Prologue: Headmaster Hand

It's been a while since I was last awake.

My most recent memory is being exploded by some terrorist and their bomb. Everdred. That was his name. The word spins in my mind, like an unkempt storm.

"I thought you were dead," Elmore says, her voice drifting in from the other side of my cell. They're visiting, I think. All of the villagers I saved. It's hard to tell. It's hard to understand the order of things at the moment.

"We're not," Pusher declares heartily. Of course. He's here too. And Duster. Constable Mighty arrested us all. That's right. He took us away.

"We'll get you out of there," whispers a female voice. I pull myself up from my deathbed, trying to examine the scene, but it's all a blurry haze.

"Lie y'self down, mister Hand," says Duster, and I feel something heavy on my shoulder. I don't have the energy to do anything but obey.

"He's not been doing so well, m'chaps," Duster says gravely. "Can't hear half o' what we're saying. Wakes up all the time. Shouting. Could really do with Ollie's technical advice-"

"I hope Ollie and Angie are alright," Caroline says, fretting. "That school is so far away…"

"It was for-" I try, but Duster shushes me.

"He looks bad," Roy says quietly. I want to rise, tell him that no I don't, but it's true. Something in that explosion has ruined me.

"We've got that Psychic Stone of yours," Ike says. "We got Marth to mail it to the house."

Good, I think blearily. Byleth had contacted us; he'd seen Ness and Lucas burying it in the forest. I had to procure it before anyone else could.

"It's pretty," Pusher says. There is greed in his voice. I open my eyes; something glints in radiant gold.

"Put it away," I croak. "Someone will see."

"Quiet, Headmaster," Tessie says worriedly, and I feel something damp being placed on my forehead. "Don't use your voice. Don't overexert yourself."

"There is nothing wrong with me-"

Tessie's face is gaunt, and I can't understand why. It was just an explosion, wasn't it? What's the problem?

"Get some rest, Headmaster Hand," Ike says from far away, and I feel my eyes slipping into darkness. I try to cling on, but I can't. The world dissolves into red and black.

The sound of metal hitting wood reverberates through the cell.


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~~o00o~~

Chapter 57: Naturalise Me

(Lucas)

~~o00o~~

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I've fucked up.

Sometimes, I find that hard to admit, but on this occasion, I have fucked the greatest up in the history of my entire life.

Ness sleeps soundly, his head against my chest. He got drunk, stupidly drunk last night, egged on by Ninten and Toon Link. They got so drunk that they went outside to find a Future Human.

It's just as well I was watching out the window.

One PK Fire finished the monster off, and then Ness took very little convincing to come with me indoors. He collapsed against me as soon as we were under the covers, and now we're here.

It's my fault.

I've not been giving him the attention he deserves. He's been silently screaming for it, and I have been so, so blind. He's turned to someone who will listen - Ninten - someone who's calm, collected, irritatingly cool. Someone who it's much easier to talk to about his worries.

Stupid, I think to myself, over and over again. I've blown it.

I guess you never know what you have until it's gone.

Daybreak comes, and Ness moans, hurling his stomach into the toilet bowl for the third time in twenty minutes. I run a steady hand through his hair, just being there, being where he needs me, trying to ignore the putrid stench of his vomit. There is whiskey in there, I think. Curse Ninten for doing this to him.

"I hate this," Ness mumbles, flopping against my shoulder. "Everything hurts so much."

"Of course it does. You got completely wasted."

"I don't even remember…" He shakes his head, groaning like some sort of zombie. "I don't understand."

"It was Ninten and Toon Link," I say. "You were drinking with them."

"How did I end up in bed?"

"I practically had to carry you in," I explain, thinking of how cold it was out there, being dressed in only my pyjamas. Ninten and Toon Link hadn't been much help, giggling and falling over themselves. "You got attacked by a Future Human."

"…I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too, Ness." I hold him tight, not wanting to lose him. Selfishly wanting him to be mine forever.

I guide him down the stairs. His breath stinks, but I don't tell him. He feels sufficiently bad as it is. I can practically sense it through our psychic connection - it's enough to make my head hurt. When I find Ninten, there'll be very harsh words to be said.

"An apple should help," Villager chides, as Ness sits down. "Why'd you have to go and get drunk, anyway?"

"Completely irresponsible," Red mutters, digging into his oatmeal. "We won't win the battle by getting smashed! There are much more important tasks at hand!"

"People think it's us," Ness mutters, vaguely.

"What?"

"Causing people to glow purple. Ninten said-"

I take a vicious bite of my toast. "I don't think we should be trusting what Ninten says right now."

Ness moans with protest. "But he's my friend!"

"He got you drunk! He put you in a vulnerable position! Does that seem like a good friend to you?"

With a sheepish grin, Toon Link arrives, supported by a disgruntled Pit. He plonks a bowl of oatmeal on the table.

"How's the hangover, Ness?"

"Terrible," Ness moans, spilling his spoonful of cereal while he speaks. Milk drips miserably down his chin. I would laugh if it wasn't so pathetic.

I shoot a glare at Toon Link as he sits himself down. As far as I'm concerned, this very much comes under my nobody hurts Ness philosophy.

"Toon Link. You shouldn't have been drinking last night," Villager says scathingly. "I heard about what happened with the Future Human. Ness is vulnerable at the moment, and-"

"I can make my own decisions," Ness mutters.

Villager ignores him. "It was stupid, so stupid to go over the top. Don't you know your limits?"

Toon Link winces. A telling-off from Villager is sure to set him straighter than anything I could say.

"It was fun," he says carefully. "But you're right. We got carried away-"

"It's my fault," Ness grumbles. "I invited him-"

"It's Ninten's fault," I say, just as the bandanna-clad boy chooses to join us.

The tension is palpable. He's with Ana, which means I can't lay into him too hard, but I still burn with distant anger. I don't trust him anymore. Just like I don't trust Saul, who I realise I forgot to check on last night. Cursing, I stand; my disputes can wait for now.

"I'll be back."

