Hi! Everyone thanks for reviewing and following this story. I plan on trying to update every weekend if I can. Next weekend it might not happen until Monday due to a weekend camp I am going to. I greatly appreciate your reviews. I was surprised that I had as many as I did and all were so kind. I hope you enjoy this chapter. It does answer some of the questions some of you had! Enjoy!

Chapter 2: Sarah vs The Unplanned

Late February 2012

The kiss wasn't magical like both Chuck and Sarah had hoped. She wants to feel it but she heard their story, kissed him, and she still doesn't. She thinks she may care for him. Hell, she probably does. But she needs to figure herself out. She opens her mouth to tell him and before she can even get the words out, he tells her he knows and will always be there for her. She promises to check in with him and they part ways. Sarah goes to the airport and Chuck goes home.

When she steps off the plane, she heads to NSA headquarters where General Beckman is located. Sarah contacted the General before going to the beach not long after she left castle. She needs something she knows, and that spy life is that. It is the only things she knows. The General agreed to meet with her.

"You know you have to be cleared. You need to pass both a physical and a psych test." The General states as Sarah nods. The General gives Agent Walker a stern look. She doesn't think the Agent is okay and ready, but she knows the Agent won't stop until she gets her way, so she'll call in the tests. "I'll call the doctors than and you can head to the CIA's doctor's office. Since you have had the intersect, we have to use a specialist, Dr. Leo Dreyfus, for you psych exam."

With that Sarah turns and leaves, surprised with how easy it was to get the General agree to the tests. She drives straight to the hospital where the CIA doctors are and goes to get her physical out of the way first. The exam is long as she has been out of the game for almost a year. The last thing she has done is get her blood drawn and they tell her, she can leave, and they will call her when the entire exam results are compiled into a conclusive report and with that, she heads over to psych.

Sarah is pissed when she finds out Beckman is making her see a specialist who is in Chicago at the moment. She to her car to drive back to NSA headquarters where the General's office is located to ask to see someone else but gets a phone call telling her to come back to the doctor's office immediately. She does as she was told and enters the CIA doctor's office.

"Agent Walker, I need you need to sit down, please," the doctor informed Sarah as she enters the room.

Sarah sits down because just from the look on the doctor's face, she knows it isn't going to be good. She nods to let the doctor know she can continue.

The doctor looks down at the report in her hands, "Your blood tests show an abnormality," the doctor pauses trying to find the words. She knows for most Agents it is hard for them to hear her next words, but for this Agent in particular, she is worried about the reaction because she knows she is missing the previous five years, "The abnormalities are consistent with a pregnancy, Agent Walker. "

"I can't be. I have an IUD," Sarah answers back in denial.

"You had your IUD taken out in September as it expired and instead of having it replaced, decided to go on the pill. It is written here that you and your husband were thinking of a family. I know it is a shock considering what has happened." The doctor states the facts written before her and pauses waiting for the Agent to say something. The Agent doesn't say anything, so the doctor continues to talk, "You have options, but I do suggest talking to someone before you make your decisions."

Sarah sits there in shock and tears start to stream down her face. The doctor preforms an ultrasound to make sure it is a baby and not a tumor or something causing her hormones to be thrown off. The ultrasound shows she is positively pregnant, and the doctor tells her she is about 12 weeks. She thinks she knows what she is going to do and schedules the appointment to have it done without talking to someone even though the doctor tells her repeatedly she should. It's her body, her choice and her days are limited to make a decision. She knows once the baby starts to actually form, she won't be able to do it. She can't have a baby now. She barely knows the man it was created with.

She goes to her hotel room and sits down on her bed and just cries. She cries until she doesn't have it in her anymore. She cannot be anyone's mother. She wants someone to talk to, but in the last five years everyone has changed at least some.

She gets up the next day and heads to her appointment. It is not in with a CIA doctor, but a clinic. She has to fill out some forms and sits there unsure how to answer questions about herself. She goes for her phone to see who she could call to get the information from. She sees her mom's name and freezes.

She thinks about Molly and how that is the only experience she remembers at least with a baby. She remembers rescuing her, but her memories end before she gave the baby to her mom. That is where her memory loss starts. Chuck had told her about the little girl and her mom when they were on the beach.

Sarah isn't exactly sure why she calls her mom in that moment she does. Her and her mom have never exactly been close for multiple reason, but Emma always says just what Sarah needs to hear. She ends up just talking to her about everything and none of the questions she needed to answer. It is the first time she has talked to her since she lost her memories and she is surprised to find her mother had talked to Chuck and he filled her in on the incident. She listens to her mom talk about the little girl that her mom raised as her own, the little girl she rescued. Her mom changes the subject to Sarah and Chuck and how they met. Somehow that gets her mom into her and Chuck's pre memory loss plans to start a family and how she thought she was pregnant. Her mom tells her how she took a pregnancy test not too long ago and it came out negative and she was disappointed. Chuck didn't tell her that part of their story.

Those words get Sarah to think about how much the baby has been through. It has been growing in her since before Christmas. She knows a man name Daniel Shaw tortured her on Christmas, she got into a fight with Ryker, she downloaded the intersect, lost her memories, and was tortured by Quinn. Her body has been through so much, but the baby held on. It was loved even though they thought it was just a concept. She decides she just can't go through with her original plan.

