Warning; death of a child.
Song lyrics from "Hair of the Dog" by Nazareth.
Never thought I'd get this chapter finished. These past few months have been a chaotic, stressful time; my mother-in-law has been in poor health since her stroke, and we're all taking turns staying with her so that she can continue to live in her own home.
The metro bus, powered by brainbots, shuttled the hotel refugees to the Lair while Megamind called for the doctor, the pastor, and Bernard to put together an armed escort and meet him at the water treatment plant. The brainbots had been busy getting abandoned cars and other debris off the streets near the safe zone so the route should be clear.
He needed the doctor to make a firm diagnosis, the pastor to possibly handle the mother, and Bernard to fill out the paperwork, and Megamind was feeling a great need for proper paperwork.
Though no amount of documentation would ever truly be enough to satisfy his conscience.
Reuben, the plant director, met Megamind when he arrived, along with Hot Flash, who seemed unable to give up the reins of leadership easily. Once a boss, always a boss.
They filled him in on the situation and introduced him to the baby's father, who looked like he'd fallen into the lowest pit of hell and might never find his way out. He said that the baby had been sick with fever and died two days ago. More than enough time for zombification.
Megamind took a deep breath and stepped into the employee break room. Minion ducked under the door frame, followed by his entourage, Pastor Mike, the doctor, Bernard, and the witnesses. Having witnesses was the doctor's idea. Reuben had stepped up, and two other people whose names he hadn't caught, but were presumably citizens of good standing.
They would all need to be in agreement on the status of the child before Megamind took action.
The woman sat on the floor by an empty vending machine, holding onto a large red cooler. The lid was strapped down with duct tape. Humming an off-pitch tune, she stared at a spot on the wall, or perhaps was focusing on whatever was in her mind.
Something inside the cooler thumped and scratched.
The woman's head turned jerkily around as they filed in, until her gaze settled on Megamind.
"Are you the doctor?" she asked. Her bare, dirty feet tapped restlessly on the linoleum.
Dr. Plant cleared her throat. "That's Megamind. Do you know who he is?"
The woman's forehead wrinkled. "So he's not the doctor?"
Dr. Plant gave up. "I'm the doctor."
The woman twitched and clawed at her neck, whispering to herself, then announced, loudly, "Wendy's sick. Real sick."
Pastor Mike took a careful step toward her. "What's your name?"
"Kelly."
Dr. Plant made soothing noises as she walked around the tables toward her, followed by the pastor. "I'm going to examine your daughter, is that all right, Kelly? You have other children?"
Kelly tightened her grip on the cooler, which had given a sudden lurch. "Yes, three more. Wendy's my baby. Her birthday was last week!" she shouted. Her lips stretched back over her teeth and a bizarre wheeze came out of her that might have been laughter.
Dr. Plant swallowed. "Oh, um. That's nice."
Megamind felt that he was doing a pretty good job of not running out of the room screaming. He glanced at the others to see how they were holding up. Minion was mournful but stoic. The witnesses' horrified attention was riveted on the cooler. One of them put a hand on the wall to steady herself, but otherwise the three of them seemed determined to see it through.
Bernard was the worst off. Hugging the laptop to his chest, he pressed against a wall as if trying to pass through it and his face bore a waxy resemblance to a corpse.
Megamind took pity on him. "Wait in the hall," he said quietly.
Bernard fled the room.
Dr. Plant and the pastor were trying to persuade Kelly to let go of the cooler.
Turning his back for cover, Megamind switched the setting on the de-gun. He would take care of the mother first. There was no psych ward, no sedatives, and no psychiatric care other than Pastor Mike's family counseling, and Megamind didn't think that was going to cut it here.
Kelly glared at him as he crossed the room toward her. He half expected her to growl. Keeping his tone light he said, "Will you stand over there with Minion, please? I promise no harm will come to your daughter."
Kelly's eyes burned into him. Like the lying son of a bitch he was, he held her gaze, and at last, very reluctantly, she let Minion take her aside.
He and Minion exchanged glances, and the henchfish stepped back, allowing Megamind to dehydrate her.