Ness moves to follow me, which makes my heart do a hopeful leap, but Villager sits him back down. Perhaps it's for the best.

Saul is thankfully where he should be, and I shove a plateful of toast through his doorway, to muttered assent. I need to decide what to do with him. He certainly can't stay here forever, not when he's squatting in Claus' dorm. But that reminds me that I haven't seen Claus yet today, and then I realise something that makes my heart skip a beat.

Claus wasn't in the bedroom last night.

Hurrying into our dormitory, I search everywhere. Under the bed, under the covers, inside the wardrobe. It's all barren, empty of life. No Claus. He's gone.

I whirl around, wringing my hands. How could I have been so stupid? How could I have not noticed — this is a disaster! What if Porky has him? What if he's gone into the forest? I rush down the stairs, almost catapulting myself headlong into Ness.

"Lucas?"

"Have you seen Claus?" I ask desperately.

Ness sways, putting a hand to his head.

"I haven't - I uh. I don't feel too good, I'm gonna…"

He bolts into the bathroom.

"Damn it!" I hurtle down the corridor, aiming for Rosalina's office - she might have been giving him classes! But before I can get there, I collide with Professor Byleth.

"Woah there, Lucas! I was just about to ask; another lesson in my office tonight? I've found some information, that-"

"Okay!" I exclaim, impatiently pushing past Bowser, who roars my name, before practically tumbling into Rosalina's room.

She looks up from her paperwork, shocked. "Lucas?"

"Have you seen Claus?"

"Not since yesterday afternoon-"

"No!" I exclaim, panic fully coursing through me. I lost him once before. I can't lose him again!

"Lucas, sit down, what's wrong?" Rosalina says, but I run away, hardly hearing her. I need to find Claus. Porky can't have him. I won't allow it.

I've fucked up again.

I've lost him.

Sometimes, I view my life as a giant jigsaw puzzle. There are pieces, parts of it that come and go to build a changing picture. Some of the pieces don't fit quite right, and sometimes the pieces go missing, but right now it feels like most of the pieces have disappeared to the other side of the world. I'm trying to hold the rest of them in place, but I'm not doing a very good job.

"Are you coming to Anthropology class?" Villager asks, coming up behind me.

"Yes," I say, because I badly want to see Ness again before beginning my search. "I'll be a moment."

"Sure thing."

Vexed, I think it over. Ness will help me. He's always been good at holding my puzzle pieces together. Then we can work on Porky's riddle, and figure out what on Earth we're going to do about Porky's prom tomorrow. Something's going to happen.

I can feel it.

I make my way into the Anthropology classroom, where Professor Rosalina is already speaking about the human condition. There is a space next to Ness, who still looks majorly unwell, so I gladly fill it.

"Humanity is flawed," Rosalina says, surveying us over newly acquired spectacles. "We live and we breathe to serve ourselves, because of course, we are driven by the ultimate desire to survive. Each human survives through different means, but each human is alive through different means as well. We all see the world in different colours, experiencing things in the way our mind expects us to. We absorb information, storing it in different constructs, remembering through different patterns. It is how we process this information and the way it impacts our actions that gives us personality."

Ness flops weakly against my shoulder. In the front row, Toon Link and Villager silently laugh over a shared joke.

"Love exists in the same vein," Rosalina says, pacing down the classroom's aisle. "Each person must love differently, according to their memories and interactions. Each person must experience love in a different way, whilst also expressing this love in a different manner. The way you love your friends, your family, your partners." She casts an eye towards Link and Zelda, who I notice are sitting back together again. "Your version of love could be what makes you distinctly human."

Ness groans a little against my shoulder, and I put a steady arm around him. He smiles gratefully at me, and I smile back, softly. I'm there for him. He'll be okay.

The lesson ends quicker than I'd like, by which point Ness is thankfully able to stand up on his own, and some of the feelings of constant inescapable pressure have lifted from my shoulders. But Villager, Toon Link and Red hurry over, looking business-like.

"We're skipping double History," Villager announces. "All of us. Ness, Lucas, you need to work on your training-"

"Claus is missing," I say. "Ness and I were going to find him."

Ness looks up with surprise. "We were?"

"Yes. What about the rest of you?"

"Apparently, we're working on Porky's riddle," Toon Link says, grinning. "Villager has finally acknowledged my incredible deduction skills."

Red scoffs. "You could not tell a rabbit from a hare!"

"Where's Pit?" Ness asks blearily, looking between our group as if he's never seen us before.

"The library," Villager says. "Now, come on! We haven't got long. Tomorrow's going to be…" He gulps.

Our expressions all say the same thing. Porky's Prom means nothing good.

I drag Ness towards the music room, while the others disappear off to complete their tasks.

"Why didn't you say that Claus had gone missing?" Ness asks, frowning.

"Because you were too busy getting drunk with Ninten."

"Well," Ness says, but he's unable to think of a refute, and he sighs. "Sorry. You're not really that angry with him, are you?"

Heat ripples over my fingertips. "No," I lie.

"Good, because he's a great guy, really! He's nice, he listens, he's funny…"

Everything you're not.

"He sounds wonderful," I say blandly, thinking of how I might be able to catapult him into the sun.

"Now," Ness says keenly, taking my hand. "Claus! Where did you last see him?"

I wrack my brains. I certainly saw him yesterday; he was looking worried about something, but we didn't have the time to ask what it was. After that, was he in assembly? I don't know. How could I not have noticed? Was I so used to him being gone?

"I'm not entirely sure," I murmur, as we begin to search the music room. It's a rather futile idea, I can't help but think, but Claus loved music. He loved to hide away and sing.

There is a lot to be said for music, and the power that it has, but I've never really felt it like others do. For Claus, music was an escape, I think, especially after Mother was killed. Sometimes he'd sing happy songs, about Tazmily and the sunflowers, but sometimes there'd be sad songs as well. Songs about violence and anger and revenge. Those ones filled me with chills, when his words were even colder than the Onett winter skies. He was confident, my rock, but scarily so. Determination drove him to his demise, I think.

