Angela yawned as she got into Lauren's car and greeted her friends with a sleepy good morning. It was getting even colder now and leaves were falling from trees all around them as Lauren drove them to school. Lauren's car had decent heating but it still wasn't enough to warm Angela who even with her thick coat was still cold. Poor circulation was her curse.
Jessica asked, unprompted, "Angie, did you know Katie and Ben were at Sully's yesterday?"
"No. I didn't."
She wasn't sure why her friend was asking her about Ben and Katie. She had moved on from her futile crush on Ben weeks ago and was genuinely happy for him and Katie. Though sometimes she wondered about the possible future she apparently would've had with Ben according to Alice but it was more out of curiosity than real desire. She hadn't given real thought to Ben Chenney for a while.
"Well, maybe you didn't see them since you were distracted with Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome," Jessica gave her a look. "You have some explaining to do."
She nearly groaned. She, Jacob, and Seth had been at Sully's a total of twenty minutes as they ordered their food to go then left. She hadn't looked around the diner for people she'd known because she was distracted by Seth who kept trying to get her to let him order everything on the menu. It had taken Jacob threatening to let him starve to make Seth finally pick something.
She knew she didn't have an excuse for not telling her friends about Jacob. Her friends had immediately called her the moment they had a date. It was a sacred rule among the three of them to dish on boys. A rule Angela had broken.
"He asked me on a date last minute," She tried to reason. "I barely had time to call you guys."
Lauren questioned, "And after?"
"I was tired," And being cuddled by Jacob. "I had to go to sleep for school the next day."
Jessica blew a raspberry at her. "Oh boo. You have so many excuses."
"I'm sorry," It actually felt nice to finally talk about teenage problems again. Nice and normal. "It skipped my mind."
"Because you were so distracted by his abs?" Jessica laughed. "What? We all saw him at La Push. He looks like he should be on the cover of a magazine."
"Maybe Angela just wants him to cover her, biblically," Lauren smirked at Angela's appalled and red face. "Lighten up, Weber. This is what you get for keeping secrets from us."
Angela sighed and didn't argue back. She would also be giving either Lauren or Jessica a tough time if they were in her situation. The thing with Jacob was still so new she was still trying to understand it. He was charming, funny, and honest. His body was one giant hot-water bottle. And he was drawn her to via werewolf voodoo magic. It was really hard to even begin explaining that to anyone.
"We gave you a pass for Edward," Jessica said. "But you have to dish on Mr. Six Pack or this friendship is over."
She hadn't told them about Edward because that barely lasted for it to be significant. Not that his abandonment still didn't sting. And there wasn't really much to tell, just the notes she still hadn't thrown away yet no matter how much she pushed herself to. On the other hand, Jacob…
She knew she was blushing as she remembered kissing Jacob in her bed, at La Push, and in her dreams. Imprinting was a two-way street. And she got the same gravity-pulling force from him too. Even if she wasn't quite comfortable with it.
Jessica smacked her on the arm. "You've done things with him, haven't you?"
"No," Not like how they thought. Angela would probably expire on the spot if Jacob tried to go any further. "We just kissed."
Lauren rolled her eyes from the driver's seat. They were finally at school and Angela had never been more relived to see the giant brick structure in her life. She wanted to jump out of the car to safety. However, any plans of escape were dashed by Lauren.
"And don't think you've gotten away," The blonde warned. "We'll find you at lunchtime."
Angela thought her face was going to be permanently red after the lunchtime interrogation from her friends. Lauren and Jessica tried to extract every embarrassing detail they could. It probably didn't help that this was the first time she had anything to dish and her visible discomfort was amusing to them. Jessica kept waxing poetic about Jacob's good looks and how pretty and tall Jacob and Angela's babies would be.
"They'd be giants," Jessica laughed. "Like seven feet tall and overlooking over us mere mortals."
"It's not their fault you're a hobbit, Jess," Lauren countered. "We should be happy our tall elf friend finally found a mate."
Angela balked at her. "Did you just make a Lord of the Rings reference?"
Lauren sighed, wearily. "If either of you ever try to actually date Mike Newton, that is all you have to look forward to."
Jessica looked thoughtful at that and Angela was more than happy to drop the subject of Jacob and babies. Because chances were their combined genetics would produce some really tall offspring. She wasn't sure if that was the werewolf magic on his end or if they really were just blessed that way. She hadn't met any of his family yet so she couldn't compare for accuracy.
After her last class, she was about to get a ride with Tyler when she saw Jacob Black pull up into the school parking lot on a motorcycle. She watched almost in a trance as he pulled up beside her and gave her his sunniest smile. Tyler and Eric were staring at him in confusion and surprise. She cleared her throat at Jacob and gave him a look.
He ignored it. "Hey, darling. You need a ride?"
"I was about to get a ride with my friends," She frowned. "Where did you even get the motorcycle?"
"My friends and I have been working on restoring bikes for fun," He replied, flippantly. "Now, will you please get on the bike and we can pretend it's the ending of that 80's film with the lawnmower?"
