A/N: So sorry about the long delay, my keyboard on my old laptop got messed up and trying to type anything out on it was a nightmare. But now I'm back in business and will try to post at least once a week if I can manage it. Hope you enjoy the chapter, thought it was time for a little lighthearted fun.
Chapter 19: An Unexpected Ally
Luna was walking down the hallway on the seventh floor, heading towards the room of requirement when Peeves the Poltergeist zoomed towards her laughing. "Oh, that was excellent. Nicked a dungbomb off of a fourth year Gryffindor and used it to terrorize a group of first year Hufflepuffs. Little monsters didn't know what hit them." he said, doing a backflip in the air before hovering in front of her. "What are you up to today? Anything fun I can join in on?" he asked hopefully, clearly eager for more opportunities to prank unsuspecting students where he could.
Normally Luna tried to be friendly to everyone, including Peeves when they crossed paths but at the moment she was getting a little annoyed. "Look, it's not that I don't appreciate a good prank, Peeves but I'm kind of in the middle of something at the moment. Harry's noticed Malfoy disappearing in here for long periods of time and we're trying to figure out what he's up to. So, unless you happen to know what Malfoy's doing I'd appreciate it if you leave me to it." she requested, crossing her arms as she waited for Peeves to do as asked. There was no guarantee he would, but waiting was probably better than whatever else he might do to her if she attempted to go around or through him by force.
"My, my...a bit more touch today than usual. However, it just so happens I do know what the little prince of Slytherin is up to in there. I've overheard him muttering to himself about it more than once. The project he's working on is driving him quite bonkers, you see." Peeves told her with a chuckle. He could see that he'd caught her attention with that comment and smirked. "I might even be willing to share said information with you. But only if you help me with a prank first." he said. He had a fantastic idea in mind he just hadn't figured out how to pull it off yet.
Luna couldn't help but let out a high-pitched giggle at how ridiculous the situation was. Ever since Harry had noticed Malfoy disappearing in the room of requirement they'd been knocking their heads against the wall trying to figure out what he was doing. Also if what he was doing would be dangerous to the school, because they both still suspected him of being behind the cursed necklace that had hurt Katie Bell. All along Peeves, the poltergeist almost everybody tended to overlook had been sitting there with the answer. "Okay Peeves, you've got yourself a deal. I help you with this one prank, and in exchange you tell me what Malfoy's up to. Those terms sound fair?" she asked, wanting to get his agreement. He liked to get one over on people, but she was fairly sure that if he agreed to a deal he would hold up his end of the bargain.
Peeves smiled widely and gave her a nod. "Seems fair to me, Miss Loony." he told her. Most of the time when people called her that it was used as an insult, but Peeves was actually trying to be respectful. It was simply what he'd always called her. Luna seemed to take that into account and simply nodded in reply. 'Okay, now the tricky part is going to be pulling this off. You see, I want to mix Professor Snape's shampoo with this color-changing hair dye. According to the bottle it's supposed to change colors every few minutes, even doing multiple colors at once from time to time. Only problem is he keeps the bottles magically sealed and I don't have access to a wand. I need help getting them open so I can mix in the dye. Think you're up to it?" he asked.
She just gave him a knowing grin before shooting him a wink. "Oh, I think I can manage. Do you know what time he usually takes his shower? If I remember right those dyes usually take about an hour before they kick in, so we want to make sure he's in a nice public place when it starts taking effect." Luna said. It would be a real shame if nobody were to witness the intimidating Professor Snape with a variety of different hair colors. She'd tell Harry to mention something to Colin Creevey so he could get his camera ready for the occasion.
"Nothing to worry about there. From what I've seen he takes his shower at the same time every morning, puts the finishing touches on his lessons, and then goes down to the Great Hall for breakfast. If we tamper with the shampoo the night before it should hit him right in the middle of breakfast the following morning." Peeves told her, cracking his knuckles with a disconcerting series of pops. Reaching into his pocket, he produced the hair dye. "If you're sure that you're up to it, I leave the rest to you." he said, saluting her and getting a nod from her in return before zooming off to make mischief somewhere else.
