The night ambled along, its stride not broken by the memories and truths that had been unlocked within the trust and safety of brotherhood.


Steve turned over on his side, his eyes opening slightly, before he mumbled to himself. "Who the hell turned on the lamp?" He opened his eyes all the way, yawning, as he saw Soda sleeping in the recliner that wasn't far from the couch he currently occupied. "What are you doing out here, man?" Steve's eyes drifted closed again, slumber reclaiming him, before his thoughts could venture any further.

"Don't. Please just go."

Steve heard Soda's voice and forced his eyes back open to see his best friend.

"No. Don't shoot me. Please don't."

Steve sat up then, watching Soda move from one side of the recliner to the other, before he curled up on it, hiding himself from the threat that existed within his dream state.

"Please help me. It won't stop. I need help."

Steve, despite his drowsiness, lifted himself off the couch and went over to Soda. He could see the distressed expression on his friend's face, as his voice still whimpered pleas. He kneeled down next to the recliner, a gentle hand on his back, as he spoke gently. "It's okay, buddy. It's just a dream."

Soda pressed himself into the back of the recliner, his hands gripping it. "It hurts. He shot me!"

Steve stood and moved to the arm of the recliner, leaning close to Soda's face. "Wake up, man. You're dreaming. It's over."

Soda's eyes opened, his gaze locking with Steve's.

"You're okay, I promise. You're safe, buddy."

Soda felt his body begin to relax and reached for the blanket he'd kicked off of himself. "Sorry I woke you up."

Steve watched as Soda adjusted himself and stretched his legs out on the foot rest. "It's okay. Why are you sleeping in here?"

"I do that sometimes, if I keep waking up a lot. I'll move around and stay awake for a little while, then sleep somewhere else."

"Did you turn on the lamp cause of the nightmares?"

"Yeah. It's like I'm a little kid afraid of the dark."

Steve made his way back to the couch, stretching out on it. "It makes sense though, man. You know I'm not exactly a huge fan of the dark myself."

"You can turn it off if you want."

Steve looked at the lamp, then at Soda, who seemed to be drifting back to sleep, before closing his eyes himself. "Nah. It ain't bothering me. We can leave it on." If a little light helps you, he thought. There's no way I would turn it off.


Light shone through at the break of dawn, as not a single burden was left to be beared alone.


"Those two probably stayed up half the night."

Darry nodded in agreement with Pony's comment, as he looked at the two sleeping teenage boys in his living room. "Yeah, they probably did. But I'm sure they had a lot to talk about too."

Pony poured milk into his bowl of Apple Jacks, as he eyed his middle brother. Soda was curled up in the recliner, his head pressed into the arm of it, a blanket covering his legs and feet. "He must've been tired to sleep there."

Darry poured coffee into a mug, before setting the pot back in its place. He sipped the hot black liquid, the bitterness helping him wake up. "He's out, so he must need it too."

Pony's gaze drifted over to Steve, who slept on the couch. He lie flat on his back, his mouth partially open, a blanket draped over his middle. "Steve's out of it too. You know what, Dar? He's not so bad at all. I'm sorry I ever believed he was or thought I didn't like him."

"You guys just didn't always get along, Pone. That's all. But I think you two have always wanted the same thing."

"I mean, I never thought Steve was really a bad guy or anything. He's Soda's best friend, so that couldn't be. But talking to him lately, I guess I understand him better. He's honestly good to talk to about stuff." Pony used his spoon to stir his cereal, red and green loops swirling along in the milk, as he scooped up a bite. "And I sure never saw that coming."


"Hey, wake up, buddy."

Soda hardly stirred a the sound of Steve's voice, sleep still keeping its grip on him.

Steve sighed and lifted the blanket off of Soda, drawing it up to tuck it around his shoulders.

Soda's eyes blinked open to slits, seeing Steve in front of him. "Hey, man."

Steve watched his best friend's eyes shut again. "Hey. Sorry, man. I'll leave you alone. It's just I have to go soon, and I wanted to check on you."

