Very sorry for the long delay. I just got over the worst writing slump. The idea for Megamind's geekily long information packet comes from joanhello.
Zombies shuffled into the Lair in a trickle, a river, a flood. Dead, sad eyes stared at him accusingly, faces of people he knew, his uncles, Gabby, Luke, Bernard, Doris and her grandkids... the warden who, bizarrely, lifted his hand in salute...
Disembodied wails echoed off the walls and into his ears. His own panicked, high-pitched whimpering wasn't enough to drown them out.
Megamind scrabbled at a wall that had turned into mud, trying to climb, trying to pull up Minion and Roxanne after him, but it was impossible, every time he got one of them pulled up the other would start to slide back, back into the muck and the clawing hands of the zombies.
His arm sank into the wall up to the elbow. Something grabbed him and he opened his mouth to scream but terror choked him. The zombies were under the mud, they were everywhere, there was no escape. He struggled, but his feet couldn't find anything solid to dig in to, and as the thing began to drag him under...
He woke up. His heart pounded in his throat and every muscle was constricted with terror. The dream had felt so real he could almost taste the mud.
Roxanne slept beside him, safe, perfectly safe, her breathing deep and even. No doubt Minion slept peacefully in his tank.
Slowly, slowly, he relaxed. His breath stopped racing in and out and his heart stopped thundering in his chest, leaving him to wonder why his left arm hurt so abominably. Looking down he saw that Roxanne had shifted, and was putting a painful amount of weight on his elbow.
He gently extracted it from under Roxanne's head, letting her slip onto the pillow. She muttered in her sleep, then rolled onto her other side. He rolled over too, and massaged his arm to get some life back into it.
More fences needed to be built, around the water plant, the sewage treatment plant, and the fire station. That was a start. More safe zones, with entire neighborhoods walled in, and patrols of humans and brainbots to ensure they were zombie-free.
Was this their future? For everyone to live behind walls, unable to go anywhere unless they were armed? Regular call-outs to bring out the dead before they got up and walked out on their own?
The thought depressed him. He'd spent his entire life escaping prison, and now the whole city was going to be full of prisons. And he would be the warden.
His arm was better so he rolled over and, after some hesitation, edged closer to Roxanne so he could drape his right arm over her, and folded his other, still tingling arm against his chest. He wanted to kiss her neck, but didn't think her injunction to kiss her extended to the times when she slept.
She heaved a little sigh and wriggled back against him.
Greatly daring, he tightened his arm around her, tucking his hand under her ribs. His scrunched left arm tingled a little and he moved it around enough to get it into a comfortable position between her back and his chest. Her bottom pressed against him and the backs of her thighs were against his, and they were folded together. What did they call it, spooning?
He rested his cheek between her shoulder blades and inhaled her scent, warm and organic. This was nice. Really nice. But he couldn't rest, and couldn't get back to sleep. The horror of the nightmare clung to him like smoke. His thoughts had woken up and were pestering him.
People were suffering. People were dying out there. And he was lounging around, cuddling.
He huffed out a breath. The universe was playing a cruel, cruel game, giving him the girl of his dreams and the city he'd longed to rule for so long, and he couldn't enjoy any of it.
Now he had to go to the bathroom. He crawled out from under the covers and stood up carefully. No dizziness, that was good.
It was almost 5:00. Quietly he collected a semi-clean outfit from the closet and hunted down his damp boots and de-gun. He couldn't find his slippers, and where had Minion put his gloves? There were more in the dresser, but the drawers would squeak, and that might wake up Roxanne. He decided to leave them, and slipped out the door.
And immediately tripped over someone lying in the corridor. He flung out an arm to keep from crashing into the wall and the de-gun clattered to the floor.
The man sat up, cursing. "Why don't you watch where yer goin', you stupid..." In the dim light his face transformed into bug-eyed fear. "Oh shit, I'm sorry, boss, I didn't know it was you!"
It was Tony, the wounded henchman he'd carted in yesterday. "Keep your voice down," Megamind hissed, picking up the de-gun and regathering his clothes into a bundle. "What the hell are you doing out here?"
Tony struggled up onto one foot, favoring his hurt leg. "Yer uncles, sir. They told me to keep an eye on you, or they'd mess me up. I'm the new bodyguard, sir."
Megamind ran a hand over his eyes. "Oh for the love of... What are you going to do, hit attackers with your cane?"
Tony looked worried. "I don't got a cane. You want I should get one?"
"Go sleep somewhere else."
He turned to leave. Tony hobbled after him.
Megamind stopped short. "What are you doing?"
"Comin' with you, boss."
"I don't need a bodyguard. Beat it."
