Hey there, it's me again! :) My life is busy right now, but I still love writing this, so here's another chapter. Hope you're all doing well out there. Thanks again for reading anc reviewing my crap, is much appreciated! :)
"This is nice.", Neal said and sat down on the brown scuffed sofa.
Peter looked around in the simple furnished, plain looking room. "You think so?"
Neal laughed dryly. "Well, no. But it will do."
Peter nodded. "There's a room upstairs ready for you if you want to rest for a while."
Neal leaned back, sighed and shook his head. "No, I'd rather get right to it."
Peter nodded again. He prepared a quick lunch for both of them. Neal wrinkled his nose at the sight of the sandwiches.
"Thank you, but I'm not hungry.", he said and pushed the plate away.
"You'll eat that. We don't start before you've got something in your stomach."
Neal sighed again, then reluctantly started eating. When they both finished, Peter led Neal to a table in the back of the room.
They sat down opposite to each other. Neal stared at the tabletop in front of him. Peter placed a microphone in front of both of them and started recording.
"This is Agent Peter Burke, I'm here today with Neal George Caffrey to talk about the crimes related to Matthew Keller. Do you want me to read out your rights?"
Neal shook his head. "No, I know them.", he replied, without looking Peter in the eyes.
"Right, but you know that you have the right to consult a lawyer and you don't have to say anything to incriminate yourself?"
Neal nodded. "Yes, I know. I don't want a lawyer."
Peter took a deep breath. "All right. Let's start with how you met Matthew Keller for the first time."
Neal began to talk, a blank and tired look in his eyes. He repeated the things which he had already said to Peter but left out many details from his past life. Peter didn't push him any further.
"What were these former operations like you were part of?"
Neal shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "I am exercising my right to refuse to testify at this point. But I'm willing to talk about the latest heist.", he said calmly.
Peter nodded. "We will come back to this topic later. So…tell me more about breaking into the MET."
And Neal began to explain, in all its particulars, how they did it, what his part was, who went with them (without mentioning Mozzie) and what they wanted to steal. His voice sounded monotonous and indifferent.
"When it all went wrong, Keller sent me to steal the painting from … you. That's why I turned myself in.", he finished his monologue.
He still refused to face Peter. "How did you manage to reach the basement and get rid of the anklet?", he asked.
"You already know that.", Neal replied annoyed.
"Yes, but I want to hear it in your words."
Neals sighed again, then went on talking. "It wasn't the agent's fault, by the way. He was Keller's victim."
Peter cleared his throat. "Just like you."
Neal shook his head. "No, I decided to take part in his heist. I knew that it wouldn't do me any good, but I decided to take the risk. So, I'm fully responsible.", he answered in a firm voice. Peter left it at that.
"What happened when you went back to hand over the painting?"
"I had to help him decoding the coordinates on the back."
"What did he have on you? Why did you go back to him?"
Neal fully met his eyes for the first time. He slowly shook his head regretfully. "I can't tell you, Peter. I'm sorry. I had my reasons."
Peter tapped his fingers on the tabletop. "Why not?"
"I just can't." Neal looked exhausted now.
"Shall we take a break?"
Neal simply shook his head.
"Suspect shook his head.", Peter said to officially record the motion.
The kid just continued staring expectantly at him with his tired looking bright blue eyes.
"What was Keller like when you had to stay with him?", Peter asked cautiously.
Neal frowned. "That's irrelevant.", he replied calmly.
Peter simply waited.
"Come on Peter, you just want to arrest him. It doesn't matter how he treated me.", Neal had trouble to hide his annoyance, rising panic and anger again.
The agent still didn't answer. He knew that he definitely crossed a boundary right now but couldn't change it.
Neal groaned. "I told you these things in private, Peter. I won't repeat them here.", he insisted.
Peter sighed. "What he did to you is a crime, too, Neal. It could help keeping him getting locked up for a long time."
The kid lowered his glance again, his hands clenched into fists.
"He locked me in a cell, chained me to the wall, beat me up and I didn't get anything to eat. Satisfied?", he fired back, then shook his head and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. Just go on with another question…please.", he added, now quietly, regaining his composure.
Peter cleared his voice and said: "I'll close today's questioning at 6:15 p.m." He reached out to turn off the microphones.
Neal frantically shook his head, his eyes wide now. "No, Peter. I'm sorry for the outburst! I don't want to stop. I want him behind bars!". Peter raised his hands to sooth him.
"Calm down kid. It's enough for today. Not because of your outburst. I can see that you are drained and I won't treat you like he did."
Neal snorted. "I'm not made of sugar, Peter. And I know you would never even begin to treat me like he did. Just go on, please!"
Peter shook his head again. "No discussion, kiddo. How about a pizza and a movie?"