"I'm okay, Stevie. Just tired."

Steve perched on the arm of the recliner, opposite of where Soda lie. "All right, man. I just wanted to see cause we talked about so much last night."

"Yeah. It was a lot."

Steve touched the blanket that covered Soda, rubbing his shoulder through the material. "I guess what I'm trying to say is I want to make sure you're not too overwhelmed."

"Hmm...I don't think I am."

"Okay." Steve stared at Soda, everything they'd both spoken the night before weighing on him, though he was without words at the moment.

"You have to go to work in a little while?"

"Yeah. So I've got a few things to do first."

"Okay."

Steve squeezed Soda's shoulder, then leaned down and kissed the side of his head. "Get some rest, brother. I'll see you later."


"Hey, Son, I'm going to see Audrey for a few minutes. But I'll be back before you have to head to work."

Steve chuckled at Nicholas' declaration. "Yeah, right, Dad. No way I'll see you again that soon if you're with her."

Nicholas finished tying his shoe, then picked up the keys to his car. "Well, she's working today, but I thought I'd stop by and bring her some flowers and- I can't believe I just told you that."

"Told me what? That you're bringing her flowers? I think it's sweet, Dad."

"And here I thought you'd make fun of me for that."

"Oh. I will later. Just not right now."

"Hey, how'd it go at Sodapop's last night? I meant to ask sooner?"

"He talked a lot. He told me everything about the night of the shooting and even more besides that. We talked for a long time."

"That's good. I know that must help him to share it."

"I told him about how I've felt guilty too. I mean earlier, before I even came home to get my stuff to stay the night. But we talked about it some more later. Soda said he doesn't want me hurting over this, and he's thankful I wasn't there."

"That must help you too, Son."

"Yeah, it actually does. Especially when he told me to hang onto what he said. He doesn't want me thinking I wasn't there for him or that I let him down."

Nicholas got to his feet, keys in hand, as he touched Steve's shoulder. "That's cause you didn't, Son, and you are there for him. You're both there for each other."


"Aw, they're beautiful, Nicholas. I love them."

Nicholas handed Audrey the bouquet of a dozen red roses, watching as she admired them. "I just wanted you to know I was thinking of you."

Audrey held the roses close to her face, breathing in their sweet scent. "Thank you so much."

Nicholas took the seat across from Audrey, looking around the bookstore, where she worked. "I've only been in here a few times before."

Audrey set the bouquet carefully down on the table, where she'd recently eaten her lunch. "I've always loved books, so it's nice to be around them all the time. I like it."

Nicholas looked at the shelves of books, noticing the labeled sections held everything from biographies to mysteries and romance. "I really like being around you all the time."

"I feel the same way about you." Audrey touched the petals of one of the roses, the velvety texture brushing her fingers. "In fact, even though it's so soon for me to say this, I love you."


"I was tired, Dar. I kept dreaming, and me and Steve talked about everything last night. It took a lot out of me."

Darry watched, as Soda made himself a peanut butter sandwich, noticing when he moved the knife from his right hand to his left, though he didn't comment on it. "I hope that's a good thing, little buddy."

Soda put the lid back on the jar of peanut butter, leaving it out on the counter. "It is. I guess so anyway. It's not like I feel great or anything, but getting all that out, saying it outloud, it felt kinda good. Once I really started talking, I thought I'd never stop."

"I'm glad, Pepsi Cola."

Soda took a bite of his sandwich, chewing for a few moments. "Hey, Darry?"

"Yeah?"

"I know you wanted me to talk to you, and I will. I'm not trying to keep stuff from you or anything like that."

"That's not what I think at all, Sodapop."

"It's just... Because there are things I know Steve understands, but not that I think you wouldn't or-"

"It's fine, little buddy. I already know, and I can see why you'd talk to Steve. You don't have to explain."

"But I still just want you to know I'm going to tell you more too, Dar. I promise."


"You did come back soon, Dad."

