Hey guys! :) I am so sorry again, it took such a long time. I think I had to figure out how to go on first in detail, but I know now. Thanks again for your comments, they mean so much to me. And I thank all the others for reading my stuff! :) I promise it won't take such a long time anymore.


It was raining outside. Not just a drizzle, but a steady stream of water. In less than a minute Peter was soaking wet and started to freeze while running after the boy.

What the hell is he doing? he asked himself and concentrated on the small shape in front of him. He could barely see Neal through the pouring rain and man, this kid was fast. A lot of practice, Peter assumed.

"Neal, stop running!", he shouted out more than once. The kid didn't react and continued running as if the devil was after him. Well, maybe that's the case, from his point of view! he chuckled dryly.

"Come on, buddy. Stop it now!", he tried once more, but again the kid didn't even seem to notice.

Peter wheezed now and could hardly keep up. He turned a corner and suddenly Neal was nowhere to be seen. Fucking hell, this couldn't be true. Peter looked around frantically but couldn't find him. Thoughts were swirling through his head. So, the boy finally took his chance! But why now? What did they do to scare him like that?

"Neal!", he shouted as loudly as he could, still panting. "Come out, buddy. It's all right, we'll sort it out." The street lay empty in front of him, there wasn't a single movement.

"Shit, Neal. This isn't funny. It's not a game. You can't just run whenever it gets difficult. Please, don't do that to me. Please!", he begged. To his left, a woman peeked curiously out of her window. Peter took out his badge and showed it in her direction. He didn't want her to call the police, not yet. As soon as she saw it, her face disappeared.

Peter closed his eyes and sighed. He slowly followed the street and looked around, when his mobile began ringing. Peter rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Special Agent Burke, who's speaking?", he answered it brusquely.

"Good evening Agent Burke. I'm in charge of the offender's monitoring tonight and I have to inform you, that Mr. Neal Caffrey just left his radius.", a young voice answered. Peter's eyes widened. The tracking anklet, of course! He didn't even think about it. He had set a very small radius for the night and evening hours.

"Um, yes. Can you tell me where he is right now? It… may be a mistake.", he replied hesitantly.

"May be?", the man asked questioningly.

"Just tell me where he is!", Peter bellowed.

"All right, Sir ... of course I can tell you. He's not moving right now. I suppose he's in some kind of a backyard. Westwood Lane 451b. May I call backup?"

That was close by, so he didn't run anymore. "No! Um, I mean I can manage that myself. I…", Peter started, but was interrupted by the young Agent.

"Wait, he's moving now. He's walking towards…", he started, but now it was Peter's turn to interrupt him. He could see Neal's narrow shape heading slowly in his direction.

"It's all right. He's with me now. It was just a misunderstanding. No need to inform someone, do you understand?", he said sharply. "Well, that's ok, I suppose. Have a nice evening!", the Agent replied confused, and Peter cut the call without another word.

Neal stopped two meters in front of him, his head down, concentrating on the ground. Raindrops were falling from his brown curls and he was shivering. Peter stared at him, in a mixture of anger and worry. Neal didn't move, he just waited for something to happen.

Peter slowly approached him. "Are you all right?", Peter asked quietly. Neal nodded, refused to look at him. Peter took off his jacket and put it carefully around Neal's shoulders, as not to scare him.

"Let's go home, buddy.", Peter sighed. The kid nodded again and they both began walking side by side.

"I'm so sorry.", Neal mumbled, barely notable.

"I know, Neal, I know. But that simply isn't enough sometimes. We've got to talk. I think we both need a hot shower and dry clothes first, but after that we'll have a chat. It's not working like that.", he stated and then paused for a moment. "But… I'm glad you came back after all."

Neal looked very ashamed and pointed on the red light of his tracking ankle. "What about that thing?"

"I took care of it. Don't worry. But please, Caffrey, please don't do it again. Someday I won't be able to help you anymore."

Neal didn't answer. Of course he wouldn't promise, not if he was honest.


When they reached home, El was standing in the doorframe.

"Oh, thank god!", she shouted out.

They both entered the warm and cosy hallway, producing little water puddles on the floor. Neal looked miserably. He still didn't dare to look up.