"Is he talking about Can't Buy Me Love?" Eric said in disbelief. "As in John Hughes?"
Tyler was just as shocked. "How do you know John Hughes?"
"I have two older sisters who liked John Hughes films," Jacob practically shrugged. "Angie, please get on the bike. I won't crash us. I promise."
Angela hesitated for about a full minute before Jacob's pleading gaze, that was eerily too much like Seth's, made her cave. She put on the helmet Jacob handed her and hopped onto the bike. Eric had gone to his car and started playing a song through the speakers. It was the ending song of The Breakfast Club.
"Hey, it's a cinematic moment," Eric told her. "Just enjoy it, Angie."
"Tell me your troubles and doubts," The song played through the parking lot, getting the attention of other students. "Giving me everything inside and out…"
She didn't have really anything to say as Jacob revved the engine. She could only hold on to him as he began driving them away. Eric and Tyler waved at her as they mouthed to the song's lyrics. "Love's strange so real in the dark," The car speakers crooned, "Think of the tender things we were working on…"
Angela knew she would never live this down.
She had never been on a motorcycle before and she held on to Jacob for dear life as houses passed by them, the wind in their faces. They arrived at her house faster than she ever expected and she got off the motorcycle on shaky legs like a newborn fawn. Taking off the helmet, she handed it back to Jacob who rested it on the seat behind him. Familiar shyness overcame her as she wasn't sure what to do next.
Jacob took mercy on her and pulled the necklace he was wearing off his head. On the long strand of leather was a wolf head carved on lacquered dark wood. It was meticulous work as she could make out the slope of the ears down to the pointed snout. It was slightly bigger than a quarter.
"I made that for you," He smiled at her surprise. "I'm not just a one-trick pony, Ang."
She closed her hand around the wolf charm and held it to her chest. "You said you weren't artistic."
"I said I couldn't draw," He contradicted. "I'm a decent whittler."
She could only smile at him as she put the necklace over her head and the charm rested at sternum. "What other surprises do you have for me, Jacob Black?"
"You'll have to wait and find out."
He took her hand and gently pulled her back to him so he could kiss her goodbye. It was sweet and chase. Maybe it was the motorcycle ride straight out of a movie or the fact Jacob must've spent hours working on that little wolf but in that moment, she really liked Jacob Black. And not in a quiet and steady way but like the exciting and fun love stories she secretly always wanted.
He pulled away and whispered, "I'll see you later."
She watched him drive away on his motorcycle and knew why all those girls in movies looked so starry-eyed. She knew her face had to be the same. She was in big trouble. Very big trouble
Jacob sighed and took a seat on her bed, his head bowed. She didn't say anything and waited for him to talk. She had learned that Jacob didn't really need too much prompting to say how he felt. He wasn't one for mind games or putting on a mask. He was always himself, no excuses needed.
"How was your day, dear?" She finally asked after the silence when on too long. "Monday giving you the blues?"
"I fought with Embry today," He answered and moved closer so he could rest his head against her stomach. She ran her fingers through his hair the way he liked. "He was on my ass again about being Alpha."
She was no stranger to fights among friends. Her friends had their share of arguments and tiffs over the years and she had been the peacemaker. One important thing was to listen to both sides of the story so she could figure out how to fix the problem. The solution was easier than the two parties ever considered.
She prompted him to continue. "And?"
"Sam is getting married in December and he wants to step down as Alpha after that to focus on family," Jacob replied. "Emily is pregnant and Sam wants to just be a dad without all the pack responsibility on him."
"That's not necessarily a bad thing," She conceded. "Can no one else be the Alpha besides him?"
"We have Jared and Paul but neither of them are suitable," He frowned. "Especially not Paul."
She remembered Jacob mentioning Paul's temper in the past and quietly agreed. "And why does Embry think you're the best choice as replacement?"
"He says I was born for it," Jacob closed his eyes. "That I'm being a coward for stepping up and claiming it."
Oh boy. She could see where this was headed.
"And what did you say?"
"I said I wasn't the Alpha," He swallowed. "That I'm just a stupid kid. I can't be the leader they want me to be."
Responsibility was daunting and terrifying especially when it was of this magnitude. She'd seen people rise to the challenge and others crumble when it came to moments where they needed to be stronger. Such things were always simpler in theory but not in practice. And what they asked of Jacob required sacrifice.
"It's terrifying," He confessed. "This expectation for greatness. I'm afraid I'll let everyone down and they'll hate me."
But Embry was right that Jacob was born for it. He had a confidence in himself and a way of being able to talk to his friends that made him different. There was a reason Sam made him mentor Seth. Only he could be able to help him because Jacob was a born leader.
"The only way you will know is to try," She remembered the advice her mother had told her when she was little and too shy to make friends. "Not trying is failure on its own. And they won't hate you."
"How can you know that?"
"Because you're like the sun, Jacob Black," She smiled as he looked up at her, this beautiful boy who outshone all the others. "And I know that you will, like the great men before you, be the Alpha the pack needs."
