Songs: First Aid Kit - Walk Unafraid; Charlie Parr - 1922 Blues

We were all standing in front of Moxxi's bar and waited for her to tell us what she wanted us to do. Something about this sounded really, really important, so everyone felt they had to go. Even Anouk. Moxxi looked like she was a little overwhelmed by the sheer crowd of people standing at her bar.

"Okay, so... In case you didn't know, my son, Scooter, he... well, he died recently. He went out the way I always saw him: as a hero. I've said my own goodbyes, but before we rushed off Sanctuary, I found an ECHO in Scooter's things. Says it's for you, Vault Hunters." Moxxi said to us and carefully placed an ECHO recorder on the counter. So this was really important.

We all waited for a second, unsure of who should pick up the ECHO from the counter. It felt like it would be a massive honour to do it and none of us really wanted to assume they were the chosen one.

"Just... just take it. Nova?" Moxxi said to us. Okay. That looked like I was the chosen one. I carefully took the ECHO recorder from the counter and pressed play as everyone else gathered around me.

"Hey, Vault Hunter! In the highly likely event that I got deadened by like, a dinosaur, or a big explosion or somethin', I heres-to-by name you the Executioner of my last william best-ament."

"Oh, my sweet, dumb boy." Moxxi said quietly and sighed. I could count the times I had Moxxi seen sad on one hand and this was one of those times.

"Okay! First off, collect all my best girly mags for posterior-ity! Once you done got all them skin rags, you make sure and find 'em a good home, 'kay?" Scooter's voice said. I paused the recording.

"Alright, then, there are some locations here... three of them. Are we splitting up to go and find them?" I asked.

"Sure. Let's do it." Maya replied. I nodded and sent the locations to everyone standing around me.

"I'll go with Maya and Krieg." Salvador said.

"I suppose that leaves me to go with Zero?" Axton asked.

"If you want, then Gaige, Anouk and I will get the third one." I replied. There were nods all around and we gathered up in small groups.

"Alright, ladies, let's get a car and get this done. I'm starting to worry about Mordecai again." I said to them, as we went towards the Catch-A-Ride.

"How is he doing?" Gaige wanted to know.

"He's been having a nap when Anouk and I got back, so I didn't want to wake him. He seems really tired and exhausted and... sorry. Let's just not talk about it, okay?" I replied quickly.

"Don't worry. We'll find a way. Somehow." Gaige answered and smiled at me. I smiled back weakly.

"Thanks, Gaige. That's nice of you to say." I said.

"I'm not just saying it, you know. I mean, we found a way to replace your leg and make it, like, way cooler than before and no one thought that was gonna happen anytime soon." she replied.

"Yeah, I suppose. I'd just rather not dwell on all the options, you know?" I told her as I requested a car and waited for it to finish digistructing. We all hopped into the car and drove off towards the location I had picked for ourselves. It wasn't that far from the camp, so we could go back anytime, if we needed to.

"Okay, guys, we got one here called Chestworld. Anything on the recording for that?" Axton echoed as we were getting closer to our marked location.

"Hold on a second, I'll check... Yup, there is." I told him and played the recording for everyone on the line.

"Chestworld was definitely one of my favorite strainin' manuals. I mean, shoot, I never did meet a bustier I didn't like. Momma taught me that word, mmmm hm mm." Scooter's voice said. I didn't really want to laugh, but that just made me giggle a little. Scooter has always been a boobs guy and we've had many conversations about that. For some reason that was never weird or awkward once we had broken up. I heard Moxxi sigh loudly over the ECHOnet.

"Mordecai, honey, Scooter asked us to find a home for his, uh... wagmags. You interested?" she asked next.

"Oh, wow, uh... that's... I really couldn't accept such a... generous offer." Mordecai echoed back and coughed. If Moxxi tried to give Scooter's girlie mags away to people among the Raiders she'd probably have a bad time.

"We're here." Gaige said and I braked hard. We climbed out of the car and looked around for it, expecting it to be on some crates or something like that. But then I found it. It was just lying there, in the sand. It showed a woman holding a rakk. The title was Racks & Rakks, which was admittedly pretty creative.

"We got one, too." I echoed the rest of the group and started playing Scooter's recording again.

"Racks & Rakks is THE premiere quarterly for those interested in hot babes holdin' onta scary birds! Kind of a particular demographic, but I ain't here to yuck anybody's yum, know what I'm sayin'?"