Nicholas dropped into a chair in the kitchen, a mixture of joy and fear overwhelming his senses, as he looked at Steve, who was clad in his DX uniform. "Yeah, I guess I did."

Steve stared at Nicholas, noticing the stricken expression on his face. "Did something happen?"

"Audrey said she loves me."

"Oh. You look like you're in shock, Dad. Are you okay?"

"I don't know. I mean, I'm happy. She makes me happy."

"Yeah. I've sure been able to see that."

"I told her I love her on the phone a couple of days ago. I just said it without even thinking."

"Probably cause it's true."

"But we just started seeing each other."

"That doesn't mean it can't be true." Steve scooted a chair over and sat down close to Nicholas. "Dad, I know I tease you a lot about Audrey, but I want to tell you something important right now. Not just about her, but about you."

"Okay, Son."

"I don't know if this is going to sound weird or not, but I'm just going to say it. Me and you, we've done a lot of talking about how we feel and stuff like that, right?"

"Yeah. Sure."

"Dad, when you say something to me, when you tell me anything, I always know you mean it. No matter what, everything comes from your heart. So when you talk about Audrey, and you get that look on your face or when you're with her and you smile, it's real."

"Of course it is."

"So when you say you love her, I know that must be real too. Everything about you is so genuine, Dad. I see that, no matter what we're doing or talking about, even when it's hard. I feel like I could go on and on about it too cause it helps me a lot. I mean, I've not even sure how to explain it, except to say you make me feel safe."

Nicholas met Steve's eyes, at a momentary loss for words, even as a feeling of warmth spread throughout his heart. "Son, you have no idea how much it means to me to hear that. All of it."

"It's true. So yeah, it is soon for you to say you love Audrey, but I know you must mean it cause you wouldn't say it if it didn't come straight from your heart."


Penny's fingers touched the heart shaped gold locket that hung around her neck. "So you go for the tests on Wednesday?"

Soda picked up a small rock and threw it into the lake that stretched out in front of them, making the water ripple. "Yeah. Maybe after that, my doctor can do something to help."

"I'm sure he can."

Soda felt the wind blow, as he lie back on the grass, hands resting behind his head. "I don't know. I'm kind of nervous about it cause what if he gives me medicine or something, and it still doesn't get better?"

Penny lie down beside Soda, her elbow propping her up, the heart shaped locket dangling just above the grass. "From what you've told me about your doctor, he sounds like he knows what he's doing and like he's seen all of this before."

"Yeah. I guess it's just scary, on top of everything else, to have something wrong that might not ever go away. There's so much already bothering me, and it's a lot harder to deal with it when I never can forget what happened. Besides, it's not like I'm good at a lot, you know?"

"What are you talking about?"

Soda stared at the sky above him, the clouds still within the backdrop of blue lit up by the sun. "I mean, I'm good with cars and stuff like that. But not anything else, and it's going to be hard for me if I can't hold onto stuff, or if my hand and fingers hurt."

"Not anything else, huh? Sodapop, that's not true."

"Sure it is. I ain't smart like Pony or Darry. I don't understand things the way they do. That's why I was okay with dropping out of school to help out. Not like it would matter."

"Please don't say that. You are smart. Grades and books don't mean everything. I couldn't fix a car or anything like that, and you know what you're the best with?"

"What?"

"People. Listening. Being understanding."

"That's not so hard."

"Because it comes naturally to you. That's one reason your brothers and your friends love you so much. Besides, you're not only good at your job because you know how to fix cars. You do other things too."

"Yeah. Like pumping gas and changing oil and stuff like that. It doesn't take a lot of smarts to clean a windshield."

"No, I mean you're there with customers, with people, and they like you. Your boss likes you. Steve and your other coworkers like working with you. You know why that is?"

"Well, Coleman's a good guy. He's nice to everyone, and Steve is my best friend."

"Of course, but it's also because you work hard, and you do whatever's needed."

"That's cause it's my job."