"Your uncle Lenny, he was real clear. He's got this big-ass razor. Said he'd cut me. Please, boss." Tony glanced over his shoulder as if he thought Lenny might have sneaked up behind him.
"No offense, Tony, but if you're that scared of a couple of old men, it's not exactly a ringing endorsement of your abilities."
"But...they're your uncles. I thought maybe I oughta do what they say, or you might mess me up, boss. And you was in bed, didn't think I should ask. They didn't have to pull a razor on me, neither," he muttered to himself in a self-pitying way.
Megamind rolled his eyes and waved impatiently at him to follow. Tony hobbled after. He made so much noise Megamind slowed down so he wouldn't wake up the whole Lair.
One of the refugee dads was walking back and forth between the rows with a toddler draped over his shoulder.
"Hard to get 'em down, isn't it?" Megamind said. He jerked a thumb at the hobbling henchman. "Got my own."
The dad eyed him, and then went in the other direction, the toddler watching somberly as she was carried away.
"Was that a joke, boss?" Tony said.
"Apparently not."
He took another step. A sharp stab of pain in the arch of his foot made him leap sideways into a tool trolley. Up and down the Lair, heads lifted from blankets.
Megamind hissed in pain. "What the fuck?"
Legos were scattered over the floor, spilling out of a plastic bucket.
"Legos, boss," Tony said helpfully.
Megamind turned the cheery yellow square over in his fingers. "Like stepping on a caltrop," he growled, and tossed it down. The damn thing made a loud tink noise hitting the floor. More people glanced up, blinking sleepily. He hurried on his way, keeping an eye out for more kids' toys.
Though his personal bathroom was just about unusable and reeked, he used it anyway, while Tony waited outside. There was more room to change clothes in there than in a port-a-potty. Minion should be able to get the sewer pumps back on again soon.
While he shaved, he thought about his list of duties. There were plenty of things to do inside the Lair. He suspected that last night's storm had ended the heat wave, but he decided, with extreme reluctance, that he better at least take some of the doctor's advice. Staying out of the sun for a couple of days was probably a good idea. There was a heaviness in his limbs and a funny 'ping' sensation behind his eyes when he turned his head too quickly, and the memory of the awful fainting spell brought back a hot embarrassment.
And he'd acted like an ungrateful ass. Having people around who gave a damn whether he lived or died was a new, uncomfortable feeling.
A baby cried in the distance, its wails getting more and more insistent, then fading as its caretaker moved farther away.
Formula. They had to find formula. He'd caught a glimpse of Brenda last night, the sole source of human milk and pressed into round-the-clock nursing service, looking extremely harassed, wolfing down leftover Spam and bottled water while the other mothers tried to comfort their crying babies. There must be some formula left in this godforsaken town somewhere.
Or he could locate more nursing mothers. He imagined going door to door, asking if any were available.
He had to do more delegating, pronto. More hovercraft, and electric cars. There were bound to be a few in the sale lots. Biodiesel. There was plenty of used-up cooking oil sitting idle in restaurants, he could transform a few vehicles.
He brushed his teeth vigorously, remembering the dream-mud.
Then there were the informational flyers, and he really ought to get the brainbots to start clearing the streets of garbage, wrecks, and bodies, set up human patrols. They needed to check on Egman's fishery as a potential food source, get those walls built, raid all the remaining home improvement centers, tear down abandoned buildings for girders and brick.
Mind buzzing with possibilities, he finished shaving and went to the monitor station. The big curtain was drawn across it so his activity shouldn't bother the denizens.
Tony sat down noisily in a nearby chair.
Megamind said, "I really don't need a bodyguard. Go back to sleep. And not outside my room."
"But I'm good at it, really, boss. I used to do the guarding for Ms. Hot Flash. I'll stick closer to the wall so's you and your lady don't trip on me. And I'm real discretionary, too, boss. I don't repeat nothin' I hear."
Megamind stiffened. "What did you hear?" he said, narrowing his eyes.
"Not much, boss, just how you might want a hint if she wants a hug, and she don't mind holdin' your hand, and..." His voice faded under the weight of Megamind's glare.
"You," Megamind said coldly. "Will lie down there." He pointed. "Under that exit sign. Go back to sleep."
"But that's almost at the end of the building," Tony said, his face pinched with worry. "Yer Uncle Lenny might..."
"Go," Megamind said between his teeth.
Only after Tony slumped by the wall did Megamind lower his arm and turn back to the monitors.
Roxanne awakened to the gentle strains of a guitar. Somewhere, a woman warbled the first verse of "Amazing Grace" with more enthusiasm than skill.
The pillow beside her was empty. Why am I not surprised? She was, however, disappointed. It would have been nice to wake up next to him. She suspected that getting Megamind to stay put in one place long enough to recover from illness or injury was a full-time job. Minion probably had to tie him down.
