I peered around the corner from where we came and all I could see are 2nd graders. "Uh, I don't see anything but 2nd graders."
"Rumor has it that the popular girls are using Lemmiwinks, your class gerbil, as a spy for themselves," Jenna said. "They attached a camera on him. Sort of like Eavesdropper, but not for public. And you know how sneaky Lemmiwinks can be."
I rolled my eyes. "Of course they are." How could I not see this coming? I guess this is the sort of thing the girls have.
"It's like the thought police," Isaac said.
"Um...yeah." I know what the term thought police is, but the girls wouldn't go that far...would they?
"Has any of you played WoW recently within the last week?" Garet asked.
"No, neither of us has been playing," Isaac replied. The four of us began to head upstairs to the 4th grade classrooms. After the events of last week, I don't think I want anything to do with WoW for a while, or any other video game for that matter.
And then the bell rung. "Oh shit, I'm already late. Alright, I'll be seeing you two later!" I waved to my friends.
"Bye, Cole!" The three of them waved.
I piled in Mr. Garrison's class to see all the other students fall soft to stare at me with neutral. Once again, it gave me that feeling of awkwardness, like when I first stepped in school today. I gulped so loudly I think everyone in the room can hear me. "Um...hi." I really hate all this attention.
"You're late again, Cole. Take your seat." I looked to see everyone in different desks. We must have moved seats. Mr. Garrison pointed at two empty desks next to each other. "The one next to Wendy." I peered to see that I'd be sitting in the 2nd row next to Wendy, who is next to Stan. Wonderful, this day just gets better and better, doesn't it? Without saying another word, I took my seat.
Mr. Garrison then took out a clipboard. "Ok, well unfortunately since my class database has been lost because of the stupid disaster that happened last week, I'm gonna have to call role manually, so say if you're here, and if you have a nickname you'd want to go by, please do so." Mr. Garrison then glared at Eric Cartman. "Except you, Eric, you smartass. Ok...Andrew Anderson?"
"Here."
"Karen Anderson?"
"Here."
"Bradley Biggle?"
"I go by Brad."
"Token Black?"
"Here."
"Kyle Broflovski?"
"Here."
"Lance Carlson?"
"Here."
"Eric Cartman?"
"Sup?"
"Melissa Daniels?"
"Here."
"Nichole Daniels?
"Cole Dimmons?"
"Here," I replied. Everyone was silent and no one looked at me funny. Good. I like it that way.
"Clyde Donovan?"
"Here."
"Lola Evans?"
"Here."
"Kathy Freeman?"
"Here."
"Hannah Hilton?"
"Here."
"Tyler Hoffman?"
"Here."
"Christopher Howard?"
"Here."
"Kal Jorgensen?"
"Here."
"Ellen Joseph?"
"Here."
"Millie Larsen?"
"Here."
"Kent Leone?"
"Here."
"Preston Marlowe?"
"Here."
"Stanley Marsh?"
"I go by Stan."
"Emily Marx?"
"Here."
"Tina Maxwell?"
"Here."
"Kenneth McCormick?"
"I go by Kenny."
"Jessie Mills?"
"Here."
"Annie Nelson?"
"Here."
"Francis Oswald?"
"Here."
"Bebe Stevens?"
"Here."
"Esther Stoley?"
"Here."
"Kevin Stoley?"
"Here."
"Leopold Stotch?"
"I go by Butters."
"Irving Stratford?"
"Here."
"Wendy Testaburger?"
"Here."
"Craig Tucker?"
"Here."
"Red Tucker?"
"Here."
"Heidi Turner?"
"Here."
"Sally Turner?"
"Here."
"Tweek Tweak?"
"H-h-here!"
"John Vanson?"
"Here."
"What?" our entire class said. Wait what? I thought that kid died months ago. I thought that kid was still in Sovngarde! I peered to my left to see John Vanson checking out Millie Larsen, who was right next to him to his right as Millie tried her best to scoot away, only bumping into Kyle. Everyone glared at John Vanson.