Could that have happened again? Surely not, I think miserably to myself, but I cannot be sure. When I try to push for premonitions through the psychic powers, I feel nothing but a mental brick wall standing in my way. I'd like to think that Claus wouldn't be stupid enough to go after Porky for a second time, but it's very hard to tell what Claus might do at any given moment. One minute he's stoic, brave, the next he's a terrified child.

Claus is not under the timpani. He's not behind the harpsichord. He's not amongst the cellos. It's vexing; I'm dragged down by the entire situation. I don't think I should ever have brought him to this school, but I was selfish. I wanted to keep him in my sight.

I couldn't even do that properly.

Ness strums the harp, looking absent-minded. "I'll miss this room if we lose the battle."

"What?" I stare, caught aback. "What battle is this?"

"Well, you know. That's how these things usually end, isn't it?"

I look at him. He looks sad, unkempt, his shirt overflowing from his trousers. I move over to tuck it in properly.

"Not always. Porky's scared. He wouldn't go into battle."

"He'd send in his Future Humans," Ness says miserably. "There's too many of them for us to fight."

"It's not a battle we could win," I admit. If Porky does attack us with everything he has, what then? We find a way around, that's what. We push through the hordes with everything we have. "Don't lose hope. I don't think it will end in fighting. The end will fall quietly."

"Our end, or Porky's?" Ness looks up at me. "What happens if he wins?"

I finish tucking in his shirt, but I keep my hands steady on his hips. "You're hungover," I chide. "Why are you thinking about that? That's miles away from here."

"Isn't it important, though? Porky's so much more powerful than us. He's got more money, he's got Future Humans, knowledge…"

I run my hands over his sides. He melts into the touch. This time, I won't fuck up. I won't be cold.

"He doesn't have what we have."

"What do we have, Lucas? What do you want us to have?"

I hold him close, feeling his pulse racing against mine. His hair is warm, smelling like maple syrup and crisp winter apples. His breath swirls against my cheek, soft as a gentle breeze.

"We have the world."

He kisses me.

This time, it's perfect. No more awkward fumbling on the bank of the Onett river. The doors are unlocked to a new world, full of colour, vibrance and love. It's ours, and it cannot be described, because only we can feel it. Only we can share it. Only we can understand what this feeling means.

"I love you," I say, when we pull apart, because it's true. I want to be his, I want him to touch me, to hold me, to live out a life with me if he likes, because Ness is home, Ness is safe, Ness is the cornerstone of my jigsaw puzzle.

"And if Porky separates us?" Ness asks, but he looks like he knows the answer.

"Then we'll fight until we're dead on the floor, or until we've found one another again."

"And if we lose?" he asks, cheeks glowing.

I hold him close. "We lose together."

"That's all I ever needed to hear."

He kisses me again. This togetherness is what I need; I think this is why I never dreamt of selling him out to Geldegarde, no matter the consequences he threatened. Sometimes what we have feels so painfully, intricately human, but at other times it's a blossom of magic, searingly ethereal.

Ness puts a hand to my butt, and I have to giggle. He grows red-cheeked and warm, pulling it away, "Sorry, is that not-"

"It's fine," I laugh. "You can touch me there. You can touch me anywhere you like."

"Really?" Ness says incredulously, and I smile. If this experience has taught me anything, it's that I trust this boy more than anything else.

"Yeah. Really."

I take his hand, and a sort of solemn understanding passes between us.

"We should keep searching," Ness says, after a few seconds, his face a ruby red. Unfortunately, he's right; Claus won't be rescued on his own, and after a couple of hours spent scouring the ground floor, I'm beginning to worry that he won't be found with our help either. It's ridiculous, really, and by the time lunch rolls around, my momentary joy from the music room has nearly faded.

"There you are!" Toon Link exclaims, when Pit finally emerges from the library. He waves, sitting tiredly in front of his plate.

"Here I am indeed."

"Where have you been?" Red demands.

"Thinking. Planning. Whatever." Pit shrugs, taking a hefty bite from his cheese and ham sandwich (the student cooks seem to have resorted to simpler dishes). "I'll tell you once it's all sorted. Any luck on the riddle?"

Villager produces a copy of Crime and Punishment. "We thought we'd wait until you all got here. Find Claus?"

"No," I say. "He's gone."

"He'll be somewhere," Toon Link says confidently. "I reckon he's secretly a badass."

Villager laughs. Evidently, they're back on good terms. "That's no secret. Didn't you see him fighting those Cave Boys?"

"He saved our lives! We owe him one, to be honest-"

"Anyway," I interrupt, despite being a little proud of my brother for this unexpected legacy he's created. "We need to find him, or we'll be in trouble. If this all comes to war…" I sneak a glance at Ness. "I think we'll need to be prepared."

"Exactly my thinking," Pit says importantly. "I think it's high time we spread a little awareness about all of this, Porky's misdemeanours…" I frantically shush him, noticing Porky standing up from the staff table, his beady eyes fixed upon us.

"…And that's what I think about the economic state of China!" Pit says loudly, as Porky walks past, looking surprisingly tired for once. The sleeves of his shirt are unbuttoned, and the scarring on his right arm is more visible than ever. He catches me staring, and gives me a simpering look, before disappearing down the main corridor.

"What were you saying?" Villager prompts.

"Well, I've had an idea." Pit bumps his knuckles together, lowering his voice away from any unpleasant ears. "I say it's time to tell people what's going on. Gather everybody that we trust, so that if it comes to a fight, they'll be on our side. I'm thinking people like Ninten, Paula-"

"Of course," Toon Link grins.

"Shut it! She's just a friend! We should also invite Jeff, and Tony, and Link-"

"Link?!" Red exclaims, thunderstruck. The green-robed boy looks over.

"I am called upon?"

"No, you are not!"

"Are you challenging me to a duel?!"

"Aha! That's the kind of fighting spirit we need!" Pit exclaims, as Link stands, brandishing a sword.