She straightened her rumpled clothes and went out.
A man loomed suddenly, holding aloft a stick. "Found one, miss," the man said happily.
"Okay," Roxanne said, eyeing the stick. "That's good."
"A cane, miss," he said, lowering the stick and leaning on it. "Want me to come with?"
"No, I don't think so," she said cautiously. The way was clear, she could kick him in the shin and make a run for it. Then the clouds parted and she remembered where she'd seen him before. "You're Tony, right?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry, miss, I shoulda said. I'm the bodyguard, miss."
She exhaled, then frowned. "Wait. He's making you work, with that injury?"
"It was his uncles' idea, miss."
Roxanne let Tony limp after her while she went to the bathroom. After borrowing some toothpaste from Pilar, she made a quick dash to a sink in the suffocatingly smelly bathroom, scrubbed her teeth and tongue with her finger (having lost her toothbrush), and went to look for Megamind.
Bernard was taping a poster to the side of a metal cabinet.
Women's Shooting Contest! Prizes! Trophies! Win the Esteem of Your Peers!
Grand Prizes: Brand New Electric Car
and
Personal Brainbot Attendant for One Week!
Enter Now!
See Bernard for details.
"Electric car, huh?" she said.
"Pretty sure he stole it," Bernard said. "The brutebots have been carrying them in all morning. There's ten, last time I checked."
"It's not stealing. It's scavenging," Roxanne said.
"Whatever," he muttered. With great weariness, as if she were wasting his time, he pulled out a pen and notebook. "You entering?"
"The shooting contest? I'll think about it." She gave Bernard's red-rimmed eyes a closer look. "You feeling all right?"
He put the notebook away, his lips pressed thin. "The Overlord got me up at dawn. So, no."
She looked around the huge room, but didn't see Megamind among the sea of people. Agnes told her she'd seen Megamind heading for the front of the building, so that's where Roxanne went.
As Overlord, did Megamind truly own everything in the city? she wondered. The companies? Private property? The federal banks? If so, then he wasn't really stealing, if you looked at it in that way, though the U.S. government would have something to say about the banks. She wasn't too concerned about it, really, as it didn't matter at this point, but it was bound to get a lot more interesting when the quarantine ended and people tried to regain their lost property.
She found Megamind talking to a group of mechanics, next to the skeleton of the new hovercraft.
Megamind exuded an air of sheepishness which got even worse when he noticed her approach. His cheekbones were dark pink.
He glanced at her with an agonized look, then turned back to the mechanics. She recognized Gabby, and Luke, whom Megamind often referred to as a pot-head, and several others who had helped carry Megamind in. Uncle Lenny and Uncle Sid watched with interest.
She held back a little, though in this open space there wasn't any way to pretend that she hadn't heard, so she just hung back and waited for Megamind to finish his speech.
Megamind said, "I'm well aware of how insufferable I can be, or so Minion tells me, and, uum..." he rubbed the back of his neck. "What I'm trying... what I'm... I'm just..." He took a deep breath like a man about to plunge into deep water. "Thank you. If it wasn't for your quick action I might not be here today. So!" he said briskly, clasping his hands behind his back. "If there's any way I can repay you. Be happy to oblige. Within reason."
There was a little shuffling among the group, a few embarrassed glances.
Gabby spoke up. "You saved my life, Overlord. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. I guess I don't need anything."
"Yeah," a large man rumbled. "Me too. Just think of it as returning the favor."
There was a murmur of agreement. Megamind ducked his head and coughed into his fist. "Right, right."
"I could go for some beer," someone called from the back. The group chuckled.
"Yeah, let's save the brewery next."
"Hell, I'll volunteer," another said cheerfully.
"Can I set up a still?" Luke said, grinning.
Megamind looked startled for a moment by the laughter, then he grinned. "As long as I get the first pint."
With some more ribbing, the mechanics got back to work.
Roxanne heard the soft rattling of small metal wheels. She looked over her shoulder. A brainbot pushed Megamind's high-backed swivel chair toward them. Taffy the cat lay on it, looking around brightly, her orange tail swishing.
The brainbot brought the chair to Megamind, who scooped Taffy up and fell into the seat with a sigh.
"How're you feeling?" she asked.
"Doing very well," he said.
"You sure you should be up and about?"
"I couldn't sleep," he said, stroking the cat. Two of Doris's grandkids hovered nearby, shifting their weight from foot to foot, working up the nerve to come closer. He glanced at them, then set the cat on the floor. Taffy jumped back into his lap. He flushed. "Get out of here, you're being hailed," he muttered, pushing her off and giving her a little shove with his foot. She twitched her tail, then padded over to the kids.