His eyes were wet as he stared at her unsure of himself. He was terrified and he looked like the teenage boy he was. It made her heart ache. She leaned closer to kiss his brow, the top of his cheekbone, and beside his mouth.
"You'll be there if I fail, right?"
"Every second of it," She reassured him. "You are going to be everything."
He bowed his head like a devout man praying. It humbled her. To be someone's safe place. To be needed.
"There's something else about Embry," He reached for her hand. "He might be my half-brother."
He explained the circumstances of Embry Call's birth. How his mother came from another tribe and how people expected she left Embry's father there. How when this summer when Embry shifted into a wolf, people realized his father had to be Quileute. And there were three possible fathers one of which was Billy Black. Embry's mother, Tiffany Call, refused to name his father and it caused tension in the pack.
"If Embry is my brother than that means my father was unfaithful to my mother," Jacob said. "And I could never look at him the same way."
"Have you asked your father?"
He shook his head vehemently. "I don't want to know. If the answer is yes, then things we'll get more complicated."
Because that would make Embry the other choice for Alpha. She suddenly understood why Embry was pushing for Jacob to step up because that would mean he did not have to. And this banked on if Embry really was Billy Black's son and not the half-brother of Quill or Sam. It was a complicated mess.
"Embry said I'm ungrateful," Jacob scoffed. "Because I know my place in this world and I don't even want it."
Unlike Embry who he didn't know if he was meant for a crown or nothing at all. Embry's resentment made sense, fuelled by jealousy because out of all the choices for his father Billy was the best possibility. Best in what it could give him with how Jacob described how his father was like. She felt for him and how sad and angry he must be for longing for things he couldn't have.
"Do you think Embry wants to be the Alpha?"
He thought about it for a moment before answering, "I really don't know."
She had to babysit the twins on Tuesday since her parents were busy with the church and wouldn't be back to later that night. After feeding the twins and helping them with their homework, the twins were still overactive (probably because of the contraband candy bars she gave them). She did her old trick of putting on Jurassic Park and letting them watch it until they inevitably fell asleep half way through the movie. Jacob had snuck in from her bedroom window just as the twins fell asleep and he helped her carry them to their beds.
She left him to do her nightly routine and found him looking through the wooden box and reading the notes inside. She put down her hairbrush and snatched the box from him. Closing the lid, she placed the box back into the drawer of her bedside table. He was glaring at the floor. She was annoyed with him and crossed her arms over her chest. She didn't like to think about Edward's notes as the sight of them made her want to cry. They felt like echoes of a lost dream.
"They're from him, aren't they?" He sounded angry. "And you still keep them?"
"Yes and you shouldn't be going through my things," She tried to keep calm. "That's not okay."
He scoffed. "What's not okay is you still clinging to the thought of him coming back for you."
The words hit her harshly. They were cruel and she wanted him to leave. She was angry and she felt the stupid tears trying to escape her again. Why was she always crying?
"Get out," She demanded. "Now!"
He was instantly regretful. His expression was pained as he got to his feet. He tried to reach for her but she shook him off. She started pushing him towards the window. He held his ground.
"Ang-"
"Just get out!" She shouted, still trying to push him to go away. "Get out and leave me alone!"
"Angela, I'm sorry-"
"No, you're not!" She retorted. "Because you meant what you said!"
He exhaled harshly. "I didn't mean to hurt you-"
"But you did!" She stopped trying to push. He was a damn wall. "I wish you never imprinted on me!"
He crumbled at her words. His brown eyes were wide with hurt as if she struck him. She didn't mean the words but they were out of her mouth before she could think twice. This was why she tried not to get angry because this happened. Two people hurting each other without a second thought and now she said words she couldn't take back.
"I...I didn't mean to," She sat down on her bed and covered her face with her hands. "I didn't mean to say that."
"I know," He sighed and knekt down in front of her. "I'm sorry. I got jealous and I…I couldn't understand why he did it."
She asked, "Did what?"
"Leave you," He replied, taking her hands in his. "I read those notes. He sounded he like he cared about you and yet…"
He left. And those notes were just words on paper.
She leaned down and rested her forehead against his. "Please don't hurt me like he did."
She was crying. She was terrified that she was falling for this again with a different boy. Because she wasn't sure if imprinting was even strong enough to not make him leave. That she wasn't ever going to be enough.
"I promise to never leave you," He whispered. "Until your heart stops beating."
We are actually not far from the end of the story. I started writing this story on the 17th and now it's the 29th. January has been the longest month ever. I'm ready for February.
1. The motorcycle scene was a tribute to the books/movies where Jacob had a motorcycle. And the last line is from Eclipse. It's also inspired by the ending of the film 'Easy A'. I know it's unrealistic but that's what fiction is for.
2. 'The Breakfast Club' and 'Can't Buy Me Love' are 80's teen films, directed by the late John Hughes.
3. The song that played during the motorcycle scene is 'Don't You Forget About Me' by Simple Minds and is also the chapter title.
4. 'Jurassic Park' is an 90's science fiction adventure film.
