It's been a little over four months since Tara moved in with Jax and everyone met at Clay and Gemma's. Everyone had such a good time and it isn't until now that some are worried that night may end up being an important part of their memories of everyone gathered together..

Everything is a blur to Sydney as she catches wind of Donna's shooting. She barely has time to even react because SAMCRO calls for a lockdown as she is sitting on her grandparent's couch in shock. "Grandma? Grandma, is she going to be okay?" Sydney asks quietly, almost unable to find her voice. "I don't know, baby. All I know is that we have to get our asses to the club house immediately. We don't know who did this and have no idea whether or not anyone else is in danger. Come on, get up" Gemma commands. She grabs Sydney's hands and pulls her to her feet. "Now, Sydney. We have to go. We will have more information soon."

Gemma and Sydney arrive at the club house and Chibs unlocks the door for them and locks it back up behind them. "Any news? Neither Clay or Jax answered my damn phone call" Gemma says annoyed. "Aye. Well, Unser said there was an eyewitness. He said that a man in mask driving a black SUV pulled up and fired a few shots. Donna must've bent down or somethin' because none of the shots hit her the first time. She floored it but was shot in her attempt to get away. She was shot from the angle of the driver side window since she turned left - two shots grazed her dangerously close to her spine and one grazed her upper arm.. the other went into it. She crashed after being shot and the shooter drove off, the fuckin' bastard. Probably thought he killed her. She had passed out from shock by the time the EMTs got there, but she wasn't dead."

"Jesus Christ, I hope she's going to be okay. And Ope? His kids? Who the fuck did this? This couldn't have been meant for Donna!" Gemma says through gritted teeth.
Chibs sighs. "It definitely wasn't for Donna... it had to've been meant for Opie. A mess and filled with rage, that he is. He's at the hospital with Clay and Jax. Clay said he will call whenever we have any news. His kids are asleep in Opie's room. They don't know yet... Opie rushed here and Happy and I carried them inside - they were barely awake thankfully. We want Opie to be the ones to talk to them."
Gemma nods, knowing it's best that they let them sleep free of worry. "I'm going to go check on them. The poor babies" she says, tears finally pooling in her eyes, as she walks off down the hall.

The shock of the situation starts to fade and Sydney is able to process what happened.. She tries her best not to cry loud - she wants to be strong because everyone needs that from each other right now. Plus, she doesn't want to worry Kenny and Ellie if they happen to wake up before their dad gets here. She prays that Donna will be okay and that her kids will still have a mom and Opie will still have a wife. She can't relate in the way of being afraid to lose her mother, but she still feels for them. She wouldn't know what to do if something like this had happened to Gemma.
Why would anyone want to kill Opie though? Is the club in danger? What about dad and papa? She cries harder.
Sydney is young - she doesn't know or understand most of the things the club does. She has heard conversations she wasn't supposed to, but she never really has any idea what they're talking about. And that.. that is for the best. It isn't until Sydney gets a little older that she knows (part of) the extent of the club's illegal businesses, crimes, and murders.

Sydney recalls that hot Sunday in September they moved Tara in with them and is so happy Donna had such a good time with everyone.
Stop thinking that way, Sydney. Stop thinking as if she is already dead. You don't know that. People survive gunshot wounds all the time..
There have been some bumps in the road since that night. For instance, Wendy showed up and stirred the pot by trying to get in between Jax and Tara. Gemma even played part in that whole charade much to Sydney's dismay.

Jax gets home late on a Tuesday evening. He steps out of his shoes and slips out of his kutte and hangs it up. He makes his way through the quiet, cozy house and discovers that Tara has just laid Abel down in his crib. "Hey, babe" he says as he hugs her from behind and kisses her head. She leans into him but doesn't respond. "So, how was your day?" He asks her as they head to their bedroom. "Fine... accept for the fact that Wendy showed up at work and went off on me. I guess I was supposed to tell her that I was sleeping with her husband." Jax sighs and runs his fingers through his hair. "I'll deal with her" he says. Tara snorts, "it won't do any good. She has Gemma, who apparently still hates me, wrapped around her finger. She said Gemma will never let us be together and that she's putting on a front."
"Why are you so worried about what Wendy has to say? Besides, Gemma has no control over us. We're adults. We can do what we want." Tara, obviously not buying it, rolls her eyes. "Gemma controls everything! She has ahold of every man in town by the fucking balls."
"Not mine! Tara, I'm telling you, don't worry about it. I love you and I know you don't want Wendy around or Gemma trying to get between us and in your head, but we will get through this. I'll deal with it. Just keep doing what you're doing and don't let them get to you."
Little do they know, Sydney is awake and listening to their whole conversation. Sydney frowns and doesn't want to believe her grandmother is still acting this way towards Tara.. although she honestly wouldn't put it past her. One thing to know about Gemma is that when she hates someone, look out. Because she will make your life a living hell and be damn good at it. But when she loves someone, my God, when she loves, there isn't anything she wouldn't do to protect them. She would walk the ends of the Earth and swim the oceans for the ones she loves. And that is something to truly admire.