"Ugh, not this faggot again." Cartman rolled his eyes.
"ERIC CARTMAN, YOU WILL RESPECT OTHERS!" Mr. Garrison shouted.
From my right, I could hear Wendy whisper to Stan, who sat between Stan and I. "Oh no, it's that creep. He's gonna try to hit on my and my friends. Remember the beginning of fourth grade?"
"I thought we left him at Sovngarde." Stan then peered to me. "Right Wendy? Cole?" I shrugged in response. I don't know what to say. I have no idea how resurrection or the afterlife works - I've never died before, and I don't intend to experience death anytime soon.
"Um...who died?" That is all that came out of my mouth.
"Ok, quiet down children, we have two new students in this class today, even though it's really late in the year, I don't know..." Mr. Garrison looked at the door to the hallway. "...who should be here any second..." Nothing. "...any second now..." Then the door opened. Two kids our age came through the door, a girl, then a boy. My class stared like hawks at the new kids as if we are the predators and they're the prey, as per usual. New kids come into our 4th grade class sometimes, but they get scared off literally.
The girl has blonde hair that is tied in a ponytail and she wore a blue jacket with a dark green collar and black pants. I immediately recognized her to be Kelly Nelson, the girl whom we saved from the Twilight vampire attack. The boy had long pink hair and wore a green jacket and brown pants. Ray.
"Aw weak, not this betraying douchebag!" Cartman leaned back in his chair and rolled his eyes. Ray shot Cartman an angry glare.
"Eric, one more word out of your mouth and you're going to the principals office!" Mr. Garrison stood up seething. He then sat back down. "My apologies you two. Go on. Introduce yourselves."
Kelly introduced herself first. "Hello. I'm Kelly Nelson and I moved to Middle Park from Ohio, and now I'm here. I'm ten years old. I'm part of the Getting Gay with Kids choir so I know some of you in this room from our previous tour last year."
Ray then took his turn. "Hi. I'm Raymond Irvington, but you can tall me Ray. My name is not Douchebag." He glared in Cartman's direction, then turned back to the rest of us. "I moved here from Nebraska. and as you all know, I'm also Dovahkiin."
"Lovely to meet such interesting and wonderful children." Mr. Garrison's tone was very sardonic and sarcastic, usually whenever a new kid comes. "Take your seats." Kelly sat next to Kenny while Ray sat next to me.
I beam a smile full of delight. "Ray."
"Cole." Ray offered out a fist, and I fistbumped him. "Apparently the other Dovahkiin is here. I think his name is John."
"Yeah, I don't know how this happened." I honestly don't.
For the next hour or so, Mr. Garrison talked about how Maury Povich and his TV show is a cancer to society, then the morning recess bell rang. I piled out with Ray and the two of us met Isaac, Garet, and Jenna outside in the playground at the merry-go-round.
"So Ray, here's Isaac, and here's Garet and Jenna." I motioned towards the rest of my friends.
"So you're the Dovahkiin everyone talking about!" Garet said cheerily.
"Pleased to meet you, Ray," Jenna smiled. "Where'd you move from?"
"I moved here from Nebraska," Ray replied. "Small town just like this one."
"Why move at all?" Garet asked. "Not tryna be mean or anything. Just wondering."
"Well apparently I had to move here to get away from the government." Ray then turned to Isaac and me. "Or should I say Matt Parker. Thank God he's dead now."
"Matt Parker?" Jenna asked.
"He's just some big bad government guy," Ray replied. "It's just some..."
The five of us fell silent as we all turned our attention to the middle of the playground. It was most of the boys in my class along with John Vanson and Pip. Funny, Pip came back too. Which means I might see Chef and Ms. Ellen today. That said, the boys were busy yelling at John and Pip.
"Go away you freaks, no one wants you here!" Funny, same could be said to Cartman himself.
"Oh, you guys are so funny." John stifled a laught.
"Oh dear, John, I think they really mean it." Pip tried to tug on John's shoulder.