"Stop!" I exclaim, and several students hurry away in fear at the sound of my voice. Red throws Crime and Punishment at Link, but he knocks it with his blade into the path of Diddy Kong-

"Hey!"

"Fight! Fight! Fight!" Bowser Junior cheers, and Ness grabs my hand.

"No fighting!" Villager exclaims, but it's lost amongst the onslaught when Diddy Kong throws himself at Link's head. Chaos reigns, cheering and whooping ringing out, and Red dives in to try and retrieve the book, but it's futile as the battle intensifies, fists and blades in the mix-

"Link! Stop!" Zelda exclaims, and only at that do the pair spring apart, angry and huffing at one another.

"He started it!"

"No, him!"

"No-"

"Come on," Red says scathingly, brandishing the book. "Let us exit this madhouse!"

"Oh yeah, so you can work your magic on more people?" Diddy Kong sneers, turning on us. "It's all your fault, all you homos-"

"Yeah!" Bowser Junior exclaims, waving his fist. "You're bringing Satan's wrath upon us all-"

"Turning them purple-"

"No, you fucknuggets!" Toon Link cries. "It's Porky! He's doing all this!"

"Porky's great!"

"Then you're delusional!"

"Come on!" Red insists, actually grabbing Villager by the sleeve and tugging him away, and I follow, trying to ignore the hurls of abuse, and the way that most of the other students lean away from us. We're like a band of rogues, trying to fight the good fight amongst a horde of disbelievers.

Rain splatters from outside of Toon Link's window when we fall into his room, and I glance up at the stopped clock that caused us so much trouble before. The decor has changed from when Link lived here; a broad painting of the Pit family now hangs over what once was Link's bed, brushed in surprisingly masterful strokes. The books and clothes have become a lot more tasteful, and best of all, the hyper-manly stench of cheap deodorant is gone. There is also a box of condoms on Toon Link's bed, which he tries to subtly push out of view.

"Nice," Ness says, grinning.

Toon Link turns red. "Ignore those."

"Gladly," Red huffs, opening the book onto Toon Link's bedside table. "I do not need to know of your penile activities."

"Penile activities!?" Pit exclaims, laughing. "You make it sound like he has an STI!"

"If he's using protection, maybe he does," Red says seriously.

"Or perhaps Villager's got one," Ness cackles. "Given he's on top-"

"I do not have any STIs!" Villager turns the pages of the book, turning a distinct crimson. "Does anyone have a copy of the riddle?"

"I don't know, do you have a copy of Toon Link's chlamydia?"

"Hey!" Toon Link chucks a pillow at Ness, who laughs maniacally. He ducks behind me for protection, and I can't help but grin, glad that the mood is finally less heavy. It had been getting a bit too deep and dark, and a few too many of my jigsaw pieces had fallen out. Now they're coming back into place.

"Right then," Pit says, barely repressing a grin. "Let's hear the solution to the riddle."

I withdraw the tattered parchment with Porky's handwriting on it, stretching it out over the table. There are the codes - references to specific words within the texts. Villager does the honours, scouring the second line of the sixteenth page-

"The," he reads. "Insightful."

The pages are turned again, this time to very near the beginning. Toon Link looks over, pointing to a word.

"Train?"

Ness takes the reins for the final word, turning Crime and Punishment to its seventh page. There, the first word of the second line is-

"Station," I say. "The train station. It's where we have to look next."

"It's closed," Red grumbles. "The professors only let us in when it's time to go home."

"We'll break in," Toon Link says, standing. But he's interrupted by the Clocktower chiming. Lunch is over.

"Later," Pit decides. "Try to recruit a couple of people to fight with us during these lessons. We'll meet at 5:00, say, in here? Before Ness and Lucas see Byleth?"

"Maths," Ness complains. "It's a waste of time! It's the worst subject ever! We could be doing something useful, but nooo-"

"Maths is useful," Marth says sternly, overhearing as he leads us into the classroom. Ness scowls at his back, having not quite forgiven him for setting that fake competition.

"I'm surprised Porky kept it on the curriculum," Toon Link says, shrugging. "Oh look, there's Zelda, fancy recruiting her, Villager?"

"Shut up. Why don't you recruit Professor Marth?"

"If you're not careful, I will, and then who will you cry to when you're all alone?"

The pair bicker all the way to their seats and I laugh, but then I remember that Marth is presently not to be trusted in the slightest. Porky's blackmail had completely slipped my mind, what with everything else going on. That and Marth's alleged secret child…

I shake the theories from my mind. At least Marth has no ill intentions, and I suspect he wouldn't report us to Porky regardless of what he was asked to do. He's far too moral for that.

Even so, we'll need to be cautious.

Thunder growls overhead, sounding to me like an ominous warning for tomorrow's festivities. In the absence of a new collapse, the prom fever has slowly been trickling into the students throughout the morning. Villager spotted Link carrying an enormous envelope through the corridor, and I noticed several giggling girls holding flowers that look like they're from next to the lake. I wonder for a fleeting moment if Ness will get me some flowers, before chiding myself that no, that's silly. Of course we'll go together, but there are other things to have our minds on.

"I hate this," Ness moans at the blackboard of equations, burying his head in his hands.

"How's the hangover doing?"

"Better," Ness grumbles. "But not great. You'll need to give me loads of hugs…"

I gulp, making sure nobody overheard him. I worry about being flagrant with this relationship, even if I know it's what I want. There are still horror stories of homosexuals being executed, tortured, lynched. I couldn't let that happen to Ness.

"Hey," someone says behind me. I ignore them, trying to remember the quadratic formula. Is it 2a or 2c on the bottom? Or -2a perhaps, but then…

"Hey," the person says again. "Lucas, isn't it?"

I turn. The speaker is tall, dressed in a crisp white shirt tucked into baggy trousers. However, the giveaway is a pair of thick-lensed glasses and a massive sweep of blonde hair.

It's Ollie.