Sydney hears Tara sniffeling and feels sorry for her. "Come here, babe" Jax says. Sydney is unable to hear Tara's muffled response. "I know, baby. I'm not mad at you. I love you too."
Things were awkward when either Jax or Tara were in the same room with Gemma for about a month after that night. Sydney listened in on that argument too; the one between her father and his mother. This argument was much worse though because Jax, like his mother, is a hothead. There was a bunch of yelling ending with a door being slammed. Jax didn't want anything to do with her for weeks and Sydney felt torn because seeing her grandmother upset was hard - even if it was her own damn fault.

Sydney thought better of confronting Gemma about going behind their backs and taking sides with Wendy The Junkie. She knew someday she would be able to stand her ground against her but that wasn't today. Or even the next day. Or even next month. But, she knew someday she'd find her voice.

She also recalls how her mother never bothered to show up for her birthday this year. She didn't even call her or send her a card. Not even a stupid text message.

Sydney smiles as Tara pulls up in front of Charming Middle School. She opens the door to her Cutlass and gets in. "How was your first day of school as a teenager?" Tara asks. Sydney laughs, "it was good! I aced my Algebra test and we watched a movie in English. Plus, I don't have any homework!"
"That's awesome! Are you ready to party tonight?" Tara giggles. Sydney snorts, "yeah, more like 'am I ready to watch people party tonight?'"
Tara can't help but notice that something seems off with Sydney and that she keeps checking her cell phone.

The boys are just getting out of church as Tara and Sydney enter the clubhouse. There is a chorus of "Happy Birthdays" and she thanks everyone with a laugh. Jax approaches her and acts like he is going to embrace her in a hug. Instead he takes her by surprise by lifting her up in one swift motion and throwing her over his shoulder. She shrieks and laughs, "Dad!"
Just then Gemma enters the clubhouse to see Sydney. Smack. Sydney knew it was coming before it even happened. Yes, that's right, Gemma gave her a birthday spank. "Hey!" She yells and she tries to wriggle free from her father's grip. "You're just lucky I'm not giving you twelve - eleven - more!" Gemma says as she does it again. Jax laughs and sets his daughter on the ground and actually hugs her this time. "Happy Thirteenth Birthday, beautiful."

Later that night things are poppin' at the clubhouse in honor of Sydney's birthday. Every year on or over the closest weekend to Halloween they have a huge party. Members from other charters and their old ladies even come. Crow eaters are there too of course because girls like that don't turn down parties.

Sydney is dancing with a few long time crow eaters - they started coming around when they were just sixteen. Myra, a spunky, brunette with a little too much makeup on and perfect teeth is jumping up and down and grinding on Felicity. Felicity is your typical blonde bombshell with low self esteem. Her boobs are nearly falling out of her top. Typical as ever, she is dressed as a sexy school teacher. She's wearing a white, cropped button up that ties just beneath her boobs, a plaid mini skirt, white stockings that reach her knees and black high heels. Myra is basically wearing the same outfit but she's dressed as a sexy cop instead. "I can't wait until we can get you drunk, Syd! Don't tell your dad - actually, no - don't tell Gemma I said that" she giggles and takes a swig of the beer in her hand. "Maybe he will let me get drunk for my sweet sixteen?" Sydney thinks allowed as she bumps to the music. She can't help but feel a little out of place wearing twice as much clothes as they are, and she herself is wearing a tank top and shorts that are a little shorter than bermudas, but longer than "short shorts."

Juice walks by and is stopped by Myra. She turns him around and commands him to put his hands behind his back. "Someone's been a bad boy.." she giggles, obviously a little too drunk. She handcuffs him and nudges him towards the dorms. Sydney looks at Felicity who just laughs and finishes off her beer. I'm probably going to go join them, babe. I hope you have a good birthday!" She hugs her before chasing after them.