He picked up the cube from the floor and when he straightened again, he caught Pastor Mike staring at him. The pastor looked away.
"You disapprove," Megamind said.
Pastor Mike shifted his weight. "I...I understand," he murmured. "But I wish it wasn't necessary. She needs help, not..." His voice trailed away.
"I wish the same, padre." He got out the jackknife to cut away the tape. "Are we ready?"
Dr. Plant insisted on taking its temperature, to make absolutely sure, so there would be no doubt, as if physical appearance wasn't enough. All witnesses agreed it was a zombie, Dr. Plant shakily adding her voice to the consensus...
He'd destroyed child zombies before, but never one so little.
After it was all over he drifted down the hallway, Minion falling into step at his shoulder.
Hot Flash slumped in a folding chair down the hall, a lumpy hand-rolled cigarette dangling from her mouth. Irwin leaned against the wall by her side. She watched Megamind approach, then heaved herself to her feet. "Here," she said, shoving something at him.
Megamind stared at her. Hot Flash shook the object in her hand, making a sloshy noise. "Here, take it already," she growled out of the corner of her mouth.
He focused on the flask.
Minion said, "I don't think that's-"
Megamind grabbed it and had a swig. The liquor stripped a layer of cells off his throat lining as it went down and the pain was almost enough to blot out the images burned into his brain.
Probably wasn't a good idea to accept a drink from a former enemy, come to that. It was a warning sign he should have heeded that he was too worked up.
He raised the flask again.
"Hey, gimme it." Hot Flash grabbed it back. "Don't hog it all." She sneered at Minion's frown. "Take it easy, fish boy. It's not poisoned." She took a drink and wiped her mouth. "I didn't sign up for this crap," she muttered. "I wanna know why you haven't taken my henchmen yet."
He rubbed his eyes. "Taken them where?" Aargh, that booze. His stomach was already complaining.
"To your damn Lair. Their families, too. I'm sick of lookin' at 'em."
He dropped his hands and studied her. Her henchmen were painful reminders of what she'd lost. She could still be a formidable crime boss, except that she'd lost the taste for it along with her powers, though it was clear she found it hard to give up leadership completely. She was the one who'd called the Lair about the crisis.
"The plant needs protection," he said. "They should stay here."
"Send over some different gunmen, then."
"I'll consider it."
Hot Flash stiffened.
Megamind looked around. The father of the dead baby shuffled toward them. Megamind tensed, not knowing what kind of reaction the man would have for the supervillain who'd ended his daughter's existence.
Minion moved around so he stood slightly in front of Megamind.
The man's hollow eyes moved blearily from Minion to Megamind and he shuffled to a halt. "Thank you. Thank you for help...help..." His face grew pinched and he crumpled to the floor, weeping.
Megamind stared at him, then strode away. He passed by other hallways grown more crowded with new arrivals claiming spaces for sleep and for their bags of clothes, staking out their little territories, frightened of the zombies outside, fearful of the other refugees, shrinking away from the Overlord as he swept by.
He crossed the lobby and went outside, flinging the door back so it banged against the wall.
The prison bus sat in the scant shade of one of the dead trees. The four prisoners sat on it, guarded by three police officers and three ex-cons, an even mix. He'd wanted to keep an eye on them, and there weren't any cells at the Lair, so he'd brought them along. He still didn't know what to do with them. Maybe he'd dangle them in cages over the alligator pit. No reason they had to be comfortable.
He paced a circle over the burned grass, a slow roar building in his gut like a funnel cloud.
Coast guard boats crawled back and forth on the lake's horizon. Megamind turned slowly, running his gaze over the city. Out beyond the buildings, the army sat on its collective ass. Doing nothing.
It was impossible to keep going day after day on a never-ending diet of rage, but Megamind felt that he'd passed through rage and come out the other side into some new emotion he didn't have words for.
He would have to take a break soon. But not yet. If he tried to rest now he'd begin an inexorable slide into madness and not even Minion's love would be able to bring him back. Not even Roxanne's...concern.
(Did she love him? Could she ever love him? It was too much to bear thinking about.)
