""Rise! O, Dark Lord of Despair! Crush the stars! Lay waste to care! Rise and cover the land in sorrows! May your symphony of emptiness bring an end to all tomorrows!" No one knows from whence he came…only that he has existed for aeons…unchanging and unrelenting. It seems this being of darkness will wander the galaxy…until one day he is reborn into a new existence. Void exists in all dimensions…but his shining form in another dimension…inspired the Ancients to transcribe his mysteries in sacred texts. What will be written next? Will the new scrolls describe a destroyer of worlds? Or an ally to the stars?" -Ancient celestial text roughly translated from Lumine Lettering

In CWCville, the almighty goddess has amassed a ludicrous amount of the anomalous cure serum. This compound, which the scientific community has christened "ZC-2599-ACS", as its true designation, since goes by many names. Xe has several tens of thousands of these dispersed within the CWCville military. Even though xir has his nondescript cringy OCs as commanders of the different factions, Chris Chan still needs an elite guard, much like that tubby guy he idolizes so much so that his city is modeled after his. What was his name again…it was Kim something?

Anyway, to this end, he created five archons, with zeself being the grand mistress archon over them all! The first being what looks like the red headed stepchild daddy used to beat all grown up. This man has orange hair straighter than a razor blade and sick shades to hide his devilish eyes. He is wearing a pale green denim coat. Bestowed upon him was an ivory ring with a grandiose crown, pelted with arrows!

The second archon, birthed from mother Earth herself has no definable shape, for she represents the inhibition within us all. Following the golden rule, she won't attack unless king, country or self is besieged, but once that happens, she is near unstoppable! Feeding on humanity's desire for guts and glory, her unquenchable bloodlust is only stopped by a murderous mark. Homo homini lupus est, indeed. Her crimson circlet depicts a bloodstained sword.

The third archon, a celestial being from another dimension. It was birthed ever since the universe's creation and untold power is wielded by it to effortlessly defeat all who had opposed it. Having all the powers of the universe at its disposal does nothing to quell its appetite for chaos. This being is a pink spherical creature that has thin blue neodymium magnet like eyes with nubs for arms and nutshell like pods for feet. His perfect black signet emblazons a black hole with a gamma ray burst in the center of it.

The fourth archon isn't so much an archon as it is an esoteric idea. We all fear something right? Fear makes us do stupid things, does it not? Which phobia do you have? Gerascophobia? Atelophobia? Foniasophobia? Eremophobia? Chronophobia? Hormephobia? Mastigophobia? Coulrophobia? Melophobia? Proditiophobia? Scopophobia? Methylphobia? Thanatophobia? It can inflict all of these and more! Fears plague our mind and poison our soul with its grasp on our psyches. All we have to fear is fear itself, right FDR? Because it is abstract, it has no ring.

And of course, the fifth archon, you know them, you love to troll them, it's Chris Chan. Ze's ashen signet logo is a broken skull with its brain appearing to degenerate.


"You four will be the guardians of CWCville. With me as rightful ruler, none shall oppose us! Soon, the Dimensional Merge will unite fiction and reality into one grand universe!"

Xir manically laughs. However, it at appears the Archon of Famine has some reservations. All of the other archons (except Pestilence) are firmly chaotic evil, while Famine is chaotic neutral. This mismatch of alignments is sure to cause some chaos! Famine also can't "communicate" like the others (yes, even Pestilence can communicate, even though it is an idea). Famine tries to communicate to the mad dictator, but Chris Chan smacks him away.

"What is wrong with you, Famine?! You dare oppose me?!"

Famine stands its ground.

"Archons, stand down. He's mine."

Famine is forced to defend himself from this tyrant. He immediately uses the power of a black hole to absorb zir. Chris Chan responds by throwing bombs down at him, which he gets the bomb ability out of.

"Usually when you feed something a bomb, it explodes! How are you still alive?!"

Chris Chan tries to burn Famine away, the rubber coating surrounding Famine begins to weaken and melt, cracking it.

"Burn away!"

A luminous energy radiates from within the rubber. The energy tears itself out of its rubber suit. This being of pure light temporarily blinds the other archons. The energy fuses its former leglike appendages into a spiky taillike nub with two other "feet" for it to walk on. Radiant wings emerge from its arm nubs; However, they are disjointed so the creature can still use its nubs, but the greatest change is that the being's mouth changes to have a dark blue eye with a pupil blacker than space itself, with a "pseudo-mouth" forming its "mouth". Its pseudo-mouth can still copy abilities. The eye-mouth, arms, tail and pseudo-mouth can attack independently from one another!