"Brick? Scooter wanted us to find someone to take his porn stash. Any interest?" Moxxi chimed in again. I just shook my head. If Moxxi had no success with Mordecai, then Brick was even more unlikely to take Scooter's porn stash.

"Hell nah, I ain't tryna see that." Brick replied promptly.

"We found ours as well, guys. Hit the play button." Maya echoed us right after that. We headed back towards the camp, as I played the message for the last magazine.

"I know Siren's Call ain't got real pic-a-tures of real Sirens but uh, that ol' fap fiction still gots the job done! Haaaa!" Scooter's voice said. In my head, I could see Lilith cringing at that. Hard.

"Hey, Vaughn? Any chance you're looking for some lightly-used girlie mags?" Moxxi tried one last time with a sigh. Okay, Vaughn was kind of a wildcard here. I'd expect any answer from him.

"Aw, gee. Gosh, that's a real nice offer, but um... Uh, no? Bandit liiiiife!" he replied to her. Poor Moxxi. Vaughn might have actually worked.

"Well. Waste not, I guess. Just bring 'em back to me, and I'll hold on to them for now." Moxxi echoed us.

"Now this time, I'ma predict that y'all took a quick boomer break in the dookie hut. Like right now. Right when you're listenin' to this. Enjoy that dook, y'all!" was the last bit we heard from Scooter's recording, as we got back to the camp and handed Moxxi the magazines. She took them and stashed them away in a small safe.

"For my next predict-she-ow-nay, I bet everyone got into a freakin' free-for-all riot to get their mitts on those primo tissue issues. Extrasensory future sight, y'all! WOOOO!" Scooter's voice said when I played the next bit of the recording. Uncomfortable looks all around and an awkward silence, as I paused the ECHO recorder.

"Okay. That was all extremely uncomfortable. But now that it's over, let's see what else he wants." Moxxi finally broke the silence. I would have never thought Moxxi was uncomfortable with anything, but it seemed like she could be full of surprises. Who would have thought Moxxi could be embarrassed?

"For my next last wishes, I officially transfer ownership of the most sweetest-ass business on Pandora, to my most favoritest sister. I'm talkin' about Ellie." Scooter said next. I paused the recording again and looked at Moxxi questioningly.

"What are you looking at me for? Call Ellie over here, so she can hear this!" she said to me. Right. My brain was getting kind of foggy as all the memories of Scooter came back. That, and Mordecai being infected with that plant virus just had turned my brain into mush right there and then.

"Oh, Scooter." Moxxi mumbled with another sigh.

"Ellie, can you come over here for a second? It's really important." I echoed her.

"Sure, I'm on my way." she replied. It didn't take long until she got over to us. We all looked at her, a sad expression on our faces. It must have been a pretty amusing sight, if it wasn't such a sad occasion.

"Well, hey there, cutie pies! What's this all about?" Ellie asked, after none of us said anything.

"Ellie, Scooter wants you to run the Catch-a-Ride." Moxxi said to her when none of us really answered.

"Aw, dang. I knew this day was comin'. It was nice just hearin' his voice comin' out of those janky-ass speakers, but... I'll do it." Ellie replied. I held up the recorder and pressed play again.

"Ellie, if you're listenin' to this, it means I've become a super-ghost on that big racetrack in the sky, drivin' ghost cars round the sun an' shit. Sorry, sis. I'm sure you're real sad and all, but you gots ta keep them runners runnin' for me, okay?"

"Bye bye, Scoot. And... thank you. Welp, guess we'd better record some new lines for the Catch-a-Ride, huh?" Ellie said after that. I was close to tears again. God, I really missed Scooter. And I kind of wished I could hold onto his Catch-A-Ride lines forever, but Ellie was right. We had to move on at some stage and this was what Scooter wanted. I mean, we were hearing it out of his own mouth.

"Alright, I'll record them, you go down to the Catch-A-Ride and see how it sounds, okay?" Ellie suggested.

"I'll go!" Salvador offered and ran down towards the station.

"This is where the cars live! Get you one!" Ellie's voice came from the Catch-A-Ride. No. It just didn't sound right. Ellie was shaking her head.

"Hm. It don't feel right aping his catch-phrases like that. Tell you what, gimme some time and I'll come up with some new ones." Ellie said to us.