"Wait, didn't they both get stomped by Mecha-Streisand a few months back?" Jenna asked. "How are they still alive?"
"Maybe...they resurrected?" Garet tried to sound stupid. Of course though, he may well be right.
"Maybe...you're right." Jenna rarely ever agrees with Garet when he says something that is (or should be) stupid. "But how?" Jenna turned to Isaac and me for answers.
"I don't know." I really don't. But no matter, we just proceeded to sit back and enjoy the fun.
"John, no one likes you because you try so hard to be cool." Kyle walked back and forth between John and Pip. "You're not being yourself. You need to stop."
"Kyle, I know you're just saying that because you're trying to be funny," John said. Damn, this kid is really oblivious.
"No, John, we're all serious! You need to go away!" Stan yelled.
"Ask Pip, he'll tell you." Clyde twirled the football in his right hand.
"Comeon, John, we should really go," Pip said.
"Alright." John turned to walk towards the girls in the jungle gym as Pip followed.
"And don't you dare go near Wendy!" Stan shouted.
Of course though, John did walk up to the popular girls. "Hey ladies. Lookin' good."
"Ew!" the girls shouted. As one can see, subtlety was not John Vanson's strong point.
"What a creep!" Bebe said.
"Seriously go away, John!" Wendy yelled.
"Yeah, we're gonna get the boys to kick your ass!" Red added. The girls then turned to leave.
"Hey wait, come back!" John sauntered off after the girls with Pip on his tail. That's when I've noticed that neither Stan nor Wendy are hanging out like they promised to. But what do I know about relationships? It's whatever.
There was one thing that did rub me off the wrong way: yes, John was being a creep and a moron and in no way am I going to excuse this. However, this is just another situation of the popular guys just being assholes to the nerd because they are simply more popular. It seems old habits die hard, but there isn't much I can do about it now.
When we got back into class, I've noticed that Mr. Garrison was not here, but in his place was another woman. Ms. Ellen. "Ok class, Mr. Garrison has to leave for a bit and he won't be back until after lunch. Until then..." Ms. Ellen dug through Mr. Garrison's desk for a few minutes. "What the hell..." She then peered at the empty chalkboard then bent down. "Did Mr. Garrison leave a lesson plan anywhere? I can't seem to find one."
"No we usually talk about how Democrats should be fucked to death." Kenny more-or-less summed up Mr. Garrison's lessons nicely.
"Um...ok..." Ms. Ellen scratched her head. "Anyways..." She scribbled her name on the chalkboard. "My name is Ms. Ellen and I'll be your substitute teacher from now until lunch. Anyways we're going to do a little activity I call 'Circle Time'."
"Aw, weak dude!" Cartman groaned.
"You. I know you, Eric, so keep quiet." Ms. Ellen's voice was low and threatening. "Now basically, you're all just talking about yourselves."
"Ahahahah, that sounds so lame!" Cartman began to laugh as everyone else glared at him.
"Eric, you will shut up right now before I send you to the principal's office!" Ms. Ellen yelled. "Now...you can assemble." We all arranged the desks into one big circle. I took at seat between Butters and Sally. It was awkward at first. We were waiting for Ms. Ellen to tell us what to do. "Well all you need to do is just talk to each other. You know, like normal kids." Ms. Ellen began to walk around for a bit.
"Why do we need to do this?" Lola asked.
"Well I'm sure that making friends with others is way more productive than being taught how Maury Povich is a cancer to society, right?" Well Ms. Ellen does have a good point right there. "Besides, I'm sure you can spread your friendships to those you don't know." Real funny. My heartbeats are quite quick since these people honestly make me nervous.
There was silence in the class for a few moments. Then Kyle turned to speak. "Well everyone already knows everyone here so I'm not actually sure why we're doing this."
"Yeah..." Craig's voice trailed off until his eyes fell on me. Then everyone else's eyes fell on me. My gut almost bursted from the nervousness.
"Um...hi?" That's all that came out of my mouth.