Luna read the instructions on the dye before grinning and pocketing it for later. Turning away from the seventh floor she decided to head towards the Gryffindor tower to find Harry instead. A third year was heading out and was nice enough to hold the portrait open so she could enter. Sure enough Harry was sitting in the armchair nearest the fire and working on an essay. As she got closer she was able to make out that it was for Transfiguration. She waited patiently for him to finish his paragraph before grabbing him by his messy hair and kissing the top of his head. "So, I have a lead on the Malfoy situation. And the best part is all we have to do to get is prank Professor Snape." she said in a low voice. It sounded ridiculous, but sometimes life liked to be silly, and she couldn't really blame it all things considered.
Harry stopped what he was doing and leaned back so he could see her, even if it was by looking at her upside down. "You're serious? We prank Snape and somebody tells us what Malfoy's doing? Who on earth would have that be the requirement for spilling the beans?" he asked her. He couldn't really think of anybody who would have that sort of requirement off the top of his head, and he was admittedly rather curious as to who it was. Usually he would guess the Weasley twins, but they weren't at Hogwarts any longer so he was kind of at a loss.
It was kind of fun having a secret Harry didn't know about, but she wasn't going to torture him by making him wait longer to find out who it was "Believe it or not, Peeves the Poltergeist. Apparently he's been trying to get Snape but because he's paranoid and magically seals his shampoo he hasn't been able to tamper with it. I've been asked to slip some dye in there, and if all goes well he should have his hair changing color during breakfast the next day." Luna explained with a wide smile. "Now all I need is a distraction...and Snape doesn't hate anybody as much as you. Care to run interference for me?" she asked him.
That question was rather insulting, and Harry held a hand to his chest. "You wound me Luna. Anything involving pranking Snape is an automatic yes. I thought you would have known that by now." he told her, feigning hurt. It all broke down though when she leaned over him and pressed her lips against his in an upside down kiss before pulling away with a smirk. "Yeah, I'm good now. What time do you want me to cause a distraction?" he asked. Timing was everything when it came to this sort of thing, and Snape was more suspicious than most. Probably because most of the students outside of Slytherin loathed him.
Luna smiled when his facade crumbled easily with a little kiss. Some people thought getting boys to do what you wanted was difficult, but really you just had to use the right tactics. "Well, I was kind of thinking we could do it after dinner. Maybe we could shoot for half seven?" she asked him. By then it should give people enough time to get back to their common rooms after dinner so people would be less likely to spot them. The best pranks were always done in a way that nobody suspected the real perpetrators. He was sure Ron and Hermione would be suspicious, but aside from them and Snape's perpetual blaming him for everything anyway nobody should have any idea.
Harry gave her a nod, already having something in mind. You see, since he had helped the Twins get their business of the ground that had provided him with some complimentary pranking items. One of which had been used by them last year to great effect, their portable swamp. He figured all he had to do was shout some insults at Snape, lure him away from his room, and throw it behind him. It was particularly nasty to try and get rid of and he would either have to try and muddle through it or go around. Either way, it should give Luna plenty of time to tamper with Snape's shampoo. "Half seven it is. I'll lend you my cloak just to be safe. When you see the swamp appear in the hallway, that's your cue to enter." he told her with a wink. He popped up to his dorm and handed her the cloak that was folded neatly and for all appearances just looked like a blanket to anybody not in the know.
One thing that always surprised her was how generous Harry was with his things, and when he handed her his cloak Luna smiled at him. "Thanks, I'll take good care of it." she promised, before pulling him in for a heated kiss. "Once we pull this off, we should be in with my informant. I'll let you know what he says about Malfoy." she assured him. They'd had no idea what to do for a while now so finally getting a breakthrough felt amazing. If he was up to something nefarious they might even be able to catch him and finally put a stop to whatever it was he was trying to accomplish.