"I'm a horrible person, Elizabeth. I'm so sorry, I really am. You didn't deserve this… me.", he brought out softly.

El's eyes were full of pity and gentleness. "No, Neal. You're not a horrible person. Please don't ever say or even think that again. You just went through a lot and cannot cope with it right now. But that doesn't make you a bad person. It would help if you could express your feelings from time to time though, instead of running, honey.", she said kindly.

She reached out to gently touch his cheek and surprisingly Neal didn't wince but accepted her touch. He closed his eyes for a second.

"Oh my, Neal, you're ice cold! That's what you need in your condition… You two go upstairs, while I'll prepare some tea and cookies."


Neal was staring at his pale reflection in the bathroom's mirror.

What was wrong with him? He actually WAS a bad person, he felt sure about that. He couldn't cope with all the kindness in this house, especially not with the planned betrayal in his mind. He didn't deserve this, at all and didn't know how to behave. If it wasn't for Mozzie, he would have run for good. But he couldn't.

In his former life, he had to be tough and unapproachable. What happened to his confident self? He sighed heavily, feeling his throat aching badly and turned to enter the shower. He enjoyed the hot water pattering on his body, bringing his senses back to life. His aching body started losing its tension and he somehow knew what he had to do now.

The little break in heaven was over. He had to finish his job as soon as possible. After that, he would hopefully disappear and the Burke's could go on with their perfect little life, without a teenage troublemaker around them.

Why did the thought of leaving and never coming back hurt so much? Neal always thought about himself as a lonely warrior, the only thing he has had in mind for years was leaving his father and living on his own, maybe with Mozzie as a companion. So, he shouldn't care at all about the Burke's. But… he had to admit that he did.

Fucking hell. Neal frantically shook his head. Concentrate Neal, focus on what really matters. Mozzie had been part of his life for years and he took care of Neal, he could always count on him. He had no choice at all, and he knew that. After all he felt pretty sure that he could never fully trust anyone else anyway and what would his life be with the Burke's? They surely wouldn't keep him for long, especially if he wouldn't cope.

And then? Juvie, a foster family, a group home? No, thanks. He went through hell with his father, but his experiences with his latest foster family weren't any better. The Burke's wouldn't change anything on the long run. Even in his misery, he could feel his strength coming back. It was all that he needed, a reminder of what mattered most in his life, always did. But he certainly had to give Peter a little something, to get what he wanted, no, what he needed. And he doubted that he would be able to lie, not in this case.

He felt a lot better after the shower and slipped in the fresh clothes Peter gave him.

Oh great, another giant grey FBI-Hoody! he snorted in disgust. Smart as Peter was, he had a terrible fashion taste. But he could smell a faint reminder of Peter's aftershave, which made him feel somehow safe and secure in this grey tent and he allowed himself to enjoy the nice feeling for just a moment and closed his eyes.

Neal leaned on the bathroom wall and felt unable to move. He wished he could just disappear into his room, to sleep for hours, but he knew that wouldn't be possible. He finally took a deep breath and headed down again to face the man he had to con as best as he could now.


Peter was sitting on the sofa next to El, both were waiting for Neal to join them.

"Did he say what made him run?", his wife asked quietly.

"No. He didn't talk much. But now he has to. This obviously isn't working, we don't even now how to treat him if he doesn't manage to express his feelings. So I'll make him talk now. I have to, it's the best I can do for all of us.", Peter stated firmly.

El sighed. "I see your point, Peter. But he's a traumatized kid, you have to be gentle and careful. Otherwise we don't know where this will lead us, you're maybe opening pandora's box. And we're not experts. He needs love and sympathy, but also professional help. You saw his tortured body and his behaviour, this isn't something that he's able to control right now. Not even when you're trying to force him." Before Peter had the chance to answer, they both turned around after a cracking noise and saw Neal standing in the doorframe, staring at them.

He looked hilarious and childlike in Peter's gigantic hoodie and Peter felt the sudden urge to laugh at the sight of him but could stop himself in time.

"Come on in, buddy!", he encouraged the boy who reluctantly obeyed and headed towards the armchair opposite the sofa. There was an awkward silence for a few moments.