"What are you doing here?" I ask, raising my eyebrows. By Ollie's side is Angie, dressed in a full sunshine-yellow raincoat.

"Headmaster Hand sent us," Angie says cheerfully. "He thought it was no good us sitting around in the city, especially given the Tazmily forces are on their way."

"We've noticed everybody avoiding you," Ollie states, straightening his collar. "What has happened?"

"We'll tell you later," I decide, not particularly wanting to be psychoanalysed at this moment. "We're holding a meeting - people who want to stop Porky. Would you like to come along?"

"Sure," Angie says, quietening down when Marth drifts nearer. "Where is it?"

"Toon Link's dormitory."

"Oh, hey!" Ness looks around, his face the perfect image of surprise. "You were the smart ones, right? Do you know how to do these maths questions?"

"Why, certainly!" Ollie brightens up. "It all begins with completing the square…"

Throughout the lesson, Ollie's mathematical knowledge comes to surprisingly good use, and Marth hums his approval when he looks over our completed worksheets. Even more useful is the insider information from the city; Ollie tells us of Onett Power's increasing attacks, and that Everdred's bombing happened at the end of Headmaster Hand's court case. As it turns out, Headmaster Hand was imprisoned by the Onett police force for stealing Bowser's house (Ness laughs hysterically at this) and he remains in the Onett County Jail.

"The city itself is a state," Angie says grimly, returning from handing around a set of worksheets. "It's empty, mostly. The people have gone up to New Pork City in fear of the virus, and Onett losing the war. Onett Power has taken control of the majority of the First Residential District, after allying with a gang called the Sharks. Killings and brutalities are being committed almost every day. Only the key workers are keeping the industries alive."

"Children are going missing," Ollie adds. "All the kids on the street, the poor ones without a home, the orphans, they're disappearing like mad. We know they're not going up to New Pork because they can't afford a carriage, and we know they're not at work because the factories are in decline. Someone is taking them away."

"Porky?" Ness guesses, but Ollie frowns.

"We don't think so. What use would Porky have for a load of orphans?"

"Geldegarde?" I suggest; the hairs on the back of my neck raise at the thought. But, no, Geldegarde isn't powerful enough, that's not possible…

The clocktower chimes for the end of the lesson.

"By the way, Headmaster Hand sent for a magical object," Angie says, packing her books into a large leather satchel. "Professor Byleth wrote to say he saw you two burying it in the forest. He said it was too important to be left there unattended. It arrived just before we left."

My heart sinks with this unpleasant revelation. I knew we shouldn't have let it out of sight.

It's the third major fuck-up in less than a day.

I've lost the Psychic Stone.

"Claus? Claus?!"

I wrench apart the curtains in the Theatre room. The others follow me, Toon Link burrowed in the costume box, Villager looking through a series of prop battle-axes, Red and Pit scouring the stage.

"Where could he be?" I demand, rounding on Ness, who quickly backs away. "He must be in the school somewhere, I'd feel it if he wasn't-"

"He might not be!" Toon Link says, coming out of the box dressed as King Henry VII. "He could be anywhere! Down by the river, sitting in the forest, swimming in the lake…"

"He can't swim!" Red calls out, indignant. "And take off that ridiculous outfit!"

"Oi, I'm royalty! You will address me as such, you mere peasant!"

I wrench open the store cupboard, finding nothing inside. Even searching this room seems futile. Claus has never been interested in acting, and deep in my gut, I know there is nobody here.

"I'm sorry, Lucas," Ness says quietly, sensing my frustration.

"I'm such a rubbish brother." I cover my face with my hands, burning with shame. "How could I lose him? He needs me. He might not even survive on his own."

"Perhaps he's more capable than you think," Villager reasons, coming over and patting me on the back with a plastic sword. "He survived for ages in the wilderness after escaping from his cell. I bet he could take whatever Porky throws at him."

"I don't know. I hardly know anything about him anymore."

We give the theatre up as a lost cause. Feeling terrible, I head to my Politics class, which is made even worse by Ness leaving because he has a different professor. Thanks to my little detour, I'm ten minutes late, and Professor Sebastian Tute gives me a short telling-off before I take the last available seat… which is next to Ninten.

As if my mood could get any worse.

"As I was saying!" Sebastian Tute exclaims, shrilly. "Politics is just like music! Except, instead of woodwind competing with brass for attention, the left and the right compete for supremacy-"

"Hey," Ninten whispers. I grit my teeth. Be nice.

"Hey," I say, not looking at him.

"Look, uh, Lucas," Ninten fiddles with his bandanna, receiving a supportive nudge from Ana on his other side. "I wanted to say I'm sorry. I know you're not happy with me, I know you weren't happy that Ness got drunk last night, and I'm sorry that you had to deal with him…" he cuts himself off from his rambles, vaguely gesticulating. "What I'm trying to say is, are we cool?"

No, screw you, threatens to form on my lips, but I miraculously bite that back. "Yeah. Sure."

"Because, like-" Oh, great. He's not finished. "I really wanted to make sure, because I don't want you to think I'm taking Ness away, or anything, I mean, I'm straight! So-"

"Shush!" I exclaim, somehow drawing even more attention to myself than Ninten. "Sorry, uh. It's kind of a private thing, so…"

"Of course, of course!" Ninten says hurriedly, his face red with embarrassment. "Sorry, I'm really sorry. But, uhm, like, if you're ever uncomfortable with me being around Ness, or you think I'm acting out of line… you can let me know, yeah? I don't want to get in the way."

Of course he's really nice about it all. Excellent. He has to make it that much more difficult to dislike him.

"I'll let you know," I say, biting my lip. "Thanks."

"No worries," Ninten says, going for a smile. "And if there's anything I can do in the meantime…?"

"Don't let Ness get drunk again?" I suggest, and Ninten laughs.

"Sure. Works for me. Thanks for being understanding, Lucas. I really appreciate it."

"No problem," I lie.