With that the two of them parted ways and went to their classes. They saw each other briefly at lunch and then at dinner they met for a short period of time just to reiterate their plans. Both agreed that they thought they had a solid one and got into positions. Luna took the time to slip under the invisibility cloak and hide behind a suit of armor near Professor Snape's living quarters while Harry took the more direct approach of the two. Walking up bold as brass she watched as Harry banged on the door and shouted for all to hear. "I heard the reason Neville's boggart turned into Professor Snape dressed in his aunt's clothes is because he crossdresses in real life as well." More than a few people were within earshot, the Slytherins scowling while the smattering from the other houses burst out in laughter.
One of the second years even let out a cheer as Snape burst out with an ominous swooshing of his cape. "Potter, six weeks detention and thirty points from Gryffindor for disrespecting a teacher." he said, scowling at the onlookers until they began to walk away. "Well, go on boy. Your detention isn't starting now it will be on saturday scrubbing out cauldrons the hard way." he said, crossing his arms and glaring at the Boy-Who-Lived in an attempt to get him to leave. Clearly, Harry wasn't having it though and Luna could see that he was preparing for another round of insults.
"Oh, so you don't deny my allegations? You hear that, world? It turns out my joke actually turned out to be correct. So what? Do you steal Professor Sprout's and McGonagall's robes when they're not looking? I mean really, it's one thing to do it with what you buy yourself but stooping to stealing from others as well. You really should be ashamed, Professor." Harry said, drawling out the title into a clear insult as he began to back his way down the hallway. It seemed to be working too, Professor Snape was following exactly as they'd hoped he would. If there was one thing Harry could do better than anybody else it was get under that man's skin.
Snape took the bait and was following him down the hall, completely unaware that there was something more going on behind him. "Careful now, Potter. I'm sure even Dumbledore will agree you've gone too far this time. In fact, I think it's time we ask him. Follow me, Mr. Potter." he said, sneering at him before turning and trying to make his way back down the hallway. As soon as Snape turned away Harry took that moment to throw the portable swamp and as soon as it hit the floor it took effect. Where before there had been a regular hallway there was now a nice swamp impeding Snape's path, causing him to whirl back around on Harry. "What's the meaning of this? Get rid of it immediately!" he bellowed, eyes shooting daggers at Harry.
With the attention well and truly fixed on Harry Luna took the moment to slip inside his chambers quietly. She made her way to the shower and found the sealed shampoo bottle just like Peeves had said. Pulling out her wand, she glanced around before murmuring a quiet finite incantatem. She took the dye and poured some into both his shampoo and conditioner before mixing it around and replacing the caps. She cast a sealing charm on them both before quietly slipping out of his chambers once again. Everything was going according to plan and Harry and Snape were still arguing as she made her way out safely. Once she was at the end of the corridor she stuck her hand out of the cloak and flashed Harry a thumbs up before disappearing around the corner. Now all they had to do was wait and see what would happen tomorrow at breakfast.
Harry wound up with a total of three months detention in addition to having to write a letter of apology to Snape for his blatant disrespect of him. It wasn't ideal, but all in all he thought they would get the better end of that deal with his impending public humiliation fast approaching. The best part was there was no way Snape could blame it on him since they were together the whole time. Sure he might suspect that they had set him up but he would have absolutely no proof to back that allegation up.
Both Harry and Luna were rather excited to see what happened with their plan and worked hard to get caught up on all of their classwork. Once that was done they called it an early night and headed to bed. The following morning they met in front of the Great Hall and stepped off to the side so they could talk. "I talked to Colin, he said he'll make sure to have his camera at the ready. When he asked what for I just told him to watch the teachers, so hopefully he'll be able to document this epic moment to perfection." Harry told her with a grin.
Luna couldn't help but laugh a little at Harry's enthusiasm. "That's great, I'm sure he'll do a fine job. I talked to the person with the information and if all goes as planned he said he'll be more than happy to spill the beans on what Malfoy's doing." she assured him. Reaching over, Luna grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him into a rough kiss. Before she came up for air she bit his lip hard and by the time she came up for air was a little dizzy from the intensity of it. "We need to make some more time for snogging." she told him seriously. With a smile, she smoothed out the creases in his robes and grabbed his hand as she started walking towards the Great Hall. "Let's grab some breakfast." she said eagerly.