"Sure. But why do you think Mr. Coleman is willing to help you if you need it and be flexible?"

"Cause he feels bad I got shot on the clock."

"Even so. You're a good worker, Sodapop. He doesn't want to let you go, even if some things might be different now."

"When I told him I might have nerve damage, I was so afraid of what he would say to me. I mean, it's not like I can't do my job at all, but still."

Penny put her hand on Soda's cheek, seeing his eyes that held within them a layer of discouragement she hoped to soothe. "I think Mr. Coleman knows what we all know."

"What's that?"

Penny held Soda's gaze, their eyes locked together in the harmony of truths that was reverberating across the pages of his life. "That you can't be replaced."


Steve's feet moved across the floor of the DX, just as his last customer made her way out the door. He heard the sound of the phone ringing, followed by Mr. Coleman's typical cheerful greeting, as he reshelved the magazines, restoring their order.

"Sodapop? Are you okay?"

Steve turned to look at Mr. Coleman, both the tone of his voice and the apparent caller startling him from his work routine.

"Yeah. Just hang on a minute. He's right here."

Steve went back across the station, taking the phone receiver that Mr. Coleman held out to him and pressing it to his ear. "Soda? Is something wrong?"

Soda's voice came over the line, the sound sending a shiver up Steve's spine. "I'm sorry, Stevie. I know you're at work, but something's not right."

"What do you mean?"

"It won't stop. I can't get it to stop."

"You can't get what to stop, buddy? What's happening?"

"I feel funny, and I can't stop shaking all over."

"Where's Darry?"

"I-I don't know. Not here. No one's here. I'm alone. I'm all alone."

"Just hang on, buddy, and tell me what's going on."

"It hurts, Stevie. I can't stop it."

"What hurts, Soda? What do you mean?"

Mr. Coleman went over to Steve, meeting his eyes with his own. "Steve. Go. Just go check on him."

Steve nodded at his boss, as he spoke into the phone. "Soda, I'm coming over there, okay? I'll see you in a few minutes."


It's not real. There's nothing here.

Please don't. Please don't shoot me. I'm trying to get the money.

But it is real.

I'm not here. This can't be happening. It hurts. I'm bleeding everywhere. Please don't come back.

My chest hurts. I can't breathe.

He's here. It's here. It's always with me.


Steve pushed open the door to the Curtis' house and stepped inside, his voice low, as he called for his best friend. "Hey, Sodapop? Where are you, man?" He wandered farther inside, going into the living room to find Soda on the floor, legs curled underneath him, as he huddled close to the wall, arms covering his head that was pressed into the carpet.

Steve drew nearer, dropping down beside Soda. He could see him visibly trembling, as he put a hesitant hand on his back. "Hey, buddy. I promise you're okay." When Soda didn't respond, Steve leaned closer, able to see the sweat on his best friend's head and hear his harsh breathing. "It's all right, Sodapop. It's just me. I'd never hurt you." Remembering what Soda had previously done to his stitches, Steve moved to his right side. He saw that the bandage was wrapped around the wound, though the fingers of his left hand were moving over the material, as if on the border of temptation. "Be careful, buddy. I don't want you to hurt anything." With those words, Steve reached for Soda's hand, feeling the clamminess, as he held it in his own.

Soda's voice found its way out of his self-imposed shelter. "My chest hurts, and it feels like- it feels like I can't breathe right either. I keep- I keep seeing it. The mask. I hear it. His voice."

"I'm sorry, man. So sorry."

"Not better. It's worse. Sorry I called. Pulled you away from work."

Steve saw the phone on the floor, not far from Soda, anything but regretful that his friend had the presence of mind to call the DX, to call anyone at all. "It's fine, man. I think Mr. Coleman heard the way you sounded, and he told me to go."

"Scared, Stevie. Still so scared."

Steve let go of Soda's hand, keeping an eye on it, as he touched the back of his friend's head. He could still see Soda shaking, his eyes peeking out at him from beneath his arms, at the same time he nudged his shoulder. "Hey, sit up, man."