This Kirby/Zero Two hybrid even gets a dramatic boss subtitle opening!

Celestial Remnant, Void

Chris Chan "pauses" to see if this incarnation of Void has a pause description just like in the video games. Surprisingly…it does.

Formed from the same energy that caused the Big Bang, this fragment of pure chaos has redirected the powers of the universe at you! Can anyone defeat it at even 1 in 8 octillionths of its original power?!


Chris Chan unpauses as Void changes its ability to its needle form. Its wings turn as hard as quills, its tail turns into a spiky cactus to club Chris Chan with, it's eyes fire eightfold spiky cluster bombs, kind of like Just Shapes and Beats' pulse bombs but triangles instead of circles and the pseudo-mouth juts out a javelin sized spike!

"Cute, it's going to poke me. What ability counters needle? How about…wheel!"

Chris Chan tries to use the wheel ability and runs over the angel creature several times before a spike bomb pops him and causes him to skid his face on the pavement. Ze reverts back to normal. Void appears to have a flashback of some sort, hearing an insane cultist speak in moon rune.

"上昇、絶望の暗い主! 星そのつぶす! ケアする廃棄物を横たわる!"

Void changes into its cutter form. Its wings' segments burst into approximately 20 bladed boomerangs, it's tail turns into a wave shot from Galaga to blast anyone away with a cutter pulse. Its eye launches a tracer boomerang that homes into its target while the pseudo-mouth spits out a return boomerang.

"Boomerangs? Easy."

Chris Chan transfigures himself and turns into solid metal. And he plods as slowly as a 600-pound man to the Heart Attack Grill, Chris Chan slowly walks into the being, doing chip damage to it until it moves on to its next phase.

"上昇がって悲しみの土地を覆う! あなたの空虚の交響曲が明日すべてを終わらせますように!"

Void turns into its stone form. This form has the second least variance in its attacks, but its wings burrow into the ground, causing a Stone Edge like move to hurt its opponents, its tail becomes a stalactite, causing fissures and earthquakes to destabilize anyone, it's eye and pseudo-mouth fires off rocks at its opponents.

Chris Chan merely scoffs and blasts the being with a hyper pressurized jet stream, dealing massive damage to its weak point and immediately sending it into its next phase.

"ダークロード,カオスが成長するにつれて! 破壊力を胚内に保存する!"

Void switches into its ice form. Its wings turn into ice shards that can impale its target when it flaps its wings, like the silicon storm of HB189733b, its tail tuns into a massive icicle it can shoot out at people, it's eye fires off blocks of ice and its pseudo-mouth breathes out a nitrogen wind to instant freeze anyone that gets close to it!

Chris Chan just does her best SCP-457-EN impression and uses Flare Blitz on it until it goes into its next phase. Since fire melts ice, it happened within 20 seconds.

Void turns extremely luminous, so luminous that it knocked out power to Virginia, Tennessee, Kentucky, West Virginia and Maryland! Yes, the entire state! They're actually pretty lucky it's this weak. Since at peak strength, the Earth would have been vaporized already, since it would have been as hot as a quasar! Naturally, everyone notices this. Since Trump can't nuke a hurricane, he definitely can't nuke a lukewarm quasar. People can't even shoot at it since, even in its weakened form, it can melt bullets. Guess they'll just have to live without power for a while.

"あなたの翼に, 暗い判断がもたらす!"


"Incomprehensible amount of energy detected. Massive amount of unknown cosmic energy centralized in Ruckersville, Virginia."

Lisa notices this oddity.

"Eldest sister? Didn't you say that Ruckersville would turn into a post-apocalyptic wasteland?"

"It appears we're at the beginning of the end."

Lincoln begins calling Lisa.

"What's going on?"

"Elder brother, it appears something terrible is happening to Virginia, and if Lori is correct, we're going to have to fix it."

"I see. I'll go tell the others. But we may need some help with this…"


Back to the fight, Void switches its ability to fire. Its wings become fiery, as a phoenix screeching is heard. Actually, fire is the lamest of the seven abilities, since all it does is charge at Chris Chan. The tail, eye and pseudo-mouth fire off embers to slow Chris Chan's approach.