Neal looked at him, breathing heavily. "Thanks, but no. I'd rather retire to my room, if possible."
Peter hesitated, then nodded. "But you have to eat something!"
Neal stood up shakily and shrugged. "Maybe later.", he responded and without another glance fled from the room.
Peter gave him two hours to calm down, then took two pieces of pizza on a plate and went upstairs.
He felt somehow nervous, he wasn't sure what to expect when ge knocked on Neal's bedroom door.
"Come in!", the kid responded quickly.
Peter opened the door and found Neal sitting on his bed, a notepad and a pencil in front of him. When Peter went inside, Neal hurried to inconspicuously slide it under a pillow next to him.
The agent handed Neal the plate, who snidely wrinkled his nose.
Peter laughed. "You're definitely not an ordinary teenager. What's wrong with pizza?", he asked, still chuckling.
Neal smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Nothing. Thank you! I'm just not hungry.", he admitted and placed the plate next to him.
Peter hesitated, then pointed at the bed. "May I sit down?", he asked.
Neal nodded. Peter took a seat, leaving a proper distance.
"You have to eat, Neal. You need to get your strength back."
Neal laughed out loud. "Now you sound like a proper dad.", he blurted out, then suddenly went serious again and lowered his gaze. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…", he began.
Peter interrupted him. "It's all right. It's what you need right now, someone who takes over the responsible for your wellbeing."
Neal shook his head. "I already told you. I'm not a little boy anymore and even back then I could take care of myself. I definitely don't need another father figure. One dad was more than enough. And… you know, I don't like switching between these two roles. You can't be my friend… or whatever and the one who's in charge of my crimes at the same time. It doesn't work for me. I know you didn't mean to and I know that it isn't easy for you as well, but as you could see when you questioned me, things overlap. It's… it's just not working for me. Sorry, I really don't know what's wrong with me. It's just so NOT me to talk about such things, emotional stuff. I'm not weak and I don't want to be pitied.", he took a deep breath and leaned his head back.
Peter remained quiet for a few seconds, just watched the boy's movements. "Do you want another interrogator? Would that be easier?", he asked calmly.
Neal stared at him in disbelief. "You would hand this over?", he replied, laughing out dryly.
"I wouldn't like it. But I would do it if you thought that would work better.", Peter admitted.
Their eyes met.
Neal shook his head. "I don't think that's the problem. It's… the other part you're playing."
Peter observed him, still perfectly calm. "Is that what you think it is? Me playing with you?"
Neal lowered his gaze. "No.", he admitted hesitantly. "But sometimes … I'm just not so sure. I depend on your honesty right now and… sometimes I'm… I'm scared… I don't like someone else having power over me. Not after… And I … I still can't size you up. Is this … off records right now? I mean… for sure?", he asked, watching him wearily.
Peter nodded immediately. "I solemnly promise.", he simply stated.
Neal nodded. It took him another few seconds to go on talking.
"It's just… I know I caused a lot of trouble. For the FBI, for you, your wife …. I dominated your working life for such a long time. And I want to fix that. But on the other hand, I … I just want to run and leave all this mess behind. Keller, my dad, my crimes and … you. Running und conning is the only thing that helped in my past. It's just… too much, too close, too dangerous. And I'm… I'm afraid of going back to juvie… and I know I will have to, for a long time probably. It would just be so easy to start all over somewhere else. For all of us.", he took a deep breath, watched Peter, his eyes full of his desire, he then backed away a little and raised his hands, as if he then realized what he just said. "It's not what I'm going to do Peter, I promise. Honestly. I won't run, not anymore. Not right now, at least."
Peter smiled. "It's all right, kiddo. I know. You can't fight your feelings. And of course it's a lot to swallow right now. It's a pattern you had to internalize. But I'll show you another way out of this mess. And I promise I'll do my best to let you off as easy as possible. And whatever will happen, you won't ever be imprisoned under such circumstances again. Not as long as I have something to say.", he smiled warmly.
Neal smiled back, half-heartedly. "You shouldn't say these things. I know you just want to help. But you have to think about yourself, about your career. I will never be someone you want to be associated with. Not after you put me behind bars. I will never be able to change completely. It's a part of me."
Peter remained quiet for a few seconds. "What does this suppose to mean? Do you really want to live this kind of life forever? Hunted by the authorities, hunted by me, for the rest of your life? Always surrounded by people who are not good for you? Just for what… the thrill? The challenge? You could use your talent, your passion, so much better. You're still so young. And do you really think you'd be doing me any good? Picking up where you left off?", his voice had taken on a sharp undertone.
Neal shook his head, his gaze lowered. "I wish you had never found me, I had never appeared on your radar. I feel trapped.", he replied bitterly.
Peter groaned and pounded his fist on the bed in front of him.
Neal flinched and backed away. The agent could see tears glittering in his eyes.