Soda slowly lifted his head, then felt himself being wrapped in an embrace.

Steve held his best friend, unsurprised when Soda leaned heavily against him.

"I don't know why. Nothing happened. I was just here and..."

Steve rested his head against Soda's, his eyes closing, as he rocked back and forth. "I know, buddy."

"It hurts. It always hurts."

"You're going to get through it, man. Like I keep telling you."

"I felt like I was dying. Still kind of do."

"I think you have some really damn bad anxiety right now, buddy."

"I don't feel good at all."

"You're going to calm down soon. It'll all pass."

Soda pushed himself further into the hug, his grip on Steve getting tighter. "I can't stop shaking."

"It's going to go away, buddy. I swear."

"Felt like I was having a heart attack."

The front door opened, followed by the sound of Darry's voice. "Hey, Pone, help me bring all these in."

Steve craned his neck, seeing Darry set paper sacks of groceries down on the counter. "Hey, Superman, come in here."

Darry heard Steve's voice and came into the living room. Staring at the sight in front of him, he crouched down and touched his middle brother's back. "What happened? Are you okay, little buddy?"

Soda turned his head to see his big brother. "Don't know, Dar. I don't think so."

Darry stayed in his place, as he looked at Steve. "Weren't you at work?"

Steve nodded, able to feel that Soda wasn't shaking as much, though he didn't let him go just yet. "Yeah. He called the DX. He didn't sound good, so Coleman let me come check on him."

Soda loosened his grip on Steve, his body beginning to relax, as his anxiety lessened. "I can breathe better now. Chest not hurting so much."

Pony appeared at the edge of the living room, sacks of groceries in his arms. "Hey, Dar, where-"He stopped, taking in Soda's current state, as he pulled away from Steve. "What's wrong?"

Soda remained on the floor, as he looked up at Pony. "I'm all right now, little brother. Just got real anxious and stuff like that."

Pony turned to put the bags down, before going over to his middle brother. "You don't look all right at all."

Darry studied Soda's face, as he stroked his hair, seeing his distraught expression that was as obvious as the clamminess of his forehead. "You're pretty warm too, Sodapop."

Soda leaned on Steve's shoulder, lifting himself to his feet. "I'm okay now, Dar. Believe me. I was worse."

Steve stood up too, watching Soda, able to see the shakiness that hadn't completely dissipated. 'You should sit down, man."

Darry wrapped his arm around Soda's waist, leading him over to the couch. "Steve's right. Pony too."

Soda sat down on the couch, hand on his chest, as he took in a deep breath and held it for a few seconds, before exhaling. He looked over at Pony, seeing him sit down on the arm of the sofa. "See? I'm better now. Nothing is happening to me anymore."

Pony stared at Soda, shaking his head, as an unexpected wave of anger rose. "Stop it, Soda. Stop lying. You're always trying to make it sound like you're fine when you know damn well-"

Steve put a hand on Pony's shoulder, his touch gentler than his voice. "Cut it out, Kid. He doesn't need you yelling at him right now."

Pony started to protest, shrugging off Steve's hand. "Well, it's true. He's always telling me he's okay like I can't see any different."

Darry stepped in then, the pained look on Soda's face and his lack of reply spurring him on. "Ponyboy, this really isn't the time. We can talk later, but if you can't wait, just go to your room."

Pony huffed out a breath, before turning away from Steve and his brothers. He didn't utter another word, as he stalked off to his bedroom.

Soda watched his little brother walk away, hearing the expected slam of his door. "I really didn't mean- I just-"

Darry could see the tears in Soda's eyes, as he laid his arm across his shoulders. "Don't worry about it right now, Pepsi Cola. I'll talk to him later."

Steve looked toward the hallway, where Pony had gone, before returning his focus to his best friend. "Yeah, buddy. You just try to relax. I'm going to head back to work. But I'll be over here after my shift is over."

