Fact of the Chapter: In the French version of Gravity Falls, A Tale of Two Stans was skipped. The show went from Not What He Seems to Dungeons, Dungeons, and more Dungeons.
Note: This will be a relatively short chapter, but the next chapter will be longer.
"Okay, Bill. First, we need to figure out what you'll look like in human form. All we need to do is get you in Wampers' body, and with your new godly powers you can shapeshift at will." said MaBill.
"SOUNDS GREAT!" agreed Bill. "I'M THINKING ABOUT THIS!"
Bill waved his hand. To his left appeared a hologram of a three-foot tall redhead boy with six toes. And not six toes on one foot, I mean six toes total. He also had a top hat drawn on his forehead.
"Umm... I was thinking more like, tall, blond, wearing a yellow tux, maybe even an eye-patch?" said MaBill.
Bill laughed. "WHO EVEN CAME UP WITH THAT? AND WHY WOULD I BE TALLER THAN MABEL?"
MaBill faltered. "W-well, you're yellow, and you wear a bow tie, so-"
"I ALSO TURN RED WHEN I'M ANGRY! ONE TIME SOME FANGIRLS OF MINE WERE ANNOYING ME, SO I TOLD THEM TO CONSTRUCT A HUMAN THRONE IN THE DESERTS OF NEVADA! CAN'T YOU BELIEVE THEY ACTUALLY OBEYED ME? MAYBE I SHOULD GO THERE, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I NEVER TOLD THEM TO LEAVE-"
"Bill! Focus! Don't you want to get with Mabel?"
"WHO? WAIT! WAIT! I REMEMBER! I THOUGHT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING ME! GOSH..."
MaBill couldn't stand it. "BILL! Do you want to walk up to Mabel looking like a Dorito?"
Bill burst into tears.
Mabifica hugged him. "Shhh... it's okay, Bill. You're not a Dorito. You're a big, strong, triangle."
Bill sniffed. "I AM? WELL, OF COURSE I KNEW THAT! YOU KNOW, THOSE EGYPTIAN PYRAMIDS DIDN'T DESIGN THEMSELVES! I ALWAYS ADMIRED THAT CULTURE, 'CAUSE THEY ALWAYS REMOVED THE MUMMIES BRAINS THROUGH THEIR NOSES! KING TUT HAD KIND OF A BIG HEAD, SO HIS NOSTRILS GOT STRETCHED OUT A LOT! MAN, THE MUMMIFIERS WERE FREAKING OUT SO MUCH, THAT THEY RUINED HIS PERFECT FACE, AND THEN..."
Several hours later...
"...SO AFTER I GOT FIRED FROM TETRIS, I HAD TO WORK AT TILLAMOOK! CAN'T YOU BELIEVE IT? SOMEONE MISTOOK ME FOR A WEDGE OF CHEESE. I HATED THAT JOB! WHEN HE WAS ASLEEP, I BENDED BACK HIS FINGERS AS FAR AS POSSIBLE! WHAT FUN! THERE WAS ANOTHER NERD THERE WHO TOLD ME THAT ALL I NEED IS THE RESURRECTION STONE AND THE ELDER WAND AND THEN I'D BE THE DEA- HEY! ARE YOU LISTENING?!"
"Hm? Uh... yeah." yawned MaBill. She was beginning to accept defeat. Bill is in love with Mabel, but there's so much going on in his triangular head that he can't even take orders from anyone. MaBill had no idea how to get Bill to Mabel.
Then she had an idea. You'll have to imagine the light bulb above MaBill's head.
MaBill would take Mabel to Bill. When he realizes that Mabel is coming, he'll finally listen to MaBill, and BOOM! It'll be just like fanfiction.
She just had to find a way to get Mabel here.