"I know you try to push me back with all your might. But that won't work! It doesn't matter how many times I have to repeat myself. Your choices are limited right know and I'm sorry kiddo, but in this case I'll force you to be happy if I have to."
Neal blinked rapidly, his expression full of desperation and rage. "Would you please leave the room? Do I have the freedom to ask for that, Agent Burke?", he fired back, breathing heavily.
Peter watched him closely, then stood up. "Of course. But please Neal, no hasty actions."
Neal hesitated, then pulled up his pants, showing the anklet. He looked at Peter, defiantly, without saying another word.
Peter nodded. "I know. And I know you want to do what's right. But I also know that you're scared. And exhausted. It's not the time for any decisions. Please, just calm down. We'll talk tomorrow."
Peter waited. Neal indicated a small nod, then turned his head and Peter sighed heavily. He left the room and closed the door silently.
Peter went back into the bare and not very homely living room and phoned his team.
"Nothing new. Keller seems to have vanished into thin air, but we are on it. Everything seems to be very quiet out there right now! Elizabeth will be safe soon, she's almost on her way and we will position two teams in front of the safe house all night. How did the questioning go?", Jones asked.
Peter hesitated, then reluctantly provided an overview of the findings to date. "It's difficult. As you can imagine, Neal's not really an open book, but he tries his best to be honest and helpful. Maybe … maybe I'll need you or Diana here tomorrow to take over, even if I would rather avoid it.", he paused for a second. "I suppose I got a bit too close to him. I lack the necessary distance. But at the same time, I doubt that he will let anyone else get as close to him as I am right now. His definition of proximity… Even though I don't doubt your ability. I just want to protect him, help him out of this.", he replied lost in thoughts.
"Well, I see what you mean, boss. But maybe it's worth a try, don't you think? You certainly don't want anyone to doubt your objectivity either."
Peter smiled bitterly. Exactly what Neal had warned him about, too. A danger to his own career.
He rubbed his temples. "Let's see tomorrow."
He thanked his agent and hung up. Definitely time for bed. After a quick call to make sure his wife was all right, he headed upstaires, feeling absolutely drained.
In the middle of the night, Peter startled from sleep. He knew immediately that something was wrong.
There! A noise in the hallway, silent steps.
Neal? No, definitely not.
He jumped out of bed, fumbled in the dark for his gun on his nightstand. Suddenly a bright light flared up.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Agent Burke.", a deep voice said.
Peter froze, turned slowly around, adrenaline flooding his body. His eyes needed some time to adjust to the brightness.
Where were the guards? He could see the shade of a tall man in the doorway.
His gaze fell on the gun, which was pointed at him. He raised his hands a little, without averting the gaze.
"Relax, I'll do what you say! Just don't do something stupid, I am a…", Peter said as calmly as he could.
"A federal agent, I know, Agent Burke. Won't help you, I'm afraid.", the man replied.
Peter thought he could hear a trace of honest regret in his voice. The man crossed the room, the gun pointed steadfastly at him. He reached the nightstand, grabbed the agent's weapon and put it in the waistband of his pants.
Peter didn't move. He could see bruises in the dark dressed man's face.
"What do you want?", the agent asked, hiding any fear.
"I think you can guess! Now sit down, back against the radiator.", the man ordered.
Before Peter could do anything, Neal appeared in the doorway, wearing a huge sleepshirt and pyjama pants.
"Hello, David.", he said resignedly, addressing the man. "I'd like to say good to see you, but that wouldn't be true."
The man called David reached back and grabbed the boy's arm, pushed him violently on the bed.
"I told you to run, stupid kid!", he groaned through clenched teeth.
"Don't move!", he added. "And you, I said sit down, back against the radiator.", he repeated.
Peter hesitated for a split second, whereupon the man hit his forehead hard with the handle of his gun. The agent staggered backwards, sliding down the wall. Warm blood ran down his forehead. He could hear Neal screaming, who tried to reach Peter, but was pushed back by David.
"Calm down. I don't want to hurt you too, not right now.", he said harshly in the kid's direction and took some cable ties and tied Peter to the heating pipe.
"It's all right, Neal, just do what he says.", Peter managed to say in a washed-out voice. The plastic constricted his wrists and he saw stars.
David turned around, grabbed Neals shirt and pulled him in a standing position. Their faces were just inches away.
"Why didn't you just run with your weird friend? Why? I went through hell to save your live. I really liked you, I did. But now you're the reason why I have to kill a fuckin fed.", his expression seemed distorted, he had beads of sweat on his forehead.
Neal tried to free himself. "No, you won't.", he said in a clenched voice. "No, David. It's not necessary. Just let him here like that. I'll come with you without fighting back, I promise. It's not worth killing a fed. Please! I know you. You're not a murderer!", Neal couldn't hide the panic in his voice.