"It says something about transferring ownership here..." Salvador said to us next.

"Oh yeah. Let's do it." Ellie replied.

"This feels like the end of an era." I mumbled.

"It does, doesn't it? Anyway... Alright! Looks like the transfer is complete. Why don'tcha give it a whirl?" she replied.

"Get you a Big Beautiful War Machine right here, y'all! Catch-a-Riiiiide!" we heard Ellie's voice coming from Salvador's ECHO.

"Yeah, that sounds pretty good." Axton said and gave Ellie a smile.

"Thanks, Vault Hunters. Let's see what else Scooter wanted you to do." Moxxi answered. She seemed relieved that this had gone over well.

"And finally, whence-fifth I depart from this mortal plane, do me the honor of reverently laying down a totally righteous memorial in my name, then do A SICK-ASS BOOSTER JUMP OVER THAT THANG! WOOO!" Scooter said.

"I've actually been workin' on a li'l something at his final-resting-place-slash-impact-crater. Why don'tcha meet me on out there and see what I whipped up?" Ellie suggested. I couldn't believe she hadn't told us about this earlier.

We all went out to get cars for ourselves (which took a good while, since we were a pretty big group now) and drove towards the place Ellie had marked for us on the map. It was a pretty easy-going drive out into the desert. The memorial itself was a massive platform with a ramp from which you could do a huge jump in a car. It was perfect. There was a billboard there as well, but it wasn't lit up. We all climbed up on top of the platform to where Ellie was standing.

"Now I'm sure you done gone and passed out from dehydration on account of cryin' over me, but don't you worry. I lived my life exactly the way I wanted to, even when - no, ESPECIALLY when folks told me not to! Rules is for FOOLS! I made that up just now, I'm a genius! Death ain't holding back my brilliant mind!" Scooter's message said next.

"Okay, this ramp? I'd do a sick ass jump over that any time." I said to Ellie. Salvador nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, I know. It's pretty awesome. But I think it needs just one final touch, don't you? I couldn't decide between righteous flames of furious fury, or sick-ass danger-arcs of electric badassery. Do whatever you think is right, Vault Hunter." Ellie said.

"Scooter always struck me as a fire kinda guy..." Axton remarked.

"Yeah, same." Maya agreed.

"So we'll go with fire?" Gaige wanted to know. There were nods all around.

"So fire it is?" Ellie confirmed one last time.

"Yeah. Fire." I replied. She went over to light up the memorial. There were flames spewing out all along the ramp. It looked badass. If Scooter could have seen this, he would have loved it.

"Maaannn, that's lookin' sweet! Now it's time to christen this bad boy! Go ahead and show me one of them Outrunner boost jumps over this thing! Let's get this freakin' party started!" Ellie said. We all went and got a car - all eight of us - and lined up to do the jump one after the other. We didn't even need to talk about it, it was just the most logical thing to us. Anything else wouldn't have made sense.

Just before we went down I pressed the play button on the recorder again. I was sure Scooter would want us to hear his last few words as we did the sickass jump to remember him. Then we all went down. I pressed the booster button just in time to gather enough speed to get up over the ramp.

"Catch-a-riiiiiiiiiiide!"

It was like Scooter was right there with everyone of us. It was then that the billboard lit up as well, showing Scooter's face the way he used it on his ads. I didn't really have time to read what it said, but everything about this was just amazing. This was truly the best way to remember Scooter.

"Hooo-leee crapsicles! That was amazing! Scooter would be so happy if he coulda seen that righteous badassery! You did right by him. Thanks, V-H." Ellie echoed us from the top of the platform, just as I managed to get the car to stop.

"I know Scooter wasn't exactly everyone's cup of tea, but he was a good man. And that's one hell of a rare thing on Pandora. It would have meant a lot to Scooter that you did all this. It did to me. Thank you, Vault Hunters." Moxxi said next. She was right. Scooter was one of the best, no doubts about it. He might have been a bit peculiar at times, but she sure raised him well.

"And for my finalest of final words. I just wanna say... thanks. I always wanted to be a Vault Hunter, but never really had the stuff for it. Y'all gave me a cause worth fightin' for, an' made me feel like family. And since we all family now, y'all gotta look out for my best girls, Ellie and Moxxi, 'kay? And as for me? I gotta catch me a ride to heaven, y'all."