Then Neal cleared his throat and met their gazes. "I… appreciate your very well intentions, Elizabeth. But Peter is right. I can't behave like I did. He has every right to demand cooperation and I'll try my best. I'll start talking and help as best as I can, even though I don't think that my personal past is of any importance. I don't need any help with these topics. What happened in the past can't be changed and I already told Peter that I'm not willing to talk about that. Please, don't worry. After I did what I can, I won't bother you two anymore."

During his little speech, El started to nervously tap with her hands on her knees and shook her head afterwards. "No, Neal. You're right, you can't change your past and we are not able to do that either. But you can learn to cope. And running and masking your feelings won't help long-term. And stop talking as if you were a burden to us. We both like you and want to help you and that won't be possible if you're not willing to open up. This is a very important time in your life, please seize the opportunity."

Neal lowered his gaze again and stared at his hands. "I can't, Elizabeth. As you said, you would open pandora's box and I tell you that's nothing you would like to experience. Just… leave me alone with this. I… I beg you. It's best for all of us."

Peter could see the helplessness in El's face. She had tears in her eyes. "All right… I won't force you, I never could. But… would you do me one favour?", she asked in a husky voice.

Neal looked up and nodded hesitantly after a few seconds.

"What made you run after I came in with the cake?", she asked quietly, after clearing her throat.

Neal paused and looked her in the eyes. He weighed his possibilities and then decided that she deserved this little bit of truth. "My mum… she… she left me for a while and…. came back for my birthday, with a similar cake. I was so happy to have her back and I had one last happy day for a very long time. But then… something happened, and she left again. The rest of the cake landed on the floor. And my mum… she passed away a few days later. I never had a cake after that… for my birthday I mean. I'm sorry Elizabeth, I freaked out. It felt like a shadow of that day somehow.", he replied reluctantly, but with a steady voice.

He left El speechless, a single tear was rolling down her cheek and she hurried to wipe it off with the back of her hand. She stood up and knelt down in front of the boy, who backed away a bit. She moved slowly and gently took his hand in hers. Neal managed to let it happen, even though Peter could see him lightly stiffening again.

"Please look at me, Neal.", she said softly. The boy hesitated for a moment, but then looked her in the eyes. "I'm so sorry. For everything you had to go through. You deserve better, you really do. And I want you to recognize that all of that wasn't your fault. The way you behave is the consequence of the way other people treated you in the past. I accept that you deny talking about it right now and appreciate what you were able to reveal what you did. But I really hope that you'll feel save enough one day to finally trust us and then we'll be with you to listen. Until then, please be gentle with yourself. Don't blame you for things you couldn't control or change!".

Now Neal's eyes were filled with tears and he was slightly trembling. He shook his head and released his hands out of her grip. He stayed calm and tensed. El stood up, now shaking herself. "I'll leave you two alone now to prepare some tea and cookies to raise the mood a little bit. But please, honey, think about my words. We're both here to help you." Neal still remained silent but looked up now and offered her a weak smile, full of masked desperation.


After she had left, Peter stared at the boy in his far to big hoodie. He smiled encouragingly.

"We'll sort this out, kid. I promise. But I'm glad you decided to finally talk to me."

Neal meat his eyes with a serious expression. "I'll confess Peter, I'll be as honest with you as possible."

Peter nodded and smiled at him. "That's nice to hear, but it can wait until tomorrow. And first of all we should go shopping, don't you think?"

Neal looked at him in confusion.

"Well, if you prefer to wear my fashionable clothes, that's fine.", Peter said chuckling.

"Um, nothing against your taste, but I'm not really a big fan of FBI hoodies which label me as your property.", Neal replied cheekily. "But, um, Peter. I don't have any money with me."

Peter chuckled again. "I'm absolutely sure you could work something out." Neal shrugged, looking uncomfortable. "Don't worry, kid, that's not a problem!"

Neal managed a small grin and again Peter could see the tension decrease a little bit.

"After that we'll have a talk, is that all right?", Peter seriously added.

"In your office?", Neal asked, a little hastily.

"Let's see if you feel all right tomorrow. I'd prefer to do it properly in a room with some devices to record your statement and a few witnesses. But if you're not feeling well enough, we could begin with it here. Don't worry!", Peter said gently and noticed the relieved expression on the kids face.

