A/N: I am almost finish with the semester with only ONE class of finals left to grade. I'm so ecstatic, I'm posting another chapter. I'l probably do another on Sunday. So make sure you leave me your thoughts. I really like reading them. Some of you are totally guessing some future stuff...some of you...keep reading.

This is unbeta'd so forgive my errors. I've read it a hundred time to try to find them all.


My eyes flicked to Jake on and off over the past hour. Waking up in his arms was so…wonderful.

And wrong.

I paced in Charlie's room, back and forth. I know I was probably wearing a groove in the new tile. In between worrying about Charlie being in surgery, I ran over the events of the night before. Thank Taha Aki that my alarm woke me up two minutes before Dr. Cullen came into the room and I was no longer sprawled across Jake's body. That would have been way too awkward.

Last night, Jake made me remember all the reasons I loved him. We were both very clear about what last night was—just two old friends comforting each other during a difficult time. It was wonderful and liberating.

But today had to be different.

"Mrs. Cullen," a nurse I didn't know called, "your father is out of surgery. Dr. Cullen will be here in a few minutes to talk with you." She must have been one that came up from Seattle. For one, she called me Mrs. Cullen and everyone here called me Bella.

"Thank you. Is he alright?" I asked, biting my lip and twisting the end of my braid.

"I'm not at liberty to say," she said apologetically.

"Is he still fucking breathing? Can you tell us that?" Jake growled as he stood up. His hands were uncharacteristically shaking.

"Jake," I hushed. The nurse was unperturbed and smiled at him.

"Yes, sir. He is still breathing," she said a little more apologetically. She must handle upset family members quite a bit because she was kind and conciliatory. Jake's face melted from worried fueled anger into remorse.

"I'm sorry," he said and flopped down in the chair with a sigh.

"No, I completely understand, sir. No need to apologize." She gave a little nod and left the room.

"Jake, I've made some decisions," I began. I wanted to get this out before Carlisle came in. He looked up at me, concerned.

"Edward thinks I'm a fool. He has this idealized version of who I am and what his wife should be," I explained. "I didn't see that before I came back here, but now I do. I think that's his deepest fear whether he realizes it or not. I have to be who he thinks I am until I can figure some things out."

"Bells, you're a terrible liar. We all know that," he said. And he was right. But I wouldn't be lying. And I said as much.

"Jake, I've been playing this role for that past ten years. Well," I bit my lip considering, "for about the past eight. You see, he broke up with me for a bit when I went to a party with some friends and ended up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning. He said he couldn't be associated with someone who would tarnish his name. But after a few weeks, he came back to me and said he missed me. So I began to be…Isabella."

"Bells," he began, but I held up my hand.

"I know how stupid it sounds now. Believe me. I've been thinking about this since they rolled Charlie outta here and into surgery. That and how it felt being with you again," I finished, looking down at my shoes.

"Bells, he can never get wind of that," he said, vehemently.

"Oh, I know. I can't even let him ever suspect you're my ex-boyfriend. He's become so jealous over the past year or so." I didn't vocalize that I thought he was having an affair. I didn't have any proof other than making connections last night as I paced the room.

"Okay," he replied.

"And we can't seem like we're corroborating in any way," I said.

"That won't be hard, we aren't," he said. "But just like you warned me about you falling back in your role, I'm going to have to fall back into mine. He's gonna do some digging on me. He's going to find out who I am and what I do. Hell, he probably already knows I'm set to inherit the land that was gifted to my grandfather. If he's half the businessman he claims to be, he'll have someone digging up anything on me. Good thing my womanizing is the worst thing I've done." He looked down a little ashamed.

I didn't quite understand what he was saying, but I think he was asking me not to believe what I might hear if and when any dirt came up.

"Bella!" Dr. Cullen called entering the room in green scrubs and Dr. Gerandy right behind him in blue. "Everything went very well. Jacob, as grateful as I am for your blood donation yesterday, I am happy to report that we didn't need it because the procedure was textbook. He should be awake soon."

"Oh, thank you, Dr. Cullen!" I gushed. I crossed and gave Dr. Cullen a big hug. He chuckled and hugged me back.

"Such wonderful news to bring my new found daughter-in-law. And please," he pulled back and looked at me, "call me Carlisle." I nodded.

