You guys are the bees knees! I'm shooting for another 11 reviews because that's how many I got on chapter 6 and I was very pleased! Much love.
I'm sorry it has taken this long to update. Been pretty busy with assignments and work!


Jax and Tara stared at each other for what seemed like a long time to both of them before she felt tears prick her eyes. Tonight has been super stressful and she can't believe she actually has blood on her hands - she took a life. Of course it was not on purpose and Kohn wasn't the best of people, but it was still a human life. How can she ever move on and forgive herself for something like this?

Tara brings her hands up to cover her face and hide her shame and embarrassment as she begins to cry. Realizing how ridiculous she must look - breaking down into tears completely naked while she was initially trying to be sexy - only makes her cry more.
Jax walks towards her and grabs her robe from the floor. He gently pulls her hands down, revealing sad emerald eyes and tear-stained cheeks. He holds the robe out for her to slip her arms into and she secures it around her waist.

Without saying anything Tara wraps her arms around Jax, hoping she will feel his strong embrace. He returns the hug and rubs her back over the silky material of the robe as she cries into his neck. "It's going to be okay Tara. Not right now, not tomorrow, probably not even next month - but someday it will be. I promise." Tara nods into this neck that is now wet with tears.
"I'm sorry I'm such a mess.. thanks again for everything. I don't think I can get through this without you." She says pulling away.
Jax wipes the tears from her face. "Yeah, well, you don't have to."

Tara finally flashes him a pretty smile. "Thanks. I want to ask you something... it'll probably sound absurd right now, but-"
"Ask me." He insists. Tara flushes. "Can we go for a ride on your bike?"


Jax and Tara arrive at Clay and Gemma's which is very dark - it looks as if everyone is in bed. "Come in, I have to take a leak." Tara grins at him before following him through the garage and into the house she spent most of her nights at when she was 16-19 years old. "Just like I remember it." She observes and Jax grins at her but his smile doesn't meet his eyes.

Jax disappears and leaves Tara standing in a dark kitchen. She walks over to the fridge and looks at the pictures hanging on it with a big smile plastered on her face. One of Sydney as a little girl holding what appears to be her first lost tooth. Jax and Opie on what Tara assumes is Jax's 21st birthday. Thomas Teller held by John Teller. Sydney on Jax's shoulders dressed as Snow White. A candid photo of Jax handing Sydney flowers at what looks like ballet or some kind of dance recital. Sydney and Gemma at Teller-Morrow. Clay and Gemma at the Club House.

Tara's thoughts are interrupted by Jax's voice floating from another room in the dark house. "I didn't know you were up. You okay? You don't look so good, babe."
Sydney is the one to reply. "Yeah, I'm okay. My head is just pounding. I'm going to take something." Sydney enters the kitchen followed by Jax and jumps when she sees Tara. Tara apologizes while grinning. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, honey."
Sydney smiles. "So what are you guys up to?" She asks curiously as she grabs a bottle of water from the fridge. Jax opens one of the cupboards and pulls out some pain relievers and hands two to Sydney. "We're going on a ride." Jax replies.

Sydney looks straight at Tara and can't keep the smile off her face. Tara remembers admitting that she used to love riding with Jax and flushes crimson but smiles back. "What am I missing?" Jax asks.
"Nothing, daddy." Sydney swallows the pills. "Ugh.. this sucks so bad!" She complains while rubbing her temples. Jax frowns and tucks her wavy curls behind her ear to get them out of her face. "Why does it hurt?" Sydney just shrugs. "I'm not sure."

Jax pulls her in for a loving hug. "I hope you feel better. I should be home in a little while but I hope you'll be asleep by then? Sweet dreams, angel." He says kissing her head. Tara smiles at how adorable Jax is when it comes to his little girl. "Thanks, dad. Goodnight."
"Bye, Sydney. I hope your headache goes away so you can get some sleep. Goodnight!"

"Thanks, Tara! I hope it does too. Have a nice ride!" She says with a playful smile.
Jax and Tara leave through the door that is connected to the garage. Jax hands Tara Sydney's helmet as he swings his leg over and sits on his bike. She removes some of the padding in the helmet so it fits better before getting on and wrapping her arms around him. "Ready?"
"Can't wait!" She says with glee. Jax starts the bike and they ride out into the street and head to the outskirts of town.

Tara enjoys the cool wind against her body as they ride through the mountainous land. Jax speeds up once they get further from town and Tara giggles as she tightens her grip around him. She never realized how much she missed this: riding on the back of Jax's bike and forgetting everything for a little while. Riding with Jax was always so calming to her.