He sighed and leaned back, closing his eyes. "She likes the chair. I have to keep kicking her off."
Roxanne smiled. "Mm-hm. You're sure you're okay?"
He dipped his head in the affirmative. "I'm not...one hundred percent," he said slowly, the corners of his mouth turned down as if sorely disappointed at how his body had let him down. "I sit every twenty minutes whether I need it or not. I'm being ridiculously cautious."
Bernard walked up with a stack of papers in his arms and cleared his throat loudly.
Megamind looked up. "The information pamphlet? Here," he said, taking the stack and handing it to Roxanne. "The leaflet informing the citizenry of the evolved nature of the virus. And directions to the Lair, should they need assistance and are able to make the journey."
She thumbed through the sheaf.
"In addition, there'll be a squad of messenger 'bots, so citizens can flag brainbots down and send a call to me for help. If anyone dares. Getting people to trust them could be a problem." He chewed his lip. "Maybe I should stress that emergency services will come to the rescue. Do you think if we paint the 'bots bright orange they'll look less threatening?"
"I think you might want to be a little more concise."
"Concise?"
"Get it down to one page."
He drew back. "One page? One?"
"Sweetie, I've read shorter novels."
"But what about this part?" he said, getting up and pointing at the relevent passage. "About the virus's unique structure that makes use of a chemical process that enables it to hibernate until the host body reaches a specific temperature? That'll take at least three and a half."
"But is that something that the average citizen really needs to know?"
"Knowledge is power."
"Look, here's what we'll do. Get a one-page leaflet prepared that we can send out with the most basic information they need to know now, and keep copies of the booklet on hand for anyone who wants to know more. Besides, we need to ration our paper, don't we?"
Megamind took back the papers and sat down again, glumly looking at each page as if each one was a precious jewel. "I guess," he muttered, frowning.
"Could hardly understand. Talked too fast, and there was too much medical jargon. Then you pushed me off the computer," Bernard complained. "I don't know why you even bothered waking me up."
"Bernard, make ten copies of the novel." He glanced up at her as if to make sure she noticed he'd adopted her phrase. "I'll have a short, concise flyer ready before noon."
Bernard slouched off.
"Hey, how's the new bodyguard workin' out, kid?" Uncle Sid grinned.
"Thanks a lot," Megamind said, shooting a look at Tony, who was hovering some distance away. "An injured bodyguard I don't need and never asked for."
"He needed the work. Don't take much to keep an eye on your door, does it?"
The opening chords to a jauntier song floated out from behind the generator, behind which the unseen musician was practicing with gusto.
Megamind growled, "If I hear "This Little Light of Mine" one more time, I'll break that guitar. Tony, go tell her that practice time's over."
"Yes, sir!" Tony said, grinning and cracking his knuckles. He hitched his makeshift cane around and began to make his way over.
Megamind stared after him, then shouted, "Politely. Do not break the guitar."
"So we've got a musician," Roxanne said.
"Pastor Mike's wife," Megamind said. "She knows three songs. And now I know them, too. Forever and ever. I'm shipping Tony back to the plant. I don't need a bodyguard who so recently worked for one of my opponents. What happens if Hot Flash gets her powers back and decides she's not that washed up after all? See any conflict of interest here?"
Uncle Lenny waved a hand, brushing off the protest. "He's got that code. All those henchmen gotta go by that code."
"Code?" Roxanne asked.
"Henchman's code," Megamind said. "Undying loyalty to the boss, until employment is transferred, or the boss kicks you out, or the underground hideout goes up in flames taking the boss with it, whatever comes first. But I don't want him sleeping outside my door, listening."
Roxanne stiffened. "He heard? Our...our talk?"
Megamind nodded. "Every word." He glared at his uncles. Roxanne put her hands on her hips.
Sid and Lenny were unmoved by their combined outrage. "You want my advice," Uncle Sid said.
"No," Megamind said.
"You want my advice," Sid repeated doggedly, "you bring all them henchmen here, away from their old boss. Get 'em used to taking orders from you."
"Seems like certain people around here only take orders when they feel like it," Megamind said. "Didn't I say the private rooms were for temporary use?"
Lenny shrugged his big shoulders. "First time in a long time we had any real privacy, Blue."
Sid pulled a long face. "Yeah, you wouldn't kick your ol' uncles out of their room? We're just gettin' settled."
"Got the new curtains and all."
Sid batted his eyes at Lenny. "Second honeymoon and that." Lenny swatted him on the butt and they both laughed.
Megamind rubbed his eyes. "Okay. Just. Okay. Enough. Jesus. Keep the damn room."
Minion hurried up to them in a flurry of agitation. "It's after nine. Why didn't anyone wake me up?"