Soda's gaze moved to Steve, as he pushed back the tears that were wanting to fall in response to even more than his little brother's words. "Okay, Stevie. Thank you for coming. Tell Mr. Coleman too. But make sure he knows I'm feeling better now."

Steve gave Soda's shoulder a squeeze, as he started to leave. "Of course, buddy. I'll tell him."

Darry met Steve's eyes in an unspoken question.

Steve paused, reading the oldest Curtis' concern in his expression, as he mouthed a silent reply: "We'll talk later."

Darry nodded in confirmation, as Steve made his way out of the house, leaving just himself and Soda in the living room. "Are you sure you're feeling better? You look like you need to lie down."

Soda felt Darry's hand press against his forehead. "I ain't running a fever, Dar."

"Just checking, little buddy."

"I got all sweaty, but not from anything like that. Just from being so scared."

"Okay."

Soda lie down, putting his head in Darry's lap. "Please stay with me."

Darry looked down at his little brother, his reply an echo of a past promise. "Of course, Pepsi Cola. I'm staying right here."


"But he seemed all right by the time you left?"

Steve sighed and ran a hand through the swirls of his dark hair, as he talked to Mr. Coleman. "Not all right, really. But better. And Darry was back home, so I didn't leave him alone."

Mr. Coleman sorted the tools in front of him, putting them all in the correct compartments in the toolbox. "It makes sense he'd be anxious after what happened. He sounded almost panicked on the phone. To be honest, he scared me."

"He scared me too, and I think he was panicking."

"That day he came here and picked up his car, he even looked scared. I remember talking to him and thinking he wasn't even hearing me. It was like he wasn't here at all."

That's cause he wasn't, Steve thought. He was caught in the grip of a night that won't let him go.


"Don't be so hard on him, kiddo. It's not his fault if he's having a tough time."

Pony scowled at TwoBit from his place on the porch swing, as he crossed his arms over his chest. "I didn't say it was his fault. It just pisses me off when all this is going on and-"

Darry's voice interrupted Pony's thought. "We need to talk, Ponyboy." He nodded toward TwoBit. "Can you give us a minute, man?"

TwoBit headed toward the door, going inside. "Sure, Darry. I'll just go grab a beer."

Darry watched the door close behind his buddy, before he joined Pony on the swing. "You're going to apologize to Soda, and I better not ever hear you talk to him that way again."

Pony let his arms fall to his sides, a sigh escaping him. "Of course I'll tell him I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to hurt him. I just got mad, and what I said is true. Besides, I've heard you say the same kind of stuff to him, and you yelled too."

"That's between me and Soda, Pony. And you know what the biggest difference is?"

"What?"

"He yelled back. You saw the state he was in, the way he was shaking and sweating. I won't have you adding to what he's going through, Ponyboy. It's not okay. I get how you'd be angry, but you're not going to take it out on Soda, especially when you can look at him and see he's hurting."

"That's exactly why I got angry, Darry! I can't stand that he'll sit there and deny it. He scares me."

"I think he was just trying to pull himself together, Pony. And you're his little brother. Soda wants you to see him being strong. He doesn't want to fall apart in front of you."

"But I know he's strong, and if he's falling apart, then at least I know he's being honest, which is what he needs to be. At least then, I know he's being real."


TwoBit turned on the TV, before taking a swig of beer, as he sat down on the couch beside Soda's feet. He looked at his sleeping friend, giving his leg a squeeze. "You're going to be fine, Sodapop. You better believe we're all seeing to that."


"I just came home to shower and change clothes, Dad."

Nicholas tossed Steve a towel from the basket of clean laundry he was folding. "Okay, Son."

Steve sifted through the laundry, looking for jeans to wear.

"Samuel's going to come over in a little while. Just to visit, you know."

"Oh."

"We haven't done that in a while."

"Yeah."

"Son?"

"Huh?"

Nicholas lifted a pair of jeans from the basket. "You have pants right here."

Steve took the jeans from his dad, holding them, along with the towel. "Oh. Guess I didn't see them."