David stared at him. "You know nothing about me, kid. I have no choice. I told you, he's not someone you want to mess around with. Come on, I'll lock you in your room till it's over.", he tried to drag Neal out of the room, who struggled and freed himself. He jumped forward, turned, around and crossed the room by climbing over the bed before David could even reach out to hold him back.
He stood protectively in front of Peter, who slowly got a grip on himself again.
"If you want to shoot him, you have to shoot me first.", he said in a firm voice.
David groaned. "You know what? I'd like to after all that happened. But Keller wants you alive. He still needs you."
Neal visibly tensed. "Well, I won't do anything for that bloody bastard if you touch another hair on Peter's head.", he said, his hands clenched into fists.
"You're on a first-name base, eh? So Keller was right. This fed will be a problem as long as he is still alive."
David grabbed Neal's collar, pushed him back and pressed him hard against the wall. He rammed his knee into his stomach, so that Neal couldn't breathe.
"I didn't choose this, Neal, I can tell you that, just like you. But it's time to follow the rules now. There's no escape. Not for me, not for you."
Peter managed to sit upright. "Leave…him alone.", he managed to say.
Neal turned to face him and started fighting again. David rammed his head hard against the wall, while Neal desperately continued kicking as hard as he could.
"Stop that …. Listen Neal, stop it.", Peter implored him.
Neal slowly became limp, focused on David's face.
"What did he do to you?", he managed to ask.
David watched him, breathing heavily. "You know what he does when he isn't satisfied.", he simply replied.
"You're not this kind of person, David. You're better than that.", Neal calmly said.
"I once was a better person, who made bad decisions. Now it no longer concerns me alone. It doesn't matter what happens to me, but…", he almost whispered at the end.
"Who is it?", Neal held his gaze, looked at him seriously.
David hesitated. "My wife and my … my little one.", he admitted reluctantly.
Neal snorted and looked sideways, still pressed against the wall by David. "You know, he won't leave you or them alone, even if you … if you do this.", their eyes met again.
"I know, but I have to try."
Peter watched them closely, without interfering. He could hear the desperation in the man's voice.
"Just leave him here and tell Keller he's dead.", Neal begged, but David shook his head.
"You know that wouldn't work.", he said, regretfully. The kid closed his eyes, took another deep breath.
"Let me talk to Keller."
David shook his head again.
"Please, David.", he fixed him piercingly. "I know you don't want to do this, either."
David ran his hand free hand over his face and groaned again. He pulled out a cell phone, pushed a button and rammed it against Neal's chest. Neal took it and waited.
"Is it done?", a cold voice answered.
"Keller.", Neal said as steadily as possible.
"Ah, the con-man himself. You thought you could get away with anything? You will pay for all the trouble, I promise you!"
"You still need me.", Neal simply replied, without responding to what has been said.
"Unfortunately, yes, I do. I need someone with your skills who is expendable afterwards, you know?", Keller answered, chuckling.
Neal stayed calm. "I'll do whatever you want. Without hesitation. But not if you kill Agent Burke.", he avoided looking at Peter. "You can do whatever you want with me, and I'll do everything I can to help you, but leave him here and let him live. Otherwise, you can tell David to kill me, too. Because I won't lift a finger, no matter what you do to me."
Silence.
Neal waited and felt Peter's gaze on him. The responsibility for all that had happened almost overwhelmed him, but he tried to keep cool. After what felt like an eternity, Keller responded.
"Put David on the phone.", he ordered. Neal obeyed reluctantly, threw a quick sideway glance towards Peter, whose eye began to swell under all the blood.
"Yes boss?", David said. "Got it. Will do. See you later."
He cut the call and stared at Neal, who held his breath.
David turned Neal around, grabbed his arms and also tied him up with a cable tie, then he pushed him back onto the bed.
He then pulled out a knive and approached Peter.
"David! Please, no!", Neal yelled and tried to stand up. "Come on, David. That's just not you!".
"I could help you out of this. Let's just talk about it!", Peter tried to stop the man in front of him lamely in a husky voice.
David didn't react but approached him further.
"Please, not in front of the boy.", Peter begged.
David knelt down, stretched out his hand with the knife and looked at Peter coolly.
He then took out his gun with one hand and cut the shackles with the other in one fluid motion.
"Stand up, fed.", he ordered, waving the weapon.
Peter obeyed, absolutely bewildered. His heart was beating up to his neck now. He caught a glimpse of Neal, who looked utterly pale, his eyes wide. "Turn around!", David waited for Peter to react, then pushed him hard against the wall like he did with Neal before, searched Peter, then tied his hands behind his back.
He then helped Neal up.
"Let's go, you're coming with me.", he announced and shoved the gun into Neal's back, who stumbled against Peter. "You'll both be Keller's guests."
