Note: For a little fun fact, the "edgy boyz" are actually based off of my fourth grade friend group. We were the one group everyone was afraid of, led by the edgy wise kid. Then there was the quiet kid, and the gamer guy who seemed like he would listen to metal, and the loud crazy kid, and the kid that wasn't scared to curse, and me: that one kid who just sucked up to everyone else and kept making jokes about my anxiety. The Death Song DEFINITELY sounds like something I would do in fourth grade to annoy my friends. And everyone hated me. Good times.

*some time later*

Miguel: Princess lady?

Zelda: Oh. Feel free to come in. Also, for future advice, don't assume gen-

Miguel: I know who you are.

Zelda: Right. Sorry.

Miguel: You told me to meet with you.

Zelda: Ahh yes. I told you too spy on Meta Knight, did I not?

Miguel: You did.

Zelda: Good. Could you go over to the Kirby dorm. Youŕe good at spying, right?

Miguel: I am a memes lord. I main Ridley. I'm not very quiet. Also, Meta Knight is one of my favorite characters.

Zelda: Oh. Oooooooh. I understand. Well, spying on him would be fun, right?

Miguel: Is it okay if I fanboy a little?

Zelda: Sure. Just act like yourself. That will make him less suspicious. Just act like yourself. Talk to him. Pretend you had a package addressed to him. Then start fanboying. Just act like yourself. Report back to me with any extra information. Got it?

Miguel: Uh, sure. But one question.

Zelda: What?

Miguel: I don't have anything to give him.

Zelda: Well, we must do the forbidden, well, you can do it because you're a campus helper. I need you to go to the prison.

Miguel: No way…

Zelda: That's right. The one where they keep the anime and manga characters that were sent here by fans that Master Hand doesn't want to attend classes. Go there. Find a young man with long blonde hair who looks dead inside. Ask him to make you something. Anything works, as long as it's cool and dangerous. Understand?

Miguel: Okay. So I have to find the lead singer of Nirvana?

Zelda: No. You'll know what I mean when you see him.

Miguel: Okay. *heads towards anime prison*

It was a rough journey. Poor Miguel had to walk half a mile. He hated it. He traveled for fifteen minutes until he saw his checkpoint. It was a dark, gloomy prison. He took a large gulp of Sprite Cranberry and prepared himself for the worst. A girl around his age stood at the door.

Guard: None shall pass.

Miguel: Hey Laila could I go in?

Laila: Why?

Miguel: I have to talk to the blonde guy who looks dead inside.

Laila: Oh. You mean Edward?

Miguel: Yeah, him.

Laila: Okay, go in. Enjoy your sad visit.

*Laila unlocks the door and Miguel walks in to find Edward.*

The building was rather sketchy. A boy with turquoise hair sat quietly in a corner reading fanfictions. A weird guy that kinda looked like a buff cricket man Captain America walks up to the turquoise-haired boy.

Buff Guy: Deku stop reading that!

That was weird enough, but things only got weirder when he saw a giant queue of people lining up to choke a dude with black hair and a blue headband. A sad group of ten-year-olds stood on top of furniture with signs saying "We're Pokemon Characters, too!". Miguel could tell why Master Hand didn't like these guys. Miguel stood firmly in the doorway. The weirdos didn't realize him.

Miguel: Uhh, is there someone in here named Edward who looks like he's dead inside?

*A really big suit of armor starts giggling with a childish voice. Suddenly everyone starts to laugh at the statement.*

Armor Guy: He's right here. *points to teenager who fits the description perfectly*

Miguel: *walks over* You're Edward right?

Edward: Do I really look that sad?

Miguel: *five second pause* Yes. Anyway, I have a favor to ask you.

Edward: What?

Miguel: Can you make me something "cool and dangerous"?

Edward: Sure. Be more specific.

Miguel: I need to give it to this thing that's only nine inches tall.

Edward: I… I have an idea in mind. It is EXTREMELY dangerous, and you must use it wisely.

Miguel: Understood.

Edward: Here it goes. *claps hands together; transmutes a Samsung Galaxy Note 7*

Miguel: Wow…

Edward: *Gives Miguel the device* It is explosive. Don't misuse it.