Sarah gets up and hands the paperwork back to the front desk and walks out of the clinic still talking to her mom. When they say goodbye, Sarah has already made it back to her hotel room. She feels calm and has made a decision different than her original one. It is obvious her previous self-had wanted this. Maybe somewhere deep down, she realizes she wants it also. She can't kill the baby whose life hasn't even had a chance to start just like she couldn't kill Molly or even leaving it to chance that she could.

That night, Sarah comes up with a plan. She decides she'll carry this pregnancy to term while working with psych to be cleared as she realizes right now, they won't clear her. She is too unstable, to emotional. Then she'll have the baby and give it to her husband. She'll go back into the spy game.

….

August 3, 2012

It has been months since his wife left him and all Chuck Bartowski can do is hope that she will return. He gets texts once a week from her telling him she is okay. He has talked to General Beckman and even though, Beckman says she must respect Sarah wishes of not telling Chuck what she is doing for the CIA, the General tells him she is doing well. Sarah doesn't answer any of the questions he texts her and hasn't actually talked to anyone since she talked to Emma a few days after she left Burbank.

Chuck blames himself for her leaving. Everyone argues with him of that fact. They all give their inputs and reasons, but Chuck knows he pushed her a little hard, a little too fast and he knows he shouldn't have immediately turned down her idea of joining the CIA. The regret is in his mind every day, but it happened and there is nothing to change that moment.

He is back working at the Buy More and going about his everyday life. No spies, no missions, no Sarah, no Casey. Besides Alex, his mom, Sarah's mom, and Molly, it feels like he is back in the life he had five years ago, minus living with his sister and Devon. They aren't even in the same state anymore, but still talk daily.

Despite it being like five years earlier, he admits he is in a better mind set then previously. He is actively working on different projects on the side and trying his hardest to get out of the place that always sucks him back in. Today is his day off and he plans on staying home and submitting job applications all day. He sits down at the kitchen table and starts going through emails, when there is a knock at the door. He sighs and heads to the door expecting Morgan. He is totally shocked when he opens the door to his wife holding a tiny little bundle and a couple of bags.

"Sarah!?" Chuck practically screams waking up the tiny thing in his wife's arms. Chuck's face changes to a look of happiness then back to a look of shock as the baby screams while Sarah's gets even more panicked than it already was.

"Can I come in? We have a lot to talk about" Sarah asks as she tries to quiet the baby. The last 48 hours have been rough, and all Sarah wants to do is pass this tiny thing on to someone else.

"Yeah, it's your apartment, too." He says as he moves out the way to let her in. He doesn't know

They sit on the couch where they have had so many different conversations in the apartment they used to share, and Sarah tells Chuck what has been going in her life during the months since the day she left Burbank. She tells Chuck about how she found out she was having a baby she didn't exactly want and remember creating. She tells him almost everything leaving out her plans to get rid of the baby before its life even started. She tells him about her work and her plans to rejoin the CIA as she has now passed her psych tests and all she does is have to heal from the birth of the little thing that has now been passed into Chuck's arms.

After she is done with her story and telling Chuck her future plans on going back to the CIA, they sit there in silence. Chuck sits there in shock and tries to process the fact that his wife had their baby they were planning on having. The one they were dreaming of before Quinn stole their life, their future. He is amazed that she stayed away for so long going through her pregnancy all by herself and decided to have the baby at all. He goes through her words again and again and realizes she is going to leave them, leave her little girl who she has just spent the last 9 months connected to.

"You're going leave us." is all Chuck manages to choke out. He is in complete shock holding the little miracle in his arms.

"I just can't do this. I can't be here. I am not ready to be a mom. I am not your wife. I am not the Sarah Walker you want, and I am not sure I can be her again. Nothing is coming back. I am not sure it will."

"Sarah, you'll always be my Sarah. I'll always love you. She'll need you. I'll need you," Chuck sniffles letting the tears roll down his face.

"I am just not ready, Chuck," she protests.

"Will you ever be?" Chuck says trying not to get loud in fear of waking the sleeping child on his chest.

Sarah shrugs. But doesn't say anything.

Chuck looks at his broken wife who appears to even be a shell of the Sarah Walker he first the day after he downloaded the intersect. A shell of the women he made love to the first time to in Paris. A shell of his wife and even a shell of the women that left him a few months ago. At that moment, he knows that there is no changing her mind. That if he begs her to stay, she won't. If he somehow manages to get her to stay, she won't be happy. They won't be happy. She isn't ready to be a part of this life. He must let her go again even though it pains him.

"Does she have a name?" Chuck asks after he gets tired of the silence and Sarah immediately shakes her head, so Chuck continues, "Anything in mind?"

"She was a month early I honestly did even start. But I saw her, and I thought Amelia would be perfect. I don't know why. It just came into my head when she was put into my arms, but you should name her whatever you want, Chuck. She is your daughter." She admits looking at the tiny baby on Chuck's chest.

"Sarah, you might be in denial, but she is yours also. I think Amelia is a fantastic name for this little girl," Chuck pauses thinking and trying not to cry again, "How does Amelia Hope Bartowski sound?"

"Chuck, it sounds perfect," Sarah rushes out, getting up to leave.

"Sarah, just check in, okay? and don't forget that you have a family that loves you and you will be always welcome here," Chuck reminds her as he watches his wife leave for the fourth time in a year.

As the door shuts behind his wife, he looks at the baby on his chest.

"Looks like it's just me and you, Little Miss Millie. Just me and you," he says with a sad smile.