Very short chapter as I am getting back into the swing of writing :)
I did decide to continue on! This is so much different than my other fic. It breaks my heart but I am enjoying a change of style since my other fic is generally not as sad as this one xD
"I see you dancing under the moonlight,
and it could not be any clearer to me,
how much this world loves to have you."
Tauriel stayed with Kili after Thranduil had left her for sought after privacy. Her heart and body still ached yet hope tried to shimmer in her heart. But the fire of hope he set in her was not wanting to rekindle. Yet the hope of seeing his smile and bright eyes again made her smile softly. The pull of her lips was foreign to her as she could not feel the full load of happiness a smile usually left in her. It was unusual because before any time her mind thought of HIM then it instantly caused her heart to beat faster and her blushing smile to take over her. But at least it was a small smile… trying so hard to make her heartbreak bearable.
Yet as her smile was still there, tears began to fall…. Her sobs shook her very core. The throbbing and aching pain of her body was nothing compared to the storm she had inside of her. Had she felt such distress before?
She looked at him… his youth and promise of life taken.
"You saved me" she whispered to the cold air around her as she leaned in to kiss his cheek. "Always with the recklessness my love"
Her scolding would have received an eye roll and a side grin… yet she received nothing. She bit her lip as another wave of uncontrolled crying threatened to overtake her. She heard approaching and heavy footsteps. They filed into view yet her eyes did little to acknowledge their presence.
They all looked at her with sorrow and pity. Most of the dwarven kin started to cry as they saw Kili's body laying there. Tauriel saw as the bald dwarf with a head covered with tattoos comforted an older dwarf whose white beard blended with the fallen snow gathered at their feet.
"Tauriel" one of them whispered… It was the halfling who had called her name. His voice was broken and farway. His eyes were filled with great sorrow that made him appear older. Her eyes were drawn to such distress as they mirrored hers.
"Tauriel" he repeated as he took a step towards them and her wounded mind and instinct made her fist tighten at Kili's metal mail in a protective manner. "They need to take him"
His voice was apologetic yet he gave her a small smile as to calm her actions. She swallowed the thick desperation and agony caught at her throat.
"A few more minutes please" she begged as another round of tears made their way down her moist cheeks. Her puffy, red eyes begged and looked to them all. They could not say no to those eyes. The once strong, powerful and witty elf they had met briefly was now gone. A stranger was there in front of them, with familiar pain written in her eyes. The same pain they all shared.
The one she remembered from Laketown and had found the Athelas came forward. His humorous spark was gone and a deep shadow covered his eyes.
"You may come to the funeral Tauriel, but we must take him now" he said, his voice soft and once again apologetic. Everyone was giving her the same look…. that of apology and pity. How much did they know? How deep was their knowledge in the affection that she had shared with Kili. Did she herself know? Of course… the pain in her heart was no liar. The presence of sorrow meant that he had truly existed and it was not a wonderful dream that turned into a dark nightmare.
The pain she felt was the loudest reminder that she had fallen in love with him. She had foolishly fallen in love without giving much thought to the consequences. But her mind did not think at all when he had been overtaking her every thought.
Her mind stopped... She was about to argue with Bofur when she forced her mouth shut as she remembered that those standing in front of her were Kili's family members… his dear friends. She could not disrespect any traditions Kili was a part of.
She nodded…. yet only Bofur caught it because her head tilted down in the slightest of movements. Her stubborn tears did not stop their tracks and her heart still screamed for Kili to wake up. She leaned forward and kissed his forehead and she shuttered at the feel of his cold skin.
"Gi melin" Tauriel whispered before she retreated. She had sneaked the runestone into his pocket yet at the last second she grabbed it…. she could not bring herself to abandon the stone. He would have liked her to keep it. Right?
She held onto the stone with both hands as if it were her last life line as the dwarves around her came over and picked him up. Their faces were dull and solemn. None spoke but to only give directions. Her body rose with much effort. She followed them and she found that her body shook and her feet felt heavy. The cold wind around her blew angrily making her shed tears feel like frozen droplets. Has winter always been this cold? she thought.
The stone at her hands was warm and his voice saying his promise repeated in her mind over and over again. Each time his words hurt her, as if arrow after arrow was buried deep into her skin. She winced and shuddered when she remembered the way his eyes sparkled when he had said those words, keep it as a promise... those words that haunted her. His eyes had resembled sweet molten honey…. eyes that she dearly wanted to get captured by for an eternity. Eyes that would have made any map useless as she would have gladly wandered around. It is true she thought, not all those who wander are lost. But now she felt nothing but lost. Truly lost.
Thanks for reading! Longer chapters will come. I still do now know how long this will be but I am striving for at least 8-10 chapters.
:) See ya!
Quote there at the end is from Tolkien :) Its always been a favorite quote of mine.
Top quote- Raniaava (via Tumblr)