*Miguel bravely takes the device and leaves the dungeon*

Laila: How was your sad visit?

Miguel: It was okay.

Miguel set foot to walk another half mile. Fifteen minutes passed and the boy arrived at the main campus. He now had a new goal: to find Meta Knight. He went around asking everyone he saw if they had seen him. No one had. He looked around recklessly, until he noticed the little blue guy walking up to one of the dorms. He followed.

*Meanwhile…*

Lucas: Okay, okay, there's something I've GOTTA show ya guys.

Lucario: Oh god.

Lucas: C'mon. Look. Our dorm was such chaos that we had to put rules on the door. *reads out rules*

MOTHER Dorm Rules:

Mention of parents or guardian figures is strictly forbidden.

No drugs.

Mother and Mother 2 Characters: Do not enter a Mother 3 character's dorm without knocking first. You will benefit.

Respect the disabled.

Ultimate Chimera is to STRICTLY be kept in its cage at ALL TIMES.

Mother and Mother 3 Characters: Don't touch the phone unless you have to call 911.

Don't kill yourself or others.

No arson.

Mister Saturns are not beach balls.

No facism.

Franklin Badges are for emergency use only.

No PSI inside the building.

Do not keep your dorm mates hostage.

Mother 3 Characters: Do not curse towards the characters of other games in the series.

Just because you're royalty doesn't make you incharge.

Mother 3 Characters: Please, keep it all PG.

Mother and Mother 3 Characters: Never say the word "okey" without permission.

If you are depressed, please go outside.

Thank you!

Meta Knight: Umm…

Green Inkling: "No facism." I don't want to ask why that is a rule.

Joker: Heh, maybe my dorm needs rules, too. No child abuse. Yes. I like that rule.

Meta Knight: Mine could have stuff like "No eating people."

Miguel: *runs up* META KNIIIIIIIGHT!

Meta Knight: Uh…

Miguel: I have to give you something. Did you order this? *gives Meta Knight package*

Meta Knight: I didn order anything.

Miguel: Well, it was addressed to you. Take it anyway. Also, I'M A HUGE FAN.

Meta Knight: *takes package* Okay sure.

Lucas (sarcastically): Didn't you read the rules? You can't say that word too close to the dorm. Ness will kill you.

Meta Knight: Whatever. *opens package* Huh? It's empty.

Miguel: WHAAAAAAAT

Meta Knight: It's just an empty box.

Miguel: But… Oh, crap. I must've dropped it on the way back.

Meta Knight: From where?

Miguel: Uh, the dungeon.

Meta Knight: What were you doing at the dungeon?

Miguel: Uh, nothing.

*an explosion can be heard in the distance*

Lucario: What the (! #$) ?!

Ridley: Hmm, this seems rather odd. I'll go check it out. *flies away* *comes back several seconds later* Something blew up on main campus. It didn't hurt anyone, but it smells like led paint over there.

Miguel: Oh god. I should've listened to Edward.

Meta Knight: You what?

Miguel: I made a deal with Zelda to spy on you and she sent me to the anime dungeon to get some guy to make a gift for you so I could gain your trust. I'm sorry.

Meta Knight: What were you gonna give me?

Miguel: A… A Samsung Galaxy Note 7. He warned me.

Meta Knight: It's okay kid. Everyone makes mistakes. I'm good at dealing with explosions. There's nothing to worry about besides the smell of led paint. And you might get kicked off of campus.

Miguel: WHAAAAAAT

Meta Knight: It's fine. Technically it's Zelda's fault, right?

Miguel: Yeah.

Meta Knight: And guess what, you can now work for us infiltrating Zelda!

Miguel: Yeah, sounds legit. Want a Sprite Cranberry?\

Green Inkling: Actually, yes. *takes a can of Sprite Cranberry*

Meta Knight: With us on your side, everything's gonna be fine. Under one condition.

Miguel: What is that you say?

Meta Knight: Do you know a Campus Helper named Gemma?

Miguel: Yeah she tried to propose to my friend Alex once.

Meta Knight: Could you help us keep her away from Dark Pit here?

Miguel: Uh, sure.

Meta Knight: Well kid, ya got yourself a deal.