"Thank you, Carlisle," I added.

"I'm going to go do some paperwork," Dr. Gerandy said with a satisfied smile. "I'm so relieved and I learned quite a bit. I'll see you soon, Bella. Jake," he nodded before he left the room.

"You should be able to see him in about an hour," Carlisle announced with a wide smile. I knew so little about him, but I already liked him. I didn't know if I should tell Edward. I didn't know what to tell Edward about anything.

"I need to call Edward," I announced. I must have sounded stressed because Jake looked at Dr. Cullen and Carlisle looked at me and frowned. I sent some terse responses to his asinine texts. That's what made me decide I had to fall back into the role.

"I'm sorry he wasn't here with you," he said. I pulled out my phone and found his contact.

"Me, too," I said.

"I'm not," Jake muttered. My stomach flipped, remembering the pleasant night we'd spent catching up. I stamped that feeling back down. Being near Jacob again was so confusing. It made me realize I didn't like who'd I'd become. I frowned at him, hoping Carlisle didn't hear him and pressed the dial button.

"Isabella?" Edward asked. Like, who else would it be? My name popped up on his caller ID every time I called. I turned away from Jake and Carlisle who started discussing the new equipment in the OR. I walked towards the window that overlooked the parking lot.

"Yes," I answered, unable to hide the irritation in my voice.

"How is your father, Love?" he asked. Well, at least he led with that. I poked at the grout on the window sill.

"He's going to be fine. Your father says the procedure went really well," I said the last part a little timidly.

"Well, good," he replied. "You have been so worried and I am glad that everything is going to be okay, now. My business here will be concluded early tomorrow morning and I'll be up there around lunch time. Do you want to show me La Push after you're sure that your father is on the mend?" he asked.

I was thrown a little off guard. Firstly, he'd totally ignored that his father was here. And secondly, he wanted to pretend like he hadn't abandoned me and left me up here to deal with this alone. And if his business would be concluded early in the morning, why couldn't he have stayed last night? Well, I was pretty sure I knew why. I just didn't want to believe it. I placed my hand on the glass. It was cold and the gray skies matched what I was feeling. Hadn't I just been so happy and relieved just a few moments ago?

"Bella?" he asked. I realized I hadn't answered him.

"Sure," I said back. I hoped I didn't sound as confused as I felt. I only had until tomorrow to figure some stuff out. I looked out across the parking lot and my heart fluttered at my truck. I couldn't believe what good shape it was in. It made me so happy to drive it.

"Great. How about I pick some things up for us to eat and you gather some blankets and decide where it is you want to take me," he said. He sounded happy and even a little excited.

"Okay," I agreed. I wasn't even sure that Charlie was going to be well enough by the time he got here, but I guess that Jake could look after him for a while, or Billy. "So I'll see you this afternoon?" I asked. Maybe he'd let me drive the truck. It'd add to the whole experience.

"I'll text you tomorrow morning when I leave and give you a more precise ETA," he said.

"Okay. I'll talk to you then," I said. I felt more numb than excited.

"I love you," he said.

"Me, too," I said. And I hung up. I stared out the window for a few more moments, the cold window leeching the heat from my hand.

"Bella?" Carlisle called, concerned.

"I told him you were here and just completely ignored that fact," I said, finally turning around. I tried to look him in the eye, but I just couldn't. Jake took a seat in a nearby chair.

"I'd like to say that I'm surprised, but I can't," he said mildly. He took a seat across from Jake and invited me to do the same. I sat in the chair next to Jake. "Bella, when my wife died, Edward was very young. She chose not to seek treatment, because the prognosis was not good. Against my own wishes and inclinations, I supported her choice. Edward resents me for not forcing my wife to accept treatment. He blames me for her death."

"But that's silly," I said.

"Remember, he was very young," Carlisle tried to explain again. "He's never worked through the anger stage."

"Doesn't give him the right to be a controlling asshole," Jake muttered.

"Jake," I hissed. Carlisle looked between Jake and me and then back at Jake. Jake didn't look the least bit repentant.

"Is he controlling?" he asked, his eyes shifting back to me.