"Come on, Tara. We've been together for almost two years now. Don't you trust me? I wouldn't let you get on the back of my bike if I wasn't sure of myself. It'll be fun. We'll stay in town so we can go slow." Jax tries to convince her as he reaches for Tara's waist and rests his hands there after pulling her close. He lightly presses a kiss on her forehead.

Jackson Teller had just turned "the big 18" yesterday and received his very own motorcycle. He of course had ridden a motorcycle before because he had to learn so he could get his license, but having his own bike is a big deal and he really wants to share the experience with his wonderful girlfriend.

"It's not that I don't trust you, babe.. I'm just scared." She admits sheepishly. Jax grins. "That's what you said about a lot of things.. besides, you love riding." He says wiggling his eyebrows suggestively and earning a gasp and smack on the upper arm from Tara. "This is a motorcycle though... This is different."
Jax grabs an extra helmet that is sitting around in Teller-Morrow. "Please?"
Tara adverts her eyes away from his adorable face. "Stop that.." She commands. Jax smirks, knowing he's getting to her. "Stop what?" Tara can't help but laugh. "You know damn well what you are doing, Jackson Nathaniel. Don't look at me like that."

It didn't take much longer for Jax to get Tara to agree to "just one ride." Tara was shaking and holding onto Jax so tightly at first, but she finally loosened up and told herself to try to enjoy it. After all, this is what Jax loves to do and is a big part of his life and family.
They ride around town and end up back at Teller-Morrow twenty minutes later. Jax comes to a stop and waits for Tara to hop off but she doesn't. "Tara?" He asks. Her response is a request: "Let's go again!"

Jax and Tara ride about a half hour away from Charming and are just now turning around. Tara's been trying to avoid the fact that she is truly enjoying being pressed up against him. She can no longer deny the way he makes her feel even after all this time.
About another half hour later they are pulling into Tara's driveway. She hops off the bike and takes off the helmet and hands it to him but he gets off the bike too. "I can walk you in."

Tara's stomach drops at the thought of sleeping alone in her house tonight. She couldn't be happier that this is only a temporary home that her job's benefits help pay for until she finds a home she wants to live in. She isn't sure she could ever live here happily after what happened tonight.
She unlocks the door and they enter, Jax closing the door behind them. "Thanks a lot for letting me ride with you. It helped relax me somewhat."
Jax flashes her a sexy half smile. "Anytime, Doc.. I mean that." Tara grins and says the next thing that pops into her head. "I hope Sydney's headache went away and that you don't wake her when you get home." Jax chuckles. "I hope I don't either. That's when her horns come out."
Tara giggles. "Sounds like someone else I know." She mocks.

Jax raises his eyebrows with a smile. "Funny. Well, I meant what I said.. let me know when you want to go for another ride, okay?" Tara nods. "Thanks. Goodnight, Jax."


The only thing Jax can think about on his ride home was how badly he wanted to kiss her goodnight. He knows she was too vulnerable though considering what she just went through. He doesn't want her to kiss him unless she actually wants to.

It's already well past 1AM as Jax pulls his bike into the garage and presses a button to close the door. He quietly enters the house, kicks off his shoes and heads straight to the bathroom to pee and brush his teeth. He exits the bathroom shirtless but still in his jeans with his white t-shirt, hoodie, and kutte drapped over his forearm.
Upon entering his old bedroom, he sees that Sydney isn't in bed. He quickly trades his jeans in for a pair of sweats before checking the living room.
Sure enough, Sydney is sprawled out on the couch. Jax stares at the beauty as he contemplates whether or not he should move her. She stirs and Jax holds his breath, hoping he hasn't disturbed her. She stretches and rolls over but opens her eyes. "Hey, dad."

Jax sighs. "Did I wake you?" Sydney shakes her head. "No, I don't think so.. how was the ride?" Jax looks at her quizzically before responding. "It was fine... how's the head?" She grins mockingly. "It's fine..."
Jax chuckles before leaving the living room and going to the dining room to grab his cigarettes. He sits down and thinks about how long the day has been as he smokes. He hopes that Tara can deal with possibly being questioned about Kohn going missing when the time comes. There's no way it will just go unnoticed.

Jax stands, stretching and yawning as he enters the living room. Sydney is already fast asleep again so he gently lifts her and puts her on the opposite side of the queen sized bed before crawling under the covers and passing out instantly.


Tara tossed and turned all night and it is now 11AM. She finally decides to get out of bed after laying awake for a long time. She puts the clothes she forgot about in the washer into the dryer before heading to the kitchen to have some coffee when her phone starts ringing. "Hello?"
"Hey, Tara! You're not at work, are you?" Donna asks eagerly. Tara grins. "No, why?"
"Want to do something? I want to talk to you.. we weren't really able to at the carnival. It's been so long, y'know? I've missed you, Tare-Bear." Tara grins before giggling. "I've missed you as well Donny."
"Great! Meet me at The Coffee Bean at noon?"
"It's a date." Tara says before saying goodbye and hanging up.