He was still a supervillain, damn it, and now he was going to do what he did best: confront an overwhelmingly powerful foe with nothing but his wits, his 'bots, and his kick-ass disregard for life and limb.
Minion took a step back from his smile. "Uh. You okay, Sir?"
"Prepare some entrance music," Megamind said. "It's time the army and I had a little talk."
"Okay, just let me go find the invisi-shield," Minion said. "I think we stored it in..."
"No time for that. We're going now."'
Music thundered over the deserted landscape of Highway 81. Two brainbots led the way, waving huge white bedsheets. Four more brainbots carrying large clunky cameras soared back and forth, shooting the scene from all angles and aiming the lenses at the army troops.
The chorus blared out. Now you're messin' with a...Son of a BI-ITCH! (now you're messin' with a sonovabitch)
Megamind directed Spee-ider-bot down the middle of the highway, with the giant holographic image of his head projected directly above. Brainbots and brutebots filled the sky behind him and a guard drove the prison bus in his wake. On the bus, Minion stood next to the driver and spoke into Megamind's comm. "I'd say stop about fifty yards back from the truck," he said. "That should be close enough. Don't want 'em to start shooting."
As instructed, he stopped fifty yards short of the burned out husk of the truck. The same truck he'd seen from a distance the first night of the quarantine, getting blown up.
He nudged Spee-ider-bot a few steps closer. "Who's in charge here? The Overlord of Metrocity would like to speak with them." His voice boomed out of the hologram's mouth, echoing across the land.
Soldiers milled behind the barricade down the road, until one figure edged to the front and lifted a tiny megaphone. After a loud screech and a burst of static, a crackly voice said, "No one's allowed past the quarantine line. Please stand back before we're..."
"That's not what I asked, fool." Megamind's amplified voice overrode him. "I asked who was in charge."
"Sir," Minion said through his teeth. "There's a lot of guns. I would really like you to tone down the arrogance a little."
"You're talking to Major Rutherford," came the crackly response.
"I want to collect the bodies of my citizens. That okay with you?" He held out a hand toward the truck and the skeletons lying around and inside it. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't shoot at us while we complete our task."
The major's head moved back and forth as he talked with the soldiers on either side of him. There was a shrugging of shoulders. He lifted the megaphone again. "What about those robots?"
"My pets. Brought them along for some exercise."
Major Rutherford and the soldiers eyed the gently undulating swarm, bristling with bear trap jaws and spikes and lasers. Quiet, but waiting for their master's command.
"Go ahead," the major said.
Megamind gestured at his volunteers. The prison bus moved forward cautiously until it drew level with the truck. Two henchmen, two police officers, and a few other denizens came down the steps. With the help of the brainbots, and equipped with hooks and heavy gloves, they began gathering the five skeletons into body bags.
The 'bots drifted overhead like a cross-section of toothy undersea wildlife, glowing blue and red, making the air vibrate with their humming.
On the soldiers' side a humvee with a .50 caliber Browning M2 machine gun on its roof rolled up to the barricade.
The atmosphere was thick with everyone not shooting at each other.
Megamind wished Roxanne was there to see him in action. He imagined her directing the camerabots to get the best angles and doing her spiel for the camera, perhaps throwing in a few pointed, sarcastic comments about his performance. He loved that.
A little late to call her over to join in, unfortunately. He turned his attention back to Major Rutherford. "Since you've cut off all TV and radio signals, I'd like some information. How long will the quarantine last?"
"I'm not authorized to give out that information," the major said in a flat voice.
Megamind raised on a eyebrow. Not authorized? Possibly double-speak for 'no one's told me jack shit.' Out loud he said, "On behalf of Metrocity, I request that the electricity be turned back on. The power plant shut down quite some time ago, as I'm sure you've noticed, and we don't have the means to get it started again. It would be a simple matter to reroute power from the grid that serves the adjacent counties. I'll gladly foot the bill, for the time being, if you arrange for me to transfer my bank numbers on a secure line."