"Everyone gather around here!" Gemma shouts after turning down the music. "It's time to sing to the birthday girl!" She says as she places three, beautiful homemade chocolate cakes on the bar. "Get your ass over here, Syd!" Gemma commands. Sydney shyly makes her way through the crowd of members, old ladies, crow eaters, and close family friends. Jax is sitting on a barstool and signals for her to stand by him. Gemma dims the lights and lights the candles and they sing her Happy Birthday. She blows out the candles after making a wish. This year she wishes for Tara to stick around and be apart of the family. There is a chorus of "woos!" and clapping. "What'd you wish for?" Bobby asks her. "I can't tell you or it won't come true!" Sydney laughs. Jax wraps an arm around her and kisses her head. Gemma snaps a candid picture of this moment. "Okay, now smile for the camera, kids" she says to her son and granddaughter.

After a bunch of other pictures were taken to help remember a good night and everyone had eaten a slice of chocolate cake Sydney continues to hang around the bar with her dad, Tara, Opie, and Donna. Though there is a tug in her chest, she cannot deny that she had a good night - she always does when she is surrounded by everyone she loves.

Sydney holds in her emotions for two days but Sunday afternoon gets to her. She's been outside the club house playing catch and monkey in the middle with Kenny and Ellie. A while later Donna shows up to see the kids and talk to Opie. "Mommy!" They run to her and wrap their arms around her. She holds them close and smiles. "Hey, kids. I missed you guys! Are you having fun here with dad and everyone?"

Sydney feels a jealous lump in her throat forming and walks off before anyone notices the tears welling up in her eyes. She forces herself not to run because she doesn't want to bring any attention to herself. She makes her way up to her father's favorite spot on the roof and lets all the tears she's been holding in since Friday fall. Her mom has never been around much and she has come to accept that over the years. The issue though is that she usually at least calls and wishes her a Happy Birthday. Sydney, until now, had no idea that it actually meant something to her. She usually gets angry and rolls her eyes at the pathetic attempt. But it hurts even worse that she didn't bother to do or say anything this year and she's been afraid to admit that to herself let alone anyone else.

"Why did she go up there, Mommy? Can I go up there with her?" Kenny asks. "I don't know honey and no you cannot."
Tara hears this conversation and walks over. "Hey, Donna. How are you?"
Donna responds and asks the same of Tara. "I'm good. I'm a little worried about Sydney though" she says quietly after pulling her to the side. "She's been acting different since Friday and I think it might have something to do with Ashton." Donna looks up to the roof where Sydney is sitting and sighs. "Poor kid. I know that's rough. If you talk to her about it, send her my love. She has so many people around her that care about her. She doesn't need that selfish bitch." Tara nods in agreement.

Jax approaches them. "Donna," he nods, "how's it going?" Donna nods back. "Going good.. how's the Prince of Charming?" she jokes, knowing it'll push his buttons like it used to when they were kids. "Ha-ha" he mocks her.
"Are the kids having fun with Sydney?" He asks. "Yes, they were" Donna says. "Were?" He asks confused. Both Donna and Tara frown. "
She walked off and climbed up onto the roof without saying a word" Tara finishes for Donna. Jax sighs and moves his blonde hair out of his face. "I thought something was up with her.. Ashton didn't fucking bother to call. Not even a text. I honestly didn't think she would be all that bothered by it, but I can't say that I understand how she feels."
Tara and Donna nod. "I think no matter what it's going to hurt. But she's so stubborn and self-supporting - hmm, wonder where she got that from?" Donna says while giving Jax a knowing look, "that she doesn't want to admit it."

Sydney hears a noise and looks up to see Jax approaching her. She quickly looks down wipes her eyes. He sits next to her and doesn't say anything for a few minutes as they both stare out at Charming.
She twiddles her thumbs and picks at her finger nail polish as a few more tears continue to fall. Jax moves her hair behind her ear so he can see her face. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asks her. She doesn't respond. She leans into him and he pulls her closer and rubs her back as she finally cries it out.
"I'm sorry you're hurting, Syd. I wish I could take your pain away because I really hate to see you cry" he admits. "I know you do," she says through her tears, "I'm just so ashamed that she of all people can make me feel this way" she chokes out. Jax hugs her tighter and kisses her head. "I know, baby. I want to tell you that you shouldn't let her get you down because she isn't worth it but I know that won't make it any better. I can't force your mom to care and make up for all lost time." Sydney cries harder and Jax nearly pulls her up into his lap. "But please remember how much I love you and wouldn't know what to do or where'd I even be today without you. I probably wouldn't even be alive. Plus, you have so many other people behind you. Gemma, Tara, Clay and the rest of the club love you, kid."