"You need your rest too, filet mignon," Megamind said. He was about to say something else, but Minion broke in.
"How long have you been up?" he cried. "You need to take it easy, get more rest!"
Megamind pushed himself back and forth in the chair. "I'm sitting down," he said, his fingers laced together over his stomach. "Doesn't this count as resting?"
Minion's mouth opened and shut a couple of times, and then he deflated, his fins sagging. "Oh. Yeah, I guess. You could at least put on a t-shirt."
"I'm not traipsing around in public with naked arms."
"We're in the Lair."
"And the public is in it."
Minion flung up his hands. "You have to be careful not to get overheated."
Roxanne put her hand on Minion's hairy forearm. "It's pretty cool in here, Minion. I don't think there's too much danger of that as long as he stays inside."
"That's right," Megamind sniffed. "And outside, it is a positively chilly 58 degrees Fahrenheit. The heat wave's over."
"But you're supposed to be in bed. The doctor said for a week." He spun in his bowl, as if searching for her so she could back him up.
"I think we all know that's not going to happen," Megamind said, steepling his fingers, smug that Roxanne had taken his side. "How about you assemble that crew and get the sewer pumps working? I'll be stationed at the monitors, sitting quietly, awaiting your progress report."
"That sounds like a good idea," Roxanne said. "Except I'll be the one on monitor duty. You'll be in your room."
Megamind's smile vanished. "But-"
"That sounds perfect," Minion said quickly. "Let's go, Sir."
Megamind's gaze darted from Roxanne to Minion. "Fine," he said, crossing his arms, wiggling more firmly into the chair's black leather. "Push me back."
Minion scoffed. "You're that tired?"
"I must be, everybody keeps insisting," Megamind said, sticking out his jaw. He cast a sideways look at Roxanne, and gave her a sly grin. "Need a lift?"
There was a stunned silence. Lenny and Sid stared. Roxanne drew in a breath. She studied his face, the smirk, the challenging tilt of his eyebrow. It's a dare. He's being childish and...and, oh hell, why not?
"Don't mind if I do," she said, and slid onto Megamind's lap, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, lightly, mindful of the spikes. Megamind's eyes widened briefly with surprise and then a wide smile spread over his face.
She looked up at Minion. "Well? We're ready."
"Yeah, wheel us back." Megamind said cheerfully.
"You guys are weird," Minion muttered, but he began pushing the swivel chair across the floor.
The mechanics and welders stopped work to watch them trundle by. Someone let out a low whistle. Though she felt her cheeks heat up, Roxanne gazed calmly ahead with a casual smile, as if this was a perfectly ordinary way to travel. The little wheels squeaked.
"Through the whole Lair, then?" Minion said with sarcastic cheer. "Give everyone a good look?"
"Nonsense," Megamind said airily. "Go behind the shelving as soon as convenient. No need to make a spectacle."
Roxanne lowered one hand to rest on the blue hand wrapped around her waist. She was glad he'd left off the long gloves, as there were fewer spikes to deal with. His other arm was clamped firmly to the armrest to keep them from getting pitched onto the floor.
She shared a glance with him. He arched an eyebrow at her and she had to look away before she broke into undignified giggles. His thumb stroked her side.
They passed into the main room. Minion cut across to the corridor lined with shelves, but not before several people did double takes, including Britney, Roxanne noticed with malicious glee. They went behind the shelves and were hidden from general view.
The air felt electric and she was feeling good. From long practice with romantic entanglements, she could sense where this was headed. This was the kind of silly bonding moment that could lead straight to the bedroom. Which was, of course, where they were headed.
Down, girl, she chided herself. He collapsed yesterday, remember that? The almost-got-heat-stroke thing? Yeah, that. Besides, I can't ditch Minion. He's expecting a little support while he's out there working to get the city operational again. Her cheeks heated up again, this time with shame. She shouldn't be thinking about fooling around. Maybe later tonight, maybe...
Megamind squirmed. She glanced at him and caught a look of discomfort a split second before he smoothed it over with a smile again.
"You okay?"
"Yes, of course, why wouldn't I be?" His knuckles on the armrest were white.
"Here we are," Minion said.
Roxanne hopped up. "Yep, here we are," she said, with a nervous chuckle. "See you later."
"Yep, see you," Megamind said. He rushed into the room and slammed the door.
Minion tsk-ed. "You're welcome."
Roxanne stared at the closed door, then spun on her heel and walked away, Minion trotting after her.
"It's real easy, Miss Ritchi," Minion said. "I'll show you the comm."
"Good, good," she said, rubbing her arms. It was stupid to feel hurt. She hadn't really been planning on following him in there. He needed rest. It was good that she'd talked herself out of it.