He didn't think they'd agree to it or even had any real influence with the electric company, but it didn't hurt to ask. Besides, his generous offer was getting filmed. Once again, the distant figure consulted with others. Megamind got the sense that they couldn't quite believe their ears. He waited, letting Spee-ider-bot amble back and forth as it wanted, its legs casting long shadows over the highway and the dried grass. The sun was a red disk sinking into the lake.
"Here's an easier one," Megamind said. "We're running out of food. When can we expect relief packages? I'll help distribute them."
Guilty silence greeted this request.
Megamind drummed his fingers on the control panel. "So when can I tell my citizens to expect life-saving food and medical supplies?"
"I don't know of any plan to provide supplies." The major cleared his throat and changed the subject. "Megamind, I have some leaflets here that..."
"Lord Megamind," Megamind interrupted.
"What?"
"I insist on the proper title. You may call me Lord Megamind, or Overlord."
There was a longer silence, during which Minion cursed quietly.
The major's voice, when it spoke again, was rather cold. "Lord Megamind, there're some leaflets here that make a number of unsubstantiated claims. I have to warn you that propaganda that disturbs the peace and incites panic in the population is a serious crime, punishable by a..."
"It's not designed," Megamind turned up the volume so that his voice echoed off buildings half a mile away. "To set off panic. It's the honest, unvarnished truth. There's been one suicide that I know of precisely because of misinformation. For my citizens to realize that contracting the virus is not an automatic death sentence will, I hope, prevent further tragedies. Surely you don't want to see even more innocent Americans killed. The world is watching." Megamind cast a significant look at one of the camerabots.
"How about you give us back our drones?" Rutherford snapped.
It was so cute, the way he kept trying to seize control. Megamind smiled. Overhead, his giant teeth flashed almost as brightly as his eyes. "Drones? You mean those funny little toy helicopters that've been invading the privacy of my citizens? Those drones? Haven't seen any," he said briskly. "But I'll be sure to keep an eye out for them. Incidentally, on that note..." He gestured for the prisoners to be brought forward.
Their guards prodded them off the bus. Megamind had a camerabot project their images alongside his own, though the prisoners kept their heads down, trying to hide their identities.
"Let's say I happen to find some army-related trifles lying around unattended and return them to you. What'll you give me? Because I could really go for twenty thousand pounds of non-perishable food and a M.A.S.H. unit or two. Our hospitals are a mess."
"Anyone who goes into the city is subject to the quarantine," Rutherford said. "No one comes back out."
"Guess it works both ways, then. Everyone and anything in this city is subject to my rule, to be dealt with however I see fit." With that he drew the de-gun to dehydrate the prisoners, starting with Private Becker. Becker shrieked a little, thinking he was about to get snuffed, and then he was cubed.
Dr. Bob's pink face turned red. "How dare you!" he shouted.
Megamind shot and dehydrated the next two, making Dr. Bob's eyebrows bristle with fury. "You have no idea who you're dealing..." Megamind shot him, cutting off the tirade in a burst of glittering light. Minion put the cubes in a fanny pack.
He holstered the de-gun as Spee-ider-bot bounced around. "Maybe I'll make them into a necklace. Major Rutherford, if you could pass on my requests for food and medical assistance to someone who can actually do something for us, I'd be most grateful. You have my number? What a silly question, you're blocking me, of course you do. Oh, and one more thing. Just a little tidbit you might find interesting. Your stupid quarantine doesn't work. Zombies are walking on the lakebed."
"That's not possible. Zombies don't go into water more than three feet deep, everybody knows that."
"These do, fool," Megamind said. "Open your damn eyes. They've learned a new trick. Some of them came out of the lake right by my Lair. They could wander into Chicago, Duluth, Canada, or anywhere along the thousands of miles of wilderness lakeshore, if they haven't already."
Mission accomplished, Megamind led the way back, sending Spee-ider-bot leaping ahead, bouncing from street to building and back again, while the prison bus followed along as best it could. "That went rather well, wouldn't you say, Minion?"
"Sir," Minion said through the comm, "I hate to burst your bubble, but you never actually said who those prisoners were."
"I most certainly did."