Sydney makes a face at the memory because she still gets angry that her piece of shit mom can so easily get under her skin. Ashton tried to call Sydney a week after her birthday but she wouldn't take her calls, but who could blame her? She finally answered when her mom tried calling on Christmas a few times but it still doesn't makeup for how much she hurt her on her birthday.

Oh, and, not to mention, the ATF being on the club's ass. Although Sydney doesn't really know why and also has no idea it played such a large roll in Donna's shooting. All she knows is that their has been some tension within the club, especially between Jax and Clay. But, to be honest, even she knows that's the norm these days.

Gemma picks Sydney up from school and they head to Teller Morrow so she can do some work in the office. Sydney holds Abel while Gemma pecks away on the computer, her reading glasses perched on her nose.
They hear shouting coming from inside the garage and Sydney gently places Abel back in his carrier. She peeks through the blinds and sees Tig trying to get between her grandfather and her dad. Clay and Jax are nose to nose screaming at each other. "YOU'VE BEEN DISTRACTED AND NOT 100%. WE CAN'T AFFORD TO LOSE OUR FUCKING VP TO PUSSY. IT'S TIME YOU PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN ASS" Clay shouts at Jax which results in him letting out a mocking laugh. "ME? YOU REALLY THINK THAT I AM NOT 100% COMMITTED TO THIS CLUB? I HAVE STOOD BEHIND THIS CLUB AND ITS MEMBERS SINCE I WAS SIXTEEN YEARS OLD. IT'S ALL I'VE EVER KNOWN. DON'T BRING TARA INTO THIS. I HAVE A BABY AND A TEENAGER WHO ALSO NEED ME. I AM HERE FOR YOU GUYS AND HAVEN'T LET YOU DOWN. JUST BECAUSE I SEEM A LITTLE OFF DOESN'T MEAN I'M GOING TO FUCKING FLAKE OUT!" Jax yells back.

Gemma takes Sydney's hand away from the blinds so she can no longer watch the two most important men in her life scream in each other's faces. Just then Abel starts crying and now Gemma is pissed. She takes Abel into her arms and rocks him in hopes of soothing him. "It's okay, Abel. Don't cry" she commands while hushing him. Just then Juice enters the office to grab some paperwork. "Perfect. Here, baby. Hold Abel for me" she says as she hands Abel to Juice. Sydney stays silent. Gemma enters the garage just as they start throwing punches. "HEY, KNOCK IT OFF!" She yells. Clay, Jax, and Tig look at her. "You're making Abel cry and scaring Sydney. Take it elsewhere or I'll beat both your fucking asses."

Jax walks past his mother and into the office while Clay yells "this isn't over!" and gets a "fuck you" in response. Juice hands Abel to Jax and he takes him. "Thanks, man." Juice nods and leaves the little family alone. "I love you, Abel" he says kissing his son. "And I love you, Sydney. And I'm sorry. I didn't know you guys were in here" he admits.
A little shaken, Sydney manages a weak smile. "I love you too."
"Sydney? Can you come out here for a second?" Gemma asks. Jax kisses Sydney's cheek before she gets up to see what her grandmother wants. "I think your grandfather owes you an apology."
Clay holds out his arms and Sydney walks into them. He caresses her soft hair. "I'm sorry for scaring you, Angel. I love you" he says sincerely. "I love you too, Papa" she hugs him tighter.

Despite all these things that have happened over the past few months, none compare to what happened to Donna tonight. Everything else seems like nothing. Sydney worries about everyone's safety and nearly goes insane waiting for news about Donna. She finally falls asleep but is awoken by Jax around 1AM. "I'm sorry to wake you, babe.. but I need to talk to you and it's important." Sydney freezes and her breath hitches in her throat, preparing herself for whatever he is about to say...


Thank you for reviewing already, that really makes me happy! I kept adding onto this chapter each time I reread what I had already written and I hope it doesn't sound all jumbled up. The italics are flashbacks just in case anyone gets confused.