With the air somewhat cleared, I don't feel quite as tense, and I tune out Sebastian Tute's rambles about the musical nature of the Communist Manifesto. Ninten isn't outwardly a bad guy, but perhaps that's the entire problem I have with him. He's too nice, too amicable, in many ways the entire antithesis to everything that I am. It bothers me when Ness talks so highly of him, and yes, I envy him. I have no trouble admitting that. But it's impossible not to, when he talks so easily, expresses himself so well, and even more irritatingly, looks good in a postman's cap.

"He's like my brother," Ness says later on, when I'm expressing my frustrations on the way down to Art. "Also, don't worry. He's not my type. My type is small, skinny blondes."

I rub my neck, confused. "How can he be like a brother? You only just met him."

"I don't know," Ness shrugs cheerfully. "It's just how it is, I guess. He's cool, though. I don't know why you don't like him."

"Because I don't trust him," I say darkly, standing aside to let a frantic Wii Fit Trainer pass. I wince as his bag of hockey sticks swings into my side. "I think he could be up to something suspicious."

Ness laughs. "He's magic, like us! Have you ever heard of a bad magician?"

"Uh, yes? Have you ever read a fairy tale?"

"Well…" Ness tries to come up with a clever refute. "They're not real, you goof."

"You're the goof."

"No, you!"

Somehow, talking with Ness alleviates my worries, and I feel significantly better when Shulk leads us into the classroom. It feels weirdly nostalgic today, and I'm looking forward to completing a painting for the first time in a while.

Even if it may be my last.

"Good afternoon!" Shulk exclaims breezily, brandishing a handful of fresh-printed newspapers. "Since these times are looking bleak, I have decided that instead of creating artworks based on war, we will today be creating artworks based on love! I know that many have been asking their paramours to prom, and I truly believe that expressing all of this love through the medium of art would benefit us all. From these headlines, extrapolate the joy amongst the sadness, the light amidst the shadow, the merriment amongst the-"

Ana clears her throat.

"Ah, sorry," Shulk smiles. "I do talk a lot, don't I? Off you go! Good luck with your art!"

The familiar scraping of stools rings out as soon as Shulk has finished talking, students hurrying to get the best set of brushes.

"I'm going to paint you," Ness declares, withdrawing a particularly large canvas from the shelf.

"Really?" I unfurl my easel, being careful not to hit anyone in the shins with its mighty legs. "That's sappy, why'd you want to do that?"

"Well, Shulk said to paint things we love, and I love you-"

I roll my eyes, but my cheeks are reddening. "Good luck. I'm sure my radiance will practically jump out of the page."

"Of course. If I paint you too accurately, the image might come to life and replace you."

"Maybe I should paint you too. Then our paint-selves can live in eternal harmony-"

"You already did that," Ness reminds me, and I blush. I'd forgotten that I painted us during his coma.

I slather a background of yellow onto my canvas in lieu of embarrassing myself further. I want to paint Claus, but he's too far away for me to get a grip on him. My subconscious isn't telling me that anything bad has happened, or that there is danger, but that doesn't stop me worrying like a frantic goose.

Fortunately, I have a better idea.

When I was little, Mother would always tell me that I was going to grow up to be kind, just like my grandfather. Mother valued kindness above all else, pursuing justice and morality in our household, teaching us to give and not receive. It was for this reason that I loved Christmas so much; it meant I could give people presents.

Walking the snowy Tazmily market with my pocket money in hand was the best feeling ever. Market stalls called to me like birds, adorned with twisting holly and crimson berries, full of wonderful things that I could give. A quaint wooden toy for Claus. A colourful bowl of fruit for Father. Even a jar of fancy coffee beans, which I remember purchasing for Grandad Alec on one occasion.

I saved my favourite presents for Mother. Every year, I painted something different; a little pot plant, a happy little elf, a basket of many flowers, and then I wrapped my artworks up and put them under the tree. I knew those sorts of presents were Mother's favourites, because she smiled when they were opened, hugged me tight, and promised that she'd keep them safe.

She always did. Sometimes I'd catch her looking through the paintings on a warm summer's evening, smiling to herself, and when she saw me, she'd bring me into a hug and tell me what a good boy I was. How kind I would grow up to be.

I was well looked after as a child, blessed with more love than I knew what to do with.

Perhaps that's why I never turned bitter after everything went wrong. Thanks to Ness's affections, I've never borne the weight of a day without love. Thanks to Mother's warmth, I was built on firm foundations, a solid rock upon which to set my morals. That's why I'm going to find Claus.

Because he's got eight years of love to catch up on.

"That's a pretty painting," Ness says, coming over to observe my work. "Is that you when you were little?"

"Yeah, and that's Claus," I point to an orange bundle of hair sticking out of a pile of blankets, "And that's Mother," I point to a figure amongst the sunflowers.

"You were a cute kid. What happened to you?"

"Hey!" I complain, and Ness grins, slinging an arm around me.

"Have you seen Nana's picture? I don't think she's in a very good mood…"

I look over. Instead of her usual standard of a colourful array of fruit and vegetables, today Nana's canvas is painted completely black. Not a shred of light illuminates it.

"Looks like she didn't take your rejection well," Ness says, with a laugh. "She's gone all edgy."

"But that was more than a week ago," I frown, concerned. Even if I don't like her like that, she's still a nice enough person. "Do you really think that's the issue?"

"I dunno, if I got turned down someone as amazing as you, I don't think I'd be happy for years-"

"I'm going to talk to her," I decide. "Don't destroy anything while I'm gone."

"No promises!"

Rolling my eyes, I approach Nana and her midnight canvas. In retrospect, perhaps I should've spoken to her sooner, considering her brother started glowing purple and collapsed in view of the entire school. But, as seems to be the constant theme of today, I can't do everything at once.

"Hey," I begin, tentatively. Nana turns, looking glassy.

"Hey."

"Are you, uh. Okay?"

"Yes," Nana says, matter-of-factly. She forces a smile. "Thank you for asking."

"Are you sure?" I eye the painting. On her brush, there is only black paint. "That doesn't look like something you love."