"When you get the chance, think you could call the folks at the fire station and the water plant? See how they're doing, if they need anything?" Minion said.
"Oh, sure. No problem." But he'd practically run away from her. What was up with that? She bit her lip. Had she come on too strong? But so what, he was the one who dared me to sit with him, she thought with a flash of anger. And he'd seemed fine with it, but was she too... too heavy?
That couldn't be right. He was a lot stronger than he looked. Once during a kidnapping he'd picked her up and the chair to which she was tied, and all but ran into another room to get her away from an unexpected flood of acid.
"Miss Ritchi?"
She shook her head. "Oh. Sorry. What was that?"
"I said if you can, maybe find some more people to work the comm?" Minion said. "Because maybe we should have someone stationed there all the time, in case of emergency."
"Yeah, sure, we definitely should do that."
They walked in silence to the monitors. Minion showed her the controls, then said, "I think he's pretty tired, Miss Ritchi. He probably felt like he was about to pass out again or something. And he doesn't want you to see him like that. He's so..." Minion rolled his eyes and waved his hands.
Roxanne smiled, and felt some of the tightness leave her shoulders. "Thanks, Minion. Yeah, he's not back to full strength yet." She pushed her bangs out of her eyes, wishing for either a barrette or a haircut. He wasn't well, that was all.
Megamind stood in the middle of the room with his hands over his mouth. I can't believe I did that. He hadn't really expected her to accept his offer, for evil's sake! He'd said the first thing that popped into his head because he was mad that everybody was telling him what to do. Minion scolding, Sid and Lenny lecturing. The brazen offer of a ride was meant to shock and annoy.
He thought she'd laugh it off, or scold him or something. Some form of snide comeback. When she slid onto his lap, for a few heady seconds he thought he was hallucinating. If so, it was a damn good hallucination.
At first, it had gone well. They'd been sharing a moment! A ridiculous, silly moment. When she'd met his gaze and had to suck in her lips to keep from laughing he felt like they were a real couple sharing a secret joke.
He could feel the warmth of her arm through his collar. She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, and the urge to kiss the heck out of her became almost overwhelming. To kiss that lovely pink earlobe, for example. It was right there. Not to mention the sweep of her neck and the line of her clavicle, so teasingly, slightly exposed by the disarray of her collar.
Getting Roxanne into the swivel chair with him was a long-time fantasy, and his body was trying to cash in. His clothes felt too tight. The jolting of the chair as the wheels caught in seams and cracks wasn't helping, either. The hand he'd kept around her waist felt hot, and the way her hip flared out just below his fingertips invited to be explored. The heat in his pelvis was becoming unmanageable.
In an extremely casual and not-at-all-noticeable way, he'd tried to shift to the side so she wasn't sitting right on his lap, which was pretty much impossible. Nothing physical had been happening yet, but he recognized the signs, and he was so relieved when they got to the bedroom that he... he...
Slammed the door in her face.
He shuffled over to the nearest blank spot on the wall and thumped his head against it for a while. Idiot, idiot. What better way to show a woman you cared than by running away as if she had the plague?
The rumpled blankets still lay on the floor in a forlorn heap. She wasn't going to want to share a bed with him tonight, that was certain.
He was just so used to hiding his true feelings. It had seemed like the only logical course of action was to flee before she noticed how turned on he was. Besides, what was he going to do, tell her to ditch Minion? Carry her into the room so they could make out? She would've told him to get his mind out of the gutter. Now was not the time for fooling around.
Oh, who was he kidding, he was scared. Flat-out scared. He wasn't even sure what he was afraid of, exactly, but part of it was fear that she'd reject him. And not just for this one time, but reject him utterly, and refuse to have anything more to do with him. Women always got turned off when men pushed things too far, too early. There were entire movies dedicated to the subject.
He was afraid, as simple as that. God, he was pathetic. He, Megamind, who laughed in the face of danger and challenged the gods, fate, and death itself, had panicked.
He sat on the mattress, kicked off his boots, and shucked off the accesories, but he was too wound up to rest. Disgusted with himself, he reached into his pants. At least afterwards he should be able to sleep.
Minion called to report that the first sewer pump had been successfully restarted, and that the Lair should be experiencing some relief soon. The second pump was also restarted without incident, and there was a little more good news; Minion found an ambulance, and a sports rehabilitation clinic. He and the crew cleaned up on crutches, canes, bandages and splints, implements for stitches, and triple-strength Tylenol.
"We're starting to draw a lot of zombie attention, though," he said grimly. "They've been trailing us ever since we came out of the second tunnel. The brainbots are keeping them back, but I don't think we can stop to do much more foraging."
"Yes, better get the other pumps going," Roxanne said. "Stay safe."