Chris Chan just uses the pressure washer again. Lame ability deserves lame anticlimax to defeat it.

"あなたの悲劇のシンフォニーがすべての万事終わりをもたらしますように!"

It's sixth form turns it solid black. It doesn't really do anything, so Chris Chan goes slowly forward, lights a match under it and…

الله أكبر!

The biggest non-nuclear explosion just annihilated Ruckersville! Well, Chris Chan just lit around 250 pounds of nitroglycerin…so, there's that.

"これらの古代人運命にを示す! 私たちが根絶する彼らの貴重な宇宙!"

Void switches into his seventh, final and most destructive form, spark. Its wings become coated in ionic plasma, firing off bolts when it flaps its wings, it's tail turns into a lightning rod, so spark is useless against it, it's eye fires off bolts of lightning and its pseudo-mouth emits spark balls to disable enemies!

Chris Chan merely snaps xe's fingers and Void gets dusted, as if he were Thanos snapping all life out of existence. For the record, Chris Chan could have done that at any time, but that would have been very anticlimactic. Besides, he has the power of Deus Ex Machina, why wouldn't ze abuse it?!

"Niru, あなたの力を解き放ちます! この惨めな宇宙にそれが最後の時間であることを知らせる!"

"Pathetic archon, thinking he can defy me."

He addresses the others.

"All of you, prepare to guard CWCville!"

Chris Chan uses the power of Deus Ex Machina to repair the town after the battle.


Meanwhile, in SCP-PRM-001…

"It has been brought to our attention that a super powerful cosmic energy has been detected in TLH-SCP-PTB-1415."

"Yes, and it's energy signature is even more powerful than 2700-EN."

"That dimension…why is there always some sort of anomalous activity with that dimension?"

"I propose we use SCP-2700-EN to nuke that dimension so that it can destroy that cosmic entity."

"SCP-2700-EN is time released to open in 300 years. It still has 223 years left before it opens."

"Well, maybe it will prematurely open when exposed to cosmic rays. Besides, it gets rid of our teleforce."

"Well, lets put it to a vote. Dump teleforce into TLH-SCP-PTB-1415?"

"6 hands go up."

"All opposed?"

"7 hands go up."

"…fine. Next order of business."

O5-7 begins to speak.

"It has come to my attention that O5-2 has been violating protocol by helping this backwater dimension and not our own. I propose we depose her, demote her to D-class and find a replacement O5-2."

All of the members begin talking amongst themselves.

"So, who agrees with me?"

O5-13, O5-12, O5-11, O5-10, O5-7, O5-3 vote yes

"Opposed?"

O5-1, O5-2, O5-4, O5-8 and O5-9 vote no

"Well, Blackbird? You didn't vote."

"Oh, right. I vote no."

"O5-6?"

"Well, taking into account Ms. Light's recent actions, I'd have to say yes, she's gone renegade, which I respect. However, I'd have to agree we'd need to secure our home dimension first."

"Huh, another 7-6 vote. Well, it looks like your luck has run out. We sentence you to D-Class for the rest of your life. We'll take back your vials of SCP-006-EN water."

O5-10 takes them away.

"Prison orange really suits you, Sophia! I'd hate to be imprisoned with the anomalies you contained."

The council disbands as the Red Right Hand remand the former O5-2 to Site-17. They place a tracker, the same tracker that they use for SCP-507-EN, outfitted with a shock collar in case she tries to escape. Α1 escort her out.

O5-11 goes to a far away secure room and calls someone.

"Δ command? It's me. Yeah, that crazy bitch voted an O5 out. If you're going to attack, now's the time. Which one got deposed? O5-2, why? Oh, you wanted her gone since she's the biggest threat? Yeah, I agree. O5-7 is the most dangerous one and she's taken over O5-2's district temporarily."

Should intermittent vengeance arm again his red right hand to plague us?

It appears SCP-PRM-001 has gone to shit now. O5-7 just ousted O5-2 in a lust for power. O5-11 was really a plant for the Chaos Insurgency and they might attack the Foundation. The council is in disarray! And what's even worse, Sophia won't be able to help Lisa as a D-Class! They're going to have to face Chris Chan on their own.