Chapter Forty-Four

My mother and I came out of the room to greet my brother, Kotoko, and her father. I was stunned. I couldn't believe my father had kept this kind of secret.

Heart problems.

Overworking and stress had been taking a larger toll on him than he'd let anyone know. Stress over running a company that was slowly sinking and trying to get me in on it when I was unwilling. And last night, when I'd left, he'd had an attack and it was because of me. I knew I'd said some harsh things, but I never would have if I'd known it would result in this.

In the time of rushing to the hospital and learning this news from the doctor and seeing my father being wheeled away, I wondered if it was brought on by me insistently saying that I didn't want to go to college over a year ago. Of course, it wouldn't have been the only reason, but it would have been one of them, and a major one at that. I was the cause of his problems.

For that, I owed him.

Kotoko stopped pacing and her father stood, "How is he?" He asked.

"He's had a heart problem for some time now without telling anyone. I think he's been pushing himself too hard up until now." My mother said. Worry had worked its way across her wrinkled brow.

"He's on bed rest for a while to heal." I said.

"He'll be okay if he's on bed rest, right?" Kotoko's father asked.

"Yes, that's what they say," My mother answered, "He was suffering so much. He didn't have to go through that alone. I don't know what made him think he had to." She had turned to choking up. My mother's voice was strained through holding back tears.

"It's okay, Mrs. Irie, this wasn't a life-threatening situation. I'm sure he'll heal right up." Mr. Aihara said. I, on the other hand, wasn't so sure he would heal completely unless I was burdened with Pandai. I hated the thought of running that company, couldn't find any enjoyment in it. But I would do what I had to for my father, and especially since I'd caused his attack. I would take absolute responsibility for it.

"What about dad's company?" Yuuki said, "What is going to happen if he takes so many days off?"

This was the part where I stopped rebelling against my parents and doing what I wanted. Now I had no choice, "I'll do it."

Kotoko let out a small gasp. What she must've been thinking, I didn't want to know. I only hoped she wouldn't try to talk me out of this choice, for that would have made it even harder to choose Pandai. This was something I couldn't back down from for the sake of my father's health.

"But Naoki…" My mother, of all people, said, "You said you weren't sure if you wanted to take it over."

"I think he was trying to make me his successor quickly because of this heart problem. I might have caused a lot of his stress. Because of that, I'll save Pandai."

My mother gave a slight smile, "Thank you, Naoki. Thank you."

Kotoko gave me the opposite of that. She was fit with a sad look, one that said she knew I didn't want this for myself.

Hours more was spent at the hospital. Everyone stayed until my father came to. Limited to two visitors at a time for now, my mother and I went in and everyone else went home, Mr. Aihara going for his restaurant.

The room was dim and the sun was starting to set. I wasn't going to stay long, but I had to know he was okay and let him know that he didn't have to worry about Pandai anymore.

My mother scooted her chair up close to his bed and took hold of his hand, frowning at him.

"You didn't have to keep it a secret," She said, "We would have helped you."

"Oh, honey," My father breathed, "You didn't need to have it worrying you. Or, you, Naoki. I wanted you to take the company because you wanted to, not because I'm a little sick."

"A little!"

"Calm down, Noriko."

"You are in the hospital with heart problems. That is not "a little sick"." Her frown deepened.

"I'm sorry I made you worry." My father squeezed her hand back.

He looked to me, "Now, Naoki, we have something to discuss…"

"I'll take over Pandai. I'll be taking leave from college to work there, at least until you get better." I tacked on that last part to make him feel less guilty. In fact, there was nothing for him to feel guilty over. But I knew for a fact that I would continue to work at Pandai even after his recovery. If I started working there now, it was a black hole of no escape. There was no getting out of it after this, as I was so fully aware.

"Thank you. You don't know how much that means." He smiled weakly.

"I should go now. If I'm taking leave, I have to get up tomorrow and go to Tonan." I put on my coat and my father nodded.

"Naoki," My mother started, "I'll be spending a lot of time here with your father until he's released, so you three kids should split chores. Kotoko has cooking duties, but everything else is up to you."

