Geez, and I was supposed to ask him if he like Toriel romantically or not.
But got sidetracked.
I burdened him with my shit again. I thought after a while. Calmed enough that I stopped sobbing. I softly chuckled. "Sorry so much, Sans"
He silently continued comforting me with his hands on my back making me feel a lot better. "You just got my shit again. Huh?" I said referring to the time I broke down on the waterfall and he was there on my side while I cried for hours. I was honestly shocked that I didn't tell him anything and he just went and comforted me like how he's comforting me now.
Sans is kind of a softy really. I smiled remembering how he was so shocked that he didn't even get to say anything when I tackled him to the floor and cried hugging him. After that, I went on with my journey, obviously not wanting to explain myself and he just left me without a single word about it.
It was after my encounter with Undyne. She told me that I was the only one that stands before the dreams of all the monsters and I should just given my life for the cause.
I was supposed to be happy, right? Someone wants me and thinks of me as useful to them and honestly I was going to the king to die but then there and there I didn't think I want to die.
I didn't want to die. So I ran and ran and ran.
I saw Sans while running and I thought that maybe he'll help me but he didn't. He was sleeping. Like a log.
I was gonna die and he was just sleeping.. I cried running as fast as I could and when I was so tired I looked back and saw Undyne on the floor.
After giving her a glass of water and muttering to her that I didn't wanna die just yet, she left.
I went back to where I saw Sans but he wasn't there. I went back further until I was on the echo flowers and saw a misplaced bench and just sat down with millions of things going on in my head.
I was trying to keep it together but then I saw Sans standing right in front of me with his usual grin and I just burst into tears and tackled him.
Back then, I was so sure that it was the last time I'll see him. I can't believe I didn't just went and said I like him. I should've known, being on the face of death was really scary and that maybe unconsciously I never really want to end it.
After what felt like hours with me and Sans not speaking a word, I tried to ask Sans what I was supposed to ask in the first place.
"Sans, do you like mother?" I asked in all seriousness.
He must be so surprised on the roller coaster that is me. I mean I can't blame him.
First I asked him if he would have killed me and then I cried about my worth and then after I asked him if he like my mother.
He was surprised for sure and it was all over his face. It was hard not to smile since this is the first time I see Sans' face like that.
"Kid, are you alright?" he asked after a while. I burst up laughing.
Of course he'll asked if I'm alright.
"I'm fine. I'm fine. It's just that it was obvious to me, Sans" I called him out.
I am not sure if mother knew but I figured that most of our friends think so too.
"What's obvious?" Sans asked curiously. He can't fonder what he was so obvious about.
Of course he can't. People who are observant do not exactly observed themselves. I thought.
"You've been going here lately. Even though I have told you many times that Toriel is with Asgore but you always wait for her here." I stated the facts.
I would have added that I feel like he waits here because he didn't want to see Toriel and Asgore together but I feel like that's just me being mean to him.
"And when she's here, you were so preoccupied with the games I have or maybe you were just shy and haven't taken any initiative yet." I mean Sans have been visiting a lot that he sure did managed to catch Toriel but he didn't really tried to converse with her except with his jokes.
Sans was getting flustered and I saw his face having a shade of blue. Is he embarrassed or is he going to vomit?
"I admit it was cute at first but Sans, you have been doing it for weeks. It's not a good look" I reprimanded him.
Well it isn't. If I was an outsider, I would think that Sans was not visiting Toriel and was visiting someone else. But there is nobody else in this house.
"You got to admit what you're doing is unproductive Sans. You visit her but then you just joke with her and that's it." I said softly. This is it. I should give him the courage to confess.
It's not that I don't like Sans visiting but I just feel like he's wasting his time waiting here when he could've just went with Toriel. I know I said that Toriel still loves Asgore but I also haven't asked mother that.
For all I know, she was starting to like Sans. And what's not to like about Sans?
I sat down to the couch, I didn't even realized I got up in the middle of my speech. Now it feels like I was berating a kid for not telling what he likes.
I heavily sighed. I didn't want to nag but it was seriously getting on my nerves. After all, if he didn't like mother like that why does he always visit?
"Sans, I love you but I can't see you like that anymore. It hurts" I heard a sharp intake.
I know I basically confessed but I'm sure he thinks I meant as a friend. Privileged of friend zoned I guess.
I can confess without really confessing.
"You.." Sans stopped. He was kinda shocked again by my outburst. Figures.
I looked at him and he was still blue that I was considering giving him a bucket if ever he needed to vomit.
I mean I know I jump from topic to topic but I never made someone puke because of it.
Is he really just blushing?
I stared at him, giving him the courage to continue and also silently telling him that I was done talking. He became bluer than before.
Is he getting sick? I thought mentally thinking where mother put the medicines and the bucket.
"You.. Love me?" he asked. I blinked.
And blinked.
And smiled. Hiding my embarrassment. "Of course, you idiot." I said happily.
Whichever way he took it wasn't a lie. I love him as a friend and more than a friend. Whoever he likes wouldn't make me less of a friend to him.
Also why would he think I love him more than a friend? I mean I guess I was obvious enough.. But then that means..
That means.
.
.
...
Oh my God!
I basically confessed to Sans and he knew I was talking about romantic love and he just confirmed it again which I then confirmed.
Oh my God,.. Oh my God..
My mind went blank and my face went red. I can't believe I did this to myself.
"I- ah I" I stuttered. What was I thinking? I just jokingly confessed to the most observant person I know. Of course, he'll see through it.
I was panicking and I saw that Sans was panicking as well.
Poor guy, I can't believe someone can be that blue.
What was I thinking?