"You seem really distracted."

"Soda called the DX earlier. He sounded so bad, Coleman told me to go to him. I wanted to anyway. So, of course, I did."

"What was wrong?"

"He was saying stuff about being alone, something hurting, and not being able to stop it. He was so anxious, Dad. Shaking all over. He said his chest hurt. That he felt like he was dying."

"Was he having flashbacks again?"

"It sounded like it from some of what he said to me when I got over there." Steve looked straight at Nicholas. "It was awful, Dad. He did calm down a lot, but it was terrible to see Soda that scared."


"Hey, Sleeping Beauty. Have a nice rest?"

Soda's vision focused in on TwoBit, as he woke up, stretching before rising to a sitting position. "Actually, I think I did. How long you been sitting there?"

TwoBit eyed the beer bottle still in his hand. "Hmm...long enough to be almost done drinking this."

"So not that long then, with the way you drink beer."

"Can't argue with you there." TwoBit swallowed the last of the beer, then set the bottle down on the coffee table. "So are you feeling better?"

"What did you hear?"

"Just that you were anxious and not looking so good for a little while there."

"Yeah. That's pretty much it."

"So?"

"So what?"

"Are you feeling better?"

"I guess so."

"I'm good for more than a laugh, you know."

Soda could see the sincerity in TwoBit's face, not used to the solemn expression. "Yeah. I know that."

"What's been happening, Sodapop?"

"The shooting, it's bothering me a lot. Making me scared all the time. Some tough Greaser I am, huh?"

"Hey, don't do that to yourself."

"But it's true. Nothing even has to be happening for me to feel like it is."

"Seems to me you got a right to be scared."

Soda looked down at his hands that rested in his lap, picking at his fingernails. "You know how Steve told you he's had flashbacks of the abuse he went through?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I have them too. Of the shooting."

TwoBit watched Soda, seeing that he wasn't looking up. He put a hand on his shoulder, keeping it there. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't know."

"You never thought Steve wasn't tough, did you?"

Soda looked up then. "No. Of course not!"

"I knew you'd say that. It's why I asked. So don't say you ain't tough either cause you are."

"You should've seen me earlier, TwoBit. I didn't look it at all."

"Come on, man. You've got nothing to feel bad about, and I know for a fact you'd tell any one of us that same thing. Damn, I was telling Pony to take it easy on you, and you're in here beating yourself up cause you're not doing great."

"You were talking to Pony? He got mad at me earlier, huh?"

"Nah. I don't think he's mad at you. I think he's mad cause he's a kid, and you still want to protect him."


"I didn't think I'd ever meet anyone again. I didn't really know if I wanted to either."

Samuel could hear the almost distant tone of Nicholas' voice, easily realizing where his friend's mind was drifting. "Have you told Audrey about Clara yet?"

Nicholas remembered his vague statement of empathy when he and Audrey had discussed her previous relationship that had ended in betrayal. "No. I haven't. I've thought about it, but I just wasn't ready. It's something I need to bring up to Steve first too."

"It seems like he'd be okay with her knowing what happened. Since he's more than all right with you being in a relationship, I'm sure he expects you'll tell her at some point."

"Yeah. I'm sure of that too. It just seems soon. But everything has been happening so fast."


"So I got over here, and Soda was on the floor, shaking like a leaf. At first, he didn't even say anything to me."

Darry heard himself sigh, picturing the scene Steve was describing. "I wonder if it's because he was alone. He was okay when I left. I just went to the store and picked Pony up from the library."

Steve leaned against the back porch railing, watching as Darry paced back and forth. "Maybe. On the phone, he did say something about being all alone. He told me nothing happened, that he was just here. I wonder too if just the idea of going back to work triggered something in him. Seems like it could."

"I'm so worried about him being back at the DX all the time. I know he has to go back sometime, but if this happens at home, what will happen there?"

Steve started to reply, but just as his mouth opened, a crashing sound came from inside the house. "What the hell was that?"