"So you and your brother were the ones who were with Stan and Wendy last week when you left town," Annie said.
"Yeah," I replied. "I did."
"So how was it?" Token asked. "The trip."
"It was fine," I replied. "It was fun." I guess I'm going to be the center of attention now.
"Hey, Wendy told us about what you did," Red said, "and that was pretty cool of you to help her like that. By the way, have you guys seen the new kid? He's totally hot!"
"He really is!" Esther added.
While the girls chatted on about Ray, Kyle then turned to the rest of us. "Stan, I have a big problem. You know how in preschool-"
"Trent Boyette is out of jail," Stan interrupted.
"Yeah, wait, how do you know?" Kyle asked.
"Wendy and I ran into him and well we got in a fight, as you'd expect...wait, where is he now?" Stan looked around the room.
"Apparently he's living in Middle Park now," Kenny replied. "Although seriously, I'd rather him be in North Park."
"Nononononono!" Stan shook his head. "He should not step anywhere near North Park!"
"Why not Stan?" Butters asked. "He tried to beat us up remember?"
"Trust me, Middle Park is fine," Stan replied, "Not North Park though." Speaking of North Park, apparently all of the fourth graders in North Park did survive the Nazi Zombie attack, even Harry Potter.
The next hour consisted of the girls talking about how hot Ray is. And then afterwards, it was lunch time. As I headed out to see my friends, I was stopped by Stan and Wendy. "Hey, Cole, I have some bad news," Wendy said.
"Hm?" I'm not sure what to expect to be honest.
"Remember what we talked about that one night, where you admitted who was hot?" Ah, I remember now, it was back after we fought PETA. "Well, I tried to matchmake you with Heidi, but she's not interested. Sorry."
I shrugged. I almost completely forgot about her, she nearly slipped my mind. No matter. I wasn't planning on dating her anyways. "It's fine."
"You're okay with it?" Stan asked.
"Yeah." I nodded.
"Alright, we'll be seeing you." Stan and Wendy waved goodbye to me as they headed off towards the cafeteria.
I joined Isaac, Garet, and Jenna at the lunch line. However, Ray was no present at all. We got to where they would be serving food, and surely enough it was Jerome McElroy, or Chef. "Chef!" we all exclaimed
"Hello there children!" Chef then smiled at me. "Cole, Isaac. I remember what you did." I'm sure everyone does. "How are you both this fine day?"
"We're good," Isaac and I both said. Chef gave us both two slices of combination pizza. Afterwards, the four of us then sat down at a table - a table right next to the popular girls'.
"Man, look at how far we've all come," Isaac said.
"I'll say, you guys were awesome out there!" Garet cheered. "You'll both be popular for weeks!"
"Yeah, until I eventually become forgotten about then unpopular again." Why does it take so much effort to be cool at school? I swear, it's more difficult than obtaining a computer science degree.
"Looks like the new kid already forgot about us. Look."
I followed Jenna's index finger onto the popular boys' table, which like the popular girls', sat twenty boys: nineteen of them were Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Clyde, Token, Tweek, Kevin, Francis, Kent, Andrew, Lance, Bradley, Chris, Preston, Irving, and Tyler. Not changing at all is one thing, but stealing Ray away is another. Therefore I got to the middle of the cafeteria. "Everyone, I have an announcement to make: Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny had Trent Boyette sent to jail, and Wendy shot Ms. Ellen to the sun!"
There were murmurs amongst the cafeteria, but then Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny stood up from their seats, enraged. "Cole, what the FUCK?!" they all shouted.
Wendy stood up from her table as well. "Seriously what the hell?!"
"I saw the way you all treated John Vanson today, and really, I shouldn't be surprised! You're still all shallow high schoolers!" But this time, I didn't want to give them a chance to respond. Sticking my middle fingers into the air, I left the cafeteria, never to be seen again for the rest of the day.
Well, that's a wrap, folks. I changed the ending of this dramatically as I hated the original ending, and I wanted a better transition into the sequel.