"Pretty sure you didn't."
"Ah, but I implied it. Very, very strongly."
"Yeah, but..."
"They were included in my 'army-related trifles' comment."
"Well, I guess so, but don't you think it looked like you just dehydrated some random guys?"
"Don't be ridiculous, filet mignon. Couldn't be clearer. Splashed their images up there for everyone to see, they'll figure it out. It's hardly my fault if they can't keep track of their soldiers."
When Roxanne got back, the Lair was in a certain amount of chaos from yet another infusion of refugees.
"They're from a hotel," Pilar informed her. "About a hundred of them. There was a sniper, and Minion got shot..."
Roxanne gasped.
"In the suit," Pilar said hastily. "His robot suit. He had to replace it, but I'm sure he's okay. That sewer man got hurt, too." She looked around. "Our Overlord must've found a nursing home, too."
"But, the sniper?"
"Blew him to bits, is what I heard." Pilar lowered her voice. "Martin Finney died a little while ago."
"Oh no. Oh, that's too bad," Roxanne said, trying to sound sympathetic, and she was sorry that the old widower from her group passed away, she really was, but she was more worried about Megamind and Minion.
"And I heard Doris tried to steal his pills, so she's getting dehydrated," Agnes said.
"Oh. Oh?" Better than getting kicked out, Roxanne supposed, but... "She's really getting dehydrated?"
"Oh, not for stealing. At least..." Agnes's brow furrowed. "I don't think it's for stealing. I think it's so she doesn't croak."
Roxanne stopped and stared at the bullet-riddled hovercraft in the mechanic's bay, then hurried into the Lair to find Megamind. "But they're all right, aren't they?"
"Yeah, I guess so. They're not back yet," Pilar said.
"Not back yet? Where'd they go? I thought you went with him."
"I just went with the search parties, you know? After that giant zombie came out of the lake and almost got you and Billy. Then there was that emergency call from Minion, and the Overlord took off with about a million brainbots. That's all I know."
Roxanne ran her hand through her hair. Her scalp itched. It still felt like there might be zombie in it. She should wash her hair again but felt too agitated to bother with it just then.
She dumped her suitcases in their room, and sat on the edge of the bed, cradling her sore arm. The bite marks stung, and her elbow and shoulder ached. She could call him, but she didn't want to be a worrywart. He was probably rescuing more people, that must be it. Yeah, he must be busy, and she wasn't going to take over the comm demanding to know where he was and when he'd be back.
She went out to the courtyard to pace. Something under one of the wall lights caught her eye and she made her way over to it. An off-white ten-foot long banner had been strung up with rope, with colorful markers on strings along the bottom of it. It was half covered with names and messages, and some prayers. Bouquets of dandelions, purple thistles, and other weedy flowers lay at the base of the wall.
'RIP' featured prominently, but there were more personal messages as well. 'Wall of the Dead' had been written across the top, though 'the Dead' had been crossed out and 'Memories' written underneath it. That had also been crossed out, and 'the Dead' written underneath that. Roxanne decided she'd come back tomorrow to see if the 'Memories' person would keep up the war of words.
She ran her fingers along the strings. She'd brought back photos of her parents from the apartment, but hadn't put them on the 'Have You Seen Me' banner in the Lair yet. Someday she might have to put their names on this banner, whatever the duelling labelers decided it would be called.
Roxanne whirled at the sound of tires on gravel. Two electric cars came through the gate, which was still open despite the lateness of the hour, and parked to one side. Of the several people who got out, armed for zombies, three were Bernard, the doctor, and the pastor.
She wondered where they'd been, and began to walk across the yard to talk to them. Maybe she should get her own minion to keep her informed, so she'd know what the hell was going on.
"Excuse me, dear." A little old lady in a wheelchair pushing herself along with her feet came into her path. "Excuse me," she said again with a smile. "Have you seen Mad Dog?"
"Uh...Mad Dog?" Roxanne said.
"Mad Dog Munster. He usually helps me find the bathroom. He was in prison, you know. He has a tattoo of a skull with a snake crawling through it. Right on his chest."