If I hadn't felt numb, I'd have smiled. This must've been Kotoko's dream. Cooking and pretending to be a wife. I could imagine her being happy over such a silly thing even through this awful mess with my father.

I slipped through the door and headed back home.

Smoke did not billow through the house this time around. She had improved, but the food was still not very well off.

The food was unrecognizable to me. As we sat down at the table, Yuuki glowered at the food and I prayed for both of our souls.

"Please have some," Kotoko grinned despite the troubles last night brought, "I made stewed taro roots, teriyaki yellowtail, miso soup, kidney beans, and…" She cocked her head at the last dish, which I recognized from almost two years ago, "I guess you can call it fried tofu."

Again, the "fried tofu" was soggy and hanging around in even more liquid. It was mush. I held out hope that the other dishes wouldn't be so bad, but I knew better than that.

Yuuki dug in, sparing me the trouble of trying it first. One spoon of miso soup later and his tongue hung out of his mouth.

"It's hot," He said through gasps, "Too hot!"

"Oh no… but it can't be. I didn't think I'd put that pepper much in." Kotoko took a bite and her eyes just about popped out of her skull. Her feet drummed against the floor.

"Eee!" She gulped down water.

I sighed and my mouth forming a tight line. I picked up my chopsticks, no longer caring about taste.

"Onii-chan, don't eat it," Yuuki said with watery eyes, "it really is too hot."

Kotoko took another bite, forced it down, and fanned her face. With that, I opted to try a different dish first.

This one was not so hot as it was undercooked, but I would live. I chewed on a largely undercooked piece of taro root. The noise sounded through the room.

"What was that sound?" Yuuki said.

I went on chewing, "The taro root." I said calmly.

"Taro roots aren't supposed to make that sound."

"Oh no! It's undercooked!" Kotoko was horrified.

"Onii-chan, you should spit it out…"

I forcefully swallowed it and took a drink of water. Yuuki's eyebrows raised at me, "You should stop complaining and just eat your food, Yuuki."

Kotoko gaped at me for a long second. It was, after all, the first time I'd eaten her food and not complained. But she'd taken her time to make it and tried her best so I figured we should at least eat it.

And that was exactly what we did. Yuuki complained because he was a kid. But I ate without a word. I let the spices fry my tongue, chewed the taro roots, and choked down the fried tofu. For this, I could tell that she was grateful… and as far as I was concerned, she better have been, because that food was the stuff of nightmares. I would have to brush my teeth four times to lose the taste of it.

Yuuki migrated to his bedroom when it was over, his eyes still watering over the miso soup and breathing through his mouth.

Kotoko brought the dishes to the kitchen to clean. I took a moment before joining her there, then I found her at the sink with suds all on the counter.

"Oh, hi Irie-kun." She showed me her teeth, her eyes sparkling. Seeing that one little gesture smoothed some of my frayed nerves. She stopped washing dishes.

"Do you want me to make you some coffee?"

With no reason to object, I nodded, "Sure." But I wasn't here for coffee. I was here to see what she had to say about this switch when I'd told her only last night about wanting to change to the medical department. At the hospital, she hadn't had the time or space from the others to talk to me about it. Now she did.

I leaned against the counter as she placed a kettle on the stove.

"Um…" She began, "Are you really going to take over your father's company? It's just that you said you wanted to be a doctor."

"Yes. I can't hide from it and I don't want to," She waited, listening, "It's all really sudden with my father collapsing, but I won't run away from this," I said. Kotoko half smiled, but still she seemed worried, "When he recovers, I can go back to school. It wouldn't be too late. But I think I should get into his company now."

"Ah," She pepped up, "If there is anything I can do, please let me know."

I managed a weak smile in response.

"Oh, right, the coffee!" She snapped right to it and started fixing it. Meanwhile, I couldn't tear my eyes away from her, watching her every move as she fretted about making the coffee.

As I brought my cup of coffee back to my bedroom, I wondered about her offer… if there was anything she could do. No, she probably couldn't do anything more than what was already given. Coffee, talks, and an unwavering smile. That was all I was going to need from her in these coming weeks.