Tara tries not to think about Kohn as she enters her bathroom to brush through her hair and straighten it. She washes and moisturizes her face before applying a light foundation and deciding to just wear mascara on her eyes. She thinks about eating before brushing her teeth but is sure she doesn't have an appetite at the moment.
She bends down to pick up the bags of clothes she abandoned last night and picks one of her new tank tops and the skinny jeans Sydney talked her into buying. She dresses and admires herself in the mirror - something she doesn't do often. She turns to look at her bottom and finds that she actually likes the way the jeans hug her just right. She smiles, finally feeling confident for the first time in a very long time.


Sydney woke up around 7:30 and felt wide awake so she got out of bed as quietly as she could manage so she wouldn't wake her father. He didn't end up getting out of bed until 10AM which is weird for him since he is an early riser - late to bed and early to rise is how he's been for a very long time now.

Jax showered and left for the Clubhouse around 11 after kissing Sydney goodbye. Clay is gone too so it's just Gemma and Sydney.
"Did you hear your dad come in last night?" Gemma asks her while slipping on her leather jacket. Sydney nods. "Yes, kind of. I didn't hear him but I woke up after her got here." Gemma pushes for more information. "How was he? Did he seem weird or anything?" Sydney shakes her head. "No, he seemed fine, gram."

"Alright, good. I just don't know what to think..." Sydney nods but wonders what exactly her grandmother means. She was hoping that Gemma was starting to give Tara a break but now she's not so sure. "Do you really not like her that much?" Gemma sighs, knowing she has some explaining to do. "Sydney, I don't think it's that I don't like her.. I've moved on from that at least. She left your father a heartbroken mess when she took off for Chicago. I had no idea what to do.. he wouldn't eat, wouldn't sleep, wouldn't even hook up with girls for a while... all he wanted to do was sulk in his bedroom and there was nothing I could do to make it better. That's what sucked the most; not being able to help my baby."

Sydney bites her lip, feeling sorry for her father as well as Gemma. "How long was he like that? That bad, I mean." Gemma thinks. "A while. Even after you were born. But he eventually pulled his head out of his ass and saw that he had someone else other than himself to worry about. You got him through all that shit, baby. I have no idea what he would be like today if he wouldn't have slept with that tart and got her pregnant." Sydney smiles and throws her arms around Gemma who gladly returns the hug. "I love you, grandma." "I love you too, Sydney."


Tara spots Donna as she enters The Coffee Bean and grins, happy to see her friend. "Hey! You're looking good today!" Donna says looking Tara over. "New clothes?" Tara nods, thanking her. "Yes, finally! So how have you been?" She asks pulling a chair out and sitting down. "I've been okay.. stressed about Opie's involvement in the club though. He just got out of prison after five years and I won't be able to handle him going back.. he has kids to raise." Donna says sadly. Tara reaches for her hand across the table. "I'm sorry, Donna.. I know it must be really hard for you.. I can't even imagine having a family while trying to be strong through everything.. you're an amazing woman and Opie is so very lucky to have you!" Donna squeezes back. "Thanks, Tara.. sometimes it just really seems like the kids and I come second though.. he says he's doing it for us though.. being in the club and working in the shop, I mean." Tara nods. "Opie has loved you since you guys were kids and still does. Trust me. You're the love and light of his life, honey."

Donna and Tara eventually change the subject while getting in line to place an order. "So how have things been for you since you returned? Do you like your job?" Tara nods excitedly. "I love my job! I was super nervous about coming back but it was my best option. Plus, I wouldn't have been the one to help Abel if I hadn't returned." Donna pays the cashier for her coffee. "How is the little guy doing anyway?" Tara looks over the menu and orders before responding. "He's doing great. I was definitely nervous about him the first few weeks. Not exactly the type of family you want to let down, y'know?" Tara asks, a hint of smirk on her face. Donna giggles. "Definitely not.. so you and Jax? What's going on with that?"

Tara and Donna return to their table with their drinks. "We've decided to be civil.. the last thing I want to do is be on bad terms. I enjoy being one of Abel's doctors and do not want anything to be awkward." Donna narrows her eyes at her. "That's it? I know better than that, Knowles.." Tara's eyes widen and Donna giggles. "C'mon, nothing? No you-left-me-but-I'm-still-madly-in-love-with-you or I-can't-resist-because-you're-so-goddamn-sexy sex?" She asks with a suggestive smile. Tara gasps and throws her crumpled up receipt at Donna making them both laugh. "You think I can't resist him?" Tara asks. Donna takes a sip of her coffee to keep from laughing again. "Well, not many women can.. even the taken ones. Jax has been with a lot of women but he is choosy."


