America stood there, glaring at Iran, who glared right back. All they were doing was staring at each other from across the table. The other countries sat in silence, unaware of what to do. China broke the silence by coughing loudly, breaking all the tension. Every country turned and looked at him.
"What?" China asked.
"Do you mind?" America said. "I'm trying to threaten a country, look how strong I am against any threat! I'm unstoppable!"
Iran sighed. "I hate you, I WILL KILL..."
Russia held up a sign that said "Nukes" on it
"...Any chance of a war…" Iran finished.
America laughed. "Yeah because I'd win, Ha Ha!"
A slurping sound filled the conference room. Once again, it was China interrupting. He was slurping a bowl of soup with a horrible stench
Australia nudged China "mate, what the bloody knife is that, mate?"
"Oh, it's just bat soup. want some?"
Australia shook his head. "Nah, mate. It's way too hot for soup anyway."
"What do you mean it's too hot? It's Febuary," Britain questioned.
Australia shrugged in response then burst into flames. Surprisingly, not many countries cared about the spontaneous combustion.
Australia said "One sec mate" and ran out of the room screaming
Britain said, "Well that was awkward, he should drink more water."
"Speaking of water, I think I like socialism now," America said.
A chorus of "What?!"s came in response. "I thought you hated socialists," Russia said.
Canada laughed, "Could it possibly be because of healthcare?"
America waved his hand dismissively. "Pfffft, Who cares about healthcare? I can live through anything"
China coughed again. The attention was back on him, and for some reason, he was mixing chemicals together.
"What are you doing there?" Italy asked
"Oh just mixing viruses for science, its science, therefore, shouldn't be questioned," China quickly responded. He coughed again. "It'll be fine."
"In other news, I officially completed getting out of the EU," Britain laughed nervously, "That's good right?"
Every European country rolled their eyes. "You don't know how lucky you are that World War III got canceled," Germany mumbled.
Another loud noise distracted everybody, and, once again, it was China. He was cracking open a bottle then drinking it.
"¿Por que amigo?" asked Mexico
"It's a beer I thought I should try. Corona. I think you made it."
"Si," Mexico said, "Be careful though, amigo. It could make you sick"
China coughed again. "I'll be fine. Remember when I got the black plague a couple of months ago, Europe remembers, but everything turned alright. Besides, I have a wall."
"Yeah, you do," America said. "And it keeps those criminal, illegal Mongolians out, doesn't it?"
China blinked. "Um… I guess…"
Mongolia was pissed. He stood up in a rage, slamming his hands on the table. "You know what America! YOU-"
Russia held up his 'nukes' sign again.
"You," Mongolia thought for a second about what he could say, but gave up and just sat down.
Britain looked around at the countries. "Well, America is still covered in blood, China is being quite disruptive, and Australia is God knows where being on fire. I think that this was enough excitement for one meeting. Enough for the whole year, I would say, and it's elementary. How about we go home and meet again in March?"
Everybody agreed. They'd all meet up again in February, and hopefully, everything would be less hectic.
To be continued