"We're gonna fly ahead of them. Way ahead," Minion said. "Try to shake them, get some distance. I want more breathing space. Don't want to end up fighting zombies just to get out of the manhole."
"Good idea." Roxanne frowned. "Is somebody hurt? I hear crying." All she could see onscreen was Minion's face and scenery passing by, but there was some high-pitched whimpering coming from somewhere, cutting through the hum of the motor.
He grimaced and glanced over his shoulder. "That's Arnold. He's not hurt, but there was kind of... an incident. In the last tunnel," he whispered. "We were heading out, and...well, a leg floated by. He's freaking out."
Roxanne swallowed. "Ugh. Poor guy. Do you want to bring him back?"
"I'd like to," Minion sighed. "But I feel like we should keep going. I want to keep up the momentum. I think Arnold'll be all right as long as he stays with the hovercraft. He's not going down any more tunnels."
Minion signed off. Roxanne thought about going to check on Megamind as it had been a couple of hours, or maybe taking a look at her recordings again, but there was a lot of shouting coming from somewhere in the Lair.
She sighed and went to see what that was all about.
She found Dr. Plant and a number of other people trying to calm down a wild-eyed man.
Dr. Plant rounded on her. "What's the meaning of this?" she shouted.
"How should I know?" Roxanne said. "I don't even know who that is."
"He was in the morgue, dehydrated," Dr. Plant said. "Noelle and I were doing some I.D. work, and then..."
"The zombies!" the stranger cried. "Where's my wife? Who are you people?"
"Be quiet," Noelle snapped. She scowled at Roxanne. "How many more prisoners does our Overlord have?"
Roxanne bristled at the accusation, then took a deep breath. Shouting back at Noelle would only make things worse. "Everyone needs to calm down. I'll go get him. I'm sure there's a perfectly good explanation."
When she fetched him from his room, blinking sleep out of his eyes, he was quiet and subdued, and kept shooting her nervous looks. She tried to smile reassuringly at him to show that she understood, though the door-slamming had startled her, it wasn't a big deal, really, but for some reason he was unable to meet her gaze. She suppressed a sigh. They'd have to talk later.
Megamind explained to everyone about his first night of rescue work.
"Zombies were breaking down your door, remember?" he said to the strange man, who had plastered himself against a wall.
The man goggled at him. "Remember them? Hell, yeah! They were all over the place. But how did I get here?"
"To you, it seems like only a minute ago. Look, everyone was screaming, none of you were listening, I had to get you out of there. So, uh..." he grinned apologetically. "Zap, zap, and the brainbots scooped you up and away."
"Oh my God," the man whispered. "How long have I been a cube? Please, just tell me where my family is. Did you save everyone?"
"Yes, of course, I just have to remember where I put them." Megamind hurried into the morgue, followed by Roxanne and Dr. Plant.
"You could have warned me," Dr. Plant snapped. "How long have you been hiding people in here?"
"Only about a month. I had to put them somewhere," Megamind retorted, pushing cubes around. "These cubes aren't even in Tupperware. The corpses are all over on those shelves, in Tupperware."
The doctor flung up her arms and let them fall again. "That little detail might have been good to know. I think I had a minor stroke when that man jumped up. Thought he was a zombie that didn't get properly killed. Noelle almost cracked him over the head with the crowbar."
"You've got a crowbar in here?"
"Yes! In case a zombie didn't get properly killed, I just explained. When, exactly, were you planning on freeing these poor people?"
"I did save their lives, you know," Megamind said. "And I didn't want to rehydrate them en masse. Imagine that hysterical survivor, multiplied by one hundred seventy-two.
They looked at each other. Megamind stared at the cubes in his hands in a helpless sort of way.
Roxanne said, "Do you remember which ones are that man's family?"
"Uhhh..." Megamind turned over the cubes as if searching for clues. "Normally, I would, but... There was...a lot of confusion, running in and out, that sort of thing... I might have mixed up some of them."
Dr. Plant rubbed her hands down her face. "I'm going to need more coffee. Let's get the pastor over here, and that medic at the station."
Roxanne nodded. "The firefighters, too, in their gear, and the police officers. Their presence will help."
"We can rehydrate them outside," Megamind said. "Out under the sun, the open sky, it's really quite nice out."
After a short debate, they decided to bite the bullet and rehydrate everyone. Roxanne found the next few hours to be very trying. Having to constantly reassure each group of newly-rehydrated "guests" that they were safe, and Megamind had only meant to save them was exhausting. The pastor and the emergency personnel did help, or at least gave them a target for their hysteria.