While caught off guard by the kiss at first Harry was more than happy to return it, letting out a low moan when she bit down on his lip. Her suggestion was one he couldn't agree with more and he nodded as he tried to catch his breath. "Definitely sounds like a good idea to me." he agreed. It wasn't just the fact they would be snogging either, they needed some time alone together to just enjoy it. Walking into the hall with her, he reached over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Enjoy the show." he said, before splitting off to head to the Gryffindor table as she headed to the Ravenclaw one. He found a spot next to Hermione and loaded up his plate, digging in with a healthy appetite.
It wasn't long before Professor Snape arrived and at first everything appeared normal. His hair looked like its usual greasy black self and nothing seemed to be amiss. Five minutes later though, both Luna and Harry noticed as the edges of his hair started to turn pink. Around the middle of it there was a light purple hue and before long most of the students were snickering and discussing it among themselves as they picked up on it as well. Snape seemed to notice but didn't think anything of it until Professor Sprout leaned over and said something to him. Alarmed and sure she was wrong, he grabbed a silver goblet and held it up to himself, his expression going blank as he noticed she was in fact correct in that she'd said his hair was pink and purple. As it started to change over to a sickly green he went over to speak to Professor Dumbledore. "I don't know how he did this, but it has to be Potter's doing. To get back at me for all of the detentions I assigned and the points I took yesterday. Are you going to do something?" he asked.
Professor Dumbledore merely steepled his fingers together and looked at Professor Snape intently. "Severus, you have absolutely no proof that Harry did anything. In fact, he spent a good portion of last night with you and then talking to me in my office once we got the swamp taken care of. Innocent until proven guilty, Severus." he said, staring him down. "Now, I recommend you either finish your meal and try to enjoy the humor of the situation or leave before you spoil it for everyone else. Be a good sport old chap, we all get pranked occasionally." he told him, his eyes twinkling as he gave him a smile.
It was obvious that Snape was seriously disappointed by Dumbledore's words and shot Harry a glare before going back to his seat. Taking the plate of food and a drink, he left the Great Hall without another word as his hair began to turn into the colors of the rainbow. Colin had gotten several pictures throughout the experience and snapped another as the students applauded. They might not know who had managed to prank the obnoxious Professor Snape but it was clear that they appreciated the handiwork. The rest of the meal went by with most of the students in excellent cheer aside from the Slytherin table. Apparently many of them took affront to their head of house being treated in such a way and were not pleased.
Once breakfast was over Luna returned to the seventh floor after shooting Harry a wave and found Peeves waiting by the entrance to the Room of Requirement. He laughed and swooped over to where she was standing. "I must say I'm rather impressed Miss Loony, if you can pull off something like this we might have to work together more in future. I'll do as promised and tell you what the Malfoy brat is up to." he said, moving closer. "He's attempting to fix something called a vanishing cabinet and is having a rough time with it. They used to be quite popular from what I remember as a means of rapid teleportation. If he's trying to fix one than that means there's probably another somewhere that it's connected to." Peeves explained with a knowing grin. "That's all I know, what you do with that information is up to you." he said, before zooming off down the hall without another word.
Luna watched him go as she digested the information, trying to think of why Malfoy would go to the trouble of fixing an old vanishing cabinet. All she knew about them was they tended to break and were rather difficult to fix. She knew that they could create passageways but Hogwarts usually tended to block out any form of teleportation to or from unless Dumbledore was allowing it. The only reason she could think of to fix it was to either take it out of Hogwarts or sell it. Unless...unless it had some weird way of circumventing the wards that Hogwarts operated within. "A lot of questions but no good answers, looks like I have a lot of research ahead of me." she said with a determined look in her eyes.
After taking the time to fill Harry in on what she learned she headed straight to the library and got to work. Before long she had a pile of books in front of her and quickly began to realize why Malfoy was so frustrated with trying to fix the broken cabinet. None of the books seemed to agree on exactly how the cabinets functioned, which meant trying to fix anything would be a lot of guesswork in trying to understand how exactly things worked. After about two hours she put them away and decided to call it a day for now, and headed back to Ravenclaw tower. She was in the mood for a nice long nap and she wasn't going to let anything interfere with that desire.