"Yes, I am sure," Nana says robotically. "I am painting the darkness."

"You, um, love the darkness?"

"Yes." Nana turns back to her work, layering further layers of black paint upon the canvas. I look back to Ness, desperate, but he only shrugs.

"Well, uh, if you're sure, I'll be off, then," I say, feeling foolish. "If you need anything, erm, you can let me know, okay?"

"Okay," she says stiffly.

I move to leave, but Ness gives me a pointed look, and I remember what Pit asked us to do.

"By the way, a group of us are meeting later, to figure out what happened to your brother…"

Nana's ears prick up, and her eyes meet mine, glinting with something unfamiliar.

"I'll be there."

"Come on, it wasn't that bad!" Ness protests, as we make our way towards Toon Link's dorm, the site for our meeting. "I thought I captured your likeness quite well."

"You painted me with three eyes, Ness."

"Well, hey! I'm an abstract artist! What did you expect?"

"Not to be depicted as a biblically accurate angel?

Ness snorts with laughter, pushing through Toon Link's door. To my surprise, there is quite a substantial gathering within, and nerves swell in my throat. I hate public speaking, let alone when it's public speaking to convince everyone that Porky Minch is evil and magic is real. What am I even going to say?

Toon Link hails us as we come in, Pit smiling ruefully near the front. Ness seems a lot more at ease than me, but perhaps that's because Ninten's at the back of the room, Ana on one side, his vacant-looking friend Lloyd on the other. Bayonetta makes most of the noise, ignoring Samus on her left and instead talking merrily to a confused Paula, who looks as if she's not entirely sure what she's doing. She smiles at Ness, though, and gives him a small wave.

There are others, too. Ollie and Angie are sitting behind Jeff and Tony, the latter of which is spinning his hat in his hands. A boy who I faintly recognise as Mii shoots Ana several repeated glances, whilst Nana watches the scene play out with a blank expression. Even Hop and Victor are here, looking a little bit out of place among the older faces.

"I practically had to drag beta boy along," Toon Link whispers, and with a shock I spot Link stepping into the room, Zelda with him, looking tired. "He owes me a favour, though, and the prospect of a duel excited him."

"I hope they don't duel in here," Villager wrings his hands, looking uncharacteristically tense. "I'm not sure if this was such a great idea, Pit-"

"We need the numbers," Pit says firmly. "We have to beat Porky, no two ways about it. This is our best chance."

Villager gives Toon Link a Pit's getting militant again look, but he doesn't say anything more. Instead, he makes room for the last few late arrivals to sit down on Toon Link's bed, most of whom I don't know by name, but who I recognise as various acquaintances of Villager and Red.

Pit stands.

"Well! Good afternoon, everybody, it's nice to-"

"Where's the chocolate?" A particularly large-looking individual demands, as if expecting his wishes to be met at once.

Pit sighs, bringing out several bars of chocolate, doling them out to all of the guests. "I had to bribe some of them," he says, under my inquisitive gaze. The idea doesn't fill me with much hope.

"Is that good enough, Morton?" Pit asks, drily. The large boy licks his chocolate-covered lips, looking like a kid in a candy store.

"Definitely."

"Anyway," Pit continues. "As you all know, Porky has been reigning havoc — yes, Bayonetta?"

"I was promised heroin," Bayonetta sulks. "Not chocolate."

"We talked about this," Paula tries to say, but Bayonetta waves her off, looking insistent. I half expect Pit to procure a vial of the stuff, but thankfully he doesn't.

"You must have misheard. Anyway, so, Porky's been causing a lot of problems, right? So-"

There's a knock at the door. I look at it in trepidation, half expecting Porky to come bursting in, but when the door is opened, there are two people I don't recognise.

"Nichol! Richie!" Toon Link exclaims, keenly, but I'm not listening. I'm more distracted by the person walking in behind them.

"Claus!" I shout, relief washing over me, and the redhead's face lights up. He hurries over, and I pull him into a big hug.

"Where have you been? Claus, I was worried sick-"

"Friends!" Claus says happily. "They're from Tazmily!"

"Friends? Who, Nichol and Richie?"

Claus nods, smiling broadly. Nichol claps him on the back, wearing a sharp bow tie.

"That's right! Lucas, ain't it? My sister and I lived in Tazmily-"

"-Before we moved to Onett," Richie says pleasantly. "Of course, we recognised Claus right away!"

Pit clears his throat, and we all turn back to the front, my heart feeling considerably fuller than it did a few minutes ago. He's made friends. It's like having the old social-butterfly Claus back again.

"For those of you who don't know," says Pit, "I had a twin brother. Dark Pit. Before the Wilderness Survival Week, Porky lured me and him into catacombs under the school - the very same ones that Wario was rumoured to be using when we all suspected him of kidnapping students. Dark Pit was taken away from me, and killed without mercy, without honour, without anyone to hear him scream. You see, Porky Minch was behind everything that happened, taking whoever he wished, under the mask of Headmaster Hand. Now, Porky is our headmaster, and he's inflicting more suffering than ever before, which is why we have to stop him!"

Pit finishes dramatically, surveying his audience. Even Link's eyes are wide, absorbing the new information placed in front of him.

"How do you expect to do that?" Jeff asks warily, having polished off his bar of chocolate. "You told me yourself, Porky is strong, he's powerful-"

"Hold up! Porky's evil?" Bayonetta withdraws a pistol from her top, holding it in the air. "No wonder he's been curfewing us! I swear, I'll blast that arse to pieces-"

"Yeah!" Ninten nods enthusiastically. "But, perhaps with less arse explosion."

"There are quite a few of us," Pit continues, "Which is just as well. We have reason to suspect that Porky means to cause chaos with his prom tomorrow."

"What?!" Bayonetta exclaims loudly. "You mean, I purchased that bouquet for nothing?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Well!" Bayonetta withdraws a vast array of plants, ranging from tulips to daffodils to a few sprigs of stinging nettles. "This is for you, Paula! I was going to ask you to prom later on, but it seems the time has come early!"