When his wife came back with the tray full of her delicious home-made cookies and steaming pods of tea, Peter and Neal were laughing after a stupid joke Peter told and she could see that everything went well. They spent the next couple of hours debating over the tv program. While Peter insisted to watch a football match, Neal preferred an animal documentation. In the end they decided to equally split the time, but the kid couldn't stop himself from moaning, until Peter finally gave in and they ended up watching the whole documentation. Even Peter had to admit, that he enjoyed it.

From time to time his gaze went on the boy. He couldn't believe how soon he felt such an amount of affection for the boy. How could that happen? He was never really interested in children, that had always been El's part. But somehow this boy found a way in his heart and he didn't know how to deal with it, especially as he had to treat him like a normal suspect in the office. While watching Neal, Peter felt relieved to see him laughing and joking around. But he also noticed a hint of sadness and guiltiness whenever he looked in Peter's direction. Would he ever get to know what was going on in the boy's mind?


Even though Neal enjoyed the time with the Burke's he felt exhausted when he could finally enter his bedroom. He still felt sick and the whole happy-family-situation down there didn't help much. How could anyone even with a touch of conscience con such nice people?

His head felt like a hot balloon now, but he didn't allow himself to rest, because he knew he would immediately fall asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow. So he sat down in front of the small desk and took out some paper and a pencil and started drawing while listening to the fading noises outside his room.

At first, Satchmo appeared on his paper, followed by Elizabeth and Peter, sitting together on the sofa, both laughing. He felt a rush of mixed feelings. Would it be like that if he had a real family? A loving and caring family? He stared at the faces, full of affection and suddenly decided something. He turned the paper around and began to write. After that he folded it up and put it carefully between the bed's frame and the mattress. Then he just sat there, and it took a while before he noticed he was crying silently. Stupid me! He thought and frantically wiped away his tears.

You're not supposed to have a family, you don't need anybody but Mozzie!


After another hour without a noise, Neal sneaked out of his room and silently went downstairs. Es expected, he found El's phone where it had been the night before. He hurried to dial the number and waited impatiently.

"Alfredo's Pizza, how can I help you?", the well-known voice answered.

Neal frowned. "What happened to the Red Dragon?", he couldn't help but ask.

"Too many competitors and … a little problem with the health department. Even though the rats weren't THAT bad, you know.", the voice answered matter-of-factly.

"Um… all right… Whatever. So, Is it still possible to order 42b without peppers and garlic?"

"It surely is. But I have to inform you, that 42b doesn't contain any garlic and peppers lately.", the voice replied drily.

Neal shook his head, a little annoyed now. "Could you just execute my order… please?"

"No need to overreact, sir. I'll see what I can do for you.", the voice answered obviously bored and cut the call without another word.

Neal took a deep breath. This time it took Keller less then five minutes to call him back.

"Are you finally ready to fulfil your duty, kid?", he bellowed.

"I told you, at first I want to talk to Mozzie.", Neal answered in a steady voice.

"You've got two minutes.", the badass simply answered. Neal waited anxiously.

"Neal, mon frère?", a familiar voice asked huskily.

"Thank god, Mozzie… I'm so sorry. How are you? Did they hurt you anymore?", Neal felt utterly relieved, at least his friend was still alive.

"I'm alright. The food could be better and … just a bit more. But don't worry, I'm tough. No need to be sorry, I always knew you would never let me down.", he sounded very weak. "

I'll get you out of this hell as soon as possble, I promise, Mozzie. Just hold on, I…", before he could continue, Keller interrupted him.

"That's enough, kid. I did what you wanted. So what about part of the deal?", he said sharply.

Neal felt bare hatred flooding his whole body. He took a deep breath to calm himself down. "I'll be in the headquarter tomorrow around noon. You'll get your stupid painting. And you better leave Mozzie alone, otherwise I promise, someday you'll regret it badly.", he said coldly.

Keller laughed out loud. "All right, I'm extremely frightened now.", he said mockingly. "My contact is ready. Do what I want and you and you're friend can ride together in the sunset." He cut the call and left Neal exhausted and deep in desperate thoughts.