"Well, I didn't think so," I replied. But I didn't know anymore. What I thought were just quirks at first had almost turned unbearable. He didn't like my style of clothes, the fact I didn't really like make-up, I did my hair to please him, he controlled our menu. Hell, he even decided which car we brought up here, even if he let me drive.

"But now you're not so sure?" Jake asked, but his tone was soft.

"I don't know," I said rising to my feet. "I can't think about this right now!" I was getting upset. In two days my whole world was turned upside down and I was questioning everything.

"Bells, I'm sorry," Jake said. "You don't need this added stress. I'm sorry." His voice was so contrite I had to look over at him. Carlisle's eyes panned between us. "I'll keep my mouth shut."

I nodded, showing him it was okay, and I appreciated his apology.

"Come, sit," Carlisle urged. "I might be able to shed some light on some of Edward's behavior."

"I'm going to go check on my dad," Jake said, looking a bit uncomfortable. He stood and walked to the door. He turned back and looked at me one last time and left.

"He's in love with you," Carlisle remarked, when Jake was gone and door closed with a soft click.

"I know," I replied. He looked as shocked as I felt by my candor.

"Do love him?" he asked.

"Yes. He was my best friend before I left for college. We lost touch," I answered. I was going to tell him just as a friend, but I knew that wasn't the truth. "But tell me about Edward." I was still in love with Jake. I never stopped loving him. But I was married to Edward. I had to hear what Carlisle had to say about him. He looked like he wanted more information, but sighed when I didn't provide any.

"Well, as I already told you, Edward's mother died when he was young. He started exhibiting signs of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder before she passed, but they intensified after. He became obsessed with my safety at work. When I wouldn't change my schedule to meet his irrational needs he became surly and withdrawn. He spent hours a day fixing the nick knacks and pictures on the walls, making sure they were straight. He complained that the maids were moving them just to irritate them. And from that he developed an extremely high moral code that no one could ever live up to. I got him into a great therapist, but Edward refused to use the cognitive behavioral therapy so we tried a few medications. We hadn't found the right medication and dosage before things came to a head and he moved out of my home and in with my brother-in-law." He paused.

I must have been sitting with my mouth hanging open like a fish. It explained so much. I had to research this topic for a story, so I couldn't understand why I hadn't noticed the symptoms.

"It's his OCD that prevents him from speaking with me. I don't meet his high standards, and I never will until he can get a handle on it. But you obviously do."

"His version of me does," I remarked. This was pulling so much together. If this was a disorder, then his behaviors are not totally his fault. My heart fractured again. I owed it to my husband to help him.

"I can see what he sees, but I can also see what he doesn't," he said. "And I haven't even known you for twenty-four hours." I bit my lip and pulled my shoulder up to my ear. "Oh, Bella, I think you're wonderful," he said in a rush and moved to the seat that Jake vacated. He placed his hand on mine in a fatherly gesture. "I just wanted you to know, because I can see my son is wearing you out. Your whole demeanor changes when you talk about him. When you talk to him."

"I've only been like that since he left yesterday to go back to Seattle. I'm angry with him," I replied. He was quiet for a few beats, his eyes searching my face. They stopped on my scar again.

"If you say so," he finally said. I could tell he didn't believe me. I didn't believe me, but he didn't push it. "You'll have to tell me the story of this charming scar someday."

He was changing the subject and I was glad. I'd been confused before he gave me that information, now I really didn't know what to think. I'd decided that'd I'd had enough with Edward's behavior, but now if there was something clinically wrong with him, was he really to blame? I'd have to do some more reading on how to deal with an OCD spouse. I'd come across those websites in my research, but didn't dive too deeply into them.

"Dr. Cullen?" a nurse poked her head into the waiting room.

"Yes, Darla?" he responded.

"They need your signature on some forms and you said you wanted to be with Mr. Swan when he woke. It's almost time," she said with a sweet but professional smile.

"Thank you, Darla," he said and turned back to me. "Want to follow me? I'm sure you're the first thing your father wants to see when he wakes. You should have heard him after the anesthesia kicked in but before he went under. He is very proud of you and happy you're here." He smiled again and I felt a blush bloom up my neck.

"Sure," was all I could think to say. I was so lost in my own thoughts. I followed Dr. Cullen down the hallway and we made a few turns. He looked back at me a few times, concern etched on his face. He stopped just outside the recovery room and turned to me.