"Oh!" Paula gathers the bouquet, rather flustered. "How lovely! What is a prom? We don't have them in Twoson..."

"It's a kind of formal dance," Richie explains. "We used to have them all the time in Tazmily."

"Tazmily?" Morton roars, pointing a massive finger. "The enemy!"

"Hey!" Toon Link stands. "Don't be racist!"

"Their troops are destroying our city!"

"Enough!" Pit exclaims, now brandishing a particularly large sheet of parchment paper. "Porky's prom isn't the only issue we have to contend with. As you all know, some people have been emitting a purple light, before subsequently collapsing. We're not entirely certain if Porky is behind this or not, but what we are certain of, is that action needs to be taken."

I feel a few sets of eyes flickering towards me, and Villager stands up.

"I just wanted to say," he says, his voice shaking a little. "I know that some people suspect Lucas and Ness here of causing these collapses, but I want to say that that's an utterly ridiculous thought. Mega Man was my friend and theirs, and I know they'd never want to hurt him."

"But they're gay!" Morton exclaims. Toon Link shoots him a withering look.

"Do you plan to offend every single minority here tonight?"

"Yes! As a matter of fact, I can't stand people with glasses. It makes their eyes look so massive, you know? Like frogs. People with glasses are frogs."

"I am not a frog!" Ollie contests hotly. "That is a foolish notion!"

"Quite preposterous!" Red agrees, and the two share an appreciative glance.

"Villager's right," Pit says, nodding in our direction. "Whoever's causing the collapses, I am certain they are not in this room. Now, onto the matter of tomorrow, Porky has left us a riddle-"

Mii snorts. "A riddle? What is this, primary school?"

"What you have to understand about Porky," Pit says evenly, "Is that he is very confident in his plans. He would like nothing more than to give us clues, to give us as much help as we can, so he can boast. Something about his plans concern Ness and Lucas here, as if the most important thing to him is to make them abide by his will."

"It's true," Ness says. "He thinks he can't be beaten. He's planning something tomorrow, and it's going to be big. We're going to need all the help we can get."

"But what help can we give?" Samus asks doubtfully, a few others nodding and humming their agreement.

"Fighting, mostly," Pit says, and Link cheers, suddenly bursting into action.

"Joyous times! I shall slay the Pork Man myself!"

"I don't think so!" Bayonetta whips out her pistol again. "A couple of shots with this bad boy…"

"Why do you have a gun, Bayonetta?" Ana asks, shrinking away from the weapon, which is being waved around without much caution.

"Ah, it's for the heroin junkies! Some of them are wild, y'know? They'll do anything for a fix…"

"Violence is never the answer," Red frowns.

"Violence is the question," Link says, cracking his knuckles. "The answer is yes!"

"How are we supposed to fight?" Jeff asks, looking dubious. "You told me about those things - the Future Humans - are we going to be fighting them?"

"Possibly," Pit says grimly. "Either way, there isn't any obligation for anyone to fight, or to help out at all. It's a dangerous business, and if you'd rather stay away, that's completely understandable."

"Nah, we'll fight!" Ninten calls from the back, sitting up a little straighter. "Porky's caused a lot of harm to a lot of people, and I say if he means to continue, then we should stop him!"

I shift a little, discomforted by the enthusiasm. I'm not entirely sure if some of these people understand exactly what is being asked of them.

"We'd lose." Ollie looks around worriedly at us, meeting my eyes. "We're not strong enough, are we? What chance do we have?"

"Well," Toon Link grins, before Pit can answer. "That's where our secret weapon comes in. Ness, and Lucas, would you care to demonstrate?"

Pit nods his approval, and nervously, I move to the front, following Ness's lead.

"We're magicians," Ness declares, rather bluntly. There are muted gasps of surprise, all across the room. Tony drops his chocolate on the floor, stunned into silence. Little Mac hides a noise of surprise with a cough.

"Magic is illegal!" Morton shouts, standing up and pointing at our heads. "You know, I really hate magicians, all coming into this city, taking our jobs-"

"It's true," I say, willing my voice to stay balanced. "And amongst our magical powers are tools we can use in battle."

"Prove it," Richie says predictably, staring fixedly at my hands. "Show us some magic."

Ness raises his arms. "You might want to shield your eyes."

"PK THUNDER!"

The effect is immediate. Several people scream, as a roar of thunder tears through the room and all at once, a blinding light dashes into the window. Glass shatters. Cold winds rush in.

Ness rubs his face, sheepishly. "That was more powerful than I expected."

"My room!" Toon Link exclaims, shivering from the invading winter's night. "My poor room!"

"The glass broke from inside," Ollie observes. "The shards went outside. Impressive."

Pit clears his throat, taking back the attention of the audience. I sit back down next to Claus, feeling rather awkward, and altogether cold. Ness wraps me in a hug.

"So, yeah," Pit says. "We've got magic. Which means that-"

But whatever it means, we do not find out. From next to Ninten, Lloyd staggers to his feet, his legs shaking, his arms spasming like they've been shot.

"Four," he rasps.

Purple light erupts from his face.


A/N

There's a lot to cover in these author's notes, so I'll keep this brief. I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Much to digest, I suspect. A lot happened…

There is now a discord server for writers and readers of Mother/Earthbound fanfiction! It is owned by RainyTazmily, author of Through Thick and Thin (which, let's face it, if you're here, you've probably read). Here's the server code:

eGAZZmsfdf

Members include several well-known authors, such as A Polar Bear, Lottery57 and even little old me :DD

Furthermore, progress on renovating earlier chapters is going well. Since posting chapter 56, I've finished renovating all the way up to 20, and I'm halfway through 21. I've also posted a Christmassy Mother/Smash Bros one-shot which you can find on my profile :))

Notes

Nichol and Richie are canon Tazmily villagers. On this occasion, I've moved them to Onett.

Thank you so much for reading this chapter! Hope to see you again soon,

~ ReadyForTeddy