*lunch; nom nom nom*
Joker: *runs up to table* Meta Knight! I found a juul pod!
Meta Knight: nani also why are you here so early? Where's your food?
Joker: Bro, that's not important. Look. When I found these, they were wrapped in a long, thin piece of paper. I looked at the paper to see who it belonged to so I could report them, but I… I found something else.
Meta Knight: And it was… I still don get the point of your story.
Joker: It… It was Mario's FULL battle plans.
Meta Knight: Whoa, hold it. So you're saying you…
Joker: We win.
*A few minutes later; after everyone arrives at table*
Lucario: Oh ! #$ yeah!
Green Inkling: Can I curse too?
Meta Knight: I think somewhere in America kids under fourteen can get fined for cursing.
Green Inkling: But I am fourteen.
Lucas: Wait so I'm only thirteen, so-
Gemma: *walks up to table* Well, too bad you won't get older.
Lucas: I know. No one ages here.
Gemma: Whatever. I'm going to murder you.
Lucas: ?
Gemma: *eyes intensify* DO WHAT I SAY YOU LITTLE-
Meta Knight: Gemma what are you-
Gemma:This is all your fault blueberry! You and your stupid clique!
*Dark Pit hides under the table and starts resting the Holy Bible. He never actually read it, but Pit loves gods so he's heard the WHOLE thing.*
Lucario: Where did you-
Gemaa: Leave that table, hot angel boy!
Meta Knight: Can't we just, I don't know. Maybe you could explain this to us?
Gemma: Darkie, my love for you is NO MORE!
Dark Pit: Good.
Gemma: Don't fake it. You know Lucas likes you. Like, like-likes you.
Lucas: Where did you learn that?!
Gemma: I'm not telling, but anyway, all seven of you are gonna be toast.
Joker: Wait what did we ever do?
Green Inkling: Just saying, Iḿ not involved so…
Gemma: YOU KNOW YOU ARE, PUNK!
Green Inkling: How?
Gemma: BECAUSE OF YOU'RE MERE EXISTENCE! Plus, you're friends with this one. *walks up to Lucas* I had a dream warning me about you. You're a demon. A monster. It's like you could destroy an entire world.
Lucas: How did you know?
Gemma: Now's not the time for jokes, gay boyfriend-stealer.
Lucas: That sounded kind of homophobic.
Dark Pit: I never liked you.
Gemma: WHAAAAAT?!
Meta Knight: That was pretty obvious.
Ridley: You seriously thought he liked you?!
Gemma: He was my husbando!
Green Inkling: Thank god he's not anymore…
Gemma: As I was saying, the seven of you are dead meat, something my mommy never let me have. Anyway, you will fall for me!
Meta Knight: I'm confused.
Gemma: I am the most powerful being to walk this campus! *eyes blaze like crazy*
Meta Knight: Don't look!
Dark Pit: I can't. I'm under the table.
Gemma: So you know how to avoid it, eh? Well, I can't let you do it. I'm talking ESPECIALLY to YOU. *points at Lucas*
Lucas: Why do you hate me? If you're jealous of me for having a mom who supported vaccines, it's my duty to inform you that my mom is dead!
Gemma: You know why. I know you love him.
Lucas: It's just a crush! He had no idea about my attraction to him until just now!
Gemma: Well too bad! *psychic pulls Lucas towards her*
Lucas: Meta Knight!
Meta Knight: My eyes are closed, but I can try to do something.
Gemma: So you're getting the blueberry to help you? I'm afraid that won't work. He's only nine inches big, is he not? I could just step on that little runt. No one can save you.
Lucario: You are aware that I can see your aura. Oh sh**, I shouldn't of said that.
Gemma: Welp, gotta take care of you. *yeets pork at Lucario*
Lucario: Oh lor- * collapses*
Gemma: I said that I was unstoppable.
Lucas: Meta Knight… please…
Gemma: Can't you see? They've been defeated. You're my property now.
Lucas:*starts crying* CAN'T SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING?! Please.. Somebody.
Gemma: Nope! *brings eyes to full blaze; psychic forces Lucas' eyes open.* Now, you follow me, and me alone.
Meta Knight: Lucas, no…
Green Inkling: He… he's still awake, right? Lucas, what is rule number five on your dorm?
*no response*
Gemma: Heh heh. Just too bad…
Ridley: Oh great. And Lucario is down. Gemma's the only one here who can use PK Kosher to save him. She wins.
Meta Knight: There's other PSI users on this campus, right? Ness, the other characters from the MOTHER dorm, someone can learn that move and bring him back to consciousness?
Gemma: Sorry to say, but they're all under my control as well. The six of you are the only ones on this entire campus who aren't. Heh heh. Sucks to be you.
Meta Knight: … Well, maybe it does. You four. Go. Without me. Hide somewhere. Help Lucario. Stay away from this child.
Gemma: Running away? I don't think so.
Meta Knight: Oh look Donald Trump.
Gemma: Where?
Meta Knight: Run!
*exit the other five*
Gemma:Well Meta Knight, you can't get your friend back. Come back later. *teleports away*
Meta Knight: Lucas… I'm sorry.