Better them than me, Roxanne thought with a trace of guilt, as she watched a sobbing woman fling herself at one of the uniformed cops and cling to him as if he was her last hope. Roxanne was a sympathetic person and usually was happy to lend an ear, but at the moment her emotional reserves felt quite low. She had to remind herself that, after all, as far as the new people were concerned, it was still the very first night of the quarantine, and the horror was fresh in their minds.
She was mainly standing by to help explain the situation to them once they'd calmed down, to direct them to the Lair, to the bathrooms (or port-a-potties), to clean clothes and food. Some people confronted her, demanding to know when Metro Man was going to show up.
"He's not here. Megamind is," she said, in no mood to mince words. "He's the one who saved you, and he's going to save this city."
A bit grandiose, perhaps, but by God she was going to make sure everyone knew who the real hero was.
Megamind sat in the swivel chair in the shade of the building, scowling with his chin on his fist. His presence brought alarm at first, but after a while his lack of activity, villainous or otherwise, convinced the new refugees that he didn't necessarily mean them any harm right at that very moment. Gradually calm and order began to emerge. Nonetheless all the racket made her teeth ache.
Roxanne felt like she needed a break. The afternoon had grown warm, though without the suffocating heat of the previous days, and a cool wind blew off the lake. She walked out through the gate, stopping to pat Spider-bot on the leg, then continued on down to the water a block away.
Doris sat on a broken retaining wall a ways down the beach, her grandchildren and other assorted kids running around on the packed dirt, shouting. One of them, Billy, she thought, stood ankle deep in the water with a fishing rod. A few older kids wandered aimlessly, or played with the younger ones.
Roxanne sat down by the same wall, some distance away. It was relaxing, just watching kids goof off.
A shadow fell over her. "Roxie?"
She squinted up. "Oh! Hal!" She scrambled to her feet. "Good to see you."
Though she wasn't actually glad to see him. The words had flown out automatically, because that's what you said to a co-worker whom you hadn't seen since the zombie apocalypse started. She especially didn't feel like talking to him after hearing why he'd gotten booted out of the Lair.
"Oh, it's really great to see you, too!" Hal said, stepping toward her, arms out. "You're alive!"
She stepped back quickly, holding up her hand. "No, that's okay, I'm fine, I don't need a hug." Gaah, I'm such a coward, she berated herself. You're a creep, Hal, and I don't want to hug you. That's what she should have said.
But she'd fallen into her old habits of dealing with Hal, of pretending not to notice his advances, so she had to stand there smiling and acting like nothing was wrong, though she found she was wishing she'd brought her gun. "I'm okay." She wrapped her arms around her middle and half turned away.
His face fell, and he let his hands fall to his sides. "So, uh, what're you doing here? You get 'rescued'?" He made air quotes with his fingers.
There was a nasty tone to his voice. "Mm-hm. Rescued. By the Overlord."
Hal's face became sullen. "Overlord," he snorted. He picked up a rock and threw it toward the water. It fell short, bouncing on the dirt. "So he's got a fancy new nickname. Must be nice, living in the Lair. It's so boring out here. And Minion didn't give me nothin' but beans for the last two days. Sucks."
"Well, maybe if you could find a way to show him you won't spy on people anymore, he'll let you back in."
"I wasn't spying, I was just looking," Hal muttered, kicking a rock. "Wasn't even a big deal, it was an accident. Didn't see anything anyway."
Roxanne pressed her lips together and watched the kids. Billy tugged hard on his fishing rod, making it bend, but the line had gotten caught on something. He took his shoes off, then waded into the water, running his hands along the line. Doris was waving her hand at the other children, her high piping voice expressing concern.
Roxanne didn't think Doris had noticed Billy going into the water. Was it safe around here? There might be a drop-off. She began to walk in that direction, thinking of telling Billy to come back in.
"Hey, I know," Hal said, snapping his fingers. "You could put in a good word for me, Roxie. You know, 'cuz we're friends? That's what friends do."
She was afraid of that. "That's not how it works, Hal. You're assuming I want a peeping Tom in the Lair."
Hal stuck out his lip. "I'm tellin' you, I didn't see anything anyway. He's the villain. What's he up to, huh? That's what I want to know. Bet he's worse."
Roxanne walked a little faster. No, he's not. He doesn't make creepy unwanted advances.
Doris had noticed Billy wading in, and was shrilly telling him to be careful. Though it was no longer necessary for Roxanne to keep an eye on Billy now that his guardian had spotted him, Roxanne felt a need for company, someone other than Hal, so she continued to head over to Doris.
A big fish broke the water's surface. Roxanne shaded her eyes against the glare of sunlight on the waves. It hadn't dived down, was it a turtle?
In the next second things happened very quickly, with a suddenness that froze the breath in her lungs.
The realization that it wasn't a fish.
That it was a zombie, rising up.
Yanking Billy off his feet, pulling him down.