"Really. I didn't know that," Roxanne said weakly. She looked around for her quarry, but Bernard and the others were disappearing into the Lair. "I'll help you find him."
"Oh, thank you, dear."
Roxanne wheeled her inside. Once she got the wheelchair moving, she found she could push it mostly with her undamaged arm.
Doris's shrill voice cut through the din. "You may be the Overlord's uncle, Mr. Bauerman, but you have to wait your turn for the laundry like everyone else!"
The old woman turned to give Roxanne a look of utmost horror. "Oh no, is that..." Her voice fell to a whisper. "Doris Haggerty?"
"Yes, but don't worry. She's getting dehydrated in the morning."
The old woman crossed herself vigorously. "Thank God."
After locating Mad Dog, who did indeed have a very impressive tattoo, she decided she'd waited long enough for Megamind, and headed for the monitors to call him. But once again she was distracted, this time by the sight of Bernard curled up under his desk.
"Tough day?"
"Someone took my spot," he murmured. "My blankets. Wasn't a great spot, but it was my spot. Geez. Some people."
Roxanne exhaled and ran a hand through her hair. "Oh. Well, Bernard, did you tell them you were sleeping there?"
"No. What's the point?"
"Look, I'll help you get your spot back, okay? It's probably a misunderstanding. But, I couldn't help noticing you went somewhere." She really wasn't very good at comforting people. Dang it. Her main goal in talking to Bernard was to satisfy her curiosity.
"Only 'cuz he made me," he said sullenly. "I don't see why I have to do all the paperwork around here."
Before she could coax more out of him, there was a riot of noise from the entrance. Several people cheered as Megamind rode in on Spider-bot and Roxanne felt a relieved smile spread over her face.
"Honey, I'm ho-o-o-ome," he shouted. Spider-bot threaded its way through the crowd and around the beds, coming to a stop next to her. Megamind slid down one of its legs and she held out her arms. Slipping his hands around her waist, he planted a quick kiss on her lips, and then she caught a whiff of alcohol on his breath.
More denizens cheered. From the back someone let out a wolf howl. Megamind pulled her closer and kissed her again, longer and more firmly. Roxanne would have enjoyed it more, except that his entire body vibrated with tension like a guitar string wound too tightly. "Everything okay?" she said, when they stopped for breath.
"Never better. A question for you, my darling," he said with a strange, bright smile. "Did you order Tony to go to your apartment with you?"
"No, he kind of just came along."
"Good, good. Good to know." He released her and bellowed, "Tony!"
Tony edged through the crowd while Megamind clicked through the de-gun settings. Megamind snapped his fingers at Bernard, who had crawled out to see the commotion. "Bring me a chair."
Bernard brought over a desk chair.
"Sit," Megamind said.
Nervously, Tony reached for the armrests and lowered his seat into the chair.
Megamind fired. Tony flinched as two glowing blobs hit his arms. When the glow faded, he was stuck to the armrests by glue.
"The next time I give you a direct order, I expect to be obeyed, henchman," Megamind said. "You'll sit there until your damn leg either heals or falls off, whichever comes first."
He spun on his heel and marched over to Doris. Grinning, Megamind whipped a cube out of his inner pocket and held it up in front of her face. "This, my dear Mrs. Haggerty, is a sniper, a foul murderer. He will be the first victim of my alligators, to be fed to them at the very next feeding. What do you have to say about that?"
Doris's eyes narrowed. "Alive?" she said.
"Quite dead. In pieces, actually. Minion won't even need the bone saw. Here." He tossed the cube at Minion. People reared back as it soared overhead into Minion's hands. "Take care of that, will you?
His manic grin turned to her again. "Miss Ritchi, I have some excellent footage for you, all about my glorious encounter with our friends in the military." With a sweep of his cape he strode toward the editing area.
Roxanne's breath froze in her lungs. As so often when she got frightened, she also got angry. Lunging forward she grabbed his elbow, spinning him around, and at last his ferocious smile wavered. He stared at her wide-eyed and startled.
She shouted, "You confronted them now? What the hell were you thinking?"