Jax sits at the bar in the Clubhouse smoking a cigarette after Church. They discussed the fact that the One-Niners are going to be pissed about the Sons decided to deal weapons to the Mayans but it's a risk they know they need to take. This life is the one Jax has known his entire life but he often thinks about what things would be like if he would have taken a different path. Like graduating high school and denying the club life. He didn't do that though; he feels as if he wouldn't fit in somewhere else.

Clay walks up next to him. "What's going on with you? Your head isn't where it should be.. we have a lot coming up that needs your full attention and dedication." Jax stubs out his cigarette. "My head is fine, Clay. Don't worry about me. Worry about yourself." He says while hopping off the bar stool and exiting the building. "Prick."


Gemma and Sydney walk past all the shops and businesses on Main Street while talking. "Gemma, Sydney! Hello! How are you girls doing today?" Susie, the owner of a cute clothing and accessories store for woman called Miss Femme, asks. "We're doing great Susie. How are you?" Gemma asks taking off her sunglasses. Gemma isn't always the nicest of people but she adores Susie for some reason. "I'm spectacular! I'm still waiting for this one to be old enough to work for me." She says nodding at Sydney. Sydney's eyes light up. "I can't wait, Susie! I love your store so much!"

Gemma and Sydney continue walking and decide to get a drink at The Coffee Bean. "Hey, look." Sydney says nodding to Tara and Donna. "Go say hi. I'll order for you." Gemma says. Sydney walks over to them and sets a hand on Donna's shoulder. "Hey, honey!" She says pulling Sydney into her side for a hug. "Hey, guys.. how are you?"
"We're good. How are you?" Tara asks with a smile. "I'm alright.. how was the ride? Just like you remembered?" Sydney asks excitedly. Tara blushes and Donna questions them. "Jax took me for a ride last night." She admits shyly. Donna raises her eyebrows. "You failed to mention that... ride on what?" She asks suggestively. Tara's eyes widen as she stifles a laugh and Sydney grimaces. "Donna," She whines, "I'm right here!"

Gemma then walks up to them and greets the two women. "Hey ladies.. mind if I borrow Tara for a minute, Donna?" Donna shakes her head. "Not at all." Tara stands and walks away with Gemma. "Is everything alright? Jax left in hurry last night." Tara nods. "Yes, everything is fine, I promise." Gemma nods. "So... you and Jax? What is this?" Tara looks down. "Nothing, Gemma. We're friends.. we're civil. We don't want any drama. I want to be there for him if he needs help with Abel.. I'm helping an old friend."
Gemma narrows her eyes. "An old friend? Tara, Jax is not 'an old friend.' He's your first love as you are his.. don't give him the wrong impression or lead him on. What's really going on here?" Tara sighs. "I just told you, Gemma.. I'd like to help him if he needs it."

"He has family for that and you know it.. something isn't adding up. You're coming up with excuses to see him and be in his life again because you're still in love with him." Gemma accuses. Tara glares at the woman before her. "Gemma, things are different now and you know it. I jus-" Gemma cuts her off. "You didn't deny it. You're still in love with Jax, Tara. I'm not blind but apparently he is." She says before walking back to Donna and Sydney. Tara bites her lip before following her.


Tara sits at the table in her kitchen drinking tea and going over her and Gemma's conversation in her head. As much as she does not want to admit that Gemma is right, she knows damn well she is. She is afraid to tell Jax because she does not know how he will take it. Of course he still loves her but he could be pissed or upset because, after all, it has been twelve years.

She runs her fingers through her hair before grabbing her phone and calling Jax.
"Hello?" He answers after three rings. "Jax. Hey... look, are you busy? I need to talk to you. It can wait if you have things going on, bu-" He interrupts her. "I'll be there in about a half hour, is that okay?"
Tara nods before realizing he can't see her. "Yes, that's fine. I'll see you then." She hangs up. She sets her phone down and finishes drinking her tea. The minutes go by quickly because of how nervous she is. She just finishes brushing her hair and teeth as she hears a knock on her door. She opens it and steps aside so he can enter. She looks him up and down and feels a tingling sensation in her groin. He's so sexy.

"What's up?" He asks, still standing by her front door. Tara doesn't say a word; she can't help herself. Instead, she closes the space between them with one step and presses her mouth against his. Surprised, he doesn't kiss her back right away, but it doesn't take him long to follow suit. He wraps his arms around her waist and she puts her fingers in his hair.