"Bella, I hope I have not made things worse by sharing that with you," he said.

"No, I'm just so confused. I didn't know what I didn't know before Charlie had his heart attack, but now I am aware. Does that make any sense?" I asked.

"Yes, it does," he answered. I made a decision right there. Nothing could be solved until I saw Edward again, so I didn't need to worry about it until tomorrow. Right then I could take care of Charlie so that's what I needed to do. I told him as much. "Okay, then let's go in."

I followed him into the room with beeping and flashing machines all around us. Two nurses eyed Carlisle as we passed and he didn't pay them any notice. Actually, it was like he didn't notice at all. Edward reacted the same way, but he took a great deal of pleasure in his indifference. Carlisle was just indifferent. More confusion.

"Stop!" I said to myself and Dr. Cullen obeyed. He looked at me quizzically. "Sorry, not you. I was talking to myself. My mind won't shut up."

He smiled and nodded and led me to my father's bed. I gasped. The fat blue tube jutting from his mouth was nothing to the number of monitors surrounding him, all flashing and beeping a cacophony of noise. The rack of IV fluids were connected a number of other tubes attached to his arms and the port in his neck. My strong, silent father was so helpless laying there in that bed lined with metal rails. I felt Carlisle's arm wrap around me.

"It looks worse than it is," he promised. He pointed to a couple of machines. "All of these look very good and very promising. A nurse came over and smiled at Dr. Cullen, but it fell when she saw his arm around me. I didn't have the energy to get irritated with petty women.

"He's waking up, see?" Carlisle asked, pointing to one of the monitors. He noticed the nurse look over at me again and smiled at her. "Have you met Charlie's daughter and my daughter-in-law?" he asked her.

"Uh, no," she flustered, but she smiled. "You don't look old enough to have a daughter-in-law. I didn't even hide my eye roll.

"Can you please go get Mr. Black and his son from the waiting room? I think they should be in here, too.

"Yes, Doctor," she said and scooted out of the door.

"I'm sorry about that," he said.

"Is it always that bad?" I asked.

"You have no idea," he smiled back and walked closer to Charlie's head. I saw Charlie's hand twitch and his eyes open.

"Hey dad!" I said in an excited, but soothing voice. "You made it. And you didn't even need any of Jake's blood!" It sounded so stupid coming out of my mouth, I don't even know why I said it. Dr. Cullen was checking some other monitors.

"Okay, Charlie, let's get this thing out of your throat so you can say hi to Bella," he said. He fiddled with some things other things. "On the count of three I want you to cough as hard as you can. This is going to be unpleasant, but you'll feel much better once this is out." Charlie nodded. "One. Two. Three!"

Charlie coughed and a tube much longer than I could have imagined came out of his throat. Charlie coughed and spluttered a little more.

"Water?" he rasped out and I hurried to the bedside table where I could see a pitcher and a little cup. I poured it and held it in front of him.

"Try the straw, Bella," Dr. Cullen suggested. I looked back at the little table and found one sitting there.

"Oh, yeah," I said and watched gratefully as Charlie sipped at his water.

"Hey, Bells!" he said gratefully.

"Shhhh, don't talk," I urged.

"I'm just so darned happy so have my eyes open again," he added.

"Everything looks really good. The Blacks are on their way in and soon we'll get you moved back to your room. I'm very pleased with how everything went. But you're going to be groggy for the next few hours." Charlie nodded and the doors opened and Jake and Billy came in.

"Hey, Chief," Billy and Charlie said to each other. Jake came and stood by me, while Billy tried to banter with my dad.

"I am sorry, Bella, for pushing you in the waiting room. I won't push anymore. I just want to be Jake and Bells. Nothing more. Just Jake and Bells."

"Okay," I said, not a little relieved. I'd allowed myself to wander into some "what if" scenarios whether I admitted it or not. Most of my confusion stemmed from the disappointment I felt at not having an excuse to dump Edward in his controlling behavior.

I had to talk to Edward. I had to ask him about his OCD and his father. I had to give him a chance to explain. But I could have one night of Jake and Bells before I headed back into the storm.


Thoughts?